diff --git a/AGENTS.md b/AGENTS.md index dafd9da6..1c206a83 100644 --- a/AGENTS.md +++ b/AGENTS.md @@ -9,8 +9,13 @@ that make changes to the repository. Not even `git add`** When moving, copying or deleting files, use the git commands: `git mv`, `git cp`, `git rm` +When I ask to update AGENTS.md (even if maybe) extract a general rule from what I said +before and update AGENTS.md (unless it's already in there -- maybe reformulate since +it apparently didn't work). Also, when it looks like I state a general rule, add it to +AGENTS.md. In all cases show what you added to AGENTS.md. + - Don't use '!' on the command line, it's some bash magic (even inside single quotes) -- Activate `.venv`: `make venv; source .venv/bin/activate` (run this only once) +- When running 'make' commands, do not use the venv (the Makefile uses 'uv run') - To get API keys in ad-hoc code, call `load_dotenv()` - Use `pytest test` to run tests in test/ - Use `pyright` to check type annotations in src/, tools/, tests/, examples/ diff --git a/src/typeagent/aitools/model_adapters.py b/src/typeagent/aitools/model_adapters.py index d1e79c09..db289b5b 100644 --- a/src/typeagent/aitools/model_adapters.py +++ b/src/typeagent/aitools/model_adapters.py @@ -233,12 +233,18 @@ def create_chat_model( if _needs_azure_fallback(provider): from pydantic_ai.models.openai import OpenAIChatModel + from .utils import parse_azure_endpoint_parts + if os.getenv("OPENAI_MODEL"): print( f"OPENAI_MODEL={os.getenv('OPENAI_MODEL')!r} ignored; " f"Azure deployment is determined by AZURE_OPENAI_ENDPOINT" ) - model = OpenAIChatModel(model_name, provider=_make_azure_provider()) + _, _, deployment_name = parse_azure_endpoint_parts() + model = OpenAIChatModel( + deployment_name or model_name, + provider=_make_azure_provider(), + ) else: model = infer_model(model_spec) return PydanticAIChatModel(model) @@ -283,6 +289,7 @@ def create_embedding_model( from pydantic_ai.embeddings.openai import OpenAIEmbeddingModel from .embeddings import model_to_envvar + from .utils import parse_azure_endpoint_parts # Look up model-specific Azure endpoint, falling back to the generic one. suggested_envvar = model_to_envvar.get(model_name) @@ -296,7 +303,11 @@ def create_embedding_model( api_key_envvar = "AZURE_OPENAI_API_KEY" azure_provider = _make_azure_provider(endpoint_envvar, api_key_envvar) - embedding_model = OpenAIEmbeddingModel(model_name, provider=azure_provider) + _, _, deployment_name = parse_azure_endpoint_parts(endpoint_envvar) + embedding_model = OpenAIEmbeddingModel( + deployment_name or model_name, + provider=azure_provider, + ) embedder = _PydanticAIEmbedder(embedding_model) else: embedder = _PydanticAIEmbedder(model_spec) diff --git a/src/typeagent/aitools/utils.py b/src/typeagent/aitools/utils.py index 55b3bd8f..f25aaade 100644 --- a/src/typeagent/aitools/utils.py +++ b/src/typeagent/aitools/utils.py @@ -190,6 +190,21 @@ def parse_azure_endpoint( Raises: RuntimeError: If endpoint is not found or doesn't contain api-version. """ + endpoint, version, _ = parse_azure_endpoint_parts(endpoint_envvar) + return endpoint, version + + +def parse_azure_endpoint_parts( + endpoint_envvar: str = "AZURE_OPENAI_ENDPOINT", +) -> tuple[str, str, str | None]: + """Parse Azure OpenAI endpoint, version, and optional deployment name. + + Returns: + Tuple of (endpoint_url, api_version, deployment_name). + + The deployment name is extracted from endpoints of the form + ``.../openai/deployments//...`` and is ``None`` otherwise. + """ azure_endpoint = os.getenv(endpoint_envvar) if not azure_endpoint: raise RuntimeError(f"Environment variable {endpoint_envvar} not found") @@ -200,12 +215,22 @@ def parse_azure_endpoint( f"{endpoint_envvar}={azure_endpoint} doesn't contain valid api-version field" ) + clean_endpoint = azure_endpoint.split("?", 1)[0] + deployment_match = re.search( + r"/openai/deployments/([^/?]+)(?:/.*)?$", + clean_endpoint, + ) + deployment_name = deployment_match.group(1) if deployment_match else None + # Strip query string and /openai... path — AsyncAzureOpenAI expects a # clean base URL and builds the deployment path internally. - clean_endpoint = azure_endpoint.split("?", 1)[0] - clean_endpoint = re.sub(r"/openai(/deployments/.*)?$", "", clean_endpoint) + clean_endpoint = re.sub( + r"/openai(?:/deployments/[^/?]+(?:/.*)?)?$", + "", + clean_endpoint, + ) - return clean_endpoint, m.group(1) + return clean_endpoint, m.group(1), deployment_name def get_azure_api_key(azure_api_key: str) -> str: @@ -272,6 +297,15 @@ def create_async_openai_client( ) +def resolve_azure_model_name( + model_name: str, + endpoint_envvar: str = "AZURE_OPENAI_ENDPOINT", +) -> str: + """Resolve an Azure deployment name from an endpoint, if present.""" + _, _, deployment_name = parse_azure_endpoint_parts(endpoint_envvar) + return deployment_name or model_name + + # The true return type is pydantic_ai.Agent[T], but that's an optional dependency. def make_agent[T](cls: type[T]): """Create Pydantic AI agent using hardcoded preferences.""" @@ -291,7 +325,10 @@ def make_agent[T](cls: type[T]): Wrapper = ToolOutput print(f"## Using Azure with {Wrapper.__name__} ##") - model = OpenAIChatModel("gpt-4o", provider=azure_provider) + model = OpenAIChatModel( + resolve_azure_model_name("gpt-4o"), + provider=azure_provider, + ) else: raise RuntimeError( diff --git a/tests/test_mcp_server.py b/tests/test_mcp_server.py index d70c2275..16577f86 100644 --- a/tests/test_mcp_server.py +++ b/tests/test_mcp_server.py @@ -6,7 +6,8 @@ import json import os import sys -from typing import Any +from types import SimpleNamespace +from typing import Any, cast from unittest.mock import AsyncMock import pytest @@ -24,7 +25,7 @@ from openai.types.chat import ChatCompletionMessageParam import typechat -from typeagent.aitools.utils import create_async_openai_client +from typeagent.aitools.utils import create_async_openai_client, resolve_azure_model_name from typeagent.mcp.server import MCPTypeChatModel, QuestionResponse from conftest import EPISODE_53_INDEX @@ -76,8 +77,12 @@ async def sampling_callback( messages.insert(0, {"role": "system", "content": params.systemPrompt}) # Call OpenAI + model_name = "gpt-4o" + if os.getenv("AZURE_OPENAI_API_KEY") and not os.getenv("OPENAI_API_KEY"): + model_name = resolve_azure_model_name(model_name) + response = await client.chat.completions.create( - model="gpt-4o", + model=model_name, messages=messages, max_tokens=params.maxTokens, temperature=params.temperature if params.temperature is not None else 1.0, @@ -343,3 +348,63 @@ def test_answer_type_coverage(self) -> None: assert answered.type == "Answered" no_answer = AnswerResponse(type="NoAnswer", why_no_answer="dunno") assert no_answer.type == "NoAnswer" + + +@pytest.mark.asyncio +async def test_sampling_callback_uses_azure_deployment_name( + monkeypatch: pytest.MonkeyPatch, +) -> None: + """Azure-only sampling should send the resolved deployment name.""" + create = AsyncMock( + return_value=SimpleNamespace( + choices=[ + SimpleNamespace( + message=SimpleNamespace(content="response"), + ) + ], + model="gpt-4o-2", + ) + ) + fake_client = SimpleNamespace( + chat=SimpleNamespace( + completions=SimpleNamespace( + create=create, + ) + ) + ) + + monkeypatch.delenv("OPENAI_API_KEY", raising=False) + monkeypatch.setenv("AZURE_OPENAI_API_KEY", "test-key") + monkeypatch.setattr( + sys.modules[__name__], + "create_async_openai_client", + lambda: fake_client, + ) + monkeypatch.setattr( + sys.modules[__name__], + "resolve_azure_model_name", + lambda model_name: f"{model_name}-2", + ) + + params = CreateMessageRequestParams( + messages=[ + SamplingMessage( + role="user", + content=TextContent(type="text", text="hello"), + ) + ], + maxTokens=32, + ) + + result = await sampling_callback( + cast(RequestContext[ClientSessionType, Any, Any], None), + params, + ) + + create.assert_awaited_once_with( + model="gpt-4o-2", + messages=[{"role": "user", "content": "hello"}], + max_tokens=32, + temperature=1.0, + ) + assert result.model == "gpt-4o-2" diff --git a/tests/test_model_adapters.py b/tests/test_model_adapters.py index 11907bd9..a6f0770d 100644 --- a/tests/test_model_adapters.py +++ b/tests/test_model_adapters.py @@ -17,10 +17,12 @@ from pydantic_ai.models import Model import typechat +from typeagent.aitools import model_adapters from typeagent.aitools.embeddings import CachingEmbeddingModel, NormalizedEmbedding from typeagent.aitools.model_adapters import ( configure_models, create_chat_model, + create_embedding_model, PydanticAIChatModel, PydanticAIEmbedder, ) @@ -189,3 +191,83 @@ def test_configure_models_returns_correct_types( chat, embedder = configure_models("openai:gpt-4o", "openai:text-embedding-3-small") assert isinstance(chat, PydanticAIChatModel) assert isinstance(embedder, CachingEmbeddingModel) + + +def test_create_embedding_model_uses_azure_deployment_name( + monkeypatch: pytest.MonkeyPatch, +) -> None: + """Azure embedding endpoints contribute the deployment name.""" + captured: dict[str, object] = {} + provider = object() + + class FakeOpenAIEmbeddingModel: + def __init__(self, model_name: str, provider: object) -> None: + captured["azure_model_name"] = model_name + captured["provider"] = provider + + monkeypatch.delenv("OPENAI_API_KEY", raising=False) + monkeypatch.setenv("AZURE_OPENAI_API_KEY", "test-key") + monkeypatch.setenv( + "AZURE_OPENAI_ENDPOINT_EMBEDDING", + "https://myhost.openai.azure.com/openai/deployments/ada-002/embeddings?api-version=2025-01-01-preview", + ) + monkeypatch.setattr( + model_adapters, + "_make_azure_provider", + lambda endpoint_envvar, api_key_envvar: provider, + ) + monkeypatch.setattr( + "pydantic_ai.embeddings.openai.OpenAIEmbeddingModel", + FakeOpenAIEmbeddingModel, + ) + monkeypatch.setattr( + model_adapters, + "_PydanticAIEmbedder", + lambda embedding_model: embedding_model, + ) + + embedder = create_embedding_model() + + assert isinstance(embedder, CachingEmbeddingModel) + assert captured["azure_model_name"] == "ada-002" + assert captured["provider"] is provider + assert embedder.model_name == "text-embedding-ada-002" + + +def test_create_chat_model_uses_azure_deployment_name( + monkeypatch: pytest.MonkeyPatch, +) -> None: + """Azure chat endpoints contribute the deployment name.""" + captured: dict[str, object] = {} + provider = object() + + class FakeOpenAIChatModel: + def __init__(self, model_name: str, provider: object) -> None: + captured["azure_model_name"] = model_name + captured["provider"] = provider + + async def request(self, *args: object, **kwargs: object) -> ModelResponse: + raise AssertionError("request() should not be called in this test") + + monkeypatch.delenv("OPENAI_API_KEY", raising=False) + monkeypatch.delenv("OPENAI_MODEL", raising=False) + monkeypatch.setenv("AZURE_OPENAI_API_KEY", "test-key") + monkeypatch.setenv( + "AZURE_OPENAI_ENDPOINT", + "https://myhost.openai.azure.com/openai/deployments/gpt-4o-2/chat/completions?api-version=2025-01-01-preview", + ) + monkeypatch.setattr( + model_adapters, + "_make_azure_provider", + lambda endpoint_envvar="AZURE_OPENAI_ENDPOINT", api_key_envvar="AZURE_OPENAI_API_KEY": provider, + ) + monkeypatch.setattr( + "pydantic_ai.models.openai.OpenAIChatModel", + FakeOpenAIChatModel, + ) + + chat_model = create_chat_model() + + assert isinstance(chat_model, PydanticAIChatModel) + assert captured["azure_model_name"] == "gpt-4o-2" + assert captured["provider"] is provider diff --git a/tests/test_utils.py b/tests/test_utils.py index ec240899..cd3336f7 100644 --- a/tests/test_utils.py +++ b/tests/test_utils.py @@ -156,6 +156,19 @@ def test_query_string_stripped_with_path( assert "?" not in endpoint assert version == "2025-01-01-preview" + def test_deployment_name_extracted(self, monkeypatch: pytest.MonkeyPatch) -> None: + """Deployment name is extracted from deployment-style endpoints.""" + monkeypatch.setenv( + "TEST_ENDPOINT", + "https://myhost.openai.azure.com/openai/deployments/ada-002/embeddings?api-version=2025-01-01-preview", + ) + endpoint, version, deployment = utils.parse_azure_endpoint_parts( + "TEST_ENDPOINT" + ) + assert endpoint == "https://myhost.openai.azure.com" + assert version == "2025-01-01-preview" + assert deployment == "ada-002" + def test_query_string_stripped_multiple_params( self, monkeypatch: pytest.MonkeyPatch ) -> None: diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_01__Whither_Canada_/0_Episode1_head_tail.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_01__Whither_Canada_/0_Episode1_head_tail.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..48fd8218 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_01__Whither_Canada_/0_Episode1_head_tail.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,35 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Intro titles, announcer, beach 'It's' man, end credits and final score. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:05.000 +[action] A ragged man struggles out of the sea onto a beach, collapses, and announces. + +00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:07.000 + +It's… + +00:00:07.000 --> 00:00:10.000 + +Monty Python's Flying Circus. + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:20.000 +[action] Titles begin with the words 'Monty Python's Flying Circus'. Various bizarre things happen. Titles end on an ordinary grey-suited announcer by a desk, smiling confidently. + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:22.000 + +Good evening. + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:30.000 +[action] Announcer sits; a loud squeal like a pig being sat upon. Cut to a blackboard with rows of pigs drawn. A man crosses one pig off in chalk. + +00:29:30.000 --> 00:29:40.000 +[action] The seashore again. The 'It's' man lies on the beach. A stick from off-screen prods him. Exhausted, he rises and staggers back into the sea. + +00:29:40.000 --> 00:29:50.000 +[caption] "WHITHER CANADA" WAS CONCEIVED WRITTEN AND PERFORMED BY… (CREDITS) + +00:29:50.000 --> 00:29:58.000 + +And here is the final score: Pigs 9 - British Bipeds 4. The Pigs go on to meet Vicki Carr in the final. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_01__Whither_Canada_/1_It's_Wolfgang_Amadeus_Mozart.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_01__Whither_Canada_/1_It's_Wolfgang_Amadeus_Mozart.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..d08a7bdb --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_01__Whither_Canada_/1_It's_Wolfgang_Amadeus_Mozart.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,66 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Segment begins at anchor #1. + +00:02:00.000 --> 00:02:06.000 +[caption] IT'S WOLFGANG AMADEUS MOZART + +00:02:06.000 --> 00:02:12.000 +[action] Mozart sits at a piano, tinkling with the keys; he finishes tinkling. + +00:02:12.000 --> 00:02:26.000 + +Hello again, and welcome to the show. Tonight we continue to look at some famous deaths. Tonight we start with the wonderful death of Genghis Khan, conqueror of India. Take it away Genghis. + +00:02:26.000 --> 00:02:40.000 +[action] Cut to Genghis Khan's tent. He strides purposefully. Indian-style music plays, then cuts out. With a squawk, Genghis launches into the air and lands on his back. Judges hold up score cards. + +00:02:40.000 --> 00:02:45.000 + +9.1, 9.3, 9.7, that's 28.1 for Genghis Khan. + +00:02:45.000 --> 00:02:50.000 +[action] Mozart still at the piano. + +00:02:50.000 --> 00:02:56.000 + +Bad luck Genghis. Nice to have you on the show. And now here are the scores. + +00:02:56.000 --> 00:03:12.000 +[action] Scoreboard appears with Eddie Waring standing by it, listing historical death scores. + +00:03:12.000 --> 00:03:40.000 + +Well there you can see the scores now. St Stephen in the lead there with his stoning, then comes King Richard the Third at Bosworth Field, a grand death that, then the very lovely Jean d'Arc, then Marat in his bath - best of friends with Charlotte in the showers afterwards - then A. Lincoln of the U.S of A, a grand little chap that, and number six Genghis Khan, and the back marker King Edward the Seventh. Back to you, Wolfgang. + +00:03:40.000 --> 00:03:44.000 +[action] Mozart still at piano. + +00:03:44.000 --> 00:03:56.000 + +Thank you, Eddie. And now time for this week's request death. For Mr and Mrs Violet Stebbings of 23 Wolverston Road, Hull, the death of Mr Bruce Foster of Guildford. + +00:03:56.000 --> 00:04:02.000 +[action] Cut to a lounge. Mr Foster sits in a chair. + +00:04:02.000 --> 00:04:05.000 + +Strewth! [action] He dies. + +00:04:05.000 --> 00:04:10.000 +[action] Mozart looks at his watch. + +00:04:10.000 --> 00:04:28.000 + +Oh blimey, how time flies. Sadly we are reaching the end of yet another programme and so it is finale time. We are proud to be bringing to you one of the evergreen bucket kickers. Yes, the wonderful death of the famous English Admiral Nelson. + +00:04:28.000 --> 00:04:38.000 +[action] Cut to a modern office block. After a pause, a body flies out of the top window, dressed as Nelson, plummeting with a strangled scream. + +00:04:38.000 --> 00:04:40.000 + +Kiss me Hardy! + +00:04:40.000 --> 00:04:46.000 +[action] The body hits the ground. Loud pig squeal. Transition to next skit. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_01__Whither_Canada_/2_Famous_deaths.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_01__Whither_Canada_/2_Famous_deaths.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..f6cd9230 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_01__Whither_Canada_/2_Famous_deaths.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,11 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Segment begins at anchor #2 (continues in-studio Mozart host framing). + +00:05:00.000 --> 00:05:05.000 +[action] Return to Mozart at piano for famous deaths segment framing. + +00:05:05.000 --> 00:05:20.000 + +Hello again, and welcome to the show. Tonight we continue to look at some famous deaths... + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_01__Whither_Canada_/3_Italian_lesson.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_01__Whither_Canada_/3_Italian_lesson.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..28a6d7f5 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_01__Whither_Canada_/3_Italian_lesson.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,134 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Segment begins at anchor #3. + +00:06:00.000 --> 00:06:08.000 +[action] Night school teacher looks out of window, crosses off a pig on the blackboard, writes 'Italian' under 'evening classes 7-8 p.m.', turns to camera. + +00:06:08.000 --> 00:06:22.000 + +Ah - good evening everyone, and welcome to the second of our Italian language classes, in which we'll be helping you brush up your Italian. Last week we started at the beginning, and we learnt the Italian for a 'spoon'. Now, I wonder how many of you can remember what it was? + +00:06:22.000 --> 00:06:26.000 +[caption] Shouts of 'Si! Si! Si!' from the class of Italians. + +00:06:26.000 --> 00:06:32.000 + +Not all at once … sit down Mario. Giuseppe! + +00:06:32.000 --> 00:06:36.000 + +Il cucchiaio. + +00:06:36.000 --> 00:06:42.000 + +Well done Giuseppe, or, as the Italians would say: 'Molto bene, Giuseppe'. + +00:06:42.000 --> 00:06:48.000 + +Grazie signor … grazie di tutta la sua gentilezza. + +00:06:48.000 --> 00:07:06.000 + +Well, now, this week we're going to learn some useful phrases to help us open a conversation with an Italian. Now first of all try telling him where you come from. For example, I would say: 'Sono Inglese di Gerrard's Cross', I am an Englishman from Gerrard's Cross. Shall we all try that together? + +00:07:06.000 --> 00:07:10.000 + +Sono Inglese di Gerrard's Cross. + +00:07:10.000 --> 00:07:16.000 + +Not too bad, now let's try it with somebody else. Er… Mr… ? + +00:07:16.000 --> 00:07:20.000 + +Mariolini. + +00:07:20.000 --> 00:07:26.000 + +Ah, Mr Mariolini, and where are you from? + +00:07:26.000 --> 00:07:30.000 + +Napoli, signor. + +00:07:30.000 --> 00:07:34.000 + +Ah … you're an Italian. + +00:07:34.000 --> 00:07:38.000 + +Si, si signor! + +00:07:38.000 --> 00:07:44.000 + +Well in that case you would say: 'Sono Italiano di Napoli'. + +00:07:44.000 --> 00:07:50.000 + +Ah, capisco, mille grazie signor… + +00:07:50.000 --> 00:07:54.000 + +Per favore, signor! + +00:07:54.000 --> 00:07:58.000 + +Yes? + +00:07:58.000 --> 00:08:12.000 + +Non conosgeve parliamente, signor devo me parlo sono Italiano di Napoli quando il habitare de Milano. + +00:08:12.000 --> 00:08:16.000 + +I'm sorry … I don't understand! + +00:08:16.000 --> 00:08:22.000 +[action] Giuseppe points to Francesco. + +00:08:22.000 --> 00:08:28.000 + +My friend say 'Why must he say…' + +00:08:28.000 --> 00:08:36.000 +[action] A Teutonic figure in Lederhosen stands at the back, raising a hand. + +00:08:36.000 --> 00:08:42.000 + +Bitte mein Herr. Was ist das Won für Mittelschmerz? + +00:08:42.000 --> 00:08:46.000 + +Ah! Helmut - you want the German classes. + +00:08:46.000 --> 00:08:56.000 + +Oh ja! Danke schön. Ah das deutsche Klassenzimmer… Ach! + +00:08:56.000 --> 00:09:02.000 + +My friend he say, 'Why must I say I am Italian from Napoli when he lives in Milan?' + +00:09:02.000 --> 00:09:10.000 + +Ah, I… well, tell your friend … if he lives in Milan he must say 'Sono Italiano di Milano…' + +00:09:10.000 --> 00:09:20.000 +[action] Francesco leaps up, agitated. + +00:09:20.000 --> 00:09:32.000 + +Eeeeeee! Milano è tanto meglio di Napoli. Milano è la citta la più bella di tutti … nel mondo… + +00:09:32.000 --> 00:09:36.000 + +He say 'Milan is better than Napoli'. + +00:09:36.000 --> 00:09:42.000 + +Oh, he shouldn't be saying that, we haven't done comparatives yet. + +00:09:42.000 --> 00:09:56.000 +[action] The class erupts into agitated Italian chatter. A mandolin-playing Italian strikes up 'Quando Caliente Del Sol' or similar. The teacher loses control, retreats to his desk, sits—loud pig squeal—jumps up. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_01__Whither_Canada_/4_Whizzo_butter.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_01__Whither_Canada_/4_Whizzo_butter.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..6aa7845f --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_01__Whither_Canada_/4_Whizzo_butter.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,41 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Segment begins at anchor #4. + +00:10:00.000 --> 00:10:10.000 +[action] Animation: Blackboard with colored pigs; a hand crosses off a third pig. Gilliam animation ends with an advertisement for Whizzo butter. + +00:10:10.000 --> 00:10:22.000 +[caption] On animation: Yes, mothers, new improved Whizzo butter containing 10% more or less is absolutely indistinguishable from a dead crab. Remember, buy Whizzo butter and go to HEAVEN! + +00:10:22.000 --> 00:10:28.000 +[action] Cut to a group of Pepperpots being interviewed. + +00:10:28.000 --> 00:10:34.000 + +I can't tell the difference between Whizzo butter and this dead crab. + +00:10:34.000 --> 00:10:44.000 + +Yes, you know, we find that nine out of ten British housewives can't tell the difference between Whizzo butter and a dead crab. + +00:10:44.000 --> 00:10:48.000 + +It's true, we can't. No. + +00:10:48.000 --> 00:10:54.000 + +Here. Here! You're on television, aren't you? + +00:10:54.000 --> 00:10:58.000 + +Yes, yes. + +00:10:58.000 --> 00:11:06.000 + +He does the thing with one of those silly women who can't tell Whizzo butter from a dead crab. + +00:11:06.000 --> 00:11:12.000 + +You try that around here, young man, and we'll slit your face. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_01__Whither_Canada_/5_It's_the_Arts.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_01__Whither_Canada_/5_It's_the_Arts.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..6d9b259f --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_01__Whither_Canada_/5_It's_the_Arts.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,66 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Segment begins at anchor #5 and includes Sir Edward Ross interview and Picasso cycling race. + +00:12:00.000 --> 00:12:06.000 +[caption] IT'S THE ARTS + +00:12:06.000 --> 00:12:12.000 +[action] Linkman sitting at desk. + +00:12:12.000 --> 00:12:22.000 + +Good evening and welcome to another edition of 'It's the Arts'. And we kick off this evening with the cinema. + +00:12:22.000 --> 00:12:30.000 +[action] Cut to Second Interviewer and Ross. + +00:12:30.000 --> 00:12:54.000 + +Good evening. One of the most prolific film directors of this age, or indeed of any age, is Sir Edward Ross, back in his native country for the first time for five years to open a season of his works at the National Film Theatre, and we are very fortunate to have him with us in this studio this evening. + +00:12:54.000 --> 00:12:58.000 + +Good evening. + +00:12:58.000 --> 00:13:40.000 + +[dialogue] Name preferences discussion: Edward, Ted, etc., escalating to 'Eddie-baby' and pet names. + +00:13:40.000 --> 00:13:48.000 + +I'm sorry, I'm sorry, but I don't like being called 'Eddie-baby'. + +00:13:48.000 --> 00:14:10.000 + +[dialogue] Argument over whether 'Eddie-baby' was said; 'sweetie', 'sugar plum', 'pussy cat', 'angel-drawers' riff. + +00:14:10.000 --> 00:14:18.000 + +(Getting up) No. I'm leaving. I'm leaving. I'm off… + +00:14:18.000 --> 00:14:24.000 + +Tell us about your latest film, Sir Edward. + +00:14:24.000 --> 00:14:40.000 + +My latest film? Well the idea, funnily enough, came from an idea I had when I first joined the industry in 1919. Of course, in those days I was only the tea boy. + +00:14:40.000 --> 00:14:44.000 + +Oh, shut up. + +00:14:44.000 --> 00:14:52.000 +[action] Cut back to Linkman. + +00:14:52.000 --> 00:15:10.000 + +Sir Edward…Ross. Now, later in the programme we will be bringing you a unique event in the world of modern art. Pablo Picasso will be doing a special painting for us, on this programme, live, on a bicycle. But right now it's time to look at a man whose meteoric rise to fame… + +00:15:10.000 --> 00:15:16.000 +[action] A pig squeals. Interviewer leaps up, grabs revolver, fires off-screen. + +00:15:16.000 --> 00:15:20.000 +[caption] PIGS 3, NELSON 1 + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_01__Whither_Canada_/6_Arthur_'Two-Sheds'_Jackson.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_01__Whither_Canada_/6_Arthur_'Two-Sheds'_Jackson.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..23bccd12 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_01__Whither_Canada_/6_Arthur_'Two-Sheds'_Jackson.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,200 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Segment begins at anchor #6. + +00:16:00.000 --> 00:16:08.000 +[action] Third Interviewer and Arthur 'Two Sheds' Jackson seated. Musical score blow-up behind. + +00:16:08.000 --> 00:16:20.000 + +Last week the Royal Festival Hall saw the first performance of a new symphony by one of the world's leading modern composers, Arthur 'Two Sheds' Jackson. Mr Jackson. + +00:16:20.000 --> 00:16:24.000 + +Good evening. + +00:16:24.000 --> 00:16:32.000 + +May I just sidetrack for one moment. Mr. Jackson, this, what shall I call it, nickname of yours. + +00:16:32.000 --> 00:16:34.000 + +Ah yes. + +00:16:34.000 --> 00:16:40.000 + +'Two sheds'. How did you come by it? + +00:16:40.000 --> 00:16:48.000 + +Well, I don't use it myself, it's just a few of my friends call me 'Two Sheds'. + +00:16:48.000 --> 00:16:54.000 + +I see, and do you in fact have two sheds? + +00:16:54.000 --> 00:17:06.000 + +No. No, I've only one shed. I've had one for some time, but a few years ago I said I was thinking of getting another one, and since then some people have called me 'Two Sheds'. + +00:17:06.000 --> 00:17:10.000 + +In spite of the fact that you only have one. + +00:17:10.000 --> 00:17:12.000 + +Yes. + +00:17:12.000 --> 00:17:18.000 + +I see, and are you thinking of purchasing a second shed? + +00:17:18.000 --> 00:17:20.000 + +No! + +00:17:20.000 --> 00:17:24.000 + +To bring you in line with your epithet? + +00:17:24.000 --> 00:17:26.000 + +No. + +00:17:26.000 --> 00:17:34.000 + +I see, I see. Well let's return to your symphony. Ah, now then, did you write this symphony… in the shed? + +00:17:34.000 --> 00:17:36.000 + +No! + +00:17:36.000 --> 00:17:42.000 + +Have you written any of your recent works in this shed of yours? + +00:17:42.000 --> 00:17:48.000 + +No it's just a perfectly ordinary garden shed. + +00:17:48.000 --> 00:17:52.000 +[action] A picture of a shed appears on the screen behind them. + +00:17:52.000 --> 00:17:58.000 + +I see. And you're thinking of buying this second shed to write in. + +00:17:58.000 --> 00:18:18.000 + +No, no. Look. This shed business, it doesn't really matter at all, the sheds aren't important. It's just a few friends call me Two Sheds and that's all there is to it. I wish you'd ask me about my music. I'm a composer. People always ask me about the sheds, they've got it out of proportion, I'm fed up with the shed, I wish I'd never got it in the first place. + +00:18:18.000 --> 00:18:22.000 + +I expect you are probably thinking of selling one. + +00:18:22.000 --> 00:18:24.000 + +I will sell one. + +00:18:24.000 --> 00:18:28.000 + +Then you'll be Arthur 'No Sheds' Jackson? + +00:18:28.000 --> 00:18:34.000 + +Look, forget about the sheds. They don't matter. + +00:18:34.000 --> 00:18:40.000 + +Mr. Jackson, I think, with respect, we ought to talk about your symphony. + +00:18:40.000 --> 00:18:42.000 + +What? + +00:18:42.000 --> 00:18:48.000 + +Apparently your symphony was written for organ and tympani. + +00:18:48.000 --> 00:18:52.000 +[action] Jackson spots the shed picture behind him. + +00:18:52.000 --> 00:18:54.000 + +What's that? + +00:18:54.000 --> 00:18:56.000 + +What's what? + +00:18:56.000 --> 00:19:00.000 + +It's a shed. Get it off. + +00:19:00.000 --> 00:19:06.000 +[action] The shed image is replaced by a picture of Jackson. He studies it. + +00:19:06.000 --> 00:19:08.000 + +Right. + +00:19:08.000 --> 00:19:12.000 + +Now then Mr. Jackson…your symphony. + +00:19:12.000 --> 00:19:18.000 +[caption] ARTHUR "TWO SHEDS" JACKSON + +00:19:18.000 --> 00:19:24.000 +[action] The picture is replaced by two sheds, one with a question mark. + +00:19:24.000 --> 00:19:30.000 + +I understand that you used to be interested in train-spotting. + +00:19:30.000 --> 00:19:32.000 + +What? + +00:19:32.000 --> 00:19:40.000 + +I understand that, about thirty years ago, you were extremely interested in train-spotting. + +00:19:40.000 --> 00:19:46.000 + +What's that got to do with my bloody music? + +00:19:46.000 --> 00:19:52.000 +[action] Enter Second Interviewer from Ross sketch. + +00:19:52.000 --> 00:19:56.000 + +Are you having any trouble from him? + +00:19:56.000 --> 00:19:58.000 + +Yes, a little. + +00:19:58.000 --> 00:20:06.000 + +Exactly. Well we interviewers are more than a match for the likes of you, 'Two Sheds'. + +00:20:06.000 --> 00:20:12.000 + +Yes, make yourself scarce, 'Two Sheds'. This studio isn't big enough for the three of us! + +00:20:12.000 --> 00:20:18.000 +[action] They push Jackson away and out of shot. + +00:20:18.000 --> 00:20:24.000 + +What are you doing? + +00:20:24.000 --> 00:20:28.000 + +Get your own Arts programme, you fairy! + +00:20:28.000 --> 00:20:32.000 + +(to camera) Arthur 'Two Sheds' Jackson. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_01__Whither_Canada_/7_Picasso_cycling_race.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_01__Whither_Canada_/7_Picasso_cycling_race.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..9a4a34b2 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_01__Whither_Canada_/7_Picasso_cycling_race.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,92 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Segment begins at anchor #7 within 'It's the Arts' programme. + +00:21:00.000 --> 00:21:20.000 + +And now for more news of the momentous artistic event in which Pablo Picasso is doing a specially commissioned painting for us whilst riding a bicycle. Pablo Picasso - the founder of modern art - without doubt the greatest abstract painter ever… for the first time painting in motion. But first of all let's have a look at the route he'll be taking. + +00:21:20.000 --> 00:21:28.000 +[action] Cut to Raymond Baxter type standing in front of a map; a cardboard cut-out of Picasso's face marks the route. + +00:21:28.000 --> 00:21:52.000 + +Well Picasso will be starting, David, at Chichester here, he'll then cycle on the A29 to Fontwell, he'll then take the A272 which will bring him on to the A3 just north of Hindhead here. From then on Pablo has a straight run on the A3 until he meets the South Circular at Battersea here. Well, this is a truly remarkable occasion as it is the first time that a modern artist of such stature has taken the A272, and it'll be very interesting to see how he copes with the heavy traffic round Wisborough Green. Vicky. + +00:21:52.000 --> 00:21:58.000 +[action] Cut to Vicky holding a bicycle. + +00:21:58.000 --> 00:22:14.000 + +Well Picasso will be riding his Viking Super Roadster with the drop handlebars and the dual-thread wheel-rims and with his Wiley-Prat 20-1 synchro-mesh he should experience difficulties on the sort of road surfaces they just don't get abroad. Mitzie. + +00:22:14.000 --> 00:22:22.000 +[action] Cut to Linkman at desk with a Viking on one side and a knight in armour on the other. + +00:22:22.000 --> 00:22:30.000 + +And now for the latest report on Picasso's progress over to Reg Moss on the Guildford by-pass. + +00:22:30.000 --> 00:22:38.000 +[action] Reg Moss stands with a hand mic by a busy road. + +00:22:38.000 --> 00:22:52.000 + +Well there's no sign of Picasso at the moment, David. But he should be through here at any moment. However I do have with me Mr Ron Geppo, British Cycling Sprint Champion and this year's winner of the Derby-Doncaster rally. + +00:22:52.000 --> 00:23:16.000 + +Well Reg, I think Pablo should be all right provided he doesn't attempt anything on the monumental scale of some of his earlier paintings, like Guernica or Mademoiselles d'Avignon or even his later War and Peace murals for the Temple of Peace chapel at Vallauris, because with this strong head wind I don't think even Doug Timpson of Manchester Harriers could paint anything on that kind of scale. + +00:23:16.000 --> 00:23:24.000 + +Well, thank you Ron. Well, there still seems to be no sign of Picasso, so I'll hand you back to the studio. + +00:23:24.000 --> 00:23:32.000 + +Well, we've just heard that Picasso is approaching the Tolworth roundabout on the A3 so come in Sam Trench at Tolworth. + +00:23:32.000 --> 00:23:38.000 +[action] Cut to Sam Trench at roadside. + +00:23:38.000 --> 00:24:06.000 + +Well something certainly is happening here at Tolworth roundabout, David. I can now see Picasso, he's cycling down very hard towards the roundabout, he's about 75-50 yards away and I can now see his painting… it's an abstract… I can see some blue some purple and some little black oval shapes… I think I can see… + +00:24:06.000 --> 00:24:12.000 + +That's not Picasso - that's Kandinsky. + +00:24:12.000 --> 00:24:40.000 + +Good lord, you're right. It's Kandinsky. Wassily Kandinsky, and who's this here with him? It's Braque. Georges Braque, the Cubist, painting a bird in flight over a cornfield and going very fast down the hill towards Kingston and… Piet Mondrian - just behind, Piet Mondrian the Neo-Plasticist, and then a gap, then the main bunch, here they come, Chagall, Max Ernst, Miro, Dufy, Ben Nicholson, Jackson Pollock and Bernard Buffet making a break on the outside here, Brancusi's going with him, so is Gericault, Ferdinand Leger, Delaunay, De Kooning, Kokoschka's dropping back here by the look of it, and so's Paul Klee dropping back a bit and, right at the back of this group, our very own Kurt Schwitters.. + +00:24:40.000 --> 00:24:44.000 + +He's German! + +00:24:44.000 --> 00:24:50.000 + +But as yet absolutely no sign of Pablo Picasso, and so from Tolworth roundabout back to the studio. + +00:24:50.000 --> 00:24:56.000 +[action] Toulouse-Lautrec pedals past on a child's tricycle. + +00:24:56.000 --> 00:25:14.000 + +Well I think I can help you there Sam, we're getting reports in from the AA that Picasso, Picasso has fallen off… he's fallen off his bicycle on the B2127 just outside Ewhurst, trying to get a short cut through to Dorking via Gomslake and Peashall. Well, Picasso is reported to be unhurt, but the pig has a slight headache. And on that note we must say goodnight to you. Picasso has failed in his first bid for international cycling fame. So from all of us here at the 'It's the Arts' studio, it's goodnight. Goodnight. + +00:25:14.000 --> 00:25:18.000 +[action] A pig's head appears over the edge of the desk; Linkman gently pushes it back. + +00:25:18.000 --> 00:25:30.000 +[action] Animation: Victorian photos; a large pig descends fatally on a portrait. Cut to wartime planning room as two officers push model pigs across a map. A private enters and salutes. + +00:25:30.000 --> 00:25:34.000 + +Dobson's bought it, sir. + +00:25:34.000 --> 00:25:38.000 + +Porker, eh? Swine. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_01__Whither_Canada_/8_The_funniest_joke_in_the_world.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_01__Whither_Canada_/8_The_funniest_joke_in_the_world.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..4ba71185 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_01__Whither_Canada_/8_The_funniest_joke_in_the_world.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,236 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Segment begins at anchor #8. + +00:26:00.000 --> 00:26:16.000 +[action] Exterior: Suburban house, zoom into upstairs window. Interior: A bent figure huddles over a table, writing, surrounded by scraps of paper. + +00:26:16.000 --> 00:26:28.000 + +This man is Ernest Scribbler… writer of jokes. In a few moments, he will have written the funniest joke in the world… and, as a consequence, he will die … laughing. + +00:26:28.000 --> 00:26:40.000 +[action] Ernest finishes writing, reads the joke; a slow smile turns to hysterical laughter; he staggers and collapses dead. + +00:26:40.000 --> 00:26:48.000 + +It was obvious that this joke was lethal… no one could read it and live … + +00:26:48.000 --> 00:27:02.000 +[action] Ernest's mother enters, weeps, picks up the paper, reads it, bursts into hysterical laughter, leaps, and dies. Cut to commentator outside the house. + +00:27:02.000 --> 00:27:16.000 + +(reverentially) This morning, shortly after eleven o'clock, comedy struck this little house in Dibley Road. Sudden … violent … comedy. Police have sealed off the area, and Scotland Yard's crack inspector is with me now. + +00:27:16.000 --> 00:27:22.000 + +I shall enter the house and attempt to remove the joke. + +00:27:22.000 --> 00:27:32.000 +[action] An upstairs window flies open; a doctor rears out, hysterical, and dies over the sill. The Inspector continues, unfazed. + +00:27:32.000 --> 00:27:48.000 + +I shall be aided by the sound of sombre music, played on gramophone records, and also by the chanting of laments by the men of Q Division. The atmosphere thus created should protect me in the eventuality of me reading the joke. + +00:27:48.000 --> 00:27:58.000 +[action] Policemen chant laments; Dead March plays. The Inspector marches into the house. + +00:27:58.000 --> 00:28:06.000 + +There goes a brave man. Whether he comes out alive or not, this will surely be remembered as one of the most courageous and gallant acts in police history. + +00:28:06.000 --> 00:28:16.000 +[action] The Inspector reappears at the door, helpless with laughter, holding the joke aloft. He collapses and dies. Cut to army vans on dark roads. + +00:28:16.000 --> 00:28:28.000 + +It was not long before the Army became interested in the military potential of the Killer Joke. Under top security, the joke was hurried to a meeting of Allied Commanders at the Ministry of War. + +00:28:28.000 --> 00:28:42.000 +[action] Dispatch rider delivers armoured box to Ham House conference. A door closes; inside, a mighty roar of laughter and thuds as commanders fall. + +00:28:42.000 --> 00:28:54.000 + +Top brass were impressed. Tests on Salisbury Plain confirmed the joke's devastating effectiveness at a range of up to fifty yards. + +00:28:54.000 --> 00:29:10.000 +[action] In a pillbox test, a weedy lance-corporal reads the joke at 50 yards; sniggers and dies. Generals observe, impressed. + +00:29:10.000 --> 00:29:12.000 + +Fantastic. + +00:29:12.000 --> 00:29:32.000 + +All through the winter of '43 we had translators working, in joke-proof conditions, to try and produce a German version of the joke. They worked on one word each for greater safety. One of them saw two words of the joke and spent several weeks in hospital. But apart from that things went pretty quickly, and we soon had the joke by January, in a form which our troops couldn't understand but which the Germans could. + +00:29:32.000 --> 00:29:42.000 +[action] Ardennes trench: Joke brigade prepares to read the joke to the enemy. + +00:29:42.000 --> 00:29:46.000 + +Tell the … joke. + +00:29:46.000 --> 00:29:56.000 + +Wenn ist das Nunstruck git und Slotermeyer? Ja! … Beiherhund das Oder die Flipperwaldt gersput! + +00:29:56.000 --> 00:30:08.000 +[action] Pan to the German trench. After a pause, a group of Germans rear up in hysterics. + +00:30:08.000 --> 00:30:18.000 + +It was a fantastic success. Over sixty thousand times as powerful as Britain's great pre-war joke … + +00:30:18.000 --> 00:30:24.000 +[action] Chamberlain brandishes 'Peace in our time' paper. + +00:30:24.000 --> 00:30:30.000 + +…and one which Hitler just couldn't match. + +00:30:30.000 --> 00:30:44.000 +[caption] Hitler rally subtitled: 'MY DOG'S GOT NO NOSE' / Soldier: 'HOW DOES HE SMELL?' / Hitler: 'AWFUL' + +00:30:44.000 --> 00:30:50.000 + +In action it was deadly. + +00:30:50.000 --> 00:31:02.000 +[action] A squad moves through a forest; a member signals, reads the joke from cover. + +00:31:02.000 --> 00:31:10.000 + +Wenn ist das Nunstruck git und Slotermeyer? Ja! .. Beiherhund das Oder die Flipperwaldt gersput! + +00:31:10.000 --> 00:31:14.000 +[action] A sniper falls laughing out of a tree. + +00:31:14.000 --> 00:31:24.000 + +(charging) Wenn ist das Nunstruck git und Slotermeyer? Ja! … Beiherhund das Oder die Flipperwaldt gersput. + +00:31:24.000 --> 00:31:30.000 +[action] Germans flee laughing; some drop to the ground. + +00:31:30.000 --> 00:31:36.000 + +The German casualties were appalling. + +00:31:36.000 --> 00:31:48.000 +[action] German hospital ward full of casualties still laughing hysterically. Cut to Nazi interrogation room. + +00:31:48.000 --> 00:31:52.000 + +Vott is the big joke? + +00:31:52.000 --> 00:31:58.000 + +I can only give you name, rank, and why did the chicken cross the road? + +00:31:58.000 --> 00:32:04.000 + +That's not funny! [action] Slaps him. I vant to know the joke. + +00:32:04.000 --> 00:32:10.000 + +All right. How do you make a Nazi cross? + +00:32:10.000 --> 00:32:16.000 + +[action] Momentarily fooled: I don't know … how do you make a Nazi cross? + +00:32:16.000 --> 00:32:22.000 + +Tread on his corns. [action] He does so; Nazi hops in pain. + +00:32:22.000 --> 00:32:30.000 + +Gott in Himmel! That's not funny! [action] Mimes cuffing while another Nazi claps hands for sound. Now if you don't tell me the joke, I shall hit you properly. + +00:32:30.000 --> 00:32:34.000 + +I can stand physical pain, you know. + +00:32:34.000 --> 00:32:38.000 + +Ah … you're no fun. All right, Otto. + +00:32:38.000 --> 00:32:44.000 +[action] Otto starts tickling the officer; he laughs. + +00:32:44.000 --> 00:32:48.000 + +Oh no - anything but that please no, all right I'll tell you. + +00:32:48.000 --> 00:32:52.000 + +Quick Otto. The typewriter. + +00:32:52.000 --> 00:33:00.000 +[action] Otto readies the typewriter. The officer produces a paper and reads. + +00:33:00.000 --> 00:33:06.000 + +Wenn ist das Nunstruck git und Slotermeyer? Ja! … Beiherhund das Oder die Flipperwaldt gersput. + +00:33:06.000 --> 00:33:12.000 +[action] Otto explodes with laughter and dies. + +00:33:12.000 --> 00:33:16.000 + +Ach! Zat iss not funny! + +00:33:16.000 --> 00:33:20.000 +[action] He bursts into laughter and dies. A guard bursts in with a machine gun; the British officer leaps onto a table. + +00:33:20.000 --> 00:33:26.000 + +(lightning speed) Wenn ist das Nunstruck git und Slotermeyer? Ja! … Beiherhund das Oder die Flipperwaldt gersput. + +00:33:26.000 --> 00:33:32.000 +[action] The guard reels back and collapses laughing; officer escapes. Cut to stock footage of German scientists. + +00:33:32.000 --> 00:33:42.000 + +But at Peenemunde in the Autumn of '44, the Germans were working on a joke of their own. + +00:33:42.000 --> 00:33:54.000 +[action] Interior: German general at desk; Otto stands behind. A bespectacled scientist/joke writer enters, clears throat, and reads from a card. + +00:33:54.000 --> 00:34:06.000 + +Die ist ein Kinnerhunder und zwei Mackel über und der bitte schön ist den Wunderhaus sprechensie. 'Nein' sprecht der Herren 'Ist aufern borger mit zveitingen'. + +00:34:06.000 --> 00:34:10.000 + +We let you know. + +00:34:10.000 --> 00:34:14.000 +[action] Otto shoots the joker. More stock footage of German scientists. + +00:34:14.000 --> 00:34:24.000 + +But by December their joke was ready, and Hitler gave the order for the German V-Joke to be broadcast in English. + +00:34:24.000 --> 00:34:34.000 +[action] 1940s radio; a couple listen anxiously. + +00:34:34.000 --> 00:34:44.000 +[caption] (crackly German voice) Der ver zwei peanuts, valking down der strasse, and von vas… assaulted! peanut. Ho-ho-ho-ho. + +00:34:44.000 --> 00:34:50.000 +[action] Radio bursts into 'Deutschland Über Alles'. The couple stare blankly at the radio. + +00:34:50.000 --> 00:35:04.000 + +In 1945 Peace broke out. It was the end of the Joke. Joke warfare was banned at a special session of the Geneva Convention, and in 1950 the last remaining copy of the joke was laid to rest here in the Berkshire countryside, never to be told again. + +00:35:04.000 --> 00:35:18.000 +[action] He walks away revealing a monument: 'To the unknown Joke'. Camera pulls away through idyllic setting as patriotic music crescendos. Cut to football referee who blows a whistle. Silence. Blank screen. + +00:35:18.000 --> 00:35:22.000 +[caption] THE END + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_02__Sex_and_violence/0_Episode2_head_tail.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_02__Sex_and_violence/0_Episode2_head_tail.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..784e6065 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_02__Sex_and_violence/0_Episode2_head_tail.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,34 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Intro titles, opening man run, series title, interstitial captions, and closing credits. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:05.000 +[action] A man appears on a distant sand dune, looks toward camera, and runs. + +00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:10.000 +[action] He dips out of sight; sound becomes prison corridor footsteps and a heavy door clanging. + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:14.000 + +It's… + +00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:18.000 + +Monty Python's Flying Circus. + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:26.000 +[action] Strange images, possibly connected with stretching owls, proceed from a bizarre American immigrant's fevered brain. + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:30.000 +[caption] PART 2 + +00:00:30.000 --> 00:00:34.000 +[caption] SHEEP + +00:29:30.000 --> 00:29:35.000 +[caption] SEX AND VIOLENCE was conceived, written and performed by: (credits) + +00:29:35.000 --> 00:29:40.000 + +And here is the result of the Epilogue: God exists by two falls to a submission. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_02__Sex_and_violence/10_The_wrestling_epilogue.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_02__Sex_and_violence/10_The_wrestling_epilogue.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..11bcdb7c --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_02__Sex_and_violence/10_The_wrestling_epilogue.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,35 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit begins at anchor #10. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 +[caption] THE EPILOGUE, A QUESTION OF BELIEF + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:09.000 +[action] Interviewer flanked by a monsignor and an old Don figure. + +00:00:09.000 --> 00:00:20.000 + +Good evening, and welcome once again to the Epilogue… instead of discussing God's existence, they have decided to fight for it… determined by two falls, two submissions, or a knockout… Your master of ceremonies—Mr Arthur Waring. + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:22.000 +[action] Participants move into a wrestling ring. + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:34.000 + +Good evening ladies and gentlemen and welcome… Appearing for Jehovah—the ever popular Monsignor Eddie Gay. [crowd boos] And in the red corner… Dr Tom Jack! [cheers] [caption] Gong. + +00:00:34.000 --> 00:00:36.000 +[caption] ROUND 1 + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:42.000 +[action] Real wrestlers throw each other about. + +00:00:42.000 --> 00:00:50.000 + +Now Dr Jack's got a flying mare there… full body slam… he's laying it in… standing back… We'll leave the Epilogue for the moment and bring you the result later. + +00:00:50.000 --> 00:00:53.000 + +Oh my God! [action] Pulls out a revolver and shoots off-screen. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_02__Sex_and_violence/11_The_mouse_problem.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_02__Sex_and_violence/11_The_mouse_problem.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..60a77cd7 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_02__Sex_and_violence/11_The_mouse_problem.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,231 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit begins at anchor #11. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 +[caption] THE WORLD AROUND US + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:08.000 +[action] Newspaper headlines: Pop Stars In Mouse Scandal; Peer Faces Rodent Charges. Mouse-costumed man runs into police station. + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:10.000 +[caption] THE MOUSE PROBLEM + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:14.000 +[action] Photo: Mouse Clubs On Increase; neon signs: Eek Eek Club; Little White Rodent Room; Caerphilly A Go-Go. + +00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:19.000 + +Yes. The Mouse Problem. This week 'The World Around Us' looks at Mice and Men. What makes a man want to be a mouse. + +00:00:19.000 --> 00:00:22.000 +[action] Interviewer faces confessor in shadow. + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:29.000 + +[slowly, painfully] Well it's not a question of wanting to be a mouse… it just sort of happens to you… + +00:00:29.000 --> 00:00:31.000 + +And when did you first notice these… shall we say… tendencies? + +00:00:31.000 --> 00:00:38.000 + +About seventeen… at a party… had a lot to drink… fellows started handing cheese around… I tried a bit… and that was that. + +00:00:38.000 --> 00:00:40.000 + +And what else did these fellows do? + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:44.000 + +Some started dressing up as mice… then, in costume, they started squeaking. + +00:00:44.000 --> 00:00:45.500 + +Yes. And was that all? + +00:00:45.500 --> 00:00:47.000 + +That was all. + +00:00:47.000 --> 00:00:49.000 + +And what was your reaction to this? + +00:00:49.000 --> 00:00:52.000 + +I was shocked. But, gradually, I felt more at ease with other mice. + +00:00:52.000 --> 00:00:54.000 +[action] Cut to linkman. + +00:00:54.000 --> 00:00:57.000 + +A typical case, whom we shall refer to as Mr A, although his real name is this: + +00:00:57.000 --> 00:01:02.000 +[caption] ARTHUR JACKSON; 32A MILTON AVENUE; HOUNSLOW, MIDDLESEX. + +00:01:02.000 --> 00:01:05.000 + +What attracts someone like Mr A to this way of life? I have with me a consultant psychiatrist. + +00:01:05.000 --> 00:01:08.000 +[action] Reveal psychiatrist; he places a notice: 'The Amazing Kargol And Janet'. + +00:01:08.000 --> 00:01:12.000 + +We’ve heard a typical case. I have over seven hundred similar histories, fully documented. Would you care to choose one? + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:15.000 +[action] Janet (Carol Cleveland) enters in showgirl outfit, offers case histories like cards; linkman picks one. + +00:01:15.000 --> 00:01:17.500 + +Mr Arthur Aldridge of Leamington. + +00:01:17.500 --> 00:01:21.000 + +Well, that's amazing, amazing. Thank you, Janet. [action] Chord; Janet postures and exits. Kargol, speaking as a psychiatrist as opposed to a conjuror… + +00:01:21.000 --> 00:01:22.500 + +Oh… + +00:01:22.500 --> 00:01:26.000 + +…what makes certain men want to be mice? + +00:01:26.000 --> 00:01:36.000 + +Over 8% of the population will always be mice… there's something of the mouse in all of us… how many of us haven't felt sexually attracted to mice? I know I have. + +00:01:36.000 --> 00:01:44.000 + +Illegality attracts some—like murder—give it mystique. Look at arson—who hasn't set fire to a great public building? I know I have. [action] Phone rings; linkman doesn't answer. + +00:01:44.000 --> 00:01:47.000 + +The only way to bring crime figures down is to reduce offences—get it out in the open—I know I have. + +00:01:47.000 --> 00:01:51.000 + +The Amazing Kargol And Janet. What a lot of people don't realize is that a mouse, once accepted, can fulfil a very useful role in society… famous men known to have been mice… + +00:01:51.000 --> 00:01:56.000 +[action] Julius Caesar on beach: 'Veni Vidi, Vici' plus furtive squeak. Napoleon eats cheese from jacket. + +00:01:56.000 --> 00:01:58.000 + +And, of course, Hillaire Belloc. But what is the attitude… + +00:01:58.000 --> 00:02:00.500 + +… of the man in the street towards… + +00:02:00.500 --> 00:02:02.000 + +… this growing social problem? + +00:02:02.000 --> 00:02:03.500 +[action] Vox pops films. + +00:02:03.500 --> 00:02:05.000 + +Clamp down on them. + +00:02:05.000 --> 00:02:06.000 + +How? + +00:02:06.000 --> 00:02:07.500 + +I'd strangle them. + +00:02:07.500 --> 00:02:11.000 + +Speaking as a member of the Stock Exchange I would suck their brains out with a straw, sell the widows and orphans and go into South American Zinc. + +00:02:11.000 --> 00:02:15.000 + +Yeh I'd, er, stuff sparrows down their throats, er, until the beaks stuck out through the, er, stomach walls. + +00:02:15.000 --> 00:02:18.000 + +Oh well I'm a chartered accountant, and consequently too boring to be of interest. + +00:02:18.000 --> 00:02:21.000 + +I feel that these poor unfortunate people should be free to live the lives of their own choice. + +00:02:21.000 --> 00:02:23.500 + +I'd split their nostrils open with a boat hook, I think. + +00:02:23.500 --> 00:02:26.000 + +They can't help it, can they? But there's nothing you can do. So I'd kill 'em. + +00:02:26.000 --> 00:02:28.000 + +Clearly the British public's view is a hostile one. + +00:02:28.000 --> 00:02:29.500 +[caption] HOSTILE + +00:02:29.500 --> 00:02:34.000 + +But perhaps this is because so little is generally known of these mice men. We have some film now of a notorious weekend mouse party… + +00:02:34.000 --> 00:02:38.000 +[action] Exterior house at night; blinds show shadowy enormous mice with cheese, squeaking. + +00:02:38.000 --> 00:02:40.000 + +Mr A tells us what actually goes on at these mouse parties. + +00:02:40.000 --> 00:02:45.000 + +First you get shown to your private hole in the skirting board… put the mouse skin on… scurry into the main room… maybe take a run in the wheel. + +00:02:45.000 --> 00:02:49.000 + +The remainder was filmed secretly by a BBC cameraman posing as a vole. We apologize for the poor quality. + +00:02:49.000 --> 00:02:53.000 +[action] Very poor quality film; shadowy shapes; odd mouse glimpsed. + +00:02:53.000 --> 00:02:58.000 + +Then you steal some cheese—Brie, Camembert, Cheddar or Gouda if you're on the harder stuff. You might watch blue cheese films… + +00:02:58.000 --> 00:03:03.000 + +There's a big clock in the middle; about 12:50 you climb it… eventually it strikes one… and you all run down. + +00:03:03.000 --> 00:03:05.000 +[action] Large matron with apron and carving knife. + +00:03:05.000 --> 00:03:06.500 + +And what's that? + +00:03:06.500 --> 00:03:08.000 + +That's the farmer's wife. + +00:03:08.000 --> 00:03:10.000 +[action] Back to linkman at desk. + +00:03:10.000 --> 00:03:15.000 + +Perhaps we need to know more of these mice men before we can judge them. Perhaps not. Anyway, our thirty minutes are up. + +00:03:15.000 --> 00:03:19.000 +[caption] Baa-ing heard. Linkman looks up, startled; pulls gun and fires upward; sheep falls to floor. + +00:03:19.000 --> 00:03:21.000 + +Goodnight. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_02__Sex_and_violence/1_Flying_Sheep.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_02__Sex_and_violence/1_Flying_Sheep.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..be87e5b0 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_02__Sex_and_violence/1_Flying_Sheep.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,107 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit begins at anchor #1. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 +[action] Country gate overlooking a field. Rustic leans on gate; off-screen baa-ing throughout. + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:06.000 + +Good afternoon. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:07.500 + +Afternoon. + +00:00:07.500 --> 00:00:10.000 + +A lovely day isn't it. + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:11.500 + +Eh, 'tis that. + +00:00:11.500 --> 00:00:14.000 + +You here on holiday or…? + +00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:16.000 + +Nope, I live 'ere. + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:20.000 + +Oh, jolly good too. [action] Surveys field, puzzled. I say, those are sheep aren't they? + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:21.000 + +Ar. + +00:00:21.000 --> 00:00:25.000 + +Yes, yes of course, I thought so… only… er why are they up in the trees? + +00:00:25.000 --> 00:00:31.000 + +A fair question and one that in recent weeks has been much on my mind. It's my considered opinion that they're nesting. + +00:00:31.000 --> 00:00:32.500 + +Nesting? + +00:00:32.500 --> 00:00:33.500 + +Ar. + +00:00:33.500 --> 00:00:35.000 + +Like birds? + +00:00:35.000 --> 00:00:36.000 + +Ar. Exactly. Birds is the key to the whole problem. + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:44.000 + +Observe their behavior. Take for a start the sheeps' tendency to 'op about the field on their back legs. [caption] (off-screen baa-ing) + +00:00:44.000 --> 00:00:50.000 + +Now witness their attempts to fly from tree to tree. Notice that they do not so much fly as… plummet. [caption] (sound of sheep plummeting) + +00:00:50.000 --> 00:00:59.000 + +Observe for example that ewe in that oak tree. She is clearly trying to teach her lamb to fly. [caption] (baaaaaa… thump) Talk about the blind leading the blind. + +00:00:59.000 --> 00:01:02.000 + +But why do they think they're birds? + +00:01:02.000 --> 00:01:10.000 + +Another fair question. One thing is for sure; a sheep is not a creature of the air. They have enormous difficulty in the comparatively simple act of perchin'. [caption] (crash) As you see. + +00:01:10.000 --> 00:01:16.000 + +As for flight, its body is totally unadapted to the problems of aviation. Trouble is, sheep are very dim. Once they get an idea in their heads, there's no shifting it. + +00:01:16.000 --> 00:01:19.000 + +But where did they get the idea from? + +00:01:19.000 --> 00:01:28.000 + +From Harold. He's that sheep there over under the elm. He's that most dangerous of animals, a clever sheep. He's the ring-leader. + +00:01:28.000 --> 00:01:36.000 + +He has realized that a sheep's life consists of standing around for a few months and then being eaten. And that's a depressing prospect for an ambitious sheep. He's patently hit on the idea of escape. + +00:01:36.000 --> 00:01:39.000 + +Well why don't you just get rid of Harold? + +00:01:39.000 --> 00:01:43.000 + +Because of the enormous commercial possibilities should he succeed. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_02__Sex_and_violence/2_French_lecture_on_sheep-aircraft.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_02__Sex_and_violence/2_French_lecture_on_sheep-aircraft.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..f1730efc --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_02__Sex_and_violence/2_French_lecture_on_sheep-aircraft.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,98 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit begins at anchor #2. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 +[action] Two Frenchmen stand before diagram of a sheep adapted for flying; rapid French, some pseudo. + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:12.000 + +Bonsoir - ici nous avons les diagrammes modernes d'un mouton anglo-français … maintenant … baa-aa, baa-aa… nous avons, dans la tête, le cabinc. Ici, on se trouve le petit capitaine Anglais, Monsieur Trubshawe. + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:14.500 + +Vive Brian, wherever you are. + +00:00:14.500 --> 00:00:20.000 + +D'accord, d'accord. Maintenant, je vous présente mon collègue, le pouf célèbre, Jean-Brian Zatapathique. + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:23.000 +[action] Transfers his moustache to Second Frenchman. + +00:00:23.000 --> 00:00:26.000 + +Maintenant, le mouton … le landing … les wheels, bon. + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:28.500 +[action] Opens diagram to show wheels on sheep's legs. + +00:00:28.500 --> 00:00:30.500 + +Bon, les wheels, ici. + +00:00:30.500 --> 00:00:35.000 + +C'est formidable, n'est ce pas … [action] (unintelligibly indicates motor at rear of sheep) + +00:00:35.000 --> 00:00:38.000 + +Les voyageurs … les bagages … ils sont … ici! + +00:00:38.000 --> 00:00:42.000 +[action] Triumphantly reveal arrangement; they run around flapping arms and baa-ing. + +00:00:42.000 --> 00:00:46.000 +[action] Cut to pepperpots in supermarket; off-screen interviewer. + +00:00:46.000 --> 00:00:48.500 + +Oh yes, we get a lot of French people round here. + +00:00:48.000 --> 00:00:50.000 + +Ooh Yes. + +00:00:50.000 --> 00:00:51.500 + +All over yes. + +00:00:51.500 --> 00:00:54.000 + +And how do you get on with these French people? + +00:00:54.000 --> 00:00:55.500 + +Oh very well. + +00:00:55.500 --> 00:00:57.500 + +So do I. + +00:00:57.500 --> 00:00:59.000 + +Me too. + +00:00:59.000 --> 00:01:03.000 + +Oh yes I like them. I mean, they think well don't they? I mean, be fair - Pascal. + +00:01:03.000 --> 00:01:04.500 + +Blaise Pascal. + +00:01:04.500 --> 00:01:06.000 + +Jean-Paul Sartre. + +00:01:06.000 --> 00:01:07.500 + +Yes, Voltaire. + +00:01:07.500 --> 00:01:10.000 + +Ooh! - René Descartes. + +00:01:10.000 --> 00:01:15.000 +[action] Descartes thinking with 'I THINK THEREFORE I AM' thought bubble; a hand pricks bubble; both vanish. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_02__Sex_and_violence/3_A_man_with_three_buttocks.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_02__Sex_and_violence/3_A_man_with_three_buttocks.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..dc387160 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_02__Sex_and_violence/3_A_man_with_three_buttocks.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,141 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit begins at anchor #3. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:03.000 + +And now for something completely different. A man with three buttocks! + +00:00:03.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Interview studio: Interviewer with Arthur Frampton. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:13.000 + +Good evening, I have with me, Mr Arthur Frampton, who has… Mr. Frampton, I understand that you… er… as it were… have er… well, let me put it another way… I believe Mr. Frampton that whereas most people have - er - two… two… you… you + +00:00:13.000 --> 00:00:14.500 + +I'm sorry. + +00:00:14.500 --> 00:00:17.000 + +Ah yes, yes I see… Um, Are you quite comfortable? + +00:00:17.000 --> 00:00:18.500 + +Yes fine, thank you. + +00:00:18.500 --> 00:00:22.000 + +[action] Quick glance at Frampton's bottom. Er, Mr Frampton… vis-à-vis… your… rump. + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:23.500 + +I beg your pardon? + +00:00:23.500 --> 00:00:25.000 + +Er, your rump. + +00:00:25.000 --> 00:00:26.000 + +What? + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:28.500 + +Your posterior… derriere… sit upon. + +00:00:28.500 --> 00:00:30.000 + +What's that? + +00:00:30.000 --> 00:00:31.000 + +[whispers] …Buttocks. + +00:00:31.000 --> 00:00:32.500 + +Oh, me bum! + +00:00:32.500 --> 00:00:37.000 + +Sshhh! Well Mr. Frampton I understand Mr Frampton, you have a… 50% bonus in the… in the region of what you said. + +00:00:37.000 --> 00:00:38.500 + +I got three cheeks. + +00:00:38.500 --> 00:00:43.000 + +Yes, yes, Splendid, splendid. Well… we were wondering, Mr Frampton, if you… could… see your way clear… + +00:00:43.000 --> 00:00:46.000 + +[action] Seeing a camera move behind him. Here? What's that camera doing? + +00:00:46.000 --> 00:00:52.000 + +Er, nothing, nothing at all, sir. We were wondering if you could see your way clear… to giving us… a quick… a quick… visual… Mr Frampton, will you take your trousers down? + +00:00:52.000 --> 00:00:56.000 + +What? [action] Slaps away a hand off-screen. 'Ere, get off! I'm not taking me trousers down on television. Who do you think I am? + +00:00:56.000 --> 00:00:57.500 + +Please take them down. + +00:00:57.500 --> 00:00:58.500 + +No. + +00:00:58.500 --> 00:01:00.000 + +Just a little bit. + +00:01:00.000 --> 00:01:01.000 + +No. + +00:01:01.000 --> 00:01:10.000 + +Now look here Mr Frampton… It's perfectly easy for somebody just to come along here to the BBC simply claiming that they have a bit to spare in the botty department… but the point is Mr. Frampton… our viewers need proof. + +00:01:10.000 --> 00:01:14.000 + +I've been on Persian Radio… Get off! Arthur Figgis knows I've got three buttocks. + +00:01:14.000 --> 00:01:15.500 + +How? + +00:01:15.500 --> 00:01:17.500 + +We go cycling together. + +00:01:17.500 --> 00:01:21.000 +[action] Cut to tandem riders; rear rider looks down, up, exclaims 'strewth'. + +00:01:21.000 --> 00:01:23.500 + +And now for something completely different. A man with three buttocks. + +00:01:23.500 --> 00:01:26.000 +[action] Interview studio again. + +00:01:26.000 --> 00:01:33.000 + +Good evening, I have with me, Mr Arthur Frampton, who… Mr. Frampton - I understand that you, as it were… well, let me put it another way… I believe Mr. Frampton that whereas most people… didn't we do this just now? + +00:01:33.000 --> 00:01:34.500 + +Er… yes. + +00:01:34.500 --> 00:01:36.500 + +Well why didn't you say so? + +00:01:36.500 --> 00:01:39.000 + +I thought it was the continental version. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_02__Sex_and_violence/4_A_man_with_two_noses.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_02__Sex_and_violence/4_A_man_with_two_noses.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..80e39ea4 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_02__Sex_and_violence/4_A_man_with_two_noses.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,19 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit begins at anchor #4. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 + +And now for something completely the same - a man with three buttocks. [action] Phone rings; answers. 'Hullo? …Oh, did we.' [action] Puts phone down. And now for something completely different. A man with three noses. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:08.000 + +He's not here yet! + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:10.000 + +Two noses? + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:16.000 +[action] Women's Institute audience applauds. A man flourishes handkerchief, blows nose; then hides hanky in shirt and blows again from the elbow. Audience applauds again. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_02__Sex_and_violence/5_Musical_mice.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_02__Sex_and_violence/5_Musical_mice.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..fab98125 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_02__Sex_and_violence/5_Musical_mice.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,25 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit begins at anchor #5. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:08.000 + +Ladies and gentlemen isn't she just great eh, wasn't she just great… Seriously now, ladies and gentlemen, we have for you one of the most unique acts in the world today… my very great privilege to introduce Arthur Ewing, and his musical mice. + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:09.500 +[action] Cut to Ewing. + +00:00:09.500 --> 00:00:20.000 + +Thank you, thank you… I have in this box twenty-three white mice… trained to squeak at selected pitch. [action] Raises mouse by tail. This is E sharp… and this one is G. + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:27.000 + +Now these mice are arranged upon this rack, that when played in the correct order they will squeak 'The Bells of St Mary's'. Ladies and gentlemen, on the mouse organ: 'The Bells of St Mary's'. + +00:00:27.000 --> 00:00:35.000 +[action] Produces two mallets; strikes mice while quietly singing. Each stroke: squashing sound and expiring squeak. Audience shouts: 'Stop it!' 'Oh my God!' + +00:00:35.000 --> 00:00:38.000 +[action] Ewing bows cheerfully; floor manager hauls him off. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_02__Sex_and_violence/6_Marriage_guidance_counsellor.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_02__Sex_and_violence/6_Marriage_guidance_counsellor.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..1f122dde --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_02__Sex_and_violence/6_Marriage_guidance_counsellor.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,148 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit begins at anchor #6. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:03.000 +[caption] Marriage Counsellor + +00:00:03.000 --> 00:00:05.000 + +Next! + +00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:08.000 +[action] A little man enters with a beautiful blonde (Carol Cleveland). + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:10.000 + +Are you the marriage guidance counsellor? + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:11.500 + +Yes. Good morning. + +00:00:11.500 --> 00:00:13.000 + +Good morning, sir. + +00:00:13.000 --> 00:00:18.000 + +[action] Stares at wife, fascinated; shakes it off. Name? + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:20.000 + +Mr and Mrs Arthur Pewtey, Pewtey. + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:28.000 + +[action] Writes without looking, still staring at wife. And what is the name of your ravishing wife? Wait. Don't tell me… + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:30.000 + +It's Deirdre. + +00:00:30.000 --> 00:00:35.000 + +Deirdre. What a beautiful name… [action] Lightly brushes wife's cheek. And what seems to be the trouble with your marriage, Mr Pewtey? + +00:00:35.000 --> 00:00:48.000 + +Well, it all started about five years ago when we started going on holiday to Brighton together… [action] Counsellor and wife are not listening, fascinated by each other. + +00:00:48.000 --> 00:00:49.500 + +Do go on. + +00:00:49.500 --> 00:01:10.000 + +We've always been good friends… accounts twice a month… [action] Counsellor's face is fantastically close to wife's. + +00:01:10.000 --> 00:01:12.500 + +You suspected your wife? + +00:01:12.500 --> 00:01:18.000 + +Well yes—at first, frankly yes. [action] Counsellor points wife to a screen; she goes behind it. + +00:01:18.000 --> 00:01:19.500 + +Odd? + +00:01:19.500 --> 00:01:24.000 + +Yes, well, I mean to a certain extent yes… + +00:01:24.000 --> 00:01:26.000 +[action] A piece of wife's clothing comes over the screen. + +00:01:26.000 --> 00:01:27.500 + +Yes I certainly do. + +00:01:27.500 --> 00:01:29.500 +[action] Wife's bra and panties come over the screen. + +00:01:29.500 --> 00:01:33.000 + +…people in fact know me extremely well… + +00:01:33.000 --> 00:01:35.000 + +Oh yes. Would you hold this. + +00:01:35.000 --> 00:01:40.000 +[action] Man helps him; counsellor continues to undress. + +00:01:40.000 --> 00:01:44.000 + +Er, look would you mind running along for ten minutes? Make it half an hour. + +00:01:44.000 --> 00:01:51.000 + +No, no, right-ho… I'll wait outside… You've certainly put my mind at rest on one or two points. + +00:01:51.000 --> 00:01:54.000 +[action] Exits; deep Southern American voice halts him. + +00:01:54.000 --> 00:01:59.000 + +Now wait there stranger. A man can run and run for year after year until he realizes that what he's running from… is hisself. + +00:01:59.000 --> 00:02:00.500 + +Gosh. + +00:02:00.500 --> 00:02:06.000 + +A man's got to do what a man's got to do… turn, fight, hold your head up high. + +00:02:06.000 --> 00:02:07.500 + +Yes! + +00:02:07.500 --> 00:02:10.000 + +Now you go back in there my son and be a man. Walk tall. + +00:02:10.000 --> 00:02:18.000 + +[action] Man steels himself; opens door determinedly. All right, Deirdre, come out of there. + +00:02:18.000 --> 00:02:19.500 + +Go away. + +00:02:19.000 --> 00:02:22.000 + +Right. Right. + +00:02:22.000 --> 00:02:24.000 +[action] A man in a suit of armour hits him with a chicken. + +00:02:24.000 --> 00:02:26.000 +[caption] SO MUCH FOR PATHOS + +00:02:26.000 --> 00:02:28.000 + +So much for pathos. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_02__Sex_and_violence/7_The_wacky_queen.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_02__Sex_and_violence/7_The_wacky_queen.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..0815ea75 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_02__Sex_and_violence/7_The_wacky_queen.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,24 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit begins at anchor #7. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:05.000 +[caption] Film leader: 9…8…7…6…31…6…Jimmy Greaves…4…3… + +00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:10.000 +[action] Victorian-texture film: Queen Victoria and Gladstone walk on lawn at Osborne. + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:20.000 + +These historic pictures of Queen Victoria… commentary recorded on earliest wax cylinders… spoken by Alfred Lord Tennyson, the Poet Laureate. + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:40.000 + +Well hello, it's the wacky Queen again! And who's the other fella? It's Willie Gladstone! [action] Queen nudges and chucks Gladstone; hosepipe antics; gardener kicked; Gladstone sprayed. + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:55.000 +[action] Queen runs; later paints fence; daubs Gladstone; he pours bucket on her; she kicks him; he falls through fence. + +00:00:55.000 --> 00:01:02.000 +[action] Tea on lawn; Queen pies Gladstone; freeze-frame; pull back to photo on mantel in a working-class sitting room. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_02__Sex_and_violence/8_Working-class_playwright.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_02__Sex_and_violence/8_Working-class_playwright.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..e758ea51 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_02__Sex_and_violence/8_Working-class_playwright.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,202 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit begins at anchor #8. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 +[action] Sitting room like D. H. Lawrence; Mum ushers in Ken. + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:07.000 + +Oh dad… look who's come to see us… it's our Ken. + +00:00:07.000 --> 00:00:11.000 + +Aye, and about bloody time if you ask me. + +00:00:11.000 --> 00:00:13.000 + +Aren't you pleased to see me, father? + +00:00:13.000 --> 00:00:16.000 + +Of course he's pleased to see you, Ken… + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:22.000 + +All right, woman… I'll do the talkin'. [action] Looks at Ken distastefully. I like yer fancy suit. Is that what they're wearing up in Yorkshire now? + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:24.500 + +It's just an ordinary suit, father… it's all I've got apart from the overalls. + +00:00:24.500 --> 00:00:27.500 +[action] Dad turns away with scornful disgust. + +00:00:27.500 --> 00:00:30.000 + +How are you liking it down the mine, Ken? + +00:00:30.000 --> 00:00:34.000 + +Oh it's not too bad, mum… we're using new tungsten carbide drills for preliminary coal-face scouring. + +00:00:34.000 --> 00:00:35.500 + +Oh that sounds nice, dear… + +00:00:35.500 --> 00:00:38.000 + +Tungsten carbide drills! What the bloody hell's tungsten carbide drills? + +00:00:38.000 --> 00:00:40.000 + +It's something they use in coal-mining, father. + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:44.000 + +[mimicking] 'It's something they use in coal-mining, father'. You're all bloody fancy talk since you left London. + +00:00:44.000 --> 00:00:45.500 + +Oh not that again. + +00:00:45.500 --> 00:00:48.500 + +He's had a hard day dear… his new play opens at the National Theatre tomorrow. + +00:00:48.500 --> 00:00:50.000 + +Oh that's good. + +00:00:50.000 --> 00:00:58.000 + +Good!? What do you know about it? Getting up at five to fly to Paris… Old Vic at twelve… press interviews all day… and back to wrestle with a homosexual nymphomaniac drug-addict murdering a Scottish footballer! + +00:00:58.000 --> 00:01:00.000 + +Oh, don't shout at the boy, father. + +00:01:00.000 --> 00:01:05.000 + +Hampstead wasn't good enough for you… you had to go poncing off to Barnsley, you and yer coal-mining friends. [action] Spits. + +00:01:05.000 --> 00:01:08.000 + +Coal-mining is a wonderful thing father, but it's something you'll never understand. Just look at you! + +00:01:08.000 --> 00:01:09.500 + +Oh Ken! Be careful! You know what he's like after a few novels. + +00:01:09.000 --> 00:01:12.000 + +Oh come on lad! Out wi' it! What's wrong wi' me?… yet tit! + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:16.000 + +Your head's addled with novels and poems; you come home reeking of Chateau La Tour… + +00:01:16.000 --> 00:01:17.500 + +Oh don't, don't. + +00:01:17.000 --> 00:01:22.000 + +And look what you've done to mother! Worn out with film stars, premieres, and gala luncheons… + +00:01:22.000 --> 00:01:24.500 + +There's nowt wrong wi' gala luncheons, lad! I've had more gala luncheons than you've had hot dinners! + +00:01:24.500 --> 00:01:26.000 + +Oh please! + +00:01:26.000 --> 00:01:28.000 +[action] Dad clutches hands and sinks to knees. + +00:01:28.000 --> 00:01:29.500 + +Oh no! + +00:01:29.500 --> 00:01:31.000 + +What is it? + +00:01:31.000 --> 00:01:33.000 + +Oh, it's his writer's cramp! + +00:01:33.000 --> 00:01:35.000 + +You never told me about this… + +00:01:35.000 --> 00:01:36.500 + +No, we didn't like to, Kenny. + +00:01:36.500 --> 00:01:39.000 + +I'm all right! I'm all right, woman. Just get him out of here. + +00:01:39.000 --> 00:01:41.000 + +Oh Ken! You'd better go… + +00:01:41.000 --> 00:01:42.500 + +All right. I'm going. + +00:01:42.500 --> 00:01:44.000 + +After all we've done for him… + +00:01:44.000 --> 00:01:47.000 + +[action] At the door. One day you'll realize there's more to life than culture… There's dirt, smoke, and good honest sweat! + +00:01:47.000 --> 00:01:49.000 + +Get out! Get out! Get OUT! You… LABOURER! + +00:01:49.000 --> 00:01:52.000 +[action] Ken exits; shocked silence. Dad uncovers typewriter. + +00:01:52.000 --> 00:01:54.500 + +Hey, you know, mother, I think there's a play there… get t'agent on t'phone. + +00:01:54.500 --> 00:01:58.000 + +Aye I think you're right, Frank, it could express a vital theme of our age… + +00:01:58.000 --> 00:02:00.000 + +Aye. + +00:02:00.000 --> 00:02:03.000 +[action] Beneath, a man bangs on ceiling with a broom. + +00:02:03.000 --> 00:02:08.000 + +Oh shut up! [action] Bang bang. Shut up! [action] They stop talking upstairs. + +00:02:08.000 --> 00:02:12.000 + +Oh, that's better. [action] Looks at camera. And now for something completely different… a man with three buttocks… + +00:02:12.000 --> 00:02:14.000 + +We've done that! + +00:02:14.000 --> 00:02:16.000 +[action] Man looks up, disconcerted. + +00:02:16.000 --> 00:02:18.000 + +Oh all right. All right! A man with nine legs. + +00:02:18.000 --> 00:02:19.000 + +He ran away. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_02__Sex_and_violence/9_A_Scotsman_on_a_horse.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_02__Sex_and_violence/9_A_Scotsman_on_a_horse.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..5c1473c7 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_02__Sex_and_violence/9_A_Scotsman_on_a_horse.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,33 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit begins at anchor #9. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:03.000 + +Oh… Bloody Hell! Er … a Scotsman on a horse! + +00:00:03.000 --> 00:00:08.000 +[action] Film: Scotsman (John) rides up on a horse; looks around, puzzled. + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:12.000 +[action] Cut: Women's Institute audience applauding. + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:16.000 +[action] Man with two noses (Graham) blows from elbow. + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:19.000 +[action] Audience applauds. + +00:00:19.000 --> 00:00:22.000 +[action] Cartoon of a flying sheep. + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:26.000 + +Harold! Come back, Harold! Harold! Come back, Harold! Oh, blast! + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:30.000 +[action] Sheep shot down by a cannon. + +00:00:30.000 --> 00:00:34.000 +[action] Film: audience of Indian ladies not applauding. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_03__How_to_recognise_different_types_of_trees_from_quite_a_long_way_away/0_head_tail.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_03__How_to_recognise_different_types_of_trees_from_quite_a_long_way_away/0_head_tail.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..54b15377 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_03__How_to_recognise_different_types_of_trees_from_quite_a_long_way_away/0_head_tail.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,58 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Intro titles, recurring larch stings, closing credits + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:03.000 +[action] Man runs through a forest toward camera with tattered clothes. + +00:00:03.000 --> 00:00:04.500 + +It's… + +00:00:04.500 --> 00:00:07.500 + +Monty Python's Flying Circus. + +00:00:07.500 --> 00:00:12.000 +[action] Animated titles with pretty flowers and a magic lantern slide. + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:17.000 +[caption] 'EPISODE 12B' / 'HOW TO RECOGNISE DIFFERENT TREES FROM QUITE A LONG WAY AWAY' / 'NO. 1' / 'THE LARCH' + +00:00:17.000 --> 00:00:19.500 +[action] Photo of a larch tree. + +00:00:19.500 --> 00:00:22.500 + +The larch. The larch. + +00:14:30.000 --> 00:14:33.000 +[caption] 'AND NOW' / 'NO. 1' / 'THE LARCH' + +00:14:33.000 --> 00:14:35.000 +[action] Picture of a larch tree. + +00:14:35.000 --> 00:14:37.000 + +The larch. + +00:14:37.000 --> 00:14:41.000 +[caption] 'AND NOW' / 'NO. 3' / 'THE LARCH' / 'AND NOW…' + +00:14:41.000 --> 00:14:44.000 +[action] Picture of a horse chestnut tree. + +00:14:44.000 --> 00:14:46.000 + +The horse chestnut. + +00:28:20.000 --> 00:28:25.000 +[action] Closing film: referee whistles; 'It's' man runs away from camera. + +00:28:25.000 --> 00:28:31.000 +[caption] '"HOW TO RECOGNIZE DIFFERENT TYPES OF TREES FROM QUITE A LONG WAY AWAY" WAS CONCEIVED, WRITTEN AND PERFORMED BY… (CREDITS ROLL)' + +00:28:31.000 --> 00:28:33.000 + +The Larch. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_03__How_to_recognise_different_types_of_trees_from_quite_a_long_way_away/1_Court_scene_(witness_in_coffin_Cardinal_Richelieu).vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_03__How_to_recognise_different_types_of_trees_from_quite_a_long_way_away/1_Court_scene_(witness_in_coffin_Cardinal_Richelieu).vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..e3a38ba8 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_03__How_to_recognise_different_types_of_trees_from_quite_a_long_way_away/1_Court_scene_(witness_in_coffin_Cardinal_Richelieu).vtt @@ -0,0 +1,297 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Courtroom sketch with Mr Larch, counsel, coffin witness, and Cardinal Richelieu; includes song interlude. + +00:00:22.500 --> 00:00:26.500 +[action] Courtroom: judge presides; prisoner in the dock. + +00:00:26.500 --> 00:00:32.000 + +Mr Larch, you heard the case for the prosecution. Is there anything you wish to say before I pass sentence? + +00:00:32.000 --> 00:00:58.000 + +Well… I'd just like to say, m'lud, I've got a family… a wife and six kids… and I hope very much you don't have to take away my freedom… because… well, because m'lud freedom is a state much prized within the realm of civilized society. [action] Slips into Olivier impression. It is a bond wherewith the savage man may charm the outward hatchments of his soul… Freedom! Freedom! Freedom! + +00:00:58.000 --> 00:01:01.000 + +It's only a bloody parking offence. + +00:01:01.000 --> 00:01:04.500 +[action] Counsel strides into court. + +00:01:04.500 --> 00:01:12.000 + +I'm sorry I'm late m'lud I couldn't find a kosher car park. Er… don't bother to recap m'lud, I'll pick it up as we go along. Call Mrs Fiona Lewis. + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:15.000 +[action] Pepperpot walks into the court and steps into the witness box. + +00:01:15.000 --> 00:01:17.500 + +Call Mrs Fiona Lewis. + +00:01:17.500 --> 00:02:05.000 + +[action] Takes bible. I swear to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth, so anyway, I said to her, I said, they can't afford that on what he earns… [action] Rambling monologue continues, counsel tries to interject; she is eventually pushed out still talking. + +00:02:05.000 --> 00:02:08.000 + +Mr Bartlett, I fail to see the relevance of your last witness. + +00:02:08.000 --> 00:02:12.000 + +My next witness will explain that if m'ludship will allow. I call the late Arthur Aldridge. + +00:02:12.000 --> 00:02:14.500 + +The late Arthur Aidridge. + +00:02:14.500 --> 00:02:16.500 + +The late Arthur Aldridge? + +00:02:16.500 --> 00:02:18.500 + +Yes m'lud. + +00:02:18.500 --> 00:02:22.500 +[action] A coffin is brought in and laid across the witness box. + +00:02:22.500 --> 00:02:26.500 + +Mr Bartlett, do you think there is any relevance in questioning the deceased? + +00:02:26.500 --> 00:02:28.500 + +I beg your pardon m'lud. + +00:02:28.500 --> 00:02:31.500 + +Well, I mean, your witness is dead. + +00:02:31.500 --> 00:02:35.000 + +Yes, m'lud. Er, well, er, virtually, m'lud. + +00:02:35.000 --> 00:02:37.500 + +He's not completely dead? + +00:02:37.500 --> 00:02:41.000 + +No he's not completely dead m'lud. No. But he's not at all well. + +00:02:41.000 --> 00:02:44.000 + +But if he's not dead, what's he doing in a coffin? + +00:02:44.000 --> 00:02:53.000 + +Oh, it's purely a precaution m'lud—if I may continue? Mr Aldridge, you were a… you are a stockbroker of 10 Savundra Close, Wimbledon. [action] Bang from inside coffin. Mr Aldridge… + +00:02:53.000 --> 00:02:55.000 + +What was that knock? + +00:02:55.000 --> 00:03:05.000 + +It means 'yes' m'lud. One knock for 'yes', and two knocks for 'no'. If I may continue? Mr Aldridge, would it be fair to say that you are not at all well? [action] Bang from coffin. In fact… would you be prepared to say you are 'dead'? [action] Silence. Mr Aldridge I put it to you that you are dead. [action] Silence. Ah ha! + +00:03:05.000 --> 00:03:07.500 + +Where is all this leading us? + +00:03:07.500 --> 00:03:16.000 + +That will become apparent in one moment m'lud. [action] Walks to coffin. Mr Aldridge are you considering the question or are you just dead? [action] Silence. I'd better take a look m'lud. [action] Opens, peers in, then closes coffin. No further questions m'lud. + +00:03:16.000 --> 00:03:21.000 + +What do you mean, no further questions? You can't just dump a dead body in my court and say 'no further questions'. I demand an explanation. + +00:03:21.000 --> 00:03:23.500 + +There are no easy answers in this case m'lud. + +00:03:23.500 --> 00:03:27.000 + +I think you haven't got the slightest idea what this case is about. + +00:03:27.000 --> 00:03:33.000 + +M'lud the strange, damnable, almost diabolic threads of this extraordinary tangled web of intrigue will shortly m'lud reveal a plot so fiendish, so infernal, so heinous … + +00:03:33.000 --> 00:03:36.000 + +Mr Bartlett, your client has already pleaded guilty to the parking offence. + +00:03:36.000 --> 00:03:41.000 + +Parking offence, schmarking offence, m'lud. We must leave no stone unturned. Call Cardinal Richelieu. + +00:03:41.000 --> 00:03:44.000 + +Oh, you're just trying to string this case out. Cardinal Richelieu? + +00:03:44.000 --> 00:03:46.000 + +A character witness m'lud. + +00:03:46.000 --> 00:03:49.000 +[action] Fanfare of trumpets. Cardinal Richelieu enters in beautiful robes. + +00:03:49.000 --> 00:03:54.000 + +'Allo everyone, it's wonderful to be 'ere y'know, I just love your country. London is so beautiful at this time of year. + +00:03:54.000 --> 00:03:58.000 + +Er, you are Cardinal Armand du Plessis de Richelieu, First Minister of Louis XIII? + +00:03:58.000 --> 00:04:00.000 + +Oui. + +00:04:00.000 --> 00:04:06.000 + +Would it be fair to say you built up the centralized monarchy in France and perpetuated the religious schism in Europe? + +00:04:06.000 --> 00:04:08.000 + +That's what they say. + +00:04:08.000 --> 00:04:10.000 + +Did you persecute the Huguenots? + +00:04:10.000 --> 00:04:11.500 + +Oui. + +00:04:11.500 --> 00:04:16.000 + +And did you take sterner measures against Catholic nobles who made common cause with foreign foes? + +00:04:16.000 --> 00:04:18.000 + +I sure did that thing. + +00:04:18.000 --> 00:04:21.000 + +Are you acquainted with the defendant, Harold Larch? + +00:04:21.000 --> 00:04:23.000 + +Since I was so high. [action] Indicates height. + +00:04:23.000 --> 00:04:29.000 + +Speaking as Cardinal, First Minister, and architect of the modern world—would you say Harold Larch is of good character? + +00:04:29.000 --> 00:04:31.500 + +Listen. Harry is a very wonderful human being. + +00:04:31.500 --> 00:04:35.000 + +M'lud. In view of the impeccable nature of this character witness may I plead for clemency. + +00:04:35.000 --> 00:04:37.000 + +Oh but it's only thirty shillings. + +00:04:37.000 --> 00:04:40.000 +[action] Inspector Dim enters. + +00:04:40.000 --> 00:04:41.500 + +Not so fast! + +00:04:41.500 --> 00:04:43.000 + +Why not? + +00:04:43.000 --> 00:04:47.000 + +[aside] Momentarily thrown. None of your smart answers … you think you're so clever. Well, I'm Dim. + +00:04:47.000 --> 00:04:49.000 +[caption] 'DIM OF THE YARD' + +00:04:49.000 --> 00:04:51.000 + +[chorus] Dim! Consternation! Uproar! + +00:04:51.000 --> 00:04:54.000 + +Yes, and I've a few questions I'd like to ask Cardinal so-called Richelieu. + +00:04:54.000 --> 00:04:55.500 + +Bonjour Monsieur Dim. + +00:04:55.500 --> 00:04:59.000 + +So-called Cardinal, I put it to you that you died in December 1642. + +00:04:59.000 --> 00:05:00.500 + +That is correct. + +00:05:00.500 --> 00:05:03.000 + +Ah ha! He fell for my little trap. + +00:05:03.000 --> 00:05:05.000 +[action] Court applauds; Cardinal dismayed. + +00:05:05.000 --> 00:05:08.000 + +Curse you Inspector Dim. You are too clever for us naughty people. + +00:05:08.000 --> 00:05:12.000 + +And furthermore I suggest that you are none other than Ron Higgins, professional Cardinal Richelieu impersonator. + +00:05:12.000 --> 00:05:13.500 + +It's a fair cop. + +00:05:13.500 --> 00:05:16.000 + +My you're clever Dim. He'd certainly taken me in. + +00:05:16.000 --> 00:05:18.000 + +It's all in a day's work. + +00:05:18.000 --> 00:05:22.000 + +With a brilliant mind like yours, Dim, you could be something other than a policeman. + +00:05:22.000 --> 00:05:23.000 + +Yes. + +00:05:23.000 --> 00:05:24.000 + +What? + +00:05:24.000 --> 00:05:26.000 +[action] Piano starts playing introduction. + +00:05:26.000 --> 00:05:40.000 + +[singing] If I were not in the CID / Something else I'd like to be / If I were not in the CID / A window cleaner, me! / With a rub-a-dub-dub and a scrub-a-dub-dub… + +00:05:40.000 --> 00:05:44.000 +[action] Court mimes and sings chorus with him. + +00:05:44.000 --> 00:05:54.000 + +[singing] If I were not before the bar / Something else I'd like to be / If I were not a barr-is-ter / An engine driver me! / With a chuffchuffchuff etc. + +00:05:54.000 --> 00:05:59.000 +[action] Counsel mimes engine; others stare in amazement; he subsides. Knight in armour enters and hits him with a raw chicken. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_03__How_to_recognise_different_types_of_trees_from_quite_a_long_way_away/2_The_larch_(sting_#1).vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_03__How_to_recognise_different_types_of_trees_from_quite_a_long_way_away/2_The_larch_(sting_#1).vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..02baa5e0 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_03__How_to_recognise_different_types_of_trees_from_quite_a_long_way_away/2_The_larch_(sting_#1).vtt @@ -0,0 +1,17 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Recurring larch identification sting. + +00:05:59.000 --> 00:06:03.000 +[caption] 'NO. 1' / 'THE LARCH' + +00:06:03.000 --> 00:06:05.000 +[action] Photo of larch tree. + +00:06:05.000 --> 00:06:08.000 + +The larch. The larch. + +00:06:08.000 --> 00:06:11.000 +[caption] 'AND NOW…NO. 1…THE LARCH…AND NOW…' + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_03__How_to_recognise_different_types_of_trees_from_quite_a_long_way_away/3_Bicycle_repair_man.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_03__How_to_recognise_different_types_of_trees_from_quite_a_long_way_away/3_Bicycle_repair_man.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..cefb544f --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_03__How_to_recognise_different_types_of_trees_from_quite_a_long_way_away/3_Bicycle_repair_man.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,121 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE In a world of Supermen, F. G. Superman becomes Bicycle Repair Man. + +00:06:11.000 --> 00:06:15.000 +[action] Superman striding against the sky; reveal a modern street full of Supermen. + +00:06:15.000 --> 00:06:20.000 + +[American accent] This man is no ordinary man. This is Mr. F. G. Superman. To all appearances, he looks like any other law-abiding citizen. + +00:06:20.000 --> 00:06:28.000 +[action] Bus full of Supermen; camera tracks in on F. G. Superman. + +00:06:28.000 --> 00:06:33.000 + +But Mr F. G. Superman has a secret identity… when trouble strikes… he is ready to become… Bicycle Repair Man! + +00:06:33.000 --> 00:06:40.000 +[action] Country lane: Superman on a bicycle crashes into a ditch. Laundrette full of Supermen; Superboy bursts in. + +00:06:40.000 --> 00:06:43.000 + +[dramatically] Hey, there's a bicycle broken. Up the road. + +00:06:43.000 --> 00:06:45.500 +[action] General consternation. + +00:06:45.500 --> 00:06:51.000 + +[voice over] Hmmmmm. Thinks—this sounds like a job for… Bicycle Repair Man… but how to change without revealing my secret identity? + +00:06:51.000 --> 00:06:54.000 +[action] Close-up F. G. Superman; he narrows his eyes. + +00:06:54.000 --> 00:06:56.500 + +If only Bicycle Repair Man were here! + +00:06:56.500 --> 00:06:59.500 + +Yes. Wait! I think I know where I can find him—look over there! + +00:06:59.500 --> 00:07:05.000 +[action] They look out; he dons overalls at 'FLASH!'; emerges as Bicycle Repair Man with specs and tools. + +00:07:05.000 --> 00:07:07.500 + +Bicycle Repair Man! But… how?! + +00:07:07.500 --> 00:07:09.000 + +Oh look—is it a Stockbroker? + +00:07:09.000 --> 00:07:10.500 + +Is it a Quantity Surveyor? + +00:07:10.500 --> 00:07:12.000 + +Is it a Church Warden? + +00:07:12.000 --> 00:07:14.000 + +No! It's BICYCLE REPAIR MAN! + +00:07:14.000 --> 00:07:18.000 +[action] Country road: Superman gestures at mangled bicycle. + +00:07:18.000 --> 00:07:22.000 + +My! BICYCLE REPAIR MAN! Thank goodness you've come! Look! + +00:07:22.000 --> 00:07:28.000 +[action] Speeded-up repair montage. [caption] CLINK! SCREW! BEND! INFLATE! ALTER SADDLE! + +00:07:28.000 --> 00:07:30.500 + +Why! He's mending it with his own hands! + +00:07:30.500 --> 00:07:33.000 + +See! How he uses a spanner to tighten that nut! + +00:07:33.000 --> 00:07:36.000 +[action] Presents gleaming bicycle. + +00:07:36.000 --> 00:07:39.000 + +Oh…Oh! Bicycle Repair Man! How can I ever repay you? + +00:07:39.000 --> 00:07:44.000 + +Oh, you don't need to guv, it's all right, it's all in a day's work for… Bicycle Repair Man! + +00:07:44.000 --> 00:07:46.000 + +Our Hero! + +00:07:46.000 --> 00:07:49.000 +[action] Bicycle Repair Man shuffles into sunset (speeded up). + +00:07:49.000 --> 00:07:54.000 + +Yes! Whenever bicycles are broken, or menaced by International Communism, Bicycle Repair Man is ready! + +00:07:54.000 --> 00:08:05.000 + +[action] Commentator in garden at mic. He grows hysterical: Ready to smash the communists… Kill! Kill! Kill! … I hate 'em! Aaargh! + +00:08:05.000 --> 00:08:07.000 + +Norman! Tea's ready. + +00:08:07.000 --> 00:08:09.000 + +[calmly] Coming dear! + +00:08:09.000 --> 00:08:12.000 +[action] He tidies and exits; knight in armour crosses frame after him. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_03__How_to_recognise_different_types_of_trees_from_quite_a_long_way_away/4_Children's_stories.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_03__How_to_recognise_different_types_of_trees_from_quite_a_long_way_away/4_Children's_stories.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..8188248e --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_03__How_to_recognise_different_types_of_trees_from_quite_a_long_way_away/4_Children's_stories.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,22 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Storyteller reads increasingly inappropriate children's tales; cutaways to Gilliam animation. + +00:08:12.000 --> 00:08:16.000 +[action] Gentle children's music; bunnies jump in animation. + +00:08:16.000 --> 00:08:35.000 + +[sits with large children's book] Hello, Children, hello. Here is this morning's story. Are you ready? Then we'll begin. 'One day Ricky the magic Pixie went to visit Daisy Bumble in her tumbledown cottage. He found her in the bedroom. Roughly he grabbed her heavy shoulders pulling her down on to the bed and ripping off her—' [action] Reads silently, turns page quickly, smiles. + +00:08:35.000 --> 00:08:52.000 + +'Old Nick the Sea Captain was a rough tough jolly sort of fellow. He loved the life of the sea and he loved to hang out down by the pier where the men dressed as ladies…' [action] Reads on silently; a stick pokes him; he starts and turns page. + +00:08:52.000 --> 00:09:12.000 + +'Rumpletweezer ran the Dinky Tinky shop in the foot of the magic oak tree… Here he sold contraceptives and … discipline?… naked? … With a melon!?' + +00:09:12.000 --> 00:09:18.000 +[action] Animation: a hippo squashes the bunnies; other chaotic visuals. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_03__How_to_recognise_different_types_of_trees_from_quite_a_long_way_away/5_Restaurant_sketch.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_03__How_to_recognise_different_types_of_trees_from_quite_a_long_way_away/5_Restaurant_sketch.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..4a99eb1b --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_03__How_to_recognise_different_types_of_trees_from_quite_a_long_way_away/5_Restaurant_sketch.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,203 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Escalating overreaction to a dirty fork in a posh restaurant. + +00:09:18.000 --> 00:09:25.000 + +Hello again, now here's a little sketch by two boys from London town… it's called - Restaurant sketch. + +00:09:25.000 --> 00:09:28.000 +[action] Film clip: Women's Institute applauding. Couple seated at a restaurant table. + +00:09:28.000 --> 00:09:31.000 + +It's nice here, isn't it? + +00:09:31.000 --> 00:09:34.000 + +Oh, very good restaurant, three stars you know. + +00:09:34.000 --> 00:09:35.500 + +Really? + +00:09:35.500 --> 00:09:37.000 + +Mmm… + +00:09:37.000 --> 00:09:41.000 + +Good evening, sir! Good evening, madam! And may I say what a pleasure it is to see you here again, sir! + +00:09:41.000 --> 00:09:47.000 + +Well there you are dear. Have a look there, anything you like. The boeuf en croute is fantastic. + +00:09:47.000 --> 00:09:52.000 + +If I may suggest, sir … the pheasant à la reine; the sauce is one of the chef's most famous creations. + +00:09:52.000 --> 00:09:58.000 + +Em… that sounds good. Anyway just have a look… take your time. Oh, er by the way—got a bit of a dirty fork, could you… get me another one? + +00:09:58.000 --> 00:10:00.000 + +I beg your pardon. + +00:10:00.000 --> 00:10:04.000 + +Oh it's nothing… I've got a fork a little bit dirty. Could you get me another one? Thank you. + +00:10:04.000 --> 00:10:06.000 + +Oh … sir, I do apologize. + +00:10:06.000 --> 00:10:08.000 + +Oh, no need to apologize, it doesn't worry me. + +00:10:08.000 --> 00:10:12.000 + +Oh no, no, no, I do apologize. I will fetch the head waiter immediatement. + +00:10:12.000 --> 00:10:14.000 + +Oh, there's no need to do that! + +00:10:14.000 --> 00:10:18.000 + +No, no… I'm sure the head waiter will want to apologize to you himself. I will fetch him at once. + +00:10:18.000 --> 00:10:21.000 + +Well, you certainly get good service here. + +00:10:21.000 --> 00:10:23.000 + +They really look after you… yes. + +00:10:23.000 --> 00:10:28.000 + +Excuse me monsieur and madame. [action] Examines the fork. It's filthy, Gaston… find out who washed this up, and give them their cards immediately. + +00:10:28.000 --> 00:10:30.000 + +Oh, no, no. + +00:10:30.000 --> 00:10:34.000 + +Better still, we can't afford to take any chances, sack the entire washing-up staff. + +00:10:34.000 --> 00:10:37.000 + +No, look I don't want to make any trouble. + +00:10:37.000 --> 00:10:42.000 + +Please, it's no fuss. I quite simply wish to ensure that nothing interferes with your complete enjoyment of the meal. + +00:10:42.000 --> 00:10:45.000 + +Oh I'm sure it won't, it was only a dirty fork. + +00:10:45.000 --> 00:10:53.000 + +I know. And I'm sorry, bitterly sorry, but I know that… no apologies I can make can alter the fact that in our restaurant you have been given a dirty, filthy, smelly piece of cutlery… + +00:10:53.000 --> 00:10:54.500 + +It wasn't smelly. + +00:10:54.500 --> 00:11:02.000 + +It was smelly, and obscene and disgusting and I hate it… nasty, grubby, dirty, mingy, scrubby little fork. Oh… oh… oh… + +00:11:02.000 --> 00:11:05.000 +[action] Head waiter runs off in a passion as the manager arrives. + +00:11:05.000 --> 00:11:09.000 + +Good evening, sir, good evening, madam. I am the manager. I've only just heard… may I sit down? + +00:11:09.000 --> 00:11:10.500 + +Yes, of course. + +00:11:10.500 --> 00:11:13.000 + +I want to apologize, humbly, deeply, and sincerely about the fork. + +00:11:13.000 --> 00:11:16.000 + +Oh please, it's only a tiny bit… I couldn't see it. + +00:11:16.000 --> 00:11:19.000 + +Ah you're good kind fine people, for saying that, but I can see it… to me it's like a mountain, a vast bowl of pus. + +00:11:19.000 --> 00:11:21.000 + +It's not as bad as that. + +00:11:21.000 --> 00:11:35.000 + +It gets me here. I can't give you any excuses—there are no excuses. I've been meaning to spend more time in the restaurant, but I haven't been too well… things aren't going well back there… but together we were beginning to get over this dark patch… now this… now this… + +00:11:35.000 --> 00:11:37.000 + +Can I get you some water? + +00:11:37.000 --> 00:11:39.000 + +[in tears] It's the end of the road!! + +00:11:39.000 --> 00:11:42.000 +[action] The cook (very big) enters with a meat cleaver. + +00:11:42.000 --> 00:11:52.000 + +[shouting] You bastards! You vicious, heartless bastards! Look what you've done to him! … Oh… it makes me mad… mad! [action] Slams cleaver into the table. + +00:11:52.000 --> 00:11:56.000 +[action] Head waiter tries to restrain him. + +00:11:56.000 --> 00:12:00.000 + +Easy, Mungo, easy… Mungo… [action] Clutches head. The war wound!… the wound… the wound… + +00:12:00.000 --> 00:12:03.000 + +This is the end! The end! Aaargh!! + +00:12:03.000 --> 00:12:05.000 +[action] Manager stabs himself with the fork. + +00:12:05.000 --> 00:12:08.000 + +They've destroyed him! He's dead!! They killed him!!! + +00:12:08.000 --> 00:12:12.000 + +[trying to restrain] No Mungo… never kill a customer. [in pain] Oh… the wound! The wound! + +00:12:12.000 --> 00:12:15.000 +[action] Head waiter and cook fight and fall over the table. + +00:12:15.000 --> 00:12:17.000 +[caption] AND NOW THE PUNCH-LINE + +00:12:17.000 --> 00:12:20.000 + +Lucky we didn't say anything about the dirty knife. + +00:12:20.000 --> 00:12:24.000 +[action] Boos of disgust from off-screen. Cut back to seaside compère. + +00:12:24.000 --> 00:12:31.000 + +Well, there we are then, that was the restaurant sketch, a nice little number… a bit vicious in parts, but a lot of fun… but how about that punch line, eh?… Oh, you know what I mean—oh… oh… really. + +00:12:31.000 --> 00:12:34.000 +[action] Man from the sketch borrows the knight's chicken and hits the compère with it. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_03__How_to_recognise_different_types_of_trees_from_quite_a_long_way_away/6_Seduced_milkmen.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_03__How_to_recognise_different_types_of_trees_from_quite_a_long_way_away/6_Seduced_milkmen.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..3f3ea01f --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_03__How_to_recognise_different_types_of_trees_from_quite_a_long_way_away/6_Seduced_milkmen.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,13 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE A milkman is lured into a house and trapped with many others. + +00:12:34.000 --> 00:12:40.000 +[caption] Cartoon advert: 'Interesting Lives' leads to film. + +00:12:40.000 --> 00:12:49.000 +[action] Milkman delivers to a suburban house. A seductively dressed young lady beckons him inside and upstairs. + +00:12:49.000 --> 00:12:56.000 +[action] In the bedroom: several elderly milkmen are already there; the door closes behind him. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_03__How_to_recognise_different_types_of_trees_from_quite_a_long_way_away/7_Stolen_newsreader.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_03__How_to_recognise_different_types_of_trees_from_quite_a_long_way_away/7_Stolen_newsreader.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..84d4aaf3 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_03__How_to_recognise_different_types_of_trees_from_quite_a_long_way_away/7_Stolen_newsreader.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,32 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Armed gang abducts the newsreader as he calmly continues the bulletin. + +00:12:56.000 --> 00:12:59.000 +[action] BBC News studio: Newsreader sets down phone; classic BBC mic on desk. + +00:12:59.000 --> 00:13:10.000 + +Good evening, here is the 6 o'clock News read by Michael Queen. It's been a quiet day… The only high spot was the meeting between officials of the NEDC and the ODCN in Bradford today. + +00:13:10.000 --> 00:13:16.000 +[action] Axes split open the studio door; masked men burst in firing. He continues, unperturbed. + +00:13:16.000 --> 00:13:46.000 + +[continues] In Geneva, officials of the Central Clearing Banks met with Herr Voleschtadt of Poland… new zinc-treating works… Board of Trade ratified a Trade Agreement… substantial drop in Gold Reserves… [action] He is wheeled through BBC corridors, onto a lorry, through London and the countryside, still reading. + +00:13:46.000 --> 00:13:58.000 + +Still no news of the National Savings book lost by Mr Charles Griffiths of Porthcawl… In Cornwall the death has been announced today of General Sir Hugh Marksby-Smith… + +00:13:58.000 --> 00:14:10.000 + +In the match between Glamorgan and Yorkshire… Weather for tomorrow will be cloudy with occasional outbreaks of rain. And that is the end of the news. + +00:14:10.000 --> 00:14:12.000 +[action] Gang pushes desk off a jetty into the sea. + +00:14:12.000 --> 00:14:14.000 +[caption/sfx] FX splash. Gurgle gurgle. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_03__How_to_recognise_different_types_of_trees_from_quite_a_long_way_away/8_Children's_interview.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_03__How_to_recognise_different_types_of_trees_from_quite_a_long_way_away/8_Children's_interview.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..d0e6624e --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_03__How_to_recognise_different_types_of_trees_from_quite_a_long_way_away/8_Children's_interview.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,83 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Interviewer quizzes children about larch trees; they demand Eric's sketch. + +00:14:14.000 --> 00:14:17.000 +[action] Film clip of cheering crowd; cut to playground interview. + +00:14:17.000 --> 00:14:20.000 + +Eric … do you think you could recognize a larch tree? + +00:14:20.000 --> 00:14:22.000 + +[after much deliberation] Don't know. + +00:14:22.000 --> 00:14:24.000 +[caption] Roars of delighted pre-recorded laughter. + +00:14:24.000 --> 00:14:26.000 + +What's your name? + +00:14:26.000 --> 00:14:27.500 + +Michael. + +00:14:27.500 --> 00:14:29.000 +[caption] Laughter. + +00:14:29.000 --> 00:14:32.000 + +Michael, do you think you know what a larch tree looks like? + +00:14:32.000 --> 00:14:34.000 + +[bursting into tears] I want to go home. + +00:14:34.000 --> 00:14:36.000 +[caption] Shrieks from unseen audience. + +00:14:36.000 --> 00:14:37.500 + +Bottom! + +00:14:37.500 --> 00:14:39.000 +[caption] More shrieks. + +00:14:39.000 --> 00:14:44.000 + +Are there any other trees that any of you think you could recognize from quite a long way away? + +00:14:44.000 --> 00:14:47.000 + +I … want… to see a sketch of Eric's please… + +00:14:47.000 --> 00:14:48.500 + +What? + +00:14:48.500 --> 00:14:51.000 + +I want to see a sketch of Eric's. Nudge Nudge. + +00:14:51.000 --> 00:14:52.500 + +A sketch? + +00:14:52.500 --> 00:14:54.000 + +Eric's written… + +00:14:54.000 --> 00:14:55.500 + +I written a sketch. + +00:14:55.500 --> 00:14:57.000 + +Nudge nudge, Eric's written … + +00:14:57.000 --> 00:14:59.000 + +Nudge nudge… nudge… nudge. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_03__How_to_recognise_different_types_of_trees_from_quite_a_long_way_away/9_Nudge_nudge.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_03__How_to_recognise_different_types_of_trees_from_quite_a_long_way_away/9_Nudge_nudge.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..a429f202 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_03__How_to_recognise_different_types_of_trees_from_quite_a_long_way_away/9_Nudge_nudge.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,141 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Pub conversation: Norman pesters a man with innuendo about his wife. + +00:14:59.000 --> 00:15:02.000 +[action] Two men in a pub; Norman leans in. + +00:15:02.000 --> 00:15:08.000 + +Is your wife a… goer… eh? Know what I mean? Know what I mean? Nudge nudge. Nudge nudge. Know what I mean? Say no more… know what I mean? + +00:15:08.000 --> 00:15:10.000 + +I beg your pardon? + +00:15:10.000 --> 00:15:15.000 + +Your wife… does she, er, does she 'go'—eh? eh? eh? Know what I mean, know what I mean? Nudge nudge. Say no more. + +00:15:15.000 --> 00:15:17.000 + +Well, she sometimes goes, yes. + +00:15:17.000 --> 00:15:19.500 + +I bet she does. I bet she does. I bet she does. Know what I mean? Nudge nudge. + +00:15:19.500 --> 00:15:21.500 + +I'm sorry, I don't quite follow you. + +00:15:21.500 --> 00:15:26.000 + +Follow me. Follow me. I like that. That's good. A nod's as good as a wink to a blind bat, eh? [action] Elbow gesture; rubs it. + +00:15:26.000 --> 00:15:28.000 + +Are you trying to sell something? + +00:15:28.000 --> 00:15:33.000 + +Selling, selling. Very good. Very good. [action] Hand tilting quickly. Oh, wicked. Wicked. You're wicked. Eh? Know what I mean? Nudge nudge… Say… no… more. + +00:15:33.000 --> 00:15:34.500 + +But… + +00:15:34.500 --> 00:15:37.500 + +[action] Finger alongside nose. Your wife is she, eh… is she a sport. Eh? + +00:15:37.500 --> 00:15:39.000 + +She likes sport, yes! + +00:15:39.000 --> 00:15:40.500 + +I bet she does, I bet she does! + +00:15:40.500 --> 00:15:43.000 + +She is very fond of cricket, as a matter of fact. + +00:15:43.000 --> 00:15:48.000 + +[leans across, looking away] Who isn't, eh? Know what I mean. Likes games, likes games… She's been around, eh? Been around? + +00:15:48.000 --> 00:15:50.000 + +She's traveled. She's from Purley. + +00:15:50.000 --> 00:15:53.000 + +Oh… oh. Say no more, say no more. Say no more—Purley, say no more. Purley, eh? + +00:15:53.000 --> 00:15:56.000 +[action] He leers, grinning. + +00:15:56.000 --> 00:16:00.000 + +Your wife interested in er… [waggles head, leans across] photographs, eh? Know what I mean? 'he asked him knowingly'. + +00:16:00.000 --> 00:16:01.500 + +Photography? + +00:16:01.500 --> 00:16:04.000 + +Yes. Nudge nudge. Snap snap. Grin grin, wink wink, say no more? + +00:16:04.000 --> 00:16:05.500 + +Holiday snaps? + +00:16:05.500 --> 00:16:10.000 + +Could be, could be taken on holiday. Could be yes—swimming costumes. Know what I mean. Candid photography. Know what I mean, nudge nudge. + +00:16:10.000 --> 00:16:12.000 + +No, no we don't have a camera. + +00:16:12.000 --> 00:16:14.000 + +Oh. Still—Woah! Eh? Wo-oah! Eh? + +00:16:14.000 --> 00:16:16.000 + +Look, are you insinuating something? + +00:16:16.000 --> 00:16:17.500 + +Oh… no… no… Yes. + +00:16:17.500 --> 00:16:18.500 + +Well? + +00:16:18.500 --> 00:16:24.000 + +Well. I mean. Er, I mean. You're a man of the world, aren't you… you've… been there haven't you… you've been around… eh? + +00:16:24.000 --> 00:16:25.500 + +What do you mean? + +00:16:25.500 --> 00:16:30.000 + +Well I mean like you've… you've done it… you've… slept… with a lady. + +00:16:30.000 --> 00:16:31.500 + +Yes. + +00:16:31.500 --> 00:16:34.000 + +What's it like? + +00:16:34.000 --> 00:16:38.000 +[caption] Enormous artificial laugh on soundtrack. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_04__Owl-stretching_time/0_Episode4_head_tail.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_04__Owl-stretching_time/0_Episode4_head_tail.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..6bde1bf6 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_04__Owl-stretching_time/0_Episode4_head_tail.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,55 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Intro titles, bumpers, interstitials, and end credits + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 +[action] The 'It's' man is hurled over a cliff and crawls on a shale beach toward camera. + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:06.500 + +It's… + +00:00:06.500 --> 00:00:10.000 +[caption] 'MONTY PYTHON'S FLYING CIRCUS' + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:13.000 +[caption] 'EPISODE ARTHUR' • 'PART 7' • 'TEETH' + +00:07:30.000 --> 00:07:33.500 +[caption] 'LIVE FROM THE CARDIFF ROOMS, LIBYA' + +00:20:40.000 --> 00:20:44.000 +[caption] 'IT'S A MAN'S LIFE TAKING YOUR CLOTHES OFF IN PUBLIC' + +00:26:30.000 --> 00:26:34.000 +[action] Animation ends linking to a sedan chair at a deserted beach; changing into lace-trimmed bathing costume; trotting out to sea. + +00:28:50.000 --> 00:28:55.000 +[action] Film montage of sporting activities, wild west stagecoach, etc. + +00:28:55.000 --> 00:29:03.000 + +Excitement, drama, action, violence, fresh fruit. Passion. Thrills. Spills. Romance. Adventure, all the things you can read about in a book. + +00:44:30.000 --> 00:44:34.000 +[caption] 'LEMMING OF THE BDA' + +00:44:34.000 --> 00:44:40.000 +[caption] 'IT'S A MAN'S LIFE IN THE BRITISH DENTAL ASSOCIATION' + +00:44:40.000 --> 00:44:45.000 +[action] Referee blows whistle; the 'It's' man is poked with a stick, rises, and limps away. + +00:44:45.000 --> 00:44:52.000 +[caption] '"OWL-STRETCHING TIME" WAS CONCEIVED, WRITTEN AND PERFORMED BY… (CREDITS)' + +00:44:52.000 --> 00:45:05.000 +[action] End titles finish as the 'It's' man reaches the top of the cliff and disappears. + +00:45:05.000 --> 00:45:09.000 + +Ah! Got you my lad. Still acting eh? Over you go! + +00:45:09.000 --> 00:45:13.000 +[action] The 'It's' man is hurled back over the cliff. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_04__Owl-stretching_time/1_Song_('And_did_those_feet').vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_04__Owl-stretching_time/1_Song_('And_did_those_feet').vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..107ac515 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_04__Owl-stretching_time/1_Song_('And_did_those_feet').vtt @@ -0,0 +1,25 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit begins at anchor #1: Singer at high stool with guitar; Jerusalem pastiche + +00:00:13.000 --> 00:00:17.000 +[action] Singer in a sparkly jacket sits on a high stool with a guitar. + +00:00:17.000 --> 00:00:22.000 +[caption] LIVE FROM THE CARDIFF ROOMS, LIBYA + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:28.000 + +[singing] And did those teeth in ancient time… + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:52.000 + +… walk upon England's mountains green. [action] He stops playing. Good evening and welcome ladies and gentlemen. At this time we'd like to up the tempo a little, change the mood. We've got a number requested by Pip, Pauline, Nigel, Tarquin, and old Spotty—Tarquin's mother—a little number specially written for the pubescence of ex-King Zog of Albania, and it's entitled 'Art Gallery'. Hope you like it. + +00:27:05.000 --> 00:27:18.000 +[action] Later reprise in bed with a woman; singer reclining with guitar. + +00:27:18.000 --> 00:27:40.000 + +And did those feet in ancient times, walk upon England's mountains green… we'd like to alter the mood a little, we'd like to bring you something for mum and dad, Annie, and Roger, Mazarin and Louis and all at Versailles, it's a little number called 'England's Mountains Green'. Hope you like it. And did those feet in ancient time… + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_04__Owl-stretching_time/2_Art_gallery.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_04__Owl-stretching_time/2_Art_gallery.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..8da25f92 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_04__Owl-stretching_time/2_Art_gallery.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,78 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit begins at anchor #2: Two working mothers with unseen infants in a gallery + +00:00:52.000 --> 00:00:58.000 +[action] Interior: art gallery. Two middle-aged working mothers enter, each holding the hand of an unseen infant below frame. + +00:00:58.000 --> 00:01:00.500 + +'Allo, Marge! + +00:01:00.500 --> 00:01:04.000 + +Oh hello, Janet, how are you love? + +00:01:04.000 --> 00:01:07.000 + +Fancy seeing you! How's little Ralph? + +00:01:07.000 --> 00:01:15.000 + +Oh, don't ask me! He's been nothing but trouble all morning. Stop it Ralph! [action] She slaps at unseen infant. Stop it! + +00:01:15.000 --> 00:01:17.500 + +Same as my Kevin. + +00:01:17.500 --> 00:01:19.500 + +Really? + +00:01:19.500 --> 00:01:33.000 + +Nothing but trouble … leave it alone! He's just been in the Florentine Room and smeared tomato ketchup all over Raphael's Baby Jesus. [shouting] Put that Baroque masterpiece down! + +00:01:33.000 --> 00:01:42.000 + +Well, we've just come from the Courtauld and Ralph smashed every exhibit but one in the Danish Contemporary Sculpture Exhibition. + +00:01:42.000 --> 00:01:57.000 + +Just like my Kevin. Show him an exhibition of early eighteenth-century Dresden Pottery and he goes berserk. No, I said no, and I meant no! [action] She smacks unseen infant again. This morning we were viewing the early Flemish Masters of the Renaissance and Mannerist Schools, when he gets out his black aerosol and squirts Vermeer's Lady At A Window! + +00:01:57.000 --> 00:02:01.000 + +Still it's not as bad as spitting is it? + +00:02:01.000 --> 00:02:10.000 + +[firmly] No, well Kevin knows [action] slaps the infant that if he spits at a painting I'll never take him to an exhibition again. + +00:02:10.000 --> 00:02:27.000 + +Ralph used to spit—he could hit a Van Gogh at thirty yards. But he knows now it's wrong—don't you Ralph? [action] She looks down. Ralph! Stop it! Stop it! Stop chewing that Turner! You are… [action] she disappears from shot … You are a naughty, naughty, vicious little boy. [action] Smack; she returns holding a tattered copy of Turner's 'The Fighting Temeraire' in a gilt frame. Oh, look at that! The Fighting Temeraire—ruined! What shall I do? + +00:02:27.000 --> 00:02:33.000 + +[taking control] Now don't do a thing with it love, just put it in the bin over there. + +00:02:33.000 --> 00:02:34.500 + +Really? + +00:02:34.500 --> 00:02:47.000 + +Yes take my word for it, Marge. Kevin's eaten most of the early nineteenth-century British landscape artists, and I've learned not to worry. As a matter of fact, I feel a bit peckish myself. [action] She breaks a bit off the Turner. Yes… + +00:02:47.000 --> 00:02:50.000 +[action] Marge also tastes a bit. + +00:02:50.000 --> 00:02:52.500 + +I never used to like Turner. + +00:02:52.500 --> 00:02:57.500 + +[swallowing] No … I don't know much about art, but I know what I like. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_04__Owl-stretching_time/3_Art_critic.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_04__Owl-stretching_time/3_Art_critic.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..08d6ea6f --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_04__Owl-stretching_time/3_Art_critic.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,37 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit begins at anchor #3: Art critic with a mouthful of Utrillo + +00:02:57.500 --> 00:03:04.000 +[action] Cut to a book-lined study. An art critic at a desk, mouth full of Utrillo. Caption: 'AN ART CRITIC'. + +00:03:04.000 --> 00:03:21.000 + +[munching] Mmmm… [munches] Well I think Utrillo's brushwork is fantastic… [stifles burp] But he doesn't always agree with me … [belches] Not after a Rubens, anyway … all those cherries … ooohh … [suddenly] Urgh! I've got Vermeer all down my shirt… + +00:03:21.000 --> 00:03:27.000 + +[action] Wife enters with water jug and glass on a tray, sets it on the desk. Watteau, dear? + +00:03:27.000 --> 00:03:29.000 + +What a terrible joke. + +00:03:29.000 --> 00:03:31.000 + +But it's my only line. + +00:03:31.000 --> 00:03:37.000 + +[rising vehemently] All right! All right! But you didn't have to say it! You could have kept quiet for a change! + +00:03:37.000 --> 00:03:41.000 +[action] Wife cries. + +00:03:41.000 --> 00:03:45.000 + +Oh, that's typical. Talk talk talk. Natter natter natter! + +00:03:45.000 --> 00:03:51.000 +[action] Cut back to singer; he sings Jerusalem lines while a sexy girl fondles him. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_04__Owl-stretching_time/4_It's_a_man's_life_in_the_modern_army.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_04__Owl-stretching_time/4_It's_a_man's_life_in_the_modern_army.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..0ae82577 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_04__Owl-stretching_time/4_It's_a_man's_life_in_the_modern_army.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,18 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit begins at anchor #4: Colonel objects to slogan; control-room camera cuts + +00:03:51.000 --> 00:03:56.000 +[caption] IT'S A MAN'S LIFE IN THE CARDIFF ROOMS, LIBYA + +00:03:56.000 --> 00:04:32.000 + +Right, cut to me. As Officer Commanding the Regular Army's Advertising Division, I object, in the strongest possible terms to this obvious reference to our own slogan 'It's a dog's life… a man's life in the modern army' and I warn this programme that any recurrence of this sloppy long-haired civilian plagiarism will be dealt with most severely. Right, now on the command 'cut', the camera will cut to camera two, all right, director… Wait for it! Camera cut. + +00:04:32.000 --> 00:04:38.000 +[action] Cut to a man at a desk wearing a Viking helmet. + +00:04:38.000 --> 00:04:45.000 + +This is my only line. [catcalls] [defensively] Well, it's my only line. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_04__Owl-stretching_time/5_Undressing_in_public.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_04__Owl-stretching_time/5_Undressing_in_public.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..57e86d72 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_04__Owl-stretching_time/5_Undressing_in_public.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,14 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit begins at anchor #5: Gentleman tries to change trousers at the beach; repeated exposures + +00:04:45.000 --> 00:06:30.000 +[action] Gentleman in blazer and boater descends to beach with towel and trunks. As he changes, beachgoers stare blankly. He covers with a towel—girl snatches her own towel from him, exposing him. He retreats to a beach hut; mistakes a man shielding a cigarette for a peeper and kicks him; apologizes. A matronly woman throws him out of the hut. He tries behind an ice-cream van; a policeman moves the van on, revealing him trousers-down; he flees. At a hotel, he mimes needing to undress; the commissionaire misunderstands and begins to remove his own trousers. Back on the beach, deckchairs he hides behind are taken by a party; the hut he hides behind is dismantled. He dashes into an amusement arcade; a 'what the butler saw' machine reveals him changing; chased off. He stumbles onto a stage as curtains open to applause; he resigns himself and begins a striptease. + +00:06:30.000 --> 00:06:34.000 +[caption] IT'S A MAN'S LIFE TAKING YOUR CLOTHES OFF IN PUBLIC + +00:06:34.000 --> 00:06:48.000 + +Quiet. Quiet. Now wait a minute. I have already warned this programme about infringing the Army copyright of our slogan 'It's a pig's life… man's life in the modern army'. And I'm warning you if it happens again, I shall come down on this programme like a ton of bricks… right. Carry on sergeant major. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_04__Owl-stretching_time/6_Self-defence_(fresh_fruit).vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_04__Owl-stretching_time/6_Self-defence_(fresh_fruit).vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..06811b83 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_04__Owl-stretching_time/6_Self-defence_(fresh_fruit).vtt @@ -0,0 +1,162 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit begins at anchor #6: RSM teaches defense against fresh fruit + +00:06:48.000 --> 00:06:54.000 +[action] Gym. Four men assemble with an ex-RSM instructor. + +00:06:54.000 --> 00:06:56.500 + +Sir! Good evening, class. + +00:06:56.500 --> 00:07:10.000 + +[class murmurs greetings] Where's all the others, then? [All: They're not here.] I can see that. What's the matter with them? [All: Don't know.] + +00:07:10.000 --> 00:07:13.000 + +Perhaps they've got flu. + +00:07:13.000 --> 00:07:35.000 + +Flu… flu? They should eat more fresh fruit. [tic] Right. Now, self-defence. Tonight I shall be carrying on from where we got to last week when I was showing you how to defend yourselves against anyone who attacks you… armed with a piece of fresh fruit. + +00:07:35.000 --> 00:07:41.000 + +[disappointed] Oh. + +00:07:41.000 --> 00:07:44.000 + +You promised you wouldn't do fruit this week. + +00:07:44.000 --> 00:07:46.000 + +What do you mean? + +00:07:46.000 --> 00:07:49.000 + +We've done fruit the last nine weeks. + +00:07:49.000 --> 00:07:58.000 + +What's wrong with fruit? You think you know it all, eh? + +00:07:58.000 --> 00:08:02.000 + +But couldn't we do something else, for a change? + +00:08:02.000 --> 00:08:05.000 + +Like someone who attacks you with a pointed stick? + +00:08:05.000 --> 00:08:29.000 + +[scornful] Pointed sticks? Ho, ho, ho. We want to learn how to defend ourselves against pointed sticks, do we? Getting all high and mighty, eh? Fresh fruit not good enough for you eh? Well I'll tell you something my lad. When you're walking home tonight and some great homicidal maniac comes after you with a bunch of loganberries, don't come crying to me! Now, the passion fruit. When your assailant lunges at you with a passion fruit, thus… [demonstrates] + +00:08:29.000 --> 00:08:36.000 + +We've done the passion fruit. — What? — We've done the passion fruit. + +00:08:36.000 --> 00:08:46.000 + +We done oranges, apples, grapefruits. — Whole and segments. — Pomegranates, greengages. — Grapes, passion fruit. — Lemons. — Plums. — Yes, and mangoes in syrup. + +00:08:46.000 --> 00:08:55.000 + +How about cherries? — We done them. — Red and black? — Yes. + +00:08:55.000 --> 00:09:10.000 + +All right then… bananas! — Oh. — We haven't done them, have we? — No. — Right! Bananas! How to defend yourself against a man armed with a banana. Here, you, take this. [action] Throws banana. + +00:09:10.000 --> 00:09:24.000 + +Now, it's quite simple to defend yourself against the banana fiend. First of all, you force him to drop the banana, next, you eat the banana, thus disarming him. You have now rendered him helpless. + +00:09:24.000 --> 00:09:28.000 + +Suppose he's got a bunch. — Shut up! + +00:09:28.000 --> 00:09:31.000 + +Supposing he's got a pointed stick. — Shut up. Right now you, Mr Apricot. — Harrison. + +00:09:31.000 --> 00:09:56.000 + +Harrison, Mr. Harrison. Come at me with that banana then. Come on attack me with it. As hard as you like. Come on. [Harrison charges, shouting] No no no. Put something into it… Scream… come on… [action] RSM draws a revolver and fires in Harrison's face. Harrison falls dead. RSM pockets gun and walks to banana. Now… I eat the banana. + +00:09:56.000 --> 00:10:05.000 + +[action] Class gathers around the body. You shot him. He's dead… dead. He's completely dead. You've shot him. + +00:10:05.000 --> 00:10:12.000 + +[finishing the banana] I have now eaten the banana. The deceased Mr Apricot is now disarmed. + +00:10:12.000 --> 00:10:22.000 + +You shot him. You shot him dead. — Well, he was attacking me with a banana. — Well, you told him to. + +00:10:22.000 --> 00:10:30.000 + +Look, I'm only doing me job. I have to show you how to defend yourselves against fresh fruit. — And pointed sticks. — Shut up. + +00:10:30.000 --> 00:10:38.000 + +Supposing someone came at you with a banana and you haven't got a gun? — Run for it. + +00:10:38.000 --> 00:10:46.000 + +You could stand and scream for help. — You try that with a pineapple down your windpipe. + +00:10:46.000 --> 00:11:09.000 + +[jumps, nervous] Where? Where? — Nowhere. I was just saying pineapple. — Oh blimey. I thought my number was on that one. — What, on the pineapple? — [jumps] Where? Where? — No, I was just repeating it. + +00:11:09.000 --> 00:11:22.000 + +Oh. Oh. Right. That's the banana then. Next… the raspberry. [action] Produces one. Harmless looking thing, isn't it? Now you, Mr Tinned Peach… — Thompson. + +00:11:22.000 --> 00:11:40.000 + +Mr Thompson, come at me with that raspberry then. Come on, be as vicious as you like with it. — No. — Why not? — You'll shoot me. — I won't. — You shot Mr. Harrison. — That was self-defence. Come on. I promise I won't shoot you. + +00:11:40.000 --> 00:11:52.000 + +You promised you'd tell us about pointed sticks. — Shut up. Now. Brandish that… raspberry. Come on, be as vicious as you like with it. + +00:11:52.000 --> 00:12:12.000 + +No. Throw the gun away. — I haven't got a gun. — Oh yes, you have. — I haven't. — You have. You shot Mr Harrison with it. — Oh… that gun. — Throw it away. — All right. [action] He throws it. How to defend yourself against a raspberry, without a gun. + +00:12:12.000 --> 00:12:28.000 + +You were going to shoot me! — I wasn't. — You were. — Wasn't. Come on, you worm… miserable little man. Come at me then… do your worst, you worm. [action] He pulls a lever; a sixteen-ton weight drops on Third Man. + +00:12:28.000 --> 00:12:42.000 + +If anyone ever attacks you with a raspberry, simply pull the lever… and a sixteen-ton weight will drop on his head. I learnt that in Malaya. + +00:12:42.000 --> 00:12:56.000 + +Suppose you haven't got a sixteen-ton weight? — Well that's planning, isn't it? Forethought. — How many sixteen-ton weights are there? — Look… the sixteen-ton weight is just one way… there are millions of others! — Like what? — Shoot him. + +00:12:56.000 --> 00:13:12.000 + +Well, supposing you haven't got a gun or a sixteen-ton weight? — All right clever dick… You two, come at me with raspberries, there you are, a whole basket each. Come on. + +00:13:12.000 --> 00:13:28.000 + +No gun? — No. — No sixteen-ton weight? — No. — No pointed stick? — Shut up. — No rocks up in the ceiling? — No. — You won't kill us. — I won't kill you. — Promise. — I promise I won't kill you. + +00:13:28.000 --> 00:13:56.000 + +Right, now don't rush me this time. I'm going to turn me back. So you can stalk me… right. Come up as quietly as you can, close up behind me, then, in with the raspberries, right? Start moving… [action] They creep up. Now—the first thing to do when you are being stalked by an ugly mob with raspberries, is to… release the tiger. [action] He presses a button; a tiger charges past toward them; roars and cries. + +00:13:56.000 --> 00:14:24.000 + +The great advantage of the tiger in unarmed combat is that it not only eats the raspberry-laden foe but also the raspberries. The tiger, however, do not relish the peach. The peach assailant should be attacked with a crocodile. [action] He eyes the room. Right… I know you're there—lurking under the floorboards with your damsons and your prunes… the rest of you—behind the wall bars with your quinces. Well I'm ready for you. I've wired myself up to two hundred tons of gelignite… if any one of you tries anything we'll all go up together! I've warned you… right. That's it… + +00:14:24.000 --> 00:14:30.000 +[action] Big explosion. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_04__Owl-stretching_time/7_Secret_Service_dentists.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_04__Owl-stretching_time/7_Secret_Service_dentists.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..d89de84a --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_04__Owl-stretching_time/7_Secret_Service_dentists.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,224 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit begins at anchor #7: Bookshop spy caper with dental espionage; Arthur Lemming of the BDA + +00:14:30.000 --> 00:14:38.000 +[action] Cut to bookshop. Bookseller behind counter. Arthur enters; Bookseller jumps and looks furtive. + +00:14:38.000 --> 00:14:41.000 + +Er… oh! + +00:14:41.000 --> 00:14:45.000 + +Good morning, I'd like to buy a book please. + +00:14:45.000 --> 00:14:52.000 + +Oh, well I'm afraid we don't have any. [action] Tries to hide them. + +00:14:52.000 --> 00:14:54.000 + +I'm sorry? + +00:14:54.000 --> 00:15:02.000 + +We don't have any books. We're fresh out of them. Good morning. + +00:15:02.000 --> 00:15:05.000 + +Well what are all these? + +00:15:05.000 --> 00:15:13.000 + +All what? Oh! All these, ah ah ha ha. You're referring to these … books. + +00:15:13.000 --> 00:15:15.000 + +Yes. + +00:15:15.000 --> 00:15:20.000 + +They're um … they're all sold. Good morning. + +00:15:20.000 --> 00:15:24.000 + +What all of them? + +00:15:24.000 --> 00:15:30.000 + +Every single man Jack of them. Not a single one of them in an unsold state. Good morning. + +00:15:30.000 --> 00:15:33.000 + +Who to? + +00:15:33.000 --> 00:15:38.000 + +What? — Who are they sold to? + +00:15:38.000 --> 00:15:50.000 + +Oh … various … good Lord is that the time? Oh my goodness I must close for lunch. — It's only half past ten. — Ah yes, well I feel rather peckish… I don't expect I'll open again today. I think I'll have a really good feed. + +00:15:50.000 --> 00:16:05.000 + +I say! Look at that lovely bookshop just across the road there, they've got a much better selection than we've got, probably at ridiculously low prices… just across the road there. [action] He opens door. Good morning. — But I was told to come here. + +00:16:05.000 --> 00:16:20.000 + +[action] Bundling him back in. Well. Well, I see. Er… [carefully] hear the gooseberries are doing well this year… and so are the mangoes. [winks] — I'm sorry? + +00:16:20.000 --> 00:16:34.000 + +Er… oh… thinking of the weather… I hear the gooseberries are doing well this year… and so are the mangoes. — Mine aren't. — [nodding keenly] Go on… — What? — Go on - mine aren't … but… + +00:16:34.000 --> 00:16:46.000 + +What? — Aren't you going to say something about 'mine aren't but the Big Cheese gets his at low tide tonight'? — No. + +00:16:46.000 --> 00:16:58.000 + +Oh, ah, good morning— [stops] Wait. Who sent you? — The little old lady in the sweet shop. — She didn't have a duelling scar here… and a hook? — No. + +00:16:58.000 --> 00:17:08.000 + +Of course not, I was thinking of somebody else. Good morning. — Wait a minute, there's something going on here. — [spins] What, where? You didn't see anything did you? + +00:17:08.000 --> 00:17:18.000 + +No, but I think there's something going on here. — No no, well there's nothing going on here at all [shouts off] and he didn't see anything. Good morning. + +00:17:18.000 --> 00:17:31.000 + +[coming back in] There is something going on. — Look there is nothing going on. Please believe me, there is abso… [a hand appears; Bookseller frantically waves it away] …lutely nothing going on. Is there anything going on? + +00:17:31.000 --> 00:17:36.000 +[action] A man appears briefly. + +00:17:36.000 --> 00:17:39.000 + +No there's nothing going on. [action] Disappears. + +00:17:39.000 --> 00:17:43.000 + +See there's nothing going on. — Who was that? + +00:17:43.000 --> 00:17:50.000 + +That was my aunt, look what was this book you wanted then? Quickly! Quickly! — Oh, well, I'd like to buy a copy of an 'Illustrated History of False Teeth'. + +00:17:50.000 --> 00:17:54.000 + +My God you've got guts. — What? + +00:17:54.000 --> 00:18:01.000 + +[action] Pulls gun. Just how much do you know? — What about? + +00:18:01.000 --> 00:18:08.000 + +Are you from the British Dental Association? — No I'm a tobacconist. — Get away from that door. — I'll just go over the other… — Stay where you are. You'll never leave this bookshop alive. — Why not? — You know too much, my dental friend. — I don't know anything. — Come clean. You're a dentist aren't you. — No, I'm a tobacconist. — A tobacconist who just happens to be buying a book on… teeth? — Yes. — Ha ha ha ha… + +00:18:08.000 --> 00:18:14.000 +[action] Lafarge enters with a gun, swarthy and menacing. + +00:18:14.000 --> 00:18:18.000 + +Drop that gun, Stapleton. + +00:18:18.000 --> 00:18:22.000 + +Lafarge! [action] He drops the gun. — There is something going on. — No there isn't. + +00:18:22.000 --> 00:18:32.000 + +OK Stapleton, this is it. Where's Mahoney hidden the fillings? — What fillings? — You know which fillings, Stapleton. Upper right two and four, lower right three and two lower left one. Come on. [threatens] Remember what happened to Nigel. — What happened to Nigel? — Orthodontic Jake gave him a gelignite mouth wash. + +00:18:32.000 --> 00:18:38.000 + +I knew there was something going on. — Well there isn't. — Come on Stapleton. The fillings! — They're at 22 Wimpole Street. — Don't play games with me! [action] Pokes his eye. — Oh, oh, 22a Wimpole Street. — That's better. — But you'll need an appointment. — OK— Brian! Make with the appointment baby. No gas. + +00:18:38.000 --> 00:18:48.000 +[action] Van der Berg appears with a machine gun and a nurse (dressed as dental staff with flashy accessories). + +00:18:48.000 --> 00:18:56.000 + +Not so fast Lafarge! — Van der Berg! — Yes. Now drop the roscoe. + +00:18:56.000 --> 00:19:04.000 + +There is something going on. — No there isn't. — Get the guns. [action] Nurse retrieves guns, places on tray, covers with white cloth, returns it. + +00:19:04.000 --> 00:19:18.000 + +Who's that? — That's Van der Berg. He's on our side. — All right, get up against the wall Lafarge, and you too Stapleton. — Me? — Yes, you! — You dirty double-crossing rat. — [going with Bookseller] What's happened? — He's two-timed me. — Bad luck. + +00:19:18.000 --> 00:19:24.000 + +All right … where are the fillings? Answer me, where are they? — This is quite exciting. + +00:19:24.000 --> 00:19:31.000 +[action] Brian enters with a bazooka, dressed in operating theatre gear. + +00:19:31.000 --> 00:19:51.000 + +Not so fast. — Brian! — [all] Brian! — Ooh, what's that? — It's a bazooka. — All right. Get against the wall Van der Berg … and you nurse. And the first one to try anything moves to a practice six feet underground … this is an anti-tank gun … and it's loaded … and you've just got five seconds to tell me … whatever happened to Baby Jane? + +00:19:51.000 --> 00:20:10.000 + +What? — Oh … I'm sorry … my mind was wandering … I've had a terrible day… I really have … you've got five seconds to tell me… I've forgotten. I've forgotten. — The five seconds haven't started yet have they? — Only we don't know the question. — Was it about Vogler? — No, no… no … you've got five seconds to tell me… — About Nigel? — No. — Bronski? — No. No. — The fillings! + +00:20:10.000 --> 00:20:32.000 + +Oh yes, the fillings, of course. How stupid of me. Right, you've got five seconds … [clears throat] Where are the fillings? Five, four, three, two, one, Zero! [pause; he has forgotten to fire] Zero! [looks at gun] Oh! I've forgotten to fire it. Sorry. Silly day. Very well. [rapidly] Five, four, three, two, one. + +00:20:32.000 --> 00:20:40.000 +[action] A panel slides back. The Big Cheese appears seated in a dentist's chair, wearing magnifying glasses, stroking a rabbit on his lap. + +00:20:40.000 --> 00:20:43.000 + +Drop the bazooka Brian. + +00:20:43.000 --> 00:20:48.000 + +[all] The Big Cheese! [action] Brian drops the bazooka. + +00:20:48.000 --> 00:21:18.000 + +I'm glad you could all come to my little … party. And Flopsy's glad too, aren't you, Flopsy? [holds up rabbit; no reply] Aren't you Flopsy? [no reply; he pulls a big revolver and fires point-blank at the rabbit] That'll teach you to play hard to get. There, poor Flopsy's dead. And never called me mother. And soon … you will all be dead, dead, dead, dead. [crowd hisses] And because I'm so evil you'll all die the slow way … under the drill. + +00:21:18.000 --> 00:21:22.000 + +It's one o'clock. — So it is. Lunch break, everyone back here at two. + +00:21:22.000 --> 00:21:30.000 +[action] Everyone relaxes and walks off. Arthur surreptitiously goes to a telephone and calls. + +00:21:30.000 --> 00:21:36.000 + +Hallo … give me the British Dental Association … and fast. + +00:21:36.000 --> 00:21:50.000 +[action] Cut to Arthur, now a dentist, leaning over a patient in a chair; he looks to camera. + +00:21:50.000 --> 00:22:18.000 + +You see, I knew there was something going on. Of course, the Big Cheese made two mistakes. First of all he didn't recognize me: Lemming, Arthur Lemming, Special Investigator, British Dental Association, and second … [to patient] spit … by the time I got back from lunch I had every dental surgeon in SW1 waiting for them all in the broom cupboard. Funny isn't it, how naughty dentists always make that one fatal mistake. Bye for now … keep your teeth clean. + +00:22:18.000 --> 00:22:30.000 +[action] Photo of Arthur Lemming. Caption: 'LEMMING OF THE BDA'. Over it a song plays. + +00:22:30.000 --> 00:22:40.000 +[singing VO] Lemming, Lemming … Lemming of the BDA .. Lemming, Lemming … Lemming of the BD … Lemming of the BD … BD, BDA. + +00:22:40.000 --> 00:22:48.000 +[caption] IT'S A MAN'S LIFE IN THE BRITISH DENTAL ASSOCIATION + +00:22:48.000 --> 00:22:56.000 +[action] Colonel knocks the photo aside. + +00:22:56.000 --> 00:23:06.000 + +Right! No, I warned you, no, I warned you about the slogan, right. That's the end. Stop the programme! Stop it. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_05__Man's_crisis_of_identity_in_the_latter_half_of_the_twentieth_century/0_Episode5_head_tail.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_05__Man's_crisis_of_identity_in_the_latter_half_of_the_twentieth_century/0_Episode5_head_tail.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..79e2ff01 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_05__Man's_crisis_of_identity_in_the_latter_half_of_the_twentieth_century/0_Episode5_head_tail.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,20 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Includes cold open 'It's…', main title, and end credits caption. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 +[rowboat approaches on river] + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:06.500 + +It's… + +00:00:06.500 --> 00:00:10.000 +[CAPTION: 'MONTY PYTHON'S FLYING CIRCUS'] + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:14.000 +[Title animation] + +00:28:00.000 --> 00:28:05.000 +[CAPTION: '"MAN'S CRISIS OF IDENTITY IN THE LATTER HALF OF THE 20TH CENTURY" WAS CONCEIVED, WRITTEN AND PERFORMED BY… (CREDITS)] + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_05__Man's_crisis_of_identity_in_the_latter_half_of_the_twentieth_century/10_Careers_advisory_board.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_05__Man's_crisis_of_identity_in_the_latter_half_of_the_twentieth_century/10_Careers_advisory_board.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..ad94f58b --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_05__Man's_crisis_of_identity_in_the_latter_half_of_the_twentieth_century/10_Careers_advisory_board.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,11 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Skit starts at anchor #10. + +00:16:45.000 --> 00:16:48.000 +[Cut to man sitting at desk.] + +00:16:48.000 --> 00:17:08.000 + +Well that was all good fun… but you'd never be treated like that if you had an interview here at the Careers Advisory Board. Perhaps I should introduce myself. I am the Head of the Careers Advisory Board. I wanted to be a doctor, but there we are… Or a sculptor… or an engineer… but there we are… I'm the Head of this lousy Board. [weeps, then recovers] Never mind, now I wonder if you've ever considered what a very profitable line of work this man is in. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_05__Man's_crisis_of_identity_in_the_latter_half_of_the_twentieth_century/11_Burglar_encyclopedia_salesman.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_05__Man's_crisis_of_identity_in_the_latter_half_of_the_twentieth_century/11_Burglar_encyclopedia_salesman.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..093ae69e --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_05__Man's_crisis_of_identity_in_the_latter_half_of_the_twentieth_century/11_Burglar_encyclopedia_salesman.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,91 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Skit starts at anchor #11. + +00:17:12.000 --> 00:17:15.000 +[Front door of a flat. A smartly dressed man rings the bell.] + +00:17:15.000 --> 00:17:19.000 + +Burglar! [rings again] Burglar! + +00:17:19.000 --> 00:17:20.500 + +Yes? + +00:17:20.500 --> 00:17:22.500 + +Burglar, madam. + +00:17:22.500 --> 00:17:24.000 + +What do you want? + +00:17:24.000 --> 00:17:26.000 + +I want to come in and steal a few things, madam. + +00:17:26.000 --> 00:17:28.500 + +Are you an encydopaedia salesman? + +00:17:28.500 --> 00:17:31.000 + +No madam, I'm a burglar, I burgle people. + +00:17:31.000 --> 00:17:33.000 + +I think you're an encyclopaedia salesman. + +00:17:33.000 --> 00:17:35.000 + +Oh I'm not, open the door, let me in please. + +00:17:35.000 --> 00:17:37.500 + +If I let you in you'll sell me encyclopaedias. + +00:17:37.500 --> 00:17:40.000 + +I won't, madam. I just want to come in and ransack the flat. Honestly. + +00:17:40.000 --> 00:17:42.000 + +Promise. No encyclopaedias? + +00:17:42.000 --> 00:17:43.500 + +None at all. + +00:17:43.500 --> 00:17:46.000 + +All right. [opens door] You'd better come in then. + +00:17:46.000 --> 00:17:48.000 +[Man enters through the door.] + +00:17:48.000 --> 00:17:54.000 + +Mind you I don't know whether you've really considered the advantages of owning a really fine set of modern encyclopaedias… [pockets valuable] You know, they can really do you wonders. + +00:17:54.000 --> 00:17:56.500 +[Cut back to man at desk.] + +00:17:56.500 --> 00:18:02.000 + +That man was a successful encyclopaedia salesman. But not all encyclopaedia salesmen are successful. Here is an unsuccessful encyclopaedia salesman. + +00:18:02.000 --> 00:18:05.000 +[Very tall building; a body flies from a high window and plummets.] + +00:18:05.000 --> 00:18:08.000 + +Now here are two unsuccessful encyclopaedia salesmen. + +00:18:08.000 --> 00:18:11.000 +[Different tall building; two bodies fly out.] + +00:18:11.000 --> 00:18:13.500 + +I think there's a lesson there for all of us. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_05__Man's_crisis_of_identity_in_the_latter_half_of_the_twentieth_century/1_Confuse-a-Cat.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_05__Man's_crisis_of_identity_in_the_latter_half_of_the_twentieth_century/1_Confuse-a-Cat.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..05e7777e --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_05__Man's_crisis_of_identity_in_the_latter_half_of_the_twentieth_century/1_Confuse-a-Cat.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,210 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Skit starts at anchor #1. + +00:01:00.000 --> 00:01:03.000 +[SUPERIMPOSED CAPTION: 'SUBURBAN LOUNGE NEAR ESHER'] + +00:01:03.000 --> 00:01:09.000 +[Elderly couple stare through french windows at a motionless cat on the lawn. A car pulls up outside.] + +00:01:09.000 --> 00:01:12.000 + +Oh good, that'll be the Vet, dear. + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:14.500 + +I'd better go and let him in. + +00:01:14.500 --> 00:01:18.000 +[Mrs B exits and returns with the Vet.] + +00:01:18.000 --> 00:01:21.000 + +[stage whisper] It's the Vet, dear. + +00:01:21.000 --> 00:01:24.000 + +Oh very glad indeed you could come round, sir. + +00:01:24.000 --> 00:01:28.000 + +Not at all. Now what seems to be the problem? You can tell me - I'm a Vet, you know. + +00:01:28.000 --> 00:01:29.800 + +See! Tell him, dear. + +00:01:29.800 --> 00:01:31.500 + +Well… + +00:01:31.500 --> 00:01:35.000 + +It's our cat. He doesn't do anything. He just sits out there on the lawn. + +00:01:35.000 --> 00:01:36.800 + +Is he … dead? + +00:01:36.800 --> 00:01:38.500 + +Oh, no! + +00:01:38.500 --> 00:01:44.000 + +[to camera, dramatically] Thank God for that. For one ghastly moment I thought I was… too late. If only more people would call in the nick of time. + +00:01:44.000 --> 00:01:47.000 + +He just sits there, all day and every day. + +00:01:47.000 --> 00:01:48.500 + +And at night. + +00:01:48.500 --> 00:01:52.000 + +Sh! Almost motionless. We have to take his food out to him. + +00:01:52.000 --> 00:01:53.500 + +And his milk. + +00:01:53.500 --> 00:01:56.000 + +Sh! He doesn't do anything. He just sits there. + +00:01:56.000 --> 00:01:58.500 + +Are you at your wits' end? + +00:01:58.500 --> 00:02:00.500 + +Definitely, yes. + +00:02:00.500 --> 00:02:14.000 + +[puts on spectacles; sits; crosses legs; fingertips together] … your cat is suffering from what we Vets haven't found a word for. Total physical inertia, absence of interest in its environment, failure to respond to conventional stimuli… To be blunt, your cat is in a rut. It's the old stockbroker syndrome… ennui, angst, weltschmertz… + +00:02:14.000 --> 00:02:15.500 + +Moping. + +00:02:15.500 --> 00:02:21.000 + +In a way… moping, I must remember that. Now, what's to be done? Tell me sir, have you confused your cat recently? + +00:02:21.000 --> 00:02:22.500 + +Well we … + +00:02:22.500 --> 00:02:23.800 + +Sh! No. + +00:02:23.800 --> 00:02:27.500 + +Yes … well I can definitely say that your cat badly needs to be confused. + +00:02:27.500 --> 00:02:28.800 + +What? + +00:02:28.800 --> 00:02:30.000 + +Sh! What? + +00:02:30.000 --> 00:02:36.000 + +Confused. To shake it out of its state of complacency. I'm afraid I'm not personally qualified to confuse cats, but I can recommend an extremely good service. Here is their card. + +00:02:36.000 --> 00:02:39.000 + +[reading card] Oooh. 'Confuse-a-Cat Limited'. + +00:02:39.000 --> 00:02:41.000 + +'Confuse-a-Cat Limited'. + +00:02:41.000 --> 00:02:42.000 + +Oh. + +00:02:42.000 --> 00:02:47.000 +[A large van arrives: 'Confuse-a-Cat Limited: Europe's leading cat-confusing service…'] + +00:02:47.000 --> 00:02:51.000 + +Squad! Eyes front! Stand at ease. Cat confusers …shun! + +00:02:51.000 --> 00:02:54.000 +[A general alights from a following car.] + +00:02:54.000 --> 00:02:59.000 + +Well men, we've got a pretty difficult cat to confuse today so let's get straight on with it. Jolly good. Thank you sergeant. + +00:02:59.000 --> 00:03:05.000 + +Confusers attend to the van and fetch out… wait for it… fetch out the funny things. Move, move, move. One, two, one, two, get those funny things off. + +00:03:05.000 --> 00:03:10.000 +[A proscenium with curtains is erected before the cat. All stand ready.] + +00:03:10.000 --> 00:03:12.000 + +Stage ready for confusing, sir! + +00:03:12.000 --> 00:03:14.000 + +Very good. Carry on, sergeant. + +00:03:14.000 --> 00:03:16.000 + +Left turn, double march! + +00:03:16.000 --> 00:03:18.500 + +Right men, confuse the … cat! + +00:03:18.500 --> 00:03:22.000 +[Drum roll and cymbals. Curtains open to an amazing show of visual tricks.] + +00:03:22.000 --> 00:03:24.500 + +My lords, ladies and Gedderbong. + +00:03:24.500 --> 00:04:10.000 +[Surreal revue with boxers, changing hats, Napoleon, penguin on a pogo stick, dustbins, traffic policeman, cannon, raw chicken, bows, vanishings. Cutaways to unimpressed cat.] + +00:04:10.000 --> 00:04:13.000 + +I hope to God it works. Anyway, we shall know any minute now. + +00:04:13.000 --> 00:04:17.000 +[After a pause, the cat gets up and walks into the house. A and B are overjoyed.] + +00:04:17.000 --> 00:04:19.000 + +I can't believe it. + +00:04:19.000 --> 00:04:21.500 + +Neither can I. It's just like the old days. + +00:04:21.500 --> 00:04:23.500 + +Then he's cured. Oh thank you, general. + +00:04:23.500 --> 00:04:25.500 + +What can we ever do to repay you? + +00:04:25.500 --> 00:04:28.000 + +No need to, sir. It's all in a day's work for 'Confuse-a-Cat'. + +00:04:28.000 --> 00:04:34.000 +[Freeze frame on the General. CAPTION: 'Confuse-a-Cat Limited' and rolling mock credits: AMAZE-A-VOLE LTD… DISTRACT-A-BEE.] + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_05__Man's_crisis_of_identity_in_the_latter_half_of_the_twentieth_century/2_The_smuggler.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_05__Man's_crisis_of_identity_in_the_latter_half_of_the_twentieth_century/2_The_smuggler.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..0b5a1ddf --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_05__Man's_crisis_of_identity_in_the_latter_half_of_the_twentieth_century/2_The_smuggler.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,153 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Skit starts at anchor #2. + +00:05:00.000 --> 00:05:05.000 +[ANIMATION leads into a customs hall.] + +00:05:05.000 --> 00:05:07.500 + +Have you read this, sir? [holds up notice] + +00:05:07.500 --> 00:05:10.000 + +No! Oh, yes, yes - yes. + +00:05:10.000 --> 00:05:12.000 + +Anything to declare? + +00:05:12.000 --> 00:05:16.000 + +Yes … no! No! No! No! Nothing to declare, no, nothing in my suitcase no… + +00:05:16.000 --> 00:05:18.500 + +No watches, cameras, radio sets? + +00:05:18.500 --> 00:05:24.000 + +Oh yes … four watches … no, no, no. No. One… one watch… No, no. Not even one watch. No, no watches at all. No precision watches, no. + +00:05:24.000 --> 00:05:26.500 + +Which country have you been visiting, sir? + +00:05:26.500 --> 00:05:35.000 + +Switzerland … er … no … not Switzerland … it began with S but it wasn't Switzerland… what's the name of that country where they don't make watches at all? + +00:05:35.000 --> 00:05:36.500 + +Spain? + +00:05:36.500 --> 00:05:38.500 + +Spain! That's it. Spain, yes, mm. + +00:05:38.500 --> 00:05:41.000 + +The label says 'Zurich', sir. + +00:05:41.000 --> 00:05:43.000 + +Yes well … it was Spain then. + +00:05:43.000 --> 00:05:45.000 + +Zurich's in Switzerland, sir. + +00:05:45.000 --> 00:05:47.000 + +Switzerland, yes mm … mm … yes. + +00:05:47.000 --> 00:05:49.500 + +Switzerland - where they make the watches. + +00:05:49.500 --> 00:05:51.000 + +Oh, nice shed you've got here. + +00:05:51.000 --> 00:05:53.000 + +Have you, er, got any Swiss currency, sir? + +00:05:53.000 --> 00:05:58.000 + +No… just the watches… er just my watch… I've kept a watch on the currency… and I haven't got any. + +00:05:58.000 --> 00:06:02.000 + +That came out a bit glib didn't it? [alarm clock goes off inside case] + +00:06:02.000 --> 00:06:04.500 + +No, no, heavens no, no… just vests. [thumps case; alarm stops] + +00:06:04.500 --> 00:06:06.500 + +Sounded a bit like an alarm going off. + +00:06:06.500 --> 00:06:08.500 + +Well it can't have been… it must be a vest, er, going off. + +00:06:08.500 --> 00:06:11.500 +[clocks start ticking and chiming in the case] + +00:06:11.500 --> 00:06:17.000 + +All right, I confess, I'm a smuggler … This whole case is crammed full of Swiss watches and clocks… I've been a bloody fool. + +00:06:17.000 --> 00:06:18.800 + +I don't believe you, sir. + +00:06:18.800 --> 00:06:21.000 + +It's true. I'm, er, guilty of smuggling. + +00:06:21.000 --> 00:06:25.000 + +Don't give me that, sir … you couldn't smuggle a piece of greaseproof paper let alone a case full of watches. + +00:06:25.000 --> 00:06:31.000 + +What do you mean! I've smuggled watches before! I've smuggled bombs, cameras, microfilms, aircraft components, you name it - I've smuggled it. + +00:06:31.000 --> 00:06:34.000 + +Now come along please, you're wasting our time… move along please. + +00:06:34.000 --> 00:06:37.000 + +Look! [opens case stuffed with watches and clocks] Look - look at this. + +00:06:37.000 --> 00:06:41.000 + +Look, for all I know, sir, you could've bought these in London before you ever went to Switzerland. + +00:06:41.000 --> 00:06:43.000 + +What? I wouldn't buy two thousand clocks. + +00:06:43.000 --> 00:06:47.000 + +People do, now close your case move along please. We're out to catch the real smugglers. + +00:06:47.000 --> 00:06:52.000 + +[shouting] I am a real smuggler… I'm a lawbreaker… a smuggler. [he is removed struggling] + +00:06:52.000 --> 00:06:54.000 +[A vicar steps up.] + +00:06:54.000 --> 00:06:56.000 + +Poor fellow. I think he needs help. + +00:06:56.000 --> 00:06:59.000 + +Right, cut the wisecracks, vicar. Get to the search room, and strip. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_05__Man's_crisis_of_identity_in_the_latter_half_of_the_twentieth_century/3_A_duck,_a_cat_and_a_lizard_(discussion).vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_05__Man's_crisis_of_identity_in_the_latter_half_of_the_twentieth_century/3_A_duck,_a_cat_and_a_lizard_(discussion).vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..1779ff68 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_05__Man's_crisis_of_identity_in_the_latter_half_of_the_twentieth_century/3_A_duck,_a_cat_and_a_lizard_(discussion).vtt @@ -0,0 +1,39 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Skit starts at anchor #3. + +00:07:20.000 --> 00:07:24.000 +[Cut to studio discussion set with a chairman and three animals.] + +00:07:24.000 --> 00:07:40.000 + +Well to discuss the implications of that sketch and to consider the moral problems raised by the law-enforcement methods involved we have a duck, a cat and a lizard. Now first of all… lizard: how effective do you consider the legal weapons employed by customs officers nowadays? + +00:07:40.000 --> 00:07:43.000 +[silence; shot of lizard] + +00:07:43.000 --> 00:07:58.000 + +While you're thinking about that, I'd like to bring the duck in here, and ask her to clarify currency restrictions and customs regulations today. + +00:07:58.000 --> 00:08:01.000 +[silence; shot of duck] + +00:08:01.000 --> 00:08:06.000 + +Perhaps the cat would rather answer that? + +00:08:06.000 --> 00:08:08.500 +[silence; shot of cat] + +00:08:08.500 --> 00:08:12.000 + +No? Lizard? + +00:08:12.000 --> 00:08:15.000 +[silence; shot of lizard again] + +00:08:15.000 --> 00:08:18.000 + +Well, let's ask the man in the street what he thinks. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_05__Man's_crisis_of_identity_in_the_latter_half_of_the_twentieth_century/4_Vox_pops_on_smuggling.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_05__Man's_crisis_of_identity_in_the_latter_half_of_the_twentieth_century/4_Vox_pops_on_smuggling.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..87ad2704 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_05__Man's_crisis_of_identity_in_the_latter_half_of_the_twentieth_century/4_Vox_pops_on_smuggling.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,54 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Skit starts at anchor #4. + +00:08:20.000 --> 00:08:23.000 +[Cut to vox pops montage.] + +00:08:23.000 --> 00:08:25.500 + +I am not a man you silly billy. + +00:08:25.500 --> 00:08:28.000 + +I'm not in the street you fairy. + +00:08:28.000 --> 00:08:32.000 + +Well, er, speaking as a man in the street— [a car runs him over] Wagh! + +00:08:32.000 --> 00:08:34.000 + +What was the question again? + +00:08:34.000 --> 00:08:40.000 + +Just how relevant are contemporary customs regulations and currency restrictions in a modern expanding industrial economy? … Oh never mind. + +00:08:40.000 --> 00:08:44.000 + +Well I think customs men should be armed, so they can kill people carrying more than two hundred cigarettes. + +00:08:44.000 --> 00:08:56.000 + +[getting up from a deckchair, raging] … nobody who has gone abroad should be allowed back… I don't eat squirrels do I? … It's a free country. [a knight in armour enters] + +00:08:56.000 --> 00:08:59.000 +[The knight slams him in the stomach with a raw chicken.] + +00:08:59.000 --> 00:09:02.000 + +I think it's silly to ask a lizard what it thinks, anyway. + +00:09:02.000 --> 00:09:03.500 + +[off] Why? + +00:09:03.500 --> 00:09:06.000 + +I mean they should have asked Margaret Drabble. + +00:09:06.000 --> 00:09:10.000 + +Well I think, er, customs people are quite necessary, and I think they're doing quite a good job really. Check. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_05__Man's_crisis_of_identity_in_the_latter_half_of_the_twentieth_century/5_Police_raid.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_05__Man's_crisis_of_identity_in_the_latter_half_of_the_twentieth_century/5_Police_raid.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..3887abaa --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_05__Man's_crisis_of_identity_in_the_latter_half_of_the_twentieth_century/5_Police_raid.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,95 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Skit starts at anchor #5. + +00:09:12.000 --> 00:09:16.000 +[Two young men play chess in a flat. Tremendous battering and clattering at the door.] + +00:09:16.000 --> 00:09:17.500 + +Door's open. + +00:09:17.500 --> 00:09:24.000 + +Oh. Yes. All right. My name's Police Constable Henry Thatcher, and this is a raid. I have reason to believe there are certain substances on the premises. + +00:09:24.000 --> 00:09:26.000 + +Well what sort of substances, officer? + +00:09:26.000 --> 00:09:28.000 + +Er… certain substances. + +00:09:28.000 --> 00:09:30.000 + +Well, what sort of certain substances? + +00:09:30.000 --> 00:09:32.000 + +Er, certain substances of an illicit nature. + +00:09:32.000 --> 00:09:34.000 + +Er, could you be more specific? + +00:09:34.000 --> 00:09:35.500 + +I beg your pardon? + +00:09:35.500 --> 00:09:37.000 + +Could you be 'clearer'. + +00:09:37.000 --> 00:09:40.000 + +Oh, oh … yes, er … certain substances on the premises. To be removed for clinical tests. + +00:09:40.000 --> 00:09:42.500 + +Have you got anything particular in mind? + +00:09:42.500 --> 00:09:44.000 + +Well what have you got? + +00:09:44.000 --> 00:09:45.500 + +Nothing, officer. + +00:09:45.500 --> 00:09:47.500 + +You are Sandy Camp the actor? + +00:09:47.500 --> 00:09:48.800 + +Yes. + +00:09:48.800 --> 00:09:55.000 + +I must warn you, sir, that outside I have police dog Josephine, who is not only armed, and trained to sniff out certain substances, but is also a junkie. + +00:09:55.000 --> 00:09:56.500 + +What are you after … ? + +00:09:56.500 --> 00:10:04.000 + +[very obviously produces a brown paper package] Oo! … Here is a brown paper bag I have found on the premises. I must confiscate this for clinical examination. + +00:10:04.000 --> 00:10:06.500 + +Wait a minute. You just got that out of your pocket. + +00:10:06.500 --> 00:10:07.800 + +What? + +00:10:07.800 --> 00:10:11.000 + +[opens bag] Well what's in it anyway? … Sandwiches. + +00:10:11.000 --> 00:10:13.000 + +Sandwiches? Blimey. Whatever did I give the wife? + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_05__Man's_crisis_of_identity_in_the_latter_half_of_the_twentieth_century/6_Letters_and_vox_pops.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_05__Man's_crisis_of_identity_in_the_latter_half_of_the_twentieth_century/6_Letters_and_vox_pops.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..2093fa29 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_05__Man's_crisis_of_identity_in_the_latter_half_of_the_twentieth_century/6_Letters_and_vox_pops.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,55 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Skit starts at anchor #6. + +00:10:20.000 --> 00:10:23.000 +[Viewer's letter in handwriting appears.] + +00:10:23.000 --> 00:10:33.000 + +Dear BBC, East Grinstead, Friday. I feel I really must write and protest about that sketch. My husband… is fifty. For how long are we to put up with these things. Yours sincerely, E. B. Debenham (Mrs). + +00:10:33.000 --> 00:10:36.000 +[Cut to another letter.] + +00:10:36.000 --> 00:10:55.000 + +Dear Freddy Grisewood, Bagshot, Surrey. As a prolific letter-writer, I feel I must protest about the previous letter. I am nearly sixty and am quite mad, but I do enjoy the BBC Home Service… Dunkirk… Profumo case… young hippies roaming the streets… Yours etc., Brigadier Arthur Gormanstrop (Mrs). + +00:10:55.000 --> 00:10:58.000 +[Cut to vox pops film.] + +00:10:58.000 --> 00:11:03.000 + +Well I think they should attack things, like that - with satire. I mean Ned Sherrin. Fair's fair. I think people should be able to make up their own minds for me. + +00:11:03.000 --> 00:11:12.000 + +Well I think they should attack the fuddy-duddy attitudes of the lower middle classes which permit the establishment to survive and keep the mores of the whole country back… + +00:11:12.000 --> 00:11:14.000 +[A boxer runs up and knocks her out.] + +00:11:14.000 --> 00:11:17.000 + +Well that's, er, very interesting, because, er, I am, in fact, made entirely of wood. + +00:11:17.000 --> 00:11:26.000 + +Well I think they should attack the lower classes, er, first with bombs… then mowing them down with machine guns… and then of course releasing the vultures… + +00:11:26.000 --> 00:11:28.000 +[A boy scout kneels beside a scoutmaster (off-frame).] + +00:11:28.000 --> 00:11:30.000 + +I think there should be more race prejudice. + +00:11:30.000 --> 00:11:31.000 + +[nudge] Less. + +00:11:31.000 --> 00:11:33.000 + +Less race prejudice. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_05__Man's_crisis_of_identity_in_the_latter_half_of_the_twentieth_century/7_Newsreader_arrested.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_05__Man's_crisis_of_identity_in_the_latter_half_of_the_twentieth_century/7_Newsreader_arrested.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..2190be0f --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_05__Man's_crisis_of_identity_in_the_latter_half_of_the_twentieth_century/7_Newsreader_arrested.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,48 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Skit starts at anchor #7. + +00:11:40.000 --> 00:11:44.000 +[News studio with a large screen behind the newsreader.] + +00:11:44.000 --> 00:11:51.000 + +… and several butchers aprons. In Fulham this morning a jeweller's shop was broken into… Police have issued this picture of a man they wish to interview. + +00:11:51.000 --> 00:11:55.000 +[On the screen appears an identical picture of him at his desk.] + +00:11:55.000 --> 00:12:02.000 + +The man is in his late twenties wearing a grey suit, a white shirt and a floral tie. + +00:12:02.000 --> 00:12:05.000 +[On the screen, police enter and remove the newsreader.] + +00:12:05.000 --> 00:12:12.000 + +Will anyone who sees this man or can give any information contact their nearest police station. Ah! Oh. We've just heard police have detained the man… + +00:12:12.000 --> 00:12:18.000 + +… but after questioning police have ruled him out and released him. + +00:12:18.000 --> 00:12:21.000 +[The other newsreader appears back on the screen and sits.] + +00:12:21.000 --> 00:12:24.000 + +Sport. + +00:12:24.000 --> 00:12:31.000 + +Ah, they say, however, that acting on his information they now wish to interview a newsreader in the central London area. Police are concentrating enquiries on the BBC… + +00:12:31.000 --> 00:12:34.000 + +[A policeman comes in and removes the foreground newsreader.] Excuse me a minute… + +00:12:34.000 --> 00:12:39.000 + +[Newsreader on the screen continues.] We understand a man is now helping police with their enquiries. And that is the end of the news. [clips jewellery to ear] And now, 'Match of the Day'. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_05__Man's_crisis_of_identity_in_the_latter_half_of_the_twentieth_century/8_Erotic_film.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_05__Man's_crisis_of_identity_in_the_latter_half_of_the_twentieth_century/8_Erotic_film.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..ffd84eab --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_05__Man's_crisis_of_identity_in_the_latter_half_of_the_twentieth_century/8_Erotic_film.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,55 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Skit starts at anchor #8. + +00:12:45.000 --> 00:12:50.000 +['Match of the Day' music. A couple at the foot of a bed, kissing.] + +00:12:50.000 --> 00:12:56.000 +[A car draws up; footsteps on gravel; door opens. The newsreader enters.] + +00:12:56.000 --> 00:13:05.000 + +Ah, I'm terribly sorry it's not in fact 'Match of the Day'— it is edited highlights of tonight's romantic movie. Sorry. + +00:13:05.000 --> 00:13:12.000 + +[He pops back in] Ooh, I'm sorry, on BBC2 Joan Bakewell will be talking to Michael Dean about what makes exciting television. + +00:13:12.000 --> 00:13:14.000 + +Ah, sorry about all that. And now back to the movie. + +00:13:14.000 --> 00:13:17.000 +[The couple continue to neck.] + +00:13:17.000 --> 00:13:19.500 + +Oh, oh, oh Bevis, should we? + +00:13:19.500 --> 00:13:21.500 + +Oh Dora. Why not? + +00:13:21.500 --> 00:13:23.500 + +Be gentle with me. + +00:13:23.500 --> 00:13:40.000 +[Film montage: chimney in reverse, poplars, waves, fish, fireworks, volcano, rocket, train into tunnel, dam bursts, battleship broadside, lion through flaming hoop, Nixon smiling, milking a cow, mid-air refuelling, WI applauding, caber toss, plane in flames, tree falls, shot tower collapses.] + +00:13:40.000 --> 00:13:44.000 + +[smoking] Oh Bevis, are you going to do anything or are you just going to show me films all evening? + +00:13:44.000 --> 00:13:46.000 + +Just one more, dear. + +00:13:46.000 --> 00:13:47.500 + +Oh. + +00:13:47.500 --> 00:13:55.000 +[He starts a projector. A two-minute Terry Gilliam extravaganza plays.] + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_05__Man's_crisis_of_identity_in_the_latter_half_of_the_twentieth_century/9_Silly_job_interview.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_05__Man's_crisis_of_identity_in_the_latter_half_of_the_twentieth_century/9_Silly_job_interview.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..da6faab5 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_05__Man's_crisis_of_identity_in_the_latter_half_of_the_twentieth_century/9_Silly_job_interview.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,229 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Skit starts at anchor #9. + +00:14:00.000 --> 00:14:03.000 +[Cut to an interview room.] + +00:14:03.000 --> 00:14:08.000 + +You know I really enjoy interviewing applicants for this management training course. [knock] Come in. Ah. Come and sit down. + +00:14:08.000 --> 00:14:09.500 + +Thank you. + +00:14:09.500 --> 00:14:14.000 + +[stares; writes] Would you mind just standing up again for one moment. Take a seat. + +00:14:14.000 --> 00:14:15.500 + +I'm sorry. + +00:14:15.500 --> 00:14:20.000 + +Take a seat. Ah! [writes] Good morning. + +00:14:20.000 --> 00:14:26.000 + +Good morning. — Good morning. — Good morning. + +00:14:26.000 --> 00:14:31.000 + +[writes] Tell me why did you say 'good morning' when you know perfectly well that it's afternoon? + +00:14:31.000 --> 00:14:34.000 + +Well, well, you said 'good morning'. Ha, ha. + +00:14:34.000 --> 00:14:35.500 + +[shakes head] Good afternoon. + +00:14:35.500 --> 00:14:37.000 + +Ah, good afternoon. + +00:14:37.000 --> 00:14:40.000 + +Oh dear. [writes] Good evening. + +00:14:40.000 --> 00:14:42.000 + +… Goodbye? + +00:14:42.000 --> 00:14:49.000 + +Ha, ha. No. [rings small hand-bell] … Aren't you going to ask me why I rang the bell? [rings bell again] + +00:14:49.000 --> 00:14:51.000 + +Er why did you ring the bell? + +00:14:51.000 --> 00:14:55.000 + +Why do you think I rang the bell? Five, four, three, two, one, zero! + +00:14:55.000 --> 00:14:56.500 + +Well, I, I… + +00:14:56.500 --> 00:15:00.000 + +Too late! [singing] Goodnight, ding-ding-ding-ding-ding. Goodnight… + +00:15:00.000 --> 00:15:03.000 + +Um. Oh this is the interview for the management training course is it? + +00:15:03.000 --> 00:15:06.000 + +[rings bell] Yes. Yes it is. Goodnight. Ding, ding, ding… + +00:15:06.000 --> 00:15:08.500 + +Oh. Oh dear, I don't think I'm doing very well. + +00:15:08.500 --> 00:15:10.500 + +Why do you say that? + +00:15:10.500 --> 00:15:12.000 + +Well I don't know. + +00:15:12.000 --> 00:15:14.500 + +Do you say it because you didn't know? + +00:15:14.500 --> 00:15:16.500 + +Well. I, I, I, I don't know. + +00:15:16.500 --> 00:15:20.000 +Five, four, three, two, one, zero! Right! [makes face and strange noise] + +00:15:20.000 --> 00:15:21.500 + +I'm sorry, I'm confused. + +00:15:21.500 --> 00:15:23.500 + +Well why do you think I did that then? + +00:15:23.500 --> 00:15:25.000 + +Well I don't know. + +00:15:25.000 --> 00:15:26.500 + +Aren't you curious? + +00:15:26.500 --> 00:15:28.000 + +Well yes. + +00:15:28.000 --> 00:15:30.000 + +Well, why didn't you ask me? + +00:15:30.000 --> 00:15:31.500 + +Well…I…er… + +00:15:31.500 --> 00:15:33.000 + +Name? + +00:15:33.000 --> 00:15:34.500 + +What? + +00:15:34.500 --> 00:15:36.000 + +Your name man, your name! + +00:15:36.000 --> 00:15:37.500 + +Um, er David. + +00:15:37.500 --> 00:15:39.000 + +David. Sure? + +00:15:39.000 --> 00:15:40.500 + +Oh yes. + +00:15:40.500 --> 00:15:42.000 +[writing] David Shaw. + +00:15:42.000 --> 00:15:43.500 + +No, no Thomas. + +00:15:43.500 --> 00:15:45.000 + +Thomas Shaw? + +00:15:45.000 --> 00:15:47.000 + +No, no, David Thomas. + +00:15:47.000 --> 00:15:50.000 +[long look; rings bell] Goodnight… + +00:15:50.000 --> 00:15:53.000 + +Oh dear we're back to that again. I don't know what to do when you do that. + +00:15:53.000 --> 00:15:58.000 +Well do something. Goodnight. Ding-ding… five, four, three, two, one… + +00:15:58.000 --> 00:16:00.000 +[Stig pulls face and makes noise] + +00:16:00.000 --> 00:16:04.000 + +Very good - do it again. … Very good indeed, quite outstanding. + +00:16:04.000 --> 00:16:09.000 +[Opens door] Ah right. Ready now. [four people enter and line up] + +00:16:09.000 --> 00:16:12.000 +[rings bell] Goodnight… + +00:16:12.000 --> 00:16:14.000 +[Stig cautiously pulls face and makes noise. Judges hold up points cards.] + +00:16:14.000 --> 00:16:16.000 + +What's going on? What's going on? + +00:16:16.000 --> 00:16:18.000 + +You've got very good marks. + +00:16:18.000 --> 00:16:26.000 + +[hysterical] I don't care, I want to know what's going on! … I'm going to tell the police… make bloody sure you never do it again. There, what do you think of that? + +00:16:26.000 --> 00:16:28.000 +[Judges give very high marks.] + +00:16:28.000 --> 00:16:29.500 + +Very good marks. + +00:16:29.500 --> 00:16:31.000 + +Oh, oh well, do I get the job? + +00:16:31.000 --> 00:16:35.000 + +Er, well, I'm afraid not. I'm afraid all the vacancies were filled several weeks ago. + +00:16:35.000 --> 00:16:38.000 +[They fall about laughing.] + diff --git "a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_06_\342\200\224_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/0_Episode6_head_tail.vtt" "b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_06_\342\200\224_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/0_Episode6_head_tail.vtt" new file mode 100644 index 00000000..d23106db --- /dev/null +++ "b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_06_\342\200\224_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/0_Episode6_head_tail.vtt" @@ -0,0 +1,59 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Intro, opening titles, running gags, and end credits + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:05.000 +[action] A telephone rings in the foreground; in the distant background the 'It's' man runs toward camera. + +00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:08.500 + +It's… + +00:00:08.500 --> 00:00:14.000 +[action] He covers the mouthpiece, addresses the camera, then returns to the receiver. + +00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:20.000 +[caption] Animated opening titles. + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:22.500 +[caption] NEXT WEEK + +00:00:22.500 --> 00:00:25.500 +[caption] HOW TO FLING AN OTTER + +00:00:25.500 --> 00:00:27.500 +[caption] THIS WEEK + +00:00:27.500 --> 00:00:33.000 +[caption] THE BBC ENTRY FOR THE ZINC STOAT OF BUDAPEST (CURRENT AFFAIRS) + +00:00:33.000 --> 00:00:36.000 +[caption] THESE CAPTIONS COST 12/6D. EACH + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:41.000 +[action] Cut to presenter in studio. + +00:00:41.000 --> 00:00:45.000 +[caption] ARTHUR FIGGIS + +00:00:45.000 --> 00:00:49.000 +[caption] THE SAME. A FEW SECONDS LATER + +00:00:49.000 --> 00:00:53.000 +[caption] THAT'S £4.7.6 SO FAR ON CAPTIONS ALONE + +00:00:53.000 --> 00:00:56.000 +[caption] NOT INCLUDING THAT ONE + +00:27:00.000 --> 00:27:06.000 +[action] End credits roll in the style of ‘Twentieth Century Vole’. + +00:27:06.000 --> 00:27:20.000 +[caption] PRODUCED BY — IRVING C. SALTZBERG JNR. | AN IRVING C. SALTZBERG PRODUCTIONS LTD. AND SALTZBERG ARTFILMS, OIL, REAL ESTATE, BANKING AND PROSTITUTION INC. CO-PRODUCTION + +00:27:20.000 --> 00:27:34.000 +[caption] FROM AN ORIGINAL IDEA BY — IRVING C. SALTZBERG JNR. | WRITTEN BY — IRVING C. SALTZBERG AND IRVING C. SALTZBERG | ADDITIONAL MATERIAL BY — IRVING C. SALTZBERG and the Pythons (Chapman, Cleese, Jones, Palin, Gilliam, Idle) stylized as credits. + +00:27:34.000 --> 00:27:42.000 +[caption] ALSO APPEARING — IAN C. DAVIDSONBERG | CREDITS BY — IRVING C. SALTZBERG + diff --git "a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_06_\342\200\224_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/10_Twentieth-century_vole.vtt" "b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_06_\342\200\224_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/10_Twentieth-century_vole.vtt" new file mode 100644 index 00000000..6b5ce4a3 --- /dev/null +++ "b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_06_\342\200\224_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/10_Twentieth-century_vole.vtt" @@ -0,0 +1,409 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit begins at anchor #10 + +00:21:00.000 --> 00:21:06.000 +[action] Animation leads to the 'Twentieth Century Vole' trademark; cut to producer's office; six writers wait. + +00:21:06.000 --> 00:21:07.500 + +Good morning boys. + +00:21:07.500 --> 00:21:09.500 + +Good morning Mr Saltzberg. + +00:21:09.500 --> 00:21:16.000 + +[sitting] Sit down! Sit down! Sit down! Sit down! Now, boys, I want you to know that I think you are the best six writers in movies today. I want you to know that I've had an idea for the next movie I'm going to produce and I want you boys to write it. + +00:21:16.000 --> 00:21:18.000 +[action] The writers run and kiss him. + +00:21:18.000 --> 00:21:20.000 + +Thank you. Thank you. + +00:21:20.000 --> 00:21:22.000 + +Oh sit down! Sit down! Sit down! There'll be plenty of time for that later on. Now boys, here's my idea… + +00:21:22.000 --> 00:21:23.500 + +It's great! + +00:21:23.500 --> 00:21:25.500 + +You like it huh? + +00:21:25.500 --> 00:21:29.000 + +Yeah, yeah, great! Really great. Fantastic. + +00:21:29.000 --> 00:21:31.000 + +[to first writer] Do you like it? + +00:21:31.000 --> 00:21:33.500 + +[thrown] Yeah! Er … yeah. + +00:21:33.500 --> 00:21:36.000 + +[still to first writer] What do you like best about it? + +00:21:36.000 --> 00:21:38.500 + +Oh well you haven't told us… what it is yet… + +00:21:38.500 --> 00:21:39.500 + +WHAT!? + +00:21:39.500 --> 00:21:41.500 + +I like what he likes. + +00:21:41.500 --> 00:21:43.000 + +What do you like? + +00:21:43.000 --> 00:21:44.500 + +I like what he likes. + +00:21:44.500 --> 00:21:46.000 + +I like what he likes. + +00:21:46.000 --> 00:21:48.000 + +I like what he likes + +00:21:48.000 --> 00:21:50.000 + +I just crazy about what he likes + +00:21:50.000 --> 00:21:51.500 + +What do you like? + +00:21:51.500 --> 00:21:53.500 + +I … I … I … agree with them. + +00:21:53.500 --> 00:21:56.000 + +Good! Now we're getting somewhere. Now, here's the start of the movie … I see snow! White snow! + +00:21:56.000 --> 00:21:57.500 + +Think of the colours! + +00:21:57.500 --> 00:21:59.500 + +And in the snow, I see … a tree! + +00:21:59.500 --> 00:22:02.000 + +Yes! Yes! + +00:22:02.000 --> 00:22:03.000 + +Wait, wait I haven't finished yet. + +00:22:03.000 --> 00:22:04.500 + +There's more? + +00:22:04.500 --> 00:22:07.000 + +And by this tree, gentlemen, I see … a dog! + +00:22:07.000 --> 00:22:08.000 + +Olé! + +00:22:08.000 --> 00:22:10.500 + +And gentlemen, this dog goes up to the tree, and he piddles on it. + +00:22:10.500 --> 00:22:11.500 + +Hallelujah! + +00:22:11.500 --> 00:22:12.500 + +Have we got a movie! + +00:22:12.500 --> 00:22:13.500 + +He tells it the way it is! + +00:22:13.500 --> 00:22:14.500 + +It's where it's at! + +00:22:14.500 --> 00:22:15.500 + +This is something else! + +00:22:15.500 --> 00:22:16.500 + +It's out of sight! + +00:22:16.500 --> 00:22:18.000 + +[finding Larry staring] I like it, I like it. + +00:22:18.000 --> 00:22:19.000 + +Oh yeah? + +00:22:19.000 --> 00:22:21.000 + +Yeah, yeah, I promise I like it + +00:22:21.000 --> 00:22:26.000 + +Sir, I don't know how to say this but I got to be perfectly frank. I really and truly believe this story of yours is the greatest story in motion-picture history. + +00:22:26.000 --> 00:22:27.500 + +Get out! + +00:22:27.500 --> 00:22:29.000 + +What? + +00:22:29.000 --> 00:22:34.000 + +If there's one thing I can't stand, it's a yes-man! Get out! I'll see you never work again. What do you think? + +00:22:34.000 --> 00:22:35.500 + +Well… I… + +00:22:35.500 --> 00:22:38.000 + +Just because I have an idea it doesn't mean it's great. It could be lousy. + +00:22:38.000 --> 00:22:39.000 + +It could? + +00:22:39.000 --> 00:22:40.500 + +Yeah! What d'ya think? + +00:22:40.500 --> 00:22:41.500 + +It's lousy. + +00:22:41.500 --> 00:22:47.000 + +There you are, you see, he spoke his mind. He said my idea was lousy. It just so happens my idea isn't lousy so get out you goddam pinko subversive, get out! + +00:22:47.000 --> 00:22:49.500 + +Well … I think it's an excellent idea. + +00:22:49.500 --> 00:22:51.000 + +Are you a yes-man? + +00:22:51.000 --> 00:22:54.000 + +No, no, no, I mean there may be things against it. + +00:22:54.000 --> 00:22:55.500 + +You think it's lousy, huh? + +00:22:55.500 --> 00:22:57.500 + +No, no, I mean it takes time. + +00:22:57.500 --> 00:22:59.500 + +[really threatening] Are you being indecisive? + +00:22:59.500 --> 00:23:02.000 + +Yo. Nes. Perhaps. + +00:23:02.000 --> 00:23:05.000 +[action] Fourth writer runs out; the remaining three try to hide under table. + +00:23:05.000 --> 00:23:07.500 + +I hope you three gentlemen aren't going to be indecisive! What the hell are you doing under that table? + +00:23:07.500 --> 00:23:09.000 + +We dropped our pencils. + +00:23:09.000 --> 00:23:10.500 + +Pencil droppers, eh? + +00:23:10.500 --> 00:23:12.000 + +No, no, no, no, no! + +00:23:12.000 --> 00:23:15.000 + +Right. Now I want your opinion of my idea … You… + +00:23:15.000 --> 00:23:16.500 + +Oh… + +00:23:16.500 --> 00:23:18.500 +[action] First writer faints. + +00:23:18.500 --> 00:23:20.000 + +Has he had a heart attack? + +00:23:20.000 --> 00:23:21.500 + +Er… + +00:23:21.500 --> 00:23:24.000 + +If there's one thing I can't stand, it's people who have heart attacks. + +00:23:24.000 --> 00:23:25.500 + +[recovering] I feel fine now. + +00:23:25.500 --> 00:23:27.000 + +Well, what do you think? + +00:23:27.000 --> 00:23:30.000 + +Oh! Eh! You didn't ask me you asked him. He didn't ask me, he asked him. No, him. + +00:23:30.000 --> 00:23:33.000 + +I've changed my mind. I'm asking you, the one in the middle. + +00:23:33.000 --> 00:23:34.500 + +The one in the middle? + +00:23:34.500 --> 00:23:41.000 + +Yes, the one in the middle. [phone rings] Hello, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, Dimitri … What the hell are you doing? + +00:23:41.000 --> 00:23:42.500 + +I'm thinking. + +00:23:42.500 --> 00:23:48.000 + +Get back in those seats immediately. Yes… Right you. The one in the middle, what do you think? + +00:23:48.000 --> 00:23:49.500 + +[panic] Er… er… + +00:23:49.500 --> 00:23:50.500 + +Come on! + +00:23:50.500 --> 00:23:51.500 + +Splunge. + +00:23:51.500 --> 00:23:53.000 + +Did he say splunge? + +00:23:53.000 --> 00:23:54.000 + +Yes. + +00:23:54.000 --> 00:23:56.000 + +What does splunge mean? + +00:23:56.000 --> 00:23:58.500 + +It means … it's a great-idea-but-possibly-not-and-I'm-not-being-indecisive! + +00:23:58.500 --> 00:24:00.000 + +Good. Right … What do you think? + +00:24:00.000 --> 00:24:01.500 + +Er. Splunge? + +00:24:01.500 --> 00:24:02.500 + +OK… + +00:24:02.500 --> 00:24:04.000 + +Yeah. Splunge for me too. + +00:24:04.000 --> 00:24:05.500 + +So all three of you think splunge, huh? + +00:24:05.500 --> 00:24:06.500 + +Yes! + +00:24:06.500 --> 00:24:16.000 + +Well now we're getting somewhere. No, wait. A new angle! In the snow, instead of the tree, I see Rock Hudson, and instead of the dog I see Doris Day and, gentlemen, Doris Day goes up to Rock Hudson and she kisses him. A love story. Intercourse Italian style. David Hemmings as a hippy Gestapo officer. Frontal nudity. A family picture. A comedy. And then when Doris Day's kissed Rock Hudson she says something funny like… + +00:24:16.000 --> 00:24:17.500 + +Er … Good evening. + +00:24:17.500 --> 00:24:21.000 + +Doris Day's a comedienne, not a newsreader. Get out! + +00:24:21.000 --> 00:24:22.500 + +She says something funny like + +00:24:22.500 --> 00:24:23.500 + +Splunge? + +00:24:23.500 --> 00:24:26.000 + +That's the stupidest idea I ever heard. Get out! + +00:24:26.000 --> 00:24:30.000 + +Doris Dog kisses Rock Tree and she says + +00:24:30.000 --> 00:24:33.000 + +Er… er… er… I can't take it anymore. + +00:24:33.000 --> 00:24:45.000 + +I like that! I like that, I can't take it any more, and then Rock Hudson says 'I'm a very rich film producer and I need a lobotomy' and then Doris Dog says 'I think you're very handsome and I'm going to take all my clothes off' and then Doris Dog turns into a yak and goes to the bathroom on David Lemming. No, wait, wait! + +00:24:45.000 --> 00:24:58.000 + +[on phone; voice over continues over 'It's' man film] Hello, hello, hello, who are you? You're an out-of-work writer? Well, you're fired. Roll the credits. Produced by Irving C. Saltzberg Jnr. of Irving C. Saltzberg Productions Ltd. and Saltzberg Art Films, Oil, Real Estate, Banking and Prostitution Inc. + +00:24:58.000 --> 00:25:20.000 +[caption] PRODUCED BY IRVING C. SALTZBERG JNR. | AN IRVING C. SALTZBERG PRODUCTIONS LTD. AND SALTZBERG ARTFILMS, OIL, REAL ESTATE, BANKING AND PROSTITUTION INC. CO-PRODUCTION + +00:25:20.000 --> 00:25:40.000 +[caption] FROM AN ORIGINAL IDEA BY IRVING C. SALTZBERG JNR. | WRITTEN BY IRVING C. SALTZBERG AND IRVING C. SALTZBERG | ADDITIONAL MATERIAL BY IRVING C. SALTZBERG and GRAHAM C. CHAPMANBERG, JOHN C. CLEESEBERG, TERRY C. JONESBERG, MICHAEL C. PALINBERG, TERRY C. GILLIAMBERG, ERIC C. IDLEBERG + +00:25:40.000 --> 00:25:50.000 +[caption] ALSO APPEARING WAS IAN C. DAVIDSONBERG | CREDITS BY IRVING C. SALTZBERG + diff --git "a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_06_\342\200\224_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/1_It's_the_arts.vtt" "b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_06_\342\200\224_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/1_It's_the_arts.vtt" new file mode 100644 index 00000000..eec4e267 --- /dev/null +++ "b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_06_\342\200\224_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/1_It's_the_arts.vtt" @@ -0,0 +1,10 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit begins at anchor #1 + +00:01:00.000 --> 00:01:05.000 +[action] Presenter signs autograph. Part of his signature animates away into the title. + +00:01:05.000 --> 00:01:10.000 +[caption] It's the Arts + diff --git "a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_06_\342\200\224_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/2_Johann_Gambolputty\342\200\246.vtt" "b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_06_\342\200\224_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/2_Johann_Gambolputty\342\200\246.vtt" new file mode 100644 index 00000000..408d99e8 --- /dev/null +++ "b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_06_\342\200\224_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/2_Johann_Gambolputty\342\200\246.vtt" @@ -0,0 +1,105 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit begins at anchor #2 + +00:02:00.000 --> 00:02:30.000 + +Beethoven, Mozart, Chopin, Liszt, Brahms, Panties… I'm sorry… Schumann, Schubert, Mendelssohn and Bach. Names that will live for ever. But there is one composer whose name is never included with the greats. Why is it that the world never remembered the name of Johann Gambolputty de von Ausfern- schplenden- schlitter- crasscrenbon- fried- digger- dingle- dangle- dongle- dungle- burstein- von- knacker- thrasher- apple- banger- horowitz- ticolensic- grander- knotty- spelltinkle- grandlich- grumblemeyer- spelterwasser- kurstlich- himbleeisen- bahnwagen- gutenabend- bitte- ein- nürnburger- bratwustle- gerspurten- mitz- weimache- luber- hundsfut- gumberaber- schöndanker- kalbsfleisch- mittler- aucher von Hautkopft of Ulm? To do justice to this man, thought by many to be the greatest name in German Baroque music, we present a profile of Johann Gambolputty de von Ausfern- … We start with an interview with his only surviving relative Karl Gambolputty de von Ausfern… + +00:02:30.000 --> 00:02:35.000 +[action] Cut to old man in wheelchair; intercut with interviewer. + +00:02:35.000 --> 00:02:52.000 + +Oh ja. When I first met Johann Gambolputty de von Ausfern- … von Hautkopft of Ulm, he was with his wife, Sarah Gambolputty de von… + +00:02:52.000 --> 00:03:20.000 + +Yes, if I may just cut in on you there, Herr Gambolputty de von Ausfern- … von Hautkopft of Ulm, and ask you - just quickly - if there's any particular thing that you remember about Johann Gambolputty de von Ausfern- … von Hautkopft of Ulm? + +00:03:20.000 --> 00:03:30.000 +[action] No response; he checks Karl, realizes he has died, digs a grave. Cut back to presenter. + +00:03:30.000 --> 00:03:33.000 + +A tribute to Johann Gambolputty… + +00:03:33.000 --> 00:03:35.500 + +…de von Ausfern- schplenden- schlitter… + +00:03:35.500 --> 00:03:38.500 + +…crasscrenbon- fried- digger- dingle- dangle- dongle- + +00:03:38.500 --> 00:03:41.500 + +…dungle- burstein- von- knacker- thrasher… + +00:03:41.500 --> 00:03:43.500 +[action] A succession of animated characters continue the name. + +00:03:43.500 --> 00:03:45.000 + +…apple- banger- horowitz- ticolensic… + +00:03:45.000 --> 00:03:46.500 + +…grander- knotty- spelltinkle… + +00:03:46.500 --> 00:03:47.500 + +…grandlich… + +00:03:47.500 --> 00:03:48.500 + +…grumblemeyer… + +00:03:48.500 --> 00:03:49.500 + +…spelterwasser… + +00:03:49.500 --> 00:03:50.500 + +…kurstlich- himbleeisen… + +00:03:50.500 --> 00:03:52.000 + +…bahnwagen- gutenabend… + +00:03:52.000 --> 00:03:53.500 + +…bitte- ein- nürnburger… + +00:03:53.500 --> 00:03:54.500 + +…bratwustle… + +00:03:54.500 --> 00:03:55.500 + +…gerspurten… + +00:03:55.500 --> 00:03:57.000 + +…mitz- weimache- luber- hundsfut… + +00:03:57.000 --> 00:03:58.500 + +…gumberaber- schöndanker… + +00:03:58.500 --> 00:03:59.500 + +…kalbsfleisch… + +00:03:59.500 --> 00:04:00.500 + +…mittler- aucher… + +00:04:00.500 --> 00:04:01.500 + +…von Hautkopft… + +00:04:01.500 --> 00:04:03.000 + +…of Ulm. + diff --git "a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_06_\342\200\224_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/3_Non-illegal_robbery.vtt" "b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_06_\342\200\224_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/3_Non-illegal_robbery.vtt" new file mode 100644 index 00000000..61531165 --- /dev/null +++ "b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_06_\342\200\224_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/3_Non-illegal_robbery.vtt" @@ -0,0 +1,162 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit begins at anchor #3 + +00:05:00.000 --> 00:05:06.000 +[action] Animation leads into a garret room; five desperate-looking robbers around a table. + +00:05:06.000 --> 00:05:07.500 + +All clear? + +00:05:07.500 --> 00:05:09.000 + +All clear, boss. + +00:05:09.000 --> 00:05:34.000 + +[carefully] Right … this is the plan then. At 10:45 .. you, Reg, collect me and Ken in the van, and take us round to the British Jewellery Centre in the High Street. We will arrive outside the British Jewellery Centre at 10:50 a of m. I shall then get out of the car, you Reg, take it and park it back here in Denver Street, right? At 10:51, I shall enter the British Jewellery Centre, where you, Vic, disguised as a customer, will meet me and hand me £5.18.3d. At 10:52, I shall approach the counter and purchase a watch costing £5.18.3d. I shall then give the watch to you, Vic. You'll go straight to Norman's Garage in East Street. You lads continue back up here at 10:56 and we rendezvous in the back room at the Cow and Sickle, at 11:15. All right, any questions? + +00:05:34.000 --> 00:05:37.000 + +We don't seem to be doing anything illegal. + +00:05:37.000 --> 00:05:38.500 + +What do you mean? + +00:05:38.500 --> 00:05:41.000 + +Well … we're paying for the watch. + +00:05:41.000 --> 00:05:42.500 + +Yes… + +00:05:42.500 --> 00:05:46.000 + +Well… why are we paying for the watch? + +00:05:46.000 --> 00:05:50.000 + +[heavily] They wouldn't give it to us if we didn't pay for it, would they… eh? + +00:05:50.000 --> 00:05:52.500 + +Look! I don't like this outfit. + +00:05:52.500 --> 00:05:54.000 + +Why not? + +00:05:54.000 --> 00:05:58.000 + +[freeing his mind] Well, we never break the bloody law. + +00:05:58.000 --> 00:06:00.000 +[action] General consternation. + +00:06:00.000 --> 00:06:02.000 + +What d'you mean? + +00:06:02.000 --> 00:06:04.000 + +Well, look at that bank job last week. + +00:06:04.000 --> 00:06:05.500 + +What was wrong with that? + +00:06:05.500 --> 00:06:10.000 + +Well having to go in there with a mask on and ask for £15 out of my deposit account; that's what was wrong with it. + +00:06:10.000 --> 00:06:12.000 + +Listen! What are you trying to say, Larry? + +00:06:12.000 --> 00:06:14.000 + +Couldn't we just steal the watch, Boss + +00:06:14.000 --> 00:06:21.000 + +Oh, you dumb cluck! We spent weeks organizing this job. Reg rented a room across the road and filmed the people going in and out every day. Vic spent three weeks looking at watch catalogues… until he knew the price of each one backwards, and now I'm not going to risk the whole raid just for the sake of breaking the law. + +00:06:21.000 --> 00:06:23.500 + +Urr… couldn't we park on a double yellow line? + +00:06:23.500 --> 00:06:24.500 + +No! + +00:06:24.500 --> 00:06:26.500 + +Couldn't we get a dog to foul the foot… + +00:06:26.500 --> 00:06:27.500 + +No! + +00:06:27.500 --> 00:06:29.000 + +'Ere, Boss! + +00:06:29.000 --> 00:06:30.500 + +What's the matter with you? + +00:06:30.500 --> 00:06:33.000 + +I just thought… I left the car on a meter… and it's… + +00:06:33.000 --> 00:06:34.000 + +Overdue? + +00:06:34.000 --> 00:06:35.500 + +Yes, Boss. + +00:06:35.500 --> 00:06:37.000 + +How much? + +00:06:37.000 --> 00:06:40.000 + +[quaking] I dunno, Boss… maybe two … maybe five minutes … + +00:06:40.000 --> 00:06:50.000 + +Five minutes overdue. You fool! You fool! All right … we've no time to lose. Ken - shave all your hair off, get your passport and meet me at this address in Rio de Janeiro Tuesday night. Vic - go to East Africa, have plastic surgery and meet me there. Reg - go to Canada and work your way south to Nicaragua by July. Larry - you stay here as front man. Give us fifteen minutes then blow the building up. All right, make it fast. + +00:06:50.000 --> 00:06:52.000 + +I can't blow the building up. + +00:06:52.000 --> 00:06:53.500 + +Why not? + +00:06:53.500 --> 00:06:55.000 + +It's illegal. + +00:06:55.000 --> 00:06:58.000 + +Oh bloody hell. Well we'd better give ourselves up then. + +00:06:58.000 --> 00:06:59.500 + +We can't, Boss. + +00:06:59.500 --> 00:07:01.000 + +Why not? + +00:07:01.000 --> 00:07:03.000 + +We haven't done anything illegal. + diff --git "a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_06_\342\200\224_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/4_Vox_pops.vtt" "b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_06_\342\200\224_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/4_Vox_pops.vtt" new file mode 100644 index 00000000..fe901967 --- /dev/null +++ "b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_06_\342\200\224_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/4_Vox_pops.vtt" @@ -0,0 +1,71 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit begins at anchor #4 + +00:08:00.000 --> 00:08:05.000 +[action] Exterior of bank. Three bandits rush out with swag; one stops to talk to camera. + +00:08:05.000 --> 00:08:08.000 + +No I think being illegal makes it more exciting. + +00:08:08.000 --> 00:08:12.000 + +Yes, I agree. I mean, if you're going to go straight you might as well be a vicar or something. + +00:08:12.000 --> 00:08:15.000 +[action] Cut to vicar; he wheels round, hand in restoration-fund box. + +00:08:15.000 --> 00:08:16.500 + +What? + +00:08:16.500 --> 00:08:19.500 +[action] Cut to chartered accountant. + +00:08:19.500 --> 00:08:24.000 + +I agree. If there were fewer robbers there wouldn't be so many of them, numerically speaking. + +00:08:24.000 --> 00:08:26.000 +[action] Cut to pepperpot. + +00:08:26.000 --> 00:08:28.000 + +I think sexual ecstasy is over-rated. + +00:08:28.000 --> 00:08:30.000 +[action] Cut to Scotsman. + +00:08:30.000 --> 00:08:33.000 + +Well, how very interesting, because I'm now made entirely of tin. + +00:08:33.000 --> 00:08:35.000 +[action] Cut to Police Inspector Praline. + +00:08:35.000 --> 00:08:38.000 + +After a few more of these remarks, I shall be appearing in a sketch, so stay tuned. + +00:08:38.000 --> 00:08:40.000 +[action] Cut to policeman. + +00:08:40.000 --> 00:08:43.000 + +It's the uniform that puts them off, that and my bad breath. + +00:08:43.000 --> 00:08:45.000 +[action] Cut to judge and QC in wigs and robes. + +00:08:45.000 --> 00:08:48.000 + +[matter of factly] We like dressing up, yes… + +00:08:48.000 --> 00:08:50.000 +[action] Cut to Inspector Praline. + +00:08:50.000 --> 00:08:54.000 + +Hello again. I am at present still on film, but in a few seconds I shall be appearing in the studio. Thank you. + diff --git "a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_06_\342\200\224_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/5_Crunchy_frog.vtt" "b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_06_\342\200\224_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/5_Crunchy_frog.vtt" new file mode 100644 index 00000000..969e16e7 --- /dev/null +++ "b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_06_\342\200\224_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/5_Crunchy_frog.vtt" @@ -0,0 +1,184 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit begins at anchor #5 + +00:10:00.000 --> 00:10:04.000 +[action] Studio. A door opens. Inspector Praline looks round the door and enters with Superintendent Parrot. + +00:10:04.000 --> 00:10:10.000 + +[to camera] Hello. Mr Milton? You are sole proprietor and owner of the Whizzo Chocolate Company? + +00:10:10.000 --> 00:10:11.500 + +I am. + +00:10:11.500 --> 00:10:17.500 + +Superintendent Parrot and I are from the hygiene squad. We want to have a word with you about your box of chocolates entitled the Whizzo Quality Assortment. + +00:10:17.500 --> 00:10:19.000 + +Ah, yes. + +00:10:19.000 --> 00:10:26.000 + +[producing box] If I may begin at the beginning. First there is the Cherry Fondue. This is extremely nasty, but we can't prosecute you for that. + +00:10:26.000 --> 00:10:27.500 + +Agreed. + +00:10:27.500 --> 00:10:30.000 + +Next we have number four, 'Crunchy Frog'. + +00:10:30.000 --> 00:10:31.500 + +Ah, yes. + +00:10:31.500 --> 00:10:34.000 + +Am I right in thinking there's a real frog in here? + +00:10:34.000 --> 00:10:35.500 + +Yes. A little one. + +00:10:35.500 --> 00:10:37.000 + +What sort of frog? + +00:10:37.000 --> 00:10:38.000 + +A dead frog. + +00:10:38.000 --> 00:10:39.500 + +Is it cooked? + +00:10:39.500 --> 00:10:40.500 + +No. + +00:10:40.500 --> 00:10:42.500 + +What, a raw frog? + +00:10:42.500 --> 00:10:45.500 +[action] Superintendent Parrot looks increasingly queasy. + +00:10:45.500 --> 00:10:53.000 + +We use only the finest baby frogs, dew-picked and flown from Iraq, cleansed in the finest quality spring water, lightly killed, and then sealed in a succulent Swiss quintuple smooth treble cream milk chocolate envelope, and lovingly frosted with glucose. + +00:10:53.000 --> 00:10:55.000 + +That's as may be, but it's still a frog! + +00:10:55.000 --> 00:10:56.500 + +What else? + +00:10:56.500 --> 00:10:59.500 + +Well don't you even take the bones out? + +00:10:59.500 --> 00:11:01.500 + +If we took the bones out it wouldn't be crunchy would it? + +00:11:01.500 --> 00:11:03.500 + +Superintendent Parrot ate one of those. + +00:11:03.500 --> 00:11:06.000 + +Excuse me a moment. + +00:11:06.000 --> 00:11:08.000 +[action] Superintendent exits hurriedly. + +00:11:08.000 --> 00:11:14.000 + +Well, the Superintendent thought it was an almond whirl. People won't expect there to be a frog in there. They're bound to think it's some sort of mock frog. + +00:11:14.000 --> 00:11:18.000 + +[insulted] Mock frog? We use no artificial preservatives or additives of any kind! + +00:11:18.000 --> 00:11:24.000 + +Nevertheless, I must warn you that in future you should delete the words 'crunchy frog', and replace them with the legend, 'crunchy raw unboned real dead frog' if you want to avoid prosecution. + +00:11:24.000 --> 00:11:25.500 + +What about our sales? + +00:11:25.500 --> 00:11:29.500 + +I'm not interested in your sales! I have to protect the general public! Now what about this one. It was number five, wasn't it? Number five Ram's Bladder Cup. What sort of confection is this? + +00:11:29.500 --> 00:11:35.000 + +We use choicest juicy chunks of fresh Cornish ram's bladder, emptied, steamed, flavoured with sesame seeds, whipped into a fondue and garnished with lark's vomit. + +00:11:35.000 --> 00:11:36.500 + +Larks vomit? + +00:11:36.500 --> 00:11:37.500 + +Correct. + +00:11:37.500 --> 00:11:40.000 + +Well it don't say nothing about that here. + +00:11:40.000 --> 00:11:42.000 + +Oh yes it does, on the bottom of the box, after monosodium glutamate. + +00:11:42.000 --> 00:11:46.000 + +[looking] Well I hardly think this is good enough. I think it'd be more appropriate if the box bore a great red label warning lark's vomit. + +00:11:46.000 --> 00:11:47.500 + +Our sales would plummet! + +00:11:47.500 --> 00:11:56.000 + +Well why don't you move into more conventional areas of confectionary, like praline or lime cream; a very popular flavor, I'm led to understand. I mean look at this one 'cockroach cluster', anthrax ripple! What's this one: 'spring surprise'? + +00:11:56.000 --> 00:12:02.000 + +Ah - now, that's our speciality - covered with darkest creamy chocolate. When you pop it into your mouth steel bolts spring out and plunge straight through both cheeks. + +00:12:02.000 --> 00:12:09.000 + +Well where's the pleasure in that? If people place a nice chocky in their mouth, they don't want their cheeks pierced. In any case this is an inadequate description of the sweetmeat. I shall have to ask you to accompany me to the station. + +00:12:09.000 --> 00:12:12.000 + +[getting up, being led away] It's a fair cop. + +00:12:12.000 --> 00:12:13.500 + +Stop talking to the camera. + +00:12:13.500 --> 00:12:14.500 + +I'm sorry. + +00:12:14.500 --> 00:12:20.000 +[action] Superintendent Parrot enters and addresses the camera. + +00:12:20.000 --> 00:12:30.000 + +If only the general public would take more care when buying its sweeties, it would reduce the number of man-hours lost to the nation and they would spend less time having their stomachs pumped and sitting around in public lavatories. + +00:12:30.000 --> 00:12:36.000 + +The BBC would like to apologize for the extremely poor quality of the next announcement, only he's not at all well. + diff --git "a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_06_\342\200\224_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/6_The_dull_life_of_a_City_stockbroker.vtt" "b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_06_\342\200\224_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/6_The_dull_life_of_a_City_stockbroker.vtt" new file mode 100644 index 00000000..0ed6f2dc --- /dev/null +++ "b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_06_\342\200\224_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/6_The_dull_life_of_a_City_stockbroker.vtt" @@ -0,0 +1,33 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit begins at anchor #6 + +00:13:00.000 --> 00:13:03.000 + +We present 'The Dull Life of a City Stockbroker', + +00:13:03.000 --> 00:13:35.000 +[action] A suburban morning: stockbroker finishes breakfast; wife strips off as two men in briefs emerge from cupboard. Outside, neighbor greets him; an assegai kills the neighbor unnoticed. He moves on. + +00:13:35.000 --> 00:14:05.000 +[action] Newsagent: naked clerk serves him; he doesn't react. Bus queue: Frankenstein kills each person down the line; bus arrives, stockbroker boards calmly. + +00:14:05.000 --> 00:14:35.000 +[action] On the bus with soldiers; grenade lands beside him, soldiers flee; he disembarks into pitched battle, hails driverless taxi, rides off. + +00:14:35.000 --> 00:15:05.000 +[action] Office: secretary dead at typewriter, legs hang from ceiling, couple snog at his desk. He sits, furtively takes 'Thrills and Adventure' comic and reads. + +00:15:05.000 --> 00:15:25.000 +[caption] Comic panels: 'My God, his nose just exploded with enough force to destroy his kleenex' … 'If only I had a kleenex to lend him… but these trousers…!! No back pocket!' + +00:15:25.000 --> 00:15:40.000 +[action] Superman flies between frames, breaks through, frames collapse on him. + +00:15:40.000 --> 00:15:48.000 +[caption] Safety curtain appears. + +00:15:48.000 --> 00:15:52.000 + +Coming right up - the theatre sketch - so don't move! + diff --git "a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_06_\342\200\224_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/7_Red_Indian_in_theatre.vtt" "b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_06_\342\200\224_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/7_Red_Indian_in_theatre.vtt" new file mode 100644 index 00000000..ec042a55 --- /dev/null +++ "b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_06_\342\200\224_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/7_Red_Indian_in_theatre.vtt" @@ -0,0 +1,112 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit begins at anchor #7 + +00:16:30.000 --> 00:16:42.000 +[action] First night audience settles. A Sioux Indian in war paint and loin cloth takes an empty seat; neighbor grows uneasy. + +00:16:42.000 --> 00:16:46.000 + +[with big gestures] Me heap want see play. Me want play start heap soon. + +00:16:46.000 --> 00:16:49.000 + +Yes well. I think it … begins in a minute. + +00:16:49.000 --> 00:16:52.000 + +Me heap big fan Cicely Courtneidge. + +00:16:52.000 --> 00:16:55.000 + +[highly embarrassed] Yes … she's very good. + +00:16:55.000 --> 00:17:02.000 + +She fine actress … she make interpretation heap subtle … she heap good diction and timing … she make part really live for Indian brave. + +00:17:02.000 --> 00:17:05.000 + +Yes … yes … she's marvelous… + +00:17:05.000 --> 00:17:11.000 + +My father - Chief Running Stag - leader of mighty Redfoot tribe - him heap keen on Michael Denison and Dulcie Gray. + +00:17:11.000 --> 00:17:14.000 + +[drawn in] Do you go to the theatre a lot? + +00:17:14.000 --> 00:17:22.000 + +When moon high over prairie … when wolf howl over mountain, when mighty wind roar through Yellow Valley, we go Leatherhead Rep - block booking, upper circle - whole tribe get it on 3/6d each. + +00:17:22.000 --> 00:17:24.000 + +That's very good. + +00:17:24.000 --> 00:17:31.000 + +Stage Manager, Stan Wilson, heap good friend Redfoot tribe. After show we go pow-wow speakum with director, Sandy Camp, in snug bar of Bell and Compasses. Him mighty fine director. Him heap famous. + +00:17:31.000 --> 00:17:33.000 + +Oh - I don't know him myself. + +00:17:33.000 --> 00:17:36.000 + +Him say Leatherhead Rep like do play with Redfoot tribe. + +00:17:36.000 --> 00:17:37.500 + +Oh that's good… + +00:17:37.500 --> 00:17:45.000 + +We do 'Dial M for Murder'. Chief Running Elk - him kill buffalo with bare hands, run thousand paces when the sun is high - him play Chief Inspector Hardy - heap good fine actor. + +00:17:45.000 --> 00:17:47.500 + +You do a lot of acting do you? + +00:17:47.500 --> 00:17:49.500 + +Yes. Redfoot tribe live by acting and hunting. + +00:17:49.500 --> 00:17:51.500 + +You don't fight any more? + +00:17:51.500 --> 00:18:00.000 + +Yes! Redfoot make war! When Chief Yellow Snake was leader, and Mighty Eagle was in land of forefather, we fight Pawnee at Oxbow Crossing. When Pawnee steal our rehearsal copies of 'Reluctant Debutante' we kill fifty Pawnee - houses heap full every night. Heap good publicity. + +00:18:00.000 --> 00:18:04.000 +[action] Lights dim; chatter subsides; overture starts. + +00:18:04.000 --> 00:18:07.000 + +[relieved] I think he's about to start now, thank God for that. + +00:18:07.000 --> 00:18:11.000 + +[leaning across] Paleface like eat chocolate? + +00:18:11.000 --> 00:18:12.500 + +No, thank you very much. + +00:18:12.500 --> 00:18:15.000 + +[helping himself] Hmmm - crunchy frog - heap good. + +00:18:15.000 --> 00:18:19.000 +[action] House Manager steps before tabs, very nice young man. + +00:18:19.000 --> 00:18:24.000 + +Ladies and gentlemen. Before the play starts, I would like to apologize to you all, but unfortunately Miss Cicely Courtneidge is unable to appear, owing to… + +00:18:24.000 --> 00:18:30.000 +[action] He is struck by arrows; collapses revealing more in his back. War-whoops, drums, screams fill the air. + diff --git "a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_06_\342\200\224_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/8_Policemen_make_wonderful_friends.vtt" "b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_06_\342\200\224_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/8_Policemen_make_wonderful_friends.vtt" new file mode 100644 index 00000000..cf1044d8 --- /dev/null +++ "b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_06_\342\200\224_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/8_Policemen_make_wonderful_friends.vtt" @@ -0,0 +1,42 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit begins at anchor #8 + +00:19:00.000 --> 00:19:04.000 +[action] Working-class kitchen. Mum reads a newspaper. + +00:19:04.000 --> 00:19:06.500 + +D'you read that, Edgar? + +00:19:06.500 --> 00:19:08.500 + +What's that dear? + +00:19:08.500 --> 00:19:11.500 + +There's been another Indian massacre at Dorking Civic Theatre. + +00:19:11.500 --> 00:19:13.500 + +About time too dear… + +00:19:13.500 --> 00:19:16.000 + +'Those who were left alive at the end got their money back'. + +00:19:16.000 --> 00:19:18.000 + +That's what live theatre needs - a few more massacres… + +00:19:18.000 --> 00:19:22.000 + +'The police are anxious to speak to anyone who saw the crime, ladies with large breasts, or just anyone who likes policemen.' + +00:19:22.000 --> 00:19:26.000 +[action] A policeman walks in between couple and camera. + +00:19:26.000 --> 00:19:40.000 + +[to camera] Yes! Policemen make wonderful friends. So if you are over six feet tall and would like a friend, a pen friend, in the police force, here is the address to write to: 'Mrs Ena Frog, 8 Masonic Apron Street, Cowdenbeath'. Remember - policemen make wonderful friends. So write today and take advantage of our free officer. Thank you. And now for the next sketch. + diff --git "a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_06_\342\200\224_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/9_A_Scotsman_on_a_horse.vtt" "b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_06_\342\200\224_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/9_A_Scotsman_on_a_horse.vtt" new file mode 100644 index 00000000..1e9ae12b --- /dev/null +++ "b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_06_\342\200\224_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/9_A_Scotsman_on_a_horse.vtt" @@ -0,0 +1,21 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit begins at anchor #9 + +00:20:00.000 --> 00:20:03.000 +[action] Policeman removes helmet, shakes out a slip; Mum reads. + +00:20:03.000 --> 00:20:05.000 + +A Scotsman on a horse. + +00:20:05.000 --> 00:20:08.000 + +For Mrs Emma Hamilton of Nelson, a Scotsman on a horse. + +00:20:08.000 --> 00:20:14.000 +[action] A Scotsman rides up, looks puzzled, rides off. + +00:20:14.000 --> 00:20:40.000 +[action] At a wee kirk, another Scotsman waits to wed. Intercut: the first gallops; wedding procession advances. Ceremony completes; first Scotsman bursts in, hoists groom, carries him off. Cut to WI audience applauding. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_07__You're_no_fun_any_more/0_Episode7_head_tail.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_07__You're_no_fun_any_more/0_Episode7_head_tail.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..f0127db7 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_07__You're_no_fun_any_more/0_Episode7_head_tail.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,39 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Intro cold open with It's Man and assorted interstitials; closing credits. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:07.000 +[action] A long hilly scar of land; trees on either side. Heavy breathing as the 'It's' Man runs down toward camera and fails to say his line. + +00:00:07.000 --> 00:00:10.000 + +(prompting) It's…no…no…it's…it's…it's… + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:14.000 + +(finally) It's… + +00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:22.000 +[action] By the miracle of money we swing into a fantastically expensive opening animation sequence, produced by one of America's very own drop-outs. + +00:06:30.000 --> 00:06:34.000 +[action] ANIMATION: A girl in bed. Count Dracula enters; she reveals her neck. His fangs fall out. + +00:06:34.000 --> 00:06:37.000 + +Oh, you're no fun anymore. + +00:06:37.000 --> 00:06:43.000 +[action] A man at the yardarm being lashed. + +00:06:43.000 --> 00:06:47.000 + +.. thirty-nine… forty. All right, cut him down, Mr Fuller. + +00:06:47.000 --> 00:06:50.000 + +Oh you're no fun anymore. + +00:28:30.000 --> 00:28:40.000 +[caption] ROLLER CAPTION: 'YOU'RE NO FUN ANYMORE'…(CREDITS) + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_07__You're_no_fun_any_more/1_Camel_spotting.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_07__You're_no_fun_any_more/1_Camel_spotting.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..f07075e8 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_07__You're_no_fun_any_more/1_Camel_spotting.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,115 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Field interview with a 'camel spotter' who is actually a train spotter; ends with knight hitting interviewer. + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:28.000 +[action] In the country. Interviewer with microphone; behind him a man sits on a wall with clipboard, binoculars and spotting gear. + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:33.000 + +Good evening. Tonight we're going to take a hard tough abrasive look at camel spotting. Hello. + +00:00:33.000 --> 00:00:35.500 + +Hello Peter. + +00:00:35.500 --> 00:00:39.500 + +Now tell me, what exactly are you doing? + +00:00:39.500 --> 00:00:47.000 + +Er well, I'm camel spotting. I'm spotting to see if there are any camels that I can spot, and put them down in my camel spotting book. + +00:00:47.000 --> 00:00:51.000 + +Good. And how many camels have you spotted so far? + +00:00:51.000 --> 00:00:56.000 + +Oh, well so far Peter, up to the present moment, I've spotted nearly, ooh, nearly one. + +00:00:56.000 --> 00:00:58.000 + +Nearly one? + +00:00:58.000 --> 00:01:00.000 + +Er, call it none. + +00:01:00.000 --> 00:01:04.000 + +Fine. And er how long have you been here? + +00:01:04.000 --> 00:01:06.000 + +Three years. + +00:01:06.000 --> 00:01:11.000 + +So, in, er, three years you've spotted no camels? + +00:01:11.000 --> 00:01:20.000 + +Yes in only three years. Er, I tell a lie, four, be fair, five. I've been camel spotting for just the seven years. Before that of course I was a Yeti spotter. + +00:01:20.000 --> 00:01:24.000 + +A Yeti spotter, that must have been extremely interesting. + +00:01:24.000 --> 00:01:36.000 + +Oh, it was extremely interesting, very, very - quite… it was dull; dull, dull, dull, oh God it was dull. Sitting in the Waterloo waiting room. Course once you've seen one Yeti you've seen them all. + +00:01:36.000 --> 00:01:38.000 + +And have you seen them all? + +00:01:38.000 --> 00:01:44.000 + +Well I've seen one. Well a little one… a picture of a… I've heard about them. + +00:01:44.000 --> 00:01:48.000 + +Well, now tell me, what do you do when you spot a camel? + +00:01:48.000 --> 00:01:50.000 + +Er, I take its number. + +00:01:50.000 --> 00:01:53.000 + +Camels don't have numbers. + +00:01:53.000 --> 00:01:58.000 + +Ah, well you've got to know where to look. Er, they're on the side of the engine above the piston box. + +00:01:58.000 --> 00:01:59.500 + +What? + +00:01:59.500 --> 00:02:04.500 + +Ah - of course you've got to make sure it's not a dromedary. 'Cos if it's a dromedary it goes in the dromedary book. + +00:02:04.500 --> 00:02:07.000 + +Well how do you tell if it's a dromedary? + +00:02:07.000 --> 00:02:12.000 + +Ah well, a dromedary has one hump and a camel has a refreshment car, buffet, and ticket collector. + +00:02:12.000 --> 00:02:15.000 + +Mr Sopwith, aren't you in fact a train spotter? + +00:02:15.000 --> 00:02:16.500 + +What? + +00:02:16.500 --> 00:02:19.500 + +Don't you in fact spot trains? + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_07__You're_no_fun_any_more/2_You're_no_fun_any_more.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_07__You're_no_fun_any_more/2_You're_no_fun_any_more.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..ac6c0fba --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_07__You're_no_fun_any_more/2_You're_no_fun_any_more.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,40 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Running gag sequence of 'You're no fun anymore' lines and return to the spotter. + +00:02:19.500 --> 00:02:22.500 + +Oh, you're no fun anymore. + +00:02:22.500 --> 00:02:27.500 +[action] ANIMATION: Girl in bed with Dracula whose fangs fall out. + +00:02:27.500 --> 00:02:29.500 + +Oh, you're no fun anymore. + +00:02:29.500 --> 00:02:33.500 +[action] A man at the yardarm being lashed. + +00:02:33.500 --> 00:02:36.000 + +.. thirty-nine… forty. All right, cut him down, Mr Fuller. + +00:02:36.000 --> 00:02:38.500 + +Oh you're no fun anymore. + +00:02:38.500 --> 00:02:43.000 +[action] Back to camel spotter. + +00:02:43.000 --> 00:02:47.000 + +Now if anybody else pinches my phrase I'll throw them under a camel. + +00:02:47.000 --> 00:02:50.000 + +(giggling) If you can spot one. + +00:02:50.000 --> 00:02:56.000 +[action] Spotter glares. Knight in armour appears and hits interviewer with a chicken. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_07__You're_no_fun_any_more/3_The_audit.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_07__You're_no_fun_any_more/3_The_audit.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..79a350eb --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_07__You're_no_fun_any_more/3_The_audit.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,183 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Boardroom audit gag culminating with 'you're no fun anymore' and strange announcements. + +00:02:56.000 --> 00:02:59.000 +[action] Cut to a small board meeting. An accountant stands up and reads. + +00:02:59.000 --> 00:03:20.000 + +Lady Chairman, sir, shareholders, ladies and gentlemen. I have great pleasure in announcing that owing to a cutback on surplus expenditure of twelve million Canadian dollars, plus a refund of seven and a half million Deutschmarks from the Swiss branch, and in addition adding the debenture preference stock of the three and three quarter million to the directors' reserve currency account of seven and a half million, plus an upward expenditure margin of eleven and a half thousand lira, due to a rise in capital investment of ten million pounds, this firm last year made a complete profit of a shilling. + +00:03:20.000 --> 00:03:22.500 + +A shilling Wilkins? + +00:03:22.500 --> 00:03:24.000 + +Er, roughly, yes sir. + +00:03:24.000 --> 00:03:30.000 + +Wilkins, I am the Chairman of a multi-million pound corporation and you are a very new chartered Accountant. Isn't it possible there may have been some mistake? + +00:03:30.000 --> 00:03:34.000 + +Well that's very kind of you sir, but I don't think I'm ready to be Chairman yet. + +00:03:34.000 --> 00:03:37.000 + +Wilkins, Wilkins. This shilling, is it net or gross? + +00:03:37.000 --> 00:03:38.500 + +It's British sir. + +00:03:38.500 --> 00:03:41.500 + +Yes, has tax been paid on it? + +00:03:41.500 --> 00:03:47.000 + +Yes, this is after tax. Owing to the rigorous bite of the income tax five pence of a further sixpence was swallowed up in tax. + +00:03:47.000 --> 00:03:49.000 + +Five pence of a further sixpence? + +00:03:49.000 --> 00:03:50.500 + +(eagerly) Yes sir. + +00:03:50.500 --> 00:03:53.000 + +Five pence of a further sixpence? + +00:03:53.000 --> 00:03:54.500 + +That's right sir. + +00:03:54.500 --> 00:03:57.500 + +Then where is the other penny? + +00:03:57.500 --> 00:03:59.000 + +… Er. + +00:03:59.000 --> 00:04:02.000 + +That makes you a penny short Wilkins. Where is it? + +00:04:02.000 --> 00:04:03.500 + +… Erm. + +00:04:03.500 --> 00:04:04.500 + +Wilkins? + +00:04:04.500 --> 00:04:07.500 + +(in tears) I embezzled it sir. + +00:04:07.500 --> 00:04:09.000 + +What all of it? + +00:04:09.000 --> 00:04:10.500 + +Yes all of it. + +00:04:10.500 --> 00:04:12.000 + +You naughty person. + +00:04:12.000 --> 00:04:15.000 + +It's my first. Please be gentle with me. + +00:04:15.000 --> 00:04:17.000 + +I'm afraid it's my unpleasant duty to inform you that you're fired. + +00:04:17.000 --> 00:04:19.000 + +Oh please, please. + +00:04:19.000 --> 00:04:20.500 + +No, out! + +00:04:20.500 --> 00:04:22.500 + +(crying) Oh … (he leaves) + +00:04:22.500 --> 00:04:25.500 + +Yes, there's no place for sentiment in big business. + +00:04:25.500 --> 00:04:29.500 +[action] He turns a wall plaque 'There is no place for sentiment in Big Business'. On the back it reads: 'He's right you know'. + +00:04:29.500 --> 00:04:32.000 + +(to Chairman) Oh you're no fun anymore. + +00:04:32.000 --> 00:04:35.000 +[action] Camel Spotting man runs in, shouting. + +00:04:35.000 --> 00:04:37.000 + +I heard that. Who said that? + +00:04:37.000 --> 00:04:39.000 +[action] (all pointing at the bishop) He did! He did! + +00:04:39.000 --> 00:04:40.500 + +No I didn't. + +00:04:40.500 --> 00:04:42.000 + +Ooh! + +00:04:42.000 --> 00:04:43.500 + +Right! + +00:04:43.500 --> 00:04:48.000 +[action] Shot of the bishop bound and gagged and tied across a railway line. + +00:04:48.000 --> 00:04:51.000 + +Here is the address to complain to … + +00:04:51.000 --> 00:04:54.500 +[caption] MR ALBERT SPIM, I,OOO,OO8 LONDON ROAD, OXFORD + +00:04:54.500 --> 00:04:59.000 + +The Royal Frog Trampling Institute, 16 Rayners Lane, London, W.C. Fields. I'll just repeat that… + +00:04:59.000 --> 00:05:02.500 +[caption] FLIGHT LT. & PREBENDARY ETHEL MORRIS, THE DIMPLES, THAXTED, NR BUENOS AIRES + +00:05:02.500 --> 00:05:07.500 + +Tristram and Isolde Phillips, 7.30 Covent Garden Saturday (near Sunday) and afterwards at the Inigo Jones Fish Emporium. + +00:05:07.500 --> 00:05:10.000 +[action] Cut to Jewish figure. + +00:05:10.000 --> 00:05:12.000 + +And they want to put the licence fee up? + +00:05:12.000 --> 00:05:14.000 +[action] Cut to photo of a man with pipe. + +00:05:14.000 --> 00:05:17.000 + +And now here is a reminder about leaving your radio on during the night. Leave your radio on during the night. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_07__You're_no_fun_any_more/4_Science_fiction_sketch.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_07__You're_no_fun_any_more/4_Science_fiction_sketch.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..11ec0b32 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_07__You're_no_fun_any_more/4_Science_fiction_sketch.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,25 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Redcoat intro and epic sci‑fi voiceover leading to Brainsample and Harold Potter setup. + +00:05:17.000 --> 00:05:23.000 +[action] Cut to redcoat addressing audience. + +00:05:23.000 --> 00:05:33.000 + +A little joke, a little jest. Nothing to worry about ladies and gentlemen. Now we've got some science fiction for you, some sci-fi, something to send the shivers up your spine, send the creepy crawlies down your lager and limes. All the lads have contributed to it, it's a little number entitled, Science Fiction Sketch… + +00:05:33.000 --> 00:05:38.000 +[action] Zoom through the galaxy to the solar system. + +00:05:38.000 --> 00:05:58.000 + +(very resonant) The Universe consists of a billion, billion galaxies… 77,000,000,000 miles across, and every galaxy is made up of a billion, zillion stars and around these stars circle a billion planets, and of all of these planets the greenest and the pleasantest is the planet Earth, in the system of Sol, in the Galaxy known as the Milky Way … And it was to this world that creatures of an alien planet came … to conquer and destroy the very heart of civilization… + +00:05:58.000 --> 00:06:10.000 +[action] Mix to railway station sign 'New Pudsey'. Pull to Mr and Mrs Samuel Brainsample walking; camera pans off them to a bowler-hatted businessman. + +00:06:10.000 --> 00:06:33.000 + +(gently) It was a day like any other and Mr and Mrs Samuel Brainsample were a perfectly ordinary couple, leading perfectly ordinary lives - the sort of people to whom nothing extraordinary ever happened, and not the kind of people to be the centre of one of the most astounding incidents in the history of mankind … So let's forget about them and follow instead the destiny of this man … Harold Potter, gardener, and tax official, first victim of Creatures from another Planet. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_07__You're_no_fun_any_more/5_Man_turns_into_Scotsman.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_07__You're_no_fun_any_more/5_Man_turns_into_Scotsman.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..64a61941 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_07__You're_no_fun_any_more/5_Man_turns_into_Scotsman.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,274 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Alien ray turns people into Scotsmen; Inspector interviews; lab scene with Charles and She; mass Scottishness; segue to Podgorny. + +00:06:33.000 --> 00:06:48.000 +[action] Flying saucer over skyline; Potter walks suburban road; ray strikes; Potter freezes, shivers and turns into a Scotsman, spins off to bagpipes. + +00:06:48.000 --> 00:06:51.000 +[caption] Newspaper headline: 'Man turns into a Scotsman'. + +00:06:51.000 --> 00:06:54.000 + +Read all abaht it! Read all abaht it! Man turns into Scotsman! + +00:06:54.000 --> 00:07:00.000 +[action] At Potter's gate, an Inspector interviews Potter's wife. + +00:07:00.000 --> 00:07:03.000 + +Mrs Potter - you knew Harold Potter quite well I believe? + +00:07:03.000 --> 00:07:04.500 + +Oh yes quite well. + +00:07:04.500 --> 00:07:05.500 + +Yes. + +00:07:05.500 --> 00:07:07.000 + +He was my husband. + +00:07:07.000 --> 00:07:13.000 + +Yes. And, er, he never showed any inclination towards being a Scotsman before this happened? + +00:07:13.000 --> 00:07:18.000 + +(shocked) No, no, not at all. He was not that sort of person… + +00:07:18.000 --> 00:07:21.000 + +He didn't wear a kilt or play the bagpipes? + +00:07:21.000 --> 00:07:22.500 + +No, no. + +00:07:22.500 --> 00:07:26.000 + +He never got drunk at night or bought home black puddings? + +00:07:26.000 --> 00:07:28.000 + +No, no. Not at all. + +00:07:28.000 --> 00:07:31.000 + +He didn't have an inadequate brain capacity? + +00:07:31.000 --> 00:07:33.000 + +No, no, not at all. + +00:07:33.000 --> 00:07:39.000 + +I see. So by your account Harold Potter was a perfectly ordinary Englishman without any tendency towards being a Scotsman whatsoever? + +00:07:39.000 --> 00:07:45.000 + +Absolutely, yes. (suddenly remembering) Mind you he did always watch Dr Finlay on television. + +00:07:45.000 --> 00:07:48.000 + +Ah-hah! … Well that's it, you see. That's how it starts. + +00:07:48.000 --> 00:07:50.000 + +I beg your pardon? + +00:07:50.000 --> 00:07:58.000 + +Well you see Scottishness starts with little things like that, and works up. You see, people don't just turn into a Scotsman for no reason at all… (goes rigid; Scots accent) No further questions! + +00:07:58.000 --> 00:08:25.000 +[action] He turns into a Scotsman and spins away. Rapid montage: people in bus queue, policeman, pram, baby, jazz musician, soldiers—all turn into Scotsmen and race off. Flying saucer over skyline. Cut to passionate kiss close-up; foggy lens and romantic music. + +00:08:25.000 --> 00:08:26.500 + +Charles… + +00:08:26.500 --> 00:08:28.500 + +Darling… + +00:08:28.500 --> 00:08:29.500 + +Charles… + +00:08:29.500 --> 00:08:31.500 + +Darling, darling… + +00:08:31.500 --> 00:08:35.500 + +Charles… there's something I've got to tell you… + +00:08:35.500 --> 00:08:37.500 + +What is it darling? + +00:08:37.500 --> 00:08:40.500 + +It's daddy … he's turned into a Scotsman… + +00:08:40.500 --> 00:08:42.500 + +What! Mr Llewellyn? + +00:08:42.500 --> 00:08:45.000 + +Yes, Charles. Help me, please help me. + +00:08:45.000 --> 00:08:47.000 + +But what can I do? + +00:08:47.000 --> 00:08:53.000 + +Surely, Charles, you're the Chief Scientist at the Anthropological Research Institute, at Butley Down - an expert in what makes people change from one nationality to another. + +00:08:53.000 --> 00:08:57.000 + +So I am! (reveal laboratory; he in white coat, she absurdly sexy) This is right up my street! + +00:08:57.000 --> 00:08:58.500 + +Oh good. + +00:08:58.500 --> 00:09:01.500 + +Now first of all, why would anyone turn into a Scotsman? + +00:09:01.500 --> 00:09:03.500 + +(tentatively) Em, for business reasons? + +00:09:03.500 --> 00:09:08.000 + +No, no! Only because he has no control over his own destiny! Look I'll show you… + +00:09:08.000 --> 00:09:11.500 +[action] He presses a button; lab TV reads: 'only because they have no control over their own destinies'. + +00:09:11.500 --> 00:09:12.500 + +I see. + +00:09:12.500 --> 00:09:16.500 + +Yes! So this means that some person or persons unknown is turning all these people into Scotsmen… + +00:09:16.500 --> 00:09:19.000 + +Oh, what kind of heartless fiend could do that to a man? + +00:09:19.000 --> 00:09:25.000 + +I don't know … I don't know … all I know is that these people are streaming north of the border at the rate of thousands every hour. If we don't act fast, Scotland will be choked with Scotsmen… + +00:09:25.000 --> 00:09:26.000 + +Ooh!… + +00:09:26.000 --> 00:09:38.000 +[action] Zoom on her face; hordes of Scotsmen hurtling through woods to border sign 'Scotland Welcomes You'. + +00:09:38.000 --> 00:09:41.000 + +Soon Scotland was full of Scotsmen. The over-crowding was pitiful. + +00:09:41.000 --> 00:09:43.500 +[action] They stop abruptly, looking lost. + +00:09:43.500 --> 00:09:45.500 + +Three men to a caber. + +00:09:45.500 --> 00:10:05.000 +[action] Three Scots toss one caber; crowded bed; Gilliam animation: England empties, Scotland fills, till sound 'Empty' on England; deserted streets; shop signs 'Gone to Scotland', 'McClosed', 'McWoolworths & Co'. + +00:10:05.000 --> 00:10:08.000 + +For the few who remained, life was increasingly difficult. + +00:10:08.000 --> 00:10:32.000 +[action] Man runs to drive bus, fakes being driver and passenger; empty football stadium with lone spectator and single-player 'match'; saucer shot; back to lab: door flies open. + +00:10:32.000 --> 00:10:34.500 + +Charles! Thank goodness I've found you! It's mummy! + +00:10:34.500 --> 00:10:36.000 + +Hello mummy. + +00:10:36.000 --> 00:10:38.500 + +No, no, mummy's turned into a Scotsman… + +00:10:38.500 --> 00:10:41.000 + +Oh how horrible… Will they stop at nothing? + +00:10:41.000 --> 00:10:42.500 + +I don't know - do you think they will? + +00:10:42.500 --> 00:10:44.000 + +I meant that rhetorically. + +00:10:44.000 --> 00:10:45.500 + +What does rhetorically mean? + +00:10:45.500 --> 00:10:48.000 + +It means, I didn't expect an answer. + +00:10:48.000 --> 00:10:49.500 + +Oh I see. Oh, you're so clever, Charles. + +00:10:49.500 --> 00:10:52.000 + +Did mummy say anything as she changed? + +00:10:52.000 --> 00:10:55.500 + +(with an air of tremendous revelation) Yes! she did, now you come to mention it + +00:10:55.500 --> 00:10:58.000 +[action] Long pause. He waits expectantly. + +00:10:58.000 --> 00:11:00.000 + +Well, what was it? + +00:11:00.000 --> 00:11:05.000 + +Oh, she said … 'Them!' (thrilling chord, quick zoom) Is there someone at the door? + +00:11:05.000 --> 00:11:07.000 + +No … It's just the incidental music for this scene. + +00:11:07.000 --> 00:11:08.000 + +Oh I see… + +00:11:08.000 --> 00:11:09.500 + +'Them' … Wait a minute! + +00:11:09.500 --> 00:11:11.000 + +A whole minute? + +00:11:11.000 --> 00:11:18.000 + +No, I meant that metaphorically … 'Them' … 'Them' … She was obviously referring to the people who turned her into a Scotsman. If only we knew who 'They' were … And why 'They' were doing it… Who are 'Them'? + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_07__You're_no_fun_any_more/6_Police_station.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_07__You're_no_fun_any_more/6_Police_station.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..c1757fa3 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_07__You're_no_fun_any_more/6_Police_station.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,461 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Podgorny receives kilt order from Andromeda; tennis-girl reports a blancmange at the station; returns to Podgorny; police PSA; detective interview and blancmange attack; Charles deduces Wimbledon plot. + +00:11:18.000 --> 00:11:28.000 +[action] Smash cut to a Scottish crofter's cottage; zoom. VO explains Andromeda kilt order. + +00:11:28.000 --> 00:11:34.000 + +Then suddenly a clue turned up in Scotland. Mr Angus Podgorny, owner of a Dunbar menswear shop, received an order for 48,000,000 kilts from the planet Skyron in the Galaxy of Andromeda. + +00:11:34.000 --> 00:11:38.000 +[action] Interior: oil-lamp menswear shop. Elderly couple pore over a letter. + +00:11:38.000 --> 00:11:41.000 + +Angus how are y'going to get 48,000,000 kilts into the van? + +00:11:41.000 --> 00:11:43.000 + +I'll have t'do it in two goes. + +00:11:43.000 --> 00:11:47.000 + +D'you not ken that the Galaxy of Andromeda is two million, two hundred thousand light years away? + +00:11:47.000 --> 00:11:48.500 + +Is that so? + +00:11:48.500 --> 00:11:52.500 + +Aye … and you've never been further than Berwick-on-Tweed… + +00:11:52.500 --> 00:11:56.500 + +Aye … but think o' the money dear … £18.10.0d a kilt …that's … (uses abacus) £900,000,000 - and that's without sporrans! + +00:11:56.500 --> 00:11:58.500 + +Aye … I think you ought not to go, Angus. + +00:11:58.500 --> 00:12:04.500 + +(visionary) Aye … we'd be able to afford writing paper with our names on it… We'd be able to buy that extension to the toilet… + +00:12:04.500 --> 00:12:07.000 + +Aye … but he hasn't signed the order yet, has he? + +00:12:07.000 --> 00:12:08.500 + +Who? + +00:12:08.500 --> 00:12:11.000 + +Ach … the man from Andromeda. + +00:12:11.000 --> 00:12:14.000 + +Och … well … he wasna really a man, d'you ken … + +00:12:14.000 --> 00:12:16.000 +[action] Creepy music edges in. + +00:12:16.000 --> 00:12:18.500 + +(narrowing eyes) Not really a man? + +00:12:18.500 --> 00:12:24.500 + +(sweating as music rises) He was as strange a thing as ever I saw, or ever I hope to see, God willing. He was a strange unearthly creature - a quivering, glistening mass… + +00:12:24.500 --> 00:12:26.500 + +Angus Podgorny, what do y'mean? + +00:12:26.500 --> 00:12:28.500 + +He wasna so much a man as… a blancmange! + +00:12:28.500 --> 00:12:30.000 +[action] Jarring chord. + +00:12:30.000 --> 00:12:34.000 +[action] Police station counter; a tennis girl reports. + +00:12:34.000 --> 00:12:35.500 + +A blancmange, eh? + +00:12:35.500 --> 00:12:41.000 + +Yes, that's right. I was just having a game of doubles with Sandra and Jocasta, Alec and David… + +00:12:41.000 --> 00:12:42.500 + +Hang on! + +00:12:42.500 --> 00:12:43.500 + +What? + +00:12:43.500 --> 00:12:45.500 + +There's five. + +00:12:45.500 --> 00:12:47.000 + +What? + +00:12:47.000 --> 00:12:51.000 + +Five people . . . how do you play doubles with five people? + +00:12:51.000 --> 00:12:53.000 + +Ah, well … we were… + +00:12:53.000 --> 00:12:57.000 + +Sounds a bit funny if you ask me … playing doubles with five people… + +00:12:57.000 --> 00:13:02.000 + +Well we often play like that… Jocasta plays on the side receiving service… + +00:13:02.000 --> 00:13:03.500 + +Oh yes? + +00:13:03.500 --> 00:13:07.000 + +Yes. It helps to speed the game up and make it a lot faster, and it means Jocasta isn't left out. + +00:13:07.000 --> 00:13:13.000 + +Look, are you asking me to believe that the five of you was playing doubles, when on the very next court there was a blancmange playing by itself?. + +00:13:13.000 --> 00:13:15.000 + +That's right, yes. + +00:13:15.000 --> 00:13:21.000 + +Well answer me this then - why didn't Jocasta play the blancmange at singles, while you and Sandra and Alec and David had a proper game of doubles with four people? + +00:13:21.000 --> 00:13:24.000 + +Because Jocasta always plays with us. She's a friend of ours. + +00:13:24.000 --> 00:13:27.000 + +Call that friendship? Messing up a perfectly good game of doubles? + +00:13:27.000 --> 00:13:30.000 + +It's not messing it up, officer, we like to play with five. + +00:13:30.000 --> 00:13:40.000 + +Look it's your affair if you want to play with five people … but don't go calling it doubles. Look at Wimbledon, right? If Fred Stolle and Tony Roche played Charlie Pasarell and Cliff Drysdale and Peaches Bartcowitz… they wouldn't go calling it doubles. + +00:13:40.000 --> 00:13:42.000 + +But what about the blancmange? + +00:13:42.000 --> 00:13:45.000 + +That could play Ann Haydon-Jones and her husband Pip. + +00:13:45.000 --> 00:13:49.000 +[action] Back to Podgorny's shop; they resume as if nothing happened. + +00:13:49.000 --> 00:13:52.000 + +Oh, a blancmange gave you an order for 48,000,000 kilts? + +00:13:52.000 --> 00:13:53.500 + +Aye! + +00:13:53.500 --> 00:13:55.500 + +And you believed it? + +00:13:55.500 --> 00:13:58.000 + +Aye, I did. + +00:13:58.000 --> 00:14:01.000 + +Och, you're a stupid man, Angus Podgorny. + +00:14:01.000 --> 00:14:07.000 + +(angry) Oh look woman, how many kilts did we sell last year? Nine and a half, that's all. So when I get an order for 48,000,000, I believe it - you bet I believe it. + +00:14:07.000 --> 00:14:09.500 + +Even if it's from a blancmange? + +00:14:09.500 --> 00:14:17.000 + +Och, woman, if a blancmange is prepared to come 2,200,000 light years to purchase a kilt, they must be fairly keen on kilts. So cease yer prattling woman and get sewing. This could be the biggest breakthrough in kilts since the Provost of Edinburgh sat on a spike. Mary, we'll be rich! We'll be rich! + +00:14:17.000 --> 00:14:20.000 + +Oh, but Angus… he hasna given you an earnest of his good faith! + +00:14:20.000 --> 00:14:24.000 + +Ah mebbe not but he has gi' me this… + +00:14:24.000 --> 00:14:26.000 + +What is it now? + +00:14:26.000 --> 00:14:30.000 + +An entry form for the British Open Tennis Championships at Wimbledon Toon … signed and seconded. + +00:14:30.000 --> 00:14:34.500 + +Och, but Angus, ye ken full well that Scots folk dinna know how to play the tennis to save their lives. + +00:14:34.500 --> 00:14:36.500 + +Aye, but I must go though dear, I dinna want to seem ungrateful. + +00:14:36.500 --> 00:14:38.500 + +Ach! Angus, I wilna let you make a fool o'yourself. + +00:14:38.500 --> 00:14:40.000 + +But I must. + +00:14:40.000 --> 00:14:42.000 + +Och, no you'll not … + +00:14:42.000 --> 00:14:46.000 +[action] Close-up on Angus; a strange creaking, slurping noise. + +00:14:46.000 --> 00:14:49.000 + +Oh, Mary… Oh, oh, Mary! Look out! Look out! + +00:14:49.000 --> 00:14:51.000 +[action] Big close-up of Mary's eyes bulging. + +00:14:51.000 --> 00:14:53.000 + +Urrgh. It's the blancmange. + +00:14:53.000 --> 00:15:00.000 +[action] Blur focus. Cut to police spokesman at a desk with a book; addresses camera with PSA. + +00:15:00.000 --> 00:15:28.000 + +Oh, now this is where Mr Podgorny could have saved his wife's life. If he'd gone to the police and told them that he'd been approached by unearthly beings from the Galaxy of Andromeda, we'd have sent a man round to investigate. As it was he did a deal with a blancmange, and the blancmange ate his wife. So if you're going out, or going on holiday, or anything strange happens involving other galaxies, just nip round to your local police station, and tell the sergeant on duty - or his wife - of your suspicions. And the same goes for dogs. So I'm sorry to have interrupted your exciting science fiction story … but, then, crime's our business you know. So carry on viewing, and my thanks to the BBC for allowing me to have this little chat with you. Goodnight. God bless, look after yourselves. + +00:15:28.000 --> 00:15:30.000 +[action] Knight in armour hits policeman with raw chicken. + +00:15:30.000 --> 00:15:34.000 +[action] CID office; Detective interviews sobbing Podgorny. + +00:15:34.000 --> 00:15:42.000 + +(softly, understandingly) Do sit down, Mr Podgorny… I… I … think what's happened is … terribly … terribly… funny …. tragic. But you must understand that we have to catch the creature that ate your wife, and if you could help us answer a few questions, we may be able to help save a few lives. I know this is the way your wife would have wanted it. + +00:15:42.000 --> 00:15:45.000 +[action] He sits on the desk; Angus steadies himself. + +00:15:45.000 --> 00:15:48.000 + +Aye … I'll … do … my best, sergeant. + +00:15:48.000 --> 00:15:50.000 + +(slaps) Detective Inspector! + +00:15:50.000 --> 00:15:51.500 + +Er, detective inspector. + +00:15:51.500 --> 00:15:58.000 + +(sharp, fast) Now then. The facts are these. You received an order for 48,000,000 kilts from a blancmange from the planet Skyron in the Galaxy of Andromeda … you'd just shown your wife an entry form for Wimbledon, which you'd filled in… when you turned round and saw her legs disappearing into a blancmange. Is that correct? + +00:15:58.000 --> 00:15:59.500 + +Yes, sir. + +00:15:59.500 --> 00:16:01.000 + +Are you mad? + +00:16:01.000 --> 00:16:02.500 + +No, sir. + +00:16:02.500 --> 00:16:06.000 + +Well that's a relief. 'Cos if you were, your story would be less plausible. Now then, do you recognize this? + +00:16:06.000 --> 00:16:08.500 + +(squeak of fear) Oh yes. That's the one that ate my Mary! + +00:16:08.500 --> 00:16:12.000 + +Good. His name's Riley… Jack Riley… He's that most rare of criminals … a blancmange impersonator and cannibal. + +00:16:12.000 --> 00:16:14.500 + +But what about the 48,000,000 kilts and the Galaxy of Andromeda? + +00:16:14.500 --> 00:16:18.000 + +I'm afraid that's just one of his stories. You must understand that a blancmange impersonator and cannibal has to use some pretty clever stories to allay suspicion. + +00:16:18.000 --> 00:16:28.000 +[action] Staccato exchange of 'Yes/No/How/Why/Who knows/Could be/I know/She was/Yes' culminating in a strange noise outside the door. + +00:16:28.000 --> 00:16:35.000 + +Good lord what's that? (opens door; eyes widen) Ah, Riley! Come to give yourself up have you, Riley? (sudden fear) Eh Riley? Riley! Riley! It's not Riley! + +00:16:35.000 --> 00:16:38.000 +[action] Eating noises; he is dragged out of shot. Angus averts his eyes. + +00:16:38.000 --> 00:16:40.000 + +(off) It's an extra-terrestial being! Agggh! + +00:16:40.000 --> 00:16:44.000 +[action] Jarring chord; back to laboratory. She sits suggestively; Charles paces. + +00:16:44.000 --> 00:16:47.000 + +So, everyone in England is being turned into Scotsmen, right? + +00:16:47.000 --> 00:16:48.000 + +Yes. + +00:16:48.000 --> 00:16:50.000 + +Now, which is the worst tennis-playing nation in the world? + +00:16:50.000 --> 00:16:51.500 + +Er … Australia. + +00:16:51.500 --> 00:16:53.000 + +No. Try again. + +00:16:53.000 --> 00:16:54.500 + +Australia? + +00:16:54.500 --> 00:16:57.000 + +(testily) No… try again but say a different place. + +00:16:57.000 --> 00:16:59.000 + +Oh, I thought you meant I'd said it badly. + +00:16:59.000 --> 00:17:01.500 + +No, course you didn't say it badly. Now hurry. + +00:17:01.500 --> 00:17:03.500 + +Er, Czechoslovakia. + +00:17:03.500 --> 00:17:05.000 + +No! Scotland! + +00:17:05.000 --> 00:17:06.500 + +Of course. + +00:17:06.500 --> 00:17:10.500 + +Now … now these blancmanges, apart from the one that killed Mrs Podgorny have all appeared in which London suburb? + +00:17:10.500 --> 00:17:12.000 + +Finchley? + +00:17:12.000 --> 00:17:16.000 + +No. Wimbledon … Now do you begin to see the pattern? With what sport is Wimbledon commonly associated? + +00:17:16.000 --> 00:17:18.000 +[action] She thinks really hard. + +00:17:18.000 --> 00:17:22.000 + +(off) For viewers at home, the answer is coming up on your screens. Those of you who wish to play it the hard way, stand upside down with your head in a bucket of piranha fish. Here is the question once again. + +00:17:22.000 --> 00:17:24.000 + +With what sport is Wimbledon commonly associated? + +00:17:24.000 --> 00:17:25.500 +[caption] TENNIS + +00:17:25.500 --> 00:17:26.500 + +Cricket. + +00:17:26.500 --> 00:17:27.500 + +No. + +00:17:27.500 --> 00:17:28.500 + +Pelote? + +00:17:28.500 --> 00:17:31.000 + +No. Wimbledon is most commonly associated with tennis. + +00:17:31.000 --> 00:17:32.500 + +Of course! Now I see! + +00:17:32.500 --> 00:17:34.500 + +Yes, it all falls into place! + +00:17:34.500 --> 00:17:39.000 + +The blancmangcs are really Australians trying to get the rights of the pelota rules from the Czech publishers! + +00:17:39.000 --> 00:17:42.000 + +(heavily) No … not quite … but, er, just look in here. + +00:17:42.000 --> 00:17:46.000 +[action] She bends to microscope; Charles knocks her out with a sand-filled sock, continues musing. + +00:17:46.000 --> 00:17:58.000 + +Yes. So these blancmanges, blancmange-shaped creatures come from the planet Skyron in the Galaxy of Andromeda. They order 48,000,000 kilts from a Scottish menswear shop … turn the population of England into Scotsmen (well known as the worst tennis-playing nation on Earth) thus leaving England empty during Wimbledon fortnight! Empty during Wimbledon fortnight … what's more the papers are full of reports of blancmanges appearing on tennis courts up and down the country - practising. This can only mean one thing! + +00:17:58.000 --> 00:18:00.000 +[caption] THEY MEAN TO WIN WIMBLEDON + +00:18:00.000 --> 00:18:02.500 + +They mean to win Wimbledon! + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_07__You're_no_fun_any_more/7_Blancmanges_playing_tennis.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_07__You're_no_fun_any_more/7_Blancmanges_playing_tennis.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..7eaa0d0f --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_07__You're_no_fun_any_more/7_Blancmanges_playing_tennis.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,90 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Wimbledon final: blancmange vs. Podgorny; Brainsamples eat the blancmange; epilogue VO. + +00:18:02.500 --> 00:18:05.000 +[action] Cut to commentator in his box at Wimbledon. + +00:18:05.000 --> 00:18:33.000 + +Well, here at Wimbledon, it's been a most extraordinary week's tennis. The blancmanges have swept the board, winning match after match. Here are just a few of the results: Billie-Jean King eaten in straight sets, Laver smothered whole after winning the first set, and Poncho Gonzales, serving as well as I've never seen him, with some superb volleys and decisive return volleys off the back hand, was sucked through the net at match point and swallowed whole in just under two minutes. And so, here on the final day, there seems to be no players left to challenge the blancmanges. And this could be their undoing, Dan: as the rules of Wimbledon state quite clearly that there must be at least one human being concerned in the final. Well the blancmange is coming out onto the pitch now, and there is a human with it. It's Angus Podgorny! The plucky little Scottish tailor … upon whom everything depends. And so it's Podgorny versus blancmange in this first ever Intergalactic Wimbledon! + +00:18:33.000 --> 00:18:40.000 +[action] Centre Court (or No.1). Blancmange serves a sizzling ace; Podgorny quivers and misses. + +00:18:40.000 --> 00:18:42.500 + +And it's blancmange to serve and it's a good one. + +00:18:42.500 --> 00:18:44.000 + +Blurb blurble blurb. + +00:18:44.000 --> 00:18:45.500 + +Fifteen love. + +00:18:45.500 --> 00:18:55.000 +[action] Rapid collage: blancmange serving; Podgorny missing; scoreboard climbs. + +00:18:55.000 --> 00:18:58.000 +[caption] SCOREBOARD: BLANCMANGE 40 — PODGORNY 0 + +00:18:58.000 --> 00:19:06.000 + +And Podgorny fails to even hit the ball … but this is no surprise as he hasn't hit the ball once throughout this match. So it's 72 match points to the blancmange now… Podgorny prepares to serve again. + +00:19:06.000 --> 00:19:09.000 +[caption] SCOREBOARD: BLANCMANGE 6 6 5 40 — PODGORNY 0 0 + +00:19:09.000 --> 00:19:12.000 + +This is indeed a grim day for the human race, Dan. + +00:19:12.000 --> 00:19:17.000 +[action] Mr and Mrs Brainsample jump onto the court with forks and spoons, napkins tucked in. + +00:19:17.000 --> 00:19:20.000 + +But what's this? Two spectators have rushed onto the pitch with spoons and forks… what are they going to do? + +00:19:20.000 --> 00:19:22.000 +[action] Cut to laboratory. + +00:19:22.000 --> 00:19:24.000 + +They mean to eat the blancmange. + +00:19:24.000 --> 00:19:27.000 +[action] The girl rises woozily; he knocks her out again with sand sock. + +00:19:27.000 --> 00:19:32.000 + +And they're eating the blancmange … Yes! The blancmange is leaving the court… it's abandoning the game! This is fantastic! + +00:19:32.000 --> 00:19:36.000 +[action] Mr and Mrs Brainsample covered in blancmange, licking fingers. + +00:19:36.000 --> 00:19:40.000 + +Yes it was Mr and Mrs Samuel Brainsample, who, after only a brief and misleading appearance in the early part of the film, returned to save the Earth … but why? + +00:19:40.000 --> 00:19:43.000 + +Oh, well you see we love blancmanges. My wife makes them. + +00:19:43.000 --> 00:19:45.500 + +She makes blancmanages that size? + +00:19:45.500 --> 00:19:51.000 + +Oh, yes. You see we're from the planet Skyron in the Galaxy of Andromeda, and they're all that size there. We tried to tell you at the beginning of the film but you just panned off us. + +00:19:51.000 --> 00:19:56.000 +[action] Back to Podgorny on court; finally makes contact and runs to receive his own serves. + +00:19:56.000 --> 00:20:00.000 + +So the world was saved! And Angus Podgorny became the first Scotsman to win Wimbledon… fifteen years later. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_08__Full_frontal_nudity/0_Episode8_head_tail.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_08__Full_frontal_nudity/0_Episode8_head_tail.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..648d93e9 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_08__Full_frontal_nudity/0_Episode8_head_tail.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,66 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Intro vox pops, titles, linking colonel interjections, and end credits + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:05.000 +[action] 'It's' man lounges in countryside; bikini-clad woman serves wine and caresses him. + +00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:07.500 + +It's… + +00:00:07.500 --> 00:00:10.000 +[caption] 'MONTY PYTHON'S FLYING CIRCUS' + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:13.000 +[action] Cartoon credits roll. + +00:00:13.000 --> 00:00:15.500 +[caption] 'EPISODE 12B: FULL FRONTAL NUDITY' + +00:00:15.500 --> 00:00:18.500 +[action] Cut to vox pops. + +00:00:18.500 --> 00:00:22.500 + +Speaking as a public opinion poll, I've had enough of the permissive society. + +00:00:22.500 --> 00:00:25.000 + +I havn't had enough of the permissive society. + +00:00:25.000 --> 00:00:28.000 +[caption] IN THIS PERFORMANCE THE PART OF DAVID HEMMINGS WILL BE PLAYED BY A PIECE OF WOOD + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:31.000 +[action] Cut to policeman. + +00:00:31.000 --> 00:00:34.500 + +I would not appear in a frontal nude scene unless it was valid. + +00:06:30.000 --> 00:06:45.000 +[action] Colonel addresses audience about silliness and cues an outdoor sketch. + +00:24:30.000 --> 00:24:35.000 +[caption] 'A LITTLE LATER LTD' + +00:28:30.000 --> 00:28:35.000 +[caption] 'A SIMILAR PET SHOP IN BOLTON; LANCS' + +00:28:35.000 --> 00:28:40.000 +[action] Announcer eating yoghurt; colonel nudges him. + +00:37:30.000 --> 00:37:35.000 +[caption] 'BUT THERE LET US LEAVE THE ART CRITIC TO STRANGLE HIS WIFE AND MOVE ON TO PASTURES NEW' + +00:49:00.000 --> 00:49:05.000 +[action] End credits roller: 'FULL FRONTAL NUDITY' WAS CONCIEVED, WRITTEN AND PERFORMED BY… + +00:49:05.000 --> 00:49:10.000 + +David Hemmings appeared by permission of the National Forestry Commission. + +00:49:10.000 --> 00:49:15.000 +[action] 'It's' man realizes he's holding a bomb, runs; off-screen explosion. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_08__Full_frontal_nudity/1_Army_protection_racket.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_08__Full_frontal_nudity/1_Army_protection_racket.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..14eaf9e7 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_08__Full_frontal_nudity/1_Army_protection_racket.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,373 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit starts at anchor #1 + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Stock film: tanks rolling, troops advancing. Stirring military music. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:13.000 + +In 1943, a group of British Army Officers working deep behind enemy lines, carried out one of the most dangerous and heroic raids in the history of warfare. But that's as maybe. And now . . . + +00:00:13.000 --> 00:00:17.000 +[caption] AND NOW . . . UNOCCUPIED BRITAIN 1970 + +00:00:17.000 --> 00:00:21.000 +[action] Colonel's office. Colonel at desk. + +00:00:21.000 --> 00:00:23.500 + +Come in, what do you want? + +00:00:23.500 --> 00:00:26.500 +[action] Private Watkins enters and salutes. + +00:00:26.500 --> 00:00:29.500 + +I'd like to leave the army please, sir. + +00:00:29.500 --> 00:00:31.500 + +Good heavens man, why? + +00:00:31.500 --> 00:00:33.500 + +It's dangerous. + +00:00:33.500 --> 00:00:34.800 + +What? + +00:00:34.800 --> 00:00:38.800 + +There are people with guns out there, sir. + +00:00:38.800 --> 00:00:40.000 + +What? + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:45.000 + +Real guns, sir. Not toy ones, sir. Proper ones, sir. They've all got 'em. All of 'em, sir. And some of 'em have got tanks. + +00:00:45.000 --> 00:00:48.000 + +Watkins, they are on our side. + +00:00:48.000 --> 00:00:52.500 + +And grenades, sir. And machine guns, sir. So I'd like to leave, sir, before I get killed, please. + +00:00:52.500 --> 00:00:55.000 + +Watkins, you've only been in the army a day. + +00:00:55.000 --> 00:00:59.500 + +I know sir but people get killed, properly dead, sir, no barley cross fingers, sir. A bloke was telling me, if you're in the army and there's a war you have to go and fight. + +00:00:59.500 --> 00:01:01.500 + +That's true. + +00:01:01.500 --> 00:01:04.500 + +Well I mean, blimey, I mean if it was a big war somebody could be hurt. + +00:01:04.500 --> 00:01:07.500 + +Watkins why did you join the army? + +00:01:07.500 --> 00:01:12.000 + +For the water-skiing and for the travel, sir. And not for the killing, sir. I asked them to put it on my form, sir - no killing. + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:14.500 + +Watkins are you a pacifist? + +00:01:14.500 --> 00:01:17.000 + +No sir, I'm not a pacifist, sir. I'm a coward. + +00:01:17.000 --> 00:01:20.000 + +That's a very silly line. Sit down. + +00:01:20.000 --> 00:01:22.500 + +Yes sir. Silly, sir. [action] sits in corner + +00:01:22.500 --> 00:01:24.000 + +Awfully bad. + +00:01:24.000 --> 00:01:26.500 +[action] Knock at door; sergeant enters and salutes. + +00:01:26.500 --> 00:01:29.500 + +Two civilian gentlemen to see you … sir! + +00:01:29.500 --> 00:01:31.500 + +Show them in please, sergeant. + +00:01:31.500 --> 00:01:34.000 + +Mr Dino Vercotti and Mr Luigi Vercotti. + +00:01:34.000 --> 00:01:36.500 +[action] The Vercotti brothers enter in Mafia suits and dark glasses. + +00:01:36.500 --> 00:01:38.500 + +Good morning, colonel. + +00:01:38.500 --> 00:01:41.500 + +Good morning gentlemen. Now what can I do for you. + +00:01:41.500 --> 00:01:45.500 + +[action] Looking around casually. You've … you've got a nice army base here, colonel. + +00:01:45.500 --> 00:01:46.800 + +Yes. + +00:01:46.800 --> 00:01:49.500 + +We wouldn't want anything to happen to it. + +00:01:49.500 --> 00:01:50.800 + +What? + +00:01:50.800 --> 00:01:55.000 + +No, what my brother means is it would be a shame if… [action] knocks something off mantel + +00:01:55.000 --> 00:01:56.200 + +Oh. + +00:01:56.200 --> 00:01:57.800 + +Oh sorry, colonel. + +00:01:57.800 --> 00:02:01.000 + +Well don't worry about that. But please do sit down. + +00:02:01.000 --> 00:02:03.500 + +No, we prefer to stand, thank you, colonel. + +00:02:03.500 --> 00:02:06.000 + +All right. All right. But what do you want? + +00:02:06.000 --> 00:02:08.000 + +What do we want, ha ha ha. + +00:02:08.000 --> 00:02:10.000 + +Ha ha ha, very good, colonel. + +00:02:10.000 --> 00:02:12.000 + +The colonel's a joker, Luigi. + +00:02:12.000 --> 00:02:14.000 + +Explain it to the colonel, Dino. + +00:02:14.000 --> 00:02:16.000 + +How many tanks you got, colonel? + +00:02:16.000 --> 00:02:18.500 + +About five hundred altogether. + +00:02:18.500 --> 00:02:20.000 + +Five hundred! Hey! + +00:02:20.000 --> 00:02:22.000 + +You ought to be careful, colonel. + +00:02:22.000 --> 00:02:24.500 + +We are careful, extremely careful. + +00:02:24.500 --> 00:02:27.000 + +'Cos things break, don't they? + +00:02:27.000 --> 00:02:28.200 + +Break? + +00:02:28.200 --> 00:02:32.000 + +Well everything breaks, don't it colonel. [action] breaks something on desk Oh dear. + +00:02:32.000 --> 00:02:36.500 + +Oh see my brother's clumsy colonel, and when he gets unhappy he breaks things. Like say, he don't feel the army's playing fair by him, he may start breaking things, colonel. + +00:02:36.500 --> 00:02:38.500 + +What is all this about? + +00:02:38.500 --> 00:02:41.000 + +How many men you got here, colonel? + +00:02:41.000 --> 00:02:47.000 + +Oh, er … seven thousand infantry, six hundred artillery, and er, two divisions of paratroops. + +00:02:47.000 --> 00:02:48.500 + +Paratroops, Dino. + +00:02:48.500 --> 00:02:51.000 + +Be a shame if someone was to set fire to them. + +00:02:51.000 --> 00:02:53.000 + +Set fire to them? + +00:02:53.000 --> 00:02:54.800 + +Fires happen, colonel. + +00:02:54.800 --> 00:02:56.500 + +Things burn. + +00:02:56.500 --> 00:02:58.500 + +Look, what is all this about? + +00:02:58.500 --> 00:03:01.000 + +My brother and I have got a little proposition for you colonel. + +00:03:01.000 --> 00:03:03.000 + +Could save you a lot of bother. + +00:03:03.000 --> 00:03:05.500 + +I mean you're doing all right here aren't you, colonel. + +00:03:05.500 --> 00:03:10.000 + +Well suppose some of your tanks was to get broken and troops started getting lost, er, fights started breaking out during general inspection, like. + +00:03:10.000 --> 00:03:12.500 + +It wouldn't be good for business would it, colonel? + +00:03:12.500 --> 00:03:14.500 + +Are you threatening me? + +00:03:14.500 --> 00:03:16.000 + +Oh, no, no, no. + +00:03:16.000 --> 00:03:18.000 + +Whatever made you think that, colonel? + +00:03:18.000 --> 00:03:20.000 + +The colonel doesn't think we're nice people, Luigi. + +00:03:20.000 --> 00:03:21.800 + +We're your buddies, colonel. + +00:03:21.800 --> 00:03:24.000 + +We want to look after you. + +00:03:24.000 --> 00:03:27.500 + +Look after me? + +00:03:27.500 --> 00:03:31.000 + +We can guarantee you that not a single armoured division will get done over for fifteen bob a week. + +00:03:31.000 --> 00:03:32.500 + +No, no, no. + +00:03:32.500 --> 00:03:33.800 + +Twelve and six. + +00:03:33.800 --> 00:03:35.200 + +No, no, no. + +00:03:35.200 --> 00:03:38.000 + +Eight and six … five bob… + +00:03:38.000 --> 00:03:40.000 + +No, no this is silly. + +00:03:40.000 --> 00:03:41.800 + +What's silly? + +00:03:41.800 --> 00:03:47.500 + +No, the whole premise is silly and it's very badly written. I'm the senior officer here and I haven't had a funny line yet. So I'm stopping it. + +00:03:47.500 --> 00:03:49.500 + +You can't do that! + +00:03:49.500 --> 00:03:51.500 + +I've done it. The sketch is over. + +00:03:51.500 --> 00:03:54.500 + +I want to leave the army please sir, it's dangerous. + +00:03:54.500 --> 00:03:59.500 + +Look, I stopped your sketch five minutes ago. So get out of shot. Right director! Close up. Zoom in on me. [action] camera zooms in That's better. + +00:03:59.500 --> 00:04:02.000 + +[off] It's only 'cos you couldn't think of a punch line. + +00:04:02.000 --> 00:04:05.500 + +Not true, not true. It's time for the cartoon. Cue telecine, ten, nine, eight… + +00:04:05.500 --> 00:04:07.500 +[action] Cut to telecine countdown. + +00:04:07.500 --> 00:04:10.000 + +[off] The general public's not going to understand this, are they? + +00:04:10.000 --> 00:04:12.000 + +[off] Shut up you eyeties! + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_08__Full_frontal_nudity/2_Vox_pops_on_full_frontal_nudity.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_08__Full_frontal_nudity/2_Vox_pops_on_full_frontal_nudity.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..bacf8018 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_08__Full_frontal_nudity/2_Vox_pops_on_full_frontal_nudity.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,22 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit starts at anchor #2 + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 +[action] Cartoon rubbish titled 'Full Frontal Nudity' ends; cut to two naked men. + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:07.000 + +Full frontal nudity - never. What do you think, Barbara? + +00:00:07.000 --> 00:00:10.000 + +Oh, no, no, no…unless it was artistically valid, of course. + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:12.000 +[action] Cut to stockbroker. + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:17.000 + +Full frontal nudity? Yes I'd do it, if it was valid. Or if the money was valid, and if it were a very small part. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_08__Full_frontal_nudity/3_Art_critic_-_the_place_of_the_nude.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_08__Full_frontal_nudity/3_Art_critic_-_the_place_of_the_nude.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..2e8cee43 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_08__Full_frontal_nudity/3_Art_critic_-_the_place_of_the_nude.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,38 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit starts at anchor #3 + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:03.000 +[caption] AN ART CRITIC + +00:00:03.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Art critic examines a nude painting; sees camera and starts guiltily. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:23.000 + +Good evening. I'd like to talk to you tonight about the place of the nude in my bed … um … in the history of my bed … of art, of art, I'm sorry. The place of the nude in the history of tart… call-girl… I'm sorry. I'll start again… Bum … oh what a giveaway. The place of the nude in art. [action] a seductively dressed girl enters slinkily Oh hello there father, er confessor, professor, your honour, your grace … + +00:00:23.000 --> 00:00:25.000 + +[cutely] I'm not your Grace, I'm your Elsie. + +00:00:25.000 --> 00:00:27.000 + +What a terrible joke! + +00:00:27.000 --> 00:00:29.000 + +[crying] But it's my only line! + +00:00:29.000 --> 00:00:34.000 +[action] Idyllic countryside; lyrical pan with birdsong. + +00:00:34.000 --> 00:00:38.000 +[caption] BUT THERE LET US LEAVE THE ART CRITIC TO STRANGLE HIS WIFE AND MOVE ON TO PASTURES NEW + +00:00:38.000 --> 00:00:46.000 +[action] Camera pan passes art critic strangling his wife; he hums and pretends innocence; resumes strangling as pan leaves. + +00:00:46.000 --> 00:00:58.000 +[action] Pan continues: bridegroom carries bride across field, through traffic, into department store furniture floor. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_08__Full_frontal_nudity/4_Buying_a_bed.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_08__Full_frontal_nudity/4_Buying_a_bed.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..7f61ab34 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_08__Full_frontal_nudity/4_Buying_a_bed.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,255 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit starts at anchor #4 + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:03.000 + +We want to buy a bed, please. + +00:00:03.000 --> 00:00:07.000 + +Og, certainly, I'll, I'll get someone to help you. [call] Mr Verity! + +00:00:07.000 --> 00:00:09.500 + +Can I help you, sir? + +00:00:09.500 --> 00:00:13.000 + +Er yes. We'd like to buy a bed…a double bed…about fifty pounds? + +00:00:13.000 --> 00:00:16.000 + +Oh no, I'm afraid not, sir. Our cheapest bed is eight hundred pounds, sir. + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:17.500 + +Eight hundred pounds! + +00:00:17.500 --> 00:00:24.000 + +Or, er, perhaps I should have explained. Mr Verity does tend to exaggerate, so every figure he gives you will be ten times too high. Otherwise he's perfectly all right, perfectly ha, ha, ha. + +00:00:24.000 --> 00:00:27.000 + +Oh I see. I see. So your cheapest bed then is eighty pounds? + +00:00:27.000 --> 00:00:29.500 + +Eight hundred pounds, yes, sir. + +00:00:29.500 --> 00:00:31.500 + +And how wide is it? + +00:00:31.500 --> 00:00:34.000 + +Er, the width is, er, sixty feet wide. + +00:00:34.000 --> 00:00:38.000 + +Oh… [aside to wife, laughing politely] six foot wide, eh. And the length? + +00:00:38.000 --> 00:00:42.000 + +The length is … er … [calls off] Lambert! What is the length of the Comfydown Majorette? + +00:00:42.000 --> 00:00:44.000 + +Er, two foot long. + +00:00:44.000 --> 00:00:45.500 + +Two foot long? + +00:00:45.500 --> 00:00:50.000 + +Ah yes, you have to remember of course, to multiply everything Mr Lambert says by three. Er, it's nothing he can help, you understand. Apart from that he's perfectly all right. + +00:00:50.000 --> 00:00:51.500 + +I see, I'm sorry. + +00:00:51.500 --> 00:00:55.000 + +But it does mean that when he says a bed is two foot wide, it is in fact sixty foot wide. + +00:00:55.000 --> 00:00:56.800 + +Oh, yes I see… + +00:00:56.800 --> 00:00:58.800 + +And that's not counting the mattress. + +00:00:58.800 --> 00:01:00.800 + +Oh, how much is that? + +00:01:00.800 --> 00:01:05.000 + +Er, Mr Lambert will be able to help you there. [calls] Lambert! Will you show these twenty good people the, er, dog kennels, please? + +00:01:05.000 --> 00:01:06.500 + +Mm? Certainly. + +00:01:06.500 --> 00:01:09.000 + +Dog kennel? No, no, no, mattresses, mattresses! + +00:01:09.000 --> 00:01:13.000 + +Oh no, no you have to say dog kennel to Mr Lambert because if you say mattress he puts a bag over his head. I should have explained. Apart from that he's really all right. + +00:01:13.000 --> 00:01:14.500 +[action] They go to Lambert. + +00:01:14.500 --> 00:01:17.000 + +Ah, hum, er we'd like to see the dog kennels please. + +00:01:17.000 --> 00:01:18.500 + +Dog kennels? + +00:01:18.500 --> 00:01:20.500 + +Yes, we want to see the dog kennels. + +00:01:20.500 --> 00:01:23.000 + +Ah yes, well that's the pets' department. Second floor. + +00:01:23.000 --> 00:01:25.000 + +Oh, no, no, we want to see the dog kennels. + +00:01:25.000 --> 00:01:27.000 + +Yes, pets department second floor. + +00:01:27.000 --> 00:01:31.000 + +No, we don't really want to see dog kennels only your colleague said we ought to… + +00:01:31.000 --> 00:01:33.000 + +Oh dear, what's he been telling you now? + +00:01:33.000 --> 00:01:35.500 + +Well, he said we should say dog kennels instead of mattress. + +00:01:35.500 --> 00:01:37.000 +[action] Lambert puts bag over head. + +00:01:37.000 --> 00:01:39.000 + +[looking around] Oh dear. Hello? + +00:01:39.000 --> 00:01:41.000 + +Did you say mattress? + +00:01:41.000 --> 00:01:42.500 + +Well, a little yes. + +00:01:42.500 --> 00:01:48.000 + +I did ask you not to say mattress, didn't I? Now I've got to stand in the tea chest. [action] he gets in the chest and sings 'And did those feet in ancient times, walk upon England's mountains green…' + +00:01:48.000 --> 00:01:50.000 +[action] The manager enters. + +00:01:50.000 --> 00:01:52.000 + +Oh dear, did somebody say mattress to Mr Lambert? + +00:01:52.000 --> 00:01:56.000 +[action] Manager and Verity continue to sing. Lambert removes bag; manager exits after warning bride and groom. + +00:01:56.000 --> 00:01:59.000 + +[getting out of chest] He should be all right now, but don't, you know… don't! + +00:01:59.000 --> 00:02:02.000 + +Oh, no, no, no. er,, we'd like to see, see the dog kennels please? + +00:02:02.000 --> 00:02:03.500 + +Yes, second floor. + +00:02:03.500 --> 00:02:06.500 + +No, no, look these [pointing] dog kennels here, see? + +00:02:06.500 --> 00:02:08.000 + +Mattresses? + +00:02:08.000 --> 00:02:09.500 + +Oh [jumps]…yes. + +00:02:09.500 --> 00:02:15.000 + +Well, if you meant mattress, why dodn't you say a mattress? I mean, it's very confusing for me if you go and say dog kennels when you mean mattress. Why not just say mattress? + +00:02:15.000 --> 00:02:17.500 + +Well, I mean you put a bag over your head last time I said mattress. + +00:02:17.500 --> 00:02:21.500 +[action] Bag goes on. Verity sighs, jumps in box. Manager joins; they sing 'And did those feet…'. Another assistant arrives. + +00:02:21.500 --> 00:02:23.500 + +Did somebody say mattress to Mr Lambert? + +00:02:23.500 --> 00:02:24.800 + +Twice. + +00:02:24.800 --> 00:02:27.500 + +Hey, everybody, somebody said mattress to Mr Lambert, twice. + +00:02:27.500 --> 00:02:31.000 +[action] Assistant, groom and bride join the therapy. + +00:02:31.000 --> 00:02:32.500 + +It's not working. We need more! + +00:02:32.500 --> 00:02:37.000 +[action] Cut to crowd in St. Peter's Square singing 'Jerusalem'. Cut back; Lambert removes bag and looks at couple. + +00:02:37.000 --> 00:02:39.000 + +Now, er, can I help you? + +00:02:39.000 --> 00:02:40.500 + +We want a mattress. + +00:02:40.500 --> 00:02:42.000 +[action] Lambert immediately bags head. + +00:02:42.000 --> 00:02:45.000 + +Oh. What did you say that for? What did you say that for? + +00:02:45.000 --> 00:02:47.000 + +[weeping] But it's my only line! + +00:02:47.000 --> 00:02:49.000 + +Well, you didn't have to say it. + +00:02:49.000 --> 00:02:52.000 +[action] They all hop off. She howls. Cut to vox pops. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_08__Full_frontal_nudity/5_Hermits.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_08__Full_frontal_nudity/5_Hermits.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..7bff770a --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_08__Full_frontal_nudity/5_Hermits.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,200 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit starts at anchor #5 + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:02.500 +[action] Two hermits on a hillside. + +00:00:02.500 --> 00:00:05.500 + +Hello, are you a hermit by any chance? + +00:00:05.500 --> 00:00:08.000 + +Yes that's right. Are you a hermit? + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:09.500 + +Yes, I certainly am. + +00:00:09.500 --> 00:00:12.500 + +Well I never. What are you getting away from? + +00:00:12.500 --> 00:00:16.500 + +Oh you know, the usual - people, chat, gossip, you know. + +00:00:16.500 --> 00:00:21.000 + +Oh I certainly do - it was the same with me. I mean there comes a time when you realize there's no good frittering your life away in idleness and trivial chit-chat. Where's your cave? + +00:00:21.000 --> 00:00:23.000 + +Oh, up the goat track, first on the left. + +00:00:23.000 --> 00:00:25.000 + +Oh they're very nice up there, aren't they? + +00:00:25.000 --> 00:00:26.500 + +Yes they are, I've got a beauty. + +00:00:26.500 --> 00:00:28.500 + +A bit drafty though, aren't they? + +00:00:28.500 --> 00:00:30.500 + +No, we've had ours insulated. + +00:00:30.500 --> 00:00:31.800 + +Oh yes. + +00:00:31.800 --> 00:00:35.000 + +Yes, I used birds' nests, moss and oak leaves round the outside. + +00:00:35.000 --> 00:00:36.500 + +Oh, sounds marvellous. + +00:00:36.500 --> 00:00:40.000 + +Oh it's a treat, it really is, 'cos otherwise those stone caves can be so grim. + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:42.000 + +Yes they really can be, can't they? They really can. + +00:00:42.000 --> 00:00:43.000 + +Oh yes. + +00:00:43.000 --> 00:00:44.500 +[action] Third hermit passes by. + +00:00:44.500 --> 00:00:46.000 + +Morning Frank. + +00:00:46.000 --> 00:00:50.500 + +Morning Norman. Talking of moss, er you know Mr Robinson? + +00:00:50.500 --> 00:00:52.500 + +With the, er, green loin cloth? + +00:00:52.500 --> 00:00:56.000 + +Er no, that's Mr Seagrave. Mr Robinson's the hermit who lodges with Mr Seagrave. + +00:00:56.000 --> 00:00:57.500 + +Oh I see, yes. + +00:00:57.500 --> 00:01:00.000 + +Yes well he's put me onto wattles. + +00:01:00.000 --> 00:01:01.200 + +Really? + +00:01:01.200 --> 00:01:03.500 + +Yes. Swears by them. Yes. + +00:01:03.500 --> 00:01:05.000 +[action] Fourth hermit passes by. + +00:01:05.000 --> 00:01:06.500 + +Morning Frank. + +00:01:06.500 --> 00:01:12.500 + +Morning Lionel. Well he says that moss tends to fall off the cave walls during cold weather. You know you might get a really bad spell and half the moss drops off the cave wall, leaving you cold. + +00:01:12.500 --> 00:01:15.000 + +Oh well, Mr Robinson's cave's never been exactly nirvana has it? + +00:01:15.000 --> 00:01:18.500 + +Well, quite, that's what I mean. Anyway, Mr Rogers, he's the, er, hermit… + +00:01:18.500 --> 00:01:20.000 + +… on the end. + +00:01:20.000 --> 00:01:23.000 + +. .. up at the top, yes. Well he tried wattles and he came out in a rash. + +00:01:23.000 --> 00:01:24.200 + +Really? + +00:01:24.200 --> 00:01:27.500 + +Yes, and there's me with half a wall wattled, I mean what'll I do? + +00:01:27.500 --> 00:01:31.000 + +Well why don't you try birds nests like I've done? Or else, dead bracken. + +00:01:31.000 --> 00:01:33.000 + +[distant call] Frank! + +00:01:33.000 --> 00:01:34.500 + +Yes Han. + +00:01:34.500 --> 00:01:36.000 + +Can I borrow your goat? + +00:01:36.000 --> 00:01:46.000 + +Er, yes that'll be all right. Oh leave me a pint for breakfast will you? … [to first hermit] You see, you know that is the trouble with living half way up a cliff - you feel so cut off. You know it takes me two hours every morning to get out onto the moors, collect my berries, chastise myself, and two hours back in the evening. + +00:01:46.000 --> 00:01:49.000 + +Still there's one thing about being a hermit, at least you meet people. + +00:01:49.000 --> 00:01:51.500 + +Oh yes, I wouldn't go back to public relations. + +00:01:51.500 --> 00:01:53.500 + +Oh well, bye for now Frank, must toddle. + +00:01:53.500 --> 00:01:57.500 + +[action] Colonel enters.] Right, you two hermits, stop that sketch. I think it's silly. + +00:01:57.500 --> 00:01:59.000 + +What? + +00:01:59.000 --> 00:02:00.500 + +It's silly. + +00:02:00.500 --> 00:02:03.500 + +What do you mean, you can't stop it - it's on film. + +00:02:03.500 --> 00:02:09.000 + +That doesn't make any difference to the viewer at home, does it? Come on, get out. Out. Come on out, all of you. Get off, go on, all of you. Go on, move, move. Go on, get out. Come on, get out, move, move. + +00:02:09.000 --> 00:02:11.500 +[action] He shoos hermits and crew off the hillside. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_08__Full_frontal_nudity/6_Dead_parrot.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_08__Full_frontal_nudity/6_Dead_parrot.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..7d072a83 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_08__Full_frontal_nudity/6_Dead_parrot.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,293 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit starts at anchor #6 + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:03.500 +[action] Animation link with dancing Botticelli Venus. Mr. Praline enters pet shop carrying a caged parrot. + +00:00:03.500 --> 00:00:06.500 + +Hello, I wish to register a complaint…Hello? Miss? + +00:00:06.500 --> 00:00:08.500 + +What do you mean, miss? + +00:00:08.500 --> 00:00:11.500 + +Oh I'm sorry, I have a cold. I wish to make a complaint! + +00:00:11.500 --> 00:00:13.500 + +Sorry, we're closing for lunch. + +00:00:13.500 --> 00:00:18.000 + +Never mind that, my lad. I wish to complain about this parrot what I purchased not half an hour ago from this very boutique. + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:20.500 + +Oh yes, the, the Norwegian Blue. What's wrong with it? + +00:00:20.500 --> 00:00:22.500 + +I'll tell you what's wrong with it, my lad. It's dead, that's what's wrong with it! + +00:00:22.500 --> 00:00:24.500 + +No, no, it's resting, look! + +00:00:24.500 --> 00:00:27.500 + +Look my lad, I know a dead parrot when I see one, and I'm looking at one right now. + +00:00:27.500 --> 00:00:29.500 + +No no sir. it's not dead. It's resting! + +00:00:29.500 --> 00:00:30.800 + +Resting? + +00:00:30.800 --> 00:00:33.500 + +Yeah, remarkable bird, the Norwegian Blue, beautiful plumage, innit? + +00:00:33.500 --> 00:00:35.500 + +The plumage don't enter into it - it's stone dead. + +00:00:35.500 --> 00:00:37.000 + +No, no - it's just resting! + +00:00:37.000 --> 00:00:41.500 + +All right then, if it's restin', I'll wake him up! [shouts into cage] Hello Polly! I've got a nice cuttlefish for you when you wake up, Polly Parrot! + +00:00:41.500 --> 00:00:43.500 + +[jogs the cage] There, it moved! + +00:00:43.500 --> 00:00:46.000 + +No, he didn't. That was you pushing the cage! + +00:00:46.000 --> 00:00:47.500 + +I did not. + +00:00:47.500 --> 00:00:54.000 + +Yes, you did! [action] takes parrot out; bangs it against counter, throws it in air, it falls. Now that's what I call a dead parrot. + +00:00:54.000 --> 00:00:55.500 + +No, no. It's stunned. + +00:00:55.500 --> 00:01:01.500 + +Look my lad, I've had just about enough of this. That parrot is definitely deceased. And when I bought it not half an hour ago, you assured me that its lack of movement was due to it being tired and shagged out after a long squawk. + +00:01:01.500 --> 00:01:03.500 + +It's probably pining for the fjords. + +00:01:03.500 --> 00:01:06.000 + +Pining for the fjords, what kind of talk is that? Look, why did it fall flat on its back the moment I got it home? + +00:01:06.000 --> 00:01:08.000 + +The Norwegian Blue prefers kipping on it's back! Beautiful bird, lovely plumage! + +00:01:08.000 --> 00:01:11.500 + +Look, I took the liberty of examining that parrot, and I discovered the only reason that it had been sitting on its perch in the first place was that it had been nailed there. + +00:01:11.500 --> 00:01:14.000 + +Well of course it was nailed there. Otherwise it would muscle up to those bars and voom. + +00:01:14.000 --> 00:01:17.500 + +Look matey [picks up the parrot] this parrot wouldn't voom if you put four thousand volts through it! It's bleedin' demised! + +00:01:17.500 --> 00:01:19.000 + +It's not, it's pining! + +00:01:19.000 --> 00:01:28.000 + +It's not pining, it's passed on. This parrot is no more! It has ceased to be. It's expired and gone to meet its maker.This is a late parrot. It's a stiff. Bereft of life, it rests in peace. If you hadn't nailed it to the perch it would be pushing up the daisies. It's rung down the curtain and joined the choir invisible. This is an ex-parrot. + +00:01:28.000 --> 00:01:30.000 + +Well, I'd better replace it, then. + +00:01:30.000 --> 00:01:32.500 + +[to camera] If you want to get anything done in this country you've got to complain till you're blue in the mouth. + +00:01:32.500 --> 00:01:34.000 + +Sorry guv, we're right out of parrots. + +00:01:34.000 --> 00:01:35.500 + +I see. I see. I get the picture. + +00:01:35.500 --> 00:01:37.500 + +[pause] I got a slug. + +00:01:37.500 --> 00:01:39.000 + +Does it talk? + +00:01:39.000 --> 00:01:40.000 + +Not really, no. + +00:01:40.000 --> 00:01:42.500 + +Well, it's scarcely a replacement, then is it? + +00:01:42.500 --> 00:01:47.000 + +Listen, I'll tell you what, [hands over card] tell you what, if you go to my brother's pet shop in Bolton he'll replace your parrot for you. + +00:01:47.000 --> 00:01:48.500 + +Bolton eh? + +00:01:48.500 --> 00:01:49.500 + +Yeah. + +00:01:49.500 --> 00:01:50.500 + +All right. + +00:01:50.500 --> 00:01:53.000 +[action] He leaves holding the parrot. + +00:01:53.000 --> 00:01:56.000 +[caption] A SIMILAR PET SHOP IN BOLTON; LANCS + +00:01:56.000 --> 00:02:02.000 +[action] Pull back from 'Similar Pet Shops, Ltd.' sign; same pet shop; shopkeeper now with moustache. Praline enters, notices empty parrot cage. + +00:02:02.000 --> 00:02:03.500 + +Er, excuse me. This is Bolton, is it? + +00:02:03.500 --> 00:02:05.000 + +No, no it's, er, Ipswich. + +00:02:05.000 --> 00:02:08.000 + +[to camera] That's Inter-City Rail for you. [action] leaves + +00:02:08.000 --> 00:02:10.000 +[action] Complaints desk, railways. Praline approaches porter. + +00:02:10.000 --> 00:02:11.500 + +I wish to make a complaint. + +00:02:11.500 --> 00:02:13.500 + +I don't have to do this, you know. + +00:02:13.500 --> 00:02:14.800 + +I beg your pardon. + +00:02:14.800 --> 00:02:18.500 + +I'm a qualified brain surgeon. I only do this because I like being my own boss. + +00:02:18.500 --> 00:02:21.000 + +Er, excuse me, this is irrelevant, isn't it. + +00:02:21.000 --> 00:02:23.500 + +Oh yeah, it's not easy to pad these out to thirty minutes. + +00:02:23.500 --> 00:02:28.000 + +Well I wish to make a complaint. I got on the Bolton train and found myself deposited here in Ipswich. + +00:02:28.000 --> 00:02:29.500 + +No, this is Bolton. + +00:02:29.500 --> 00:02:31.500 + +[to camera] The pet shop owner's brother was lying. + +00:02:31.500 --> 00:02:33.500 + +Well you can't blame British Rail for that. + +00:02:33.500 --> 00:02:35.500 + +If this is Bolton, I shall return to the pet shop. + +00:02:35.500 --> 00:02:37.000 +[caption] A LITTLE LATER LTD + +00:02:37.000 --> 00:02:39.500 +[action] Praline re-enters pet shop. + +00:02:39.500 --> 00:02:41.000 + +I understand that this is Bolton. + +00:02:41.000 --> 00:02:41.800 + +Yes. + +00:02:41.800 --> 00:02:43.500 + +Well, you told me it was Ipswich. + +00:02:43.500 --> 00:02:44.800 + +It was a pun. + +00:02:44.800 --> 00:02:45.800 + +A pun? + +00:02:45.800 --> 00:02:49.000 + +No, no, not a pun, no. What's the other thing which reads the same backwards as forwards? + +00:02:49.000 --> 00:02:50.000 + +A palindrome? + +00:02:50.000 --> 00:02:51.000 + +Yes, yes. + +00:02:51.000 --> 00:02:54.000 + +It's not a palindrome. The palindrome of Bolton would be Notlob. It don't work. + +00:02:54.000 --> 00:02:55.500 + +Look, what do you want. + +00:02:55.500 --> 00:02:59.000 + +No I'm sorry, I'm not prepared to pursue my line of enquiry any further as I think this is getting too silly. + +00:02:59.000 --> 00:03:02.000 + +[action] Colonel enters] Quite agree. Quite agree. Silly. Silly…silly. Right get on with it. Get on with it. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_08__Full_frontal_nudity/7_The_flasher.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_08__Full_frontal_nudity/7_The_flasher.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..0061e860 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_08__Full_frontal_nudity/7_The_flasher.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,21 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit starts at anchor #7 + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:05.000 +[action] Announcer eating yoghurt; spots camera; shuffles papers. + +00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:10.000 + +Oh…er…oh…um. Oh!…er… [shuffles paper] I'm sorry…and now frontal nudity. + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:18.000 +[action] Handheld tracking: shabby man in long overcoat flashes three passers-by; turns to camera and opens coat to reveal sign: 'boo'. + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:21.000 +[action] Cut back to announcer eating yoghurt; colonel nudges him. + +00:00:21.000 --> 00:00:24.000 + +Oh, oh I'm sorry. I thought the film was longer. [shuffling papers] Ah. Now Notlob, er, Bolton. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_08__Full_frontal_nudity/8_Hell's_Grannies.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_08__Full_frontal_nudity/8_Hell's_Grannies.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..79cc5c47 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_08__Full_frontal_nudity/8_Hell's_Grannies.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,117 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit starts at anchor #8 + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:05.000 +[action] Pan across Bolton; reporter voice-over begins. + +00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:13.000 + +This is a frightened city. Over these houses, over these streets hangs a pall of fear. Fear of a new kind of violence which is terrorizing the city. Yes, gangs of old ladies attacking defenseless, fit young men. + +00:00:13.000 --> 00:00:18.000 +[action] Old ladies beat up two young men; grannies walk aggressively, pushing passers-by. + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:21.500 + +Well they come up to you, like, and push you - shove you off the pavement, like. There's usually four or five of them. + +00:00:21.500 --> 00:00:25.000 + +Yeah, this used to be a nice neighbourhood before the old ladies started moving in. Nowadays some of us daren't even go down to the shops. + +00:00:25.000 --> 00:00:28.500 + +Well Mr Johnson's son Kevin, he don't go out any more. He comes back from wrestling and locks himself in his room. + +00:00:28.500 --> 00:00:31.000 +[action] Grannies harass an attractive girl. + +00:00:31.000 --> 00:00:33.500 + +What are they in it for, these old hoodlums, these layabouts in lace? + +00:00:33.500 --> 00:00:35.000 + +[voice over] Well it's something to do isn't it? + +00:00:35.000 --> 00:00:36.000 + +[voice over] It's good fun. + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:37.500 + +[voice over] It's like you know, well, innit, eh? + +00:00:37.500 --> 00:00:40.000 + +Favourite targets for the old ladies are telephone kiosks. + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:44.000 +[action] Grannies carry off a telephone kiosk; paint slogans on a wall. + +00:00:44.000 --> 00:00:50.000 + +[approaching] Well come on, come on, off with you. Clear out, come on get out of it. [they clear off; to camera] We have a lot of trouble with these oldies. Pension day's the worst - they go mad. As soon as they get their hands on their money they blow it all on milk, bread, tea, tin of meat for the cat. + +00:00:50.000 --> 00:00:51.500 +[action] Cut to cinema. + +00:00:51.500 --> 00:00:56.500 + +Yes, well of course they come here for the two o'clock matinee, all the old bags out in there, especially if it's something like 'The Sound of Music'. We get seats ripped up, hearing aids broken, all that sort of thing. + +00:00:56.500 --> 00:01:00.000 +[action] Policeman hustles two grannies out. Cut to reporter walking along street. + +00:01:00.000 --> 00:01:07.000 + +The whole problem of these senile delinquents lies in their complete rejection of the values of contemporary society. They've seen their children grow up and become accountants, stockbrokers and even sociologists, and they begin to wonder if it is all really… [action] disappears down manhole rapidly] arggh! + +00:01:07.000 --> 00:01:09.500 +[action] Two grannies replace manhole cover. Cut to young couple. + +00:01:09.500 --> 00:01:13.000 + +Oh well we sometimes feel we're to blame in some way for what our gran's become. I mean she used to be happy here until she, she started on the crochet. + +00:01:13.000 --> 00:01:14.000 + +[off] Crochet? + +00:01:14.000 --> 00:01:18.500 + +Yeah. Now she can't do without it. Twenty balls of wool a day, sometimes. If she can't get the wool she gets violent. What can we do about it? + +00:01:18.500 --> 00:01:23.000 +[action] Grannies on motorbikes roar through streets and a shop; jacket reads 'Hell's Grannies'. + +00:01:23.000 --> 00:01:26.000 + +But this is not just an old ladies' town. There are other equally dangerous gangs - such as the baby snatchers. + +00:01:26.000 --> 00:01:31.000 +[action] Five men in baby outfits carry off a young man outside a shop. Cut to distraught wife. + +00:01:31.000 --> 00:01:34.000 + +I just left my husband out here while I went in to do some shopping and I came back and he was gone. He was only forty-seven. + +00:01:34.000 --> 00:01:36.500 + +And on the road too, vicious gangs of keep left signs. + +00:01:36.500 --> 00:01:39.000 +[action] Two keep-left signs attack a vicar. + +00:01:39.000 --> 00:01:46.000 + +[approaches and stops action] Right, right, stop it. This film's got silly. Started off with a nice little idea about grannies attacking young men, but now it's got silly. This man's hair is too long for a vicar too. These signs are pretty badly made. Right, now for a complete change of mood. + +00:01:46.000 --> 00:01:47.500 +[action] Cut to man in dirty raincoat. + +00:01:47.500 --> 00:01:49.500 + +I've heard of unisex but I've never had it. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_09__The_ant,_an_introduction/0_Episode9_head_tail.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_09__The_ant,_an_introduction/0_Episode9_head_tail.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..09976f53 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_09__The_ant,_an_introduction/0_Episode9_head_tail.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,20 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Intro titles and end credits. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:03.000 +[action] A forest. Distant explosion; the 'It's' man runs rapidly up to camera. + +00:00:03.000 --> 00:00:04.500 + +It's... + +00:00:04.500 --> 00:00:07.500 +[caption] 'MONTY PYTHON'S FLYING CIRCUS' + +00:00:07.500 --> 00:00:11.000 +[action] Opening animated titles. + +00:09:20.000 --> 00:09:24.000 +[caption] ROLLER: 'THE ANT; AN INTRODUCTION, WAS CONCEIVED, WRITTEN AND PERFORMED BY... (CREDITS)' + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_09__The_ant,_an_introduction/10_The_visitors.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_09__The_ant,_an_introduction/10_The_visitors.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..e5c16781 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_09__The_ant,_an_introduction/10_The_visitors.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,341 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Skit anchor #10. + +00:12:08.000 --> 00:12:12.000 +[action] Sitting room. Low 'sexy' lighting and soft music. Victor and Iris cuddle on sofa. + +00:12:12.000 --> 00:12:14.500 + +Would you mind terribly if I hold your hand? + +00:12:14.500 --> 00:12:16.000 + +Oh no, no, not at all. + +00:12:16.000 --> 00:12:18.500 + +Oh Iris, you're so very beautiful. + +00:12:18.500 --> 00:12:20.500 + +Oh, do you really mean that? + +00:12:20.500 --> 00:12:24.000 + +I do, I do, I do. I think... I'm beginning to fall in love with you. + +00:12:24.000 --> 00:12:25.500 + +Oh Victor. + +00:12:25.500 --> 00:12:27.000 + +It's silly isn't it? + +00:12:27.000 --> 00:12:29.000 + +No, no, not at all dear sweet Victor. + +00:12:29.000 --> 00:12:35.000 + +No I didn't mean that. Only just us being so close together for so many months in the soft-toy department and yet never daring to... + +00:12:35.000 --> 00:12:36.500 + +Oh, oh Victor. + +00:12:36.500 --> 00:12:39.500 + +Oh Iris. (they move to kiss; doorbell rings) + +00:12:39.500 --> 00:12:41.000 + +Who can that be? + +00:12:41.000 --> 00:12:43.000 + +Oh, well you try and get rid of them. + +00:12:43.000 --> 00:12:44.500 + +Yes I will, I will. + +00:12:44.500 --> 00:12:47.000 +[action] Victor opens the door. Arthur Name stands there. + +00:12:47.000 --> 00:12:47.800 + +Hello! + +00:12:47.800 --> 00:12:48.800 + +Hello. + +00:12:48.800 --> 00:12:50.500 + +Remember me? + +00:12:50.500 --> 00:12:52.000 + +No I'm... + +00:12:52.000 --> 00:12:57.000 + +In the pub. The tall thin one with the moustache, remember? About three years ago? + +00:12:57.000 --> 00:12:59.500 + +No, I don't I'm afraid. + +00:12:59.500 --> 00:13:05.000 + +Oh, blimey, it's dark in here, (switches light on) that's better. You said we must have a drink sometime, so I took you up on it—the film society meeting was cancelled. + +00:13:05.000 --> 00:13:08.000 + +Look, to be frank, it is a little awkward this evening. + +00:13:08.000 --> 00:13:12.000 + +(stepping in; to Iris) Hello, I'm Arthur. Arthur Name. Name by name but not by nature. I always say that, don't I Vicky boy? + +00:13:12.000 --> 00:13:13.500 + +Really... + +00:13:13.500 --> 00:13:15.000 + +(to Victor) Is that your wife? + +00:13:15.000 --> 00:13:16.500 + +Er, no, actually. + +00:13:16.500 --> 00:13:20.500 + +Oh, I get the picture. Eh? Don't worry about me Vicky boy, I know all about one-night stands. + +00:13:20.500 --> 00:13:22.000 + +I beg your pardon? + +00:13:22.000 --> 00:13:23.500 + +Mind if I change the record? (removes record) + +00:13:23.500 --> 00:13:25.500 + +Look, look, we put that on. + +00:13:25.500 --> 00:13:29.000 + +Here's a good one, I heard it in a pub. What's brown and sounds like a bell? + +00:13:29.000 --> 00:13:30.500 + +I beg your pardon? + +00:13:30.500 --> 00:13:35.000 + +What's brown and sounds like a bell? Dung! Ha! That's a good one. I like that. I won't keep you long. (Liberty Bell March blares loudly) + +00:13:35.000 --> 00:13:37.000 + +That's better, now don't worry about me. I'll wait here till you've finished. + +00:13:37.000 --> 00:13:38.500 +[action] Doorbell rings again. + +00:13:38.500 --> 00:13:39.800 + +Who the hell... + +00:13:39.800 --> 00:13:42.000 + +I'll get it. It'll be friends of mine. I took the liberty of inviting them along. + +00:13:42.000 --> 00:13:44.500 + +Look, we were hoping to have a quiet evening on our own. + +00:13:44.500 --> 00:13:46.000 + +Oh, they won't mind. They're very broad-minded. Hello! + +00:13:46.000 --> 00:13:49.000 +[action] Mr and Mrs Equator walk in and approach Victor. + +00:13:49.000 --> 00:13:57.000 + +Good evening. My name is Equator, Mr Equator Equator. Like round the middle of the Earth, only with an L. (wheezing laugh) This is my wife Audrey, she smells a bit but she has a heart of gold. + +00:13:57.000 --> 00:13:59.500 + +Hello, ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha... + +00:13:59.500 --> 00:14:03.000 + +There must have been some kind of misunderstanding, because this is not the... + +00:14:03.000 --> 00:14:04.500 + +Who's that then? + +00:14:04.500 --> 00:14:05.800 + +What? + +00:14:05.800 --> 00:14:07.000 + +Who's the bird? + +00:14:07.000 --> 00:14:07.800 + +I'm... + +00:14:07.800 --> 00:14:12.000 + +You got a nice pair there haven't you love. (grabs Iris; wet kiss; Iris screams) Shut up you silly bitch, it was only a bit of fun. + +00:14:12.000 --> 00:14:13.500 + +Now look here ... + +00:14:13.500 --> 00:14:14.800 + +Big gin please. + +00:14:14.800 --> 00:14:15.800 + +I'll get it. + +00:14:15.800 --> 00:14:18.000 + +(following) Look, leave those drinks alone. + +00:14:18.000 --> 00:14:20.000 + +And three tins of beans for me please. + +00:14:20.000 --> 00:14:22.000 + +I told you to lay off the beans, you whore! + +00:14:22.000 --> 00:14:23.500 + +I only want three cans. + +00:14:23.500 --> 00:14:26.000 + +Button your lip you rat-bag. (laughs uproariously) + +00:14:26.000 --> 00:14:27.500 + +(joins) Ha, ha, ha, ha... + +00:14:27.500 --> 00:14:29.500 + +It was rather witty, wasn't it? Where's my gin? + +00:14:29.500 --> 00:14:30.800 +[action] Doorbell rings again. + +00:14:30.800 --> 00:14:32.000 + +Who the hell's that? + +00:14:32.000 --> 00:14:37.000 + +Oh, I took the liberty of inviting an old friend along, as his wife has just passed away, and he's somewhat distraught poor chap. I hope you don't mind. + +00:14:37.000 --> 00:14:38.500 + +(opening door) Come on in. + +00:14:38.500 --> 00:14:41.000 +[action] Mr Freight enters in underpants, sequins, eye make-up, white wellies, necklace. + +00:14:41.000 --> 00:14:43.500 + +Oh? My God, what a simply ghastly place. + +00:14:43.500 --> 00:14:49.000 + +Not too good is it? A pint of crème de menthe for my friend. Well how are you, you great poof? (sits) Bit lumpy ...ah, no wonder, I was sitting on the cat. (throws it into fire) + +00:14:49.000 --> 00:14:51.000 + +Aaaagh! Boo boo hooo. + +00:14:51.000 --> 00:14:54.000 + +I've asked along a simply gorgeous little man I picked up outside the Odeon. + +00:14:54.000 --> 00:14:55.500 + +Is he sexy? + +00:14:55.500 --> 00:14:58.000 +[action] Mr Cook enters with a goat. Freight kisses him. + +00:14:58.000 --> 00:15:01.000 + +I had to bring the goat, he's not well. I only hope he don't go on the carpet. + +00:15:01.000 --> 00:15:03.000 + +(to Iris) Come on then love, drop 'em. + +00:15:03.000 --> 00:15:05.000 + +Aaaaaaagh! (runs out) + +00:15:05.000 --> 00:15:06.500 + +Blimey, she don't go much do she. + +00:15:06.500 --> 00:15:08.500 +[action] He sits; chair collapses. + +00:15:08.500 --> 00:15:11.000 + +Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, oooooh! I've wet 'em + +00:15:11.000 --> 00:15:12.500 + +The goat's just done a bundle. + +00:15:12.500 --> 00:15:15.000 +[action] Group of singers dressed as Welsh miners run on; all talk at once. + +00:15:15.000 --> 00:15:18.000 + +Look, get out all of you. Go on. Get out! Get out! + +00:15:18.000 --> 00:15:19.500 + +I beg your pardon? + +00:15:19.500 --> 00:15:25.000 + +I'm turning you all out. I'm not having my house filled with filthy perverts, now look, I'm giving you just half a minute then I'm going to call the police, so get out. + +00:15:25.000 --> 00:15:28.000 + +I don't much like the tone of your voice. (shoots him) Right let's have a ding dong... + +00:15:28.000 --> 00:15:33.000 + +(singing) Ding dong merrily on high, in Heaven the bells are ringing... + +00:15:33.000 --> 00:15:36.000 +[action] Cut to 'It's' man. + +00:15:36.000 --> 00:15:38.500 + +(in Spanish) Look out, there are llamas! + +00:15:38.500 --> 00:15:44.000 +[action] 'It's' man runs away into forest. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_09__The_ant,_an_introduction/1_Llamas.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_09__The_ant,_an_introduction/1_Llamas.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..4e250a49 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_09__The_ant,_an_introduction/1_Llamas.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,36 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Skit anchor #1. + +00:00:11.000 --> 00:00:13.500 +[caption] 'PART 2' + +00:00:13.500 --> 00:00:16.500 +[caption] 'THE LLAMA' + +00:00:16.500 --> 00:00:21.000 +[action] A Spanish guitarist and dancer in traditional costume enter. + +00:00:21.000 --> 00:00:23.500 +[caption] 'LIVE FROM GOLDERS GREEN' + +00:00:23.500 --> 00:00:31.000 +[action] Man walks to a life-size photo of a llama to give a lecture in Spanish with English supertitles. + +00:00:31.000 --> 00:00:44.000 +[caption] (in Spanish, subtitled) The llama is a quadruped which lives in the big rivers like the Amazon. It has two ears, a heart, a forehead, and a beak for eating honey. But it is provided with fins for swimming. + +00:00:44.000 --> 00:00:47.000 + +Llamas are larger than frogs. + +00:00:47.000 --> 00:00:53.000 +[caption] Llamas are dangerous, so if you see one where people are swimming, you shout... + +00:00:53.000 --> 00:00:55.500 + +Look out, there are llamas! + +00:00:55.500 --> 00:01:02.000 +[action] Graham, in a Spanish frock, enters on a moped; blows up a paper bag and bursts it. They bow. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_09__The_ant,_an_introduction/2_A_man_with_a_tape_recorder_up_his_nose.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_09__The_ant,_an_introduction/2_A_man_with_a_tape_recorder_up_his_nose.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..9ea6d1e2 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_09__The_ant,_an_introduction/2_A_man_with_a_tape_recorder_up_his_nose.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,14 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Skit anchor #2. + +00:01:02.000 --> 00:01:06.000 + +And now for something completely different - a man with a tape recorder up his nose. + +00:01:06.000 --> 00:01:16.000 +[action] Michael, in evening dress on a small stage, ostentatiously inserts a finger up one nostril; 'La Marseillaise' plays. Removes finger; music stops. Inserts finger in other nostril; rewinding noises. + +00:01:16.000 --> 00:01:19.000 +[action] He bows. Stock film of Women's Institute applauding. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_09__The_ant,_an_introduction/3_Kilimanjaro_expedition_(double_vision).vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_09__The_ant,_an_introduction/3_Kilimanjaro_expedition_(double_vision).vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..0f04278c --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_09__The_ant,_an_introduction/3_Kilimanjaro_expedition_(double_vision).vtt @@ -0,0 +1,211 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Skit anchor #3. + +00:01:19.000 --> 00:01:23.000 + +And now for something completely different. The office of Sir George Head, OBE. + +00:01:23.000 --> 00:01:27.000 +[action] Large study with maps and photographs; Sir George Head sits at a large desk. + +00:01:27.000 --> 00:01:28.500 + +Next please. + +00:01:28.500 --> 00:01:31.500 +[action] Arthur walks in and up to the desk. + +00:01:31.500 --> 00:01:34.000 + +(looking up) One at a time please. + +00:01:34.000 --> 00:01:36.000 + +There is only me, sir. + +00:01:36.000 --> 00:01:39.000 + +(putting a hand over one eye) So there is. Take a ... + +00:01:39.000 --> 00:01:40.500 + +Seat? + +00:01:40.500 --> 00:01:45.000 + +Seat! Take a seat. So! (looking over to Bob's right) You want to join my mountaineering expedition do you? (keeps looking off to right) + +00:01:45.000 --> 00:01:47.500 + +(rather uncertain) Me, sir? + +00:01:47.500 --> 00:01:48.800 + +Yes. + +00:01:48.800 --> 00:01:51.500 + +Yes, I'd very much like to, sir. + +00:01:51.500 --> 00:01:56.500 + +Jolly good, jolly good. (ticks sheet; looks straight at Bob) And how about you? + +00:01:56.500 --> 00:01:58.500 + +There is only me, sir. + +00:01:58.500 --> 00:02:03.000 + +(hand over eye; looking both at Bob and to Bob's right) Well bang goes his application then. (tears up form) Now let me fill you in... + +00:02:03.000 --> 00:02:08.000 + +I'm leading this expedition and we're going to climb both peaks of Mount Kilimanjaro. + +00:02:08.000 --> 00:02:10.500 + +I thought there was only one peak, sir. + +00:02:10.500 --> 00:02:17.500 + +(gets up; one hand over one eye; peers point-blank at map) Well, that'll save a bit of time. Well done. Now the object of this expedition is to find any traces of last year's expedition. + +00:02:17.500 --> 00:02:19.500 + +Last year's expedition? + +00:02:19.500 --> 00:02:31.000 + +Yes, my brother was leading that; they were going to build a bridge between the two peaks. My idea I'm afraid. Now, I ought to tell you I have practically everyone I need... so what special qualifications do you have? + +00:02:31.000 --> 00:02:32.500 + +Well, sir... + +00:02:32.500 --> 00:02:34.000 + +Yes, you first. + +00:02:34.000 --> 00:02:36.000 + +There is only me, sir. + +00:02:36.000 --> 00:02:40.000 + +(to Bob's right) I wasn't talking to you. (to Bob) Carry on. + +00:02:40.000 --> 00:02:42.500 + +Well I'm a fully qualified mountaineer. + +00:02:42.500 --> 00:02:52.000 + +Mountaineer? (checks dictionary) ...a mountaineer: 'two men skilled in climbing mountains'. Jolly good, well you're in. Congratulations, both of you. Well, er, what are your names? + +00:02:52.000 --> 00:02:54.000 + +Arthur Wilson. + +00:02:54.000 --> 00:03:00.000 + +Arthur Wilson, right—I'll call you Arthur Wilson one, and you Arthur Wilson two, just to avoid confusion. + +00:03:00.000 --> 00:03:03.000 + +Are you actually leading this expedition sir? + +00:03:03.000 --> 00:03:05.500 + +Yes, we are leading this expedition to Africa. + +00:03:05.500 --> 00:03:08.500 + +And what routes will you both be taking? + +00:03:08.500 --> 00:03:22.000 + +Good questions... shall I? We'll be leaving on January 22nd and taking the following routes. (indicates a map clearly labelled Surrey) A23s through Purleys down... avoiding Leatherheads... A231s entering Rottingdeans from the North. From Rottingdeans we go through Africa to Nairobis... then ask. + +00:03:22.000 --> 00:03:24.500 + +Does anyone speak Swahili, sir? + +00:03:24.500 --> 00:03:26.500 + +Oh, yes I think most of them do down there. + +00:03:26.500 --> 00:03:29.500 + +Does anyone in our party speak Swahili sir? + +00:03:29.500 --> 00:03:32.000 + +Oh, well Matron's got a smattering. + +00:03:32.000 --> 00:03:34.500 + +Apart from the two Matrons ... + +00:03:34.500 --> 00:03:36.000 + +Good God, I'd forgotten about her. + +00:03:36.000 --> 00:03:39.000 + +Apart from them, who else is coming on the expedition, sir? + +00:03:39.000 --> 00:03:47.000 + +Well we've got the Arthur Brown twins, two botanists called Machin, the William Johnston brothers ... + +00:03:47.000 --> 00:03:48.800 + +Two of them? + +00:03:48.800 --> 00:03:57.000 + +No four of them, a pair of identical twins ... and a couple of the Ken Spinoza quads - the other two pulled out. And of course you two. + +00:03:57.000 --> 00:03:59.500 + +And none of these are mountaineers? + +00:03:59.500 --> 00:04:10.000 + +Well you two are, and we've got a brace of guides called Jimmy Blenkinsop... Kilimanjaro is a pretty tricky climb... but Jimmy's put his heads together and worked out a way up. (opens door) Jimmy? + +00:04:10.000 --> 00:04:28.000 + +(to Bob, reassuring) Don't worry about the er ... (puts hand over eye) We'll get him up somehow. Now the approach to Kilimanjaro is quite simply over the foothills, and then we go on after that to ... to set a base camp... when— + +00:04:28.000 --> 00:04:32.000 +[action] Jimmy clambers over every piece of furniture, causing wreckage; staggers out headlong. Loud crashing. + +00:04:32.000 --> 00:04:34.500 + +He'll be leading the first assault. + +00:04:34.500 --> 00:04:39.500 + +Well I'm afraid I shan't be coming on your expedition sir, as I've absolutely no confidence in anyone involved in it. + +00:04:39.500 --> 00:04:42.000 +[action] Bob gets up and walks out, slamming the door. + +00:04:42.000 --> 00:04:45.000 + +Oh dear. (pause; looks over at 'other' Bob) Well how about you? + +00:04:45.000 --> 00:04:47.500 + +(sitting at other angle of desk) Well I'm game, sir. + +00:04:47.500 --> 00:04:50.000 +[action] Cut to two sirs, double image, split screen. + +00:04:50.000 --> 00:04:51.500 + +So are we. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_09__The_ant,_an_introduction/4_A_man_with_a_tape_recorder_up_his_brother's_nose.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_09__The_ant,_an_introduction/4_A_man_with_a_tape_recorder_up_his_brother's_nose.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..ea60eb6d --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_09__The_ant,_an_introduction/4_A_man_with_a_tape_recorder_up_his_brother's_nose.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,17 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Skit anchor #4. + +00:04:51.500 --> 00:04:55.000 + +And now for something completely different - a man with a tape recorder up his brother's nose. + +00:04:55.000 --> 00:05:05.000 +[action] Michael on small stage with Graham. Michael puts a finger up Graham's nostril; 'La Marseillaise' plays. Switches nostril; rewinding noises. + +00:05:05.000 --> 00:05:07.500 +[caption] 'AND NOW IN STEREO...' + +00:05:07.500 --> 00:05:13.000 +[action] Michael simultaneously inserts a finger into his own nostril and Graham's; two out-of-sync 'Marseillaise' recordings play. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_09__The_ant,_an_introduction/5_Homicidal_barber.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_09__The_ant,_an_introduction/5_Homicidal_barber.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..572e7d84 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_09__The_ant,_an_introduction/5_Homicidal_barber.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,215 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Skit anchor #5. + +00:05:13.000 --> 00:05:20.000 +[action] Animated link to a suburban gents hairdressing salon. Customer enters; barber washes hands obsessively. + +00:05:20.000 --> 00:05:21.500 + +Morning. + +00:05:21.500 --> 00:05:25.500 + +(flinching) Ah ... good morning sir, good morning. I'll be with you in a minute. + +00:05:25.500 --> 00:05:35.000 +[action] Barber dries hands; bloodstains visible on coat, lapel torn. He throws sheet around customer; nearly strangles him, then controls himself. + +00:05:35.000 --> 00:05:37.500 + +How... how would you like it, sir? + +00:05:37.500 --> 00:05:40.000 + +Just short back and sides please. + +00:05:40.000 --> 00:05:41.800 + +How do you do that? + +00:05:41.800 --> 00:05:45.000 + +Well it's just... ordinary short back and sides. + +00:05:45.000 --> 00:05:54.000 + +It's not a ... razor cut? Razor, razor, cut, cut, blood, spurt, artery, murder... Oh thank God, thank God. It's just a scissors. + +00:05:54.000 --> 00:05:56.000 + +Yes... (laughs nervously) + +00:05:56.000 --> 00:05:59.000 + +You wouldn't rather just have it combed, would you sir? + +00:05:59.000 --> 00:06:00.800 + +I beg your pardon? + +00:06:00.800 --> 00:06:03.000 + +You wouldn't rather forget all about it? + +00:06:03.000 --> 00:06:05.000 + +No, no, no, I want it cut. + +00:06:05.000 --> 00:06:06.500 +[action] Barber winces at 'cut'. + +00:06:06.500 --> 00:06:15.000 + +Cut, cut, cut, blood, spurt, artery, murder, Hitchcock, Psycho... right sir ... well ... I'll just get everything ready. In the meanwhile perhaps you could fill in one of these. + +00:06:15.000 --> 00:06:18.000 + +All right, fine, yes. + +00:06:18.000 --> 00:06:23.000 +[action] Barber opens cupboard; inside door shows large medical chart: 'Main Arteries'. Shaking hand traces arteries. + +00:06:23.000 --> 00:06:24.500 + +Excuse me, er... + +00:06:24.500 --> 00:06:25.800 + +What? + +00:06:25.800 --> 00:06:29.000 + +Where it says: 'next of kin' shall I put 'mother'? + +00:06:29.000 --> 00:06:30.500 + +Yes, yes ... yes. + +00:06:30.500 --> 00:06:32.500 + +Right there we are. (hands form) + +00:06:32.500 --> 00:06:33.800 + +Thank you. + +00:06:33.800 --> 00:06:36.000 +[action] Barber readies scissors and comb; opens and shuts scissors behind customer. + +00:06:36.000 --> 00:06:37.000 + +Right! + +00:06:37.000 --> 00:06:42.000 +[action] He falters; takes a hard swig of whisky; returns behind customer. + +00:06:42.000 --> 00:06:44.000 + +Ha, ha, ha ... there, I've finished. + +00:06:44.000 --> 00:06:45.500 + +What? + +00:06:45.500 --> 00:06:49.000 + +I've finished cutting... cutting... cutting your hair. It's all done, + +00:06:49.000 --> 00:06:51.000 + +You haven't started cutting it! + +00:06:51.000 --> 00:06:55.500 + +I have! I did it very quickly... your honour... sir... sir... + +00:06:55.500 --> 00:07:01.000 + +(testy) Look here old fellow, I know when a chap's cut my hair and when he hasn't. Please stop fooling and get on with it. + +00:07:01.000 --> 00:07:06.000 +[action] Barber drags a tape recorder from the floor and places it behind the chair. + +00:07:06.000 --> 00:07:09.000 + +Yes, yes, I will, I'm going to cut your hair, sir. I'm going to start cutting your hair, sir, start cutting now! + +00:07:09.000 --> 00:07:12.000 +[action] He switches on the tape recorder and cowers against the wall, trembling. + +00:07:12.000 --> 00:07:13.800 + +Nice day, sir, + +00:07:13.800 --> 00:07:16.000 + +Yes, flowers could do with a drop of rain though, eh? + +00:07:16.000 --> 00:07:19.000 + +(snip, snip) Did you see the match last night, sir? + +00:07:19.000 --> 00:07:21.000 + +Yes. Good game. I thought. + +00:07:21.000 --> 00:07:24.000 + +(snip, snip, snip; electric razor starts) I thought Hurst played well sir. + +00:07:24.000 --> 00:07:26.000 + +(straining) I beg your pardon? + +00:07:26.000 --> 00:07:28.500 + +(razor stops) I thought Hurst played well. + +00:07:28.500 --> 00:07:31.000 + +Oh yes ... yes ... he was the only one who did though. + +00:07:31.000 --> 00:07:33.000 + +Can you put your head down a little, sir? + +00:07:33.000 --> 00:07:34.500 + +Sorry, sorry. (bows head) + +00:07:34.500 --> 00:07:38.000 + +I prefer to watch Palace nowadays. (electric razor starts) Oh! Sorry! Was that your ear? + +00:07:38.000 --> 00:07:40.000 + +No no ... I didn't feel a thing. + +00:07:40.000 --> 00:07:45.000 +[action] Customer rises, removes sheet, looks in mirror; turns and sees cowering barber. + +00:07:45.000 --> 00:07:46.800 + +Look, what's going on? + +00:07:46.800 --> 00:07:48.800 + +Yes, it's a nice spot, isn't it. + +00:07:48.800 --> 00:07:50.800 + +Look, I came here for a haircut! + +00:07:50.800 --> 00:07:53.000 + +(pathetically) It looks very nice sir. + +00:07:53.000 --> 00:07:55.500 + +(angrily) It's exactly the same as when I first came in. + +00:07:55.500 --> 00:07:57.000 + +Right, that's the lot then. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_09__The_ant,_an_introduction/6_Lumberjack_song.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_09__The_ant,_an_introduction/6_Lumberjack_song.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..f68775a1 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_09__The_ant,_an_introduction/6_Lumberjack_song.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,78 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Skit anchor #6. + +00:07:57.000 --> 00:08:19.000 + +All right ... I confess I haven't cut your hair ... I hate cutting hair. I have this terrible uncontrollable fear whenever I see hair... I wanted to be a lumberjack. Leaping from tree to tree... The giant redwood, the larch, the fir, the mighty Scots pine... The smell of fresh-cut timber! The crash of mighty trees! With my best girlie by my side... We'd sing ... sing ... sing. + +00:08:19.000 --> 00:08:22.000 +[action] Lights dim; choir of Mounties heard faintly. Girl rushes to his side, adoring. + +00:08:22.000 --> 00:08:26.000 + +(singing) I'm a lumberjack and I'm OK, I sleep all night and I work all day + +00:08:26.000 --> 00:08:30.000 + +He's a lumberjack, and he's OK, He sleeps all night and he works all day. + +00:08:30.000 --> 00:08:36.000 + +I cut down trees, I eat my lunch, I go to the lavatory. On Wednesdays I go shopping, And have buttered scones for tea. + +00:08:36.000 --> 00:08:43.000 + +He cuts down trees, He eats his lunch, He goes to the lavatory. On Wednesdays he goes shopping, And have buttered scones for tea. He's a lumberjack, and he's OK, He sleeps all night and he works all day. + +00:08:43.000 --> 00:08:49.000 + +I cut down trees, I skip and jump, I like to press wild flowers. I put on women's clothing, And hang around in bars. + +00:08:49.000 --> 00:08:55.000 + +He cuts down trees, he skips and jumps, He likes to press wild flowers. He puts on women's clothing And hangs around... In bars??????? + +00:08:55.000 --> 00:08:58.000 +[action] Choir looks uncomfortable, then brightens for chorus. + +00:08:58.000 --> 00:09:02.000 + +He's a lumberjack, and he's OK, He sleeps all night and he works all day. + +00:09:02.000 --> 00:09:08.000 + +I chop down trees, I wear high heels, Suspenders and a bra. I wish I'd been a girlie Just like my dear Mama. + +00:09:08.000 --> 00:09:13.000 + +He cuts down trees, he wears high heels (spoken) Suspenders and a .... a Bra???? + +00:09:13.000 --> 00:09:17.000 +[action] They mumble; music runs down. The girl looks horrified and bursts into tears. + +00:09:17.000 --> 00:09:18.500 + +...just like my dear Mama. + +00:09:18.500 --> 00:09:21.500 + +Oh Bevis! And I thought you were so rugged. + +00:09:21.500 --> 00:09:28.000 +[action] Cut to hand-written letter. + +00:09:28.000 --> 00:09:44.000 + +Dear Sir, I wish to complain in the strongest possible terms about the song which you have just broadcast, about the lumberjack who wears women's clothes. Many of my best friends are lumberjacks and only a few of them are transvestites. Yours faithfully, Brigadier Sir Charles Arthur Strong (Mrs.) PS I have never kissed the editor of the Radio Times. + +00:09:44.000 --> 00:09:49.000 +[action] Cut to pepperpot. + +00:09:49.000 --> 00:09:53.000 + +Well I object to all this sex on the television. I mean I keep falling off. + +00:09:53.000 --> 00:09:58.000 +[caption] SUPER: 'THAT JOKE WAS BRITAIN'S ENTRY FOR THIS YEAR'S RUBBER MAC OF ZURICH AWARD' ROLLER: 'IT CAME LAST' + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_09__The_ant,_an_introduction/7_Gumby_crooner.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_09__The_ant,_an_introduction/7_Gumby_crooner.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..bcd9cc4a --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_09__The_ant,_an_introduction/7_Gumby_crooner.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,14 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Skit anchor #7. + +00:09:58.000 --> 00:10:04.000 +[action] Back to Canadian backdrop. Man with knotted hanky, woolly pullover, and braces. + +00:10:04.000 --> 00:10:06.500 +[caption] 'PROF. R. J. GUMBY' + +00:10:06.500 --> 00:10:18.000 + +Well I think television's killed real entertainment. In the old days we used to make our own fun. At Christmas parties I used to strike myself on the head repeatedly with blunt instruments while crooning. (sings) 'Only make believe, I love you,' (hits head with bricks) 'Only make believe that you love me,' (hits himself) 'Others find peace of mind...' + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_09__The_ant,_an_introduction/8_The_refreshment_room_at_Bletchley.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_09__The_ant,_an_introduction/8_The_refreshment_room_at_Bletchley.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..9fd2182a --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_09__The_ant,_an_introduction/8_The_refreshment_room_at_Bletchley.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,41 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Skit anchor #8. + +00:10:18.000 --> 00:10:21.000 +[action] Cut to a swish nightclub. Compère enters. + +00:10:21.000 --> 00:10:42.000 + +Good evening, ladies and gentlemen, and welcome to the Refreshment Room here at Bletchley. (applause) My name is Kenny Lust and I'm your compère for tonight. You know, once in a while it is my pleasure, and my privilege, to welcome some of the truly great international artists of our time. (applause) And tonight we have one such artist. (grovelling) Ladies and gentlemen, someone whom I've always personally admired... (by now on his knees) ...I would rather be sealed in a pit of my own filth, than dare tread on the same stage with him. Ladies and gentlemen, the incomparably superior human being, Harry Fink! + +00:10:42.000 --> 00:10:43.500 + +He can't come! + +00:10:43.500 --> 00:10:48.000 + +Never mind, it's not all it's cracked up to be. Ladies and gentlemen, we give you Ken Buddha and his inflatable knees. + +00:10:48.000 --> 00:10:51.000 +[action] Ken Buddha in evening dress; his knees go 'bang'. + +00:10:51.000 --> 00:10:55.000 + +Ken Buddha, a smile, two bangs and a religion. Now ladies and gentlemen, for your further entertainment, Brian Islam and Brucie. + +00:10:55.000 --> 00:11:00.000 +[action] Two animated men dance to jug band music. Cut back to barber and customer. + +00:11:00.000 --> 00:11:02.500 + +So anyway, I became a barber. + +00:11:02.500 --> 00:11:04.500 + +(sympathetically) Poor chap. + +00:11:04.500 --> 00:11:13.000 + +Yes, pity really, I always preferred the outdoor life. Hunting, shooting, fishing. Getting out there with a gun, slaughtering a few of God's creatures - that was the life. Charging about the moorland, blasting their heads off. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_09__The_ant,_an_introduction/9_Hunting_film.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_09__The_ant,_an_introduction/9_Hunting_film.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..2f1ea783 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_09__The_ant,_an_introduction/9_Hunting_film.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,33 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Skit anchor #9. + +00:11:13.000 --> 00:11:20.000 +[action] Large country house. Sporting gentlemen in tweed with shotguns exit, firing casually; climb into Land-Rover and drive off. + +00:11:20.000 --> 00:11:34.000 +[action] In hunting country, line of beaters advances; young couples leap from undergrowth and flee. Various bungled shots: broken gun; shot into air; egg lands on shooter's head. + +00:11:34.000 --> 00:11:42.000 +[action] Two duellists fire; referee falls dead. Another hunter fires, falls backward; couple flees from behind him. + +00:11:42.000 --> 00:11:49.000 +[action] Hunter argues with parachutist who has just landed. Another fires into bushes; a Red Indian pops up and runs away. + +00:11:49.000 --> 00:11:56.000 +[action] They return to the house bandaged and in plaster; two carry a pole bearing a very small bird. + +00:11:56.000 --> 00:11:59.000 +[action] Freeze on exterior photo; reveal it is a photo on a stand. Knight in armour flexes raw chicken. + +00:11:59.000 --> 00:12:02.000 + +I'm sorry, we don't need you this week. + +00:12:02.000 --> 00:12:06.000 +[action] Knight droops and slinks off, still holding chicken; passes a hen house. + +00:12:06.000 --> 00:12:08.000 + +And now for something completely different. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_10_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/0_Episode10_head_tail.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_10_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/0_Episode10_head_tail.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..fe986689 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_10_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/0_Episode10_head_tail.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,23 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings; intro titles and end credits grouped. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:02.500 +[action] Boring old 'It's' man hangs from a meat-hook. + +00:00:02.500 --> 00:00:04.500 + +It's… + +00:00:04.500 --> 00:00:07.500 +[caption] 'MONTY PYTHON'S FLYING CIRCUS' + +00:00:07.500 --> 00:00:12.000 +[action] Animated titles as per usual. + +00:24:30.000 --> 00:24:34.000 +[action] Two men detach the 'It's' man from his meat-hook and carry him off. + +00:24:34.000 --> 00:24:40.000 +[caption] CREDITS + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_10_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/10_Letters_to_'Daily_Mirror'.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_10_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/10_Letters_to_'Daily_Mirror'.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..75b77a6b --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_10_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/10_Letters_to_'Daily_Mirror'.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,39 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings; angry letters montage at anchor #10. + +00:15:13.000 --> 00:15:15.000 +[action] Cut to angry letters being read. + +00:15:15.000 --> 00:15:20.000 + +(reads) Dear Mirror View, I would like to be paid five guineas for saying something stupid about a television show. Yours sincerely, Mrs Sybil Agro. + +00:15:20.000 --> 00:15:28.000 + +Dear David Jacobs, East Grinstead, Friday. Why should I have to pay sixty-four guineas each year for my television licence when I can buy one for six. Yours sincerely, Captain R. H. Pretty. PS Support Rhodesia, cut motor taxes, save the Argylls, running-in please pass. + +00:15:28.000 --> 00:15:34.000 + +Dear Old Codgers, some friends of mine and I have formed a consortium, and working with sophisticated drilling equipment, we have discovered extensive nickel deposits off Western Scotland. The Cincinnatti Mining Company. + +00:15:34.000 --> 00:15:35.500 + +Good for you, ma'am. + +00:15:35.500 --> 00:15:38.000 + +Dear Old Codgers, I am President of the United States of America, Yours truly, R. M. Nixon. + +00:15:38.000 --> 00:15:40.000 + +Phew! Bet that's a job and a half, ma'am. + +00:15:40.000 --> 00:15:44.000 + +Dear Sir, I am over three thousand years old and would like to see any scene with two people in bed. + +00:15:44.000 --> 00:15:45.500 + +Bet that's a link ma'am. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_10_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/11_Strangers_in_the_night.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_10_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/11_Strangers_in_the_night.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..f944e807 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_10_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/11_Strangers_in_the_night.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,286 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings; bedroom farce at anchor #11. + +00:15:45.500 --> 00:15:52.000 +[action] Dark bedroom; middle-aged couple asleep. Dapper Frenchman climbs in with beret and French loaf; kisses wife’s forehead. + +00:15:52.000 --> 00:15:56.000 + +Vera … Vera … darling! Wake up my little lemon. Come to my arms. + +00:15:56.000 --> 00:15:58.500 + +Maurice! What are you doing here? + +00:15:58.500 --> 00:16:02.000 + +I could not keep away from you. I must have you all the time. + +00:16:02.000 --> 00:16:03.500 + +Oh this is most inconvenient. + +00:16:03.500 --> 00:16:08.000 + +Don't talk to me about convenience, love consumes my naughty mind, I'm delirious with desire. + +00:16:08.000 --> 00:16:10.500 +[action] He kisses her hand repeatedly. Husband wakes, sits bolt upright, stares ahead. + +00:16:10.500 --> 00:16:12.500 + +What's that, Vera? + +00:16:12.500 --> 00:16:14.500 + +Oh nothing, dear. Just a trick of the light. + +00:16:14.500 --> 00:16:16.000 + +Righto. (sleeps again) + +00:16:16.000 --> 00:16:17.500 + +Phew! That was close. + +00:16:17.500 --> 00:16:22.000 + +Now then my little banana, my little fruit salad, I can wait for you no longer. You must be mine utterly… + +00:16:22.000 --> 00:16:23.500 + +Oh, Maurice! + +00:16:23.500 --> 00:16:26.500 +[action] A young public-school man appears with check suit and pipe. + +00:16:26.500 --> 00:16:28.000 + +Vera! How dare you! + +00:16:28.000 --> 00:16:29.000 + +Roger! + +00:16:29.000 --> 00:16:31.000 + +What's the meaning of this? + +00:16:31.000 --> 00:16:33.000 + +Oh I can explain everything, my darling! + +00:16:33.000 --> 00:16:34.500 + +Who is this? + +00:16:34.500 --> 00:16:39.000 + +This is Maurice Zatapathique … Roger Thompson … Roger Thompsnn … Maurice Zatapathique. + +00:16:39.000 --> 00:16:40.500 + +How do you do. + +00:16:40.500 --> 00:16:45.000 + +How do you do … (kneeling) How could you do this to me, Vera … after all we've been through? Dammit, I love you. + +00:16:45.000 --> 00:16:47.000 + +Vera! Don't you understand, it's me that loves you. + +00:16:47.000 --> 00:16:48.500 +[action] Husband wakes again. + +00:16:48.500 --> 00:16:50.000 + +What's happening, Vera? + +00:16:50.000 --> 00:16:52.000 + +Oh, nothing dear. Just a twig brushing against the window. + +00:16:52.000 --> 00:16:53.500 + +Righto. (sleeps) + +00:16:53.500 --> 00:16:55.000 + +Come to me Vera! + +00:16:55.000 --> 00:16:56.500 + +Oh … not now, Roger. + +00:16:56.500 --> 00:16:59.500 + +Vera, my little hedgehog! Don't turn me away! + +00:16:59.500 --> 00:17:01.000 + +Oh it cannot be, Maurice. + +00:17:01.000 --> 00:17:03.500 +[action] Enter Biggles, in WWI flying gear, wearing a 'Biggles' sign. + +00:17:03.500 --> 00:17:05.500 + +Hands off, you filthy bally froggie! (kneels by the bed) + +00:17:05.500 --> 00:17:06.800 + +Oh Ken, Ken Biggles! + +00:17:06.800 --> 00:17:08.500 + +Yes, Algy's here as well. + +00:17:08.500 --> 00:17:10.000 + +Algy Braithwaite? + +00:17:10.000 --> 00:17:13.500 +[action] Algy steps into light, tears streaming; wears sign: 'Algy's here as well.' + +00:17:13.500 --> 00:17:18.000 + +That's right… Vera … (chokes back tears) Oh God you know we both still bally love you. + +00:17:18.000 --> 00:17:20.500 + +Oh Biggles! Algy. Oh, but how wonderful! + +00:17:20.500 --> 00:17:22.500 +[action] She starts to cry. Husband wakes again. + +00:17:22.500 --> 00:17:24.000 + +What's happening, Vera? + +00:17:24.000 --> 00:17:26.000 + +Oh, er, nothing dear. It's just the toilet filling up. + +00:17:26.000 --> 00:17:27.500 + +Righto. (sleeps again) + +00:17:27.500 --> 00:17:33.000 +[action] The men pull up chairs around Vera; chatting. Biggles holds her hand. Maurice produces vin ordinaire. Four Mexican musicians appear by husband. + +00:17:33.000 --> 00:17:36.000 + +(reading from scruffy paper) Scusey… you tell me where is … Mrs Vera Jackson … please. + +00:17:36.000 --> 00:17:38.000 + +Yes … right and right again. + +00:17:38.000 --> 00:17:39.500 + +Muchas gracias… + +00:17:39.500 --> 00:17:40.500 + +Righto. + +00:17:40.500 --> 00:17:46.500 +[action] Mexicans troop around bed, join group; start a little conga with guitar, trumpet, maracas. Leader turns to Vera with a naughty glint. + +00:17:46.500 --> 00:17:49.000 + +Oh Vera … you remember Acapulco in the Springtime … + +00:17:49.000 --> 00:17:51.000 + +Oh. The Herman Rodrigues Four! + +00:17:51.000 --> 00:17:53.000 +[action] Husband wakes suddenly. + +00:17:53.000 --> 00:17:56.000 + +Vera! (immediate silence) I distinctly heard a Mexican rhythm combo. + +00:17:56.000 --> 00:17:58.500 + +Oh no, dear… it was just the electric blanket switching off. + +00:17:58.500 --> 00:18:00.500 + +Hm. Well I'm going for a tinkle. + +00:18:00.500 --> 00:18:02.500 +[action] He gets out of bed and disappears into the gloom. + +00:18:02.500 --> 00:18:05.500 + +Oh no you can't do that. Here, we haven't finished the sketch yet! + +00:18:05.500 --> 00:18:07.500 + +Dash it all, there's only another bally page. + +00:18:07.500 --> 00:18:09.500 + +I say. There's no one to react to. + +00:18:09.500 --> 00:18:11.000 + +Don't talk to the camera. + +00:18:11.000 --> 00:18:12.000 + +Oh sorry. + +00:18:12.000 --> 00:18:15.000 +[action] Enter huge man dressed as an Aztec god; as he is about to speak, Vera cuts him short due to lack of money. + +00:18:15.000 --> 00:18:17.000 + +Here it's no good you coming in … He's gone and left the sketch. + +00:18:17.000 --> 00:18:18.500 + +Yes, he went for a tinkle. + +00:18:18.500 --> 00:18:21.500 +[action] Close-up: husband with a dolly bird and lavatory chain between them; she is about to pull the chain; he stops her. + +00:18:21.500 --> 00:18:23.500 + +Sh! I think my wife is beginning to suspect something… + +00:18:23.500 --> 00:18:26.000 +[action] Cut to animation of strange creatures commenting on the ending. + +00:18:26.000 --> 00:18:28.000 + +I thought that ending was a bit predictable. + +00:18:28.000 --> 00:18:30.500 + +(eating it) Yes indeed there was a certain lack of originality. + +00:18:30.500 --> 00:18:33.500 + +(eating the crocodile) However it's not necessarily a good thing just to be different. + +00:18:33.500 --> 00:18:36.000 + +(emerging from hatch in ostrich) No, quite, there is equal humour in the conventional. + +00:18:36.000 --> 00:18:39.000 + +(eating ostrich) But on the other hand, is it what the public wants? I mean with the new permissiveness, not to mention the balance of payments. It's an undeniable fact that… + +00:18:39.000 --> 00:18:41.000 + +(eating the pig) I agree with that completely. + +00:18:41.000 --> 00:18:45.000 + +That's it… let's get out of this show before it's too late… ('The End' descends on it) Too late! + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_10_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/1_Walk-on_part_in_sketch.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_10_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/1_Walk-on_part_in_sketch.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..9a088857 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_10_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/1_Walk-on_part_in_sketch.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,114 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings; skit starts at anchor #1. + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:20.000 +[action] Lingerie shop set; assistant and robber wait, humming and checking watches. + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:24.000 +[action] Cut to letter on BBC stationery; grotty man reads at breakfast; wife busies herself. + +00:00:24.000 --> 00:00:25.500 + +Ooh. Ooh. + +00:00:25.500 --> 00:00:28.000 + +Oh, what is it dear? + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:31.500 + +It's from the BBC. They want to know if I want to be in a sketch on telly. + +00:00:31.500 --> 00:00:33.500 + +Oooh. That's nice. + +00:00:33.500 --> 00:00:35.500 + +What? It's acting innit? + +00:00:35.500 --> 00:00:36.800 + +Yes. + +00:00:36.800 --> 00:00:39.500 + +Well I'm a plumber. I can't act. + +00:00:39.500 --> 00:00:45.500 + +Oh, you never know till you try. Look at Mrs Brando's son next door. He was mending the fridge when they came and asked him to be the Wild One. What do they want you to do? + +00:00:45.500 --> 00:00:50.000 + +Well, they just want me to stand at a counter, and when the sketch starts I go out. + +00:00:50.000 --> 00:00:53.000 + +Oh, that sounds nice. It's what they call a walk-on. + +00:00:53.000 --> 00:00:56.000 + +Walk-on? That's a walk-off, that's what this is. + +00:00:56.000 --> 00:00:59.500 +[action] Cut to lingerie shop; assistant and robber still waiting. Floor manager walks on. + +00:00:59.500 --> 00:01:02.500 + +(quietly) Well, where is he, George? + +00:01:02.500 --> 00:01:05.500 + +I don't know, he should have been here hours ago. + +00:01:05.500 --> 00:01:07.500 + +He bloody should have been. + +00:01:07.500 --> 00:01:09.500 +[action] Cut back to grotty kitchen. + +00:01:09.500 --> 00:01:11.500 + +Well what else does it say? + +00:01:11.500 --> 00:01:17.500 + +It just says 'We would like you to be in a sketch. You are standing at a counter. When the sketch starts you go off. Yours faithfully, Lord Hill.' + +00:01:17.500 --> 00:01:19.500 + +Oh well, you'd better be off then. + +00:01:19.500 --> 00:01:21.500 + +Yeah, well, what about the cat? + +00:01:21.500 --> 00:01:28.500 + +Oh I'll look after the cat. Goodness me, Mrs Newman's eldest never worried about the cat when he went off to do 'The Sweet Bird of Youth'. + +00:01:28.500 --> 00:01:32.000 + +All right then, all right. Bye. Bye dear. + +00:01:32.000 --> 00:01:34.500 + +Bye bye, and mind you don't get seduced. + +00:01:34.500 --> 00:01:36.500 +[action] Man leaves; wife pauses, then… + +00:01:36.500 --> 00:01:41.000 + +Oh, it'll make a change from plumbing. Dad! Frank's got a television part. + +00:01:41.000 --> 00:01:47.000 +[action] She turns on the TV: assistant, robber, and floor manager wait in lingerie shop; a man is brought in, positioned, cued; the man walks out. + +00:01:47.000 --> 00:01:49.000 + +You missed him. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_10_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/2_Bank_robber_(lingerie_shop).vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_10_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/2_Bank_robber_(lingerie_shop).vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..11239577 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_10_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/2_Bank_robber_(lingerie_shop).vtt @@ -0,0 +1,59 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings; skit starts at anchor #2. + +00:01:49.000 --> 00:01:52.000 +[action] In shop: robber walks in and points gun at assistant. + +00:01:52.000 --> 00:01:57.000 + +Good morning, I am a bank robber. Er, please don't panic, just hand over all your money. + +00:01:57.000 --> 00:02:00.000 + +(politely) This is a lingerie shop, sir. + +00:02:00.000 --> 00:02:06.000 + +Fine, fine, fine. (slightly nonplussed) Adopt, adapt and improve. Motto of the round table. Well, um … what have you got? + +00:02:06.000 --> 00:02:12.000 + +(still politely) Er, we've got corsets, stockings, suspender belts, tights, bras, slips, petticoats, knickers, socks and garters, sir. + +00:02:12.000 --> 00:02:15.000 + +Fine, fine, fine, fine. No large piles of money in safes? + +00:02:15.000 --> 00:02:16.500 + +No, sir. + +00:02:16.500 --> 00:02:18.500 + +No deposit accounts? + +00:02:18.500 --> 00:02:20.000 + +No sir. + +00:02:20.000 --> 00:02:23.000 + +No piles of cash in easy to carry bags? + +00:02:23.000 --> 00:02:24.500 + +None at all sir. + +00:02:24.500 --> 00:02:26.500 + +No luncheon vouchers? + +00:02:26.500 --> 00:02:28.000 + +No, sir. + +00:02:28.000 --> 00:02:33.000 + +Fine, fine. Well, um… adopt, adapt and improve. Just a pair of knickers then please. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_10_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/3_Trailer.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_10_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/3_Trailer.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..dbab2b24 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_10_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/3_Trailer.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,14 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings; effeminate announcer David Unction at anchor #3. + +00:02:33.000 --> 00:02:36.000 +[action] Effeminate announcer sits at continuity desk. CAPTION card: 'David Unction'. + +00:02:36.000 --> 00:03:10.000 + +Well that was a bit of fun wasn't it. Ha, ha, ha. And a special good evening to you. Not just an ordinary good evening like you get from all the other announcers, but a special good evening from me (holds up card saying 'David Unction') to you. Well, what have we got next? This is fun isn't it. Look, I'm sorry if I'm interrupting anything that any of you may be doing at home, but I want you to think of me as an old queen. Friend, ha, ha, ha. Well, let's see what we've got next. In a few moments 'It's A Tree' and in the chair as usual is Arthur Tree, and starring in the show will be a host of star guests as his star guests. And then at 9.30 we've got another rollocking half hour of laughter-packed squalor with 'Yes it's the Sewage Farm Attendants'. And this week Dan falls into a vat of human dung with hilarious consequences. Ha, ha, ha. But now it's the glittering world of show business with Arthur Tree… + +00:03:10.000 --> 00:03:12.500 +[action] Music. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_10_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/4_Arthur_Tree.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_10_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/4_Arthur_Tree.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..c983e6fe --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_10_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/4_Arthur_Tree.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,58 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings; 'It's a Tree' show at anchor #4. + +00:03:12.500 --> 00:03:15.000 +[caption] 'IT'S A TREE' + +00:03:15.000 --> 00:03:20.000 +[action] Stock film: plane arriving at night, showbiz lights, premieres, audience applauding. Cut to studio: a tree in interview set; its mouth moves. + +00:03:20.000 --> 00:03:35.000 + +Hello. Hello people, and welcome to 'It's a Tree'. We have some really exiting guests for you this evening. A fabulous spruce, back from a tour of Holland, three gum trees making their first appearance in this country, scots pine and the conifers, and Elm Tree Bole - there you go, can't be bad - an exiting new American plank, a rainforest and a bucket of sawdust giving their views on teenage violence, and an unusual guest for this programme, a piece of laminated plastic. + +00:03:35.000 --> 00:03:37.000 +[action] Shot of piece of laminated plastic with mouth. + +00:03:37.000 --> 00:03:38.500 + +Hi there! + +00:03:38.500 --> 00:03:41.500 + +But first, will you please, please welcome - a block of wood. + +00:03:41.500 --> 00:03:46.000 +[action] Shot of large four-foot cube block with a mouth on chair next to Tree. Shot of forest with applause over. + +00:03:46.000 --> 00:03:48.500 + +Well, er, thanks Tree. I've got to pay the rent. + +00:03:48.500 --> 00:03:50.500 +[action] They laugh. Shot of forest laughing. + +00:03:50.500 --> 00:03:53.000 + +Ha, ha, ha, ha, super. Well, what have you been doing, Block? + +00:03:53.000 --> 00:04:05.000 + +Well I've just been starring in several major multi-million dollar international films, and, during breaks on the set, I've been designing a Cathedral, doing wonderful unpublicized work for charity, er, finishing my history of the world, of course, pulling the birds, er, photographing royalty on the loo, averting World War Three - can't be bad - and, er learning to read. + +00:04:05.000 --> 00:04:12.000 + +The full Renaissance bit, really…super, super. Well I've got to stop you there Block I'm afraid, because we've got someone who's been doing cabaret in the New Forest. From America, will you welcome please a Chippendale writing desk. + +00:04:12.000 --> 00:04:14.500 +[action] ANIMATION: a Chippendale desk. + +00:04:14.500 --> 00:04:30.000 + +Thank you Mr Tree. And I'd like to do a few impressions of some of my favourite Englishmen. First off. Long John Silver. (suitable animation) Augh, Jim boy. Augh. And now Edward Heath. Hello sailor. Now a short scene from a play by Harold Splinter. (a huge hammer smashes it) + +00:04:30.000 --> 00:04:37.000 + +Wasn't that just great, ladies and gentlemen, wait a minute we've got something else I just know you're going to love. (fanfares) Yes sir, coming right up - the Vocational Guidance Counsellor Sketch. (more fanfares) + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_10_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/5_Vocational_Guidance_Counsellor_(chartered_accountant).vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_10_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/5_Vocational_Guidance_Counsellor_(chartered_accountant).vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..abad4023 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_10_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/5_Vocational_Guidance_Counsellor_(chartered_accountant).vtt @@ -0,0 +1,252 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings; animation into office at anchor #5. + +00:04:37.000 --> 00:04:41.000 +[action] Animation film transitions into counsellor sketch. + +00:04:41.000 --> 00:04:46.000 +[caption] Voices singing: Vocational guidance counsellor … (repeating) + +00:04:46.000 --> 00:04:50.000 +[action] Office set. Counsellor at desk; Mr Anchovy waits. Counsellor checks watch, starts. + +00:04:50.000 --> 00:04:52.500 + +Ah Mr Anchovy. Do sit down. + +00:04:52.500 --> 00:04:55.000 + +Thank you. Take the weight off the feet, eh? + +00:04:55.000 --> 00:04:56.000 + +Yes, yes. + +00:04:56.000 --> 00:04:58.500 + +Lovely weather for the time of year, I must say. + +00:04:58.500 --> 00:05:02.500 + +Enough of this gay banter. And now Mr Anchovy, you asked us to advise you which job in life you were best suited for. + +00:05:02.500 --> 00:05:04.000 + +That is correct, yes. + +00:05:04.000 --> 00:05:12.000 + +Well I now have the results here of the interviews and the aptitude tests that you took last week, and from them we've built up a pretty clear picture of the sort of person that you are. And I think I can say, without fear of contradiction, that the ideal job for you is chartered accountancy. + +00:05:12.000 --> 00:05:14.500 + +But I am a chartered accountant. + +00:05:14.500 --> 00:05:16.500 + +Jolly good. Well back to the office with you then. + +00:05:16.500 --> 00:05:23.000 + +No! No! No! You don't understand. I've been a chartered accountant for the last twenty years. I want a new job. Something exciting that will let me live. + +00:05:23.000 --> 00:05:25.500 + +Well chartered accountancy is rather exciting isn't it? + +00:05:25.500 --> 00:05:32.000 + +Exciting? No it's not. It's dull. Dull. Dull. My God it's dull, it's so desperately dull and tedious and stuffy and boring and des-per-ate-ly DULL. + +00:05:32.000 --> 00:05:46.000 + +Well, er, yes Mr Anchovy, but you see your report here says that you are an extremely dull person. You see, our experts describe you as an appallingly dull fellow, unimaginative, timid, lacking in initiative, spineless, easily dominated, no sense of humour, tedious company and irrepressibly drab and awful. And whereas in most professions these would be considerable drawbacks, in chartered accountancy they are a positive boon. + +00:05:46.000 --> 00:05:51.000 + +But don't you see, I came here to find a new job, a new life, a new meaning to my existence. Can't you help me? + +00:05:51.000 --> 00:05:53.500 + +Well, do you have any idea of what you want to do? + +00:05:53.500 --> 00:05:55.000 + +Yes, yes I have. + +00:05:55.000 --> 00:05:56.000 + +What? + +00:05:56.000 --> 00:05:58.500 + +(boldly) Lion taming. + +00:05:58.500 --> 00:06:06.000 + +Well yes. Yes. Of course, it's a bit of a jump isn't it? I mean, er, chartered accountancy to lion taming in one go. You don't think it might be better if you worked your way towards lion taming, say, via banking? + +00:06:06.000 --> 00:06:10.000 + +No, no, no, no. No. I don't want to wait. At nine o'clock tomorrow I want to be in there, taming. + +00:06:10.000 --> 00:06:12.500 + +Fine, fine. But do you, do you have any qualifications? + +00:06:12.500 --> 00:06:14.000 + +Yes, I've got a hat. + +00:06:14.000 --> 00:06:15.000 + +A hat? + +00:06:15.000 --> 00:06:23.000 + +Yes, a hat. A lion taming hat. A hat with 'lion tamer' on it. I got it at Harrods. And it lights up saying 'lion tamer' in great big neon letters, so that you can tame them after dark when they're less stroppy. + +00:06:23.000 --> 00:06:24.000 + +I see, I see. + +00:06:24.000 --> 00:06:29.000 + +And you can switch it off during the day time, and claim reasonable wear and tear as allowable professional expenses under paragraph 335C… + +00:06:29.000 --> 00:06:40.000 + +Yes, yes, yes, I do follow, Mr Anchovy, but you see the snag is… if I now call Mr Chipperfield and say to him, 'look here, I've got a forty-five-year-old chartered accountant with me who wants to become a lion tamer', his first question is not going to be 'does he have his own hat?' He's going to ask what sort of experience you've had with lions. + +00:06:40.000 --> 00:06:42.500 + +Well I … I've seen them at the zoo. + +00:06:42.500 --> 00:06:44.000 + +Good, good, good. + +00:06:44.000 --> 00:06:48.000 + +Lively brown furry things with short stumpy legs and great long noses. I don't know what all the fuss is about, I could tame one of those. They look pretty tame to start with. + +00:06:48.000 --> 00:06:50.500 + +And these, er, these lions … how high are they? + +00:06:50.500 --> 00:06:53.000 + +(indicating a height of one foot) Well they're about so high, you know. They don't frighten me at all. + +00:06:53.000 --> 00:06:54.500 + +Really. And do these lions eat ants? + +00:06:54.500 --> 00:06:56.000 + +Yes, that's right. + +00:06:56.000 --> 00:06:59.000 + +Er, well, Mr Anchovy … I'm afraid what you've got hold of there is an anteater. + +00:06:59.000 --> 00:07:00.500 + +A what? + +00:07:00.500 --> 00:07:08.000 + +An anteater. Not a lion. You see a lion is a huge savage beast, about five feet high, ten feet long, weighing about four hundred pounds, running forty miles per hour, with masses of sharp pointed teeth and nasty long razor-sharp claws that can rip your belly open before you can say 'Eric Robinson', and they look like this. + +00:07:08.000 --> 00:07:11.000 +[action] Counsellor shows a large picture of a lion. Anchovy screams and passes out. + +00:07:11.000 --> 00:07:13.000 + +Time enough I think for a piece of wood. + +00:07:13.000 --> 00:07:15.000 +[caption] THE LARCH + +00:07:15.000 --> 00:07:16.500 + +The larch. + +00:07:16.500 --> 00:07:18.500 +[action] Back to office: Anchovy sits up with a start. + +00:07:18.500 --> 00:07:20.500 + +Now, shall I call Mr Chipperfield? + +00:07:20.500 --> 00:07:26.500 + +Er, no, no, no. I think your idea of making the transition to lion taming via easy stages, say via insurance… + +00:07:26.500 --> 00:07:27.500 + +Or banking. + +00:07:27.500 --> 00:07:33.000 + +Or banking, yes, yes, banking that's a man's life, isn't it? Banking, travel, excitement, adventure, thrills, decisions affecting people's lives. + +00:07:33.000 --> 00:07:35.000 + +Jolly good, well, er, shall I put you in touch with a bank? + +00:07:35.000 --> 00:07:36.000 + +Yes. + +00:07:36.000 --> 00:07:37.000 + +Fine. + +00:07:37.000 --> 00:07:44.000 + +Er… no, no, no. Look, er, it's a big decision, I'd like a couple of weeks to think about it… er… you know, don't want to jump into it too quickly. Maybe three weeks. I could let you know definitely then, I just don't want to make this definite decision. I'm er… + +00:07:44.000 --> 00:07:57.000 + +(turning to camera) Well this is just one of the all too many cases on our books of chartered accountancy. The only way that we can fight this terrible debilitating social disease, is by informing the general public of its consequences, by showing young people that it's just not worth it. So, so please… give generously… to this address: The League for Fighting Chartered Accountancy, 55 Lincoln House, Basil Street, London, SW3. + +00:07:57.000 --> 00:07:59.000 +[caption] The League for Fighting Chartered Accountancy, 55 Lincoln House, Basil Street, London, SW3. + +00:07:59.000 --> 00:08:03.000 +[action] Cut back to David Unction reading 'Physique' magazine; he hides it in a brown paper bag. + +00:08:03.000 --> 00:08:05.000 + +Oh, well that was fun wasn't it? + +00:08:05.000 --> 00:08:07.000 +[action] Cut to helmeted Viking. + +00:08:07.000 --> 00:08:09.000 + +No it wasn't, you fairy. + +00:08:09.000 --> 00:08:10.500 +[action] Back to Unction. + +00:08:10.500 --> 00:08:12.500 + +(sarcastically) Oh, hello sailor, + +00:08:12.500 --> 00:08:13.800 +[action] Cut to Viking. + +00:08:13.800 --> 00:08:17.500 + +Here, you wouldn't have got on one of our voyages - they were all dead butch. + +00:08:17.500 --> 00:08:18.800 +[action] Cut to Unction. + +00:08:18.800 --> 00:08:21.000 + +(camply) Oh that's not what I've heard. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_10_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/6_The_first_man_to_jump_the_Channel.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_10_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/6_The_first_man_to_jump_the_Channel.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..21739d69 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_10_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/6_The_first_man_to_jump_the_Channel.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,150 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings; Ron Obvious at anchor #6. + +00:08:21.000 --> 00:08:24.000 +[action] Cut to the sea. Pan to show Ron Obvious running along beach. + +00:08:24.000 --> 00:08:45.000 + +There is an epic quality about the sea which has throughout history stirred the hearts and minds of Englishmen of all nations. Sir Francis Drake, Captain Webb, Nelson of Trafalgar and Scott of the Antartic - all rose to the challenge of the mighty ocean. And today another Englishman may add his name to the golden roll of history: Mr Ron Obvious of Neaps End. For today, Ron Obvious hopes to be the first man to jump the Channel. + +00:08:45.000 --> 00:08:49.000 +[action] Ron reaches cheering supporters. Interviewer addresses him. + +00:08:49.000 --> 00:08:52.500 + +Ron, now let's just get this quite clear - you're intending to jump across the English Channel? + +00:08:52.500 --> 00:08:54.500 + +Oh yes, that is correct, yes. + +00:08:54.500 --> 00:08:56.500 + +And, er, just how far is that? + +00:08:56.500 --> 00:08:59.000 + +Oh, well it's twenty-six miles from here to Calais. + +00:08:59.000 --> 00:09:00.800 + +Er, that's to the beach at Calais? + +00:09:00.800 --> 00:09:05.000 + +Well, no, no, provided I get a good lift off and maybe a gust of breeze over the French coast, I shall be jumping into the centre of Calais itself. + +00:09:05.000 --> 00:09:07.500 +[action] Brief shot: Frenchmen with banner 'Fin de Cross-Channel jump'. + +00:09:07.500 --> 00:09:10.500 + +Ron are you using any special techniques to jump this great distance? + +00:09:10.500 --> 00:09:14.000 + +Oh no, no. I shall be using an ordinary two-footed jump, er, straight up in the air and across the Channel. + +00:09:14.000 --> 00:09:16.500 + +I see. Er, Ron, what is the furthest distance that you've jumped, er, so far? + +00:09:16.500 --> 00:09:20.500 + +Er, oh, eleven foot six inches at Motspur Park on July 22nd. Er, but I have done nearly twelve feet unofficially. + +00:09:20.500 --> 00:09:22.500 +[action] Ron makes training-type movements. + +00:09:22.500 --> 00:09:27.000 + +I see. Er, Ron, Ron, Ron, aren't you worried Ron, aren't you worried jumping twenty-six miles across the sea? + +00:09:27.000 --> 00:09:30.000 + +Oh, well no, no, no, no. It is in fact easier to jump over sea than over dry land. + +00:09:30.000 --> 00:09:31.500 + +Well how is that? + +00:09:31.500 --> 00:09:37.000 + +Er, well my manager explained it to me. You see if you're five miles out over the English Channel, with nothing but sea underneath you, er, there is a very great impetus to say in the air. + +00:09:37.000 --> 00:09:40.000 + +I see. Well, er, thank you very much Ron and the very best of luck. + +00:09:40.000 --> 00:09:41.800 + +Thank you. Thank you. + +00:09:41.800 --> 00:09:46.000 + +(to camera) The man behind Ron's cross-Channel jump is his manager Mr Luigi Vercotti. (turns) Mr Vercotti, er Mr Vercotti … Mr Vercotti… + +00:09:46.000 --> 00:09:50.000 + +What? (mumbles protestations of innocence) I don't know what you're talking about. + +00:09:50.000 --> 00:09:52.000 + +Er, no, we're from the BBC, Mr Vercotti. + +00:09:52.000 --> 00:09:53.500 + +Who? + +00:09:53.500 --> 00:09:54.800 + +The BBC. + +00:09:54.800 --> 00:09:58.000 + +Oh, oh. I see. I thought, I thought you were the er . .. I like the police a lot, I've got a lot of time for them. + +00:09:58.000 --> 00:10:01.000 + +Mr, er, Mr Vercotti, what is your chief task as Ron's manager? + +00:10:01.000 --> 00:10:03.500 + +Well my main task is, er, to fix a sponsor for the big jump. + +00:10:03.500 --> 00:10:05.500 + +And who is the sponsor? + +00:10:05.500 --> 00:10:10.000 + +The Chippenham Brick Company. Ah, they, er, pay all the bills, er, in return for which Ron will be carrying half a hundredweight of their bricks. + +00:10:10.000 --> 00:10:12.500 +[action] Passport officer checks Ron's passport. + +00:10:12.500 --> 00:10:22.000 + +I see. Well, er, it looks as if Ron is ready now. He's got the bricks. He's had his passport checked and he's all set to go. And he's off on the first ever cross-Channel jump. (Ron runs and jumps; lands four feet into the water) Will Ron be trying the cross-Channel jump again soon? + +00:10:22.000 --> 00:10:26.000 + +No. No. I'm taking him off the jumps. Er, because I've got something lined up for Ron next week that I think is very much more up his street. + +00:10:26.000 --> 00:10:27.500 + +Er, what's that? + +00:10:27.500 --> 00:10:30.000 + +Er, Ron is going to eat Chichester Cathedral. + +00:10:30.000 --> 00:10:32.500 +[action] Cut to Chichester Cathedral. Ron walks up, brushing his teeth. + +00:10:32.500 --> 00:10:37.500 + +Well, there he goes, Ron Obvious of Neaps End, in an attempt which could make him the first man ever to eat an entire Anglican Cathedral. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_10_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/7_Tunnelling_from_Godalming_to_Java.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_10_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/7_Tunnelling_from_Godalming_to_Java.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..e2632060 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_10_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/7_Tunnelling_from_Godalming_to_Java.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,110 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings; follows Ron Obvious sequence at anchor #7. + +00:10:37.500 --> 00:10:42.000 +[action] Ron bites buttress, screams, clutches mouth. Cut to countryside: map and banner 'Tunnelling to Java'. + +00:10:42.000 --> 00:10:48.000 + +Well, er, I think, David, this is something which Ron and myself are really keen on. Ron is going to tunnel from Godalming here to Java here. (indicates inaccurately on map) + +00:10:48.000 --> 00:10:49.500 + +Java. + +00:10:49.500 --> 00:10:52.000 + +Yeah, er, I, I personally think this is going to make Ron a household name overnight. + +00:10:52.000 --> 00:10:53.500 + +And how far has he got? + +00:10:53.500 --> 00:10:56.500 + +Er, well, he's quite far now, Dave, well on the way. Well on the way, yeah. + +00:10:56.500 --> 00:10:58.000 + +Well where is he exactly? + +00:10:58.000 --> 00:10:59.500 + +Yeah. + +00:10:59.500 --> 00:11:01.000 + +Where? + +00:11:01.000 --> 00:11:06.000 + +Oh, er, well, er, you know, it's difficult to say exactly. He's er, you know, in the area of er, Ron, how far have you got? + +00:11:06.000 --> 00:11:08.500 + +(emerging from hole) Oh about two foot six Mr Vercotti. + +00:11:08.500 --> 00:11:10.500 + +Yeah well keep digging lad, keep digging. + +00:11:10.500 --> 00:11:12.500 + +Mr Vercotti are you sure there isn't a spade? + +00:11:12.500 --> 00:11:14.500 +[action] Cut to railway track with interviewer and Vercotti. + +00:11:14.500 --> 00:11:19.000 + +Er, Mr Verccotti, what do you say to people who accuse you of exploiting Ron for your own purposes? + +00:11:19.000 --> 00:11:24.000 + +Well, it's totally untrue, David. Ever since I left Sicily I've been trying to do the best for Ron. I know what Ron wants to do, I believe in him and I'm just trying to create the opportunities for Ron to do the kind of things he wants to do. + +00:11:24.000 --> 00:11:25.500 + +And what's he going to do today? + +00:11:25.500 --> 00:11:28.500 + +He's going to split a railway carriage with his nose. (screams off) + +00:11:28.500 --> 00:11:31.500 +[action] Hillside; banner 'Running to Mercury'. + +00:11:31.500 --> 00:11:35.000 + +The only difficult bit for Ron is getting out of the Earth's atmosphere. Er, once he's in orbit he'll be able to run straight to Mercury. + +00:11:35.000 --> 00:11:39.500 +[action] Heavily bandaged Ron leaps off starting platform: freeze frame. Scream. + +00:11:39.500 --> 00:11:42.500 +[caption] Tombstone: 'Ron Obvious 1941-1969 - very talented'. Pull back to Vercotti. + +00:11:42.500 --> 00:11:48.000 + +I am now extremely hopeful that Ron will break the world record for remaining underground. He's a wonderful boy this, he's got this really enormous talent, this really huge talent. + +00:11:48.000 --> 00:11:51.000 +[action] Over graveyard and wind, two ladies' voices are heard. + +00:11:51.000 --> 00:11:53.500 + +Oh that was a bit sad, wasn't it? + +00:11:53.500 --> 00:11:54.800 + +Shh. It's satire. + +00:11:54.800 --> 00:11:56.800 + +No it isn't. This is zany madcap humour. + +00:11:56.800 --> 00:11:58.000 + +Oh is it? + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_10_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/8_Pet_conversions.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_10_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/8_Pet_conversions.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..72ed9481 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_10_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/8_Pet_conversions.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,121 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings; pet shop near Melton Mowbray at anchor #8. + +00:11:58.000 --> 00:12:01.000 +[caption] SUPER: 'A PET SHOP SOMEWHERE NEAR MELTON MOWBRAY'. + +00:12:01.000 --> 00:12:04.000 +[action] Man enters, approaches shopkeeper at counter. + +00:12:04.000 --> 00:12:06.500 + +Good morning, I'd like to buy a cat. + +00:12:06.500 --> 00:12:10.000 + +Certainly sir. I've got a lovely terrier. (indicates a box on the counter) + +00:12:10.000 --> 00:12:12.500 + +(glancing in box) No, I want a cat really. + +00:12:12.500 --> 00:12:15.500 + +(swaps box as if different) Oh yeah, how about that? + +00:12:15.500 --> 00:12:17.500 + +(looking in box) No, that's the terrier. + +00:12:17.500 --> 00:12:19.000 + +Well, it's as near as dammit. + +00:12:19.000 --> 00:12:21.500 + +Well what do you mean? I want a cat. + +00:12:21.500 --> 00:12:28.000 + +Listen, tell you what. I'll file its legs down a bit, take its snout out, stick a few wires through its cheeks. There you are, a lovely pussy cat. + +00:12:28.000 --> 00:12:29.500 + +Its not a proper cat. + +00:12:29.500 --> 00:12:31.000 + +What do you mean? + +00:12:31.000 --> 00:12:32.500 + +Well it wouldn't meow. + +00:12:32.500 --> 00:12:34.000 + +Well it would howl a bit. + +00:12:34.000 --> 00:12:36.500 + +No, no, no, no. Er, have you got a parrot? + +00:12:36.500 --> 00:12:44.000 + +No, I'm afraid not actually guv, we're fresh out of parrots. I'll tell you what though … I'll lop its back legs off, make good, strip the fur, stick a couple of wings on and staple on a beak of your own choice. (rattles small box) No problem. Lovely parrot. + +00:12:44.000 --> 00:12:45.500 + +How long would that take? + +00:12:45.500 --> 00:12:50.000 + +Oh, let me see … er, stripping the fur off, no legs … (calling) Harry … can you do a parrot job on this terrier straight away? + +00:12:50.000 --> 00:12:53.000 + +(off-screen) No, I'm still putting a tuck in the Airedale, and then I got the frogs to let out. + +00:12:53.000 --> 00:12:54.500 + +Friday? + +00:12:54.500 --> 00:12:57.000 + +No I need it for tomorrow. It's a present. + +00:12:57.000 --> 00:13:05.000 + +Oh dear, it's a long job. You see parrot conversion … Tell you what though, for free, terriers make lovely fish. I mean I could do that for you straight away. Legs off, fins on, stick a little pipe through the back of its neck so it can breathe, bit of gold paint, make good … + +00:13:05.000 --> 00:13:06.500 + +You'd need a very big tank. + +00:13:06.500 --> 00:13:08.000 + +It's a great conversation piece. + +00:13:08.000 --> 00:13:11.000 + +Yes, all right, all right … but, uh, only if I can watch. + +00:13:11.000 --> 00:13:12.500 +[action] Vox pops. + +00:13:12.500 --> 00:13:14.500 + +Oh, I thought that was a bit predictable. + +00:13:14.500 --> 00:13:16.000 + +It's been done before + +00:13:16.000 --> 00:13:18.000 + +Yeah, we did it for Caesar's Christmas Show. + +00:13:18.000 --> 00:13:20.000 + +No you didn't, you did Jack and the Beanstalk. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_10_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/9_Gorilla_librarian.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_10_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/9_Gorilla_librarian.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..9a8a831f --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_10_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/9_Gorilla_librarian.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,139 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings; interview room sequence at anchor #9. + +00:13:20.000 --> 00:13:24.000 +[action] Town hall interview room; chairman with vicar and lady. He tosses away Caesar picture as camera pulls. + +00:13:24.000 --> 00:13:25.500 + +Here what was that picture? + +00:13:25.500 --> 00:13:30.000 + +Ssh! Next! (a gorilla enters) Good morning - Mr Phipps? + +00:13:30.000 --> 00:13:31.500 + +That's right, yes. + +00:13:31.500 --> 00:13:33.000 + +Er, do take a seat. + +00:13:33.000 --> 00:13:34.500 + +Right sir. (sits) + +00:13:34.500 --> 00:13:38.500 + +Now could you tell us roughly why you want to become a librarian? + +00:13:38.500 --> 00:13:41.000 + +Er, well, I've had a certain amount of experience running a library at school. + +00:13:41.000 --> 00:13:42.500 + +Yes, yes. What sort of experience? + +00:13:42.500 --> 00:13:44.500 + +Er, well for a time I ran the Upper Science Library. + +00:13:44.500 --> 00:13:56.500 + +Yes, yes. Now Mr Phipps, you do realize that the post of librarian carries with it certain very important responsibilities. I mean, there's the selection of books, the record library, and the art gallery. Now it seems to me that your greatest disadvantage is your lack of professional experience … coupled with the fact that, uh, being a gorilla, you would tend to frighten people. + +00:13:56.500 --> 00:13:58.000 + +(aside) Is he a gorilla? + +00:13:58.000 --> 00:13:59.000 + +Yes he is. + +00:13:59.000 --> 00:14:01.500 + +Well why didn't it say on his form that he's a gorilla? + +00:14:01.500 --> 00:14:04.500 + +Well, you see applicants are not required to fill in their species. + +00:14:04.500 --> 00:14:05.800 + +What was that picture? + +00:14:05.800 --> 00:14:10.500 + +Sh! … Mr Phipps, what is your attitude toward censorship in a public library? + +00:14:10.500 --> 00:14:12.000 + +How do you mean, sir? + +00:14:12.000 --> 00:14:16.000 + +Well I mean for instance, would you for instance stock 'Last Exit to Brooklyn'… or … 'Groupie'? + +00:14:16.000 --> 00:14:17.500 + +Yes, I think so. + +00:14:17.500 --> 00:14:18.500 + +Good. + +00:14:18.500 --> 00:14:27.000 + +Yes, well, that seems to me to be very sensible Mr Phipps. I can't pretend that this library hasn't had its difficulties … Mr Robertson, your predecessor, an excellent librarian, savaged three people last week and had to be destroyed. + +00:14:27.000 --> 00:14:28.500 + +I'm sorry sir. + +00:14:28.500 --> 00:14:36.000 + +Oh, no, don't be sorry. You see, I don't believe that libraries should be drab places where people sit in silence, and that's been the main reason for our policy of employing wild animals as librarians. + +00:14:36.000 --> 00:14:40.000 + +And also, they're much more permissive. Pumas keep Hank Janson on open shelves… + +00:14:40.000 --> 00:14:55.000 + +Yes. Yes. Yes. (maniacal look) Yes, yes Mr Phipps. I love seeing the customers when they come in to complain about some book being damaged, and ask to see the chief librarian and then … you should see their faces when the proud beast leaps from his tiny office, snatches the book from their hands and sinks his fangs into their soft er … (collects himself) Mr Phipps … Kong! You can be our next librarian - you're proud, majestic and fierce enough … will you do it? + +00:14:55.000 --> 00:14:57.000 + +I … don't think I can sir. + +00:14:57.000 --> 00:14:58.500 + +Why not? + +00:14:58.500 --> 00:15:01.000 + +I.. I'm not really a gorilla. + +00:15:01.000 --> 00:15:02.000 + +Eh? + +00:15:02.000 --> 00:15:04.000 + +I'm a librarian in a skin. + +00:15:04.000 --> 00:15:05.500 + +Why this deception? + +00:15:05.500 --> 00:15:07.500 + +Well, they said it was the best way to get the job. + +00:15:07.500 --> 00:15:13.000 + +Get out, Mr Librarian Phipps, seeing as you're not a gorilla, but only dressed up as one, trying to deceive us in order to further your career … (gorilla leaves) Next. (a dog comes in) Ah. Mr Pattinson … Sit! + diff --git "a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_11_\342\200\224_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/0_Episode11_head_tail.vtt" "b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_11_\342\200\224_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/0_Episode11_head_tail.vtt" new file mode 100644 index 00000000..b454c6a4 --- /dev/null +++ "b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_11_\342\200\224_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/0_Episode11_head_tail.vtt" @@ -0,0 +1,26 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Intro titles and closing credits + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:03.000 +[action] Film: The Amazing World of The 'It's' Man + +00:00:03.000 --> 00:00:05.000 + +It's… + +00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:07.500 +[action] Animated titles. + +00:00:07.500 --> 00:00:11.000 +[caption] 'MONTY PYTHON'S FLYING CIRCUS' + +00:00:11.000 --> 00:00:16.000 +[caption] 'EPISODE TWO'S' | [caption] 'THE ROYAL PHILHARMONIC ORCHESTRA GOES TO THE BATCHROOM' + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:20.000 +[action] Cut to bathroom door outside. Man knocks on door. From inside: a burst of the Tchaikovsky piano concerto. + +00:24:00.000 --> 00:24:05.000 +[action] CREDITS + diff --git "a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_11_\342\200\224_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/10_Undertakers_film_(finale).vtt" "b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_11_\342\200\224_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/10_Undertakers_film_(finale).vtt" new file mode 100644 index 00000000..d0ab1a20 --- /dev/null +++ "b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_11_\342\200\224_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/10_Undertakers_film_(finale).vtt" @@ -0,0 +1,18 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit starts at anchor #10 + +00:17:41.000 --> 00:17:49.000 +[action] Vicar in a graveyard sprinkles dirt and gets mud thrown in his face. Vicar shoots a gun. Undertakers leave the graveyard, get into a hearse; as it drives off, the other side is painted with psychedelic flowers. + +00:17:49.000 --> 00:17:55.000 + +So I said if it happened again I'd get very angry and talk to Lord Hill and… + +00:17:55.000 --> 00:17:58.000 +[action] Cut to 'It's' man. + +00:17:58.000 --> 00:18:00.000 + +Tell Lord Hill. + diff --git "a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_11_\342\200\224_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/1_Letter_(lavatorial_humour).vtt" "b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_11_\342\200\224_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/1_Letter_(lavatorial_humour).vtt" new file mode 100644 index 00000000..d63bec72 --- /dev/null +++ "b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_11_\342\200\224_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/1_Letter_(lavatorial_humour).vtt" @@ -0,0 +1,32 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit starts at anchor #1 + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:22.500 + +Have you finished in there yet? + +00:00:22.500 --> 00:00:26.000 +[action] From inside comes a burst of the Tchaikovsky piano concerto. He tuts. Cut to letter. + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:36.000 + +Dear Sir, I object strongly to the obvious lavatorial turn this show has already taken. Why do we never hear about the good things in Britain, like Mary Bignall's wonderful jump in 1964? Yours etc., Ken Voyeur. + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:40.000 +[action] Stock film of Mary Bignall's winning jump at the Rome Olympics. Cut to letter. + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:49.000 + +Dear Sir, I object strongly to the obvious athletic turn this show has now taken. Why can't we hear more about the human body? There is nothing embarrassing or nasty about the human body except for the intestines and bits of the bottom. + +00:00:49.000 --> 00:00:52.000 +[action] Another letter appears. + +00:00:52.000 --> 00:01:00.000 + +Dear Sir, I object strongly to the letters on your programme. They are clearly not written by the general public and are merely included for a cheap laugh. Yours sincerely etc., William Knickers. + +00:01:00.000 --> 00:01:06.000 +[action] Stock film: orchestra finishes an item. When they stop playing we hear the sound of flushing. + diff --git "a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_11_\342\200\224_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/2_Interruptions.vtt" "b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_11_\342\200\224_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/2_Interruptions.vtt" new file mode 100644 index 00000000..38b4c9d1 --- /dev/null +++ "b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_11_\342\200\224_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/2_Interruptions.vtt" @@ -0,0 +1,38 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit starts at anchor #2 + +00:01:06.000 --> 00:01:12.000 +[action] ANIMATION: A beautiful, not-zany introduction with photos of famous historical characters, ending with the words: 'The World of History'. CAPTION: 'PROFESSOR R. J. CANNING'. + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:15.000 + +1348. The Black Death, typhus, cholera, consumption, bubonic plague. + +00:01:15.000 --> 00:01:20.000 +[action] Cut to five undertakers sitting on a coffin in a country road. + +00:01:20.000 --> 00:01:22.500 + +Ah, those were the days… + +00:01:22.500 --> 00:01:24.500 +[action] Back to Canning at his desk. + +00:01:24.500 --> 00:01:34.000 + +Now I'm… I'm… Now I'm not prepared to go on with this, unless these interruptions cease. All right? Right. The devastating effect of these, em… + +00:01:34.000 --> 00:01:40.000 +[action] Film of hearses racing, crashing out of shot. Sign: 'Accident Black Spot', and the undertakers picnicking. + +00:01:40.000 --> 00:01:49.000 +[action] He packs up papers, puts on mac, walks away as camera pans and zooms.] No, don't follow me and… And don't zoom in on me, no I'm off, I'm off. That's it. That's all. I'm off. + +00:01:49.000 --> 00:01:53.000 +[action] He walks out. Empty frame. A short pause. An undertaker steps into frame. + +00:01:53.000 --> 00:01:59.000 + +[to camera] Are you nervy, irritable, depressed, tired of life. [winks] Keep it up. + diff --git "a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_11_\342\200\224_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/3_Agatha_Christie_sketch.vtt" "b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_11_\342\200\224_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/3_Agatha_Christie_sketch.vtt" new file mode 100644 index 00000000..4e218b84 --- /dev/null +++ "b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_11_\342\200\224_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/3_Agatha_Christie_sketch.vtt" @@ -0,0 +1,156 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit starts at anchor #3 + +00:01:59.000 --> 00:02:06.000 +[action] Drawing room of a large English country house. Thunder outside. Inspector Tiger enters. + +00:02:06.000 --> 00:02:34.000 + +This house is surrounded. I'm afraid I must not ask anyone to leave the room. No, I must ask nobody … no, I must ask everybody to… I must not ask anyone to leave the room. No one must be asked by me to leave the room. No, no one must ask the room to leave. I … I … ask the room shall by someone be left. Not. Ask nobody the room somebody leave shall I. Shall I leave the room? Everyone must leave the room… as it is… with them in it. Phew. Understand? + +00:02:34.000 --> 00:02:38.000 + +You don't want anybody to leave the room. + +00:02:38.000 --> 00:02:56.000 + +[clicks fingers] Now, alduce me to introlow myslef. I'm sorry. Alself me to myduce introlow myslef. Introme-to-lose mlow alself. Alme to you introself mylowduce. Excuse me a moment. [bangs head] Allow me to introduce myself. I'm afraid I must ask that no one leave the room. Allow me to introduce myself. I'm Inspector Tiger. + +00:02:56.000 --> 00:02:58.000 + +Tiger? + +00:02:58.000 --> 00:03:10.000 + +[jumping] Where? Where? What? Ah. Me Tiger. You Jane. Grrr. Beg your pardon, allow me to introduce myself I'm afraid I must ask that no one leave the room. + +00:03:10.000 --> 00:03:12.500 + +Why not? + +00:03:12.500 --> 00:03:18.500 + +Elementary. Since the body was found in this room, and no one has left it. Therefore … the murderer must be somebody in this room. + +00:03:18.500 --> 00:03:21.500 + +What body? + +00:03:21.500 --> 00:03:43.000 + +Somebody. In this room. Must the murderer be. The murderer of the body is somebody in this room, which nobody must leave… leave the body in the room not to be left by anybody. Nobody leaves anybody or the body with somebody. Everybody who is anybody shall leave the body in the room body. Take the tablets Tiger. Anybody [searching for tablets] with a body but not the body is nobody. Nobody leaves the body in the … [takes tablet] Albody me introbody albodyduce. + +00:03:43.000 --> 00:03:52.000 +[action] Surgeon enters with two nurses and operates on Tiger's head. CAPTION: 'THE SAME DRAWING ROOM. ONE LOBOTOMY LATER'. Surgeon packs up; Tiger's head bandaged. + +00:03:52.000 --> 00:03:54.000 + +Now for Sir Gerald. + +00:03:54.000 --> 00:04:03.000 + +That's better, now I'm Inspector Tiger and I must ask that nobody leave the room. [thumbs up to surgeon] Now someone has committed a murder here, and that murderer is someone in this room. The question is … who? + +00:04:03.000 --> 00:04:05.500 + +Look, there hasn't been a murder. + +00:04:05.500 --> 00:04:07.000 + +No murder. + +00:04:07.000 --> 00:04:08.500 + +No. + +00:04:08.500 --> 00:04:16.000 + +Oh. I don't like it. It's too simple, too clear cut. I'd better wait. [sits] No, too simple, too clear cut. + +00:04:16.000 --> 00:04:22.000 +[action] Lights go out. A scream then a shot. Lights up: Inspector Tiger dead with bullet hole, arrow through neck, and a bottle marked poison on his lap. + +00:04:22.000 --> 00:04:24.500 + +By jove, he was right. + +00:04:24.500 --> 00:04:28.500 +[action] Chief Superintendent Lookout enters with constable. + +00:04:28.500 --> 00:04:33.000 + +This house is surrounded. I must ask that no one leave the room. I'm Chief Superintendent Lookout. + +00:04:33.000 --> 00:04:34.500 + +Look out? + +00:04:34.500 --> 00:04:37.500 + +[jumping] What, where, oh, me, Lookout. Lookout of the Yard. + +00:04:37.500 --> 00:04:39.500 + +Why, what would we see? + +00:04:39.500 --> 00:04:41.000 + +I'm sorry? + +00:04:41.000 --> 00:04:44.500 + +What would we see if we look out of the yard? + +00:04:44.500 --> 00:05:09.000 + +... I'm afraid I don't follow that at all. Ah ha. The body. So the murderer must be somebody in this room. Unless he had very long arms. Say thirty or forty feet. I think we can discount that one. Ha, ha, ha, [starts really laughing] Lookout of the Yard. Very good. Right. Now, we'll reconstruct the crime. I'll sit down here. Constable, you turn off the lights. [lights go out, his voice continues] Good. Now then, there was a scream [scream] then just before the lights went up there was a shot. + +00:05:09.000 --> 00:05:15.000 +[action] A shot. Lights up: Lookout dead with bullet hole and arrow. Assistant Chief Constable Theresamanbehindyer walks in. + +00:05:15.000 --> 00:05:22.000 + +All right… all right, the house is surrounded and nobody leave the room and all the rest of it. Allow me to introduce myself. I'm Assistant Chief Constable Theresamanbehindyer. + +00:05:22.000 --> 00:05:23.500 + +Theresamanbehindyer? + +00:05:23.500 --> 00:05:29.000 + +Ah, you're not going to catch me with an old one like that. Right let's reconstruct the crime. Constable you be Inspector Tiger. + +00:05:29.000 --> 00:05:38.000 + +Right, sir. Nobody leave the room ask shall - somebody I leave nobody in the room body shall, take the tablets Tigerbody. Alself me to my duce introlow left body in the roomself. + +00:05:38.000 --> 00:05:47.000 + +Very good. Just sit down there. Right now we'll pretend the lights have gone out. Constable, you scream. [constable screams] Somebody shoots you [shoots constable through head] and the door opens… + +00:05:47.000 --> 00:05:52.000 +[action] The door flies open. Enter policeman. + +00:05:52.000 --> 00:05:55.000 + +Nobody move! I'm Chief Constable Fire. + +00:05:55.000 --> 00:05:57.000 + +Fire! Where? + +00:05:57.000 --> 00:06:02.000 +[action] He jumps. Cut to undertaker. + +00:06:02.000 --> 00:06:08.000 + +We're interrupting this sketch but we'll be bringing you back the moment anything interesting happens. Meanwhile here are some friends of mine. + +00:06:08.000 --> 00:06:15.000 +[action] Film: four undertakers carry a coffin, surreptitiously tip the body out, and skip up the road. + +00:06:15.000 --> 00:06:20.000 + +Dear Sir, I'm sorry this letter is late, it should have come at the beginning of the programme. Yours, Ivor Bigbottie, (age two). + diff --git "a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_11_\342\200\224_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/4_Literary_football_discussion.vtt" "b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_11_\342\200\224_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/4_Literary_football_discussion.vtt" new file mode 100644 index 00000000..a638f889 --- /dev/null +++ "b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_11_\342\200\224_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/4_Literary_football_discussion.vtt" @@ -0,0 +1,79 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit starts at anchor #4 + +00:06:20.000 --> 00:06:24.000 +[action] Two chairs in interview set. Interviewer and blazer-wearing footballer. + +00:06:24.000 --> 00:07:05.000 + +From the plastic arts we turn to football. Last night in the Stadium of Light, Jarrow, we witnessed the resuscitation of a great footballing tradition, when Jarrow United came of age, in a European sense, with an almost Proustian display of modern existentialist football. Virtually annihilating by midfield moral argument the now surely obsolescent catennachio defensive philosophy of Signor Alberto Fanffino. Bologna indeed were a side intellectually out argued by a Jarrow team thrusting and bursting with aggressive Kantian positivism and outstanding in this fine Jarrow team was my man of the match, the arch-thinker, free scheming, scarcely ever to be curbed, midfield cognoscento, Jimmy Buzzard. + +00:07:05.000 --> 00:07:07.500 + +Good evening Brian. + +00:07:07.500 --> 00:07:16.000 + +Jimmy, at least one ageing football commentator was gladdened last night by the sight of an English footballer breaking free of the limpid tentacles of packed Mediterranean defence. + +00:07:16.000 --> 00:07:18.500 + +Good evening Brian. + +00:07:18.500 --> 00:07:23.000 + +Were you surprised at the way the Italians ceded midfield dominance so early on in the game? + +00:07:23.000 --> 00:07:28.000 + +Well Brian… I'm opening a boutique. + +00:07:28.000 --> 00:07:35.000 + +This is of course symptomatic of a new breed of footballer as it is indeed symptomatic of your whole genre of player, is it not? + +00:07:35.000 --> 00:07:37.000 + +Good evening Brian. + +00:07:37.000 --> 00:07:44.000 + +What I'm getting at, Jimmy, is you seem to have discovered a new concept with a mode in which you dissected the Italian defence, last night. + +00:07:44.000 --> 00:07:51.000 + +[pauses for thought] I hit the ball first time and there it was in the back of the net. [smiles and looks around] + +00:07:51.000 --> 00:07:56.000 + +Do you think Jarrow will adopt a more defensive posture for the first leg of the next tie in Turkey? + +00:07:56.000 --> 00:07:59.500 + +[confidently] I hit the ball first time and there it was in the back of the net. + +00:07:59.500 --> 00:08:05.000 + +Yes, yes - but have you any plans for dealing with the free-scoring Turkish forwards? + +00:08:05.000 --> 00:08:09.000 + +Well Brian… I'm opening a boutique. + +00:08:09.000 --> 00:08:12.000 +[action] Cut to undertaker. + +00:08:12.000 --> 00:08:16.000 + +And now let's take a look at the state of play in the detective sketch. + +00:08:16.000 --> 00:08:22.000 +[action] Drawing room piled with dead policemen from earlier. A constable drones: 'Alself me to introlow mybody…' Inspector shoots him. CAPTION: 'CONSTABLES 13 SUPERINTENDENTS 9'. + +00:08:22.000 --> 00:08:30.000 +[action] Four undertakers carry a coffin up a hill; one drops. They swap him into the coffin and continue. + +00:08:30.000 --> 00:08:36.000 +[caption] 'Interesting People' flashing lights. A compère sits at a desk with guest chairs. + diff --git "a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_11_\342\200\224_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/5_Interesting_people.vtt" "b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_11_\342\200\224_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/5_Interesting_people.vtt" new file mode 100644 index 00000000..bfd49567 --- /dev/null +++ "b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_11_\342\200\224_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/5_Interesting_people.vtt" @@ -0,0 +1,274 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit starts at anchor #5 + +00:08:36.000 --> 00:08:47.000 + +Hello, good evening, and welcome to yet another edition of 'Interesting People'. And my first interesting person tonight is the highly interesting Mr Howard Stools from Kendal in Westmorland. + +00:08:47.000 --> 00:08:53.000 +[action] He puts a matchbox on the desk. Presses a button: applause. Releases: applause stops. Opens the box a little and speaks into it. + +00:08:53.000 --> 00:08:55.500 + +Good evening Mr Stools. + +00:08:55.500 --> 00:08:57.000 + +[from inside box] Hello, David. + +00:08:57.000 --> 00:09:00.000 + +Mr Stools, what makes you particularly interesting? + +00:09:00.000 --> 00:09:02.500 + +Well, I'm only half an inch long. + +00:09:02.500 --> 00:09:07.000 + +Well that's extremely interesting, thank you for coming along on the show tonight Mr Stools. + +00:09:07.000 --> 00:09:09.500 + +I thought you'd think that was interesting David, in fact… + +00:09:09.500 --> 00:09:14.000 + +[shuts matchbox; applause] Mr Howard Stools from Kendal in Westmorland … half an inch long. [applause] Our next guest tonight has come all the way from Egypt, he's just flown into London today, he's Mr Ali Bayan, he's with us in the studio tonight and he's stark raving mad. + +00:09:14.000 --> 00:09:17.000 +[action] Applause. Cut to Ali Bayan, who looks at camera in a very mad way. Applause. + +00:09:17.000 --> 00:09:24.000 + +Mr Ali Bayan, stark raving mad. Now it's time for our music spot and we turn the spotlight tonight on the Rachel Toovey Bicycle Choir, [applause] with their fantastic arrangement of 'Men of Harlech' for bicycle bells only. + +00:09:24.000 --> 00:09:31.000 +[action] Six men in oilskins and sou'westers sing 'Men of Harlech', ringing bells mournfully at the end of each line. Applause. + +00:09:31.000 --> 00:09:40.000 + +The Rachel Toovey Bicycle Choir. Really interesting. Remember, if you're interesting and want to appear on this programme, write your name and address and your telephone number and send it to this address: [reads caption] The BBC, c/o E. F. Lutt, 18 Rupee Buildings, West 12. [applause] Thank you, thank you. Now here's an interesting person. Apart from being a full-time stapling machine, he can also give a cat influenza. + +00:09:40.000 --> 00:09:44.000 +[action] A smart dressed man coughs into a cat basket. We hear a meow and a feline sneeze. + +00:09:44.000 --> 00:09:52.000 + +Well, you can't get much more interesting than that, or can you? With me now is Mr Thomas Walters of West Hartlepool who is totally invisible. Good evening, Mr Walters. [turns to empty chair] + +00:09:52.000 --> 00:09:54.000 + +[off-screen] Over here, Hughie. + +00:09:54.000 --> 00:09:57.000 +[action] A boringly dressed man is now sitting beside him. + +00:09:57.000 --> 00:09:59.500 + +Mr Walters, are you sure you're invisible? + +00:09:59.500 --> 00:10:01.500 + +Oh yes, most certainly. + +00:10:01.500 --> 00:10:04.500 + +Well, Mr Walters, what's it like being invisible? + +00:10:04.500 --> 00:10:17.000 + +[slowly, boringly] Well, for a start, at the office where I work I can be sitting at my desk all day and the others totally ignore me. At home, even though we are in the same room, my wife does not speak to me for hours, people pass me by in the street without a glance in my direction, and I can walk into a room without… + +00:10:17.000 --> 00:10:20.000 + +Well, whilst we've got interesting people, we met Mr Oliver Cavendish who… + +00:10:20.000 --> 00:10:24.000 + +[droning on] … Even now you yourself, you do hardly notice me… + +00:10:24.000 --> 00:10:36.000 + +Mr Oliver Cavendish of Leicester, who claims to be able to recite the entire Bible in one second, whilst being struck on the head with a large axe. Ha, ha, wow. We've since discovered that he was a fraud, yes a fraud, he did not in fact recite the entire Bible he merely recited the first two words, 'In the…' before his death. + +00:10:36.000 --> 00:10:41.000 +[action] Film montage of sporting clips. + +00:10:41.000 --> 00:10:46.000 + +[voice over] Now it's time for 'Interesting Sport', and this week it's all-in cricket, live from the Municipal Baths, Croydon. + +00:10:46.000 --> 00:10:51.000 +[action] Boxing ring: two fully kitted cricketers approach and start hitting each other with bats. Applause. + +00:10:51.000 --> 00:10:56.000 + +With me now is Mr Ken Dove, twice voted the most interesting man in Dorking. Ken, I believe you're interested in shouting. + +00:10:56.000 --> 00:11:02.000 + +[shouting] Yes, I'm interested in shouting all right, by jove you certainly hit the nail on the head with that particular observation of yours then. + +00:11:02.000 --> 00:11:04.500 + +What does your wife think of this? + +00:11:04.500 --> 00:11:06.500 + +[voice off, full-blooded] I agree with him. + +00:11:06.500 --> 00:11:08.000 + +Shut up! + +00:11:08.000 --> 00:11:13.000 + +… At parties for instance people never come up to me, I just sit there and everybody totally… + +00:11:13.000 --> 00:11:15.000 +[action] Man holding a cat enters. + +00:11:15.000 --> 00:11:17.000 + +That is Tiddles, I believe? + +00:11:17.000 --> 00:11:19.000 + +Yes, this is, this is Tiddles. + +00:11:19.000 --> 00:11:21.000 + +Yes, and what does she do? + +00:11:21.000 --> 00:11:23.000 + +She flies across the studio and lands in a bucket of water. + +00:11:23.000 --> 00:11:24.500 + +By herself? + +00:11:24.500 --> 00:11:26.000 + +No, I fling her. + +00:11:26.000 --> 00:11:30.000 + +Well that's extremely interesting, Ladies and gentlemen - Mr Don Savage and Tiddles. + +00:11:30.000 --> 00:11:35.000 +[action] Man whirls cat and flings it. A hollow splash and a meow. Quick shot of a real cat in a bucket. + +00:11:35.000 --> 00:11:38.000 + +[shouting] I'm more interesting than a wet pussycat. + +00:11:38.000 --> 00:11:41.000 + +… for hour after hour… + +00:11:41.000 --> 00:11:45.000 + +Yes, great, well now for the first time on television 'Interesting People' brings you a man who claims he can send bricks to sleep by hypnosis. Mr Keith Maniac from Guatemala. + +00:11:45.000 --> 00:11:47.000 +[action] Maniac sits by compère, wearing top hat and opera cloak. + +00:11:47.000 --> 00:11:48.500 + +Good evening. + +00:11:48.500 --> 00:11:51.000 + +Keith, you claim you can send bricks to sleep. + +00:11:51.000 --> 00:11:53.500 + +Yes, that is correct, I can… + +00:11:53.500 --> 00:11:55.000 + +Entirely by hypnosis. + +00:11:55.000 --> 00:12:00.000 + +Yes … I use no artificial means, whatsoever. [opens matchbox to light pipe; strikes match] + +00:12:00.000 --> 00:12:01.500 + +[from matchbox] Aaagh! + +00:12:01.500 --> 00:12:03.500 + +You've injured Mr Stools! + +00:12:03.500 --> 00:12:07.000 + +[picks up other box and lights pipe] I simply stare at the brick and it goes to sleep. + +00:12:07.000 --> 00:12:11.000 + +Well, we have a brick here, Keith. [indicates brick] Perhaps you can send it to sleep for us… + +00:12:11.000 --> 00:12:13.500 + +Oh … Ah, well, I am afraid that is already asleep. + +00:12:13.500 --> 00:12:15.500 + +How do you know? + +00:12:15.500 --> 00:12:17.500 + +Well, it's not moving …. + +00:12:17.500 --> 00:12:21.000 + +Oh, I see - have we got a moving brick? Yes, we've got a moving brick, Keith, it's coming over now. + +00:12:21.000 --> 00:12:25.000 +[action] A man in a white coat gently throws a brick; it lands on the desk as Keith stares at it. + +00:12:25.000 --> 00:12:27.000 + +There we are, fast asleep. + +00:12:27.000 --> 00:12:29.000 + +Very good, very good indeed. + +00:12:29.000 --> 00:12:31.000 + +All done with the eyes. + +00:12:31.000 --> 00:12:33.000 + +Yes, Mr Keith Maniac from Guatemala. + +00:12:33.000 --> 00:12:37.000 + +[distressed, to matchbox] Mr Stools - speak to me, Howard. + +00:12:37.000 --> 00:12:40.000 +[action] Quick cut back to all-in cricket. + +00:12:40.000 --> 00:12:44.000 + +Mr Keith Maniac of Guatemala… and now four tired undertakers. + +00:12:44.000 --> 00:12:54.000 +[action] Film: four undertakers struggle up a hill with a coffin. One collapses; they place him inside. Repeat until one remains, who finally climbs in. The coffin moves off by itself. + +00:12:54.000 --> 00:12:58.000 + +We interrupt this very quickly to take you back to the Jimmy Buzzard interview, where we understand something exciting's just happened. + +00:12:58.000 --> 00:13:01.000 +[action] Cut back to interview: Jimmy sits on the floor. + +00:13:01.000 --> 00:13:03.500 + +I've fallen off my chair, Brian. + diff --git "a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_11_\342\200\224_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/6_Undertakers_film_(graveyard_and_animation).vtt" "b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_11_\342\200\224_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/6_Undertakers_film_(graveyard_and_animation).vtt" new file mode 100644 index 00000000..13d468fb --- /dev/null +++ "b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_11_\342\200\224_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/6_Undertakers_film_(graveyard_and_animation).vtt" @@ -0,0 +1,10 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit starts at anchor #6 + +00:13:03.500 --> 00:13:15.000 +[action] Graveyard: the self-moving coffin enters. A vicar motions unseen gravediggers to get out. From the grave climb: two gravediggers… then two more… then two more… yet another two… two miners… two uniformed men… a police dog with handler… and finally an Australian surfboarder. The coffin makes its way into the grave. + +00:13:15.000 --> 00:13:24.000 +[action] A wonderful Terry Gilliam animation: a very fast collage of extremely sexy stills of half-dressed and naked girls. + diff --git "a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_11_\342\200\224_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/7_Eighteenth-century_social_legislation.vtt" "b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_11_\342\200\224_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/7_Eighteenth-century_social_legislation.vtt" new file mode 100644 index 00000000..d12b5864 --- /dev/null +++ "b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_11_\342\200\224_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/7_Eighteenth-century_social_legislation.vtt" @@ -0,0 +1,34 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit starts at anchor #7 + +00:13:24.000 --> 00:13:28.000 +[music] Incredibly torchy music. + +00:13:28.000 --> 00:13:34.000 +[caption] 'THE WORLD OF HISTORY' | [caption] 'SOCIAL LEGISLATION IN THE EIGHTEENTH CENTURY' + +00:13:34.000 --> 00:13:44.000 +[action] Alluring boudoir; Carol on plush bed in stockings, suspenders, etc., miming to a very masculine voice. CAPTION: 'A. J. P. TAYLOR'. + +00:13:44.000 --> 00:13:59.000 + +Good evening. Tonight I want to examine the whole question of eighteenth-century social legislation - its relevance to the hierarchical structure of post-Renaissance society, and its impact on the future of parochial organization in an expanding agrarian economy. But first a bit of fun. + +00:13:59.000 --> 00:14:03.000 +[action] Film of eight-second striptease. Cut back to same set. + +00:14:03.000 --> 00:14:07.000 + +To put England's social legislation in a European context is Professor Gert Van Der Whoops of the Rijksmuseum in the Hague. + +00:14:07.000 --> 00:14:15.000 +[action] Another seductive bed; a bespectacled professor is being caressed and undressed by an amorous siren. + +00:14:15.000 --> 00:14:28.000 + +[German accent] In Holland in the early part of the fifteenth century there was three things important to social legislation. One … rise of merchant classes … two, urbanization of craft guilds… three, declining moral values in age of increasing social betterment. But first, a bit of fun … [grabs girl] + +00:14:28.000 --> 00:14:37.000 +[action] A curtain and potted palms. Angel choirs. A man in dinner jacket with angel wings is lowered, reads: 'And now Professor R.J. Canning.' He rises as choirs resume. + diff --git "a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_11_\342\200\224_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/8_The_Battle_of_Trafalgar.vtt" "b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_11_\342\200\224_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/8_The_Battle_of_Trafalgar.vtt" new file mode 100644 index 00000000..1cdc3e6a --- /dev/null +++ "b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_11_\342\200\224_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/8_The_Battle_of_Trafalgar.vtt" @@ -0,0 +1,72 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit starts at anchor #8 + +00:14:37.000 --> 00:14:44.000 +[caption] 'PROFESSOR R. J. CANNING AGAIN' + +00:14:44.000 --> 00:15:06.000 + +The cat sat on the mat. And now the Battle of Trafalgar… [behind him: a contemporary picture of Trafalgar flashes up] Tonight we examine popular views of this great battle. Was the Battle of Trafalgar fought in the Atlantic off southern Spain? Or was it fought on dry land near Cudworth in Yorkshire? Here is one man who thinks it was… + +00:15:06.000 --> 00:15:11.000 +[action] A Gumby stands in a field: gum boots, rolled trousers, knotted handkerchief, looking very thick. + +00:15:11.000 --> 00:15:14.000 + +[voice over] And here is his friend. + +00:15:14.000 --> 00:15:18.000 +[action] Camera pans to reveal another identical Gumby next to him; pans back. CAPTION: 'PROFFESOR R. J. GUMBY'. + +00:15:18.000 --> 00:15:22.000 + +[voice over] What makes you think the Battle of Trafalgar was fought near Cudworth? + +00:15:22.000 --> 00:15:27.000 +[action] There is a long pause. + +00:15:27.000 --> 00:15:33.000 + +Because … Drake … was … too … clever for… the German … fleet. + +00:15:33.000 --> 00:15:35.000 + +I beg your pardon? + +00:15:35.000 --> 00:15:38.000 + +… Oh I've forgotten what I said now. + +00:15:38.000 --> 00:15:44.000 + +[voice over] Mr Gumby's remarkable views have sparked off a wave of controversy amongst his fellow historians. + +00:15:44.000 --> 00:15:49.000 +[action] Identical Gumby in a book-lined study. CAPTION: 'F. H. GUMBY. REGIUS PROFESSOR OF HISTORY AT HIS MOTHER'S'. + +00:15:49.000 --> 00:15:56.000 + +Well I rink … we … should … reappraise … our concept of the … Battle of Trafalgar. + +00:15:56.000 --> 00:16:01.000 +[action] Another Gumby outside a university. CAPTION: 'PROF. L. R. GUMBY'. + +00:16:01.000 --> 00:16:04.000 + +Well… well… I agree with everything Mr Gumby says. + +00:16:04.000 --> 00:16:09.000 +[action] Another Gumby in a pig-sty. CAPTION: 'PROF. ENID GUMBY'. + +00:16:09.000 --> 00:16:12.000 + +Well, I think cement is more interesting than people think. + +00:16:12.000 --> 00:16:18.000 +[action] Original sexy girl in boudoir mimes to masculine voice. CAPTION: 'A. J. P. TAYLOR'. + +00:16:18.000 --> 00:16:22.000 + +One subject… four different views … [brandishes egg-whisk] twelve and six… in a plain wrapper. + diff --git "a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_11_\342\200\224_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/9_Batley_Townswomens_Guild_presents_the_Battle_of_Pearl_Harbour.vtt" "b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_11_\342\200\224_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/9_Batley_Townswomens_Guild_presents_the_Battle_of_Pearl_Harbour.vtt" new file mode 100644 index 00000000..d8b8d3da --- /dev/null +++ "b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_11_\342\200\224_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/9_Batley_Townswomens_Guild_presents_the_Battle_of_Pearl_Harbour.vtt" @@ -0,0 +1,49 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit starts at anchor #9 + +00:16:22.000 --> 00:16:40.000 + +The stuff of history is indeed woven in the woof. Pearl Harbour. There are pages in history's book which are written on the grand scale. Events so momentous that they dwarf man and time alike. And such is the Battle of Pearl Harbour, re-enacted for us now by the women of Barley Townswomen's Guild. + +00:16:40.000 --> 00:16:46.000 +[action] A muddy corner of a field. Miss Rita Fairbanks speaks to camera. Five more pepperpots lurk behind. + +00:16:46.000 --> 00:16:51.000 + +[voice over] Miss Rita Fairbanks - you organized this reconstruction of the Battle of Pearl Harbour - why? + +00:16:51.000 --> 00:17:05.000 + +Well we've always been extremely interested in modern drama … we were of course the first Townswomen's Guild to perform 'Camp On Blood Island', and last year we did our extremely popular re-enactment of 'Nazi War Atrocities'. So this year we thought we would like to do something in a lighter vein… + +00:17:05.000 --> 00:17:08.000 + +So you chose the Battle of Pearl Harbour? + +00:17:08.000 --> 00:17:10.000 + +Yes, that's right, we did. + +00:17:10.000 --> 00:17:14.000 + +Well I can see you're all ready to go. So I'll just wish you good luck in your latest venture. + +00:17:14.000 --> 00:17:16.000 + +Thank you very much, young man. + +00:17:16.000 --> 00:17:20.000 +[action] She retreats and joins the other ladies, who separate into two opposing sides. + +00:17:20.000 --> 00:17:26.000 + +[reverential voice over] Ladies and gentlemen, the World of History is proud to present the premiere of the Batley Townswomen's Guild's re-enactment of 'The Battle of Pearl Harbour'. + +00:17:26.000 --> 00:17:34.000 +[action] A whistle blows and the two sides set about each other with handbags etc., speeded up 50% to give it edge. + +00:17:34.000 --> 00:17:41.000 + +The Battle of Pearl Harbour. Incidentally, I'm sorry if I got a little bit shirty earlier on in the programme, when I kept getting interrupted by all these films and things that kept coming in, but I… + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_12_-_Just_the_Words__Episode_Twelve/0_Episode12_head_tail.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_12_-_Just_the_Words__Episode_Twelve/0_Episode12_head_tail.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..9553fe40 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_12_-_Just_the_Words__Episode_Twelve/0_Episode12_head_tail.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,36 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Intro titles, opening animation, signalbox cold open, Spectrum stingers, and closing credits + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:02.500 +[caption] 'MONTY PYTHON'S FLYING CIRCUS' — EPISODES 17–26 — THE NAKED ANT — A SIGNALBOX SOMEWHERE NEAR HOVE + +00:00:02.500 --> 00:00:04.500 + +It's... + +00:00:04.500 --> 00:00:07.500 +[action] Opening animation. + +00:00:07.500 --> 00:00:09.000 + +I know you're down there. + +00:00:09.000 --> 00:00:13.000 +[action] Interior signalbox. A signalman wrestles a bear for 3.48 seconds. + +00:08:30.000 --> 00:08:34.000 + +Foam at the mouth and fall over backwards. Is he foaming at the mouth to fall over backwards or falling over backwards to foam at the mouth... + +00:08:34.000 --> 00:08:36.000 + +Goodnight. + +00:28:30.000 --> 00:28:35.000 + +What do we mean by no, what do we mean by yes, what do we mean by no, no, no. Tonight Spectrum looks at the whole question of what is no. + +00:28:35.000 --> 00:28:38.000 +[action] A sixteen-ton weight falls on the presenter. The 'It's' man runs away. [caption] CREDITS + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_12_-_Just_the_Words__Episode_Twelve/1_Falling_from_building.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_12_-_Just_the_Words__Episode_Twelve/1_Falling_from_building.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..eb868c0a --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_12_-_Just_the_Words__Episode_Twelve/1_Falling_from_building.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,170 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Office workers comment as bodies fall past their window; complaint letter gag interrupts. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 +[caption] BUT IN AN OFFICE OFF THE GOSWELL ROAD + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:09.000 +[action] Two office workers sit at desks high up; a body drops past the window. + +00:00:09.000 --> 00:00:11.500 + +Hey, did you see that? + +00:00:11.500 --> 00:00:12.500 + +Uhm? + +00:00:12.500 --> 00:00:15.500 + +Did you see somebody go past the window? + +00:00:15.500 --> 00:00:17.000 + +What? + +00:00:17.000 --> 00:00:22.000 + +Somebody just went past the window. That way. [action] Indicates down. + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:24.000 + +[flatly] Oh. Oh. + +00:00:24.000 --> 00:00:28.000 +[action] Another body hurtles past. + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:29.500 + +Another one. + +00:00:29.500 --> 00:00:30.500 + +Huh? + +00:00:30.500 --> 00:00:33.000 + +Another one just went past downwards. + +00:00:33.000 --> 00:00:34.000 + +What? + +00:00:34.000 --> 00:00:39.000 + +Two people have just fallen out of that window to their almost certain death. + +00:00:39.000 --> 00:00:41.000 + +Fine, fine. Fine. + +00:00:41.000 --> 00:00:46.000 + +Look! Two people [action] another falls [dialogue] three people have just fallen past that window. + +00:00:46.000 --> 00:00:48.000 + +Must be a board meeting. + +00:00:48.000 --> 00:00:52.000 + +Oh yeah. [action] another falls past [dialogue] Hey. That was Wilkins of finance. + +00:00:52.000 --> 00:00:54.000 + +Oh, no, that was Robertson. + +00:00:54.000 --> 00:00:55.500 + +Wilkins. + +00:00:55.500 --> 00:00:57.000 + +Robertson. + +00:00:57.000 --> 00:00:58.500 + +Wilkins. + +00:00:58.500 --> 00:01:00.000 + +Robertson. + +00:01:00.000 --> 00:01:02.000 +[action] Another falls. + +00:01:02.000 --> 00:01:03.500 + +That was Wilkins. + +00:01:03.500 --> 00:01:08.500 + +That was Wilkins. He was a good, good, er, golfer, Wilkins. + +00:01:08.500 --> 00:01:12.000 + +Very good golfer. Very good golfer. Rotten at finance. It'll be Parkinson next. + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:13.500 + +Bet you it won't. + +00:01:13.500 --> 00:01:14.500 + +How much. + +00:01:14.500 --> 00:01:15.500 + +What? + +00:01:15.500 --> 00:01:18.500 + +How much do you bet it won't? Fiver? + +00:01:18.500 --> 00:01:19.500 + +All right. + +00:01:19.500 --> 00:01:20.500 + +Done. + +00:01:20.500 --> 00:01:21.500 + +You're on. + +00:01:21.500 --> 00:01:25.000 + +Fine. [action] They shake; they watch the window. [dialogue] Come on Parky. + +00:01:25.000 --> 00:01:26.500 + +Don't do it Parky. + +00:01:26.500 --> 00:01:29.500 + +Come on Parky. Jump Parky. Jump. + +00:01:29.500 --> 00:01:31.500 + +Come on now be sensible Parky. + +00:01:31.500 --> 00:01:36.000 +[action] Cut to letter. + +00:01:36.000 --> 00:01:43.000 + +Dear Sir, I am writing to complain about that sketch about people falling out of a high building. I have worked all my life in such a building and have never once.... arrgghhh [splat] + +00:01:43.000 --> 00:01:46.500 +[action] Film of man falling out of window. Cut back to the office. + +00:01:46.500 --> 00:01:47.500 + +Parkinson! + +00:01:47.500 --> 00:01:48.500 + +Johnson! + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_12_-_Just_the_Words__Episode_Twelve/2_'Spectrum'_-_talking_about_things.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_12_-_Just_the_Words__Episode_Twelve/2_'Spectrum'_-_talking_about_things.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..d7c585e6 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_12_-_Just_the_Words__Episode_Twelve/2_'Spectrum'_-_talking_about_things.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,66 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Parody current-affairs programme interrogates the question of 'what is going on' and language pedantry. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:03.000 +[caption] SPECTRUM + +00:00:03.000 --> 00:00:15.000 + +Good evening. Tonight 'Spectrum' looks at one of the major problems in the world today - that old vexed question of what is going on. Is there still time to confront it, let alone solve it, or is it too late? What are the figures, what are the facts, what do people mean when they talk about things? Alexander Hardacre of the Economic Affairs Bureau. + +00:00:15.000 --> 00:00:22.000 +[action] Cut to pundit before a graph with three coloured columns. + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:28.000 + +In this graph, this column represents 23% of the population. This column represents 28% of the population, and this column represents 43% of the population. + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:34.000 + +Telling figures indeed, but what do they mean to you, what do they mean to me, what do they mean to the average man in the street? With me now is Professor Tiddles of Leeds University... + +00:00:34.000 --> 00:00:37.000 +[action] Reveal bearded professor beside presenter. + +00:00:37.000 --> 00:00:40.000 + +... Professor, you've spent many years researching into things, what do you think? + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:42.000 + +I think it's too early to tell. + +00:00:42.000 --> 00:00:58.000 + +'Too early to tell' ... too early to say... it means the same thing. The word 'say' is the same as the word 'tell'. They're not spelt the same, but they mean the same. It's an identical situation, we have with 'ship' and 'boat' [action] holds up signs 'ship' and 'boat' [dialogue] but not the same as we have with 'bow' and 'bough' [action] holds up signs [dialogue] they're spelt differently, mean different things but sound the same. [action] holds up signs 'so there' [dialogue] But the real question remains. What is the solution, if any, to this problem? What can we do? What am I saying? Why am I sitting in this chair? Why am I on this programme? And what am I going to say next? Here to answer this is a professional cricketer. + +00:00:58.000 --> 00:01:01.000 +[action] Cut to cricketer. + +00:01:01.000 --> 00:01:03.000 + +I can say nothing at this point. + +00:01:03.000 --> 00:01:05.500 + +Well, you were wrong... Professor? + +00:01:05.500 --> 00:01:07.000 + +Hello. + +00:01:07.000 --> 00:01:17.000 + +Hello. So... where do we stand? Where do we stand? Where do we sit? Where do we come? Where do we go? What do we do? What do we say? What do we eat? What do we drink? What do we think? What do we do? + +00:01:17.000 --> 00:01:25.000 +[action] Stock film of London–Brighton train in two minutes; tunnel; loud crash. Cut to signalbox. + +00:01:25.000 --> 00:01:27.000 + +[calling out of window] Sorry! + +00:01:27.000 --> 00:01:30.000 +[action] He resumes wrestling the bear. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_12_-_Just_the_Words__Episode_Twelve/3_Visitors_from_Coventry.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_12_-_Just_the_Words__Episode_Twelve/3_Visitors_from_Coventry.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..0b2f08f9 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_12_-_Just_the_Words__Episode_Twelve/3_Visitors_from_Coventry.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,85 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Mr and Mrs Johnson arrive at a Minehead boarding house; travel minutiae ensue. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:05.000 +[caption] A SMALL BOARDING HOUSE IN MINEHEAD, SOMERSET + +00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:10.000 +[action] Landlady opens the front door to the holidaying Johnsons. + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:12.500 + +Hello, Mr and Mrs Johnson? + +00:00:12.500 --> 00:00:14.000 + +That's right. Yes. + +00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:20.000 + +Well come on in, excuse me not shaking hands, I've just been putting a bit of lard on the cat's boil. + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:21.500 + +Very nice. + +00:00:21.500 --> 00:00:25.000 + +Well you must be tired, it's a long way from Coventry, isn't it? + +00:00:25.000 --> 00:00:35.000 + +Well, we usually reckon on five and a half hours and it took us six hours and fifty-three minutes, with the twenty-five minute stop at Frampton Cottrell to stretch our legs, only we had to wait half an hour to get onto the M5 at Droitwich. + +00:00:35.000 --> 00:00:36.500 + +Really? + +00:00:36.500 --> 00:00:44.000 + +Then there was a three mile queue just before Bridgewater on the A38. We usually come round on the B3339 just before Bridgewater, you see... + +00:00:44.000 --> 00:00:45.000 + +Really? + +00:00:45.000 --> 00:00:50.000 + +Ye, but this time we decided to risk it because they're always saying they're going to widen it there. + +00:00:50.000 --> 00:00:51.000 + +Are they? + +00:00:51.000 --> 00:01:08.000 + +Yes well just by the intersection, there where the A372 joins up, there's plenty of room to widen it there, there's only grass verges. They could get another six feet...knock down that hospital... Then we took the coast road through Williton and got all the Taunton traffic on the A358 from Crowcombe and Stogumber... + +00:01:08.000 --> 00:01:11.000 + +Well you must be dying for a cup of tea. + +00:01:11.000 --> 00:01:14.000 + +Well, wouldn't say no, not if it's warm and wet. + +00:01:14.000 --> 00:01:17.000 + +Well come on in the lounge, I'm just going to serve afternoon tea. + +00:01:17.000 --> 00:01:20.000 +[action] They enter the lounge; another couple, the Phillipses, are seated. + +00:01:20.000 --> 00:01:24.000 + +Come on in, Mr and Mrs Johnson, oh this is Mr and Mrs Phillips. + +00:01:24.000 --> 00:01:25.500 + +Good afternoon. + +00:01:25.500 --> 00:01:27.000 + +Thank you. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_12_-_Just_the_Words__Episode_Twelve/4_Mr_Hilter.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_12_-_Just_the_Words__Episode_Twelve/4_Mr_Hilter.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..32a74ca7 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_12_-_Just_the_Words__Episode_Twelve/4_Mr_Hilter.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,150 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Hitler, Himmler, and 'Ron Vibbentrop' hide in Minehead boarding house; campaign for local by-election. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 + +It's their third time here with us, we can't keep you away can we? Ha, ha, and over here is Mr Hilter. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:10.000 +[action] Hitler sits poring over a map in full Nazi uniform; Himmler and Von Ribbentrop with him. + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:12.000 + +Ach. Good time...good afternoon. + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:15.000 + +Ooh planning a little excursion are we Mr Hilter? + +00:00:15.000 --> 00:00:21.000 + +Ja, ja. We haff a little... [aside] Was ist rückweise bewegen? + +00:00:21.000 --> 00:00:22.000 + +Hike. + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:23.500 + +Hiking. + +00:00:23.500 --> 00:00:27.000 + +Ah yes, ve make a little hike for, for Bideford. + +00:00:27.000 --> 00:00:34.000 + +[leaning over map] Oh well, you'll want the A39 then...no, no, you've got the wrong map there, this is Stalingrad, you want the Ilfracombe and Barnstaple section. + +00:00:34.000 --> 00:00:40.000 + +Ah! Hein...Reginald you have the wrong map here you silly old leg-before-wicket English person. + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:45.000 + +I'm sorry mein Fuhrer. I did not— [action] Hitler slaps him [dialogue] Mein Dickie old chum. + +00:00:45.000 --> 00:00:51.000 + +Lucky Mr Johnson pointed that out, eh? You wouldn't have had much fun in Stalingrad, would you... [action] they don't see the joke [dialogue] I said, you wouldn't have had much fun in Stalingrad, would you, ha, ha, ha? + +00:00:51.000 --> 00:00:54.000 + +[through clenched teeth] Not much fun in Stalingrad, no. + +00:00:54.000 --> 00:00:58.000 + +Oh I'm sorry I didn't introduce you. This is Ron...Ron Vibbentrop. + +00:00:58.000 --> 00:01:00.500 + +Oh, not Von Ribbentrop, eh? + +00:01:00.500 --> 00:01:13.000 + +[leaping, then covering] Nein! Nein! Nein! Oh!! Ha, ha, ha. no different other chap. No I in Somerset am being born. Von Ribbentrop is born Gotterdammerstrasse 46, Düsseldorf, West Eight. So they say! + +00:01:13.000 --> 00:01:17.000 + +And this is the quiet one, Mr Bimmler - Heimlich Bimmler. + +00:01:17.000 --> 00:01:38.000 + +How do you do there squire, also I am not Minehead lad but I in Peterborough, Lincolnshire was given birth to, but stay in Peterborough Lincolnshire house all during war, owing to nasty running sores, and was unable to go in the streets play football or go to Nürnberg. I am retired window cleaner and pacifist, without doing war crimes— tch tch tch— and am glad England win World Cup - Bobby Charlton, Martin Peters - and eating lots of chips and fish and hole in the toads, and Dundee cakes on Piccadilly line. Don't you know old chap I was head of Gestapo for ten years. Five years! No, no, nein, I was not head of Gestapo at all...I make joke. + +00:01:38.000 --> 00:01:44.000 + +Oooh, Mr Bimmler, you do have us on. [action] A telephone rings. [dialogue] Oh excuse me I must go and answer that. + +00:01:44.000 --> 00:01:47.000 + +How long are you down here for, Mr Hilter. Just the fortnight? + +00:01:47.000 --> 00:01:54.000 + +[shouting] Why do you ask that? Are you a spy or something? [action] drawing revolver [dialogue] Get over there against the wall Britischer pig, you're going to die! + +00:01:54.000 --> 00:01:57.000 +[action] Von Ribbentrop and Himmler grab Hitler and calm him. + +00:01:57.000 --> 00:01:58.500 + +Take it easy Dickie old chum. + +00:01:58.500 --> 00:02:02.000 + +I'm sorry Mr. Johnson, he's a bit on edge. He hasn't slept since 1945. + +00:02:02.000 --> 00:02:04.000 + +Shut your cake hole you Nazi. + +00:02:04.000 --> 00:02:05.500 + +Cool it Führer cat! + +00:02:05.500 --> 00:02:07.000 + +Ha, ha, ha. [laughing it off] The fun we have. + +00:02:07.000 --> 00:02:09.000 + +Haven't I seen him on the television? + +00:02:09.000 --> 00:02:11.000 + +Nicht. Nein. Nein, oh no. + +00:02:11.000 --> 00:02:12.500 + +Television Doctor? + +00:02:12.500 --> 00:02:14.000 + +No!!! No! + +00:02:14.000 --> 00:02:19.000 + +Telephone, Mr Hilter, it's that nice Mr McGoering from the Bell and Compasses. He says he's found a place where you can hire bombers by the hour. + +00:02:19.000 --> 00:02:21.500 + +If he opens his big mouth again...it's lampshade time! + +00:02:21.500 --> 00:02:27.000 + +[controlling Hitler toward door] Shut up! [action] Hitler exits [dialogue] Hire bombers by the hour, ha ha, what a laugh he is, that Scottish person. Good old Norman. [action] he exits + +00:02:27.000 --> 00:02:29.000 + +He's on the phone the whole time nowadays. + +00:02:29.000 --> 00:02:30.500 + +In business is he? + +00:02:30.500 --> 00:02:31.500 + +Soon baby! + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_12_-_Just_the_Words__Episode_Twelve/5_The_Minehead_by-election.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_12_-_Just_the_Words__Episode_Twelve/5_The_Minehead_by-election.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..2dde715d --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_12_-_Just_the_Words__Episode_Twelve/5_The_Minehead_by-election.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,97 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Mr Hilter campaigns as National Bocialist candidate; balcony speech, vox pops, and Spectrum tag. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:05.000 + +Well it's the North Minehead bye-election. Mr Hilter's standing as the National Bocialist candidate. He's got wonderful plans for Minehead. + +00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:06.500 + +Like what? + +00:00:06.500 --> 00:00:08.500 + +Well, for a start he wants to annex Poland. + +00:00:08.500 --> 00:00:11.000 + +Oh, North Minehead's Conservative, isn't it? + +00:00:11.000 --> 00:00:13.000 + +Well, they get a lot of people at their rallies. + +00:00:13.000 --> 00:00:15.000 + +Rallies? + +00:00:15.000 --> 00:00:19.000 + +Well, their Bocalist meetings, down at the Axis Café in Rosedale Road. + +00:00:19.000 --> 00:00:27.000 +[action] Grotty Italian café: 'Axis Café'. Mussolini-like figure posts 'Vote for Hitler'. Hitler, Von Ribbentrop, and Himmler cycle past campaigning. + +00:00:27.000 --> 00:00:37.000 + +I am not a racialist, but, und this is a big but, we in the National Bocialist Party believe das Überleben muss gestammen sein mit der schneaky Armstrong-Jones. Historische Taunton ist Volkermeinig von Meinhead. + +00:00:37.000 --> 00:00:41.000 + +[stepping forward] Mr Hitler, Hilter, he says that historically Taunton is a part of Minehead already. + +00:00:41.000 --> 00:00:43.500 + +He's right, do you know that? + +00:00:43.500 --> 00:00:48.000 + +Und Bridgwater ist die letzte Fühlung das wir haben in Somerset! + +00:00:48.000 --> 00:00:53.000 +[action] Loud applause and 'Sieg Heils' from a gramophone; yokel looks around to see Von Ribbentrop operating it. + +00:00:53.000 --> 00:00:55.500 + +[vo] What do you think of Mr Hilter's politics. + +00:00:55.500 --> 00:00:58.500 + +I don't like the sound of these 'ere boncentration bamps. + +00:00:58.500 --> 00:01:01.500 + +Well, I gave him my baby to kiss and he bit it on the head. + +00:01:01.500 --> 00:01:04.000 + +Well, I think he'd do a lot of good to the Stock Exchange. + +00:01:04.000 --> 00:01:05.000 + +No...no... + +00:01:05.000 --> 00:01:08.000 + +[thinly disguised as yokel] Oh yes Britischer pals he is wunderbar...ful. So. + +00:01:08.000 --> 00:01:11.000 + +I think he's right about the coons, but then I'm a bit mental. + +00:01:11.000 --> 00:01:13.000 + +I think he's got beautiful legs! + +00:01:13.000 --> 00:01:20.000 + +Well speaking as Conservative candidate I just drone on and on and on...never letting anyone else get a word in edgeways, until I start foaming at the mouth and fall over backwards. + +00:01:20.000 --> 00:01:22.000 +[action] He foams at the mouth and falls over backwards. + +00:01:22.000 --> 00:01:35.000 + +Foam at the mouth and fall over backwards. Is he foaming at the mouth to fall over backwards or falling over backwards to foam at the mouth. Tonight 'Spectrum' examines the whole question of frothing and falling, coughing and calling, screaming and bawling, walling and stalling, galling and mauling, palling and hauling, trawling and squalling and zalling. Zalling? Is there a word zalling? If there is what does it mean...if there isn't what does it mean? Perhaps both. Maybe neither. What do I mean by the word mean? What do I mean by the word word, what do I mean by what do I mean, what do I mean by do, and what do I do by mean? What do I do by do by do and what do I do by wasting your time like this? Goodnight. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_12_-_Just_the_Words__Episode_Twelve/6_Police_station_(silly_voices).vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_12_-_Just_the_Words__Episode_Twelve/6_Police_station_(silly_voices).vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..3728c2b0 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_12_-_Just_the_Words__Episode_Twelve/6_Police_station_(silly_voices).vtt @@ -0,0 +1,184 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE A man reports a burglary amid pitch, volume, and speed absurdities among policemen. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:03.000 +[action] Police station. First Sergeant behind counter, to camera. + +00:00:03.000 --> 00:00:04.500 + +Goodnight. + +00:00:04.500 --> 00:00:07.500 +[action] Camera pulls back to reveal a man at the counter. + +00:00:07.500 --> 00:00:10.500 + +Good evening, I wish to report a burglary. + +00:00:10.500 --> 00:00:12.500 + +Speak up please, sir. + +00:00:12.500 --> 00:00:14.500 + +I wish to report a burglary. + +00:00:14.500 --> 00:00:16.000 + +I can't hear you, sir. + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:18.500 + +[bellowing] I wish to report a burglary! + +00:00:18.500 --> 00:00:22.000 + +That's a little bit too loud. Can you say it just a little less loud than that? + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:25.000 + +[a little louder than normal] I wish to report a burglary. + +00:00:25.000 --> 00:00:28.000 + +No... I'm still not getting anything... Er, could you try it in a higher register? + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:30.000 + +What do you mean in a higher register? + +00:00:30.000 --> 00:00:31.000 + +What? + +00:00:31.000 --> 00:00:33.000 + +[high-pitched] I wish to report a burglary. + +00:00:33.000 --> 00:00:36.000 + +Ah! That's it, hang on a moment. [action] gets pencil and paper [dialogue] Now a little bit louder. + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:38.000 + +[louder, higher] I wish to report a burglary. + +00:00:38.000 --> 00:00:39.500 + +Report a what? + +00:00:39.500 --> 00:00:41.000 + +[ridiculously high] Burglary! + +00:00:41.000 --> 00:00:43.000 + +That's the exact frequency... now keep it there. + +00:00:43.000 --> 00:00:45.000 +[action] Another sergeant enters to the back of the counter. + +00:00:45.000 --> 00:00:46.500 + +[high-pitched] Hello, sarge! + +00:00:46.500 --> 00:00:48.000 + +[very deep] Evening Charlie. + +00:00:48.000 --> 00:00:53.000 +[action] Man continues his tale, still in a shriek. + +00:00:53.000 --> 00:00:58.000 + +I was sitting at home with a friend of mine from Camber Sands, when we heard a noise in the bedroom. We went to investigate and found £5,000 stolen. + +00:00:58.000 --> 00:01:01.000 + +Well, I'm afraid I'm going off duty now sir. Er, could you tell First Sergeant Foster? + +00:01:01.000 --> 00:01:04.000 +[action] First Sergeant leaves; Second Sergeant steps up, smiling. + +00:01:04.000 --> 00:01:06.500 + +[still shrieking] I was sitting at home with a friend of mine. + +00:01:06.500 --> 00:01:09.000 + +Excuse me sir, but, er, why the funny voice? + +00:01:09.000 --> 00:01:12.000 + +[normal] Oh, terribly sorry. I'd just got used to talking like that to the other sergeant. + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:15.000 + +I'm terribly sorry... I can't hear you, sir, could you try speaking in a lower register? + +00:01:15.000 --> 00:01:19.000 + +What! Oh [very deep] I wish to report the loss of £5,000. + +00:01:19.000 --> 00:01:22.000 + +£5,000? That's serious, you'd better speak to the detective inspector. + +00:01:22.000 --> 00:01:25.000 +[action] Detective Inspector exits office on cue. + +00:01:25.000 --> 00:01:28.000 + +[very slow, deep] What's the trouble, sergeant? + +00:01:28.000 --> 00:01:33.000 + +[fantastic speed] Well- this- gentleman- sir- has- just- come- in- to- report- that- he- was- sitting- at- home- with- a- friend- when- he- heard- a- noise- in- the- backroom- went- round- to- investigate- and- found- that-£5,000- in- savings- had- been- stolen. + +00:01:33.000 --> 00:01:36.000 + +[deep] I see. [to man, normal] Where do you live sir? + +00:01:36.000 --> 00:01:38.000 + +[normal] 121, Halliwell Road, Dulwich, SE21 + +00:01:38.000 --> 00:01:40.000 +[action] Inspector strains to hear; Second Sergeant helps. + +00:01:40.000 --> 00:01:41.500 + +[fast] 121- Halliwell- Road- Dulwich- SE21 + +00:01:41.500 --> 00:01:43.000 + +[squeak] Another Halliwell Road job eh, sergeant? + +00:01:43.000 --> 00:01:45.000 + +[fast] Yes- I- can't- believe- it- I- thought- the- bloke- who'd- done- that- was- put- inside- last- year. + +00:01:45.000 --> 00:01:46.500 + +[squeak] Yes, in Parkhurst. + +00:01:46.500 --> 00:01:48.000 + +[deep] Well it must have been somebody else. + +00:01:48.000 --> 00:01:54.000 + +[very deep] Thank you, sergeant. [to man, normal] We'll get things moving right away, sir. [high shriek to first sergeant] You take over here, sergeant [very deep to second] Alert all squad cars in the area. [ridiculous sing-song into phone] Ha-allo Dar-ling, I'm afra-ID I sh-A-ll BE L-ate H-O-me this evening. + +00:01:54.000 --> 00:01:58.000 + +[singing, operatic tenor over radio] Calling all squad cars in the area... + +00:01:58.000 --> 00:02:06.000 +[vox pops] Lovely Girl: [deep male dub] I think that's in very bad taste. / Pig: [meows] / Giraffe: [barks] / President Nixon: [sheep bleating] + +00:02:06.000 --> 00:02:08.500 + +Some people do talk in the most extraordinary way. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_12_-_Just_the_Words__Episode_Twelve/7_Upperclass_Twit_of_the_Year.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_12_-_Just_the_Words__Episode_Twelve/7_Upperclass_Twit_of_the_Year.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..2e5c48d2 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_12_-_Just_the_Words__Episode_Twelve/7_Upperclass_Twit_of_the_Year.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,21 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Sports broadcast of absurd challenges culminating in self-shooting finale and letter VO. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 +[action] The five competitors run onto Hurlingham Park. + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:01:30.000 + +Good afternoon and welcome to Hurlingham Park. You join us just as the competitors are running out onto the field on this lovely winter's afternoon here, with the going firm underfoot and very little sign of rain. Well it certainly looks as though we're in for a splendid afternoon's sport in this the 127th Upperclass Twit of the Year Show. Well the competitors will be off in a moment so let me just identify for you. Vivian Smith-Smythe-Smith has an O-level in chemo-hygiene. Simon-Zinc-Trumpet-Harris, married to a very attractive table lamp. Nigel Incubator-Jones, his best friend is a tree, and in his spare time he's a stockbroker. Gervaise Brook-Hampster is in the Guards, and his father uses him as a wastepaper basket. And finally Oliver St John-Mollusc, Harrow and the Guards, thought by many to be this year's outstanding twit. Now they're moving up to the starting line, there's a jolly good crowd here today. Now they're under starter's orders ... and they're off! Ah no, they're not... + +00:01:30.000 --> 00:03:40.000 +[play-by-play] Straight line; matchbox jump; Kicking the Beggar; Hunt Ball Photograph; reversing into old woman; wake up the neighbour; insult the waiter; get under the bar; shoot the rabbit; remove bras from the front; final obstacle: shoot themselves. Gervaise shoots himself and wins; results announced. + +00:03:40.000 --> 00:03:55.000 + +Dear Sir, how splendid it is to see the flower of British manhood wiping itself out with such pluck and tenacity. Britain need have no fear with leaders of this calibre. If only a few of the so-called working class would destroy themselves so sportingly. Yours etc., Brigadier Mainwaring Smith Smith Smith etc. Deceased etc. PS etc. Come on other ranks, show your stuff. + +00:03:55.000 --> 00:04:10.000 +[animation] Soldier coughs; leg falls off; disintegrates; approved. A hand (Terry J.) stuffs animated bits into a pipe; strange beasties emerge. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_12_-_Just_the_Words__Episode_Twelve/8_Ken_Shabby.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_12_-_Just_the_Words__Episode_Twelve/8_Ken_Shabby.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..bf7f7b7a --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_12_-_Just_the_Words__Episode_Twelve/8_Ken_Shabby.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,93 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Ken Shabby asks to marry Rosamund; grotesque manners meet noble father; photo-caption interlude. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Hearts-of-Oak music over a beautiful country home; track into elegant lounge. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:08.500 + +Now I understand that you want to marry my daughter? + +00:00:08.500 --> 00:00:13.500 + +[sniffing and coughing] That's right ... yeah... yeah... + +00:00:13.500 --> 00:00:16.000 + +Yes, you realize of course that Rosamund is still rather young? + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:19.000 + +Daddy you make me feel like a child. + +00:00:19.000 --> 00:00:26.000 + +[lascivious] Oh yeah ... you know... get 'em when they're young eh... eh! OOOOH! Know what I mean eh, oooh! [action] obscene elbow gesture + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:29.000 + +Well I'm sure you know what I mean, Mr ... er... Mr... er .. er? + +00:00:29.000 --> 00:00:30.500 + +Shabby... Ken Shabby... + +00:00:30.500 --> 00:00:34.000 + +Mr Shabby... I just want to make sure that you'll be able to look after daughter... + +00:00:34.000 --> 00:00:37.000 + +Oh yeah, yeah. I'll be able to look after 'er all right sport, eh, know what I mean, eh emggh! + +00:00:37.000 --> 00:00:39.000 + +And, er, what job do you do? + +00:00:39.000 --> 00:00:41.000 + +I clean out public lavatories. + +00:00:41.000 --> 00:00:42.500 + +Is there promotion involved? + +00:00:42.500 --> 00:00:48.000 + +Oh yeah, yeah. [action] hawks into handkerchief horribly [dialogue] After five years they give me a brush... eurggha eurgh ... I'm sorry squire, I've gobbed on your carpet... + +00:00:48.000 --> 00:00:50.000 + +And, ah, where are you going to live? + +00:00:50.000 --> 00:00:56.000 + +Well round at my gran's... she trains polecats, but most of them have suffocated so there should be a bit of spare room in the attic, eh. Know what I mean. Oooh! + +00:00:56.000 --> 00:00:58.000 + +And when do you expect to get married? + +00:00:58.000 --> 00:01:02.000 + +Oh, right away sport. Right away... you know... I haven't had it for weeks... + +00:01:02.000 --> 00:01:05.000 + +Well look I'll phone the bishop and see if we can get the Abbey... + +00:01:05.000 --> 00:01:07.000 + +Oh, diarrhoea. [action] coughing fit + +00:01:07.000 --> 00:01:20.000 +[caption sequence] The story so far... Rosamund's father ensnared by Mr Shabby's personal magnetism... photo captions montage... + +00:01:20.000 --> 00:01:23.000 +[caption] A CORNER OF A BED-SITTER. [action] Girl in bra and pants switches on TV. + +00:01:23.000 --> 00:01:26.000 + +... whilst Mary, Roger's half-sister, settles down to watch television... + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_12_-_Just_the_Words__Episode_Twelve/9_How_far_can_a_minister_fall_.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_12_-_Just_the_Words__Episode_Twelve/9_How_far_can_a_minister_fall_.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..620527db --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_12_-_Just_the_Words__Episode_Twelve/9_How_far_can_a_minister_fall_.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,151 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Wood Party broadcast; Minister falls through the floor; rescue with 'BBC rope'; discussion panel of Roberts; Spectrum 'no' button and crushing gag. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:03.000 +[caption] A PARTY POLITICAL BROADCAST ON BEHALF OF THE WOOD PARTY + +00:00:03.000 --> 00:00:05.500 + +There now follows a Party Political Broadcast on behalf of the Wood Party. + +00:00:05.500 --> 00:00:08.500 +[caption] THE RT. HON. LAMBERT WARBECK + +00:00:08.500 --> 00:00:13.000 + +Good evening. We in the Wood Party feel very strongly that the present weak drafting of the Local Government Bill leaves a lot to be desired, and we intend to fight. + +00:00:13.000 --> 00:00:16.500 +[action] He thumps the desk and falls through the floor, screaming away. + +00:00:16.500 --> 00:00:22.000 + +Hello Helllllllllloooooooooo! [to camera] Er I, I'm afraid the minister's fallen through the Earth's crust. Er... excuse me a moment. [action] looks down [dialogue] Helloooo. + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:23.500 + +[unseen, distant] Helloooooo. + +00:00:23.500 --> 00:00:25.000 + +Are you all right minister? + +00:00:25.000 --> 00:00:27.500 + +I appear to have landed on this kind of ledge thing. + +00:00:27.500 --> 00:00:30.000 + +Shall we lower down one of the BBC ropes? + +00:00:30.000 --> 00:00:31.500 + +If you'd be so kind. + +00:00:31.500 --> 00:00:34.000 + +What length of BBC rope will we be likely to need? + +00:00:34.000 --> 00:00:36.500 + +I should use the longest BBC rope. That would be a good idea I would imagine. + +00:00:36.500 --> 00:00:40.000 + +Okey doke chief. Er, Tex get the longest BBC rope, and bring it here pronto. + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:49.000 + +[distant] In the meantime, since I am on all channels, perhaps I'd better carry on with this broadcast by shouting about our housing plans from down here as best I can. Could someone throw me down a script. [action] script drops; Tex arrives with enormous coil [dialogue] The script would appear to have landed on a different ledge somewhat out of my grasp, don't you know. + +00:00:49.000 --> 00:00:52.000 + +Er, well perhaps when the rope reaches you minister you could kind of swing over to the ledge and grab it. + +00:00:52.000 --> 00:00:53.500 + +Good idea. + +00:00:53.500 --> 00:00:56.500 +[caption] THE RT. HON. LAMBERT WARBECK [action] Minister swings on rope. + +00:00:56.500 --> 00:00:58.500 + +Well I'm going to carry on, if I can read the script. + +00:00:58.500 --> 00:01:12.000 + +Good evening. We in the Wood Party [swings away/back] feel very strongly about [swings away/back] the present weak drafting of the Local Government Bill and— no, no - it's no good, it's not working... I think I'll have to try and make a grab for it. Ah. There we are. [action] grabs script one-handed; slips and hangs upside down [dialogue] agh, agh. Oh dear. Hello! + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:13.000 + +Hello. + +00:01:13.000 --> 00:01:18.000 + +Look, look, I must look a bit of a chump hanging upside down like this. + +00:01:18.000 --> 00:01:23.000 + +Don't worry minister. I think love if we turn the picture upside down we should help the minister, then. + +00:01:23.000 --> 00:01:29.000 +[action] Picture flips; Minister appears upright. He drops script. Apologizes for 'bloody heck' on all channels. + +00:01:29.000 --> 00:01:31.000 + +There's another script on the way down minister. + +00:01:31.000 --> 00:01:40.000 + +Oh good, good. Well ... er... er... um... Good evening. Er ... well... er... how are you? Er... Oh yes look, I don't want you to think of the Wood Party as a load of old men that like hanging around on ropes only I ... er ... oh ... oh. + +00:01:40.000 --> 00:01:45.000 +[action] A man (upright) is lowered down to the minister (inverted picture logic); hands him a script and climbs away; falls past with a scream. + +00:01:45.000 --> 00:01:48.000 + +Ah. Thank you. Good evening, we in the Wood Party feel very strongly about the present weak drafting... Look. I think we'd better call it a day. + +00:01:48.000 --> 00:01:51.000 +[action] Cut to discussion set: two men named Robert. + +00:01:51.000 --> 00:01:53.000 + +Is this the furthest distance that a minister has fallen? Robert. + +00:01:53.000 --> 00:02:00.000 + +Well surprisingly not. The Canadian Minister for External Affairs fell nearly seven miles during a Liberal Conference in Ottawa about six years ago, and then quite recently the Kenyan Minister for Agric. and Fish fell nearly twelve miles during a Nairobi debate in Parliament, although this hasn't been ratified yet. + +00:02:00.000 --> 00:02:02.500 + +Er, how far did the Filipino cabinet fall last March? + +00:02:02.500 --> 00:02:06.500 + +Er, well they fell nearly thirty-nine miles but it's not really so remarkable as that was due to their combined weight, of course. Robert. + +00:02:06.500 --> 00:02:08.500 + +Thank you, Robert. Well now what's your reaction to all this, Robert? + +00:02:08.500 --> 00:02:21.000 + +Well, well Robert the main thing is that it's terribly exciting. You see the minister is quite clearly lodged between rocks we know terribly little of. Terribly little. Of course the main thing is we're getting colour pictures of an extraordinarily high quality. The important thing is, the really exciting thing is the minister will [action] begins to smoke [dialogue] be bringing back samples of the Earth's core which will give us a tremendous, really tremendous tremendous tremendous clue about the origins of the Earth and what God himself is made of. [action] he catches fire; someone douses him + +00:02:21.000 --> 00:02:24.000 + +Thank you Robert. Well that seems to be about all we have time for tonight. Unless anyone has anything else to say. Has anyone anything else to say? + +00:02:24.000 --> 00:02:30.000 +[montage] Various 'noes' and one 'bloody fairy' from this week's characters. + +00:02:30.000 --> 00:02:34.000 + +What do we mean by no, what do we mean by yes, what do we mean by no, no, no. Tonight Spectrum looks at the whole question of what is no. + +00:02:34.000 --> 00:02:38.000 +[action] Sixteen-ton weight crushes presenter. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_13/0_head_tail.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_13/0_head_tail.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..568d701f --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_13/0_head_tail.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,45 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Intro and closing credits material extracted from page prologue/epilogue. Placeholder timings autogenerated. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 +[action] Four undertakers carry a coffin. The lid opens and the 'It's' man looks out. + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:06.000 + +It's... + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:09.000 +[caption] Cut to large animated sign saying: 'Intermission'. + +00:00:09.000 --> 00:00:12.000 + +There will now be a short intermission. + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:18.000 +[action] Seven seconds of slightly speeded up Mantovani. Two animated cars race in and crash. Cut to animated opening credits. Cut back to 'Intermission' sign. + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:24.000 + +There will now be a medium-sized intermission. + +00:00:24.000 --> 00:00:28.000 +[caption] ANIMATED CAPTIONS: NOW SHOWING AT OTHER DANK CINEMAS; AT THE PORTNOY CINEMA PICCADILLY; WINNER OF THE GOLDEN PALM, TORREMOLINOS; RAINWEAR THROUGH THE AGES; COMING SOON; AT THE JODRELL CINEMA, COCKFOSTERS. + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:34.000 +[caption] The management regrets that it will not be showing a feature film this evening as it eats into the profits. + +00:00:34.000 --> 00:00:38.000 +[action] Cut to the Queen on horseback; first bars of National Anthem. + +00:00:38.000 --> 00:00:42.000 + +Well that's quite enough of that. And now a policeman near Rottingdeans ... Albatross! + +00:06:30.000 --> 00:06:36.000 +[caption] Cut to film of 'It's' man being pursued by undertaker; roll credits over. CAPTION: 'INTERMISSION'. + +00:06:36.000 --> 00:06:44.000 + +When this series returns it will be put out on Monday mornings as a test card and will be described by 'Radio Times' as a history of Irish agriculture. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_13/10_Stonehenge.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_13/10_Stonehenge.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..1d8d8c92 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_13/10_Stonehenge.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,25 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit begins at anchor #10. Placeholder timings autogenerated. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:07.000 +[action] Police dancing round Stonehenge. A burglar is bound to a stone altar. Mix to a newspaper photo of same; a chief constable reads it in his office. + +00:00:07.000 --> 00:00:12.000 + +Now this is the kind of thing that gives the police a bad name, sergeant. + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:16.000 +[action] Reveal police sergeant in a shimmering slim-fitting ladies' evening gown, diamante handbag and helmet. + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:18.000 + +I know, sir. + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:21.000 +[sfx] Intercom buzzer on desk. + +00:00:21.000 --> 00:00:24.000 + +[on intercom] Yes, Beryl? + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_13/11_Mr_Attila_the_Hun.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_13/11_Mr_Attila_the_Hun.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..037f6253 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_13/11_Mr_Attila_the_Hun.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,149 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit begins at anchor #11. Placeholder timings autogenerated. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 + +[on intercom, male voice] Attila the Hun to see you, sir. + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:06.000 + +Who? + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:08.000 + +Attila the Hun, sir. + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:13.000 + +Oh botherkins! Er, constable, go and see to him will you? + +00:00:13.000 --> 00:00:16.000 + +What! In this dress? + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:19.000 + +Oh all right, I'll go. + +00:00:19.000 --> 00:00:23.000 + +Oh, I have got a little green pinny I could wear... + +00:00:23.000 --> 00:00:27.000 + +No, no, no, I'll go. You stay here. + +00:00:27.000 --> 00:00:30.000 + +Oh goody! I can get on with the ironing. + +00:00:30.000 --> 00:00:36.000 +[action] Chief constable walks to reception. Policeman behind counter. A small, insignificant man waits. + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:38.000 + +[to policeman] Right where is he? + +00:00:38.000 --> 00:00:40.000 + +Over there, sir. + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:45.000 + +Right, er, all right sergeant leave this to me. Er, now then sir, you are Attila the Hun. + +00:00:45.000 --> 00:00:51.000 + +That's right, yes. A. T. Hun. My parents were Mr and Mrs Norman Hun, but they had a little joke when I was born. + +00:00:51.000 --> 00:00:54.000 + +Yes well, Mr Hun ... + +00:00:54.000 --> 00:00:57.000 + +Oh! Call me 'The', for heaven's sake! + +00:00:57.000 --> 00:01:01.000 + +Oh well, The... what do you want to see us about? + +00:01:01.000 --> 00:01:04.000 + +I've come to give myself up. + +00:01:04.000 --> 00:01:06.000 + +What for? + +00:01:06.000 --> 00:01:10.000 + +Looting, pillaging and sacking a major city. + +00:01:10.000 --> 00:01:12.000 + +I beg your pardon? + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:17.000 + +Looting, pillaging, sacking a major city, and I'd like nine thousand other charges to be taken into consideration, please. + +00:01:17.000 --> 00:01:24.000 + +I say, excuse me, Mr Hun. [action] He removes his moustache and replaces hat. Have you any objection to taking a breath test? + +00:01:24.000 --> 00:01:26.000 + +Oh, no. No, no, no, no. + +00:01:26.000 --> 00:01:30.000 + +Right, er, sergeant will you bring the Hunalyser, please? + +00:01:30.000 --> 00:01:33.000 +[action] The constable produces a breathalyser. + +00:01:33.000 --> 00:01:35.000 + +Here we are, sir. + +00:01:35.000 --> 00:01:37.000 +[action] Hands it to the chief constable. + +00:01:37.000 --> 00:01:39.000 + +Er, how's it work? + +00:01:39.000 --> 00:01:46.000 + +Well he breathes into it, sir, and the white crystals turn lime green. Then he is Attila the Hun, sir. + +00:01:46.000 --> 00:01:49.000 + +I see. Right. Would you mind breathing into this Mr Hun? + +00:01:49.000 --> 00:01:51.000 + +Right. [action] Blows into bag. + +00:01:51.000 --> 00:01:53.000 + +What if nothing happens, sergeant? + +00:01:53.000 --> 00:01:55.000 + +He's Alexander the Great! + +00:01:55.000 --> 00:01:59.000 + +Ha, ha! Caught you, Mr A. T. Great! + +00:01:59.000 --> 00:02:05.000 + +[now Alexander] Oh curses! Curses! I thought I was safe, disguised as Attila the Hun. + +00:02:05.000 --> 00:02:12.000 + +Oh perhaps so, but you made one fatal mistake... you see, this wasn't a Hunalyser... it was an Alexander the Greatalyser. Take him away, Beryl! + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_13/12_Psychiatry_-_silly_sketch.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_13/12_Psychiatry_-_silly_sketch.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..00e68491 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_13/12_Psychiatry_-_silly_sketch.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,169 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit begins at first anchor named #12. Placeholder timings autogenerated. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Animation link into psychiatrist's consulting room. Receptionist looks in. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:09.000 + +Dr Larch ... there's a Mr Phelps to see you. + +00:00:09.000 --> 00:00:10.500 + +Er, nurse! + +00:00:10.500 --> 00:00:12.500 + +Yes? + +00:00:12.500 --> 00:00:20.000 + +[whispering] Er, you don't think you should make it clear that I'm a psychiatrist? + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:22.500 + +What? + +00:00:22.500 --> 00:00:26.500 + +Well, I could be any type of doctor. + +00:00:26.500 --> 00:00:32.000 + +Well I can't come in and say 'Psychiatrist Larch' or 'Dr Larch who is a psychiatrist'. Oh, anyway look, it's written on the door. + +00:00:32.000 --> 00:00:35.500 + +[whispering] That's outside. + +00:00:35.500 --> 00:00:40.000 + +Well, I don't care, you'll just have to do it yourself. + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:48.000 + +[sfx] Brr brr. [action] He picks up phone. Hello. Er, no, wrong number I'm afraid, this is a psychiatrist speaking. Next please. [sfx] Knock at the door. Er, come in. + +00:00:48.000 --> 00:00:53.000 +[action] Phelps enters dressed as Napoleon, parrot on head, holding a leash to nothing. + +00:00:53.000 --> 00:00:55.000 + +Bow, wow, wow. + +00:00:55.000 --> 00:01:00.000 + +Ah Mr Phelps. Come on in, take a seat. Now what seems to be the matter? + +00:01:00.000 --> 00:01:02.000 + +No, no, no. No. No. + +00:01:02.000 --> 00:01:06.000 + +I'm sorry? + +00:01:06.000 --> 00:01:15.000 + +Oh can't you do better than that? I mean it's so predictable I've seen it a million times. Knock, knock, knock come in, ah Mr Phelps take a seat. I've seen it and seen it. + +00:01:15.000 --> 00:01:20.000 + +Well look will you please sit down and do your first line. + +00:01:20.000 --> 00:01:25.000 + +No. No. I've had enough. I've had enough. + +00:01:25.000 --> 00:01:27.000 +[action] Phelps exits. + +00:01:27.000 --> 00:01:30.000 + +I can't even get it started. + +00:01:30.000 --> 00:01:32.000 + +Albatross! + +00:01:32.000 --> 00:01:35.000 + +Shut up! Oh it drives me mad. + +00:01:35.000 --> 00:01:39.000 +[action] Cut to a man in limbo: Mr Notlob. + +00:01:39.000 --> 00:01:42.000 + +A mad psychiatrist, that'd be new. + +00:01:42.000 --> 00:01:45.000 +[action] Back to the psychiatrist. + +00:01:45.000 --> 00:01:47.000 + +Next please. + +00:01:47.000 --> 00:01:54.000 +[action] Knocking. He thumbs a thesaurus. + +00:01:54.000 --> 00:02:02.000 + +Cross the threshold, arrive, ingress, gain admittance, infiltrate. [action] Notlob enters in an ordinary suit. Ah Mr Notlob, ah park your hips, on the sitting device. + +00:02:02.000 --> 00:02:05.000 + +[to camera] It is a mad psychiatrist. + +00:02:05.000 --> 00:02:11.000 + +I'm not. I'm not. Come on in. Take a seat. What's, what's the matter? + +00:02:11.000 --> 00:02:14.000 +[action] Cut to Napoleon in limbo; he blows a raspberry. + +00:02:14.000 --> 00:02:16.000 + +Now what's the matter? + +00:02:16.000 --> 00:02:21.000 + +Well I keep hearing guitars playing and people singing when there's no one around. + +00:02:21.000 --> 00:02:33.000 + +Yes, well this is not at all uncommon. In certain mental states we find that auditory hallucinations occur which are of a most ... [listens] Is that 'We're all going to the zoo tomorrow'? + +00:02:33.000 --> 00:02:35.000 + +Yes. Yes. + +00:02:35.000 --> 00:02:37.000 + +Is it always that? + +00:02:37.000 --> 00:02:39.000 + +No. + +00:02:39.000 --> 00:02:41.000 + +Well that's something. + +00:02:41.000 --> 00:02:44.000 + +But it's mainly folk songs. + +00:02:44.000 --> 00:02:46.000 + +Oh my God. + +00:02:46.000 --> 00:02:51.000 + +Last night I had 'I'll never fall in love again' for six hours. + +00:02:51.000 --> 00:02:59.000 + +Well look, I think I'd better have a second opinion on this. I want you to see a colleague of mine, a specialist in these sort of things, who has an office very much like this one as a matter of fact. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_13/13_Operating_theatre_(squatters).vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_13/13_Operating_theatre_(squatters).vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..a31ac27b --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_13/13_Operating_theatre_(squatters).vtt @@ -0,0 +1,141 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Continuation begins at second anchor labeled #12 in source; treated as separate skit (operating theatre). Placeholder timings autogenerated. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Jump cut to similar office now a surgeon's. He doodles moustache/beard/glasses on a portrait. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:33.000 + +Brr brr... No, no wrong number I'm a colleague of his, a surgeon, who specializes in these kind of things. Yes thank you very much. Next please. [sfx] Knock. Come in. [action] Notlob enters; 'Going to the zoo' faintly heard. Ah come in, please take a seat. [flash of Napoleon] My colleague who has a similar office has explained your case to me. Mr Notlob, as you know I am a leading Harley Street surgeon as seen on television. [music] He drops the needle; Dr Kildare theme plays. I'm afraid I'm going to have to operate... [grandiose patter about hands and Pandora's box] ...So if you'll just step through here I'll slit you up a treat. + +00:00:33.000 --> 00:00:35.000 + +What? + +00:00:35.000 --> 00:00:39.000 + +Mr Notlob, there's nothing wrong with you that an expensive operation can't prolong. + +00:00:39.000 --> 00:00:46.000 +[action] Operating theatre. Notlob on table (real head, false body). Guitar still audible. Surgeon swabs. + +00:00:46.000 --> 00:00:59.000 + +Right, I'm ready to make the incision. Knife please, sister. [takes knife] What's that supposed to be. Give me a big one. [strops big knife] ... oh I do enjoy this. Right. [action] He stabs and makes a four-foot slit. Oh what a great slit. Now, gentlemen, I am going to open the slit. + +00:00:59.000 --> 00:01:03.000 +[action] He pulls it apart. The song gets louder. A squatter's head pops out. + +00:01:03.000 --> 00:01:06.000 + +Too much man, groovy, great scene. Great light show, baby. + +00:01:06.000 --> 00:01:08.000 + +What are you doing in there? + +00:01:08.000 --> 00:01:10.000 + +We're doing our own thing, man. + +00:01:10.000 --> 00:01:13.000 + +Have you got Mr Nottob's permission to be in there? + +00:01:13.000 --> 00:01:15.000 + +We're squatters, baby. + +00:01:15.000 --> 00:01:18.000 + +What? [to nurse, about Notlob] Nurse, wake him up. + +00:01:18.000 --> 00:01:20.000 +[action] She slaps his face. + +00:01:20.000 --> 00:01:24.000 + +Don't get uptight, man. Join the scene and other phrases. Money isn't real. + +00:01:24.000 --> 00:01:29.000 + +It is where I'm standing and it blows my mind, young lad. [looks inside] Good Lord! Is that a nude woman? + +00:01:29.000 --> 00:01:31.000 + +She's doing an article on us for 'Nova', man. + +00:01:31.000 --> 00:01:35.000 + +[her head appears] Hi everyone. Are you part of the scene? + +00:01:35.000 --> 00:01:38.000 + +Are you rolling your own jelly babies in there? + +00:01:38.000 --> 00:01:41.000 + +[waking] What's going on? Who are they? + +00:01:41.000 --> 00:01:43.000 + +That's what we are trying to find out. + +00:01:43.000 --> 00:01:45.000 + +What are they doing in my stomach? + +00:01:45.000 --> 00:01:48.000 + +We don't know. Are they paying you any rent? + +00:01:48.000 --> 00:01:50.000 + +Of course they're not paying me rent! + +00:01:50.000 --> 00:01:52.000 + +You're not furnished, you fascist. + +00:01:52.000 --> 00:01:54.000 + +Get them out! + +00:01:54.000 --> 00:01:55.500 + +I can't. + +00:01:55.500 --> 00:01:57.500 + +Get them out. + +00:01:57.500 --> 00:02:00.000 + +No I can't. Not, not without a court order. + +00:02:00.000 --> 00:02:02.000 + +Shut up. You're keeping us awake. + +00:02:02.000 --> 00:02:05.000 +[caption] ONE COURT ORDER LATER + +00:02:05.000 --> 00:02:10.000 +[action] Policemen walk in. + +00:02:10.000 --> 00:02:14.000 + +[into slit] You are hereby ordered to vacate Mr Notlob forthwith. And or. + +00:02:14.000 --> 00:02:16.000 + +Push off, fuzz. + +00:02:16.000 --> 00:02:20.000 + +Right, that's it, we're going in. Release the vicious dogs. [action] He dives into the slit. + +00:02:20.000 --> 00:02:28.000 +[animation] Animated character: 'What a terrible way to end a series. Why couldn't it end with something like this?' [confusing animation] 'Now there's an ending for you. Romance. Laughter.' + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_13/1_Intermissions.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_13/1_Intermissions.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..4dcab6c4 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_13/1_Intermissions.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,18 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit begins at anchor #1. Placeholder timings autogenerated. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:03.000 +[caption] Cut to large animated sign saying: 'Intermission'. + +00:00:03.000 --> 00:00:06.000 + +There will now be a short intermission. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:12.000 +[action] Slightly speeded up Mantovani plays. Two animated cars race in and crash. Cut to animated opening credits. Cut back to 'Intermission' sign. + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:18.000 + +There will now be a medium-sized intermission. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_13/2_Restaurant_(abuse_cannibalism).vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_13/2_Restaurant_(abuse_cannibalism).vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..45238a93 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_13/2_Restaurant_(abuse_cannibalism).vtt @@ -0,0 +1,197 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit begins at anchor #2. Placeholder timings autogenerated. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:05.000 +[action] Short animation, then cut to restaurant vestibule. He and She enter; She natters. Waiter waits. + +00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:18.000 + +Ooh I don't like this, Ooh I don't like that. Oh I don't think much to all this. Oh fancy using that wallpaper. Fancy using mustard. Oo is that a proper one? Oo it's not real. Oh I don't think it's a proper restaurant unless they give you finger bowls. Oo I don't like him. I'm going to have a baby in a few years. + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:26.000 + +Er, please excuse my wife. She may appear to be rather nasty but underneath she has a heart of formica. [action] The waiter grimaces. I'm sorry about that. + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:36.000 + +That's all right sir, we get all sorts of lines in here. The head waiter will be along to abuse you in a few moments, and now if you'll excuse me I have to go and commit suicide. + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:39.000 + +Oh I'm sorry. + +00:00:39.000 --> 00:00:43.000 + +It's all right. It's not because of anything serious. + +00:00:43.000 --> 00:00:47.000 +[action] He exits. Off-screen shot and scream. + +00:00:47.000 --> 00:00:57.000 + +Quite frankly I'm against people who commit suicide, I don't like that sort of person at all. I'm plain people and I'm proud of it, my mother's the salt of the earth, and I don't take the pill 'cos it's nasty. + +00:00:57.000 --> 00:01:01.000 +[action] The head waiter enters. + +00:01:01.000 --> 00:01:12.000 + +Please excuse my wife, she may not be very beautiful, and she may have no money, and she may be a little talentless, boring and dull, but on the other hand ... [pause] ... sorry I can't think of anything. + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:32.000 + +Fine. I'm the head waiter. This is a vegetarian restaurant only, we serve no animal flesh of any kind. We're not only proud of that, we're smug about it. So if you were to come in here asking me to rip open a small defenseless chicken, so you could chew its skin and eat its intestines, then I'm afraid I'd have to ask you to leave. + +00:01:32.000 --> 00:01:35.000 + +No, no, no, no. + +00:01:35.000 --> 00:01:59.000 + +Likewise if you were to ask us to slice the sides of a cow and serve it with small pieces of its liver... [action] a small tic develops as he gets carried away... or indeed drain the life blood from a pig before cutting off one of its legs... or carve the living giblets from a sheep and serve them with the fresh brains, bowels, guts and spleen of a small rabbit... WE WOULDN'T DO IT. [reaction] Not for food anyway. + +00:01:59.000 --> 00:02:14.000 + +Quite frankly I'm against people who give vent to their loquacity by extraneous bombastic circumlocution. [action] They both look at her; pause. Oh I don't like that. + +00:02:14.000 --> 00:02:19.000 + +Sometimes Shirley I think you're almost human. + +00:02:19.000 --> 00:02:23.000 + +[aside] Do you know I still wet my bed? + +00:02:23.000 --> 00:02:28.000 + +Once I married someone who was beautiful, and young, and gay, and free. Whatever happened to her? + +00:02:28.000 --> 00:02:31.000 + +You divorced her and married me. + +00:02:31.000 --> 00:02:36.000 + +I met my second wife at a second-wife-swapping party. Trust me to arrive late. + +00:02:36.000 --> 00:02:40.000 +[action] Enter headmaster. + +00:02:40.000 --> 00:02:44.000 + +Always were late weren't you Thompson? + +00:02:44.000 --> 00:02:48.000 + +Hello Headmaster. What are you doing here? + +00:02:48.000 --> 00:03:13.000 + +Fine, fine, fine, thank you. Fine, thank you. No more sherry for me don't you know. Warner House beat Badger House for the Second Cuppa, remarkable. We had to put most of the second form to sleep. No padre. Bad business. They were beginning to play with themselves. Still... You haven't seen my wife anywhere have you? + +00:03:13.000 --> 00:03:15.000 + +No. + +00:03:15.000 --> 00:03:19.000 + +Oh thank God for that. + +00:03:19.000 --> 00:03:30.000 + +Oh I don't like him. Do you know what I mean. Do you know what I mean. I mean do you know what I mean. Do you know what I mean. Do you know what I mean. I mean do you know what I mean. All men are the same. + +00:03:30.000 --> 00:03:36.000 +[action] Enter Prologue in long white Greek robes, long white beard, holding a large staff. + +00:03:36.000 --> 00:03:46.000 + +Imagine not that these four walls contain the Mighty Owl of Thebes. For, gentles all, beauty sits most closely to them it can construe... + +00:03:46.000 --> 00:03:48.000 + +No it doesn't. + +00:03:48.000 --> 00:03:51.000 + +Sorry. + +00:03:51.000 --> 00:03:56.000 + +Fine. Would you care for a glass of blood? Oh what a giveaway. + +00:03:56.000 --> 00:04:03.000 + +No, we'd like to see the menu please. I don't think it's a proper restaurant unless you have a proper menu and anyway I might be pregnant. + +00:04:03.000 --> 00:04:06.000 + +Perhaps you'd care for a drink? + +00:04:06.000 --> 00:04:11.000 + +Ever since you've married me, Douglas, you've treated me like an albatross. + +00:04:11.000 --> 00:04:16.000 +[action] A waiter enters pushing a large serving dish with a semi-naked Hopkins sitting unconcernedly in it. + +00:04:16.000 --> 00:04:18.000 + +Evening. + +00:04:18.000 --> 00:04:20.000 + +Good evening. + +00:04:20.000 --> 00:04:26.000 + +I hope you're going to enjoy me this evening. I'm the special. Try me with some rice. + +00:04:26.000 --> 00:04:28.000 + +I beg your pardon? + +00:04:28.000 --> 00:04:31.000 + +A Hopkins au gratin a la chef. + +00:04:31.000 --> 00:04:36.000 + +Ah, oh how do you... [action] He makes to shake hands. + +00:04:36.000 --> 00:04:40.000 + +[skittishly] Don't play with your food. + +00:04:40.000 --> 00:04:49.000 + +[examining him] I don't like that. There's dust on here. I don't think it's a proper meal without a pudding. My husband's an architect. + +00:04:49.000 --> 00:05:01.000 + +Oh, one word of warning, sir, a little tip. [lowers voice] Don't have any of the vicar over there. [caption] Cut to vicar sitting thin and unhappy in a pot. He's been here two weeks and nobody's touched him. 'Nuff said? + +00:05:01.000 --> 00:05:03.000 + +Yes thank you. + +00:05:03.000 --> 00:05:07.000 + +Well I must get along or I'll spoil. Janet - to the kitchen. + +00:05:07.000 --> 00:05:10.000 + +There's a dead bishop in the lobby, sir. + +00:05:10.000 --> 00:05:15.000 + +I don't know who keeps bringing them in here. + +00:05:15.000 --> 00:05:35.000 + +Oh I don't like that. I think it's silly. It's not a proper sketch without a proper punchline. I mean I don't know much about anything, I'm stupid. I'm muggins. Nobody cares what I think. I'm always the one that has to do everything. Nobody cares about me. Well I'm going to have a lot of bloody babies and they can bloody well care about me. Makes you sick half this television. They never stop talking, he'll be the ruination of her, rhythm method. + +00:05:35.000 --> 00:05:38.000 +[caption] Cut to animated sign saying 'Intermission'. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_13/3_Advertisements.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_13/3_Advertisements.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..9eeb818a --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_13/3_Advertisements.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,22 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit begins at anchor #3. Placeholder timings autogenerated. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:07.000 + +There will now be a whopping great intermission, during which small ice creams in very large boxes will be sold. Another way we can drive people away from the cinema is by showing you advertisements. + +00:00:07.000 --> 00:00:11.000 +[caption] Intermission changes to adverts. Animated title: 'Pearls For Swine Presents'. + +00:00:11.000 --> 00:00:22.000 + +Do you like this? Or how about this? Or perhaps you prefer this latest model. Then why not come to us. We supply only the very best models. + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:43.000 + +After the show why not visit the La Gondola Restaurant. Just two minutes from this performance. The manager Mr Luigi Vercotti will be pleased to welcome you and introduce you to a wide variety of famous Sicilian delicacies. [action] As Vercotti poses for the camera policemen bundle his staff and several half-dressed girls through and out of the restaurant. Here you can relax in comfort in friendly surroundings. Or if you wish, you may drink and dance till midnight. At the La Gondola Restaurant you can sample all the spicy pleasures of the Mediterranean. The head waiter will be pleased to show you his specialities. Or why not ask the cook for something really hot? [action] Police remove a chef carrying an 8mm projector and film. Yes, for an evening you will never forget - it's the La Gondola Restaurant, Chelsea, Parkhurst, Dartmoor and the Scrubs. [action] Police remove Mr Vercotti. + +00:00:43.000 --> 00:00:47.000 +[caption] 'Pearls for Swine' closing title. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_13/4_Albatross.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_13/4_Albatross.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..b08c3ebc --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_13/4_Albatross.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,57 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit begins at anchor #4. Placeholder timings autogenerated. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Corner of cinema. A man in an ice-cream girl's uniform stands in a spotlight with an ice-cream tray with an albatross on it. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:10.000 + +Albatross! Albatross! Albatross! + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:12.000 +[action] A customer approaches. + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:15.000 + +Two choc-ices please. + +00:00:15.000 --> 00:00:20.000 + +I haven't got choc-ices. I only got the albatross. Albatross! + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:23.000 + +What flavour is it? + +00:00:23.000 --> 00:00:30.000 + +It's a bird, innit? It's a bloody sea bird... it's not any bloody flavour. Albatross! + +00:00:30.000 --> 00:00:33.000 + +Do you get wafers with it? + +00:00:33.000 --> 00:00:37.000 + +Course you don't get bloody wafers with it. Albatross! + +00:00:37.000 --> 00:00:39.000 + +How much is it? + +00:00:39.000 --> 00:00:41.000 + +Ninepence. + +00:00:41.000 --> 00:00:44.000 + +I'll have two please. + +00:00:44.000 --> 00:00:47.000 + +Gannet on a stick. + +00:00:47.000 --> 00:00:53.000 +[caption] Camera zooms back to the screen. 'Intermission' sign appears. It explodes. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_13/5_Come_back_to_my_place.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_13/5_Come_back_to_my_place.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..cc8f0de4 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_13/5_Come_back_to_my_place.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,42 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit begins at anchor #5. Placeholder timings autogenerated. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:05.000 +[action] Policeman standing in a street; a man approaches. + +00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:07.000 + +Inspector, inspector. + +00:00:07.000 --> 00:00:09.000 + +Uh huh. + +00:00:09.000 --> 00:00:18.000 + +I'm terribly sorry but I was sitting on a park bench over there, took my coat off for a minute and then I found my wallet had been stolen and £15 taken from it. + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:24.000 + +Well did you er, did you see anyone take it, anyone hanging around or... + +00:00:24.000 --> 00:00:28.000 + +No no, there was no one there at all. That's the trouble. + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:32.000 + +Well there's not very much we can do about that, sir. + +00:00:32.000 --> 00:00:36.000 + +Do you want to come back to my place? + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:39.000 + +... Yeah all right. + +00:00:39.000 --> 00:00:42.000 +[caption] Women's Institute applauding. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_13/6_Me_Doctor.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_13/6_Me_Doctor.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..002fc59c --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_13/6_Me_Doctor.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,92 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit begins at anchor #6. Placeholder timings autogenerated. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 +[action] Man on a bench in casualty ward set. + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:06.000 + +Albatross + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:09.000 +[action] Doctor and Sister enter and approach him. + +00:00:09.000 --> 00:00:11.000 + +Mr. Burtenshaw? + +00:00:11.000 --> 00:00:13.000 + +Me, Doctor? + +00:00:13.000 --> 00:00:17.000 + +No, me doctor, you Mr. Burtenshaw. + +00:00:17.000 --> 00:00:19.000 + +My wife, doctor? + +00:00:19.000 --> 00:00:23.000 + +No, your wife patient, me Doctor. + +00:00:23.000 --> 00:00:25.000 + +Come this way please. + +00:00:25.000 --> 00:00:27.000 + +Me, Sister? + +00:00:27.000 --> 00:00:31.000 + +No. She Sister. Me Doctor. You Mr. Burtenshaw. + +00:00:31.000 --> 00:00:33.000 +[action] Nurse enters. + +00:00:33.000 --> 00:00:35.000 + +Doctor Walters? + +00:00:35.000 --> 00:00:41.000 + +Me, Nurse. [to Sister] You Mr. Burtenshaw. [to Man] She Sister. You Doctor. [to Nurse] + +00:00:41.000 --> 00:00:43.000 + +No, doctor. + +00:00:43.000 --> 00:00:46.000 + +No Doctor? Call ambulance. Keep warm. + +00:00:46.000 --> 00:00:48.000 + +Drink, doctor? + +00:00:48.000 --> 00:00:53.000 + +Drink doctor. Eat Sister. Cook Mr. Burtenshaw. Nurse me. + +00:00:53.000 --> 00:00:55.000 + +You, doctor? + +00:00:55.000 --> 00:01:00.000 + +Me Doctor. You Mr. Burtenshaw. She Nurse. + +00:01:00.000 --> 00:01:02.000 + +But my wife, Nurse. + +00:01:02.000 --> 00:01:15.000 + +Your wife not nurse. She Nurse. Your wife patient. Be patient. She Nurse. Your wife. Me doctor. Yew Tree. U-trecht. U-trillo, U Thant, Euphemism. Me Doctor. [action] A knight walks in quickly and hits him over the head with a chicken. Albatross! + +00:01:15.000 --> 00:01:18.000 +[caption] Women's Institute applaud. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_13/7_Historical_impersonations.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_13/7_Historical_impersonations.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..7aa9df0e --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_13/7_Historical_impersonations.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,107 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit begins at anchor #7. Placeholder timings autogenerated. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 +[action] Film of Gumbys (vox pop). + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:08.000 + +I would like to meet someone of superior intelligence. + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:12.000 + +I would like to hear the sound of two bricks being bashed together. + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:17.000 + +I would like to see John the Babtist's impersonation of Graham Hill. + +00:00:17.000 --> 00:00:23.000 +[action] Cut to glittery linkman set. Showbiz music and applause. + +00:00:23.000 --> 00:00:30.000 + +Yes, it's Historical Impersonations. When you in the present can make those in the past stars of the future. And here is your host for tonight - Wally Wiggin. + +00:00:30.000 --> 00:00:34.000 +[caption] CAPTION: 'HISTORICAL IMPERSONATIONS'. [action] Fade applause and music. + +00:00:34.000 --> 00:00:42.000 + +Hello, good evening and welcome to Historical Impersonations. And we kick off tonight with Cardinal Richelieu and his impersonation of Petula Clark. + +00:00:42.000 --> 00:00:47.000 +[action] Cut to Cardinal Richelieu; he mimes. + +00:00:47.000 --> 00:00:52.000 + +'Don't sleep in the subway darling and don't stand in the pouring rain'. + +00:00:52.000 --> 00:00:55.000 +[caption] Vast applause. + +00:00:55.000 --> 00:01:02.000 + +Cardinal Richelieu - sixteen stone of pure man. And now your favourite Roman Emperor Julius Caesar as Eddie Waring. + +00:01:02.000 --> 00:01:07.000 +[action] Cut to Caesar; cloud effects behind. + +00:01:07.000 --> 00:01:13.000 + +[in Waring voice] Tota gallia divisa est in tres partes Wigan, Hunslett and Hull Kingston Rovers. + +00:01:13.000 --> 00:01:20.000 + +Well done indeed, Julius Caesar, a smile, a conquest and a dagger up your strap. Our next challenger comes all the way from the Crimea. It's the very lovely Florence Nightingale as Brian London. + +00:01:20.000 --> 00:01:30.000 +[action] Florence Nightingale stands with a lamp, simpering. A boxing bell goes; she is hit with a glove and falls flat. Cut back to Wiggin. + +00:01:30.000 --> 00:01:40.000 + +And now for our most ambitious attempt tonight - all the way from Moscow in the USS of R - Ivan the Terrible as a sales assistant in Freeman, Hardy and Willis. + +00:01:40.000 --> 00:01:46.000 +[action] In a shoe department, Ivan splits a mannequin with an immense two-handed sword. + +00:01:46.000 --> 00:01:50.000 + +And now W. G. Grace as a music box. + +00:01:50.000 --> 00:01:56.000 +[animation] Still picture of W. G. Grace; his head slowly revolves as Swiss-type music plays. + +00:01:56.000 --> 00:02:01.000 + +And now it's France's turn. One of their top statesmen, Napoleon as the R101 disaster. + +00:02:01.000 --> 00:02:09.000 +[action] Sky background; Napoleon traverses on a wire holding small propellers; sign 'R101' hangs. Marseillaise plays. An explosion as he exits. + +00:02:09.000 --> 00:02:12.000 + +And now it's request time. + +00:02:12.000 --> 00:02:16.000 + +I would like to see John the Baptist's impersonation of Graham Hill. + +00:02:16.000 --> 00:02:23.000 +[action] A head on a platter is pulled by string across the floor, making 'brm, brm' noises; it has Graham Hill moustache. Women's Institute applaud. + +00:02:23.000 --> 00:02:28.000 + +And now a short intermission during which Marcel Marceau will impersonate a man walking against the wind. + +00:02:28.000 --> 00:02:33.000 +[action] Marcel Marceau walks against the wind. + +00:02:33.000 --> 00:02:38.000 + +And now Marcel will mime a man being struck about the head by a sixteen-ton weight. + +00:02:38.000 --> 00:02:43.000 +[action] He starts the mime; a sixteen-ton weight drops on his head. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_13/8_Quiz_programme_-_'Wishes'.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_13/8_Quiz_programme_-_'Wishes'.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..4da17683 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_13/8_Quiz_programme_-_'Wishes'.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,107 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit begins at anchor #8. Placeholder timings autogenerated. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:03.000 +[action] Cut to interviewer with two small boys. + +00:00:03.000 --> 00:00:07.000 + +[gently] What's your name? + +00:00:07.000 --> 00:00:09.000 + +Eric. + +00:00:09.000 --> 00:00:14.000 + +Would you like to have a sixteen-ton weight dropped on top of you, Eric? + +00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:16.000 + +Don't know. + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:18.000 +[caption] Brief stock shot of theatre audience applauding. + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:20.000 + +How about you? + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:22.000 + +I want to have. + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:24.000 + +What do you want to have? + +00:00:24.000 --> 00:00:28.000 + +I want to have... I want to have Racquel Welch dropped on top of me. + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:30.000 + +Dropped on top of you. + +00:00:30.000 --> 00:00:33.000 + +Oh yes, not climbing. + +00:00:33.000 --> 00:00:35.000 + +She's got a big bottom. + +00:00:35.000 --> 00:00:38.000 +[caption] Applause stock shot. Cut to interviewer and two city gents (on their knees). + +00:00:38.000 --> 00:00:40.000 + +And what's your name? + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:42.000 + +Trevor Atkinson. + +00:00:42.000 --> 00:00:45.000 + +And how old are you, Trevor? + +00:00:45.000 --> 00:00:47.000 + +I'm forty-two. + +00:00:47.000 --> 00:00:49.000 +[caption] Applause stock shot. + +00:00:49.000 --> 00:00:54.000 + +[to other city gent] Are you a friend of Trevor's? + +00:00:54.000 --> 00:00:58.000 + +Yes, we're all colleagues from the Empire and General Insurance Company. + +00:00:58.000 --> 00:01:01.000 + +And what do you do? + +00:01:01.000 --> 00:01:07.000 + +Well I deal mainly with mortgage protection policies, but I also do certain types of life assurance. + +00:01:07.000 --> 00:01:14.000 + +Now if you and your pal had one big wish, Trevor, what would you like to see on television? + +00:01:14.000 --> 00:01:18.000 + +I'd like to see more fairy stories about the police. + +00:01:18.000 --> 00:01:21.000 +[action] Fairy godmother trips lightly into shot. + +00:01:21.000 --> 00:01:24.000 + +And so you shall. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_13/9_'Probe-around'_on_crime.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_13/9_'Probe-around'_on_crime.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..53fd201e --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_13/9_'Probe-around'_on_crime.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,61 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit begins at anchor #9. Placeholder timings autogenerated. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[caption] 'Panorama' music and still photos of policemen in tutus. CAPTION: 'PROBE AROUND'. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:10.000 + +Yes, tonight 'Probe Around' takes a look at crime... + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:14.000 +[action] A shot rings out; he slumps backward. A second interviewer runs in with smoking gun, pushes the first off the chair. + +00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:32.000 + +I'm sorry about that, but I always introduce this programme, not him. Yes, tonight 'Probe Around' takes a look at Crime. Is it true that the police are using dachshunds to combat the crime wave? And can the head of the Vice Squad turn himself into an albatross whenever he wants to? Just what are the police up to? + +00:00:32.000 --> 00:00:37.000 +[action] Close-up of a constable reading a big book. He is very, very, very stupid. + +00:00:37.000 --> 00:00:41.000 + +Oh, I'm up to page 39, where Peter Pan first manifests himself. + +00:00:41.000 --> 00:00:45.000 +[action] Cut back to studio. + +00:00:45.000 --> 00:00:50.000 + +With me now is Inspector Harry H 'Snapper' Organs of 'H' Division. + +00:00:50.000 --> 00:00:52.000 + +Good evening. + +00:00:52.000 --> 00:00:56.000 +[action] Cross-cut interview setup with a Viking seated beside Organs. + +00:00:56.000 --> 00:01:01.000 + +Er, Inspector, I believe you are encouraging magic in the Police Force? + +00:01:01.000 --> 00:01:20.000 + +That is correct. [action] He sticks pins into a model of a burglar as he speaks. The criminal mind is a strange and contorted one. Good evening. The mind is subject to severe mental stresses. Good evening. Guilt fears abound, good evening. In the subconscious in this state, one of our lads, with a fair training in the black arts can scare the fertilizer out of them. + +00:01:20.000 --> 00:01:34.000 + +Just how are the police combating the increase with the use of the occult? Ex-King Zog of Albania reports ... [sfx] phone rings ... Well we seem to have lost ex-King Zog there, but who cares. Just what kinds of magic are the police introducing into their crime prevention techniques? + +00:01:34.000 --> 00:01:42.000 +[action] Four chief constables huddle round an Ouija board; the tumbler moves slowly: U-P Y-O-U-R-S. + +00:01:42.000 --> 00:01:46.000 + +Up yours? What a rude Ouija board! + +00:01:46.000 --> 00:01:58.000 +[action] Montage: a policeman with wand makes illegally parked cars disappear; another waves a wand to help an old lady jump across the road; five policemen on broomsticks fly past to a siren. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_14_-_Episode_Fourteen/0_Episode14_head_tail.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_14_-_Episode_Fourteen/0_Episode14_head_tail.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..ad10d59c --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_14_-_Episode_Fourteen/0_Episode14_head_tail.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,44 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Intro and end credits compiled from opening and closing segments. Timings are placeholders. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 +[action] A man in evening dress sits in a cage at the zoo. + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:07.500 + +And now for something completely different. + +00:00:07.500 --> 00:00:10.500 +[action] Pan to show 'It's' Man in next cage. + +00:00:10.500 --> 00:00:12.500 + +It's… + +00:00:12.500 --> 00:00:17.000 +[action] Animated titles. + +00:24:00.000 --> 00:24:05.000 +[action] Suburban street clears. Freeze frame on empty street. + +00:24:05.000 --> 00:24:12.000 +[action] An enormous hedgehog, higher than the houses, enters. + +00:24:12.000 --> 00:24:16.000 + +Dinsdale? + +00:24:16.000 --> 00:24:28.000 +[caption] Roll credits over scenes of the enormous hedgehog in various London locations. + +00:24:28.000 --> 00:24:34.000 +[action] Cut back to John in cage as in opening. + +00:24:34.000 --> 00:24:38.000 + +Well, that's all for now and so until next week… [roars] + +00:24:38.000 --> 00:24:42.000 +[action] Pan to next cage to show skeleton of 'It's' Man. Fade out. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_14_-_Episode_Fourteen/1_Face_the_Press.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_14_-_Episode_Fourteen/1_Face_the_Press.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..6c63bf66 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_14_-_Episode_Fourteen/1_Face_the_Press.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,37 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit starts at anchor #1. Timings are placeholders, sequential. + +00:02:00.000 --> 00:02:03.000 +[caption] FACE THE PRESS + +00:02:03.000 --> 00:02:28.000 + +Hello. Tonight on 'Face the Press' we're going to examine two different views of contemporary things. On my left is the Minister for Home Affairs [action: cut to minister in outrageous drag and a moustache] who is wearing a striking organza dress in pink tulle, with matching pearls and a diamante collar necklace. [caption: soft fashion-parade music starts] The shoes are in brushed pigskin with gold clasps, by Maxwell of Bond Street. The hair is by Roger, and the whole ensemble is crowned by a spectacular display of Christmas orchids. And on my right - putting the case against the Government - is a small patch of brown liquid … [action: cut to patch of liquid on seat of chair] which could be creosote or some extract used in industrial varnishing. [action: cut back to interviewer] Good evening. Minister, may I put the first question to you? In your plan, 'A Better Britain For Us', you claimed that you would build 88,000 million, billion houses a year in the Greater London area alone. In fact, you've built only three in the last fifteen years. Are you a bit disappointed with this result? + +00:02:28.000 --> 00:02:40.000 + +No, no. I'd like to answer this question if I may in two ways. Firstly in my normal voice and then in a kind of silly high-pitched whine… You see housing is a problem really… + +00:02:40.000 --> 00:02:45.000 +[action] Cut back to the interviewer. The minister drones on in the background. [caption] Soft fashion-parade music resumes. + +00:02:45.000 --> 00:03:11.000 + +Well, while the minister is answering this question I'd just like to point out the minister's dress has been made entirely by hand from over three hundred pieces of Arabian shot silk [caption: minister’s high-pitched whine under fashion music] especially created for the minister by Vargar's of Paris. The low slim-line has been cut off-the-shoulder to heighten the effect of the minister's fine bone structure. Well I think the minister is coming to the end of his answer now so let's go back over and join the discussion. Thank you very much minister. Today saw the appointment of a new head of… + +00:03:11.000 --> 00:03:14.000 + +Don't I say any more? + +00:03:14.000 --> 00:03:24.000 + +No fear! Today saw the appointment of a new head of Allied Bomber Command - Air Chief Marshal Sir Vincent 'Kill the Japs' Forster. He's in our Birmingham studio… + +00:03:24.000 --> 00:03:30.000 +[action] Cut to close-up of Sir Vincent in outrageous drag on a chaise-longue, a small boy fanning him. + +00:03:30.000 --> 00:03:35.000 + +Hello Sailors! Listen, guess what. The Minister of Aviation has made me head of the RAF Ola Pola. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_14_-_Episode_Fourteen/2_New_cooker_sketch.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_14_-_Episode_Fourteen/2_New_cooker_sketch.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..9571aa9a --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_14_-_Episode_Fourteen/2_New_cooker_sketch.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,409 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit starts at anchor #2. Timings are placeholders, sequential. + +00:05:00.000 --> 00:05:08.000 +[action] Zoom out: Sir Vincent’s image is a TV set in a G-plan living room. Mrs Pinnet watches. Doorbell rings. She switches off TV and answers. + +00:05:08.000 --> 00:05:14.000 +[action] At the door stands a man in absurd attire, leading a goat with a hat. + +00:05:14.000 --> 00:05:16.500 + +Hello. Mrs Rogers? + +00:05:16.500 --> 00:05:19.500 + +No. Ooh I must be in the wrong house, + +00:05:19.500 --> 00:05:30.000 +[action] She shuts the door, crosses room, climbs out window, scrambles over wall into next door, into window. Another sitting-room; TV still shows Sir Vincent. + +00:05:30.000 --> 00:05:35.000 + +So from now on we're going to do things my way. For a start David Hockney is going to design the bombs. And I've seen the plans… + +00:05:35.000 --> 00:05:38.000 +[action] Doorbell rings. + +00:05:38.000 --> 00:05:41.000 + +That must be the new gas cooker. + +00:05:41.000 --> 00:05:47.000 +[caption] Thunderous epic music. [caption] NEW COOKER SKETCH (stone lettering). [action] Caption and music cut off as she opens door to two gas men with a cooker. + +00:05:47.000 --> 00:05:50.000 + +Morning. Mrs G. Crump? + +00:05:50.000 --> 00:05:52.500 + +No - Mrs G. Pinnet. + +00:05:52.500 --> 00:05:55.500 + +This is 46 Egernon Crescent? + +00:05:55.500 --> 00:05:58.500 + +No - Road. Egernon Road. + +00:05:58.500 --> 00:06:04.000 + +[action] First Gas Man checks a bit of paper] Road, yes, says here. Yeah. Right, could I speak to Mrs G. Crump please? + +00:06:04.000 --> 00:06:08.000 + +Oh there's nobody here of that name. It's Mrs G. Pinnet. 46 Egernon Road. + +00:06:08.000 --> 00:06:11.000 + +Well it says 'Crump' here. Don't it, Harry? + +00:06:11.000 --> 00:06:13.000 + +Yeah - it's on the invoice. + +00:06:13.000 --> 00:06:15.000 + +Yeah, definitely Crump. + +00:06:15.000 --> 00:06:20.000 + +Well there must have been a mistake, because the address is right, and that's definitely the cooker I ordered - a blue and white CookEasi. + +00:06:20.000 --> 00:06:23.000 + +Well you can't have this. This is Crump. + +00:06:23.000 --> 00:06:26.000 + +Oh dear, what are we going to do? + +00:06:26.000 --> 00:06:33.000 + +Well I don't know. What we can do for you is take it back to the Depot, get a transfer slip from Crump to Pinnet, and put it on a special delivery. + +00:06:33.000 --> 00:06:37.000 + +Yeah - that's best. We'll special it for you, we'll get it down there today and you'll get it back in ten weeks. + +00:06:37.000 --> 00:06:40.000 + +Ten weeks! Blimey, can't you just leave this one? + +00:06:40.000 --> 00:06:43.000 + +What this? What leave it here? [caption] Gas men are thunderstruck. + +00:06:43.000 --> 00:06:44.500 + +Yes. + +00:06:44.500 --> 00:06:47.500 + +Well I dunno. I suppose we could. + +00:06:47.500 --> 00:06:50.500 + +Oh, but she'd have to fill out a temporary despatch note. + +00:06:50.500 --> 00:06:53.000 + +Yeah we could leave it on a temporary despatch note. + +00:06:53.000 --> 00:06:56.000 + +Well that's sorted out then. What a mess, isn't it. + +00:06:56.000 --> 00:06:59.000 + +I know, it's ridiculous really, but there you are. Glad we could be of such a help. Right, would you sign it down there please, Mrs Crump? + +00:06:59.000 --> 00:07:00.500 + +Pinnet. + +00:07:00.500 --> 00:07:05.000 + +Pinnet. Listen, just for the books make it a bit easier, could you sign it Crump-Pinnet. + +00:07:05.000 --> 00:07:07.000 + +Right. [action] She signs. + +00:07:07.000 --> 00:07:13.000 + +Right. Thank you very much, dear. The cooker's yours. Right. Thank you very much, dear. Right. [action] They push it just inside the door and move off] Sorry about the bother… but there you are … you know … cheerio! + +00:07:13.000 --> 00:07:15.000 + +Cheerio, Mrs Crump! + +00:07:15.000 --> 00:07:18.000 + +Heh, excuse me! Cooey! Er, can you put it in the kitchen? + +00:07:18.000 --> 00:07:20.000 + +[returns] You what? + +00:07:20.000 --> 00:07:23.000 + +Well I can't cook on it unless it's connected up. + +00:07:23.000 --> 00:07:26.000 + +Oh we didn't realize you had an installation invoice. + +00:07:26.000 --> 00:07:27.500 + +An MI. + +00:07:27.500 --> 00:07:30.000 + +No, we can't touch it without an MI, you see. + +00:07:30.000 --> 00:07:31.500 + +Or an R16. + +00:07:31.500 --> 00:07:34.000 + +[action] Third Gas Man is suddenly revealed] If it's a special. + +00:07:34.000 --> 00:07:36.000 + +Nah - it's not special … the special's back at the Depot. + +00:07:36.000 --> 00:07:38.500 + +No, the special's the same as installation invoice. + +00:07:38.500 --> 00:07:40.500 + +So it's an R16. + +00:07:40.500 --> 00:07:42.500 + +What's an installation invoice? + +00:07:42.500 --> 00:07:44.500 + +A pink form from Reading. + +00:07:44.500 --> 00:07:49.000 + +Oh - we wondered what that was. Now these are the forms. [action] She produces a large wad of papers, finds a pink form, hands it over. + +00:07:49.000 --> 00:07:52.000 + +That's the one, love. Yeah, this should be all I need. Hang on. This is for Pinnet. Mrs G. Pinnet. + +00:07:52.000 --> 00:07:54.000 + +That's right. I'm Mrs G. Pinnet. + +00:07:54.000 --> 00:07:56.500 + +Well we've got Crump-Pinnet on the invoice. + +00:07:56.500 --> 00:07:59.000 + +Well shall I sign it Crump-Pinnet then? + +00:07:59.000 --> 00:08:01.000 + +No, no, no - not an MI - no. + +00:08:01.000 --> 00:08:03.000 + +No - that's from Area Service at Reading. + +00:08:03.000 --> 00:08:05.000 + +[action] Fourth Gas Man suddenly revealed] No, Cheltenham isn't it? + +00:08:05.000 --> 00:08:07.000 + +No, not this side of the street. + +00:08:07.000 --> 00:08:09.500 + +Look I just want it connected up. + +00:08:09.500 --> 00:08:11.500 +[caption] The gas men all look doubtful. + +00:08:11.500 --> 00:08:13.500 + +What about London Office? + +00:08:13.500 --> 00:08:15.500 + +Well they haven't got the machinery. + +00:08:15.500 --> 00:08:16.800 + +Not now. + +00:08:16.800 --> 00:08:19.000 + +[action] Fifth Gas Man suddenly revealed] What! The Hounslow Depot? + +00:08:19.000 --> 00:08:21.000 + +No - they're still on standard pressure. + +00:08:21.000 --> 00:08:22.500 + +Same with Twickenham. + +00:08:22.500 --> 00:08:25.500 + +But surely they can connect up a gas cooker? + +00:08:25.500 --> 00:08:28.500 + +Oh yeah, we could connect it up, love, but not unless it's an emergency. + +00:08:28.500 --> 00:08:30.500 + +But this is an emergency. + +00:08:30.500 --> 00:08:35.000 + +No it's not. An emergency is 290… 'where there is actual or apparent loss of combustible gaseous substances'. + +00:08:35.000 --> 00:08:36.500 + +Yeah, it's like a leak. + +00:08:36.500 --> 00:08:38.500 + +[action] Seventh Gas Man is revealed] Yeah, or a 478. + +00:08:38.500 --> 00:08:40.000 + +No - that's valve adjustment. + +00:08:40.000 --> 00:08:43.000 + +But there can't be a leak unless you've connected it up. + +00:08:43.000 --> 00:08:44.500 + +No, quite. We'd have to turn it on. + +00:08:44.500 --> 00:08:47.000 + +Well can't you turn it on and connect it up? + +00:08:47.000 --> 00:08:54.000 + +No. But what we can do, and this is between you and me, I shouldn't really be telling you this, we'll turn your gas on, make a hole in your pipe, you ring Hounslow emergency, they'll be around here in a couple of days. + +00:08:54.000 --> 00:08:57.000 + +What, a house full of gas! I'll be dead by then + +00:08:57.000 --> 00:08:59.500 + +Oh well, in that case you'd have the South East Area Manager round here like a shot. + +00:08:59.500 --> 00:09:01.000 + +Really? + +00:09:01.000 --> 00:09:05.000 + +Ah yes. 'One or more persons overcome by fumes', you'd have Head Office, Holborn, round here. + +00:09:05.000 --> 00:09:06.500 + +Really? + +00:09:06.500 --> 00:09:08.500 + +Yes. That's murder you see. + +00:09:08.500 --> 00:09:10.000 + +Or suicide. + +00:09:10.000 --> 00:09:11.500 + +No. That's S42. + +00:09:11.500 --> 00:09:13.000 + +Oh. + +00:09:13.000 --> 00:09:15.000 + +[action] Eighth Gas Man revealed] Still? I thought it was Hainault. + +00:09:15.000 --> 00:09:17.500 + +No - Central area and Southall Marketing Division, they're both on the S42 now. + +00:09:17.500 --> 00:09:19.500 + +And they'd be able to connect it up? + +00:09:19.500 --> 00:09:21.500 + +Oh - they'd do the lot for you, love. + +00:09:21.500 --> 00:09:23.500 + +And they'd come round this afternoon? + +00:09:23.500 --> 00:09:26.000 + +… Well what is it now… 11:30… murder… they'll be round here by two. + +00:09:26.000 --> 00:09:27.500 + +Oh well that's wonderful. + +00:09:27.500 --> 00:09:29.500 + +Oh well, right love, if you'd like to lie down here. + +00:09:29.500 --> 00:09:31.000 + +All right. [action] She lies down. + +00:09:31.000 --> 00:09:32.500 + +Okay Harry. + +00:09:32.500 --> 00:09:34.000 + +Okay. Gas on. + +00:09:34.000 --> 00:09:38.000 + +[action] Holding a gas pipe to her mouth] Right, deep breaths love. Ring Head Office would you Norman… + +00:09:38.000 --> 00:09:40.000 + +Shall I go through maintenance? + +00:09:40.000 --> 00:09:42.000 + +No, you'd better go through Deptford maintenance. + +00:09:42.000 --> 00:09:43.500 + +Peckham's on a 207 …. . + +00:09:43.500 --> 00:09:49.000 + +… that's Lewisham. What about Tottenham? No that would be a 5.4.. what about Lewisham? It's central isn't it? Or Ruislip… + +00:09:49.000 --> 00:09:55.000 +[action] Camera pans along an ever-growing line of gas men muttering incomprehensible technicalities; the line stretches out the door and into the street. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_14_-_Episode_Fourteen/3_Tobacconists_(prostitute_advert).vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_14_-_Episode_Fourteen/3_Tobacconists_(prostitute_advert).vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..7c2d7cef --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_14_-_Episode_Fourteen/3_Tobacconists_(prostitute_advert).vtt @@ -0,0 +1,83 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit starts at anchor #3. Timings are placeholders. + +00:12:00.000 --> 00:12:08.000 +[action] Animation brings us to a close-up on a small ad on a newsagent's door. A shabby man scans ads with a reflex wink, then approaches the counter. + +00:12:08.000 --> 00:12:10.000 + +Good morning. + +00:12:10.000 --> 00:12:12.000 + +Good morning, sir. Can I help you? + +00:12:12.000 --> 00:12:14.000 + +Help me? Yeah, I'll say you can help me. + +00:12:14.000 --> 00:12:15.500 + +Yes, sir? + +00:12:15.500 --> 00:12:20.000 + +I come about your advert - 'Small white pussy cat for sale. Excellent condition'. + +00:12:20.000 --> 00:12:21.800 + +Ah. You wish to buy it? + +00:12:21.800 --> 00:12:26.500 + +That's right. Just for the hour. Only I ain't gonna pay more'n a fiver cos it ain't worth it. + +00:12:26.500 --> 00:12:29.000 + +Well it's come from a very good home - it's house trained. + +00:12:29.000 --> 00:12:36.000 + +[action] Long think; he goes to door, checks ads again] Chest of drawers? Chest. Drawers. I'd like some chest of drawers please. + +00:12:36.000 --> 00:12:37.500 + +Yes, sir. + +00:12:37.500 --> 00:12:39.000 + +Does it go? + +00:12:39.000 --> 00:12:42.500 + +Er, it's over there in the corner. [action] Indicates a wooden chest of drawers. + +00:12:42.500 --> 00:12:47.500 + +Oh. [action] Goes to door, runs his finger down adverts] Pram for sale. Any offers. I'd like a bit of pram please. + +00:12:47.500 --> 00:12:49.500 + +Ah yes, sir. That's in good condition. + +00:12:49.500 --> 00:12:52.000 + +Oh good, I like them in good condition, eh? Eh? + +00:12:52.000 --> 00:12:55.000 + +Yes, here it is you see. [action] Picks up pram. + +00:12:55.000 --> 00:13:00.000 + +[action] Looks, pauses, goes back to the door, scans list again] Babysitter. No, it's a babysitter. Babysitter? + +00:13:00.000 --> 00:13:01.500 + +Babysitter. + +00:13:01.500 --> 00:13:09.000 + +Babysitter - I don't want a babysitter. Be a blood donor - that's it. I'd like to give some blood please, argh! [action] Shopkeeper shakes head] Oh spit. Which one is it? [action] Shopkeeper slips him a card from pocket] Blond prostitute will indulge in any sexual activity for four quid a week. What does that mean? + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_14_-_Episode_Fourteen/4_The_Ministry_of_Silly_Walks.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_14_-_Episode_Fourteen/4_The_Ministry_of_Silly_Walks.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..3124ed17 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_14_-_Episode_Fourteen/4_The_Ministry_of_Silly_Walks.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,124 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit starts at anchor #4. Timings are placeholders. + +00:15:00.000 --> 00:15:06.000 +[action] A city gent with a silly walk enters the shop, buys a paper, then proceeds down the street in an indescribably silly manner. + +00:15:06.000 --> 00:15:07.800 + +'Times' please. + +00:15:07.800 --> 00:15:09.500 + +Oh yes sir, here you are. + +00:15:09.500 --> 00:15:10.800 + +Thank you. + +00:15:10.800 --> 00:15:12.000 + +Cheers. + +00:15:12.000 --> 00:15:19.000 +[action] He walks along Whitehall in a silly way and enters a building labelled 'Ministry of Silly Walks'. Inside, others walk eccentrically. Cut to an office; a man waits. + +00:15:19.000 --> 00:15:26.000 + +Good morning. I'm sorry to have kept you waiting, but I'm afraid my walk has become rather sillier recently, and so it takes me rather longer to get to work. [action] Sits at desk] Now then, what was it again? + +00:15:26.000 --> 00:15:30.000 + +Well sir, I have a silly walk and I'd like to obtain a Government grant to help me develop it. + +00:15:30.000 --> 00:15:32.000 + +I see. May I see your silly walk? + +00:15:32.000 --> 00:15:33.500 + +Yes, certainly, yes. + +00:15:33.500 --> 00:15:37.500 +[action] He demonstrates: the left leg does a forward aerial half turn every alternate pace. + +00:15:37.500 --> 00:15:39.000 + +That's it, is it? + +00:15:39.000 --> 00:15:40.500 + +Yes, that's it, yes. + +00:15:40.500 --> 00:15:46.000 + +It's not particularly silly, is it? I mean, the right leg isn't silly at all and the left leg merely does a forward aerial half turn every alternate step. + +00:15:46.000 --> 00:15:49.000 + +Yes, but I think that with Government backing I could make it very silly. + +00:15:49.000 --> 00:15:59.000 + +[action] Rising; walks absurdly behind the desk] Mr Pudey, the very real problem is one of money. I'm afraid that the Ministry of Silly Walks is no longer getting the kind of support it needs. You see there's Defense, Social Security, Health, Housing, Education, Silly Walks … they're all supposed to get the same. But last year, the Government spent less on the Ministry of Silly Walks than it did on National Defence. Now we get £348,000,000 a year, which is supposed to be spent on all our available products. [action] He sits] Coffee? + +00:15:59.000 --> 00:16:00.500 + +Yes please. + +00:16:00.500 --> 00:16:03.000 + +[action] Presses intercom] Now Mrs Two-Lumps, would you bring us in two coffees please? + +00:16:03.000 --> 00:16:04.500 + +Yes, Mr Teabag. + +00:16:04.500 --> 00:16:09.000 + +… Out of her mind. Now the Japanese have a man who can bend his leg back over his head and back again with every single step. While the Israelis… ah, here's the coffee. + +00:16:09.000 --> 00:16:13.000 +[action] Secretary enters with tray, silly-walks; by arrival, cups are empty. Minister peeks and smiles understandingly. + +00:16:13.000 --> 00:16:15.500 + +Thank you - lovely. [action] She exits] You're really interested in silly walks, aren't you? + +00:16:15.500 --> 00:16:17.000 + +Oh rather. Yes. + +00:16:17.000 --> 00:16:18.500 + +Well take a look at this, then. + +00:16:18.500 --> 00:16:24.000 +[action] Produces a projector, already spooled and plugged; switches it on to show an old silent-movie sequence of silly walkers. + +00:16:24.000 --> 00:16:28.000 +[action] Back to office: minister hurls projector and desk contents away; leans forward. + +00:16:28.000 --> 00:16:31.000 + +Now Mr Pudey. I'm not going to mince words with you. I'm going to offer you a Research Fellowship on the Anglo-French silly walk. + +00:16:31.000 --> 00:16:32.500 + +La Marche Futile? + +00:16:32.500 --> 00:16:36.500 +[action] Cut to two Frenchmen in a field with a third figure under a sheet. + +00:16:36.500 --> 00:16:43.000 + +Bonjour … et maintenant … comme d'habitude, au sujet du Le Marché Commun. Et maintenant, je vous présente, encore une fois, mon ami, le pouf célèbre, Jean-Brian Zatapathique. [action] He removes his moustache and sticks it onto the other Frenchman. + +00:16:43.000 --> 00:16:49.000 + +Merci, mon petit chou-chou Brian Trubshawe. Et maintenant avec les pieds à droite, et les pieds au gauche, et maintenant l'Anglais-Française Marche Futile, et voilà + +00:16:49.000 --> 00:16:54.000 +[action] They unveil the third man: split costume, half English city gent, half à la française; he departs in eccentric, sped-up motion. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_14_-_Episode_Fourteen/5_The_Piranha_brothers.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_14_-_Episode_Fourteen/5_The_Piranha_brothers.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..bf27359a --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_14_-_Episode_Fourteen/5_The_Piranha_brothers.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,378 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit starts at anchor #5. Timings are placeholders; includes presenter segments and montage. + +00:19:00.000 --> 00:19:05.000 + +And now a choice of viewing on BBC Television. [action] Cut to BBC world symbol] Just started on BBC2, the semi final of Episode 3 of 'Kierkegaard's Journals', staring Richard Chamberlain, Peggy Mount and Billy Bremner, and on BBC1, 'Ethel the Frog' + +00:19:05.000 --> 00:19:08.000 +[caption] ETHEL THE FROG [action] Presenter at desk in grey suit and floral tie. + +00:19:08.000 --> 00:19:40.000 + +Good evening. On 'Ethel the Frog' tonight we look at violence. The violence of British Gangland. Last Tuesday a reign of terror was ended when the notorious Piranha brothers, Doug and Dinsdale [caption: photo] after one of the most extraordinary trials in British legal history, were sentenced to four hundred years imprisonment for crimes of violence. Tonight Ethel the Frog examines the rise to power of the Piranhas, the methods they used to subjugate rival gangs and their subsequent tracking down and capture by the brilliant Superintendent Harry 'Snapper' Organs of Q Division. [action: photo of grotty East End house] Doug and Dinsdale Piranha were born, on probation, in this small house in Kipling Road, Southwark, the eldest sons in a family of sixteen. Their father Arthur Piranha, a scrap-metal dealer and TV quizmaster, was well known to the police, and a devout Catholic. In January 1928 he had married Kitty Malone, [action: old wedding photo] an up-and-coming East End boxer. Doug was born in February 1929 and Dinsdale two weeks later; and again a week after that. Their next door neighbour was Mrs April Simnel. + +00:19:40.000 --> 00:19:48.000 +[action] Exterior street; interviewer with Mrs Simnel; line of gas men behind. + +00:19:48.000 --> 00:19:54.000 + +Kipling Road was a typical sort of East End street, people were in and out of each other's houses with each other's property all day. They were a cheery lot. + +00:19:54.000 --> 00:19:56.500 + +Was it a terribly violent area? + +00:19:56.500 --> 00:20:13.000 + +[laughs deprecatingly] Oh ho……yes. Cheerful and violent. I remember Doug was very keen on boxing, until he learned to walk, then he took up putting the boot in the groin. Oh he was very interested in that. His mother had such trouble getting him to come in for his tea. He'd be out there putting his little boot in, you know, bless him. You know kids were very different then. They didn't have their heads filled with all this Cartesian dualism. + +00:20:13.000 --> 00:20:17.000 +[action] Cut to school playground. + +00:20:17.000 --> 00:20:20.000 + +At the age of fifteen Doug and Dinsdale started attending the Ernest Pythagoras Primary School in Clerkenwell. + +00:20:20.000 --> 00:20:24.000 +[action] Pan to Anthony Viney and interviewer with stick mike. + +00:20:24.000 --> 00:20:27.000 + +Anthony Viney. You taught the Piranha brothers English. What do you remember most about them? + +00:20:27.000 --> 00:20:35.000 +[action] The stick mike points at the wrong person throughout as Viney answers with grand gestures. [caption] Extended off-mic anecdote continues. + +00:20:35.000 --> 00:20:36.500 + +…Anthoney Viney. + +00:20:36.500 --> 00:20:45.000 +[action] Cut to presenter. + +00:20:45.000 --> 00:21:07.000 + +When the Piranhas left school they were called up but were found by an Army Board to be too unstable even for National Service. Denied the opportunity to use their talents in the service of their country, they began to operate what they called 'The Operation'. They would select a victim and then threaten to beat him up if he paid the so-called protection money. Four months later they started another operation which they called 'The Other Operation'. In this racket they selected another victim and threatened not to beat him up if he didn't pay them. One month later they hit upon 'The Other Other Operation'. In this the victim was threatened that if he didn't pay them, they would beat him up. This for the Piranha brothers was the turning point. + +00:21:07.000 --> 00:21:11.000 +[action] Cut to Superintendent Organs] [caption] HARRY "SNAPPER" ORGANS + +00:21:11.000 --> 00:21:28.000 + +Doug and Dinsdale Piranha now formed a gang, which they called 'The Gang' and used terror to take over night clubs, billiard halls, gaming casinos and race tracks. When they tried to take over the MCC they were for the only time in their lives, slit up a treat. As their empire spread however, we in Q Division were keeping tabs on their every move by reading the colour supplements. + +00:21:28.000 --> 00:21:31.000 + +A small-time operator who fell foul of Dinsdale Piranha was Vince Snetterton-Lewis. + +00:21:31.000 --> 00:21:34.000 +[action] Cut to Vince in a chair in a nasty flat. + +00:21:34.000 --> 00:21:58.000 + +Well one day I was sitting at home threatening the kids, and I looked out of the hole in the wall and sees this tank drive up and one of Dinsdale's boys gets out and he comes up, all nice and friendly like, and says Dinsdale wants to have a talk with me. So he chains me to the back of the tank and takes me for a scrape round to Dinsdale's. And Dinsdale's there in the conversation pit with Doug and Charles Paisley, the baby crusher, and a couple of film producers and a man they called 'Kierkegaard', who just sat there biting the heads of whippets and Dinsdale says 'I hear you've been a naughty boy Clement' and he splits me nostrils open and saws me leg off and pulls me liver out, and I said my name's not Clement and then he loses his temper and nails my head to the floor. + +00:21:58.000 --> 00:22:01.000 + +[off] He nailed your head to the floor? + +00:22:01.000 --> 00:22:02.500 + +At first, yeah + +00:22:02.500 --> 00:22:04.000 +[action] Cut to presenter. + +00:22:04.000 --> 00:22:06.000 + +Another man who had his head nailed to the floor was Stig O' Tracey. + +00:22:06.000 --> 00:22:08.500 +[action] Cut to a younger, cheerful man on sofa. + +00:22:08.500 --> 00:22:10.500 + +Stig, I've been told Dinsdale Piranha nailed your head to the floor. + +00:22:10.500 --> 00:22:14.000 + +No, no. Never, never. He was a smashing bloke. He used to give his mother flowers and that. He was like a brother to me. + +00:22:14.000 --> 00:22:17.000 + +But the police have film of Dinsdale actually nailing your head to the floor. + +00:22:17.000 --> 00:22:18.500 + +Oh yeah, well - he did that, yeah. + +00:22:18.500 --> 00:22:19.800 + +Why? + +00:22:19.800 --> 00:22:24.000 + +Well he had to, didn't he? I mean, be fair, there was nothing else he could do. I mean, I had transgressed the unwritten law. + +00:22:24.000 --> 00:22:25.500 + +What had you done? + +00:22:25.500 --> 00:22:32.000 + +Er… Well he never told me that. But he gave me his word that it was the case, and that's good enough for me with old Dinsy. I mean, he didn't want to nail my head to the floor. I had to insist. He wanted to let me off. There's nothing Dinsdale wouldn't do for you. + +00:22:32.000 --> 00:22:34.000 + +And you don't bear him any grudge? + +00:22:34.000 --> 00:22:36.000 + +A grudge! Old Dinsy? He was a real darling. + +00:22:36.000 --> 00:22:39.000 + +I understand he also nailed your wife's head to a coffee table. Isn't that right Mrs O' Tracey? + +00:22:39.000 --> 00:22:41.500 +[action] Camera pans to show woman with coffee table nailed to head. + +00:22:41.500 --> 00:22:42.800 + +Oh, no. No. No. + +00:22:42.800 --> 00:22:46.000 + +Yeah, well, he did do that. Yeah, yeah. He was a cruel man, but fair + +00:22:46.000 --> 00:22:48.500 +[action] Cut back to Vince. + +00:22:48.500 --> 00:22:50.800 + +Vince, after he nailed your head to the floor, did you ever see him again + +00:22:50.800 --> 00:22:55.000 + +Yeah…..after that I used to go round his flat every Sunday lunchtime to apologize and we'd shake hands and then he'd nail my head to the floor + +00:22:55.000 --> 00:22:56.500 + +Every Sunday? + +00:22:56.500 --> 00:23:03.000 + +Yeah but he was very reasonable about it. I mean one Sunday when my parents were coming round for tea, I asked him if he'd mind very much not nailing my head to the floor that week and he agreed and just screwed my pelvis to a cake stand. + +00:23:03.000 --> 00:23:06.000 +[action] Cut to man affixed to a coffee table and a standard lamp. + +00:23:06.000 --> 00:23:08.000 + +He was the only friend I ever had. + +00:23:08.000 --> 00:23:10.000 +[action] Cut to block of concrete with a man upside down, head buried. + +00:23:10.000 --> 00:23:11.500 + +I wouldn't head a word against him. + +00:23:11.500 --> 00:23:13.000 +[action] Cut to a gravestone: 'R.I.P. and Good Luck, Dinsdale'. + +00:23:13.000 --> 00:23:14.500 + +Lovely fella. + +00:23:14.500 --> 00:23:17.000 +[action] Cut to presenter. + +00:23:17.000 --> 00:23:20.000 + +Clearly Dinsdale inspired tremendous loyalty and terror amongst his business associates, but what was he really like? + +00:23:20.000 --> 00:23:22.500 +[action] Cut to a bar. + +00:23:22.500 --> 00:23:31.000 + +I walked out with Dinsdale on many occasions and found him a most charming and erudite companion. He was wont to introduce one to eminent persons, celebrated American singers, members of the aristocracy and other gang leaders. + +00:23:31.000 --> 00:23:33.000 + +[off] How had he met them? + +00:23:33.000 --> 00:23:40.000 + +Through his work for charity. He took a warm interest in Boys' Clubs, Sailors' Homes, Choristers' Associations, Scouting Jamborees and of course the Household Cavalry. + +00:23:40.000 --> 00:23:42.000 + +Was there anything unusual about him? + +00:23:42.000 --> 00:23:53.000 + +I should say not. Dinsdale was a perfectly normal person in every way. Except in as much as he was convinced that he was being watched by a giant hedgehog whom he referred to as Spiny Norman. + +00:23:53.000 --> 00:23:54.800 + +How big was Norman supposed to be? + +00:23:54.800 --> 00:24:09.000 + +Normally he was wont to be about twelve feet from nose to tail, but when Dinsdale was very depressed Norman could be anything up to eight hundred yards long. When Norman was about, Dinsdale would go very quiet and his nose would swell up and his teeth would start moving about and he'd become very violent and claim that he'd laid Stanley Baldwin. Dinsdale was a gentleman. And what's more he knew how to treat a female impersonator. + +00:24:09.000 --> 00:24:11.000 +[caption] A CRIMINOLOGIST [action] Cut to dark-suited loony in armchair. + +00:24:11.000 --> 00:24:20.000 + +It is easy for us to judge Dinsdale Piranha too harshly. After all he only did what many of us simply dream of doing… [tic… controls himself] I'm sorry. After all a murderer is only an extroverted suicide. Dinsdale was a looney, but he was a happy looney. Lucky bastard. + +00:24:20.000 --> 00:24:23.000 + +Most of the strange tales concern Dinsdale, but what about Doug? One man who met him was Luigi Vercotti. + +00:24:23.000 --> 00:24:25.500 +[action] Cut to tatty office; Vercotti at desk. + +00:24:25.500 --> 00:24:56.000 + +Well, I had been running a successful escort agency - high class, no really, high class girls - we didn't have any of that. That was right out. And I decided. [action] Phone rings] Excuse me [answers] Hello……no, not now……shtoom…shtoom….right……yes, we'll have the watch ready for you at midnight…….the watch…..the Chinese watch….yes, right-oh, bye-bye mother [hangs up] Anyway I decided then to open a high-class night club for the gentry at Biggleswade with International cuisine, cooking, top-line acts, and not a cheap clip joint for picking up tarts, that was right out, I deny that completely, and one night Dinsdale walked in with a couple of big lads, one of whom was carrying a tactical nuclear missile. They said I'd bought one of their fruit machines and would I pay for it. + +00:24:56.000 --> 00:24:57.800 + +How much did they want? + +00:24:57.800 --> 00:25:00.000 + +Three quarters of a million pounds. Then they went out. + +00:25:00.000 --> 00:25:02.000 + +Why didn't you call the police? + +00:25:02.000 --> 00:25:07.000 + +Well I had noticed that the lad with the thermo-nuclear device was the Chief Constable for the area. Anyway a week later they came back, said that the cheque had bounced and that I had to see Doug. + +00:25:07.000 --> 00:25:08.500 + +Doug? + +00:25:08.500 --> 00:25:13.000 + +Doug [drinks] I was terrified of him. Everyone was terrified of Doug. I've seen grown men pull their own heads off rather than see Doug. Even Dinsdale was frightened of Doug. + +00:25:13.000 --> 00:25:14.500 + +What did he do? + +00:25:14.500 --> 00:25:18.000 + +He used sarcasm. He knew all the tricks, dramatic irony, metaphor, bathos, puns, parody, litotes and satire. + +00:25:18.000 --> 00:25:21.000 +[action] Cut to map. + +00:25:21.000 --> 00:25:26.000 + +[voice over] By a combination of violence and sarcasm, the Piranha brothers by February 1966 controlled London and the South East. In February, though, Dinsdale made a big mistake. + +00:25:26.000 --> 00:25:29.000 +[action] Back to bar; Gloria. + +00:25:29.000 --> 00:25:34.000 + +Latterly Dinsdale had become increasingly worried about Spiny Norman. He had come to the conclusion that Norman slept in an aeroplane hangar at Luton Airport. + +00:25:34.000 --> 00:25:39.000 + +And so on February 22nd 1966, at Luton airport… [action] Stock film of H-Bomb exploding] Even the police began to sit up and take notice. + +00:25:39.000 --> 00:25:45.000 +[action] Cut to 'Snapper' Organs. + +00:25:45.000 --> 00:26:22.000 + +The Piranhas realized they had gone too far and that the hunt was on. They went into hiding and I decided on a subtle approach, viz some form of disguise, as the old helmet and boots are a bit of a giveaway. Luckily my years with Bristol Rep. stood me in good stead, as I assumed a bewildering variety of disguises. I tracked them to Cardiff, posing as the Reverend Smiler Egret. Hearing they'd gone back to London, I assumed the identity of a pork butcher, Brian Stoats. [caption: photo of Organs as butcher] On my arrival in London, I discovered they had returned to Cardiff, I followed as Gloucester from 'King Lear'. [caption: photo of Organs as Gloucester] Acting on a hunch I spent several months in Buenos Aires as Blind Pew, returning through the Panama Canal as Ratty, in 'Toad of Toad Hall'. [caption: photo of Ratty] Back in Cardiff, I relived my triumph as Sancho Panza [caption: photo] in 'Man of la Mancha' which the 'Bristol Evening Post' described as 'a glittering performance of rare perception', although the 'Bath Chronicle' was less than enthusiastic. In fact it gave me a right panning. I quote… + +00:26:22.000 --> 00:26:26.000 +[caption] Press cutting appears on screen. + +00:26:26.000 --> 00:26:31.000 + +'As for the performance of Superintendent Harry "Snapper" Organs as Sancho Panza, the audience were bemused by his high-pitched Welsh accent and intimidated by his abusive ad-libs.' + +00:26:31.000 --> 00:26:34.000 +[caption] The Western Daily News (letterhead). + +00:26:34.000 --> 00:26:38.000 + +[off] The 'Western Daily News' said…… + +00:26:38.000 --> 00:26:44.000 + +'Sancho Panza (Mr Organs) spoilt an otherwise impeccably choreographed rape scene by his unscheduled appearance and persistent cries of "What's all this then?"' + +00:26:44.000 --> 00:26:47.000 +[action] Cut to backstage dressing-room with make-up mirrors. + +00:26:47.000 --> 00:26:49.000 + +Never mind, Snapper, love, you can't win 'em all + +00:26:49.000 --> 00:26:51.000 + +True constable. Could I have my eye-liner please? + +00:26:51.000 --> 00:26:52.500 + +Telegram for you, love. + +00:26:52.500 --> 00:26:54.000 + +Good-oh. Bet it's from Binkie. + +00:26:54.000 --> 00:26:56.500 + +Those flowers are for Sergant Lauderdale - from the gentleman waiting outside + +00:26:56.500 --> 00:26:57.800 + +Oh good + +00:26:57.800 --> 00:27:00.000 + +[action] Knock knock; head round door] Thirty seconds, superintendent. + +00:27:00.000 --> 00:27:02.000 + +Oh blimey, I'm on. Is me hat straight, constable? + +00:27:02.000 --> 00:27:03.500 + +Oh it's fine + +00:27:03.500 --> 00:27:05.000 + +Right here we go then, Hawkins. + +00:27:05.000 --> 00:27:06.500 + +Oh, merde, superintendent. + +00:27:06.500 --> 00:27:08.000 + +Good luck, then. + +00:27:08.000 --> 00:27:12.000 +[action] Exterior Police Station. They come down the stairs and walk along pavement. The city gent passes doing his silly walk. Cut to a newspaper seller. + +00:27:12.000 --> 00:27:14.000 + +Read all about it. Piranha brothers escape. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_15_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/0_Episode15_head_tail.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_15_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/0_Episode15_head_tail.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..fc1eff5f --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_15_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/0_Episode15_head_tail.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,49 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-timed intro and end credits assembled from page title and cold open. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:05.000 +[caption] Animated titles. Music: Black Dyke Mills Band playing a slow dirge. + +00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:10.000 +[caption] Stock shot of mill town at the turn of the century - at night. + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:13.000 +[caption] SUBTITLE: 'JARROW - NEW YEAR'S EVE 1911' + +00:00:13.000 --> 00:00:16.000 +[caption] SUBTITLE: 'JARROW 1912' + +00:24:30.000 --> 00:24:34.000 + +Two, er, three to the Old Bailey please. + +00:24:34.000 --> 00:24:38.000 +[caption] Credits start superimposed. + +00:24:38.000 --> 00:24:41.000 + +Look they've started the credits. + +00:24:41.000 --> 00:24:44.000 + +Hurry. Hurry. Hurry. + +00:24:44.000 --> 00:24:47.000 + +Come on hurry. Hurry! + +00:24:47.000 --> 00:24:52.000 +[action] Shots of the bus coming through London. + +00:24:52.000 --> 00:24:57.000 + +There's the lighting credit, only five left. Hell, it's the producer - quick! + +00:24:57.000 --> 00:25:02.000 +[action] They leap off the bus into the Old Bailey, burst into the courtroom. + +00:25:02.000 --> 00:25:06.000 + +Nobody expects the Spa... [caption] 'The End' appears. Oh bugger! + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_15_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/1_Man-powered_flight.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_15_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/1_Man-powered_flight.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..6836238e --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_15_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/1_Man-powered_flight.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,24 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit starts at anchor #1. Includes cold open and announcer. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:08.000 +[action] A field. A man with a large mechanical wings, pulleys and gears contraption runs, trying to fly. + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:14.000 +[action] He goes faster, then leaps off a dune/hillock and appears to take off; slow-motion glide. + +00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:18.000 +[action] He hits what seems a cliff; camera twists upright revealing a beach below. + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:24.000 +[action] Pan across wreckage; other would-be fliers with heads in sand, legs kicking amid debris. + +00:00:24.000 --> 00:00:27.000 + +And now for something completely different. + +00:00:27.000 --> 00:00:29.000 + +It's... + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_15_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/2_The_Spanish_Inquisition.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_15_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/2_The_Spanish_Inquisition.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..a8f36e09 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_15_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/2_The_Spanish_Inquisition.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,191 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit starts at anchor #2 in Lady Mountback's sitting room and continues to dungeon sequence. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 +[action] Mill-owner's opulent sitting room. Lady Mountback crochets. A knock at the door. + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:06.000 + +Come in. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:08.000 +[action] Reg enters, cap in hand. + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:10.000 + +Trouble at mill. + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:12.000 + +Oh no. What sort of trouble? + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:15.000 + +One on't cross beams gone owt askew on treddle. + +00:00:15.000 --> 00:00:17.000 + +Pardon? + +00:00:17.000 --> 00:00:20.000 + +One on't cross beams gone owt askew on treddle. + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:23.000 + +I don't understand what you're saying. + +00:00:23.000 --> 00:00:28.000 +[stage direction] (slightly irritatedly, exaggeratedly clear) One of the cross beams has gone out askew on the treddle. + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:30.000 + +Well what on earth does that mean? + +00:00:30.000 --> 00:00:36.000 + +I don't know. Mr Wentworth just told me to say there was trouble at the mill — I didn't expect a kind of Spanish Inquisition. + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:42.000 +[action] Jarring chord. Door flies open. Cardinal Ximinez enters, flanked by Biggles and Fang. + +00:00:42.000 --> 00:00:55.000 + +Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition! Our chief weapon is surprise... surprise and fear... fear and surprise... our two weapons are fear and surprise... and ruthless efficiency... our three weapons are fear, surprise, and ruthless efficiency... and an almost fanatical devotion to the Pope... our four... no... amongst our weapons... I'll come in again. + +00:00:55.000 --> 00:00:58.000 + +I didn't expect a kind of Spanish Inquisition. + +00:00:58.000 --> 00:01:04.000 +[action] Jarring chord. They burst in again. + +00:01:04.000 --> 00:01:16.000 + +Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition! Amongst our weaponry are such diverse elements as fear, surprise, ruthless efficiency, and an almost fanatical devotion to the Pope, and nice red uniforms—oh damn! I can't say it, you'll have to say it. + +00:01:16.000 --> 00:01:18.000 + +What? + +00:01:18.000 --> 00:01:22.000 + +You'll have to say the bit about 'Our chief weapons are ...' + +00:01:22.000 --> 00:01:24.000 + +I couldn't do that... + +00:01:24.000 --> 00:01:27.000 +[action] Ximinez bundles the cardinals outside. + +00:01:27.000 --> 00:01:30.000 + +I didn't expect a kind of Spanish Inquisition. + +00:01:30.000 --> 00:01:34.000 +[action] They all enter again. + +00:01:34.000 --> 00:01:36.000 + +Er.... Nobody...um.... + +00:01:36.000 --> 00:01:37.500 + +Expects. + +00:01:37.500 --> 00:01:41.000 + +Expects... Nobody expects the...um...the Spanish...um... + +00:01:41.000 --> 00:01:42.500 + +Inquisition. + +00:01:42.500 --> 00:01:48.000 + +I know...I know! Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition. In fact, those who do expect... + +00:01:48.000 --> 00:01:49.500 + +Our chief weapons are... + +00:01:49.500 --> 00:01:52.000 + +Our chief weapons are...um...er... + +00:01:52.000 --> 00:01:53.500 + +Surprise. + +00:01:53.500 --> 00:01:55.500 + +Surprise and... + +00:01:55.500 --> 00:02:03.000 + +Stop. Stop there! Stop there. Whew! Our chief weapon is surprise, blah, blah, blah. Cardinal, read the charges. + +00:02:03.000 --> 00:02:08.000 + +You are hereby charged that you did on diverse dates commit heresy against the Holy Church. My old man said follow the... + +00:02:08.000 --> 00:02:11.000 + +That's enough. Now, how do you plead? + +00:02:11.000 --> 00:02:12.500 + +We're innocent. + +00:02:12.500 --> 00:02:16.000 +[caption] SUPERIMPOSED CAPTION: 'DIABOLICAL LAUGHTER' + +00:02:16.000 --> 00:02:18.500 + +We'll soon change your mind about that! + +00:02:18.500 --> 00:02:21.000 +[caption] SUPERIMPOSED CAPTION: 'DIABOLICAL ACTING' + +00:02:21.000 --> 00:02:27.000 + +Fear, surprise, and a most ruthless... ooooh! Now, Cardinal, the rack! + +00:02:27.000 --> 00:02:32.000 +[action] Biggles produces a plastic-coated dish-drying rack. Ximinez hums heavily to cover anger. + +00:02:32.000 --> 00:02:39.000 + +You... Right! Tie her down. Right! How do you plead? + +00:02:39.000 --> 00:02:40.500 + +Innocent. + +00:02:40.500 --> 00:02:45.000 + +Ha! Right! Cardinal, give the rack—oh dear—give the rack a turn. + +00:02:45.000 --> 00:02:48.000 +[action] Biggles stands awkwardly, shrugs. + +00:02:48.000 --> 00:02:49.000 + +I.... + +00:02:49.000 --> 00:02:55.000 +[stage direction] (gritting teeth) I know. I know you can't. I didn't want to say anything. It makes it all seem so stupid. + +00:02:55.000 --> 00:02:58.000 + +Shall I, um...? + +00:02:58.000 --> 00:03:02.000 + +Oh, go on, just pretend for God's sake. + +00:03:02.000 --> 00:03:06.000 +[action] Biggles turns an imaginary handle on the rack. Doorbell rings. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_15_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/3_Jokes_and_novelties_salesman.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_15_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/3_Jokes_and_novelties_salesman.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..1a225635 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_15_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/3_Jokes_and_novelties_salesman.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,92 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit starts at anchor #3 with the BBC Man linking to Johnson the novelty salesman. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 + +Ah, hello, you don't know me, but I'm from the BBC... come answer the door in a sketch over there. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:07.500 + +Oh, well all right, yes. + +00:00:07.500 --> 00:00:09.500 + +Jolly good. Come this way. + +00:00:09.500 --> 00:00:14.000 +[action] They exit, walk to BBC van; conversation heard faintly. + +00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:16.500 + +Yes, we're on film at the moment you see. + +00:00:16.500 --> 00:00:18.500 + +It's a link, is it? + +00:00:18.500 --> 00:00:26.000 + +Yes that's right... a link. It's all a bit zany... the kids seem to like it. I much prefer Des O'Connor... Rolf Harris... Tom Jones... + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:31.000 +[action] They arrive at a suburban house; Johnson the novelty salesman waits by the door. + +00:00:31.000 --> 00:01:01.000 + +Joke, sir? Guaranteed amusing... 'a naughty Humphrey'—it vomits... 'Black soap'—real fungus grows... real snakes... comedy hernia kit... plastic flesh wounds... 'honeymoon delight'—real skunk juice... 'wicked willy' with life-size winkle—serves warm beer... Pooh-Pooh machine... 'naughty nightie'—put it on and it melts... Guaranteed to break the ice at parties. Go on, go on. + +00:01:01.000 --> 00:01:02.000 + +What? + +00:01:02.000 --> 00:01:03.500 + +Do the punchline. + +00:01:03.500 --> 00:01:06.000 + +What punchline? + +00:01:06.000 --> 00:01:08.000 + +The punchline for this bit. + +00:01:08.000 --> 00:01:12.000 + +I don't know it. They didn't say anything about a punchline. + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:17.000 + +Oh! Oh well in that case I'll be saying goodbye then, sir... Goodbye then, sir. + +00:01:17.000 --> 00:01:22.000 +[action] Johnson exits; Reg runs to the BBC van. + +00:01:22.000 --> 00:01:23.500 + +What's the punchline? + +00:01:23.500 --> 00:01:34.000 + +Punchline? ... Ah—here we are. Oh! Ha, ha—very good. Pity we missed that. Still, we can always do it again. Make a series out of it. Sign here; you should hear from contracts in a year or two. + +00:01:34.000 --> 00:01:35.500 + +Can you give me a lift back? + +00:01:35.500 --> 00:01:41.000 + +Ah—can do. But won't. We were wondering if we could possibly borrow your head for a piece of animation. + +00:01:41.000 --> 00:01:42.000 + +What? + +00:01:42.000 --> 00:01:46.000 + +Oh jolly good. Thanks very much. You will get expenses. + +00:01:46.000 --> 00:01:50.000 +[action] BBC staff set on Reg and saw his head off. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_15_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/4_Tax_on_thingy.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_15_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/4_Tax_on_thingy.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..3e4bb7b4 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_15_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/4_Tax_on_thingy.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,76 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit starts at anchor #4 in the civil service committee room. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:16.000 + +Gentlemen, our MP saw the PM this AM and the PM wants more LSD from the PIB by tomorrow AM or PM at the latest... Now, the fiscal deficit... adjusted for seasonal variations... + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:18.000 + +I think he's talking about taxation. + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:22.000 + +Bravo, Madge. Well done. Taxation is indeed the very nub of my gist. We have to find something new to tax. + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:23.500 + +I understood that. + +00:00:23.500 --> 00:00:27.000 + +If I might put my head on the chopping block so you can kick it around a bit, sir... + +00:00:27.000 --> 00:00:28.500 + +Yes? + +00:00:28.500 --> 00:00:33.000 + +Well most things we do for pleasure nowadays are taxed, except one. + +00:00:33.000 --> 00:00:34.500 + +What do you mean? + +00:00:34.500 --> 00:00:38.000 + +Well, er, smoking's been taxed, drinking's been taxed but not ... thingy. + +00:00:38.000 --> 00:00:40.500 + +Good Lord, you're not suggesting we should tax... thingy? + +00:00:40.500 --> 00:00:41.500 + +Poo poo's? + +00:00:41.500 --> 00:00:42.500 + +No. + +00:00:42.500 --> 00:00:46.000 + +Thank God for that. Excuse me for a moment. + +00:00:46.000 --> 00:00:47.500 + +No, no, no - thingy. + +00:00:47.500 --> 00:00:49.000 + +Number ones? + +00:00:49.000 --> 00:00:50.500 + +No, thingy. + +00:00:50.500 --> 00:00:51.500 + +Thingy! + +00:00:51.500 --> 00:00:55.000 + +Ah, thingy. Well it'll certainly make chartered accountancy a much more interesting job. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_15_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/5_Vox_pops_on_tax.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_15_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/5_Vox_pops_on_tax.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..1f5bd320 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_15_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/5_Vox_pops_on_tax.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,34 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit starts at anchor #5 with street interviews. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:02.000 +[action] Cut to vox pops. + +00:00:02.000 --> 00:00:07.000 +[stage direction] (standing in water) I would put a tax on all people who stand in water ... Oh! + +00:00:07.000 --> 00:00:11.000 + +To boost the British economy I'd tax all foreigners living abroad. + +00:00:11.000 --> 00:00:16.000 + +I would tax the nude in my bed. No - not tax. What is the word? Oh - 'welcome'. + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:20.000 + +I would tax Racquel Welch. I've a feeling she'd tax me. + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:22.500 + +Bring back hanging and go into rope. + +00:00:22.500 --> 00:00:27.000 + +I would cut off the more disreputable parts of the body and use the space for playing fields. + +00:00:27.000 --> 00:00:29.500 + +I would tax holiday snaps. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_15_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/6_Photos_of_Uncle_Ted_(Spanish_Inquisition).vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_15_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/6_Photos_of_Uncle_Ted_(Spanish_Inquisition).vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..8c6fbf0e --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_15_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/6_Photos_of_Uncle_Ted_(Spanish_Inquisition).vtt @@ -0,0 +1,118 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit starts at anchor #6 with the photo album and continues to dungeon/comfy chair sequence. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Freeze frame; cut to snapshot held by a dear old lady with a large photo album. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:22.000 + +This is Uncle Ted in front of the house. This is Uncle Ted at the back of the house. And this is Uncle Ted at the side of the house. This is Uncle Ted back in front of the house, but you can see the side of the house. And this is Uncle Ted even nearer the side of the house, but you can still see the front. This is the back of the house, with Uncle Ted coming round the side to the front. And the is the Spanish Inquisition hiding behind the coal shed. + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:24.000 +[action] The young lady tears up each photo, then pauses at the last one with interest. + +00:00:24.000 --> 00:00:27.000 + +Oh! I didn't expect a Spanish Inquisition. + +00:00:27.000 --> 00:00:31.000 +[action] Jarring chord. Ximinez, Biggles and Fang enter. + +00:00:31.000 --> 00:00:34.000 + +Nobody expects the Spanish Inquisition! + +00:00:34.000 --> 00:00:40.000 +[action] Film montage over Bruegel tortures; epic music. + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:51.000 +[caption] IN THE EARLY YEARS OF THE SIXTEENTH CENTURY... THIS WAS THE SPANISH INQUISITION... + +00:00:51.000 --> 00:00:58.000 +[action] Torchlit dungeon. Dear old lady chained to wall. Ximinez inspects approvingly. + +00:00:58.000 --> 00:01:05.000 + +Now, old woman! You are accused of heresy on three counts... four counts. Do you confess? + +00:01:05.000 --> 00:01:08.000 + +I don't understand what I'm accused of. + +00:01:08.000 --> 00:01:12.000 + +Ha! Then we shall make you understand... Biggles! Fetch... the cushions! + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:15.000 +[action] Biggles produces two ordinary household cushions. + +00:01:15.000 --> 00:01:16.500 + +Here they are, lord. + +00:01:16.500 --> 00:01:24.000 + +Now, old lady, you have one last chance... two last chances... three last chances... + +00:01:24.000 --> 00:01:26.500 + +I don't know what you're talking about. + +00:01:26.500 --> 00:01:33.000 + +Right! Cardinal! Poke her with the soft cushions! Confess! Confess! Confess! + +00:01:33.000 --> 00:01:35.500 + +It doesn't seem to be hurting her, my lord. + +00:01:35.500 --> 00:01:37.500 + +Have you got all the stuffing up one end? + +00:01:37.500 --> 00:01:39.000 + +Yes, lord. + +00:01:39.000 --> 00:01:44.000 +[action] Ximinez hurls cushions away. Cardinal Fang—fetch... the comfy chair! + +00:01:44.000 --> 00:01:45.500 + +The comfy chair? + +00:01:45.500 --> 00:01:50.000 +[action] Fang pushes in a really plush comfy chair. + +00:01:50.000 --> 00:01:59.000 + +So you think you are strong... Biggles! Put her in the Comfy Chair! Now. You will stay until lunchtime, with only a cup of coffee at eleven... Is that really all it is? + +00:01:59.000 --> 00:02:01.500 + +Why, yes lord. + +00:02:01.500 --> 00:02:08.000 + +I see. I suppose we make it worse by shouting a lot, do we? Confess, woman. Confess! Confess! Confess! Confess! + +00:02:08.000 --> 00:02:09.500 + +I confess! + +00:02:09.500 --> 00:02:11.000 + +Not you! + +00:02:11.000 --> 00:02:12.500 + +I confess. + +00:02:12.500 --> 00:02:14.000 + +Who was that? + +00:02:14.000 --> 00:02:16.000 +[caption] ANIMATION: 'I confess' + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_15_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/7_The_semaphore_version_of_'Wuthering_Heights'.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_15_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/7_The_semaphore_version_of_'Wuthering_Heights'.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..b8229e66 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_15_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/7_The_semaphore_version_of_'Wuthering_Heights'.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,53 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit starts at anchor #7. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:08.000 + +And now for the very first time on the silver screen... Twentieth Century Vole presents 'The Semaphore Version of Wuthering Heights'. + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:11.000 +[caption] CAPTION: 'THE SEMAPHORE VERSION OF WUTHERING HEIGHTS' + +00:00:11.000 --> 00:00:20.000 +[action] Heathcliffe in profile, hair blowing; Catherine likewise on separate hilltops, intense stares. + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:23.000 +[caption] SUBTITLE: 'OH! CATHERINE' + +00:00:23.000 --> 00:00:26.000 +[caption] SUBTITLE: 'OH! HEATHCLIFFE' + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:29.000 +[caption] SUBTITLE: 'OH! OH! CATHERINE' + +00:00:29.000 --> 00:00:33.000 +[action] With each cut they are further apart; flags wave. + +00:00:33.000 --> 00:00:36.000 +[caption] SUBTITLE: 'OH! OH! HEATHCLIFFE' + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:39.000 +[caption] SUBTITLE: 'CATHERINE!' + +00:00:39.000 --> 00:00:42.000 +[caption] SUBTITLE: 'HARK! I HEAR MY HUSBAND' + +00:00:42.000 --> 00:00:45.000 +[caption] SUBTITLE: 'CATHERINE!' + +00:00:45.000 --> 00:00:49.000 +[caption] SUBTITLE: 'WAAAAAGH! WAAAAAAGH!' + +00:00:49.000 --> 00:00:51.000 +[caption] SUBTITLE: 'SSSH!' + +00:00:51.000 --> 00:00:54.000 +[caption] SUBTITLE: 'ZZZ . . . ZZZ . . .' + +00:00:54.000 --> 00:01:02.000 +[caption] SUBTITLE: 'YOU'VE BEEN SEEING HEATHCLIFFE' + +00:01:02.000 --> 00:01:12.000 +[caption] SUBTITLE: 'YES! YES! I'VE BEEN SEEING HEATHCLIFFE, AND WHY NOT? HE'S THE ONLY MAN I EVER LOVED. HE'S FINE. HE'S STRONG. HE'S ALL THE THINGS YOU'LL NEVER BE, AND WHAT'S MORE . . .' + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_15_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/8_'Julius_Caesar'_on_an_Aldis_lamp.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_15_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/8_'Julius_Caesar'_on_an_Aldis_lamp.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..31ae885c --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_15_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/8_'Julius_Caesar'_on_an_Aldis_lamp.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,43 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit starts at anchor #8 and includes OK Corral and smoke-signal gag. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:07.000 + +From the pulsating pages of history... Julius Caesar on an Aldis lamp! + +00:00:07.000 --> 00:00:09.500 +[caption] SUPERIMPOSED: 'JULIUS CAESAR ON AN ALDIS LAMP' + +00:00:09.500 --> 00:00:15.000 +[action] Soothsayer flashes Aldis lamp at Caesar. + +00:00:15.000 --> 00:00:18.000 +[caption] SUBTITLE: 'BEWARE THE IDES OF MARCH' + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:22.000 +[action] Caesar stabbed; he flashes a really big Aldis lamp. + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:24.500 +[caption] SUBTITLE: 'ET TU BRUTE' + +00:00:24.500 --> 00:00:28.000 + +From the makers of 'Gunfight at the OK Corral in Morse Code'. + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:31.000 +[caption] SUPERIMPOSED: 'GUNFIGHT AT THE OK CORRAL IN MORSE CODE' + +00:00:31.000 --> 00:00:33.000 +[action] Two cowboys buzz Morse at each other. + +00:00:33.000 --> 00:00:35.000 +[caption] SUBTITLE: 'AAAAHHHI' + +00:00:35.000 --> 00:00:39.000 + +And the smoke-signal version of 'Gentlemen Prefer Blondes'. + +00:00:39.000 --> 00:00:42.000 +[caption] SUPERIMPOSED: 'AND THE SMOKE-SIGNAL VERSION OF GENTLEMEN PREFER BLONDES' + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_15_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/9_Court_scene_(charades).vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_15_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/9_Court_scene_(charades).vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..c303c8ea --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_15_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/9_Court_scene_(charades).vtt @@ -0,0 +1,178 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit starts at anchor #9 through to Spanish Inquisition chase to credits. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:03.000 +[caption] SUPERIMPOSED: 'CENTRAL CRIMINAL COURT' + +00:00:03.000 --> 00:00:06.000 + +Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, have you reached a verdict? + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:07.500 + +We have m'lud. + +00:00:07.500 --> 00:00:16.000 +And how do you find the defendant? [action] Foreman mimes: two fingers; first word… rope? string? + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:17.500 + +Point? + +00:00:17.500 --> 00:00:19.000 + +Belt? + +00:00:19.000 --> 00:00:20.500 + +Tie? + +00:00:20.500 --> 00:00:22.000 + +Cravat? Silk square? + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:23.500 + +Knot? + +00:00:23.500 --> 00:00:25.000 + +Knot! + +00:00:25.000 --> 00:00:33.000 +[action] Second word: two syllables; first syllable—mimes fish at throat. Guesses ensue. + +00:00:33.000 --> 00:00:34.500 + +Fish wheeze. Fish wheeze? + +00:00:34.500 --> 00:00:36.000 + +Fish breathe. + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:40.000 +Fish breathe, throat? GILL! [action] Court applauds excitedly. + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:47.000 +[action] Second syllable: mimes drinking; guesses 'Drink/Sip/Imbibe'; points to cup. + +00:00:47.000 --> 00:00:55.000 + +Not gill ... cup? Not gillcup! You have been found not gillcup of the charges and may leave a free man. Right. My turn. + +00:00:55.000 --> 00:01:15.000 +[action] Judge charades: 'Call the next defendant' via four words: call / the / next / def-end-ant. + +00:01:15.000 --> 00:01:24.000 +Call the next defendant! [action] Court applauds; mood changes. The Honourable Mr Justice Kilbraken enters dock. + +00:01:24.000 --> 00:01:29.000 + +Not guilty. Case not proven. Court adjourned. + +00:01:29.000 --> 00:01:36.000 +[action] He hits the dock; everyone rises to leave. + +00:01:36.000 --> 00:01:41.000 + +No, no, no... No, you're in the dock, m'lud. + +00:01:41.000 --> 00:01:43.000 + +I'm a judge, m'lud. + +00:01:43.000 --> 00:01:45.000 + +So am I, m'lud, so watch it. + +00:01:45.000 --> 00:01:47.000 + +Hah! Call this a court. + +00:01:47.000 --> 00:01:50.000 + +Call this a court. Call this a court..Call this a court. + +00:01:50.000 --> 00:01:53.000 + +Shut up. Right now get on with the spiel. + +00:01:53.000 --> 00:02:03.000 + +M'lud, and my other lud, the prosecution will endeavour to show... Call exhibit Q—sorry, A. Call exhibit A. + +00:02:03.000 --> 00:02:08.000 +[action] Ushers reveal Miss Rita Thang in a provocative pose. + +00:02:08.000 --> 00:02:18.000 + +Exhibit A m'lud, Miss Rita Thang... found guilty under the Rude Behaviour Act... sentenced to be taken from this place and brought round to his place. + +00:02:18.000 --> 00:02:19.500 + +Objection, m'lud. + +00:02:19.500 --> 00:02:21.000 + +Objection sustained. + +00:02:21.000 --> 00:02:23.000 + +You shut up! Objection overruled. + +00:02:23.000 --> 00:02:30.000 + +The accused then commented on Miss Thang's bodily structure... placed his robes over his head and began to emit low moans. + +00:02:30.000 --> 00:02:32.500 + +Have you anything to say in your defense? + +00:02:32.500 --> 00:02:34.500 + +I haven't had any for weeks. + +00:02:34.500 --> 00:02:38.500 + +Oh no? What about that little number you've got tucked away in Belsize Park? + +00:02:38.500 --> 00:02:40.000 + +Oh, I never! + +00:02:40.000 --> 00:02:42.000 + +Oh no. Ho! Ho! Ho! + +00:02:42.000 --> 00:02:44.500 + +All right then what about 8a Woodford Square? + +00:02:44.500 --> 00:02:47.000 + +You say anything about that and I'll do you for treason. + +00:02:47.000 --> 00:02:49.000 + +M'lud if we could continue ... + +00:02:49.000 --> 00:02:51.000 + +He's got a Chinese bit there. + +00:02:51.000 --> 00:02:52.500 + +No, that's contempt of court. + +00:02:52.500 --> 00:03:21.000 + +It was only a joke. — Contempt of court. However, I'm not going to punish you, because we're so short of judges... South Africa... cat of nine tails... four death sentences a week... I'm off... But one final fling: I sentence you to be burnt at the stake. + +00:03:21.000 --> 00:03:23.500 + +Blimey! I didn't expect the Spanish Inquisition. + +00:03:23.500 --> 00:03:28.000 +[action] Court reacts. Cut to suburban house: the Inquisition sprints out to Dick Barton music, leaps onto a bus. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_16_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/0_Episode16_head_tail.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_16_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/0_Episode16_head_tail.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..5cd9a515 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_16_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/0_Episode16_head_tail.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,55 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Intro window gag, exploding animals, announcer, titles, and end-credit deja vu loop. Auto-generated placeholder timings. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 +[Wide shot of high flats; camera searches for a window.] + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:09.000 +[Busty girl at window stretches and mouths.] + +00:00:09.000 --> 00:00:12.500 + +[dubbed on very badly] My, isn't it hot in here. + +00:00:12.500 --> 00:00:18.000 +[She undresses to bra and panties, unhitches bra; announcer rises on window cleaner's hoist.] + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:21.000 + +And now for something completely different. + +00:00:21.000 --> 00:00:28.000 +[Cut to woodland clearing with stuffed animals; birdsong. The elk explodes.] + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:31.000 +[Back to window; Carol's arm tosses panties aside behind Announcer.] + +00:00:31.000 --> 00:00:34.000 + +And now for something more completely different… + +00:00:34.000 --> 00:00:36.000 +[Cut to 'It's' Man.] + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:38.000 + +It's… + +00:00:38.000 --> 00:00:46.000 +[Animated titles.] + +00:27:30.000 --> 00:27:35.000 +[SUPERIMPOSED CREDITS begin over repeating clip.] + +00:27:35.000 --> 00:27:39.000 + +Ah, come in. Now what seems to be the matter? + +00:27:39.000 --> 00:27:43.000 + +I have this terrible feeling of déjà vu.. + +00:27:43.000 --> 00:27:47.000 +[Clip repeats; dialogue loops as programme ends.] + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_16_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/1_A_bishop_rehearsing.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_16_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/1_A_bishop_rehearsing.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..c8df46e1 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_16_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/1_A_bishop_rehearsing.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,54 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit starts at anchor #1. Auto-generated placeholder timings. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[Woodland clearing of stuffed animals; elk’s remains smoulder; birdsong. Owl explodes. Pan to open field with Bishop rehearsing.] + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:16.000 + +'Oh Mr Belpit your legs are so swollen' … swollen .. 'Oh Mr Belpit - oh Mr Belpit your legs are so swollen'. (tries a different voice) 'Oh Mr Belpit., .' + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:21.000 + +Excuse me, excuse me. I saw your advertisement for flying lessons and I'd like to make an application. + +00:00:21.000 --> 00:00:25.000 + +Nothing to do with me. I'm not in this show. + +00:00:25.000 --> 00:00:31.000 + +Oh I see. D'you … d'you., . do you know about the flying lessons? + +00:00:31.000 --> 00:00:38.000 + +Nothing to do with me. I'm not in this show. This is show five - I'm not in until show eight. + +00:00:38.000 --> 00:00:41.000 + +Oh I see. + +00:00:41.000 --> 00:00:47.000 + +I'm just learning my lines, you know. 'Oh Mr Belpit, your legs…' + +00:00:47.000 --> 00:00:50.000 + +Bit awkward, I'm a bit stuck. + +00:00:50.000 --> 00:00:54.000 + +Yes, well. Try over there. + +00:00:54.000 --> 00:01:00.000 +[Bishop points to a secretary at a desk some yards away, typing with glasses.] + +00:01:00.000 --> 00:01:04.000 + +Oh yes, thanks. Thanks a lot. + +00:01:04.000 --> 00:01:10.000 + +'Oh Mr Belpit' - not at all - 'your legs are so swollen'. (He continues rehearsing as Mr Chigger moves over to the secretary) + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_16_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/2_Flying_lessons.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_16_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/2_Flying_lessons.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..10c4887b --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_16_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/2_Flying_lessons.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,344 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit starts at anchor #2, continues through Anemone and cockpit prelude. Auto-generated placeholder timings. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:05.000 + +Excuse me, I saw your advertisement for flying lessons and I'd like to make an application. + +00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:07.500 + +Appointment? + +00:00:07.500 --> 00:00:09.500 + +Yes, yes. + +00:00:09.500 --> 00:00:12.500 + +Certainly. Would you come this way, please. + +00:00:12.500 --> 00:00:24.000 +[Secretary trips off efficiently; leads across a river, passing business executives.] + +00:00:24.000 --> 00:00:26.500 + +Morning, Mr Jones, Mr Barnes. + +00:00:26.500 --> 00:00:33.000 +[Through a forest; pass tea trolley and tea lady.] + +00:00:33.000 --> 00:00:35.500 + +Morning Mrs Wills. + +00:00:35.500 --> 00:00:37.500 + +Morning, luv. + +00:00:37.500 --> 00:00:45.000 +[Bergman-esque hill skyline; greetings exchanged; then seashore; another executive hands paperwork.] + +00:00:45.000 --> 00:00:47.000 + +Take this to Marketing, would you. + +00:00:47.000 --> 00:00:52.000 +[Into a cave; footsteps; heavy door opens.] + +00:00:52.000 --> 00:00:54.500 + +Just follow me. + +00:00:54.500 --> 00:00:56.500 + +Oh thank you. + +00:00:56.500 --> 00:01:02.500 +[Shopping street; camera low across road surface.] + +00:01:02.500 --> 00:01:04.500 + +Oh, be careful. + +00:01:04.500 --> 00:01:06.500 + +Yes, nearly tripped. + +00:01:06.500 --> 00:01:08.500 + +Be there soon. + +00:01:08.500 --> 00:01:11.000 + +Good. It's a long way, isn't it? + +00:01:11.000 --> 00:01:13.000 + +Oh, get hold of that - watch it. + +00:01:13.000 --> 00:01:14.500 + +Morning. + +00:01:14.500 --> 00:01:18.000 + +Morning. Upstairs. Be careful, it's very steep. Almost there. + +00:01:18.000 --> 00:01:21.000 +[GPO tent in middle of road appears.] + +00:01:21.000 --> 00:01:22.500 + +Morning. + +00:01:22.500 --> 00:01:29.000 + +Morning. (they emerge) Will you come this way, please. (cut to interior office; another identical secretary) In here, please. + +00:01:29.000 --> 00:01:35.000 + +Thank you. (to second secretary) Hello, I saw your advertisement for flying lessons and I'd like to make an appointment. + +00:01:35.000 --> 00:01:40.000 + +Well, Mr Anemone's on the phone at the moment, but I'm sure he won't mind if you go on in. Through here. + +00:01:40.000 --> 00:01:42.000 + +Thank you. + +00:01:42.000 --> 00:01:46.000 +[Mr Anemone is suspended by a wire about nine feet up, on the telephone.] + +00:01:46.000 --> 00:02:05.000 + +Ah, won't be a moment. Make yourself at home. (into phone) No, no, well look, you can ask Mr Maudling but I'm sure he'll never agree. Not for fifty shillings … no… no. Bye-bye Gordon. Bye-bye. Oh dear. Bye-bye. (throws receiver; misses) Missed. Now Mr er… + +00:02:05.000 --> 00:02:06.500 + +Chigger. + +00:02:06.500 --> 00:02:10.000 + +Mr Chigger. So, you want to learn to fly? + +00:02:10.000 --> 00:02:11.500 + +Yes. + +00:02:11.500 --> 00:02:16.000 + +Right, well, up on the table, arms out, fingers together, knees bent… + +00:02:16.000 --> 00:02:18.000 + +No, no, no. + +00:02:18.000 --> 00:02:30.000 + +(very loudly) Up on the table! ... Arms out, fingers together, knees bent, now, head well forward. Now, flap your arms... now jump! [He jumps; lands on floor] Rotten... you weed! + +00:02:30.000 --> 00:02:32.000 + +Now look here… + +00:02:32.000 --> 00:02:36.000 + +All right, all right. I'll give you one more chance, get on the table… + +00:02:36.000 --> 00:02:40.000 + +Look, I came here to learn how to fly an aeroplane. + +00:02:40.000 --> 00:02:41.500 + +A what? + +00:02:41.500 --> 00:02:45.500 + +I came here to learn how to fly an aeroplane. + +00:02:45.500 --> 00:02:55.000 + +(sarcastically) Oh, 'an aeroplane'... (posh) 'Oh, oh, no more buttered scones for me, mater...' Now get on the table! + +00:02:55.000 --> 00:02:59.000 + +Look. No one in the history of the world has ever been able to fly like that. + +00:02:59.000 --> 00:03:04.000 + +Oh, I suppose mater told you that while you were out riding. Well, if people can't fly what am I doing up here? + +00:03:04.000 --> 00:03:05.500 + +You're on a wire. + +00:03:05.500 --> 00:03:07.000 + +Oh, a wire. I'm on a wire, am I? + +00:03:07.000 --> 00:03:10.000 + +Of course you're on a bloody wire. + +00:03:10.000 --> 00:03:12.000 + +I am not on a wire. I am flying. + +00:03:12.000 --> 00:03:20.000 +[They bicker 'You're on a wire' / 'I am flying'.] + +00:03:20.000 --> 00:03:23.000 + +I'll show you whether I'm on a wire or not. Give me the 'oop. + +00:03:23.000 --> 00:03:24.500 + +What? + +00:03:24.500 --> 00:03:31.000 + +Oh, I don't suppose we know what an 'oop is... + +00:03:31.000 --> 00:03:33.000 + +Oh, a hoop. + +00:03:33.000 --> 00:03:38.000 + +'Oh an hoop.' (taking hoop) Thank you, your bleeding Highness. Now. Look. (waves hoop over head and feet) + +00:03:38.000 --> 00:03:40.500 + +Go on, right the way along. + +00:03:40.500 --> 00:03:45.500 + +All right, all right... (moves hoop letting wire pass through gap) Now, where's the bleeding wire, then? + +00:03:45.500 --> 00:03:47.500 + +That hoop's got a hole in. + +00:03:47.500 --> 00:03:52.000 + +Oh Eton and Madgalene. The hoop has an hole in... + +00:03:52.000 --> 00:03:55.000 + +No, there's a gap in the middle, there. + +00:03:55.000 --> 00:04:00.000 + +Oh, a gahp. A gahp in one's hhhhhoop. Pardon me, but I'm off to play the grand piano. + +00:04:00.000 --> 00:04:04.000 + +Look, I can see you're on a wire - look, there it is. + +00:04:04.000 --> 00:04:18.000 +[Escalating 'Is'/'Isn't' argument until narration interrupts.] + +00:04:18.000 --> 00:04:24.000 + +Anyway, this rather pointless bickering went on for some time until… + +00:04:24.000 --> 00:04:28.000 +[CAPTION: 'TWO YEARS LATER' — Interior cockpit of airliner.] + +00:04:28.000 --> 00:04:31.500 + +Gosh, I am glad I'm a fully qualified arline pilot. + +00:04:31.500 --> 00:04:36.000 +[Cut to BALPA spokesman at desk with nameplate.] + +00:04:36.000 --> 00:04:43.000 + +The British Airline Pilots Association would like to point out that it takes a chap six years to become a fully qualified airline pilot, and not two. + +00:04:43.000 --> 00:04:49.000 +[CAPTION: 'FOUR YEARS LATER THAN THE LAST CAPTION' — cockpit for three seconds; back to BALPA.] + +00:04:49.000 --> 00:05:20.000 + +[BALPA man’s long fussbudget monologue about rules, tights, headaches; phone gags.] + +00:05:20.000 --> 00:05:25.000 +[Back in cockpit; banging on door.] + +00:05:25.000 --> 00:05:41.000 + +(off-screen) Are you going to be in there all day? ... Other people want to go you know! ... The door's jammed, if you ask me. [crash; door flies open] Ah. Oh my God. Oh, I'm terribly sorry. I thought this was the bally toilet. + +00:05:41.000 --> 00:05:44.000 + +This is the control cabin. + +00:05:44.000 --> 00:05:49.000 + +Oh I know that. I'm a flying man, you know… oh yes… Bally stupid mistake… + +00:05:49.000 --> 00:05:56.000 +[Zanie lingers awkwardly; pilots work.] + +00:05:56.000 --> 00:06:00.000 + +Cloud's heavy … What's the reading? + +00:06:00.000 --> 00:06:02.500 + +4.8… Steady. + +00:06:02.500 --> 00:06:08.000 + +If they had all those dials in the toilet… there wouldn't be room for anything else, would there. + +00:06:08.000 --> 00:06:12.000 + +(into intercom) Hello, Geneva this is Roger Five-O … What is your cloud reading? Hello, Geneva… + +00:06:12.000 --> 00:06:18.000 + +I wouldn't fancy flying one of those sitting on the toilet… + +00:06:18.000 --> 00:06:21.000 + +Geneva here. 4.9 … Heavy… Over. + +00:06:21.000 --> 00:06:22.500 + +Serious? + +00:06:22.500 --> 00:06:25.000 + +No, not if it keeps at that level, no. + +00:06:25.000 --> 00:06:37.000 + +Mind you, if you did fly it from the toilet it would leave a lot more space up here, wouldn't it. ... Well, I'd better get back to the cabin, then. ... Door's jammed. [shoulder charge; flies out of plane] Aaaaaaaaaarrrggghhhhhh! + +00:06:37.000 --> 00:06:42.000 +[Plane noise; Zanie lands on pile of straw outside a gent's lavatory.] + +00:06:42.000 --> 00:06:44.500 + +Bally piece of luck… + +00:06:44.500 --> 00:06:49.000 +[He brushes down and goes into gents. Hostess enters cockpit from cabin.] + +00:06:49.000 --> 00:06:51.500 + +Oh hello. Everything all right at the back? + +00:06:51.500 --> 00:06:54.000 + +Yes, they're as quiet as dormice. + +00:06:54.000 --> 00:06:55.500 + +Dormice? + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_16_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/3_Hijacked_plane_(to_Luton).vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_16_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/3_Hijacked_plane_(to_Luton).vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..a36adb0a --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_16_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/3_Hijacked_plane_(to_Luton).vtt @@ -0,0 +1,191 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit starts at anchor #3. Auto-generated placeholder timings. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:05.000 +[Door opens; neat man enters with revolver and silencer. Points it at pilots.] + +00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:10.000 + +All right, don't anybody move … except to control the aeroplane … you can move a little to do that. + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:12.000 + +Can I move? + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:20.000 + +Yes, yes, yes. You can move a little bit... involuntary muscular movements... got to take that into account. + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:23.500 + +Right. I mean one couldn't for example, stop one's insides from moving. + +00:00:23.500 --> 00:00:25.500 + +No, no. Good point, good point. + +00:00:25.500 --> 00:00:28.500 + +And the very fact that the plane is continuously vibrating means that we're all moving to a certain extent. + +00:00:28.500 --> 00:00:30.500 + +And we're all moving our lips, aren't we? + +00:00:30.500 --> 00:00:33.500 + +Yes, yes. + +00:00:33.500 --> 00:00:35.000 + +Absolutely. + +00:00:35.000 --> 00:00:38.000 + +No, the gist of my meaning was that sudden… er… + +00:00:38.000 --> 00:00:39.500 + +Exaggerated movements … + +00:00:39.500 --> 00:00:43.000 + +Exaggerated violent movements… are… are out. + +00:00:43.000 --> 00:00:48.000 + +Well, that's the great thing about these modern airliners... Pancho here doesn't have to move at all. + +00:00:48.000 --> 00:00:49.500 + +Oh, that's marvellous. + +00:00:49.500 --> 00:00:54.000 + +(cheerily) And I don't really need to move either … unless I get an itch or something… + +00:00:54.000 --> 00:00:56.500 +[They all laugh.] + +00:00:56.500 --> 00:01:01.000 + +Well that's wonderful … 60% success, eh? ... will you fly this plane to Luton, please? + +00:01:01.000 --> 00:01:04.000 + +Well, this is a scheduled flight to Cuba. + +00:01:04.000 --> 00:01:07.000 + +I know, I know, that's rather why I came in here with that point about nobody moving. + +00:01:07.000 --> 00:01:08.500 + +Within reason. + +00:01:08.500 --> 00:01:14.000 + +Within reason - yes. I… er … er… you know, I want you to fly this plane to Luton … please. + +00:01:14.000 --> 00:01:18.000 + +Right, well I'd better turn the plane round then. Stand by emergency systems. + +00:01:18.000 --> 00:01:20.500 + +Look I don't want to cause any trouble., + +00:01:20.500 --> 00:01:22.500 + +No, no, we'll manage, we'll manage. + +00:01:22.500 --> 00:01:27.000 + +I mean, near Luton will do, you know. Harpenden, do you go near Harpenden? + +00:01:27.000 --> 00:01:29.000 + +It's on the flight path. + +00:01:29.000 --> 00:01:33.000 + +Okay, well, drop me off there. I'll get a bus to Luton. It's only twenty-five minutes. + +00:01:33.000 --> 00:01:35.500 + +You can be in Luton by lunchtime. + +00:01:35.500 --> 00:01:37.000 + +Oh, well that's smashing. + +00:01:37.000 --> 00:01:39.500 + +Hang on! There's no airport at Harpenden. + +00:01:39.500 --> 00:01:44.000 + +Oh well, look, forget it. Forget it. I'll come to Cuba, and get a flight back to Luton from there. + +00:01:44.000 --> 00:01:47.000 + +Well, we could lend you a parachute. + +00:01:47.000 --> 00:01:51.000 + +No, no, no, no, no. I wouldn't dream of it… wouldn't dream of it… dirtying a nice, clean parachute. + +00:01:51.000 --> 00:01:55.000 + +I know - I know. There's a bale of hay outside Basingstoke. We could throw you out. + +00:01:55.000 --> 00:01:57.500 + +Well, if it's all right. + +00:01:57.500 --> 00:01:59.000 + +Sure, yeah. + +00:01:59.000 --> 00:02:00.500 + +Not any trouble? + +00:02:00.500 --> 00:02:02.000 + +None at all. + +00:02:02.000 --> 00:02:05.000 + +That's marvellous. Thank you very much. Sorry to come barging in. + +00:02:05.000 --> 00:02:06.500 + +Bye-bye. + +00:02:06.500 --> 00:02:08.000 + +Thank you. Bye. + +00:02:08.000 --> 00:02:09.500 + +Bye. + +00:02:09.500 --> 00:02:12.000 +[They open the door and throw him out.] + +00:02:12.000 --> 00:02:13.500 + +[as he falls] Thank you! + +00:02:13.500 --> 00:02:20.000 +[Gunman lands in a haystack; brushes down; hops fence; stops a bus 'Straight to Luton'.] + +00:02:20.000 --> 00:02:23.000 + +[Evil man with gun stands.] Take this bus to Cuba. + +00:02:23.000 --> 00:02:28.000 +[Bus destination flips to 'Straight to Cuba'; quick U-turn; out of frame.] + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_16_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/4_The_Poet_McTeagle.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_16_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/4_The_Poet_McTeagle.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..a925666c --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_16_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/4_The_Poet_McTeagle.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,106 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit starts at anchor #4. Auto-generated placeholder timings. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:08.000 +[Pan across rocky highland landscape; inspiring Scottish music.] + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:20.000 + +From these glens and scars... form the breathtaking backdrop against which Ewan McTeagle writes such poems as 'Lend us a quid till the end of the week'. + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:26.000 +[Crofter's cottage; McTeagle at window writing; slow zoom.] + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:30.000 + +But it was with more simple, homespun verses that McTeagle's unique style first flowered. + +00:00:30.000 --> 00:00:36.000 + +[voice over] If you could see your way to lending me sixpence. I could at least buy a newspaper. That's not much to ask anyone. + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:41.000 + +One woman who remembers McTeagle as a young friend - Lassie O'Shen. + +00:00:41.000 --> 00:00:48.000 +[Cut to Lassie; sound man makes advances; crew pull him away.] + +00:00:48.000 --> 00:00:53.000 + +Mr MeTeagle wrote me two poems, between the months of January and April 1969… + +00:00:53.000 --> 00:01:06.000 + +Och, I dinna like to… they were kinda personal… but I will. 'To Ma Own beloved Lassie. A poem on her 17th Birthday. Lend us a couple of bob till Thursday... Love Ewan.' + +00:01:06.000 --> 00:01:08.500 +[pause; she looks up.] + +00:01:08.500 --> 00:01:10.500 + +[voice over] Beautiful. + +00:01:10.500 --> 00:01:15.000 +[Sound man leaps on her; cut to abstract arts set. CAPTION: 'ST JOHN LIMBO -- POETRY EXPERT'] + +00:01:15.000 --> 00:01:27.000 + +(intensely) ... more recently ... fifteen shillings, £4.12.6 … even nine guineas … greatest work: 'Can I have fifty pounds to mend the shed?'. + +00:01:27.000 --> 00:01:32.000 +[Pan to stark poetry set; spotlight on an Ian McKellen-type in black leotard.] + +00:01:32.000 --> 00:01:44.000 + +Can I have fifty pounds to mend the shed? +I'm right on my uppers. +I can pay you back +When this postal order comes from Australia. +Honestly. +Hope the bladder trouble's getting better. +Love, Ewan. + +00:01:44.000 --> 00:01:50.000 +[Remote landscape; McTeagle by pillar box writing postcards at sunset.] + +00:01:50.000 --> 00:01:58.000 + +[voice over] ... 'My new cheque book hasn't arrived' ... 'What's twenty quid to the bloody Midland Bank?' ... 'Can you lend me one thousand quid?' + +00:01:58.000 --> 00:02:03.000 +[Cut to playwright at desk. CAPTION: 'A VERY GOOD PLAYWRIGHT'] + +00:02:03.000 --> 00:02:14.000 + +I think what McTeagle's pottery… er… poetry is doing is rejecting all the traditional cliches... and Milton's 'Can you lend us two bob till Tuesday'… + +00:02:14.000 --> 00:02:20.000 +[Long shot McTeagle walking countryside.] + +00:02:20.000 --> 00:02:30.000 + +[voice over] Oh give to me a shillin' for some fags... expecting a divvy from the Harpenden Building Society… + +00:02:30.000 --> 00:02:36.000 +[He passes a glen with stuffed animals; one explodes. Highland spokesman rises. CAPTION: 'A HIGHLAND SPOKESMAN'] + +00:02:36.000 --> 00:02:52.000 + +As a Highlander I would like to complain about some inaccuracies... BALPA spokesman... Puss in Boots ... French kiss ... scraped. + +00:02:52.000 --> 00:02:55.000 +[A doctor's head appears out from under the kilt.] + +00:02:55.000 --> 00:03:06.000 + +Look, would you mind going away, I'm trying to examine this man. (re-emerges) It's - er - it's all right - I am a doctor. Actually, I'm a gynaecologist… but this is my lunchhour. + +00:03:06.000 --> 00:03:08.000 +[ANIMATION begins.] + +00:03:08.000 --> 00:03:11.000 + +I've a nasty feeling I am somebody's lunchhour. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_16_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/5_Psychiatrist_milkman.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_16_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/5_Psychiatrist_milkman.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..c3db2e60 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_16_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/5_Psychiatrist_milkman.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,161 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit starts at anchor #5. Auto-generated placeholder timings. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:05.000 +[Animation leads to a living room. Doorbell rings; Lady opens; a milkman stands there.] + +00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:09.000 + +Pat-a-cake, pat-a-cake baker's man. Good morning, madam, I'm a psychiatrist. + +00:00:09.000 --> 00:00:11.500 + +You look like a milkman to me. + +00:00:11.500 --> 00:00:15.000 + +Good. (ticks form) I am in fact dressed as a milkman… you spotted that - well done. + +00:00:15.000 --> 00:00:16.500 + +Go away. + +00:00:16.500 --> 00:00:22.000 + +Now then, madam. I'm going to show you three numbers... (holds up card '3' '3' '3') + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:23.500 + +They're all number three. + +00:00:23.500 --> 00:00:25.000 + +No. Try again. + +00:00:25.000 --> 00:00:27.000 + +They're all number three? + +00:00:27.000 --> 00:00:32.000 + +No. They're all number three. (ticks board) Right. Now... word association: How many pints do you want? + +00:00:32.000 --> 00:00:34.000 + +(suspicious) Er, three? + +00:00:34.000 --> 00:00:35.500 + +Yogurt? + +00:00:35.500 --> 00:00:36.500 + +Er… no. + +00:00:36.500 --> 00:00:37.500 + +Cream? + +00:00:37.500 --> 00:00:38.500 + +No. + +00:00:38.500 --> 00:00:39.500 + +Eggs? + +00:00:39.500 --> 00:00:40.500 + +No. + +00:00:40.500 --> 00:00:47.000 + +(adding up, whistling) Right. Well, you're quite clearly suffering from a repressive libido complex... + +00:00:47.000 --> 00:00:49.000 + +You are a bloody milkman. + +00:00:49.000 --> 00:00:55.000 + +Don't you shout at me, madam... accompany me down to the dairy and do some aptitude tests. + +00:00:55.000 --> 00:00:58.000 + +I've got better things to do than come down to the dairy! + +00:00:58.000 --> 00:01:06.000 + +Mrs Ratbag... you are badly in need of an expensive course of psychiatric treatment... give hundreds of lower-paid workers a good laugh. + +00:01:06.000 --> 00:01:08.500 + +All right… but how am I going to get home? + +00:01:08.500 --> 00:01:10.500 + +I'll run you there and back on my psychiatrist's float. + +00:01:10.500 --> 00:01:12.000 + +All right. + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:18.000 +[They walk down garden path; CAPTION and arrow: 'A CAT'; the cat explodes.] + +00:01:18.000 --> 00:01:23.000 +[Milk float marked 'Psychiatrist's Dairy Ltd'; back loaded with files in milk crates.] + +00:01:23.000 --> 00:01:24.500 + +What are those? + +00:01:24.500 --> 00:01:30.000 + +They're case histories. (drives off; van speaker: 'Psychiatrists! Psychiatrists!') + +00:01:30.000 --> 00:01:37.000 + +Ah, good morning. I'm afraid our regular psychiatrist hasn't come round this morning … and I've got an ego block... + +00:01:37.000 --> 00:01:39.000 + +Oh, I see, sir. Who's your regular, sir? + +00:01:39.000 --> 00:01:41.000 + +Jersey Cream Psychiatrists. + +00:01:41.000 --> 00:01:46.000 + +Oh yes, I know them. (puts down crate; gets notepad) Right, well, er, what's your job, then? + +00:01:46.000 --> 00:01:47.500 + +I'm a doctor. + +00:01:47.500 --> 00:01:50.500 + +… Didn't I see you just now under a Scotsman? + +00:01:50.500 --> 00:01:54.000 + +Yes, but I am a doctor. Actually, I'm a gynaecologist but that was my lunchhour. + +00:01:54.000 --> 00:01:57.000 + +(shows a card) What does this remind you of?. + +00:01:57.000 --> 00:01:58.500 + +Two pints of cream. + +00:01:58.500 --> 00:02:04.000 + +Right… severe personality disorder... lactic obsession... depending on how much money you've got. + +00:02:04.000 --> 00:02:06.000 + +Yes, yes, I see. And a pot of yogurt, please. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_16_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/6_Complaints.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_16_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/6_Complaints.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..de83bfe1 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_16_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/6_Complaints.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,143 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit starts at anchor #6. Auto-generated placeholder timings. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 + +I would like to take this opportunity of complaining about the way in which these shows are continually portraying psychiatrists who make pat diagnoses of patients' problems without first obtaining their full medical history. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:10.000 +[Back to milkman with doctor; hands over yogurt.] + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:14.000 + +Mind you, that's just a pat diagnosis made without first obtaining your full medical history. + +00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:16.500 +[Cut to man at desk.] + +00:00:16.500 --> 00:00:21.500 + +I feel the time has come to complain about people who make rash complaints without first making sure that those complaints are justified. + +00:00:21.500 --> 00:00:23.500 +[Cut to Dr Cream.] + +00:00:23.500 --> 00:00:25.500 + +Are you referring to me? + +00:00:25.500 --> 00:00:27.500 +[Cut back to man.] + +00:00:27.500 --> 00:00:33.000 + +Not necessarily, however, I would like to point out that the BALPA spokesman was wearing the British Psychiatric Association Dinner Dance Club cuff-links. + +00:00:33.000 --> 00:00:35.000 +[Cut to Dr Cream.] + +00:00:35.000 --> 00:00:36.500 + +Oh yes, I noticed that too. + +00:00:36.500 --> 00:00:38.500 +[Cut to BALPA man.] + +00:00:38.500 --> 00:00:41.000 + +These are not British Psychiatric Association Dinner Dance Club cuff-links. + +00:00:41.000 --> 00:00:42.500 +[Cut to man.] + +00:00:42.500 --> 00:00:43.500 + +Sorry. + +00:00:43.500 --> 00:00:45.500 +[Cut to BALPA man.] + +00:00:45.500 --> 00:00:52.000 + +They are in fact British Sugar Corporation Gilbert-and-Sullivan Society cuff-links... last speaker should have checked his facts... + +00:00:52.000 --> 00:00:53.500 +[Cut to Dr Cream.] + +00:00:53.500 --> 00:00:55.000 + +Yes, that'll teach him. + +00:00:55.000 --> 00:00:57.500 +[Cut to BALPA man.] + +00:00:57.500 --> 00:01:03.000 + +However, I would just like to add a complaint about shows that have too many complaints in them as they get very tedious for the average viewer. + +00:01:03.000 --> 00:01:08.000 +[Cut to another man.] + +00:01:08.000 --> 00:01:14.000 + +I'd like to complain about people who hold things up by complaining about people complaining. It's about time something was done about it. + +00:01:14.000 --> 00:01:16.000 +[A sixteen-ton weight falls on him.] + +00:01:16.000 --> 00:01:22.000 +[Milkman and Lady on float; stop; he hails a milkmaid with yoke and pails.] + +00:01:22.000 --> 00:01:24.500 + +Nurse! Would you take Mrs Pim to see Dr Cream, please. + +00:01:24.500 --> 00:01:26.500 + +Certainly, doctor. Walk this way, please. + +00:01:26.500 --> 00:01:28.000 + +Oh, if I could walk that way I… + +00:01:28.000 --> 00:01:29.500 + +Sssssh! + +00:01:29.500 --> 00:01:35.000 +[They enter building; into psychiatrist's office. Dr Cream in chair.] + +00:01:35.000 --> 00:01:37.500 + +Mrs Pim to see you, Dr Cream. + +00:01:37.500 --> 00:01:41.500 + +Ah yes. I just want another five minutes with Audrey. Could you show Mrs Pim into the waiting room, please. + +00:01:41.500 --> 00:01:43.500 + +Yes, doctor. + +00:01:43.500 --> 00:01:47.000 +[As they leave we reveal a cow on the couch.] + +00:01:47.000 --> 00:01:51.000 + +Right, Audrey. When did you first start thinking you were a cow? + +00:01:51.000 --> 00:01:59.000 +[Montage walk through countryside like earlier: tea lady, bishop rehearsing, secretary desk, stuffed animals explode, loop again.] + +00:01:59.000 --> 00:02:03.000 + +(Australian accent) 'Jeez, Mr Belpit your legs is all swollen'… + +00:02:03.000 --> 00:02:08.000 + +(Scots accent) 'Oi, Mr Belpit - your great legs is all swollen!'… (then Japanese accent) + +00:02:08.000 --> 00:02:15.000 +[Cut to magazine graphics: CAPTION: 'IT'S THE MIND - A WEEKLY MAGAZINE OF THINGS PSYCHIATRIC'; science images montage.] + diff --git "a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_16_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/7_D\303\251j\303\240_vu.vtt" "b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_16_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/7_D\303\251j\303\240_vu.vtt" new file mode 100644 index 00000000..dd8e6664 --- /dev/null +++ "b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_16_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus/7_D\303\251j\303\240_vu.vtt" @@ -0,0 +1,84 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit starts at anchor #7. Auto-generated placeholder timings. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 + +Good evening. Tonight on 'It's the Mind', we examine the phenomenon of déjà vu... + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:12.000 + +Tonight on 'It's the Mind' we examine the phenomenon of déjà vu, that strange feeling we sometimes get that we've … (puzzled) Anyway... + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:18.000 +[Opening title sequence montage again. CAPTION: 'IT'S THE MIND'] + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:23.000 + +Good evening. Tonight on 'It's the Mind' we examine the phenomenon of dé… ja… vu… + +00:00:23.000 --> 00:00:28.000 +[Opening titles again; back to Boniface, now very shaken. CAPTION: 'IT'S THE MIND'] + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:40.000 + +Good … good evening. Tonight on 'It's the Mind' we examine the phenomenon of dddddddddddéjà vvvvvvvvuu... (phone rings) No, fine thanks... (glass of water gag repeats) + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:46.000 + +Look, something's happening to me. I - I - um, I think I'd better go and see someone. Goodnight. + +00:00:46.000 --> 00:00:50.000 +[He runs out; chases and leaps onto passing milk float.] + +00:00:50.000 --> 00:00:52.500 + +Oi, haven't I seen you somewhere before? + +00:00:52.500 --> 00:00:55.000 + +No, doctor, no. Something very funny's happening to me. + +00:00:55.000 --> 00:01:00.000 +[Montage title again; repeat of float sequence with same lines.] + +00:01:00.000 --> 00:01:02.500 + +Oi, haven't I seen you somewhere before? + +00:01:02.500 --> 00:01:05.000 + +No, doctor, no. Something very funny's happening to me. + +00:01:05.000 --> 00:01:12.000 +[Float passes background landmarks: clearing, bishop, secretary, 'to the zoo' explosions; stops at Dr Cream's building.] + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:14.500 + +(camp) 'Oh, Mr Belpit, your legs are so swollen.' + +00:01:14.500 --> 00:01:18.000 +[Boniface runs into office.] + +00:01:18.000 --> 00:01:21.000 + +Ah, come in. Now what seems to be the matter? + +00:01:21.000 --> 00:01:23.500 + +I have this terrible feeling of déjà vu. + +00:01:23.500 --> 00:01:26.500 +[Repeat same clip.] + +00:01:26.500 --> 00:01:29.000 + +Ah, come in. Now what seems to be the matter? + +00:01:29.000 --> 00:01:31.500 + +I have this terrible feeling of déjà vu.. + +00:01:31.500 --> 00:01:35.000 +[Repeat clip again as SUPERIMPOSED CREDITS roll.] + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_17_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Episode_Seventeen/0_Episode17_head_tail.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_17_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Episode_Seventeen/0_Episode17_head_tail.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..86d9fd27 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_17_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Episode_Seventeen/0_Episode17_head_tail.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,39 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Intro titles, announcer, It's Man, opening apology, and end credits. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:03.000 +[Animated item: the Butterfly. The announcer's desk with propellers rises into view.] + +00:00:03.000 --> 00:00:05.500 + +And now for something completely different. + +00:00:05.500 --> 00:00:07.000 + +It's... + +00:00:07.000 --> 00:00:10.000 +[Animated titles sequence.] + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:13.500 +[CAPTION:] 'THE BBC WOULD LIKE TO APOLOGIZE FOR THE NEXT ANNOUNCEMENT' + +00:00:13.500 --> 00:00:18.000 +[A group of Gumbys attempt to shout in unison, failing miserably.] + +00:24:30.000 --> 00:24:34.000 + +And now for something completely different. + +00:24:34.000 --> 00:24:38.000 + +[Jump cut to female Gumbys; then back to original shot.] Oh that was fun. And now... + +00:24:38.000 --> 00:24:41.000 +[CAPTION:] 'THE END' + +00:24:41.000 --> 00:24:47.000 + +The end. The end! The end! The end! + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_17_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Episode_Seventeen/10_Vox_pops_on_aftershave.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_17_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Episode_Seventeen/10_Vox_pops_on_aftershave.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..7b191ea3 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_17_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Episode_Seventeen/10_Vox_pops_on_aftershave.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,74 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Begins at anchor #11; cutaways of people answering what they use for aftershave; chemist trips to Kensington and back; time skip. + +00:18:49.500 --> 00:18:52.500 + +[An assistant hurriedly dressed hands the man a message on a long stick.] Oh... I wonder what other people use for aftershave lotion? + +00:18:52.500 --> 00:18:56.000 + +[Cut to vox pops.] I use a body rub called Halitosis to make my breath seem sweet. + +00:18:56.000 --> 00:18:58.500 + +I use an aftershave called Semprini. + +00:18:58.500 --> 00:19:01.000 +[He is hauled off by policeman.] + +00:19:01.000 --> 00:19:04.000 + +[hurrying past] I'm sorry, sorry - can't stop now, I've got to get to Kensington. + +00:19:04.000 --> 00:19:10.000 + +I use two kinds of aftershave lotions - Frankincense, Myrrh - three kinds of aftershave lotions, Frankincense, Myrrh, Sandalwood - four kinds of aftershave lotion. Frankincense, .... + +00:19:10.000 --> 00:19:15.000 + +I have a cold shower every morning just before I go mad, and then I go mad, 1. Mad, 2. Mad, 3. Mad, 4... + +00:19:15.000 --> 00:19:18.000 + +I use Rancid Polecat number two. It keeps my skin nice and scaly. + +00:19:18.000 --> 00:19:20.500 + +[hurrying past] Sorry again. Can't stop - got to get back. + +00:19:20.500 --> 00:19:25.000 +[Back to chemist's: the man advances the clock's minute hand. CAPTION: '20 MINS LATER'] + +00:19:25.000 --> 00:19:29.000 + +[He looks guiltily at camera and returns to counter. The chemist enters.] Well I'm afraid they don't have any at our Kensington branch. But we have some down at the depot. + +00:19:29.000 --> 00:19:30.500 + +Where's that? + +00:19:30.500 --> 00:19:32.000 + +Aberdeen. + +00:19:32.000 --> 00:19:33.500 + +Aberdeen? + +00:19:33.500 --> 00:19:36.000 + +It's all right. Wait here ... I've got a car. + +00:19:36.000 --> 00:19:40.000 + +No, no, no. I'll take the other, the crab, tiger and... + +00:19:40.000 --> 00:19:42.000 + +Almond requisite... t... t... ? + +00:19:42.000 --> 00:19:44.000 + +I'll take it. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_17_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Episode_Seventeen/11_Police_Constable_Pan-Am.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_17_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Episode_Seventeen/11_Police_Constable_Pan-Am.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..40845882 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_17_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Episode_Seventeen/11_Police_Constable_Pan-Am.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,99 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Begins at anchor #12; shoplifter with many arms, absurd policeman, apology to police and Buzz Aldrin tag. + +00:19:44.000 --> 00:19:52.000 +[Chemist turns his back. A 'man' in a giant mac enters—two men inside, with false arms behind his back like the Duke of Edinburgh. Extra black arm appears. All arms steal items. The customer alerts chemist; chemist blows whistle.] + +00:19:52.000 --> 00:19:56.000 + +[Policeman runs in.] Right. Right! RIGHT! Now then! Now then! Your turn. + +00:19:56.000 --> 00:19:58.000 + +Aren't you going to say 'What's all this then?'? + +00:19:58.000 --> 00:20:00.000 + +Oh! Right, what's all this, then? + +00:20:00.000 --> 00:20:02.500 + +This man has been shoplifting, officer. + +00:20:02.500 --> 00:20:04.500 + +Oh, he has? Yus? + +00:20:04.500 --> 00:20:06.000 + +Yes. + +00:20:06.000 --> 00:20:09.000 + +Are you trying to tell me my job? + +00:20:09.000 --> 00:20:11.500 + +No, but he's been shoplifting. + +00:20:11.500 --> 00:20:18.000 + +Look! I must warn you that anything you may say will be ignored and furthermore, given half a chance I'll put my fist through your teeth. F'tang. F'tang. + +00:20:18.000 --> 00:20:20.500 + +But officer, this man here... + +00:20:20.500 --> 00:20:23.000 + +I've had enough of you. You're under arrest. + +00:20:23.000 --> 00:20:25.000 +[He makes noises of a plane flying and firing.] + +00:20:25.000 --> 00:20:29.000 + +Officer, it wasn't him. [indicates shoplifter] He's the shoplifter. + +00:20:29.000 --> 00:20:30.500 + +No I'm not. + +00:20:30.500 --> 00:20:33.000 + +[sticking his head out of mac] He's not ... I'm a witness. + +00:20:33.000 --> 00:20:37.000 + +[to chemist] One more peep out of you and I'll do you for heresy. + +00:20:37.000 --> 00:20:40.000 + +Heresy. Blimey. I didn't expect the Spanish Inquisition. + +00:20:40.000 --> 00:20:45.000 + +Shut up! F'tang. F'tang. Oh, that's nice. [pockets an object from the counter] Right. I'm taking you along to the station. + +00:20:45.000 --> 00:20:46.500 + +What for? + +00:20:46.500 --> 00:20:55.000 + +I'm charging you with illegal possession of whatever we happen to have down there. Right. [plane noise again] Lunar module calling Buzz Aldrin. Come in. Raindrops keep falling on my head... but that doesn't mean that my... + +00:20:55.000 --> 00:20:58.000 +[CAPTION:] 'AN APOLOGY' + +00:20:58.000 --> 00:21:06.000 + +The BBC would like to apologize to the police about the character of Police Constable Pan Am. He was not meant to represent the average police officer. Similarly, the reference to Buzz Aldrin, the astronaut, was the product of a disordered mind and should not be construed as having any other significance. + +00:21:06.000 --> 00:21:09.000 +[Photo of Buzz Aldrin.] + +00:21:09.000 --> 00:21:15.000 +[CAPTION:] 'THE BUZZ ALDRIN SHOW STARRING BUZZ ALDRIN WITH... (CREDITS)' + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_17_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Episode_Seventeen/1_Architect_sketch.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_17_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Episode_Seventeen/1_Architect_sketch.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..e7f259ad --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_17_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Episode_Seventeen/1_Architect_sketch.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,158 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Begins at anchor #1 introduced by Gumbys. + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:26.000 + +Hello, and welcome to the show. Without more ado, the first item is a sketch about architects, called The Architects Sketch... The Architects Sketch... The Architects Sketch... [as the sketch fails to start they point up at a nearby building] Up there!... Up there!... Up there! + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:31.000 +[Camera pans to a window in the building. Cut to office inside: a board meeting. Chairman is Mr Tid.] + +00:00:31.000 --> 00:00:55.000 + +Gentlemen, we have two basic suggestions for the design of this... [distracted by Gumbys still shouting] ... Gentlemen, we have two basic suggestions for the design of this... [shouts out of window] Shut up! Gentlemen, we have two basic suggestions... [throws a bucket of water over them; they subside] Gentlemen, we have two basic suggestions for the design of this residential block, and I thought it best that the architects themselves came in to explain the advantages of both designs. [knock at door] That must be the first architect now. [Mr Wiggin comes in] Ah, yes - it's Mr Wiggin of Ironside and Malone. + +00:00:55.000 --> 00:00:58.000 +[Wiggin walks to the table where his model stands.] + +00:00:58.000 --> 00:01:30.000 + +Good morning, gentlemen. This is a twelve-storey block combining classical neo-Georgian features with the efficiency of modern techniques. The tenants arrive in the entrance hall here, and are carried along the corridor on a conveyor belt in extreme comfort and past murals depicting Mediterranean scenes, towards the rotating knives. The last twenty feet of the corridor are heavily soundproofed. The blood pours down these chutes and the mangled flesh slurps into these... + +00:01:30.000 --> 00:01:33.000 + +Excuse me.... + +00:01:33.000 --> 00:01:34.500 + +Hm? + +00:01:34.500 --> 00:01:38.000 + +Did you say knives? + +00:01:38.000 --> 00:01:40.000 + +Rotating knives, yes. + +00:01:40.000 --> 00:01:44.000 + +Are you proposing to slaughter our tenants? + +00:01:44.000 --> 00:01:47.000 + +Does that not fit in with your plans? + +00:01:47.000 --> 00:01:53.000 + +No, it does not. We asked for a simple block of flats. + +00:01:53.000 --> 00:02:10.000 + +Oh, I see. I hadn't correctly divined your attitude towards your tenants. You see I mainly design slaughter houses. Yes, pity. Mind you, this is a real beaut. I mean, none of your blood caked on the walls and flesh flying out of the windows, inconveniencing the passers-by with this one. I mean, my life has been building up to this. + +00:02:10.000 --> 00:02:14.000 + +Yes, and well done, but we want a block of flats. + +00:02:14.000 --> 00:02:20.000 + +May I ask you to reconsider. I mean, you wouldn't regret it. Think of the tourist trade. + +00:02:20.000 --> 00:02:26.000 + +No, no, it's just that we wanted a block of flats, not an abattoir. + +00:02:26.000 --> 00:02:53.000 + +Yes, well, of course, this is just the sort of blinkered philistine pig ignorance I've come to expect from you non-creative garbage. You sit there on your loathsome, spotty behinds squeezing blackheads, not caring a tinker's cuss about the struggling artist. [shouting] You excrement! You lousy hypocritical whining toadies with your lousy colour TV sets and your Tony Jacklin golf clubs and your bleeding masonic handshakes! You wouldn't let me join, would you, you blackballing bastards. Well I wouldn't become a freemason now if you went down on your lousy, stinking, purulent knees and begged me. + +00:02:53.000 --> 00:02:59.000 + +Well, we're sorry you feel like that but we, er, did want a block of flats. Nice though the abattoir is. + +00:02:59.000 --> 00:03:13.000 + +Oh [blows raspberry] the abattoir, that's not important. But if any of you could put in a word for me I'd love to be a freemason. Freemasonry opens doors. I mean, I was... I was a bit on edge just now, but if I were a mason I'd sit at the back and not get in anyone's way. + +00:03:13.000 --> 00:03:15.000 + +Thank you. + +00:03:15.000 --> 00:03:17.000 + +I've got a second-hand apron. + +00:03:17.000 --> 00:03:18.500 + +Thank you. + +00:03:18.500 --> 00:03:21.500 + +[going to door but stopping] I nearly got in at Hendon. + +00:03:21.500 --> 00:03:23.000 + +Thank you. + +00:03:23.000 --> 00:03:27.000 + +[Mr Wiggin leaves. Mr Tid steps forward.] I'm sorry about that, gentlemen. The second architect is Mr Leavey of Wymis and Dibble. + +00:03:27.000 --> 00:03:30.000 +[Mr Leavey comes in and goes to his model.] + +00:03:30.000 --> 00:04:10.000 + +Good morning gentlemen. This is a scale model of the block. There are twenty-eight storeys, with two hundred and eighty modern apartments. There are three main lifts and two service lifts. Access would be from Dibbingley Road. [model falls over; he puts it upright] The structure is built on a central pillar system [model falls again] with [holds model] cantilevered floors in pre-stressed steel and concrete. The dividing walls on each floor section are fixed by recessed magnalium flanged grooves. [bottom ten floors collapse] By avoiding wood and timber derivatives and all other flammables [model smokes; flames seen] we have almost totally removed the risk of... + +00:04:10.000 --> 00:04:12.500 +[CAPTION:] 'SATIRE' + +00:04:12.500 --> 00:04:16.000 + +Quite frankly, I think the central pillar system may need strengthening a bit. + +00:04:16.000 --> 00:04:18.500 + +Isn't that going to put the cost up? + +00:04:18.500 --> 00:04:20.000 + +It might. + +00:04:20.000 --> 00:04:26.000 + +Well, I don't know whether I'd worry about strengthening that much. After all, they're not meant to be luxury flats. + +00:04:26.000 --> 00:04:33.000 + +I quite agree. I mean, providing the tenants are of light build and relatively sedentary and, er, given a spot of good weather, I think we're on to a winner here. + +00:04:33.000 --> 00:04:35.000 + +Thank you. + +00:04:35.000 --> 00:04:38.000 +[The model explodes.] + +00:04:38.000 --> 00:04:40.000 + +Quite agree. Quite agree. + +00:04:40.000 --> 00:04:46.000 + +Thank you very much. Thank you. [he shakes hands with them in an extraordinary way] + +00:04:46.000 --> 00:04:48.500 + +[at door] It opens doors, I'm telling you. + +00:04:48.500 --> 00:04:52.000 + +Let's have a look at that handshake again in slow motion. + +00:04:52.000 --> 00:04:56.500 +[CAPTION:] 'BBC TV ACTION REPLAY' [They do the handshake again, slowly.] + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_17_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Episode_Seventeen/2_How_to_give_up_being_a_Mason.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_17_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Episode_Seventeen/2_How_to_give_up_being_a_Mason.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..a5370b24 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_17_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Episode_Seventeen/2_How_to_give_up_being_a_Mason.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,36 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Begins at anchor #2 with voice-over Q&A and therapy sequence. + +00:04:56.500 --> 00:05:01.000 + +What other ways are there of recognizing a mason? + +00:05:01.000 --> 00:05:10.000 +[Hidden camera shots: busy city street; four city gents leap along with trousers round ankles. Elsewhere, two gents perform an elaborate handshake, rolling on the floor, etc.] + +00:05:10.000 --> 00:05:28.000 + +Having once identified a mason immediate steps must be taken to isolate him from the general public. Having accomplished that it is now possible to cure him of these unfortunate masonic tendencies through the use of behavioural psychotherapy. [we see a cartoon city gent locked into a cell] In this treatment the patient is rewarded for the correct response and punished for the wrong one. Let us begin. Would you like to give up being a mason? Think carefully. Think. Think. + +00:05:28.000 --> 00:05:30.000 + +No. + +00:05:30.000 --> 00:05:34.000 +[A large hammer attacks the city gent.] + +00:05:34.000 --> 00:05:40.000 + +No? That's wrong! Wrong! Wrong! Wrong! No! No! No! Bad! Bad! + +00:05:40.000 --> 00:05:43.000 +[CAPTION:] 'AN APOLOGY' + +00:05:43.000 --> 00:05:47.000 + +The BBC would like to apologize for the following announcement. + +00:05:47.000 --> 00:05:58.000 +[Pull out to reveal the 'AN APOLOGY' is a huge poster on a roadside hoarding. We hear shuffling and grunting. A group of Gumbys shuffle into extreme left edge of frame and hover, humming and harring.] + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_17_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Episode_Seventeen/3_Motor_insurance_sketch.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_17_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Episode_Seventeen/3_Motor_insurance_sketch.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..82fa39fa --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_17_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Episode_Seventeen/3_Motor_insurance_sketch.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,218 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Begins at anchor #3 announced by Gumbys; Devious insurance office and vicar. + +00:05:58.000 --> 00:06:05.000 + +Oh! And the next item is called 'Insurance Sketch'. 'Insurance Sketch'. 'Insurance Sketch'... + +00:06:05.000 --> 00:06:09.000 +[Cut to Mr Devious's insurance office. Devious and a man are seated.] + +00:06:09.000 --> 00:06:11.500 + +What do you want? + +00:06:11.500 --> 00:06:13.500 +[CAPTION:] 'STRAIGHT MAN' + +00:06:13.500 --> 00:06:18.500 + +Well I've come about your special fully comprehensive motor insurance policy offer... + +00:06:18.500 --> 00:06:20.500 + +What was that? + +00:06:20.500 --> 00:06:24.500 + +Fully comprehensive motor insurance for one-and-eightpence. + +00:06:24.500 --> 00:06:33.000 + +Oh, oh, yes... yeah well, unfortunately, guv, that offer's no longer valid. You see, it turned out not to be commercially viable, so we now have a totally new offer... + +00:06:33.000 --> 00:06:34.500 + +What's that? + +00:06:34.500 --> 00:06:36.500 + +A nude lady. + +00:06:36.500 --> 00:06:38.500 + +A nude lady? + +00:06:38.500 --> 00:06:47.000 + +Yes. You get a nude lady with a fully comprehensive motor insurance. If you just want third party she has to keep her bra on, and if it's just theft... + +00:06:47.000 --> 00:06:53.000 + +No, no, I don't really want that, Mr er... Mr... + +00:06:53.000 --> 00:06:54.500 + +Devious. + +00:06:54.500 --> 00:07:02.000 + +Mr Devious. I just want to know what it would cost me to have a fully comprehensive insurance on a 1970 Aston Martin. + +00:07:02.000 --> 00:07:03.500 + +Aston Martin? + +00:07:03.500 --> 00:07:05.000 + +Yes. + +00:07:05.000 --> 00:07:07.000 + +[quickly] Five hundred quid. + +00:07:07.000 --> 00:07:08.500 + +Five hundred quid? + +00:07:08.500 --> 00:07:10.000 + +Forty quid. + +00:07:10.000 --> 00:07:11.500 + +Forty quid? + +00:07:11.500 --> 00:07:14.000 + +Forty quid and a nude lady. + +00:07:14.000 --> 00:07:17.000 + +No, no, I'm not interested in a nude lady. + +00:07:17.000 --> 00:07:18.500 + +Dirty books? + +00:07:18.500 --> 00:07:29.000 + +No, no, look, I'm not interested in any of that. [CAPTION 'STRAIGHT MAN' reappears] I just want to know what it would cost me to have a fully comprehensive insurance on a 1970 Aston Martin. Can you please quote me your price. + +00:07:29.000 --> 00:07:31.000 +[Outside the door of the office, a vicar stands.] + +00:07:31.000 --> 00:07:32.500 + +Knock knock. + +00:07:32.500 --> 00:07:34.000 + +[Cut to inside office.] Who's there + +00:07:34.000 --> 00:07:36.000 + +[Outside.] The Reverend... + +00:07:36.000 --> 00:07:38.000 + +[Inside.] The Reverend who? + +00:07:38.000 --> 00:07:40.000 + +The reverend Morrison. + +00:07:40.000 --> 00:07:43.000 +[CAPTION:] 'ANOTHER STRAIGHT MAN' [The vicar enters.] + +00:07:43.000 --> 00:07:45.000 + +Oh, come in. + +00:07:45.000 --> 00:07:48.500 + +Now then, vic. What's the trouble? + +00:07:48.500 --> 00:07:52.000 + +Well, it's about this letter you sent me. + +00:07:52.000 --> 00:07:55.000 + +Excuse me, do I have any more lines? + +00:07:55.000 --> 00:08:02.000 + +I don't know, mush, I'll have to look in the script... [he gets script out of drawer] Where are we? Show 8. Are you 'man'? + +00:08:02.000 --> 00:08:03.500 + +Yeah. + +00:08:03.500 --> 00:08:05.500 + +No... no, you're finished. + +00:08:05.500 --> 00:08:08.000 + +Well, I'll be off then. + +00:08:08.000 --> 00:08:10.000 + +[reading script] 'The vicar sits'. + +00:08:10.000 --> 00:08:12.000 +[The vicar sits.] + +00:08:12.000 --> 00:08:16.000 + +It's about this letter you sent me regarding my insurance claim. + +00:08:16.000 --> 00:08:23.000 + +Oh, yeah, yeah - well, you see, it's just that we're not... as yet... totally satisfied with the grounds of your claim. + +00:08:23.000 --> 00:08:26.000 + +But it says something about filling my mouth in with cement. + +00:08:26.000 --> 00:08:30.000 + +Oh well, that's just insurance jargon, you know. + +00:08:30.000 --> 00:08:36.000 + +But my car was hit by a lorry while standing in the garage and you refuse to pay my claim. + +00:08:36.000 --> 00:08:52.000 + +[rising; to filing cabinet] Oh well, reverend Morrison... in your policy... in your policy... [opens drawer; takes out shabby old sports jacket; rummages in pocket; produces crumpled dog-eared paper; replaces coat and shuts drawer] ... here we are. It states quite clearly that no claim you make will be paid. + +00:08:52.000 --> 00:08:53.500 + +Oh dear. + +00:08:53.500 --> 00:09:02.000 + +You see, you unfortunately plumped for our 'Neverpay' policy, which, you know, if you never claim is very worthwhile... but you had to claim, and, well, there it is. + +00:09:02.000 --> 00:09:03.500 + +Oh dear, oh dear. + +00:09:03.500 --> 00:09:08.000 + +Still, never mind - could be worse. How's the nude lady? + +00:09:08.000 --> 00:09:11.000 + +Oh, she's fine. [begins to sob] + +00:09:11.000 --> 00:09:16.000 + +Look... Rev... I hate to see a man cry, so shove off out the office, there's a good chap. + +00:09:16.000 --> 00:09:25.000 +[Outside: Vicar collects a nude lady in a supermarket trolley and wheels her away disconsolately. Inside: Devious resumes work. Suddenly a bishop's crook slams down on the desk. He looks up in terror.] + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_17_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Episode_Seventeen/4_The_Bishop.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_17_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Episode_Seventeen/4_The_Bishop.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..245db6f9 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_17_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Episode_Seventeen/4_The_Bishop.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,98 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Begins at anchor #4; C. of E. action series parody with multiple church set-pieces. + +00:09:25.000 --> 00:09:28.000 + +OK, Devious... Don't move! + +00:09:28.000 --> 00:09:30.000 + +The bishop! + +00:09:30.000 --> 00:09:40.000 +[Animated crime-series-style titles: 'C. OF E. FILMS' ... 'THE BISHOP' ... credits roll.] + +00:09:40.000 --> 00:09:55.000 +[Exterior: beautiful English church; birds singing, hymn. A huge American car screeches up. The Bishop and four vicar henchmen in dark glasses rush toward the church as the hymn ends.] + +00:09:55.000 --> 00:09:58.000 + +[Interior church: vicar climbs into pulpit.] I take as my text for today... + +00:09:58.000 --> 00:10:01.000 + +[At doorway] The text, vic! Don't say the text! + +00:10:01.000 --> 00:10:04.000 + +Leviticus 3-14... + +00:10:04.000 --> 00:10:08.000 +[The pulpit explodes. Smoke and panic ensue.] + +00:10:08.000 --> 00:10:11.000 + +We was too late. The Reverend Grundy bit the ceiling. + +00:10:11.000 --> 00:10:16.000 + +[The end of the bishop's crook flashes; he lifts it like a phone.] Hello? ... What?... We'll be right over! + +00:10:16.000 --> 00:10:28.000 +[Another church: baptism party at the font. Shifty parents and two wrestler godmothers. The baby ticks loudly.] + +00:10:28.000 --> 00:10:36.000 + +And it is for this reason that the Christian Church lays upon you, the godparents, the obligation of seeing this child is brought up in the Christian faith. Therefore, I name this child... + +00:10:36.000 --> 00:10:38.500 + +Don't say the kid's name, vic! + +00:10:38.500 --> 00:10:40.500 + +Francesco Luigi... + +00:10:40.500 --> 00:10:43.500 +[Explosion. Smoke and panic.] + +00:10:43.500 --> 00:10:46.500 + +We was too late... The Rev. Neuk saw the light. + +00:10:46.500 --> 00:10:58.000 + +[Wedding: vicar with bride and groom. Bishop bursts in.] The ring, vic! Don't touch the ring! Hey vic! + +00:10:58.000 --> 00:11:05.000 +[Vicar lifts ring from Bible; it's on a string. A sixteen-ton weight drops onto them with a mighty crunch. Cut to bell ringers: one pulls rope, the other rises hanged. Bishop arrives too late.] + +00:11:05.000 --> 00:11:12.000 + +[Graveside: vicar sprinkles dust.] ... dust to dust, ashes to ashes. + +00:11:12.000 --> 00:11:21.000 +[A huge cannon rises from the grave, barrel in vicar's face. Bishop car screeches up. An almighty blast. Bishop immediately turns the car around.] + +00:11:21.000 --> 00:11:32.000 +[Street: outside a cigarette shop the clerics lounge. Bishop rolls his own. He hears a faint cry, looks up to a high office window.] + +00:11:32.000 --> 00:11:36.000 + +Help ... help... help... help... help... help... + +00:11:36.000 --> 00:11:50.000 +[Peter Gunn music. Hand-held chase through crowded streets. Stairwell run. Door won't open. One vicar goes rigid; others use him as a battering ram through the balsa door.] + +00:11:50.000 --> 00:11:52.500 + +OK, Devious, don't move! + +00:11:52.500 --> 00:11:54.000 + +The bishop! + +00:11:54.000 --> 00:11:59.000 +[‘The Bishop’ titles again.] + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_17_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Episode_Seventeen/5_Living_room_on_pavement.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_17_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Episode_Seventeen/5_Living_room_on_pavement.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..9b74c96a --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_17_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Episode_Seventeen/5_Living_room_on_pavement.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,80 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Begins at anchor #5; cinema couple transition to pavement living room and Poet service. + +00:11:59.000 --> 00:12:03.000 + +This is where we came in. + +00:12:03.000 --> 00:12:04.500 + +Yes. + +00:12:04.500 --> 00:12:16.000 +[Cut to outside the cinema: a working-class lounge arranged on the pavement—settee, armchairs, sideboard, table, standard lamp, tiled fireplace, and a freestanding interior door. Passers-by skirt around the furniture. The Potters sit.] + +00:12:16.000 --> 00:12:19.500 + +[settling into her chair] Oh, it's nice to be home. + +00:12:19.500 --> 00:12:22.500 + +[looking round] Builders haven't been then. + +00:12:22.500 --> 00:12:24.000 + +No. + +00:12:24.000 --> 00:12:28.000 + +[A trendy interviewer with hand mic enters frame.] These two old people are typical of the housing problem facing Britain's aged. + +00:12:28.000 --> 00:12:31.000 + +Here! Don't you start doing a documentary on us, young man. + +00:12:31.000 --> 00:12:33.000 + +Oh please ... + +00:12:33.000 --> 00:12:36.000 + +No, you leave us alone! + +00:12:36.000 --> 00:12:40.000 + +Oh, just a little one about the appalling conditions under which you live. + +00:12:40.000 --> 00:12:43.000 + +No! Get out of our house! Go on! + +00:12:43.000 --> 00:12:48.000 +[Interviewer, cameraman, and soundman trail off miserably.] + +00:12:48.000 --> 00:12:51.000 + +Why don't you do a documentary about the drug problem round in Walton Street? + +00:12:51.000 --> 00:12:55.000 +[Crew stops, perk up at 'drug problem!', and dash off.] + +00:12:55.000 --> 00:12:58.000 + +Oh, I'll go and have a bath. + +00:12:58.000 --> 00:13:05.000 + +[She opens the freestanding door revealing a bathroom. Alfred Lord Tennyson is fully clothed in the bath, reciting.] The splendour falls on castle walls And snowy summits old in story... + +00:13:05.000 --> 00:13:07.000 +[She slams the door.] + +00:13:07.000 --> 00:13:10.000 + +'Ere, there's Alfred Lord Tennyson in the bathroom. + +00:13:10.000 --> 00:13:13.000 + +Well, at least the poet's been installed, then. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_17_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Episode_Seventeen/6_Poets.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_17_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Episode_Seventeen/6_Poets.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..42cf8c4b --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_17_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Episode_Seventeen/6_Poets.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,64 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Begins at anchor #6; Poet Board sales manager, advert, inspector reads Wordsworth, living-room chat. + +00:13:13.000 --> 00:13:20.000 +[CAPTION:] 'SALES MANAGER EAST MIDLANDS POET BOARD' [Officious man in utility uniform addresses camera.] + +00:13:20.000 --> 00:13:28.000 + +Yes, a poet is essential for complete home comfort, and all-year round reliability at low cost. We in the East Midlands Poet Board hope to have a poet in every home by the end of next year. + +00:13:28.000 --> 00:13:36.000 +[ANIMATION: advertisement sting.] + +00:13:36.000 --> 00:13:44.000 +[singing] Poets are both clean and warm And most are far above the norm Whether here, or on the roam Have a poet in every home. + +00:13:44.000 --> 00:13:49.000 + +[Middle-class hall. Doorbell. Housewife opens to inspector. Muffled Wordsworth is heard.] I wandered lonely as a cloud That floats on high... + +00:13:49.000 --> 00:13:52.000 + +Morning, madam, I've come to read your poet. + +00:13:52.000 --> 00:13:55.000 + +Oh yes, he's in the cupboard under the stairs. + +00:13:55.000 --> 00:13:58.000 + +What is it, a Swinburne? Shelley? + +00:13:58.000 --> 00:14:00.000 + +No, it's a Wordsworth. + +00:14:00.000 --> 00:14:02.000 + +Oh, bloody daffodils. + +00:14:02.000 --> 00:14:07.000 + +[He opens cupboard: Wordsworth crouches, reciting.] A host of golden daffodils Beside the lake, beneath the trees Fluttering and dancing in the breeze + +00:14:07.000 --> 00:14:12.000 + +Continuous as the stars that shine And twinkle in the Milky Way They stretch in... + +00:14:12.000 --> 00:14:14.000 +[Inspector shuts the door mid-line; Wordsworth continues, muffled, throughout.] + +00:14:14.000 --> 00:14:16.500 + +Right. Thank you, madam. + +00:14:16.500 --> 00:14:20.500 + +[blocking his exit] Oh, not at all. Thank you... It's a nice day, isn't it? + +00:14:20.500 --> 00:14:38.000 + +Yes, yes, the weather situation is generally favourable. There's a ridge of high pressure centred over Ireland which is moving steadily eastward bringing cloudy weather to parts of the West Country, Wales and areas west of the Pennines. On tomorrow's chart... [pulls down a big weather chart] the picture is much the same. With this occluded front bringing drier, warmer weather. Temperatures about average for the time of year. That's three degrees centigrade, forty-four degrees fahrenheit, so don't forget to wrap up well. That's all from me. Goodnight. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_17_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Episode_Seventeen/7_A_choice_of_viewing.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_17_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Episode_Seventeen/7_A_choice_of_viewing.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..d904adc2 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_17_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Episode_Seventeen/7_A_choice_of_viewing.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,114 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Begins at anchor #7; continuity announcement, TV off gag, flirty homeowner and inspector, cut to studio discussion. + +00:14:38.000 --> 00:14:43.000 + +[BBC world symbol.] Now on BBC television a choice of viewing. On BBC 2 - a discussion on censorship between Derek Hart, The Bishop of Woolwich and a nude man. And on BBC 1 - me telling you this. And now... + +00:14:43.000 --> 00:14:48.000 +[Sound of TV switched off; picture reduces to a spot. Pull out to reveal housewife and inspector on sofa with tea (cherry on a stick).] + +00:14:48.000 --> 00:14:54.000 + +We don't want that, do we. Do you really want that cherry in your tea? Do you like doing this job? + +00:14:54.000 --> 00:14:57.000 + +Well, it's a living, isn't it? + +00:14:57.000 --> 00:15:01.000 + +I mean, don't you get bored reading people's poets all day? + +00:15:01.000 --> 00:15:05.000 + +Well, you know, sometimes ... yeah. Anyway, I think I'd better be going. + +00:15:05.000 --> 00:15:08.500 + +[seductively] You've got a nice torch, haven't you? + +00:15:08.500 --> 00:15:12.000 + +[baffled, looking at torch] Er, yeah, yeah, it er... it er ... it goes on and off. + +00:15:12.000 --> 00:15:13.500 +[He demonstrates.] + +00:15:13.500 --> 00:15:16.000 + +[drawing closer, breathy] How many volts is it? + +00:15:16.000 --> 00:15:20.000 + +Er ... um... well, I'll have a look at the batteries. [unscrews end] + +00:15:20.000 --> 00:15:21.500 + +Oh yes, yes. + +00:15:21.500 --> 00:15:23.500 + +It's four and a half volts. + +00:15:23.500 --> 00:15:27.000 + +[rubbing up against him] Mmmm. That's wonderful. Do you want another look at the poet? + +00:15:27.000 --> 00:15:29.000 + +No, no, I must be off, really. + +00:15:29.000 --> 00:15:33.000 + +I've got Thomas Hardy in the bedroom. I'd like you to look at him. + +00:15:33.000 --> 00:15:35.000 + +Ah well, I can't touch him. He's a novelist. + +00:15:35.000 --> 00:15:37.500 + +Oh, he keeps mumbling all night. + +00:15:37.500 --> 00:15:39.500 + +Oh well, novelists do, you see. + +00:15:39.500 --> 00:15:43.000 + +[dragging him onto the sofa] Oh forget him! What's your name, deary? + +00:15:43.000 --> 00:15:44.500 + +Harness. + +00:15:44.500 --> 00:15:46.500 + +No, no! Your first name, silly! + +00:15:46.500 --> 00:15:48.500 + +Wombat. + +00:15:48.500 --> 00:15:58.000 + +Oh, Wombat. Wombat Harness! Take me to the place where eternity knows no bounds, where the garden of love encloses us round. Oh Harness! + +00:15:58.000 --> 00:16:01.000 + +All right, I'll have a quick look at yer Thomas Hardy. + +00:16:01.000 --> 00:16:05.000 + +[Cut to studio discussion. CAPTION: 'DEREK HART'] Nude man, what did you make of that? + +00:16:05.000 --> 00:16:15.000 + +Well, don't you see, that was exactly the kind of explicit sexual reference I'm objecting to. It's titillation for the sake of it. A deliberate attempt at cheap sensationalism. I don't care what the so-called avant-garde, left-wing, intellectual namby-pambies say... It is filth! + +00:16:15.000 --> 00:16:16.500 + +Bishop. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_17_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Episode_Seventeen/8_Chemist_sketch.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_17_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Episode_Seventeen/8_Chemist_sketch.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..35ea41cd --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_17_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Episode_Seventeen/8_Chemist_sketch.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,55 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Begins at anchor #8; naughty chemist dispensing, apology, banned-words list, return and arrest. + +00:16:16.500 --> 00:16:20.000 + +[Cut to crook hitting desk in Devious's office.] Okay, don't anybody move! + +00:16:20.000 --> 00:16:23.000 +[Titles for 'The Bishop' start then stop abruptly. CAPTION: 'AN APOLOGY'] + +00:16:23.000 --> 00:16:27.000 + +The BBC would like to apologize for the constant repetition in this show. + +00:16:27.000 --> 00:16:30.000 +[DIFFERENT CAPTION: 'AN APOLOGY'] The BBC would like to apologize for the constant repetition in this show. + +00:16:30.000 --> 00:16:36.000 + +[ANIMATION: the 'five frog curse'. Cut to five Gumbys standing together.] Thank you. And now a sketch about a chemist called The Chemist Sketch. + +00:16:36.000 --> 00:16:42.000 + +[Chemist counter area with 'Dispensing Department' sign. A cheerful chemist appears.] Right. I've got some of your prescriptions here. Er, who's got the pox? ... Come on, who's got the pox ... come on... [a timid hand goes up] ... there you go. [throws bottle] Who's got a boil on the bum... boil on the botty. [throws] Who's got the chest rash? [a buxom woman indicates] Have to get a bigger bottle. Who's got wind? [throws] Catch. + +00:16:42.000 --> 00:16:45.000 +[CAPTION:] 'THE CHEMIST SKETCH - AN APOLOGY' + +00:16:45.000 --> 00:16:50.000 + +The BBC would like to apologize for the poor quality of the writing in that sketch. It is not BBC policy to get easy laughs with words like bum, knickers, botty or wee-wees. [laughs off camera] Ssssh! + +00:16:50.000 --> 00:16:53.000 + +[Cut to man by a screen with a clicker.] These are the words that are not to be used again on this programme. + +00:16:53.000 --> 00:16:58.000 +[Slides appear: B*M; B*TTY; P*X; KN*CKERS; W**-W**; SEMPRINI] + +00:16:58.000 --> 00:17:00.000 + +Semprini!? + +00:17:00.000 --> 00:17:02.000 + +[pointing] Out! + +00:17:02.000 --> 00:17:06.000 + +[Back to chemist's shop; the chemist reappears.] Right, who's got a boil on his Semprini, then? + +00:17:06.000 --> 00:17:09.000 +[A policeman bundles him off. Cut to another chemist's with a different chemist. CAPTION: 'A LESS NAUGHTY CHEMIST'S'] + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_17_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Episode_Seventeen/9_After-shave.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_17_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Episode_Seventeen/9_After-shave.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..bb1a54a8 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_17_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Episode_Seventeen/9_After-shave.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,130 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Begins at anchor #10; fishy aftershaves, fourth wall gags, Kensington and Aberdeen run. + +00:17:09.000 --> 00:17:10.500 + +Good morning. + +00:17:10.500 --> 00:17:12.500 + +Good morning, sir. + +00:17:12.500 --> 00:17:15.500 + +Good morning. I'd like some aftershave, please. + +00:17:15.500 --> 00:17:17.500 + +Ah, certainly. Walk this way, please. + +00:17:17.500 --> 00:17:20.000 + +If I could walk that way I wouldn't need aftershave. + +00:17:20.000 --> 00:17:23.000 +[Policeman runs in and hauls the man off. Cut to shop again. CAPTION: 'A NOT AT ALL NAUGHTY CHEMIST'S'] + +00:17:23.000 --> 00:17:26.000 + +Good morning. + +00:17:26.000 --> 00:17:30.000 + +[puts down sign] Good morning, sir. Can I help you? + +00:17:30.000 --> 00:17:32.000 + +Yes. I'd like some aftershave. + +00:17:32.000 --> 00:17:38.000 + +Ah. A toilet requisite-t-t-t-t-t... Would you like to try this, sir. It's our very very latest, it's called Sea Mist. + +00:17:38.000 --> 00:17:40.000 + +[sniffs it] I quite like it. + +00:17:40.000 --> 00:17:44.000 + +How about something a little more musky? This one's called Mimmo. + +00:17:44.000 --> 00:17:46.000 + +Not really, no. Have you anything a little more fishier? + +00:17:46.000 --> 00:17:47.500 + +Fishier? + +00:17:47.500 --> 00:17:49.000 + +Fishier. + +00:17:49.000 --> 00:17:52.000 + +Fish, fish, fish. A fishy requisite-t-t-t-t-t... + +00:17:52.000 --> 00:17:54.000 + +Like halibut or sea bass. + +00:17:54.000 --> 00:17:55.500 + +Or bream? + +00:17:55.500 --> 00:17:57.000 + +Yes. + +00:17:57.000 --> 00:18:01.000 + +No, we haven't got any of that... ah, I've got mackerel... or cod... or hake... + +00:18:01.000 --> 00:18:04.000 + +You haven't got anything a little more halibutish? + +00:18:04.000 --> 00:18:10.000 + +Er... parrot? What's that doing there? Or skate with just a hint of prawn? Or crab, tiger and almonds, very unusual. + +00:18:10.000 --> 00:18:12.500 + +I really had my heart set on halibut. + +00:18:12.500 --> 00:18:20.000 + +Well, sir, we had a fishy consignment in this morning, so I could nip down to the basement and see if I can come up trumps on this particular requisite-t-t-t-t-t. So it was halibut... or... ? + +00:18:20.000 --> 00:18:21.500 + +Sea bass. + +00:18:21.500 --> 00:18:23.500 + +Sea bass. Won't be a moment. + +00:18:23.500 --> 00:18:32.000 + +[The man waits, grows uncomfortable, checks watch, hums.] Sorry about this... pom pom pom... Normally we try to avoid these little ... pauses ... longeurs... only dramatically he's gone down to the basement, you see. 'Course, there isn't really a basement but he just goes off and we pretend... Actually what happens is he goes off there, off camera, and just waits there so it looks as though he's gone down ... to the basement. Actually I think he's rather overdoing it. Ah! + +00:18:32.000 --> 00:18:36.000 +[Long shot: chemist waits off camera with carton. Floor manager cues him; he walks to counter.] + +00:18:36.000 --> 00:18:44.000 + +Well, sorry, sir. [out of breath] Lot of steps. [man winks at camera] Well, I'm afraid it didn't come in this morning, sir. But we have got some down at our Kensington branch. I'll just nip down there and get it for you. + +00:18:44.000 --> 00:18:46.000 + +How long will that be? + +00:18:46.000 --> 00:18:47.500 + +Twenty minutes. + +00:18:47.500 --> 00:18:49.500 + +Twenty minutes! + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_18_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/0_Episode18_head_tail.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_18_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/0_Episode18_head_tail.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..29f5ec30 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_18_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/0_Episode18_head_tail.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,66 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Intro and credits material extracted from page framing and transitions. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 +[action] BBC world symbol appears + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:09.000 + +Monty Python's Flying Circus tonight comes to you live from the Grillomat Snack Bar, Paignton. + +00:00:09.000 --> 00:00:14.000 +[action] Interior of a nasty snack bar; customers around; Linkman at plastic table. + +00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:21.000 + +Hello to you live from the Grillomat Snack Bar, Paignton. And so, without any more ado, let's have the titles. + +00:00:21.000 --> 00:00:23.000 + +It's… + +00:00:23.000 --> 00:00:28.000 +[action] Animated titles roll; cut back to snack bar. + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:45.000 +[action] Linkman, with forced bonhomie, introduces the show's 'menu' and hints anything might happen. + +00:12:00.000 --> 00:12:08.000 + +Ah, hello. Well they certainly seem to be in a tight spot, and I spot… our next item—so let's get straight on with the fun and go over to the next item—or dish! + +00:18:30.000 --> 00:18:40.000 + +Well, they seem to be in another tight spot… Could you keep it down a little, please? Thank you so much… And now we move on to our main course. Prawn salad… Prawn salad? + +00:26:00.000 --> 00:26:08.000 + +Ah well, they seem to have linked that themselves, so there's no need for me to interrupt at all. So, ah, back to the school hall. + +00:34:00.000 --> 00:34:18.000 + +Sorry, I asked for tea… Thank you very much. Well we've had the dessert and so the last item on our menu of fun is the coffee… Now I did ask for tea. + +00:34:18.000 --> 00:34:24.000 + +But you just said coffee. + +00:34:24.000 --> 00:34:32.000 + +No, no, that was just my announcement, just a metaphor. + +00:34:32.000 --> 00:34:40.000 + +We come—as I said just now—to the coffee. + +00:44:30.000 --> 00:44:45.000 + +Oh, er, there you are. Hello. You got the note, jolly good. Well, um, that's all the items that we have for you this week… The same team will be back with you again next week with another menu full of items… + +00:44:45.000 --> 00:45:15.000 +[dialogue] I'm more of a visual performer… very funny walk… the show's over… I wish it would say the end. + +00:45:15.000 --> 00:45:18.000 +[action] Super: The End. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_18_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/1_Live_from_the_Grill-o-Mat_snack_bar,_Paignton.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_18_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/1_Live_from_the_Grill-o-Mat_snack_bar,_Paignton.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..c2e99a1b --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_18_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/1_Live_from_the_Grill-o-Mat_snack_bar,_Paignton.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,28 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Intro link at Grillomat; includes titles gag and menu setup. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:03.500 +[action] BBC world symbol + +00:00:03.500 --> 00:00:08.500 + +Monty Python's Flying Circus tonight comes to you live from the Grillomat Snack Bar, Paignton. + +00:00:08.500 --> 00:00:13.000 +[action] Interior of a nasty snack bar; Linkman at plastic table. + +00:00:13.000 --> 00:00:21.000 + +Hello to you live from the Grillomat Snack Bar, Paignton. And so, without any more ado, let's have the titles. + +00:00:21.000 --> 00:00:22.500 + +It's… + +00:00:22.500 --> 00:00:28.000 +[action] Animated titles; cut back to snack bar. + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:46.000 +[action] Linkman, forced bonhomie: introduces the 'menu' and promises anything could happen; calls for 'the item'. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_18_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/2_Blackmail.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_18_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/2_Blackmail.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..c7c09553 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_18_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/2_Blackmail.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,80 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Game-show style blackmail sketch starting at anchor #2. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:05.000 +[action] Lights reveal giant 'Blackmail' sign flashing; showbiz set; glittery desk with telephone. + +00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:11.000 + +Hello, good evening, and welcome to 'Blackmail'! And to start tonight's programme, we go to Preston in Lancashire, and Mrs Betty Teal! + +00:00:11.000 --> 00:00:14.000 +[action] B/W photo of housewife with face obscured. + +00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:16.500 + +Hello, Mrs Teal! + +00:00:16.500 --> 00:00:22.000 +[action] Presenter picks up letter and reads. + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:27.000 + +Now this is for £15 and it's to stop us revealing the name of your lover in Bolton. + +00:00:27.000 --> 00:00:29.000 +[caption] £15 (flashing) + +00:00:29.000 --> 00:00:38.000 + +So Mrs Teal…if you send us £15 by return post, please, and your husband Trevor, and your lovely children, Diane, Janice and Juliet need never know the name of your lover in Bolton. + +00:00:38.000 --> 00:00:42.000 +[action] Nude organist plays stirring chords. + +00:00:42.000 --> 00:00:56.000 +[action] Presenter displays letter, hotel book, and photos while speaking of Mr S. of Bromsgrove, freemason and prospective Tory MP… £3,000… + +00:00:56.000 --> 00:00:58.000 +[caption] £3000 (flashing) + +00:00:58.000 --> 00:01:06.000 + +…to stop us from revealing your name, the name of the three other people involved, the youth organization to which they belong, and the shop where you bought the equipment. + +00:01:06.000 --> 00:01:12.000 +[action] Organ chords; still of two pairs of naked feet; back to presenter. + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:20.000 + +We'll be showing you more of that photograph later in the programme…unless we hear from Charles or Michael. And now it's time for our 'Stop the Film' spot! + +00:01:20.000 --> 00:01:22.000 +[caption] STOP THE FILM (flashing) + +00:01:22.000 --> 00:01:38.000 + +The rules are very simple… the victim may phone me at any point and stop the film… the money increases as the film goes on… with the clock at £300 this week 'Stop the Film' visited Thames Ditton… + +00:01:38.000 --> 00:02:10.000 +[action] Murky 8mm film: street in Thames Ditton; furtive man in Robin Hood hat; house entry; lingerie; window voyeur shots; increasing £ meter. + +00:02:10.000 --> 00:02:12.000 + +He's being very brave here… + +00:02:12.000 --> 00:02:32.000 +[action] Woman undressing; corsets; produces whip; beckons; phone rings in studio; presenter answers. + +00:02:32.000 --> 00:02:42.000 + +Hello, sir, hello, yes. No sir, no, I'm sure you didn't. No, it's all right, sir, we don't morally censure, we just want the money….Yes, and here's the address to send it to: + +00:02:42.000 --> 00:02:48.000 +[caption] BLACKMAIL / BEHIND THE HOT WATER PIPES / THIRD WASHROOM ALONG / VICTORIA STATION + +00:02:48.000 --> 00:02:52.000 + +Not at all, sir…thank you. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_18_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/3_Society_for_Putting_Things_on_top_of_Other_Things.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_18_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/3_Society_for_Putting_Things_on_top_of_Other_Things.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..57cded7a --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_18_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/3_Society_for_Putting_Things_on_top_of_Other_Things.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,111 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Banquet speech, crisis, film trap, POW pastiche, and escape into animation. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Middle-aged man furtively replaces phone; rejoins banquet in progress. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:09.000 + +Sorry chaps, it was my mother. + +00:00:09.000 --> 00:00:14.000 + +Gentlemen, pray silence for the President of the Royal Society for Putting Things on Top of Other Things. + +00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:50.000 +[dialogue] Annual report: many things put on other things; warning against complacency; praise for Australasian branch; rebuke to Staffordshire; call for explanation. + +00:00:50.000 --> 00:00:56.000 + +Er, Cutler, Staffordshire. Um… well, Mr Chairman, it's just that most of the members in Staffordshire feel… the whole thing's a bit silly. + +00:00:56.000 --> 00:01:06.000 + +Silly! SILLY!! … Silly! I suppose it is, a bit… Right, okay, meeting adjourned for ever. + +00:01:06.000 --> 00:01:14.000 +[action] Sir William exits to exterior, realizes he's on film, retreats; tries second door—also film; room is surrounded by film. + +00:01:14.000 --> 00:01:18.000 + +Gentlemen! I have bad news. This room is surrounded by film. + +00:01:18.000 --> 00:01:26.000 +[action] Members panic; try doors/windows; cut between studio and film; return to center. + +00:01:26.000 --> 00:01:28.000 + +We're trapped! + +00:01:28.000 --> 00:01:32.000 + +Don't panic, we'll get out of this. + +00:01:32.000 --> 00:01:34.000 + +How? + +00:01:34.000 --> 00:01:36.000 + +We'll tunnel our way out. + +00:01:36.000 --> 00:01:40.000 + +Good thinking, sir. I'll get the horse. + +00:01:40.000 --> 00:01:48.000 + +Okay Captain, detail three men… two hours digging, two hours vaulting, two hours sleeping, okay? + +00:01:48.000 --> 00:01:58.000 +[action] Vaulting horse carried in; members vault; Gestapo officers pass, comment on English prisoners doing sport and missing Cockney sergeant. + +00:01:58.000 --> 00:02:02.000 + +All right, Medwin, let's see you get over that horse. Pick your feet up, Medwin. Come on, boy! + +00:02:02.000 --> 00:02:06.000 + +Ze stupid English. Zey are prisoners and all they do is the sport. + +00:02:06.000 --> 00:02:08.000 + +One thing worries me, Fritz. + +00:02:08.000 --> 00:02:09.500 + +Ja? + +00:02:09.500 --> 00:02:13.000 + +Where's the traditional cheeky and lovable Cockney sergeant? + +00:02:13.000 --> 00:02:18.000 +[action] Sergeant dons tin helmet, sings 'Maybe it's because I'm a Londoner…' + +00:02:18.000 --> 00:02:20.000 + +Good. Everything seems to be in order. + +00:02:20.000 --> 00:02:24.000 + +Colonel! I've just found another exit, sir. + +00:02:24.000 --> 00:02:27.000 + +Okay, quickly, run this way. + +00:02:27.000 --> 00:02:32.000 +[dialogue] Everyone: If we could run that way… sorry. + +00:02:32.000 --> 00:02:44.000 +[action] Animation: hopping Victorian-foot; members run across cartoon; fall into nothingness; descend oesophagus into stomach with vegetables; Edwardian gent belches. + +00:02:44.000 --> 00:02:46.500 + +Oh, I'm terribly sorry, excuse me. + +00:02:46.500 --> 00:02:52.000 +[action] Door marked 'gents'; flush; cut to café linkman at table. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_18_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/4_Escape_(from_film).vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_18_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/4_Escape_(from_film).vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..47be563d --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_18_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/4_Escape_(from_film).vtt @@ -0,0 +1,8 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Continuation beat where society attempts POW-style escape; included at end of Society skit leading into link. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:05.000 + +Ah, hello. Well they certainly seem to be in a tight spot, and I spot… our next item… + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_18_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/5_Current_affairs.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_18_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/5_Current_affairs.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..e223b748 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_18_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/5_Current_affairs.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,73 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Mr Praline and Brooky attempt a chat show; floor manager cuts them. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:05.500 +[action] Simple set with two chairs; close on Mr Praline. + +00:00:05.500 --> 00:00:18.000 + +Hello. 'Ow are you? I'm fine. Welcome to a new half-hour chat show in which me… and Brooky… discuss current affairs issues of burning import. + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:22.000 + +Have you heard the one about the three nuns in the nudist colony? + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:25.000 + +Shut up. Tonight, the population explosion. + +00:00:25.000 --> 00:00:29.000 + +Apparently there were these three nuns… + +00:00:29.000 --> 00:00:37.000 + +Shut up. Come the year 1991… the Chinese will be three deep. Another thing… + +00:00:37.000 --> 00:00:40.000 +[action] Floor manager enters. + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:45.000 + +Sorry, loves, sorry, the show is too long this week and this scene's been cut. + +00:00:45.000 --> 00:00:48.000 + +Lord Hill's at the bottom of this. + +00:00:48.000 --> 00:00:54.000 + +But if you can find a piano stool you can appear later on in the show on film. + +00:00:54.000 --> 00:00:56.500 + +'Ow much? + +00:00:56.500 --> 00:01:00.000 + +Oh, about ten bob each? + +00:01:00.000 --> 00:01:02.500 + +I wouldn't wipe me nose on it. + +00:01:02.500 --> 00:01:05.000 + +'Ave you 'eard the one about these three nuns… + +00:01:05.000 --> 00:01:12.000 + +Shh. I can hear something. 'Ang about, we may still get in this show as a link. + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:18.000 +[action] Praline kneels; beneath floor an animation shows society members flushing along a pipe. + +00:01:18.000 --> 00:01:21.000 + +That's clever. How do they do that? + +00:01:21.000 --> 00:01:24.000 + +Colour separation, you cotton head. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_18_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/6_Accidents_sketch.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_18_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/6_Accidents_sketch.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..a2c67677 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_18_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/6_Accidents_sketch.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,118 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Prawn Salad Ltd: a cascade of mishaps leading to house explosion. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:08.000 +[action] Door marked 'Prawn Salad Ltd'; Butler shows Man into stately living room. + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:12.000 + +Well, if you'll just wait in here, sir, I'm sure Mr Thompson won't keep you waiting long. + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:14.500 + +Fine. Thanks very much. + +00:00:14.500 --> 00:00:18.000 +[action] Mirror suddenly falls and smashes. + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:21.000 + +The mirror fell off the wall. + +00:00:21.000 --> 00:00:22.500 + +Sir? + +00:00:22.500 --> 00:00:26.000 + +The mirror fell off… off the wall… it fell. + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:30.000 + +I see. You'd better wait here. I'll get a cloth. + +00:00:30.000 --> 00:00:36.000 +[action] Bookcase and drinks trolley crash down as Butler leaves; he returns. + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:40.000 + +It… it came off the wall. + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:43.000 + +Really, sir. + +00:00:43.000 --> 00:00:48.000 + +Yes, I… I didn't touch it. + +00:00:48.000 --> 00:00:52.000 + +Of course not. It just fell off the wall. + +00:00:52.000 --> 00:00:54.000 + +Don't move. I'll get help. + +00:00:54.000 --> 00:01:00.000 +[action] Maid enters; hands him a dagger; trips and falls lethally onto it. + +00:01:00.000 --> 00:01:03.000 + +Er, she just fell on… on to the dagger. + +00:01:03.000 --> 00:01:06.500 + +Yes, of course she did, sir. + +00:01:06.500 --> 00:01:12.000 +[action] Green humors him, backs away, then falls backwards through window. + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:14.500 + +I'm terribly sorry. + +00:01:14.500 --> 00:01:20.000 +[action] Policeman and Butler enter. + +00:01:20.000 --> 00:01:21.500 + +That's him. + +00:01:21.500 --> 00:01:23.500 + +Right, sir. + +00:01:23.500 --> 00:01:29.000 + +Hello, officer. There seems to have been an accident. Well, several accidents actually. + +00:01:29.000 --> 00:01:34.000 + +That's right, sir. Would you come this way, please… Ahh! It's me… me heart, sir. + +00:01:34.000 --> 00:01:36.500 + +You swine. I'll get you for that. + +00:01:36.500 --> 00:01:40.000 +[action] Ceiling collapses on Butler. + +00:01:40.000 --> 00:01:42.500 + +Er, I won't wait. I'll phone. + +00:01:42.500 --> 00:01:56.000 +[action] Hallway gauntlet: suits of armour, bookcase glass, clock, pictures crash as he passes; he exits the main door—cut to stock shot of country house explosion; returns, holding door remains. + +00:01:56.000 --> 00:01:57.500 + +Sorry. + +00:01:57.500 --> 00:02:04.000 +[action] Society members in evening dress stroll by through rubble, chatting. + +00:02:04.000 --> 00:02:12.000 +[action] They pass a singing Bishop in a field; brief exchange about next week's show; move on toward school hall. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_18_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/7_Seven_Brides_for_Seven_Brothers.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_18_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/7_Seven_Brides_for_Seven_Brothers.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..aa2d3ef4 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_18_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/7_Seven_Brides_for_Seven_Brothers.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,95 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE School play parody by Dibley School for Boys. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] School hall stage; Praline plays piano badly; Brooky turns pages. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:08.500 + +'Seven Brides for Seven Brothers'. + +00:00:08.500 --> 00:00:11.000 +[action] Headmaster enters in mortar board. + +00:00:11.000 --> 00:00:15.000 + +'Tis time the seven Smith brothers had brides. Fetch me Smith Major. + +00:00:15.000 --> 00:00:16.500 + +Sir. + +00:00:16.500 --> 00:00:20.000 + +'Tis time you and your six brothers were married. + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:22.500 + +Thank you, Headmaster. + +00:00:22.500 --> 00:00:26.000 + +Fetch me your six brothers, that the seven brothers may be together. + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:30.000 +[action] Handbell rings; three boys enter and stand. + +00:00:30.000 --> 00:00:32.000 + +Behold, the seven brothers. + +00:00:32.000 --> 00:00:37.000 + +Right, I'll see Watson, Wilkins, and Spratt in my study afterwards. + +00:00:37.000 --> 00:00:44.000 + +But where shall we find seven brides for seven brothers? + +00:00:44.000 --> 00:00:46.500 + +The Sabine School for Girls. + +00:00:46.500 --> 00:00:49.000 + +Yes, and it's the Annual Dance. + +00:00:49.000 --> 00:00:52.000 + +Fetch hither the seven brides for seven brothers. + +00:00:52.000 --> 00:00:55.000 +[action] Two schoolgirls enter. + +00:00:55.000 --> 00:00:57.000 + +Behold the seven brides. + +00:00:57.000 --> 00:01:03.000 + +Fetch hither the padre that the seven brides may marry the seven brothers… Fetch hither the master on duty… + +00:01:03.000 --> 00:01:06.500 + +Sorry, I'm late, Headmaster - I've been wrestling with Plato. + +00:01:06.500 --> 00:01:10.000 + +What you do in your own time, Padre, is written on the wall in the vestry. + +00:01:10.000 --> 00:01:14.000 + +Right, do you four boys take these two girls to be your seven brides? + +00:01:14.000 --> 00:01:15.500 + +Yes, sir. + +00:01:15.500 --> 00:01:18.000 + +Right, go and do your prep. + +00:01:18.000 --> 00:01:20.000 +[action] Curtain comes across quickly. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_18_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/8_The_man_who_is_alternately_rude_and_polite.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_18_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/8_The_man_who_is_alternately_rude_and_polite.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..46c7245c --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_18_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/8_The_man_who_is_alternately_rude_and_polite.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,95 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Butcher alternates insults and politeness with posh gent. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 +[action] Animation link to butcher's shop; city gent enters. + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:08.000 + +Good morning, I'd care to purchase a chicken, please. + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:12.000 + +Don't come here with that posh talk you nasty, stuck-up twit. + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:14.000 + +I beg your pardon? + +00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:16.500 + +A chicken, sir. Certainly. + +00:00:16.500 --> 00:00:20.000 + +Thank you. And how much does that work out to per pound, my good fellow? + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:23.500 + +Per pound, you slimy trollop, what kind of a ponce are you? + +00:00:23.500 --> 00:00:25.500 + +I'm sorry? + +00:00:25.500 --> 00:00:28.000 + +4/6 a pound, sir, nice and ready for roasting. + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:31.500 + +I see, and I'd care to purchase some stuffing in addition, please. + +00:00:31.500 --> 00:00:34.500 + +Use your own, you great poofy poonagger! + +00:00:34.500 --> 00:00:36.000 + +What? + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:38.500 + +Ah, certainly sir, some stuffing. + +00:00:38.500 --> 00:00:40.000 + +Oh, thank you. + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:44.000 + +'Oh, thank you' says the great queen like a la-di-dah poofta. + +00:00:44.000 --> 00:00:46.000 + +I beg your pardon? + +00:00:46.000 --> 00:00:48.000 + +That's all right, sir, call again. + +00:00:48.000 --> 00:00:50.000 + +Excuse me. + +00:00:50.000 --> 00:00:53.000 + +What is it now, you great pillock? + +00:00:53.000 --> 00:00:58.000 + +Well, I can't help noticing that you insult me and then you're polite to me alternately. + +00:00:58.000 --> 00:01:01.000 + +I'm terribly sorry to hear that, sir. + +00:01:01.000 --> 00:01:04.000 + +That's all right. It doesn't really matter. + +00:01:04.000 --> 00:01:07.000 + +Tough titty if it did, you nasty spotted prancer. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_18_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/9_Documentary_on_boxer.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_18_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/9_Documentary_on_boxer.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..a31d56f3 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_18_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/9_Documentary_on_boxer.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,137 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Ken Clean-Air Systems mock documentary; training, interviews, and fight. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Ken jogs along country road; heavy breathing and footfalls. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:14.000 + +This is Ken Clean-Air Systems, the great white hope of the British boxing world… ready to face the giant American, Satellite Five. + +00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:18.000 +[caption] MR ENGLEBERT HUMPERDINCK - MANAGER + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:22.000 + +The great thing about Ken is that he's almost totally stupid. + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:29.000 + +Every morning, he jogs the forty-seven miles from his two-bedroomed, eight-bathroom, six-up-two-down, three-to-go-house in Reigate, to the Government's Pesticide Research Centre at Shoreham. Nobody knows why. + +00:00:29.000 --> 00:00:32.000 +[caption] MRS CLEAN-AIR SYSTEMS + +00:00:32.000 --> 00:00:40.000 + +Basically Ken is a very gentle, home-loving person… rubbing it with germoline and banging its head on the table. + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:43.000 +[caption] MRS NELLIE AIR-VENT, MOTHER + +00:00:43.000 --> 00:00:54.000 + +Oh he was such a pretty baby… pulverize their opponent into a bloody mass… one man's hell and Ken's glory. + +00:00:54.000 --> 00:01:00.000 + +Every morning at his little three-room semi near Reading, Ken gets up at three o'clock… and goes back to bed again because it's far too early. + +00:01:00.000 --> 00:01:08.000 + +At seven o'clock Ken gets up… goes back to bed again. At 7.50 every morning Ken's trainer runs the 13,000 miles… and gets him up. + +00:01:08.000 --> 00:01:15.000 + +I used to wake Ken up with a crowbar on the back of the head… I now wake him up with a steel peg driven into his skull with a mallet. + +00:01:15.000 --> 00:01:21.000 + +For breakfast every day, Ken places a plate of liver and bacon under his chair, and locks himself in the cupboard. + +00:01:21.000 --> 00:01:26.000 + +Well, he's having a lot of mental difficulties with his breakfasts… once we've removed [the particle of brain] he'll be perfectly all right. + +00:01:26.000 --> 00:01:38.000 + +At 8.30 the real training begins… Ken goes back to bed and his trainer gets him up… At 10.30 every morning Ken arrives at what he thinks is the gym… Today it's a hospital. + +00:01:38.000 --> 00:01:42.000 + +Urn, straight down there. Straight down there. + +00:01:42.000 --> 00:01:52.000 + +For lunch Ken crouches down in the road and rubs gravel into his hair… Ken's soon up on his feet and back to bed… + +00:01:52.000 --> 00:01:55.000 + +Hello. When Ken is in a really deep sleep like this one, the only way to wake him up is to saw his head off. + +00:01:55.000 --> 00:02:02.000 +[action] Punchbag pummelled; impact bangs continue. + +00:02:02.000 --> 00:02:10.000 + +What is he like in the ring… We asked his sparring partner and one-time childhood sweetheart, Maureen Spencer. + +00:02:10.000 --> 00:02:16.000 + +Well, I think that if Ken keeps his right up… he should go for a cut eye in the third and put Wilcox on the canvas by six. + +00:02:16.000 --> 00:02:28.000 + +Ken's opponent in Tuesday's fight is Petula Wilcox… She's keen on knitting and likes Cliff Richard records. How does she rate her chances against Ken? + +00:02:28.000 --> 00:02:32.000 + +Well, I'm a southpaw and I think this will confuse him, particularly with his brain problem. + +00:02:32.000 --> 00:02:38.000 + +My lords, ladies and gedderbong… On my right… Mr Ken Clean-Air Systems!… and on my left! Miss Petula Wilcox. + +00:02:38.000 --> 00:02:40.000 +[caption] ROUND 1 + +00:02:40.000 --> 00:02:58.000 +[action] Bell rings; Ken savages Petula at comical speed; crowd roars. + +00:02:58.000 --> 00:03:02.000 + +I think boxing's a splendid sport - teaches you self-defense. + +00:03:02.000 --> 00:03:08.000 + +Obviously boxing must have its limits, but providing they're both perfectly fit I can see nothing wrong with one healthy man beating the living daylights out of a little schoolgirl. + +00:03:08.000 --> 00:03:10.000 + +It's quick and it's fun. + +00:03:10.000 --> 00:03:16.000 +[action] Cut to Grillomat closing; waitress cleans; retrieves note. + +00:03:16.000 --> 00:03:20.000 + +Oh, no, he's gone. But he left a message. Jack! Where's that note that fellow left? + +00:03:20.000 --> 00:03:22.000 + +Oh, here you are. + +00:03:22.000 --> 00:03:26.000 + +It says sorry, had to catch the last bus. Am on the 49b to Babbacombe. + +00:03:26.000 --> 00:03:30.000 +[action] Top of open-top bus driving along. + +00:03:30.000 --> 00:03:58.000 +[dialogue] Linkman on bus delivers closing monologue, self-doubt, and wishes it would say 'The End'. + +00:03:58.000 --> 00:04:00.000 +[caption] The End + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_19_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/0_Episode19_head_tail.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_19_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/0_Episode19_head_tail.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..b2dbeea0 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_19_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/0_Episode19_head_tail.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,48 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated placeholder timings. Includes intro links list, announcer interruption, animation/title, and end credits for Timmy Williams sequence. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:05.000 +[caption] Episode Nineteen + +00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:20.000 +[caption] Colour code: John Cleese - Michael Palin - Eric Idle - Graham Chapman - Terry Jones - Terry Gilliam - Carol Cleveland + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:35.000 +[action] Animated BBC world symbol appears. + +00:00:35.000 --> 00:00:50.000 + +You probably noticed that I didn't say 'and now for something completely different' just now. This is simply because I am unable to appear in the show this week. [action] looks closely at script, puzzled. Sorry to interrupt you. + +00:00:50.000 --> 00:01:00.000 +[action] Cut to a man holding his mouth open to show the camera his teeth. + +00:01:00.000 --> 00:01:08.000 + +I'm terribly sorry to interrupt but my tooth's hurting, just around here. + +00:01:08.000 --> 00:01:12.000 + +Get off. + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:16.000 + +Oh, sorry. + +00:01:16.000 --> 00:01:22.000 +[action] Cut to pompous moustached stockbroker type. + +00:01:22.000 --> 00:01:40.000 + +I'm not sorry to interrupt - I'll interrupt anything if it gets people looking in my direction - like at my old school where, by a coincidence, the annual prize giving is going on at this very moment. + +00:12:00.000 --> 00:12:08.000 +[caption] Timmy Williams' 'Coffee Time' was brought to you live from Woppi's in Holborn. + +00:12:08.000 --> 00:13:30.000 +[caption] THEME SCRIPT BY TIMMY WILLIAMS. ENTIRELY WRITTEN BY TIMMY WILLIAMS. ADDITIONAL MATERIAL BY: PETER WRAY, LEN ASHLEY, GEOFFREY INGERSOLL, GEORGE HERBERT, HARRY LOWALL, RALPH EMERSON, HATTY STARR, FRANK PICKSLEY, JOHN STAMFORD, SHELLEY BUNHEUR, MALCOLM KERR, JAMES BEACH, ALAN BAILEY, BRIAN FELDMAN, STIRLING HARTLEY, ADRIAN BEAMISH, GUY WARING, MARK TOMKINS, SIDNEY SMITH, RICHARD HOVEY, EDMUND GOSSE, JONATHAN ASHMORE, BILL WRIGHT, ARTHUR FULLER, RICHARD SAVAGE, MICHAEL WHITEMORE, BUDGE RYAN, CEDRIC HAZLETT, TERRY JONES, MICHAEL PALIN, JOHN GAYNOR, GEORGE COLEMAN, SAMUEL SPURGEON, THOMAS MASSINGER, STEPHEN DAVIS, WALTER CHAPMAN, REGINALD MARWOOD, DAVID GOSCHEN, PETER SCHULMAN, DENNIS FRANKEL, DAVID ROBINSON, PAUL RAYMOND, JOHN WILLDER, JOHNNY LYNN, JOE SHAW, SIMON SMITH, MONTY PYTHON, MICHAEL LAPIN, SYDNEY LOTTERBY, IAN MATHERSON, HUMPHREY BARCLAY, BURT ANCASTER, KIRK OUGLAS, KEN SMITH, GEOFFREY HUGHES, BRIAN FITZJONES, MICHAEL GOWERS, JOHN PENNYCATE, PETER BAKER, NEIL SHAND. + +00:13:30.000 --> 00:13:36.000 +[caption] SUPERIMPOSED FLASHING CAPTION: 'NO CHANGE' + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_19_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/10_Timmy_Williams_interview.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_19_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/10_Timmy_Williams_interview.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..2231be72 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_19_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/10_Timmy_Williams_interview.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,221 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated placeholder timings. Skit starts at anchor #10. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:10.000 +[action] Animation leads to a booth in an expensive Italian-style coffee shop. Nigel sits. Timmy Williams enters, faintly resembling David Frost. + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:18.000 + +Nigel! Wonderful to see you, super, super, super. Am I a teeny bit late? + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:22.000 + +A bit, an hour. + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:32.000 + +Oh, super! Only Snowdon's been re-touching my profile and we can't upset the lovely Snowdon, can we? + +00:00:32.000 --> 00:00:36.000 + +Gosh, no. + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:46.000 +[action] A man passes. + +00:00:46.000 --> 00:01:06.000 + +[action] gets up and clasps hands. … David Bloggs … the one and only … super to see you. Who are you working for? Come and work for me, I'll call you tomorrow. [action] sits down. It's really lovely to have this little chat with you. + +00:01:06.000 --> 00:01:12.000 + +Well, I… + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:22.000 + +It is so nice to have this little talk about things. I heard a teeny rumourlette that you were married. + +00:01:22.000 --> 00:01:30.000 + +Well, not quite, no. My wife's just died, actually. + +00:01:30.000 --> 00:01:44.000 + +Oh dear. [action] sees another man passing. Brian! [action] extends arm. We must get together again soon. See you. Bye. [to Nigel] Well, perhaps we could do a tribute to her on the show. + +00:01:44.000 --> 00:01:50.000 + +Well, no. I… + +00:01:50.000 --> 00:02:00.000 + +I'll get Peter, William, Arthur, Alex, Joan, Ted, Scott, Will, John and Ray to fix it up. It is so nice having this little chat. + +00:02:00.000 --> 00:02:08.000 + +Well, actually Timmy, I'm glad to get you on your own… + +00:02:08.000 --> 00:02:16.000 +[action] A reporter approaches the table. + +00:02:16.000 --> 00:02:24.000 + +You don't mind if Peter just sits in, do you? + +00:02:24.000 --> 00:02:30.000 + +Well, actually… + +00:02:30.000 --> 00:02:44.000 + +Only he's doing an article on me for the 'Mail'. He's such a lovely person. + +00:02:44.000 --> 00:02:48.000 + +Hello. + +00:02:48.000 --> 00:03:06.000 + +Peter, this is one of the nicest people in the world, Nigel Watt. [action] Peter scribbles. W-A-double T. That's right, yes. + +00:03:06.000 --> 00:03:14.000 + +Well, actually, Timmy, the thing is, it's a bit private. + +00:03:14.000 --> 00:03:22.000 +[action] A writer comes to the table. + +00:03:22.000 --> 00:03:34.000 + +Oh, you don't mind if Peter just sits in, do you? Only Peter's writing a book on me. Peter, you know Tony from the 'Mail', don't you? + +00:03:34.000 --> 00:03:38.000 + +Yes, we met in the Turkish bath yesterday. + +00:03:38.000 --> 00:03:44.000 + +Super, super. Did it come up well in the writing yesterday? + +00:03:44.000 --> 00:03:48.000 + +Great, great, great. + +00:03:48.000 --> 00:03:56.000 + +You took out the tummy references? [action] makes fatness signs. + +00:03:56.000 --> 00:04:00.000 + +Yes, I did. + +00:04:00.000 --> 00:04:14.000 + +Super, super, super. Just to fill you in, this is Nigel Watt and we are having a little heart-to-heart. H-E-A-R-T. Smashing. Do go on, Nigel. + +00:04:14.000 --> 00:04:20.000 +[action] They both start writing. + +00:04:20.000 --> 00:04:28.000 + +Well, well, the thing is, Timmy, um er… + +00:04:28.000 --> 00:04:38.000 +[action] Timmy smiles and poses. Nigel stops. A photographer hovers. + +00:04:38.000 --> 00:05:06.000 + +Do carry on, it's the 'TV Times', only they syndicate these photographs to America. Would you mind if we just er… [action] grabs Nigel by the hand and poses hearty friendship photo. Super, super. One over here, I think, Bob. A little smile, please, smashing, smashing. Feel free, Bob, to circulate, won't you. Do go on, this is most interesting. + +00:05:06.000 --> 00:05:14.000 + +Well, the thing is, Timmy, I'm a bit embarrassed. + +00:05:14.000 --> 00:05:24.000 +[action] Waiter approaches the table. + +00:05:24.000 --> 00:05:36.000 + +Oh, Mr Willimas, it's so nice to see you. Will you sign this for my little daughter, please? + +00:05:36.000 --> 00:05:48.000 + +Hello, Mario. Super, wonderful. [action] signs. Just two lovely coffees, please. + +00:05:48.000 --> 00:05:56.000 +[action] Director comes in. + +00:05:56.000 --> 00:06:10.000 + +Sorry, sorry, Timmy. Can we just go from where Mario comes in, we're getting bad sound, OK? + +00:06:10.000 --> 00:06:22.000 + +It's German television. Isn't it exciting, Nigel? They're doing a prize-winning documentary on me. + +00:06:22.000 --> 00:06:30.000 +[action] We see a film camera and the whole crew gathered. + +00:06:30.000 --> 00:06:36.000 + +'The Wonderful Mr Williams', scene 239, take 2. + +00:06:36.000 --> 00:06:40.000 + +Action! + +00:06:40.000 --> 00:07:02.000 + +[action] taking the cue, Timmy switches persona. Mario, how super to see you. How are the lovely family? Please give your little daughter this. [action] hands him a five pound note. Thank you. And just two lovely coffees, please. + +00:07:02.000 --> 00:07:06.000 + +Yes, sir. + +00:07:06.000 --> 00:07:16.000 + +[aside] Such a lovely waiter. Now, go on please, this is most interesting. + +00:07:16.000 --> 00:07:44.000 + +Well … er… as I was saying, Timmy, my wife's gone… gone. [action] close-up on Nigel. I've got three children and I'm at my wits end. No job, no insurance, no money at all. I'm absolutely flat broke, I just don't know where to turn. I… I'm absolutely at the end of my tether. You're my only chance. Can you help me, please, Timmy? + +00:07:44.000 --> 00:07:52.000 +[action] He looks up; Timmy isn't there. Timmy bounds back. + +00:07:52.000 --> 00:08:16.000 + +Sorry, I was on the phone to America. It's been super having this lovely little chat. We must do this again more often. Er… will you get the coffees? I'm afraid I must dash, I'm an hour late for the Israeli Embassy. [action] there is a shot; Nigel slumps over the table, gun in his hand. Er… did you get that shot all right, sound? + +00:08:16.000 --> 00:08:20.000 + +Yes, fine. + +00:08:20.000 --> 00:08:30.000 + +It… it wasn't a bit too wicked, was it? I mean, it wasn't too cruel? + +00:08:30.000 --> 00:08:36.000 + +No, no, no. It was great. + +00:08:36.000 --> 00:08:44.000 + +No, super… well, er… I think it shows I'm human, don't you? + +00:08:44.000 --> 00:08:50.000 + +Yes, great. + +00:08:50.000 --> 00:09:06.000 + +Super, super. Well, the charabanc's here. Go on, everybody. Bye. [action] he waves. + +00:09:06.000 --> 00:09:22.000 +[action] They all troop off after him. Theme music starts. Pull back to see camera set-up. Credits roll. + +00:09:22.000 --> 00:09:32.000 + +Timmy Williams' 'Coffee Time' was brought to you live from Woppi's in Holborn. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_19_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/11_Raymond_Luxury_Yacht_interview.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_19_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/11_Raymond_Luxury_Yacht_interview.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..2324746f --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_19_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/11_Raymond_Luxury_Yacht_interview.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,51 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated placeholder timings. Skit starts at anchor #11. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:10.000 +[action] Fade out. Fade in on ordinary interview set. Interviewer sits with man with large semitic polystyrene nose. + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:18.000 + +Good evening. I have with me in the studio tonight one of the country's leading skin specialists - Raymond Luxury Yacht. + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:22.000 + +That's not my name. + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:28.000 + +I'm sorry - Raymond Luxury Yach-t. + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:40.000 + +No, no, no - it's spelt Raymond Luxury Yach-t, but it's pronounced 'Throatwobbler Mangrove'. + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:46.000 + +You're a very silly man and I'm not going to interview you. + +00:00:46.000 --> 00:00:50.000 + +Ah, anti-semitism! + +00:00:50.000 --> 00:00:58.000 + +Not at all. It's not even a proper nose. [action] takes it off. It's polystyrene. + +00:00:58.000 --> 00:01:02.000 + +Give me my nose back. + +00:01:02.000 --> 00:01:06.000 + +You can collect it at reception. Now go away. + +00:01:06.000 --> 00:01:10.000 + +I want to be on the television. + +00:01:10.000 --> 00:01:14.000 + +Well you can't. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_19_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/12_Registry_office.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_19_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/12_Registry_office.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..d77b2b7c --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_19_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/12_Registry_office.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,158 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated placeholder timings. Skit starts at anchor #12. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:08.000 +[action] Animation sketch. Cut to large sign 'Registry Office', 'Marriages'. A man talks to the registrar. + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:12.000 + +Er, excuse me, I want to get married. + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:16.000 + +I'm afraid I'm already married, sir. + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:20.000 + +Er, no, no. I just want to get married. + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:26.000 + +I could get a divorce, I suppose, but it'll be a bit of a wrench. + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:32.000 + +Er, no, no. That wouldn't be necessary because… + +00:00:32.000 --> 00:00:42.000 + +You see, would you come to my place or should I have to come to yours, because I've just got a big mortgage. + +00:00:42.000 --> 00:00:48.000 + +No, no, I want to get married here. + +00:00:48.000 --> 00:00:54.000 + +Oh dear. I had my heart set on a church wedding. + +00:00:54.000 --> 00:01:02.000 + +Look, I just want you to marry me… to… + +00:01:02.000 --> 00:01:10.000 + +I want to marry you too sir, but it's not as simple as that. You sure you want to get married? + +00:01:10.000 --> 00:01:16.000 + +Yes. I want to get married very quickly. + +00:01:16.000 --> 00:01:20.000 + +Suits me, sir. Suits me. + +00:01:20.000 --> 00:01:26.000 + +I don't want to marry you! + +00:01:26.000 --> 00:01:32.000 + +There is such a thing as breach of promise, sir. + +00:01:32.000 --> 00:01:40.000 + +Look, I just want you to act as registrar and marry me. + +00:01:40.000 --> 00:01:48.000 + +I will marry you sir, but please make up your mind. Please don't trifle with my affections. + +00:01:48.000 --> 00:01:52.000 + +I'm sorry, but… + +00:01:52.000 --> 00:02:04.000 + +That's all right, sir. I forgive you. Lovers' tiff. But you're not the first person to ask me today. I've turned down several people already. + +00:02:04.000 --> 00:02:10.000 + +Look, I'm already engaged. + +00:02:10.000 --> 00:02:18.000 + +[aside] agreeing and thinking. Yes, and I'm already married. Still we'll get round it. + +00:02:18.000 --> 00:02:24.000 +[action] Second Man enters. + +00:02:24.000 --> 00:02:30.000 + +Good morning. I want to get married. + +00:02:30.000 --> 00:02:36.000 + +I'm afraid I'm already marrying this gentleman, sir. + +00:02:36.000 --> 00:02:42.000 + +Well, can I get married after him? + +00:02:42.000 --> 00:02:50.000 + +Well, divorce isn't as quick as that, sir. Still, if you're keen. + +00:02:50.000 --> 00:02:56.000 +[action] Third Man enters. + +00:02:56.000 --> 00:03:02.000 + +I want to get married, please. + +00:03:02.000 --> 00:03:10.000 + +Heavens, it's my lucky day, isn't it. All right, but you'll have to wait until I've married these two, sir. + +00:03:10.000 --> 00:03:20.000 + +What, those two getting married… Nigel What are you doing marrying him? + +00:03:20.000 --> 00:03:26.000 + +He's marrying me first, sir. + +00:03:26.000 --> 00:03:34.000 + +He's engaged to me. + +00:03:34.000 --> 00:03:40.000 +[action] Fourth Man (big and butch) enters. + +00:03:40.000 --> 00:03:44.000 + +Come on, Henry. + +00:03:44.000 --> 00:03:48.000 + +Blimey, the wife. + +00:03:48.000 --> 00:03:54.000 + +Will you marry me? + +00:03:54.000 --> 00:04:00.000 + +I'm already married. + +00:04:00.000 --> 00:04:10.000 +[action] Cut to a photo of all five standing happily outside a house. + +00:04:10.000 --> 00:04:24.000 + +Well, things turned out all right in the end, but you musn't ask how 'cos it's naughty. They're all married and living quite well in a council estate near Dulwich. + +00:04:24.000 --> 00:04:30.000 +[caption] ANIMATION: 'The Spot' + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_19_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/13_Election_Night_Special_(Silly_and_Sensible_Parties).vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_19_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/13_Election_Night_Special_(Silly_and_Sensible_Parties).vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..f921d713 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_19_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/13_Election_Night_Special_(Silly_and_Sensible_Parties).vtt @@ -0,0 +1,264 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated placeholder timings. Skit starts at anchor #13. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[caption] 'ELECTION NIGHT SPECIAL' + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:14.000 +[action] Linkman sitting at desk. + +00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:40.000 + +[very excited] Hello and welcome to 'Election Night Special'. There's great excitement here as we should be getting the first results through any minute now. We don't know where it'll be from…it might be Leicester or from Luton. The polling's been quite heavy in both areas… oh, wait a moment…I'm just getting…I'm just getting a loud buzzing noise in my left ear. Excuse me a moment. [action] he bangs ear and knocks a large bee out. Uuggh! [crowd cheering] Anyway, let's go straight over to James Gilbert at Leicester. + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:52.000 +[action] Returning officer stands before mixed group: half grey-suited, half silly-dressed candidates. + +00:00:52.000 --> 00:01:06.000 + +Well it's a straight fight here at Leicester…On the left of the Returning Officer [action] camera shows grey-suited man … you can see Arthur Smith, the Sensible candidate and his agent, [action] camera pans to silly people … and on the other side is the silly candidate Jethro Walrustitty with his agent and his wife. + +00:01:06.000 --> 00:01:12.000 + +Here is the result for Leicester. Arthur J. Smith… + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:16.000 + +Sensible Party + +00:01:16.000 --> 00:01:24.000 + +30,612…Jethro Q. Walrustitty… + +00:01:24.000 --> 00:01:28.000 + +Silly Party + +00:01:28.000 --> 00:01:34.000 + +32,108. + +00:01:34.000 --> 00:01:40.000 +[action] Cheering from the crowd. + +00:01:40.000 --> 00:01:50.000 + +[even more excited] Well, there's the first result and the Silly Party has held Leicester. What do you make of that, Norman? + +00:01:50.000 --> 00:02:00.000 +[action] Cut to Norman, very excited. + +00:02:00.000 --> 00:02:10.000 + +Well, this is largely as I predicted, except that the Silly Party won. I think this is largely due to the number of votes cast. Gerald? + +00:02:10.000 --> 00:02:18.000 +[action] Cut to Gerald by the 'swingometer'. + +00:02:18.000 --> 00:02:26.000 + +Well there's a swing here to the Silly Party…but how big a swing I'm not going to tell you. + +00:02:26.000 --> 00:02:34.000 +[action] Cut to George by another swingometer. + +00:02:34.000 --> 00:02:52.000 + +Well, if I may…I think the interesting thing here is the big swing to the Silly Party and of course the very large swing back to the Sensible Party…and a tendency to wobble up and down in the middle because the screw's loose. + +00:02:52.000 --> 00:02:56.000 + +No, I'm afraid I can't think of anything. + +00:02:56.000 --> 00:03:02.000 + +I can't add anything to that. Colin? + +00:03:02.000 --> 00:03:10.000 + +Can I butt in at this point and say this is in fact the very first time I've appeared on television. + +00:03:10.000 --> 00:03:18.000 + +No, no we haven't time, because we're just going straight over to Luton. + +00:03:18.000 --> 00:03:28.000 +[action] Cut to Luton Town Hall. Sensible, Silly and Slightly Silly candidates present. + +00:03:28.000 --> 00:03:46.000 + +Here at Luton it's a three-cornered fight between Alan Jones - Sensible Party, in the middle, Tarquin Fin- tim- lim- bim- whin- bim- lim- bus- stop- F'tang- F'tang- Olè- Biscuitbarrel - Silly Party, and Kevin Phillips-Bong, the Slightly Silly candidate. + +00:03:46.000 --> 00:03:52.000 + +Alan Jones… + +00:03:52.000 --> 00:03:58.000 + +On the left, Sensible Party + +00:03:58.000 --> 00:04:06.000 + +9,112… Kevin Phillips-Bong… + +00:04:06.000 --> 00:04:12.000 + +On the right, Slightly Silly. + +00:04:12.000 --> 00:04:22.000 + +Nought…Tarquin Fin- tim- lin- bin- whin- bim- lin- bus- stop- F'tang- F'tang- Olé- Biscuitbarrel… + +00:04:22.000 --> 00:04:26.000 + +Silly. + +00:04:26.000 --> 00:04:34.000 + +12,441. + +00:04:34.000 --> 00:04:40.000 + +And so the Silly Party has taken Luton. + +00:04:40.000 --> 00:04:48.000 + +A gain for the Silly Party at Luton. The first gain of the election, Norman? + +00:04:48.000 --> 00:05:00.000 + +Well this is a highly significant result. Luton, normally a very sensible constituency with a high proportion of people who aren't a bit silly, has gone completely ga-ga. + +00:05:00.000 --> 00:05:06.000 + +Do we have the swing at Luton? + +00:05:06.000 --> 00:05:12.000 + +Well, I've worked out the swing, but it's a secret. + +00:05:12.000 --> 00:05:20.000 + +Er, well, ah, there…there isn't the swing, how about a swong? + +00:05:20.000 --> 00:05:30.000 + +Well, I've got the swong here in this box and it's looking fine. I can see through the breathing holes that it's eating up peanuts at the rate of knots. + +00:05:30.000 --> 00:05:36.000 + +And how about the swang? + +00:05:36.000 --> 00:05:46.000 + +Well, it's 29% up over six hunded feet but it's a little bit soft around the edges about… + +00:05:46.000 --> 00:05:54.000 + +What do you make of the nylon dot cardigan and plastic mule rest? + +00:05:54.000 --> 00:05:58.000 + +There's no such thing. + +00:05:58.000 --> 00:06:02.000 + +Thank you, Spike. + +00:06:02.000 --> 00:06:10.000 + +Can I just come in here and say that the swong has choked itself to death. + +00:06:10.000 --> 00:06:16.000 + +Well, the election's really beginning to hot up now. + +00:06:16.000 --> 00:06:20.000 + +I can't add anything to that. + +00:06:20.000 --> 00:06:28.000 + +Can I just add at this point that this is in fact the second time I've ever been on television? + +00:06:28.000 --> 00:06:36.000 + +I'm sorry, Sasha, we're just about to get another result. + +00:06:36.000 --> 00:06:46.000 +[action] Harpenden Town Hall with a large number of candidates. + +00:06:46.000 --> 00:07:04.000 + +Hello, from Harpenden. This is a key seat because in addition to the official Silly candidate there is an independent Very Silly candidate [action] in large cube of polystyrene with only legs sticking out … who may split the silly vote. + +00:07:04.000 --> 00:07:12.000 + +Mrs Elsie Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz… [action] obvious man in drag with enormous joke breasts. + +00:07:12.000 --> 00:07:16.000 + +Silly. + +00:07:16.000 --> 00:07:24.000 + +26,317… James Walker… + +00:07:24.000 --> 00:07:28.000 + +Sensible. + +00:07:28.000 --> 00:07:34.000 + +26,318. + +00:07:34.000 --> 00:07:38.000 + +That was close. + +00:07:38.000 --> 00:08:14.000 + +Malcolm Peter Brian Telescope Adrian Umbrella Stand Jasper Wednesday [sfx] pops mouth twice … Stoatgobbler John Raw Vegetable [sfx] horse whinnying … Arthur Norman Michael [sfx] blows squeaker … Featherstone Smith [sfx] blows whistle … Northgot Edwards Harris [sfx] fires pistol, which goes 'whoop' … Mason [sfx] chuff-chuff-chuff … Frampton Jones Fruitbat Gilbert [sings] 'We'll keep a welcome in the' [sfx] three shots, stops singing … Williams If I Could Walk That Way Jenkin [sfx] squeaker … Tiger-draws Pratt Thompson [sings] 'Raindrops Keep Falling On My Head' … Darcy Carter [sfx] horn … Pussycat 'Don't Sleep In The Subway' … Barton Mannering [sfx] hoot, 'whoop' … Smith. + +00:08:14.000 --> 00:08:18.000 + +Very Silly. + +00:08:18.000 --> 00:08:22.000 + +Two. + +00:08:22.000 --> 00:08:28.000 + +Well there you have it. A Sensible gain at Driffield. + +00:08:28.000 --> 00:08:34.000 +[action] Back to the studio. + +00:08:34.000 --> 00:08:36.000 + +Norman + +00:08:36.000 --> 00:08:46.000 + +Well, I've just heard from Luton that my auntie's ill, er, possibly, possibly gastro-enteritis - Gerald. + +00:08:46.000 --> 00:08:54.000 + +Er, well, if this were repeated over the whole country it's probably be very messy. Colin. + +00:08:54.000 --> 00:09:02.000 + +Can I just butt in and say here that it's probably the last time I shall ever appear on television. + +00:09:02.000 --> 00:09:26.000 + +No I'm afraid you can't, we haven't got time. Just to bring you up to date with a few results, er, that you may have missed. Engelbert Humperdinck has taken Barrow-in-Furness, that's a gain from Ann Haydon-Jones and her husband Pip. Arthur Negus has held Bristols. That's not a result, that's a bit of gossip. Er…Mary Whitehouse has just taken umbrage. Could it be a bit of trouble there. And apparently Wales is not swinging at all. No surprise there. And…Monty Python has held the credits. + +00:09:26.000 --> 00:09:40.000 +[action] Roll credits. Lots of activity from experts behind. + +00:09:40.000 --> 00:09:46.000 +[caption] SUPERIMPOSED FLASHING CAPTION: 'NO CHANGE' + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_19_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/1_It's_a_Living.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_19_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/1_It's_a_Living.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..bdbdb574 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_19_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/1_It's_a_Living.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,17 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated placeholder timings. Skit starts at anchor #1. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Quiz show set-up. Two contestants either side, compère in the middle. Back wall reads 'It's a Living'. Music plays brightly. Track quickly into compère. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:10.000 +[caption] 'IT'S A LIVING' + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:01:10.000 + +Hello, good evening, and welcome to 'It's A Living'. The rules are very simple: each week we get a large fee; at the end of that week we get another large fee; if there's been no interruption at the end of the year we get a repeat fee which can be added on for tax purposes to the previous year or the following year if there's no new series. Every contestant, in addition to getting a large fee is entitled to three drinks at the BBC or if the show is over, seven drinks - unless he is an MP, in which case he can have seven drinks before the show, or a bishop only three drinks in toto. The winners will receive an additional fee, a prize which they can flog back and a special fee for a guest appearance on 'Late Night Line Up'. Well, those are the rules, that's the game, we'll be back again same time next week. Till then. Bye-bye. + +00:01:10.000 --> 00:01:15.000 +[action] Cut to BBC world symbol. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_19_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/2_The_time_on_BBC_1.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_19_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/2_The_time_on_BBC_1.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..5614e7b4 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_19_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/2_The_time_on_BBC_1.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,45 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated placeholder timings. Skit starts at anchor #2. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:18.000 + +Well, it's five past nine and nearly time for six past nine. On BBC 2 now it'll shortly be six and a half minutes past nine. Later on this evening it'll be ten o'clock and at 10.30 we'll be joining BBC 2 in time for 10.33, and don't forget tomorrow when it'll be 9.20. Those of you who missed 8.45 on Friday will be able to see it again this Friday at a quarter to nine. Now here is a time check. It's six and a half minutes to the big green thing. + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:22.000 + +You're a loony. + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:28.000 + +I get so bored. I get so bloody bored. + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:45.000 +[action] ANIMATION: Strange things happen for a minute or two until the animated title sequence. Cut to the announcer in a silly location, sitting at his desk. + +00:00:45.000 --> 00:00:56.000 + +You probably noticed that I didn't say 'and now for something completely different' just now. This is simply because I am unable to appear in the show this week. [action] looks closely at script, puzzled. Sorry to interrupt you. + +00:00:56.000 --> 00:01:02.000 +[action] Cut to a man holding his mouth open to show the camera his teeth. + +00:01:02.000 --> 00:01:08.000 + +I'm terribly sorry to interrupt but my tooth's hurting, just around here. + +00:01:08.000 --> 00:01:12.000 + +Get off. + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:16.000 + +Oh, sorry. + +00:01:16.000 --> 00:01:26.000 +[action] Cut to pompous moustached stockbroker type. + +00:01:26.000 --> 00:01:40.000 + +I'm not sorry to interrupt - I'll interrupt anything if it gets people looking in my direction - like at my old school where, by a coincidence, the annual prize giving is going on at this very moment. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_19_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/3_School_prize-giving.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_19_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/3_School_prize-giving.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..d17ff9b5 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_19_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/3_School_prize-giving.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,46 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated placeholder timings. Skit starts at anchor #3. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:10.000 +[action] Ripple effect and muted trumpet segue. Mix to trumpeter at a school prize giving. Long table with distinguished people seated. + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:22.000 + +My Lord Mayor, Lady Mayoress, it gives me very great pleasure to return to my old school, to present the prizes in this centenary year. This school takes very justifiable pride in its fine record of… aaaaagh! + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:36.000 +[action] Hands pull him down behind the table. Fighting, punching, struggle, grunts etc. No reaction from guests. Bishop's head reappears briefly. + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:44.000 + +… scholarship and sporting achievement in all… aaaagh! + +00:00:44.000 --> 00:00:54.000 +[action] He disappears again. More noises. Up comes another bishop dressed identically. + +00:00:54.000 --> 00:01:22.000 + +I'm, I'm afraid there's been a mistake. The man who has been speaking to you is an impostor. He is not in fact the Bishop of East Anglia, but a man wanted by the police. I am the Bishop of East Anglia and anyone who doesn't believe me can look me up in the book. Now then, the first prize is this beautiful silver cup, which has been won by me. [action] he puts the silver cup into a sack. Next we come to the Fairfax Atkinson Trophy for outstanding achievement in the field of Applied Mathematics. Well, there was no-one this year who reached the required standard so it goes in my sack. And by an old rule of the school all the other silver trophies also go in my sack … aaagh! + +00:01:22.000 --> 00:01:34.000 +[action] He is dragged down. More fighting, noisier than before. A Chinaman in Mao jacket and cap appears. + +00:01:34.000 --> 00:01:52.000 + +Velly solly for hold-up … no ploblem now … me are Bishop of East Anglia, now piesent plizes … Eyes down for first plize … The Fyffe-Chulmleigh Spoon for Latin Elegaics… goes to … People's Republic of China! Aaaagh! + +00:01:52.000 --> 00:02:04.000 +[action] Dragged down like the others. Sound of struggle, thumps etc. A plainclothes policeman stands up. + +00:02:04.000 --> 00:02:20.000 + +Good evening, everybody. My name's Bradshaw - Inspector Elizabeth Bradshaw, of the Special Branch Speech Day Squad, but I'd like you to think of me as the Bishop of East Anglia, and I'd like to present the first prize, the Grimwade Gynn Trophy to… + +00:02:20.000 --> 00:02:40.000 +[action] A shot. He leaps backwards. Machine guns and exploding shells. Two soldiers in camouflage rush up, exchange fire, firing a bazooka. + +00:02:40.000 --> 00:03:20.000 + +[shouting] Lord Mayor, Lady Mayoress, ladies, gentlemen and boys. Please do not panic. Please keep your heads right down now, and at the back please keep your heads right down. Do not panic, don't look round - this building is surrounded. There is nothing to worry about. I am the Bishop of East Anglia. Now the first prize is the Granville Cup for French Unseen Translation … [action] explosion and smoke, debris over the stage … and it goes to Forbes Minor… Forbes Minor … right, give him covering fire … [action] explosion … Come on Forbes. Come on boy. Come and get it. Keep down. [action] a wretched schoolboy appears on the stage keeping his head down … Well done… [action] he manages to get the cup but as he stands to shake hands he is shot … Oh… bad luck! The next prize… + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_19_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/4_'if'_-_a_film_by_Mr_Dibley.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_19_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/4_'if'_-_a_film_by_Mr_Dibley.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..112c2638 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_19_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/4_'if'_-_a_film_by_Mr_Dibley.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,15 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated placeholder timings. Skit starts at anchor #4. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:08.000 +[action] Picture on a TV monitor. Pull out to reveal late-night discussion studio set. + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:28.000 + +Mr L.F. Dibley's latest film 'if'. [action] turns to Dibley. Mr Dibley, some people have drawn comparisons between your film, 'if', which ends with a gun battle at a public school, and Mr Lindsay Anderson's film, 'if', which ends with a gun battle at a public school. + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:58.000 + +Oh yes, well, I mean, there were some people who said my film '2001 - A Space Odyssey', was similar to Stanley Kubrick's. I mean, that's the sort of petty critical niggling that's dogged my career. It makes me sick. I mean, as soon as I'd made 'Midnight Cowboy' with the vicar as Ratso Rizzo, John Schlesinger rushes out his version, and gets it premiered while mine's still at the chemist's. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_19_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/5_'Rear_Window'_-_a_film_by_Mr_Dibley.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_19_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/5_'Rear_Window'_-_a_film_by_Mr_Dibley.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..eeed1e75 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_19_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/5_'Rear_Window'_-_a_film_by_Mr_Dibley.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,15 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated placeholder timings. Skit starts at anchor #5. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:14.000 + +Well, we have with us tonight one of your films, 'Rear Window', which was to become such a success for Alfred Hitchcock a few weeks later. Now this is a silent film, so perhaps you could talk us through it… + +00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:28.000 +[action] Dim, shaky 8mm shot of a window. It is open. After a few seconds a man appears, looks out, performs exaggerated horror and points at camera. He disappears, then reappears. + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:56.000 + +Yes, well, let's see now … there's the rear window. There's the man looking out of the window. He sees the murder. The murderer's come into the room to kill him, but he's outwitted him and he's all right. The End. I mean, Alfred Hitchcock, who's supposed to be so bloody wonderful, padded that out to one and a half hours … lost all the tension … just because he had bloody Grace Kelly he made £3 million more than I did. Mind you, at least she can act a bit, I could have done with her in 'Finian's Rainbow' … The man from the off-licence was terrible … a real failure that was - ten seconds of solid boredom. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_19_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/6_'Finian's_Rainbow'_(starring_the_man_from_the_off-license).vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_19_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/6_'Finian's_Rainbow'_(starring_the_man_from_the_off-license).vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..1b734ca1 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_19_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/6_'Finian's_Rainbow'_(starring_the_man_from_the_off-license).vtt @@ -0,0 +1,17 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated placeholder timings. Skit starts at anchor #6. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:10.000 +[caption] Shaky titles: Mr Dibley's 'Finian's Rainbow starring the man from the off-licence'. + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:22.000 +[action] The man from the off-licence by a tennis-court in a dress, trying to say something; he has forgotten his words. He does an unconvincing little dance. + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:26.000 +[caption] 'THE END' + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:32.000 + +Bloody terrible. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_19_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/7_Foreign_Secretary.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_19_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/7_Foreign_Secretary.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..66535a74 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_19_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/7_Foreign_Secretary.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,62 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated placeholder timings. Skit starts at anchor #7. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:16.000 + +Mr L. F. Dibley's 'Finian's Rainbow'. And now over to me. [action] close-up of interviewer. Exclusively on the programme today we have the Foreign Secretary, who has just returned from the bitter fighting in the Gulf of Amman. He's going to tell us about canoeing. + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:34.000 +[action] River bank seen from opposite side. A canoe is on the bank; a man in pinstripes stands beside it. He coughs and gets in. + +00:00:34.000 --> 00:00:40.000 +[caption] SUPERIMPOSE CAPTION: 'THE FOREIGN SECRETARY' + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:52.000 +[action] Two Arabs run in, lift the canoe and throw it and the Foreign Secretary into the water. Cut back to interviewer. + +00:00:52.000 --> 00:01:10.000 + +That gives you just some idea of what's going on out there. Today saw the long-awaited publication of the Portman Committee's Report on Industrial Reorganization… + +00:01:10.000 --> 00:01:14.000 +[caption] 'SOMETHING SILLY'S GOING TO HAPPEN' + +00:01:14.000 --> 00:01:34.000 + +It's taken five years to prepare and it's bound to have an enormous impact on the future of industrial relations in this country. In the studio tonight Lord Porlman, Chairman of the Committee, Sir Charles Avery, Employers' Reorganization Council, and Ray Millichope, leader of the Allied Technicians' Union. And they're going to make a human pyramid. + +00:01:34.000 --> 00:01:46.000 +[action] Three men in shorts run on to tinkly music and form a pyramid. Cut to film of Vatican crowds with enormous ovation dubbed. + +00:01:46.000 --> 00:01:52.000 + +Bra… vo. Now the President of the Board of Trade… + +00:01:52.000 --> 00:02:06.000 +[action] Same river bank from across the river. The President of the Board of Trade in pinstripes stands beside a hamper, smiles, gets in, lowers lid. Two Arabs throw it in. Speeded up. + +00:02:06.000 --> 00:02:12.000 + +Now here's the Vice-Chairman of ICI. + +00:02:12.000 --> 00:02:22.000 +[action] Same river bank. A head looking out of the hamper, disappears as two Arabs toss it in. + +00:02:22.000 --> 00:02:54.000 + +Well, so much for politics and the problems of Britain's industrial reorganization. Now we turn to the lighter subject of sport, and Reg Harris, the former world cycling sprint champion, talks to us about the psychological problems of big race preparation. [action] Reg and his bike are thrown in the river by the Arabs. And now the world of song - Anne Zeigler and Webster Booth. [action] two hampers thrown in river by four Arabs. Well, all good things must come to an end, and that's all for this week. But to close our programme, Dame Irene Stoat, who celebrates her eighty-fifth birthday this month, reads one of her most famous poems. + +00:02:54.000 --> 00:03:10.000 +[action] River bank. An old lady stands on the near bank. On the far bank the Arabs run in, realize they're foiled and leap in anger. + +00:03:10.000 --> 00:03:40.000 + +Who shall declare this good, that ill / When good and ill so intertwine / But to fulfil the vast design of an omniscient will. / When seeming again but turns to loss / When earthly treasure proves but dross / And what seems lost but turns again / To high eternal gain. + +00:03:40.000 --> 00:03:52.000 +[action] Arabs run out of vision. A Samurai warrior with drawn sword leaps from beside camera, screams, hurls her into the water, strikes heroic pose. + +00:03:52.000 --> 00:03:58.000 +[caption] 'NEWHAVEN - LE HAVRE. GETAWAY TO THE CONTINENT' + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_19_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/8_Dung.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_19_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/8_Dung.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..585de7f4 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_19_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/8_Dung.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,120 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated placeholder timings. Skit starts at anchor #8. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:12.000 +[action] Smart dinner party, two couples in evening dress at table. Candles and fire; muted music. + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:18.000 + +We had the most marvelous holiday. It was absolutely fantastic. + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:22.000 + +Absolutely wonderful. + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:26.000 + +Michael, you tell them about it. + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:30.000 + +No, darling, you tell them. + +00:00:30.000 --> 00:00:34.000 + +You do it so much better. + +00:00:34.000 --> 00:00:38.000 +[action] Doorbell rings. + +00:00:38.000 --> 00:00:42.000 + +Excuse me a moment. + +00:00:42.000 --> 00:00:56.000 +[action] Host answers door that opens into dining room. A large grubby man with a tub on his shoulder enters; flies buzzing. + +00:00:56.000 --> 00:01:00.000 + +Dung, sir. + +00:01:00.000 --> 00:01:04.000 + +What? + +00:01:04.000 --> 00:01:08.000 + +We've got your dung. + +00:01:08.000 --> 00:01:12.000 + +What dung? + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:26.000 + +Your dung. Three hundredweight of heavy droppings. Where do you want it? [action] looks around for a place. + +00:01:26.000 --> 00:01:30.000 + +I didn't order any dung. + +00:01:30.000 --> 00:01:36.000 + +Yes you did, sir. You ordered it through the Book of the Month Club. + +00:01:36.000 --> 00:01:40.000 + +Book of the Month Club? + +00:01:40.000 --> 00:01:56.000 + +That's right, sir. You get 'Gone with the Wind', 'Les Miserables' by Victor Hugo, 'The French Lieutenant's Woman' and with every third book you get dung. + +00:01:56.000 --> 00:02:02.000 + +I didn't know that when I signed the form. + +00:02:02.000 --> 00:02:16.000 + +Well, no, no. It wasn't on the form - they found it wasn't good for business. Anyway, we've got three hundredweight of dung in the van. Where do you want it? + +00:02:16.000 --> 00:02:22.000 + +Well, I don't think we do. We've no garden. + +00:02:22.000 --> 00:02:28.000 + +Well, it'll all fit in here - it's top-class excrement. + +00:02:28.000 --> 00:02:34.000 + +You can't put it in here, we've having a dinner party! + +00:02:34.000 --> 00:02:40.000 + +'Salright. I'll put it on the telly. + +00:02:40.000 --> 00:02:48.000 +[action] He brings dung into the dining room. The guests ignore him. + +00:02:48.000 --> 00:02:56.000 + +Darling… there's a man here with our Book of the Month Club dung. + +00:02:56.000 --> 00:03:00.000 + +We've no room, dear. + +00:03:00.000 --> 00:03:06.000 + +Well, how many rooms have you got, then? + +00:03:06.000 --> 00:03:14.000 + +Well, there's only this room, the bedroom, a spare room. + +00:03:14.000 --> 00:03:22.000 + +Oh well, I'll tell you what, move everything into the main bedroom, then you can use the spare room as a dung room. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_19_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/9_Dead_Indian.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_19_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/9_Dead_Indian.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..b5a3f79b --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_19_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/9_Dead_Indian.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,107 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated placeholder timings. Skit starts at anchor #9. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:10.000 +[action] Doorbell goes. A gas board official stands at open door with a dead Indian over his shoulders. + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:14.000 + +Yes. + +00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:18.000 + +Dead Indian. + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:22.000 + +What? + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:28.000 + +Have you recently bought a new cooker, sir? + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:32.000 + +Yes. + +00:00:32.000 --> 00:00:40.000 + +Ah well, this is your free dead Indian, as advertised… + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:46.000 + +I didn't see that in the adverts… + +00:00:46.000 --> 00:00:54.000 + +No, it's in the very small print, you see, sir, so as not to affect the sales. + +00:00:54.000 --> 00:01:00.000 + +We've no room. + +00:01:00.000 --> 00:01:08.000 + +That's all right - you can put the dead Indian in the spare room on top of the dung. + +00:01:08.000 --> 00:01:14.000 + +Me … heap dizzy. + +00:01:14.000 --> 00:01:18.000 + +He's not dead! + +00:01:18.000 --> 00:01:24.000 + +Oh well, that's probably a faulty cooker. + +00:01:24.000 --> 00:01:32.000 +[action] Phone rings. Wife goes to answer it. + +00:01:32.000 --> 00:01:38.000 + +Have you, er… you read and enjoyed 'The French Lieutenant's Woman', then? + +00:01:38.000 --> 00:01:42.000 + +No. + +00:01:42.000 --> 00:01:48.000 + +No… still, it's worth it for the dung, isn't it? + +00:01:48.000 --> 00:02:02.000 + +Darling, it's the Milk Marketing Board. For every two cartons of single cream we get the M4 motorway. + +00:02:02.000 --> 00:02:18.000 +[action] Cut to host and hostess bewildered in the middle of a motorway. Beside them a steaming pile of dung and a dead Indian. A police car roars up; two policemen leap out. + +00:02:18.000 --> 00:02:24.000 + +Are you Mr and Mrs P. Forbes of 7, the Studios, Elstree? + +00:02:24.000 --> 00:02:28.000 + +Yes. + +00:02:28.000 --> 00:02:36.000 + +Right, well, get in the car. We've won you in a police raffle. + +00:02:36.000 --> 00:02:44.000 +[action] Speeded up, they are bundled into the car. Cut to inspector. + +00:02:44.000 --> 00:03:08.000 + +Yes! This couple is just one of the prizes in this year's Police Raffle. Other prizes include two years for breaking and entering, a crate of search warrants, a 'What's all this then?' T-shirt and a weekend for two with a skinhead of your own choice. + +00:03:08.000 --> 00:03:12.000 +[caption] 'STOP-PRESS' + +00:03:12.000 --> 00:03:28.000 + +And that's not all. Three fabulous new prizes have just been added, a four-month supply of interesting undergarments [caption: picture], a fully motorized pig [caption: picture c/o Mr Gilliam], and a hand-painted scene of Arabian splendour, complete with silly walk. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_20_-_'The_Attila_the_Hun_Show'/0_Episode20_head_tail.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_20_-_'The_Attila_the_Hun_Show'/0_Episode20_head_tail.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..f5a59bfa --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_20_-_'The_Attila_the_Hun_Show'/0_Episode20_head_tail.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,100 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Intro titles and end credits for Episode Twenty. Auto-generated placeholder timings. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Stock film of fast moving Huns thundering around on horseback. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:20.000 + +In the fifth century, as the once-mighty Roman Empire crumbled, the soft underbelly of Western Europe lay invitingly exposed to the barbarian hordes to the East. Alaric the Visigoth, Galseric the Vandal and Theodoric the Ostrogoth in turn swept westward in a reign of terror. But none surpassed in power and cruelty the mighty Attila the Hun. + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:24.000 + +Ladies and gentlemen, it's the 'The Attila the Hun Show'. + +00:00:24.000 --> 00:00:36.000 +[action] Film parody credits play to 'The Debbie Reynolds Show' theme. Attila and Mrs Attila frolic in slow motion. CAPTION: 'THE ATTILA THE HUN SHOW'. + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:48.000 +[caption] STARRING ATTILA THE HUN / AND KAY SLUDGE AS MRS ATTILA THE HUN / WITH TY GUDRUN AND NIK CON AS JENNY AND ROBIN ATTILA THE HUN / MUSIC BY THE HUNLETS + +00:00:48.000 --> 00:00:56.000 +[action] More stock film of fast-moving Huns on horseback. + +00:00:56.000 --> 00:01:06.000 + +In the second quarter of the fifth century, the Huns became a byword for merciless savagery. Their Khan was the mighty warrior Attila. With his devastating armies he swept across Central Europe. + +00:01:06.000 --> 00:01:12.000 +[action] Cut to American living room style set. Doorbell rings. Attila enters. + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:14.500 + +Oh darling, I'm home. + +00:01:14.500 --> 00:01:18.500 + +Hello darling. Had a busy day at the office? + +00:01:18.500 --> 00:01:24.000 + +Not at all bad. [action] (playing to camera) Another merciless sweep across Central Europe. + +00:01:24.000 --> 00:01:26.000 +[caption] Canned laughter. + +00:01:26.000 --> 00:01:30.000 + +I won't say I'm glad to see you, but boy, am I glad to see you. + +00:01:30.000 --> 00:01:34.000 +[caption] Enormous canned laughter and applause. Two kids enter. + +00:01:34.000 --> 00:01:36.500 + +Hi, daddy. + +00:01:36.500 --> 00:01:38.500 + +Hi, daddy. + +00:01:38.500 --> 00:01:46.000 + +Hi, Jenny, hi, Robby. [caption] (brief canned applause) [action] Hey, I've got a present for you two kids in that bag. (they pull out a severed head) I want you kids to get a-head. + +00:01:46.000 --> 00:01:50.000 +[caption] Enormous shriek of canned laughter and applause. [action] Enter ‘Uncle Tom’ with tray of drinks. + +00:01:50.000 --> 00:01:52.000 + +Hear you are, Mr Hun! + +00:01:52.000 --> 00:01:54.000 +[caption] Masses of dubbed applause. + +00:01:54.000 --> 00:01:55.500 + +Hi, Uncle Tom. + +00:01:55.500 --> 00:02:00.000 + +There's a whole horde of them marauding Visigoths to see y'all. + +00:02:00.000 --> 00:02:06.000 +[action] Cut to stock film of Huns on horseback. Superimposed announcer at desk. + +00:02:06.000 --> 00:02:08.500 + +And now for something completely different. + +00:02:08.500 --> 00:02:10.500 + +It's … + +00:02:10.500 --> 00:02:16.000 +[caption] Massive canned applause. [action] Animated credit titles. + +00:28:00.000 --> 00:28:06.000 +[caption] Roll credits over. CAPTION: THE END + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_20_-_'The_Attila_the_Hun_Show'/10_Today_in_Parliament.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_20_-_'The_Attila_the_Hun_Show'/10_Today_in_Parliament.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..6f5bb716 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_20_-_'The_Attila_the_Hun_Show'/10_Today_in_Parliament.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,12 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit begins at anchor #10. Auto-generated placeholder timings. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:05.000 + +And while that's going on, here from Westminster is a parliamentary report for Humans. + +00:00:05.000 --> 00:01:00.000 + +In the debate, a spokesman accused the goverment of being silly and doing not at all good things. The member accepted this in the spirit of healthy criticism, but denied that he had ever been naughty with a choir boy. Angry shouts of 'What about the Watermelon then?' were ordered then by the speaker to be stricken from the record and put into a brown paper bag in the lavvy. Any further interruptions would be cut up and distributed amongst the poor. For the Government, a front-bench spokesman said the Agricultural Tariff would have to be raised, and he fancied a bit. Futhermore, he argued, this would give a large boost to farmers, him, his friends, and Miss Moist of Knightsbridge. From the back benches there were opposition shouts of 'Postcards for sale' and a healthy cry of 'Who likes a sailor then?' from the minister without portfolio. Replying, the Shadow Minister said he could no longer deny the rumors, but he and the Dachshund were very happy. And in any case he argued Rhubarb was cheap, and what was the harm in a sauna bath? + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_20_-_'The_Attila_the_Hun_Show'/11_The_news_for_wombats.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_20_-_'The_Attila_the_Hun_Show'/11_The_news_for_wombats.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..f88f4ef1 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_20_-_'The_Attila_the_Hun_Show'/11_The_news_for_wombats.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,11 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit begins at anchor #11. Auto-generated placeholder timings. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 +[caption] CAPTION: '7 Hours Later' [action] Return to original narrator. + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:40.000 + +…were not involved. The Minister of Technology [caption] (minister with a wombat on his shoulder) met the three Russian leaders [caption] (Russian leaders with wombats) today to discuss a £4 million airliner deal….none of them were indigenous to Australia, carried their young in pouches, or ate any of those yummy Eucalyptus leaves. Yum Yum. Thats the news for wombats, and now Attila the Bun! + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_20_-_'The_Attila_the_Hun_Show'/12_Attila_the_Bun.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_20_-_'The_Attila_the_Hun_Show'/12_Attila_the_Bun.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..9bccb25f --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_20_-_'The_Attila_the_Hun_Show'/12_Attila_the_Bun.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,11 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit begins at anchor #12. Auto-generated placeholder timings. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 +[action] Animation: a vicious rampaging bun. + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:08.000 + +Well that's all for Attila the Bun, and now - idiots! + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_20_-_'The_Attila_the_Hun_Show'/13_The_Idiot_in_Society.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_20_-_'The_Attila_the_Hun_Show'/13_The_Idiot_in_Society.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..3f3ff90f --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_20_-_'The_Attila_the_Hun_Show'/13_The_Idiot_in_Society.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,44 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit begins at anchor #13. Auto-generated placeholder timings. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Village idiot Arthur Figgis sits on a wall, making noises and rolling eyes. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:10.000 + +Arthur Figgis is an idiot. A village idiot. Tonight we look at the idiot in society. + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:28.000 + +[action] Extreme close-up of Figgis to camera. [tone] (educated) Well I feel very keenly that the idiot is a part of the old village system, and as such has a vital role to play in a modern rural society, because you see … [tone] (switches to rural) ooh ar ooh ar before the crops go gey are in the medley crun and the birds slides nightly on the oor ar … [action] (vicar passes; gives him sixpence) Ooh ar thankee, Vicar … [tone] (educated) There is this very real need in society for someone whom almost anyone can look down on and ridicule. And this is the role that … ooh ar naggy gamly rangle tandie oogly noogle Goblie oog … [action] (passing lady gives sixpence) Thank you, Mrs Thompson… this is the role that I and members of my family have fulfilled in this village for the past four hundred years… Good morning, Mr Jenkins, ICI have increased their half-yearly dividend, I see. + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:30.500 + +Yes, splendid. + +00:00:30.500 --> 00:00:36.000 + +That's Mr Jenkins - he's another idiot. And so you see the idiot does provide a vital psycho-social service for this community. Oh, excuse me, a coach party has just arrived. I shall have to fall off the wall, I'm afraid. + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:38.000 +[action] He falls backwards off the wall. Cut to suburban home; training equipment on lawn. Figgis runs into horse and falls. + +00:00:38.000 --> 00:00:44.000 + +Arthur takes idiotting seriously. He is up at six o'clock every morning working on special training equipment designed to keep him silly. And of course he takes great pride in his appearance. + +00:00:44.000 --> 00:00:48.000 +[action] Figgis, in clean smock, jumps into a pond, scrambles up, pats mud on face with a mirror. + +00:00:48.000 --> 00:00:54.000 + +Like the doctor, the blacksmith, the carpenter, Mr Figgis is an important figure in this village and - like them - he uses the local bank. + +00:00:54.000 --> 00:00:58.000 +[action] Village square bank. People giggle and point. Figgis does silly routine; enters bank. [caption] M. BRANDO - BANK MANAGER + +00:00:58.000 --> 00:01:00.500 + +Yes, we have quite a number of idiots banking here. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_20_-_'The_Attila_the_Hun_Show'/14_Test_match.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_20_-_'The_Attila_the_Hun_Show'/14_Test_match.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..2ff5ae84 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_20_-_'The_Attila_the_Hun_Show'/14_Test_match.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,65 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit begins at anchor #14. Auto-generated placeholder timings. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Wide shot of Lords. Cut to three TV commentators in a modern box, bottles around. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:42.000 + +Good afternoon and welcome to Lords on the second day of the first test. So far today we've had five hours batting from England and already they're nought for nought. Cowdrey is not out nought. Naughton is not in. Knott is in and is nought for not out. Naughton of Northants got a nasty knock on the nut in the nets last night but it's nothing of note. Next in is Nat Newton of Notts. Not Nutring - Nutting's at nine, er, Nutring knocked neatie nighty knock knock… … anyway England have played extremely well for nothing, not a sausage, in reply to Iceland's first innings total of 722 for 2 declared, scored yesterday disappointingly fast in only twenty-one overs with lots of wild slogging and boundaries and all sorts of rubbishy things. But the main thing is that England have made an absolutely outstanding start so far, Peter? + +00:00:42.000 --> 00:00:46.000 + +Splendid. Just listen to those thighs. And now it's the North East's turn with the Samba. Brian. + +00:00:46.000 --> 00:00:50.000 + +(he has an enormous nose) Rather. (opens book) I'm reminded of the story of Gubby Allen in '32. .. + +00:00:50.000 --> 00:00:54.000 + +Oh, shut up or we'll close the bar. And now Bo Wildeburg is running up to bowl to Cowdrey, he runs up, he bowls to Cowdrey… + +00:00:54.000 --> 00:00:56.000 +[action] Fast bowler bowls. Batsman makes no move. Ball passes off stump. + +00:00:56.000 --> 00:00:58.500 + +… and no shot at all. Extremely well not played there. + +00:00:58.500 --> 00:01:01.000 + +Yes, beautifully not done anything about. + +00:01:01.000 --> 00:01:04.000 + +A superb shot of no kind whatsoever. I well remember Plum Warner leaving a very similar ball alone in 1732. + +00:01:04.000 --> 00:01:10.000 + +Oh shut up, long nose. [action] Peter falls off his chair. And now it's Bo Wildeburg running in again to bowl to Cowdrey, he runs in. [action] (as before; ball goes by as before) He bowls to Cowdrey - and no shot at all, a superb display of inertia there… And that's the end of the over, and drinks. + +00:01:10.000 --> 00:01:12.000 + +Gin and tonic please. + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:22.000 + +No, no the players are having drinks. And now, what's happening? I think Cowdrey's being taken off. [action] (removers carry batsman off; two men carry a green Chesterfield toward wicket) Yes, Cowdrey is being carried off. Well I never. Now who's in next, it should be number three, Natt Newton of Notts… get your hand off my thigh, West… no I don't think it is… I think it's er, it's the sofa … no it's the Chesterfield! The green Chesterfield is coming in at number three to take guard now. + +00:01:22.000 --> 00:01:26.000 + +I well remember a similar divan being brought on at Headingley in 9 BC against the darkies. + +00:01:26.000 --> 00:01:30.000 + +Oh, shut up, elephant snout. And now the green Chesterfield has taken guard and Iceland are putting on their spin dryer to bowl. + +00:01:30.000 --> 00:01:40.000 +[action] Furniture fields: chairs in slips; easy chair keeping wicket; bidet mid on; TV at cover; bookcase mid off; desk square leg; radiator mid wicket. Spin dryer bowls to a table with pads. Ball hits pad. Appeal. + +00:01:40.000 --> 00:01:46.000 + +The spin dryer moves back to his mark, it runs out to the wicket, bowls to the table… a little bit short but it's coming in a bit there and it's hit him on the pad… and the table is out, leg before wicket. That is England nought for one. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_20_-_'The_Attila_the_Hun_Show'/15_The_Epsom_furniture_race.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_20_-_'The_Attila_the_Hun_Show'/15_The_Epsom_furniture_race.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..0e6fb75b --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_20_-_'The_Attila_the_Hun_Show'/15_The_Epsom_furniture_race.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,15 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit begins at anchor #15. Auto-generated placeholder timings. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 + +And now we leave Lords and go over to Epsom for the three o'clock. + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:08.000 +[action] Race course. Furniture races last fifty yards to finishing post. + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:28.000 + +Well here at Epsom we take up the running with fifty yards of this mile and a half race to go and it's the wash basin in the lead from WC Pedestal. Tucked in nicely there is the sofa going very well with Joanna Southcott's box making a good run from hat stand on the rails, and the standard lamp is failing fast but it's wash basin definitely taking up the running now being strongly pressed by … At the post it's the wash basin from WC then sofa, hat stand, standard lamp and lastly Joanna Southcott's box. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_20_-_'The_Attila_the_Hun_Show'/16_'Take_Your_Pick'.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_20_-_'The_Attila_the_Hun_Show'/16_'Take_Your_Pick'.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..b38952a5 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_20_-_'The_Attila_the_Hun_Show'/16_'Take_Your_Pick'.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,261 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit begins at anchor #16. Auto-generated placeholder timings. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Three bishops in studio audience shout. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:10.000 + +Open the box! Open the box! Open the box! Open the box! Open the box! + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:14.000 +[action] 'Take Your Pick'-style set. Michael Miles-type host grins at centre. + +00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:20.000 + +And could we have the next contender, please? [action] (a pepperpot walks out) Ha ha ha… Good evening, madam, and your name is? + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:21.500 + +Yes, yes… + +00:00:21.500 --> 00:00:24.000 + +And what's your name? + +00:00:24.000 --> 00:00:26.500 + +I go to church regularly. + +00:00:26.500 --> 00:00:30.000 + +Jolly good, I see, and which prize do you have particular eyes on this evening? + +00:00:30.000 --> 00:00:32.000 + +I'd like the blow on the head. + +00:00:32.000 --> 00:00:33.500 + +The blow on the head. + +00:00:33.500 --> 00:00:36.000 + +Just there. [action] (points to back of head) + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:44.000 + +Jolly good. Well your first question for the blow on the head this evening is: What great opponent of Cartesian dualism resists the reduction of psychological phenomena to physical states? + +00:00:44.000 --> 00:00:46.000 + +I don't know that! + +00:00:46.000 --> 00:00:48.000 + +Well, have a guess. + +00:00:48.000 --> 00:00:50.000 + +Henri Bergson. + +00:00:50.000 --> 00:00:52.000 + +Is the correct answer! + +00:00:52.000 --> 00:00:54.500 + +Ooh, that was lucky. I never even heard of him. + +00:00:54.500 --> 00:00:55.500 + +Jolly good. + +00:00:55.500 --> 00:00:57.500 + +I don't like darkies. + +00:00:57.500 --> 00:01:00.000 + +Ha ha ha. Who does? And now your second question for the blow on the head is: What is the main food that penguins eat? + +00:01:00.000 --> 00:01:02.000 + +Pork luncheon meat. + +00:01:02.000 --> 00:01:03.000 + +No. + +00:01:03.000 --> 00:01:04.500 + +Spam? + +00:01:04.500 --> 00:01:06.500 + +No, no, no. What do penguins eat? Penguins. + +00:01:06.500 --> 00:01:08.000 + +Penguins? + +00:01:08.000 --> 00:01:08.800 + +Yes. + +00:01:08.800 --> 00:01:10.500 + +I hate penguins. + +00:01:10.500 --> 00:01:11.300 + +No, no, no. + +00:01:11.300 --> 00:01:13.000 + +They eat themselves. + +00:01:13.000 --> 00:01:15.000 + +No, no, what do penguins eat? + +00:01:15.000 --> 00:01:17.000 + +Horses! … Armchairs! + +00:01:17.000 --> 00:01:19.000 + +No, no, no. What do penguins eat? + +00:01:19.000 --> 00:01:20.000 + +Oh, penguins. + +00:01:20.000 --> 00:01:21.000 + +Penguins. + +00:01:21.000 --> 00:01:22.000 + +Cannelloni. + +00:01:22.000 --> 00:01:22.800 + +No. + +00:01:22.800 --> 00:01:26.000 + +Lasagna, moussaka, lobster thermidor, escalopes de veau à l'estragon avec endives gratinéeed with cheese. + +00:01:26.000 --> 00:01:28.500 + +No, no, no, no. I'll give you a clue. [action] (mimes a fish swimming) + +00:01:28.500 --> 00:01:29.500 + +Ah! Brian Close. + +00:01:29.500 --> 00:01:30.500 + +No. no. + +00:01:30.500 --> 00:01:32.500 + +Brian Inglis, Brian Johnson, Bryan Forbes. + +00:01:32.500 --> 00:01:33.500 + +No, no! + +00:01:33.500 --> 00:01:34.500 + +Nanette Newman. + +00:01:34.500 --> 00:01:36.000 + +No. What swims in the sea and gets caught in nets? + +00:01:36.000 --> 00:01:37.000 + +Henri Bergson. + +00:01:37.000 --> 00:01:38.000 + +No. + +00:01:38.000 --> 00:01:40.000 + +Goats. Underwater goats with snorkels and flippers. + +00:01:40.000 --> 00:01:41.000 + +No, no. + +00:01:41.000 --> 00:01:42.000 + +A buffalo with an aqualung. + +00:01:42.000 --> 00:01:43.000 + +No, no. + +00:01:43.000 --> 00:01:44.000 + +Reginald Maudling. + +00:01:44.000 --> 00:01:48.000 + +Yes, that's near enough. I'll give you that. Right, now, Mrs Scum, you have won your prize, do you still want the blow on the head? + +00:01:48.000 --> 00:01:49.500 + +Yes, yes. + +00:01:49.500 --> 00:01:51.000 + +I'll offer you a poke in the eye. + +00:01:51.000 --> 00:01:52.000 + +No! I want a blow on the head. + +00:01:52.000 --> 00:01:53.000 + +A punch in the throat? + +00:01:53.000 --> 00:01:53.800 + +No. + +00:01:53.800 --> 00:01:55.500 + +All right then, a kick in the kneecap? + +00:01:55.500 --> 00:01:56.200 + +No. + +00:01:56.200 --> 00:01:58.500 + +Mrs Scum, I'm offering you a boot in the teeth and a dagger up the strap? + +00:01:58.500 --> 00:01:59.500 + +Er… + +00:01:59.500 --> 00:02:02.000 + +[crowd] Blow on the head! Take the blow on the head! + +00:02:02.000 --> 00:02:03.500 + +No, no. I'll take the blow on the head. + +00:02:03.500 --> 00:02:06.000 + +Very well then, Mrs Scum, you have won tonight's star prize, the blow on the head. + +00:02:06.000 --> 00:02:10.000 +[action] He strikes her with an enormous mallet; she falls unconscious. A sexily dressed hostess strikes a small gong. The three bishops rush in and jump on her. [caption] LICENCE FEES FROM 1ST JANUARY 1969 / COLOUR TV AND RADIO £11-0-0 / TV AND RADIO £6-0-0 / RADIO ONLY £1-5-0. CAPTION: THE END + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_20_-_'The_Attila_the_Hun_Show'/1_The_Attila_the_Hun_Show.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_20_-_'The_Attila_the_Hun_Show'/1_The_Attila_the_Hun_Show.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..5c49caf7 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_20_-_'The_Attila_the_Hun_Show'/1_The_Attila_the_Hun_Show.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,94 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit begins at anchor #1. Auto-generated placeholder timings. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 +[action] Stock film of fast moving Huns thundering around on horseback. + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:16.000 + +In the fifth century, as the once-mighty Roman Empire crumbled, the soft underbelly of Western Europe lay invitingly exposed to the barbarian hordes to the East. Alaric the Visigoth, Galseric the Vandal and Theodoric the Ostrogoth in turn swept westward in a reign of terror. But none surpassed in power and cruelty the mighty Attila the Hun. + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:20.000 + +Ladies and gentlemen, it's the 'The Attila the Hun Show'. + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:34.000 +[action] Debbie Reynolds Show-style opening: Attila runs to Mrs Attila; frolic in slow motion. CAPTION: 'THE ATTILA THE HUN SHOW'. Credits parody roll. + +00:00:34.000 --> 00:00:40.000 +[action] Stock film of Huns on horseback. + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:48.000 + +In the second quarter of the fifth century, the Huns became a byword for merciless savagery. Their Khan was the mighty warrior Attila. With his devastating armies he swept across Central Europe. + +00:00:48.000 --> 00:00:54.000 +[action] American living room set. Doorbell. Attila enters. + +00:00:54.000 --> 00:00:56.500 + +Oh darling, I'm home. + +00:00:56.500 --> 00:01:00.500 + +Hello darling. Had a busy day at the office? + +00:01:00.500 --> 00:01:06.500 + +Not at all bad. [action] (playing to camera) Another merciless sweep across Central Europe. + +00:01:06.500 --> 00:01:08.500 +[caption] Canned laughter. + +00:01:08.500 --> 00:01:12.500 + +I won't say I'm glad to see you, but boy, am I glad to see you. + +00:01:12.500 --> 00:01:16.500 +[caption] Enormous canned laughter and applause. [action] Two kids enter. + +00:01:16.500 --> 00:01:18.500 + +Hi, daddy. + +00:01:18.500 --> 00:01:20.500 + +Hi, daddy. + +00:01:20.500 --> 00:01:28.000 + +Hi, Jenny, hi, Robby. [caption] (brief canned applause) [action] I've got a present for you two kids in that bag. (they pull out a severed head) I want you kids to get a-head. + +00:01:28.000 --> 00:01:32.000 +[caption] Enormous shriek of canned laughter and applause. [action] Enter ‘Uncle Tom’, blacked up, with tray. + +00:01:32.000 --> 00:01:34.000 + +Hear you are, Mr Hun! + +00:01:34.000 --> 00:01:36.000 +[caption] Masses of dubbed applause. + +00:01:36.000 --> 00:01:38.000 + +Hi, Uncle Tom. + +00:01:38.000 --> 00:01:42.000 + +There's a whole horde of them marauding Visigoths to see y'all. + +00:01:42.000 --> 00:01:48.000 +[action] Cut to more stock film of Huns rushing on horseback. Superimposed announcer at desk. + +00:01:48.000 --> 00:01:50.500 + +And now for something completely different. + +00:01:50.500 --> 00:01:52.000 + +It's … + +00:01:52.000 --> 00:01:58.000 +[caption] Massive canned applause. [action] Animated credit titles. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_20_-_'The_Attila_the_Hun_Show'/2_Attila_the_Nun.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_20_-_'The_Attila_the_Hun_Show'/2_Attila_the_Nun.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..1b21e435 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_20_-_'The_Attila_the_Hun_Show'/2_Attila_the_Nun.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,54 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit begins at anchor #2. Auto-generated placeholder timings. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Country road. A wild-looking nun on a motorbike speeds toward camera. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:08.500 + +Yes, it's Attila the Nun. + +00:00:08.500 --> 00:00:12.000 +[action] Attila the Nun flashes past; loud off-camera crash. + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:16.000 + +A simple country girl who took a vow of eternal brutality. + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:24.000 +[action] Hospital bed: Attila the Nun struggles. Two doctors and a nurse try to restrain her. Another doctor summons the nurse away. + +00:00:24.000 --> 00:00:25.500 + +Nurse! + +00:00:25.500 --> 00:00:34.000 +[action] Camera tracks to another bed: Miss Norris sits revealingly. Screens placed around. Doctor and nurse enter. + +00:00:34.000 --> 00:00:36.500 + +Hello, Miss Norris. How are you? + +00:00:36.500 --> 00:00:38.500 + +Not too bad, thank you, doctor. + +00:00:38.500 --> 00:00:42.500 + +Yes, well I think I'd better examine you. + +00:00:42.500 --> 00:00:48.000 +[action] A line of shabby men in filthy macs shuffle in and leer at foot of bed. + +00:00:48.000 --> 00:00:50.500 + +What are they doing here? + +00:00:50.500 --> 00:01:04.000 + +It's all right, they're students. Um… lights please, nurse. [action] (single red spotlight spills down) Oh… and… er… music, too. [action] (stripper music; men get very exalted) Breathe in … out … in … out… + +00:01:04.000 --> 00:01:08.000 +[caption] Music reaches climax and ends. Men in macs applaud. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_20_-_'The_Attila_the_Hun_Show'/3_Secretary_of_State_striptease.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_20_-_'The_Attila_the_Hun_Show'/3_Secretary_of_State_striptease.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..6cb91535 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_20_-_'The_Attila_the_Hun_Show'/3_Secretary_of_State_striptease.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,28 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit begins at anchor #3. Auto-generated placeholder timings. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Seedy strip club. Curtains swish shut revealing stage. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:14.000 + +Thank you, thank you. Charles Crompton, the Stripping Doctor. And next, gentlemen and ladies, here at the Peephole Club for the very first time - a very big welcome please for the Secretary of State for Commonwealth Affairs. + +00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:18.000 +[action] Curtains open. Compère leaves. A city gent steps into spotlight. + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:01:08.000 + +Good evening. Tonight I'd like to restate our position on agricultural subsidies, [action] (soft breathy jazzy music; he starts to strip) and their effect on our Commonwealth relationships. Now although we believe, theoretically, in ending guaranteed farm prices, we also believe in the need for a corresponding import levy to maintain consumer prices at a realistic level. But this would have the effect of consolidating our gains of the previous fiscal year, prior to the entry. But I pledge that should we join the Common Market - even maintaining the present position on subsidies - we will never jeopardize, we will never compromise our unique relationship with the Commonwealth countries. A prices structure related to any import charges will be systematically adjusted to the particular requirements of our Commonwealth partners [action] (now in tassels and briefs; revolves nipple tassels) - so that together we will maintain a positive, and mutually beneficial alliance in world trade [action] (turns; revolves buttock tassels) and for world peace. Thank you and goodnight. + +00:01:08.000 --> 00:01:12.000 +[action] He removes last tassel with flourish. Blackout. Curtains close. Compère bounces back. + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:18.000 + +Wasn't he marvellous? The Secretary of State for Commonwealth Affairs! And now gentlemen and ladies, a very big welcome please for the Minister of Pensions and Social Security! + +00:01:18.000 --> 00:01:24.000 +[action] Burst of Turkish music; curtains swish back; another minister enters doing a Turkish dance. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_20_-_'The_Attila_the_Hun_Show'/4_Vox_pops_on_politicians.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_20_-_'The_Attila_the_Hun_Show'/4_Vox_pops_on_politicians.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..3ac616d4 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_20_-_'The_Attila_the_Hun_Show'/4_Vox_pops_on_politicians.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,50 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit begins at anchor #4. Auto-generated placeholder timings. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Still of Houses of Parliament. Slow track in. Patriotic music. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:10.000 + +Yes, today in Britain there is a new wave of interest in politics and politicians. + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:14.000 +[action] Vox pops outside Houses of Parliament. [caption] A GROUPIE + +00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:17.500 + +Well, we're just in it for the lobbying, you know. We just love lobbying. + +00:00:17.500 --> 00:00:21.000 + +And the debates - you know a good debate … is just… fabulous. + +00:00:21.000 --> 00:00:24.000 + +Well, I've been going with ministers for five years now and, you know… I think they're wonderful. + +00:00:24.000 --> 00:00:26.000 + +Oh yes, I like civil servants. + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:28.000 + +Oh yes, they're nice. + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:29.500 + +I like the Speaker. + +00:00:29.500 --> 00:00:31.000 + +Oh yes. + +00:00:31.000 --> 00:00:33.000 + +I like Black Rod. + +00:00:33.000 --> 00:00:36.000 + +What do their parents think? + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_20_-_'The_Attila_the_Hun_Show'/5_Ratcatcher.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_20_-_'The_Attila_the_Hun_Show'/5_Ratcatcher.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..2043f679 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_20_-_'The_Attila_the_Hun_Show'/5_Ratcatcher.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,71 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit begins at anchor #5. Auto-generated placeholder timings. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Interior: Concretes' sitting room. Mrs Concrete knits. Mr Concrete enters. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:08.500 + +Have you been talking to television again, dear? + +00:00:08.500 --> 00:00:10.000 + +Yes, I bloody told 'em. + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:11.500 + +What about? + +00:00:11.500 --> 00:00:12.500 + +I dunno. + +00:00:12.500 --> 00:00:14.500 + +Was it Reginald Bosanquet? + +00:00:14.500 --> 00:00:16.000 + +No, no, no. + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:18.500 + +Did he have his head all bandaged? + +00:00:18.500 --> 00:00:22.000 + +No, it wasn't like that. They had lots of lights and cameras and tape recorders and all that sort of thing. + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:30.000 + +Oh, that'll be Ray Baxter and the boys and girls from 'Tomorrow's World'. Oh, I prefer Reginald Bosanquet, there's not so many of them. [action] (doorbell rings) Oh - that'll be the ratcatcher. (she lets the ratcatcher in) + +00:00:30.000 --> 00:00:32.000 + +Hello - Mr and Mrs Concrete? + +00:00:32.000 --> 00:00:34.000 + +[dialogue] Yes. + +00:00:34.000 --> 00:00:44.000 + +Well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, well, how very nice. Allow me to introduce myself. I am Leslie Ames, the Chairman of the Test Selection Committee, and I'm very pleased to be able to tell you that your flat has been chosen as the venue for the third test against the West Indies. + +00:00:44.000 --> 00:00:45.500 + +Really? + +00:00:45.500 --> 00:00:48.500 + +No, it was just a little joke. Actually, I am the Council Ratcatcher. + +00:00:48.500 --> 00:00:50.500 + +Oh yes, we've been expecting you. + +00:00:50.500 --> 00:00:53.000 + +Oh, I gather you've got a little rodental problem. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_20_-_'The_Attila_the_Hun_Show'/6_Wainscotting.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_20_-_'The_Attila_the_Hun_Show'/6_Wainscotting.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..18decb3a --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_20_-_'The_Attila_the_Hun_Show'/6_Wainscotting.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,118 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit begins at anchor #6. Auto-generated placeholder timings. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.500 + +Oh, blimey. You'd think he was awake all the night, scrabbling down by the wainscotting. + +00:00:04.500 --> 00:00:06.500 + +Um, that's an interesting word, isn't it? + +00:00:06.500 --> 00:00:07.500 + +What? + +00:00:07.500 --> 00:00:12.000 + +Wainscotting … Wainscotting … Wainscotting … sounds like a little Dorset village, doesn't it? Wainscotting. + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:16.000 +[action] Cut to village of Wains Cotting. A woman rushes out of a house. + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:18.000 + +We've been mentioned on telly! + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:20.000 +[action] Cut back to Concretes' house. + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:22.000 + +Now, where is it worst? + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:24.000 + +Well, down here. You can usually hear them. + +00:00:24.000 --> 00:00:26.000 +[action] Label on base of wall: 'Wainscotting'. + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:27.000 + +Sssssh + +00:00:27.000 --> 00:00:30.000 +[caption] Baa … baa … baa … baa … + +00:00:30.000 --> 00:00:32.000 + +No, that's sheep you've got there. + +00:00:32.000 --> 00:00:33.000 +[caption] Baa … baa. + +00:00:33.000 --> 00:00:36.000 + +No, that's definitely sheep. A bit of a puzzle, really. + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:37.500 + +Is it? + +00:00:37.500 --> 00:00:42.000 + +Yeah, well, I mean it's (a) not going to respond to a nice piece of cheese and (b) it isn't going to fit into a trap. + +00:00:42.000 --> 00:00:44.000 + +Oh - what are you going to do? + +00:00:44.000 --> 00:00:46.000 + +Well, we'll have to look for the hole. + +00:00:46.000 --> 00:00:48.000 +[action] They search along the wainscotting. + +00:00:48.000 --> 00:00:50.000 + +Oh yeah. There's one here. + +00:00:50.000 --> 00:00:52.000 +[action] Small black mousehole indicated. + +00:00:52.000 --> 00:00:54.000 + +No, no, that's mice. + +00:00:54.000 --> 00:00:57.000 +[action] He pulls out a string of mice on elastic; lets go; they snap back. + +00:00:57.000 --> 00:01:00.000 +[action] Moves a chair to reveal a three-foot-high black hole. + +00:01:00.000 --> 00:01:02.000 + +Ah, this is what we're after. + +00:01:02.000 --> 00:01:06.000 +[caption] Baa-ings get louder. [action] Six cricketers enter the room. + +00:01:06.000 --> 00:01:08.500 + +Excuse me, is the third test in here? + +00:01:08.500 --> 00:01:10.500 + +No - that was a joke - a joke! + +00:01:10.500 --> 00:01:12.000 + +Oh blimey, [action] (they exit) + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:14.000 + +Right. Well, I'm going in the wainscotting. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_20_-_'The_Attila_the_Hun_Show'/7_Killer_sheep.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_20_-_'The_Attila_the_Hun_Show'/7_Killer_sheep.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..0a226cdd --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_20_-_'The_Attila_the_Hun_Show'/7_Killer_sheep.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,89 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit begins at anchor #7. Auto-generated placeholder timings. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[caption] Poster: 'Wanted For Armed Robbery - Basil' with a picture of a sheep. Exciting crime music. Newspaper headlines montage. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:10.000 +[action] Laboratory: scientist at microscope with busty assistant. + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:15.000 + +It's an entirely new strain of sheep, a killer sheep that can not only hold a rifle but is also a first-class shot. + +00:00:15.000 --> 00:00:17.500 + +But where are they coming from, professor? + +00:00:17.500 --> 00:00:32.000 + +That I don't know. I just don't know. I really just don't know. I'm afraid I really just don't know. I'm afraid even I really just don't know. I have to tell you I'm afraid even I really just don't know. I'm afraid I have to tell you… [action] (she hands him water) … thank you … [tone] (resuming breezy voice) … I don't know. Our only clue is this portion of wolf's clothing which the killer sheep … + +00:00:32.000 --> 00:00:34.000 + +… was wearing… + +00:00:34.000 --> 00:00:36.000 + +… in yesterday's raid on Selfridges. + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:38.500 + +I'll carry out tests on it straight away, professor. + +00:00:38.500 --> 00:00:42.000 +[action] She opens another lab door: it's full of cricketers. + +00:00:42.000 --> 00:00:44.000 + +Hello, is the third test in here, please? + +00:00:44.000 --> 00:00:45.500 +[action] She slams the door. + +00:00:45.500 --> 00:00:47.500 + +Professor, there are some cricketers in the laboratory. + +00:00:47.500 --> 00:00:54.000 + +This may be even more serious than even I had at first been imagining. What a strange… strange line. There's no time to waste. Get me the Chief Commissioner of Police. + +00:00:54.000 --> 00:00:56.000 + +Yes, sir! + +00:00:56.000 --> 00:01:00.000 +[action] She opens a cupboard and slides out the Chief Commissioner on a slab. He grins and waves. 'This Is Your Life' music and applause. + +00:01:00.000 --> 00:01:01.500 + +No, no, on the phone. + +00:01:01.500 --> 00:01:03.000 + +Oh… [action] (pushes him back in) + +00:01:03.000 --> 00:01:06.000 + +Look of fear! [action] (stares at doorway) Another strange line. Look out, Miss Garter Oil! + +00:01:06.000 --> 00:01:08.000 + +Professor! What is it? What have you seen? + +00:01:08.000 --> 00:01:10.000 + +Look - there, in the doorway. + +00:01:10.000 --> 00:01:14.000 +[action] Animation: huge sheep with an eye patch appears in doorway. + +00:01:14.000 --> 00:01:16.000 + +Urghhh! Arthur X! Leader of the Pennine Gang! + +00:01:16.000 --> 00:01:28.000 +[action] Gilliam animation: armed sheep raids, Basil Cassidy and the Sundance Sheep, machine-gun-bottom sheep, etc. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_20_-_'The_Attila_the_Hun_Show'/8_The_news_for_parrots.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_20_-_'The_Attila_the_Hun_Show'/8_The_news_for_parrots.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..69332ec9 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_20_-_'The_Attila_the_Hun_Show'/8_The_news_for_parrots.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,38 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit begins at anchor #8. Auto-generated placeholder timings. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 + +And parrots started to announce television programmes. It's 8 o'clock and time for the News. + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:01:00.000 + +Good evening. Here is the news for Parrots. No parrots were involved in an accident on the M1 today when a lorry carrying high-octane fuel was in collison with a bollard. That's a bollard and not a parrot. A spokesman for parrots said he was glad no parrots were involved. The Minister of Technology [caption] (photo of minister with parrot on his shoulder) today met the three Russian leaders [caption] (Brezhnev, Podgorny and Kosygin each with a parrot) to discuss a £4 million airliner deal… [action] (cut back) None of them went in the cage, or swung on the little wooden trapeze or ate any of the nice millet seed yum, yum. That's the end of the news, now our program for parrots continues with part three of 'A Tale of Two Cities', specially adapted for parrots by Joey Boy. The story so far, Dr. Manette is in England after eighteen years [action] (French Revolution music creeps in) in the Bastille. His daughter Lucy awaits her lover Charles Darney, who we have just learned is in fact the nephew of the Marquis de St Evremond, whose cruelty had placed Manette in the Bastille. Darney arrives to find Lucy tending her aged father. + +00:01:00.000 --> 00:01:04.000 +[caption] SUPERIMPOSED CAPTION: 'LONDON 1793' [action] Mix to 18th-century living room. Lucy nurses her father. + +00:01:04.000 --> 00:01:06.000 +[action] Door bursts open. Charles Darnay enters. + +00:01:06.000 --> 00:01:08.000 + +(in parrot voice) 'Allo, 'allo. + +00:01:08.000 --> 00:01:09.500 + +'Allo, 'allo, 'allo. + +00:01:09.500 --> 00:01:11.000 + +'Allo, 'allo, 'allo. + +00:01:11.000 --> 00:01:13.000 + +Who's a pretty boy, then? + +00:01:13.000 --> 00:01:15.000 + +'Allo, 'allo, 'allo. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_20_-_'The_Attila_the_Hun_Show'/9_The_news_for_gibbons.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_20_-_'The_Attila_the_Hun_Show'/9_The_news_for_gibbons.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..5d6621c6 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_20_-_'The_Attila_the_Hun_Show'/9_The_news_for_gibbons.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,8 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit begins at anchor #9. Auto-generated placeholder timings. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:08.000 + +And while that's going on, here is the news for gibbons. No gibbons were involved in… + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_21_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/0_Episode21_head_tail.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_21_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/0_Episode21_head_tail.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..be9b3c89 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_21_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/0_Episode21_head_tail.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,22 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Separate file for intro and credits. Auto-generated placeholder timings. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 +[title] Episode Twenty-one + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:08.000 +[links] Trailer | 'Archaeology Today' | Silly vicar | Leapy Lee | Registrar (wife swap) | Silly doctor sketch (immediately abandoned) | Mr and Mrs Git | Mosquito hunters | Poofy judges | Mrs Thing and Mrs Entity | Beethoven's mynah bird | Shakespeare | Michaelangelo | Colin Mozart (ratcatcher) | Judges + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:12.000 +[colour code] John Cleese | Michael Palin | Eric Idle | Graham Chapman | Terry Jones | Terry Gilliam | Carol Cleveland + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:18.000 +[intro action] 'Grandstand' signature tune starts and then abruptly cuts into the usual animated credit titles. + +00:04:00.000 --> 00:04:20.000 +[credits] Superimposed credits roll over judges' robing room while theme plays quietly. + +00:04:20.000 --> 00:04:28.000 +[sign-off] Fade out. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_21_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/10_Mrs_Thing_and_Mrs_Entity.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_21_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/10_Mrs_Thing_and_Mrs_Entity.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..0d1a92ef --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_21_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/10_Mrs_Thing_and_Mrs_Entity.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,138 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated placeholder timings. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Fade in to a bench in a public park. Pepperpot sits; another arrives pushing shopping trolley. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:08.000 + +Hello, Mrs Thing. + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:10.000 + +Hello, Mrs Entity. + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:12.000 + +How are you then? + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:16.000 + +Oh, I have had a morning. + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:18.000 + +Busy? + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:28.000 + +Busy - huh! I got up at five o'dock, I made myself a cup of tea, I looked out of the window. Well, by then I was so worn out I had to come and have a sit-down. I've been here for seven hours. + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:31.000 + +You must be exhausted. + +00:00:31.000 --> 00:00:34.000 + +Mm. Oh, have you been shopping? + +00:00:34.000 --> 00:00:36.000 + +No, I've been shopping. + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:38.000 + +Funny. + +00:00:38.000 --> 00:00:42.000 + +I'm worn out. I've been shopping for six hours. + +00:00:42.000 --> 00:00:44.000 + +What have you bought, then? + +00:00:44.000 --> 00:00:48.000 + +Nothing. Nothing at all. A complete waste of time. + +00:00:48.000 --> 00:00:50.000 + +Wicked, isn't it? + +00:00:50.000 --> 00:00:54.000 + +Wicked. It'll be worse when we join the Common Market. + +00:00:54.000 --> 00:00:58.000 + +That nice Mr Heath would never allow that. + +00:00:58.000 --> 00:01:02.000 + +It's funny he never married. + +00:01:02.000 --> 00:01:04.000 + +He's a bachelor. + +00:01:04.000 --> 00:01:10.000 + +Oooh! That would explain it, Oh dear me, this chatting away wears me out. + +00:01:10.000 --> 00:01:18.000 + +Yes. I bet Mrs Reginald Maudling doesn't have to put up with all this drudgery, getting up at five in the morning, making a cup of tea, looking out of the window, chatting away. + +00:01:18.000 --> 00:01:22.000 + +No! It'd all be done for her. + +00:01:22.000 --> 00:01:26.000 + +Yes, she'd have the whole day free for playing snooker. + +00:01:26.000 --> 00:01:31.000 + +She probably wouldn't go through all the drudgery of playing snooker, day in, day out. + +00:01:31.000 --> 00:01:36.000 + +No, it would all be done for her. She wouldn't even have to lift the cue. + +00:01:36.000 --> 00:01:40.000 + +She probably doesn't even know where the billlard room is. + +00:01:40.000 --> 00:01:48.000 + +No, still, it's not as bad as the old days. Mrs Stanley Baldwin used to have to get up at five o'clock in the morning and go out and catch partridges with her bare hands. + +00:01:48.000 --> 00:01:56.000 + +Yes… and Mrs William Pitt the Elder used to have to get up at three o'clock and go burrowing for truffles with the bridge of her nose. + +00:01:56.000 --> 00:02:02.000 + +Mrs Beethoven used to have to get up at midnight to spur on the mynah bird. + +00:02:02.000 --> 00:02:06.000 + +Lazy creatures, mynah birds,.. + +00:02:06.000 --> 00:02:10.000 + +Yes. When Beethoven went deaf the mynah bird just used to mime. + +00:02:10.000 --> 00:02:14.000 +[action] Picture wobbles like a flashback; dreamy music. + +00:02:14.000 --> 00:02:16.000 + +[looking at camera] Ooh! What's happening? + +00:02:16.000 --> 00:02:18.000 + +It's all right. It's only a flashback. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_21_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/11_Beethoven's_mynah_bird.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_21_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/11_Beethoven's_mynah_bird.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..57e0fda5 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_21_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/11_Beethoven's_mynah_bird.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,140 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated placeholder timings. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Beethoven's living room. A model mynah bird opens and shuts its beak. Beethoven sits at the piano. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:10.000 + +You don't fool me, you stupid mynah bird. I'm not deaf yet. + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:16.000 + +Just you wait… ha, ha, ha, ha, ha! [action] Beethoven pulls a revolver and shoots the bird; it falls. + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:18.000 + +Oh! Bugger… + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:20.000 + +Shut up! + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:22.000 + +Right in the wing. + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:28.000 + +Shut your beak. Gott in Himmel… I never get any peace here. + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:36.000 +[action] He plays the first few notes of the fifth symphony, trying vainly to get the last note. + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:38.000 + +Ludwig! + +00:00:38.000 --> 00:00:40.000 + +What? + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:42.000 + +Have you seen the sugar bowl? + +00:00:42.000 --> 00:00:46.000 + +No, I haven't seen the bloody sugar bowl. + +00:00:46.000 --> 00:00:48.000 + +You know … the sugar bowl. + +00:00:48.000 --> 00:00:58.000 + +Sod the sugar bowl… I'm trying to finish this stinking tune! It's driving me spare … so shut up! [action] he plays opening bars of 'Washington Post March'; rejects it. + +00:00:58.000 --> 00:01:02.000 +[action] Mrs Beethoven comes back in. + +00:01:02.000 --> 00:01:06.000 + +Ludwig, have you seen the jam spoon? + +00:01:06.000 --> 00:01:08.000 + +Stuff the jam spoon! + +00:01:08.000 --> 00:01:10.000 + +It was in the sugar bowl. + +00:01:10.000 --> 00:01:16.000 + +Look, get out you old rat-bag. Buzz off and shut up. + +00:01:16.000 --> 00:01:20.000 + +I don't know what you see in that piano. + +00:01:20.000 --> 00:01:28.000 +Leave me alone!! … [action] gets the first eight notes right at last … Ha! ha! ha! I've done it, I've done it! + +00:01:28.000 --> 00:01:32.000 +[action] Mrs Beethoven returns. + +00:01:32.000 --> 00:01:36.000 + +Do you want peanut butter or sandwich spread for your tea? + +00:01:36.000 --> 00:01:38.000 + +What!!!! + +00:01:38.000 --> 00:01:40.000 + +PEANUT BUTTER… + +00:01:40.000 --> 00:01:46.000 +I've forgotten it. [action] plays a few wrong notes; I had it! I had it! + +00:01:46.000 --> 00:01:50.000 + +Do you want peanut butter or sandwich spread? + +00:01:50.000 --> 00:01:54.000 + +I don't care!! + +00:01:54.000 --> 00:01:58.000 + +Ooooh! I don't know. + +00:01:58.000 --> 00:02:10.000 +I had it. I had it you old bag. [action] As he gets it right again, door flies open and Mrs Beethoven charges in with a very loud vacuum. Terrible clanking and banging from the wall. + +00:02:10.000 --> 00:02:12.000 + +Mein lieber Gott. What are you doing? + +00:02:12.000 --> 00:02:14.000 + +[still vacuuming loudly] It's the plumber! + +00:02:14.000 --> 00:02:18.000 +[action] Jarring doorbell ring adds to the din. + +00:02:18.000 --> 00:02:22.000 + +Gott in Himmel, I'm going out. + +00:02:22.000 --> 00:02:28.000 + +Well, if you're going out don't forget we've got the Mendelssohns coming for tea so don't forget to order some pikelets. + +00:02:28.000 --> 00:02:32.000 + +Pikelets, pikelets. Shakespeare never had this trouble. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_21_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/12_Shakespeare.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_21_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/12_Shakespeare.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..67098b15 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_21_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/12_Shakespeare.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,11 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated placeholder timings. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Shakespeare washing up at a sink, present day. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:12.000 + +You wanna bet? Incidentally, its da-da-da-dum, da-da-da-dum. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_21_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/13_Michaelangelo.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_21_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/13_Michaelangelo.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..759980a8 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_21_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/13_Michaelangelo.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,30 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated placeholder timings. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Michelangelo's studio. Surrounded by at least six screaming little babies. Statue of David in foreground. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:08.000 + +Thanks, but I've had a better idea. + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:12.000 +[action] Camera pans to plinth engraved 'Michelangelo's Fifth Symphony'. + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:14.000 + +Michelangelo! + +00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:16.000 + +Yes, dear! + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:18.000 + +I've had another son. + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:20.000 + +Oh, my life. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_21_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/14_Colin_Mozart_(ratcatcher).vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_21_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/14_Colin_Mozart_(ratcatcher).vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..072f0fac --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_21_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/14_Colin_Mozart_(ratcatcher).vtt @@ -0,0 +1,86 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated placeholder timings. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[caption] W. A. MOZART + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:14.000 +[action] Mozart scrubbing the floor. + +00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:24.000 + +[Jewish accent] Composer? Huh! I wouldn't wish it on my son. He's a sensitive boy, already. I'd rather he was a sewage attendant or a ratcatcher. + +00:00:24.000 --> 00:00:38.000 +[action] Exterior street with old-fashioned shops. Sign: 'Rodent Exterminating Boutique - Colin "Chopper" Mozart (Son Of Composer) Ratcatcher To The Nobility And Ordinary People, Too - Ici On Parle Portugaise'. A kid runs up with a cleft stick; Colin takes note, reads. + +00:00:38.000 --> 00:00:44.000 + +Aha! Rats at 42a Kartoffelnstrasse. Hey Mitzi! I gotta go to Potato Street. + +00:00:44.000 --> 00:00:46.000 + +Put your galoshes on. + +00:00:46.000 --> 00:00:54.000 +[action] Mozart leaps onto bike with two shrimp-nets and rides off. + +00:00:54.000 --> 00:00:58.000 +[caption] MUNICH 1821 + +00:00:58.000 --> 00:01:12.000 + +[shouting] Depressed by rats? Do mice get you down? Then why not visit Colin Mozart's Rodent Extermination Boutique. Rats extirpated, mice punished, voles torn apart by Colin Mozart, Munich's leading furry animal liquidator. + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:20.000 +[action] Colin cycles up to Beethoven's house. Noticeboard lists residents including MR AND MRS LUDWIG VAN BEETHOVEN (1770-1827) ACCEPT NO SUBSTITUTE. + +00:01:20.000 --> 00:01:22.000 +[caption] 13.4 SECONDS LATER + +00:01:22.000 --> 00:01:26.000 +[action] Mrs Beethoven opens front door. + +00:01:26.000 --> 00:01:28.000 + +Yes? + +00:01:28.000 --> 00:01:30.000 + +Colin Mozart. + +00:01:30.000 --> 00:01:38.000 + +Oh, thank goodness you've come. We're having a terrible time with them bleeding rats. I think they live in his stupid piano already. + +00:01:38.000 --> 00:01:44.000 +[action] They go into the house. We hear the first two bars of Beethoven's Fifth counterpointed by loud squeaking. + +00:01:44.000 --> 00:01:52.000 + +Get out the bloody piano you stupid furry bucktoothed gits! Get out! Gott in Himmel. Get your stinking tail out of my face. + +00:01:52.000 --> 00:02:04.000 +[action] Door opens: rats flying across room (thrown from out of vision), others scuttle (pulled by strings), others up wall. One sits on Beethoven's head. Deafening squealing. Beethoven plays on. Mozart and Mrs Beethoven try catching rats with shrimp-nets. + +00:02:04.000 --> 00:02:06.000 +[caption] 13.4 MINUTES LATER + +00:02:06.000 --> 00:02:14.000 +[action] Colin Mozart sits on piano and rakes the rat-infested room with machine-gunfire. + +00:02:14.000 --> 00:02:16.000 + +Shut up! + +00:02:16.000 --> 00:02:22.000 +[action] Picture wobbles and mixes back to pepperpots. + +00:02:22.000 --> 00:02:28.000 + +So anyway, Beethoven was rather glad when he went deaf. + +00:02:28.000 --> 00:02:40.000 +[action] Mix to Beethoven pushing keys of the keyboard, all that remains of his piano. He listens vainly. Mynah bird opens and shuts its beak. In the corner an old horn gramophone plays Jimmy Durante's 'I'm the Guy That Found the Lost Chord'. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_21_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/15_Judges.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_21_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/15_Judges.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..c14d5c2b --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_21_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/15_Judges.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,105 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated placeholder timings. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 + +Well, I was ever so glad they abolished hanging, you know, because that black cap just didn't suit me. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:10.000 + +Yes. Do you remember the Glasgow treason trial? + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:14.000 + +Oh yes, I wore a body stocking all through it. + +00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:16.000 + +No, hen, with the party afterwards. + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:22.000 + +Oh, that's right. You were walking out with that very butch Clerk of the Court. + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:26.000 + +That's right. Ooh, he made me want to turn Queen's evidence. + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:30.000 +[action] Superimposed credits. Theme tune heard quietly as judges continue. + +00:00:30.000 --> 00:00:34.000 + +Oh, me too. One summing up and I'm anybody's. + +00:00:34.000 --> 00:00:36.000 + +Anyway, Bailie Anderson. + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:38.000 + +Ooh, her? + +00:00:38.000 --> 00:00:44.000 + +Yes. She's so strict. She was on at me for giving dolly sentences, you know, specially in that arson case. + +00:00:44.000 --> 00:00:46.000 + +What was the verdict? + +00:00:46.000 --> 00:00:50.000 + +They preferred the brown wig. + +00:00:50.000 --> 00:00:54.000 + +Mm. I love the Scottish Assizes. I know what they mean by a really well-hung jury. + +00:00:54.000 --> 00:00:58.000 + +Ooh! Get back in the witness box, you're too sharp to live! + +00:00:58.000 --> 00:01:02.000 + +I'll smack your little botty! + +00:01:02.000 --> 00:01:04.000 + +Ooh! and again. + +00:01:04.000 --> 00:01:08.000 + +Have you tried that new body rub JP's use? + +00:01:08.000 --> 00:01:12.000 + +I had a magistrate in Bradford yesterday. + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:18.000 +Funnily enough I felt like one in a lunchtime recess today. [action] credits end + +00:01:18.000 --> 00:01:24.000 + +But the ones I really like are those voice over announcers on the BBC after the programs are over. + +00:01:24.000 --> 00:01:28.000 + +Oh, aye, of course, they're as bent as safety pins. + +00:01:28.000 --> 00:01:36.000 + +I know, but they've got beautiful speaking voices, haven't they? 'And now a choice of viewing on BBC Television.' + +00:01:36.000 --> 00:01:40.000 + +'Here are tonight's football results.' + +00:01:40.000 --> 00:01:42.000 + +Mmm. + +00:01:42.000 --> 00:01:46.000 +[action] Fade out. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_21_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/1_Trailer.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_21_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/1_Trailer.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..8d983776 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_21_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/1_Trailer.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,38 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated placeholder timings. Includes stage directions and captions in square brackets. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:05.000 +[action] BBC 1 World symbol appears. + +00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:35.000 + +Here is a preview of some of the programmes you'll be able to see coming shortly on BBC Television. To kick off with there's variety … [action: still picture of Peter West and Brian Johnston] Peter West and Brian Johnston star in 'Rain Stopped Play', a whacky new comedy series about the gay exploits of two television cricket commentators [action: photo of E. W. Swanton] with E. W. Swanton as Aggie the kooky Scots maid. + +00:00:35.000 --> 00:00:55.000 + +For those of you who don't like variety, there's variety, with Brian Close at the Talk of the Town. [action: Brian Close in cricket whites on a stage] And of course there'll be sport. + +00:00:55.000 --> 00:01:20.000 + +The Classics series [caption: 'The Classics'] return to BBC 2 with twenty-six episodes of John Galsworthy's 'Snooker My Way' [action: composite photo of Nyree Dawn Porter holding a snooker cue] with Nyree Dawn Porter repeating her triumph as Joe Davis. And of course there'll be sport. + +00:01:20.000 --> 00:01:45.000 + +Comedy is not forgotten [caption: 'Comedy'] with Jim Laker [action: photo of Laker] in 'Thirteen Weeks of Off-spin Bowling'. Jim plays the zany bachelor bowler in a new series of 'Owzat', with Anneley Brummond-Haye on Mr Softee [action: photo of same] as his wife. And of course there'll be sport. + +00:01:45.000 --> 00:02:10.000 + +'Panorama' will be returning, introduced [caption: 'Panorama' with photo of Tony Jacklin] as usual by Tony Jacklin, and Lulu [action: photo of Lulu] will be tackling the Old Man of Hoy [action: photo of same]. And for those of you who prefer drama - there's sport. + +00:02:10.000 --> 00:02:30.000 + +On 'Show of the Week' Kenneth Wostenholme sings. [action: still of him, superimposed over Flick Colby Dancers, Pans People, Ono] And for those of you who don't like television there's David Coleman. [action: picture of him smiling] And of course there'll be sport. + +00:02:30.000 --> 00:02:38.000 + +But now for something completely different - sport. + +00:02:38.000 --> 00:02:50.000 +[action] 'Grandstand' signature tune starts and then abruptly cuts into the usual animated credit titles. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_21_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/2_Archaeology_Today.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_21_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/2_Archaeology_Today.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..ce9a9bdc --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_21_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/2_Archaeology_Today.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,288 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated placeholder timings. Includes stage directions, captions, and speaker IDs. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:08.000 +[animation] A sketch about an archaeological find leads to: + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:12.000 +[caption] ARCHAEOLOGY TODAY + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:20.000 +[action] Interview set for archaeology program. Chairman and two guests sit in front of a blow-up of an old cracked pot. + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:26.000 + +Hello. On 'Archaeology Today' tonight I have with me Professor Lucien Kastner of Oslo University. + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:29.000 + +Good evening. + +00:00:29.000 --> 00:00:33.000 + +How tall are you, professor? + +00:00:33.000 --> 00:00:36.000 + +… I beg your pardon? + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:39.000 + +How tall are you? + +00:00:39.000 --> 00:00:43.000 + +I'm about five foot ten. + +00:00:43.000 --> 00:00:52.000 + +… and an expert in Egyptian tomb paintings. Sir Robert… [action: turning to Kastner] are you really five foot ten? + +00:00:52.000 --> 00:00:54.000 + +Yes. + +00:00:54.000 --> 00:01:02.000 + +Funny, you look much shorter than that to me. Are you slumped forward in your chair at all? + +00:01:02.000 --> 00:01:06.000 + +No, er I… + +00:01:06.000 --> 00:01:14.000 + +Sir Robert Eversley, who's just returned from the excavations in El Ara, and you must be well over six foot. Isn't that right, Sir Robert? + +00:01:14.000 --> 00:01:18.000 + +[action: puzzled] Yes. + +00:01:18.000 --> 00:01:22.000 + +In fact, I think you're six foot five aren't you? + +00:01:22.000 --> 00:01:24.000 + +Yes. + +00:01:24.000 --> 00:01:28.000 +[action] Applause from off. Sir Robert looks up in amazement. + +00:01:28.000 --> 00:01:38.000 + +Oh, that's marvelous. I mean you're a totally different kind of specimen to Professor Kastner. Straight in your seat, erect, firm. + +00:01:38.000 --> 00:01:43.000 + +Yes. I thought we were here to discuss archaeology. + +00:01:43.000 --> 00:01:58.000 + +Yes, yes, of course we are, yes, absolutely, you're absolutely right! That's positive thinking for you. [action: to Kastner] You wouldn't have said a thing like that, would you? You five-foot-ten weed. [action: he turns his back very ostentatiously on Kastner] Sir Robert Eversley, who's very interesting, what have you discovered in the excavations at El Ara? + +00:01:58.000 --> 00:02:06.000 + +[action: picking up a beautiful ancient vase] Well basically we have found a complex of tombs… + +00:02:06.000 --> 00:02:08.000 + +Very good speaking voice. + +00:02:08.000 --> 00:02:16.000 + +… which present dramatic evidence of Polynesian influence in Egypt in the third dynasty which is quite remarkable. + +00:02:16.000 --> 00:02:20.000 + +How tall were the Polynesians? + +00:02:20.000 --> 00:02:22.000 + +They were… + +00:02:22.000 --> 00:02:24.000 + +Sh! + +00:02:24.000 --> 00:02:30.000 + +Well, they were rather small, seafaring… + +00:02:30.000 --> 00:02:34.000 + +Short men, were they… eh? All squat and bent up? + +00:02:34.000 --> 00:02:38.000 + +Well, I really don't know about that… + +00:02:38.000 --> 00:02:41.000 + +Who were the tall people? + +00:02:41.000 --> 00:02:44.000 + +I'm afraid I don't know. + +00:02:44.000 --> 00:02:48.000 + +Who's that very tall tribe in Africa? + +00:02:48.000 --> 00:02:52.000 + +Well, this is hardly archaeology. + +00:02:52.000 --> 00:03:06.000 + +The Watutsi! That's it - the Watutsi! Oh, that's the tribe, some of them were eight foot tall. Can you imagine that. Eight foot of Watutsi. Not one on another's shoulders, oh no - eight foot of solid Watutsi. That's what I call tall. + +00:03:06.000 --> 00:03:10.000 + +Yes, but it's nothing to do with archaeology. + +00:03:10.000 --> 00:03:14.000 +[action: knocking Sir Robert's vase to the floor] Oh to hell with archaeology! + +00:03:14.000 --> 00:03:26.000 + +Can I please speak! I came all the way from Oslo to do this program! I'm a professor of archaeology. I'm an expert in ancient civilizations. All right, I'm only five foot ten. All right my posture is bad, all right I slump in my chair. But I've had more women than either of you two! I've had half bloody Norway, that's what I've had! So you can keep your Robert Eversley! And you can keep your bloody Watutsi! I'd rather have my little body… my little five-foot-ten-inch body… [action: he breaks down sobbing] + +00:03:26.000 --> 00:03:30.000 + +Bloody fool. Look what you've done to him. + +00:03:30.000 --> 00:03:32.000 + +Don't bloody fool me. + +00:03:32.000 --> 00:03:38.000 + +I'll do what I like, because I'm six foot five and I eat punks like you for breakfast. + +00:03:38.000 --> 00:03:42.000 +[action] Sir Robert floors the interviewer with a mighty punch. Interviewer looks up rubbing his jaw. + +00:03:42.000 --> 00:03:48.000 + +I'll get you for that, Eversley! I'll get you if I have to travel to the four corners of the earth! + +00:03:48.000 --> 00:03:56.000 +[action] Crash of music. Theme and film titles as for a Western. + +00:03:56.000 --> 00:03:59.000 +[caption] FLAMING STAR - THE STORY OF ONE MAN'S SEARCH FOR VENGEANCE IN THE RAW AND VIOLENT WORLD OF INTERNATIONAL ARCHAEOLOGY + +00:03:59.000 --> 00:04:06.000 +[action] Stock film of the pyramids (circa 1920). + +00:04:06.000 --> 00:04:09.000 +[caption] EGYPT- 1920 + +00:04:09.000 --> 00:04:18.000 +[action] An archaeological dig in a flat sandy landscape. Twenties' clothes. Pan across passages and trenches. + +00:04:18.000 --> 00:04:28.000 + +[voice over] The dig was going well that year, We had discovered some Hittite baking dishes from the fifth dynasty, and Sir Robert was happier than I had ever seen him. + +00:04:28.000 --> 00:04:35.000 +[action] Camera on Sir Robert digging. Hammond organ accompaniment. + +00:04:35.000 --> 00:04:45.000 + +[singing] Today I hear the robin sing; Today the thrush is on the wing; Today who knows what life will bring; Today… + +00:04:45.000 --> 00:04:50.000 +[action] He stops, picks up an object, blows dust off, looks wondrously. + +00:04:50.000 --> 00:04:58.000 + +Why, a Sumerian drinking vessel of the fourth dynasty. [singing] Today!!!! [speaks] Catalogue this pot, Danielle, it's fourth dynasty. + +00:04:58.000 --> 00:05:01.000 + +Oh, is it… ? + +00:05:01.000 --> 00:05:04.000 + +Yes, it's… Sumerian. + +00:05:04.000 --> 00:05:10.000 + +Oh, how wonderful! Oh, I am so happy for you. + +00:05:10.000 --> 00:05:28.000 + +I'm happy too, now at last we know there was a Sumerian influence here in Abu Simnel in the early pre-dynastic period, two thousand years before the reign of Tutankhamun, [singing] Today I hear the robin sing; Today the thrush is on the wing; [duet] Today who knows what life will bring. + +00:05:28.000 --> 00:05:34.000 +[action] They are about to embrace; jarring chord and long crash. Interviewer appears on edge of the dig in previous clothes. + +00:05:34.000 --> 00:05:38.000 + +All right Eversley, get up out of that trench. + +00:05:38.000 --> 00:05:41.000 + +Don't forget… I'm six foot five. + +00:05:41.000 --> 00:05:44.000 + +That doesn't worry me… Kastner. + +00:05:44.000 --> 00:05:48.000 +[action] He snaps his fingers. Professor Kastner appears, fawningly. + +00:05:48.000 --> 00:05:50.000 + +Here Lord. + +00:05:50.000 --> 00:05:52.000 + +Up! + +00:05:52.000 --> 00:05:56.000 +[action] Kastner leaps onto Interviewer's shoulders. + +00:05:56.000 --> 00:05:58.000 + +Eleven foot three! + +00:05:58.000 --> 00:06:02.000 + +I'm so tall! I am so tall! + +00:06:02.000 --> 00:06:04.000 + +Danielle! + +00:06:04.000 --> 00:06:08.000 +[action] Danielle leaps onto Sir Robert's shoulders. + +00:06:08.000 --> 00:06:12.000 + +Eleven foot six - damn you! Abdul + +00:06:12.000 --> 00:06:16.000 +[action] A servant appears on Kastner's shoulders. + +00:06:16.000 --> 00:06:18.000 + +Fifteen foot four! Mustapha! + +00:06:18.000 --> 00:06:22.000 +[action] A servant appears on Danielle's shoulders. + +00:06:22.000 --> 00:06:25.000 + +Nineteen foot three… damn you! + +00:06:25.000 --> 00:06:40.000 +[action] They charge and fight among trestle tables with rare pots, smashing them. Everyone lies dead in a pile of broken pottery. Interviewer crawls to camera, covered in blood, producing a microphone. + +00:06:40.000 --> 00:06:50.000 + +And there we end this edition of 'Archaeology Today'. Next week, the Silbury Dig by Cole Porter with Pearl Bailey and Arthur Negus. [action] He dies. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_21_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/3_Silly_vicar.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_21_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/3_Silly_vicar.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..66140b9c --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_21_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/3_Silly_vicar.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,22 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated placeholder timings. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 + +And now an appeal for sanity from the Reverend Arthur Belling. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:12.000 +[action] Studio. A vicar sits facing camera with an axe in his head. + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:01:00.000 + +You know, there are many people in the country today who, through no fault of their own, are sane. Some of them were born sane. Some of them became sane later in their lives. It is up to people like you and me who are out of our tiny little minds to try and help these people overcome their sanity. You can start in small ways with ping-pong ball eyes and a funny voice and then you can paint half of your body red and the other half green and then you can jump up and down in a bowl of treacle going 'squawk, squawk, squawk…' And then you can go 'Neurhhh! Neurhh!' and then you can roll around on the floor going 'pting pting pting' … [action] he rolls around on the floor + +00:01:00.000 --> 00:01:10.000 + +The Reverend Arthur Belling is Vicar of St Loony Up The Cream Bun and Jam. And now an appeal on behalf of the National Trust. + +00:01:10.000 --> 00:01:14.000 +[caption] AN APPEAL ON BEHALF OF THE NATIONAL TRUSS + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_21_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/4_Leapy_Lee.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_21_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/4_Leapy_Lee.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..aedad0e0 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_21_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/4_Leapy_Lee.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,14 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated placeholder timings. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Cut to a smartly dressed woman. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:01:10.000 + +Good evening. My name is Leapy Lee. No, sorry. That's the name of me favourite singer. My name is Mrs Fred Stone. No, no, Mrs Fred Stone is the wife of me favourite tennis player. My name is Bananas. No, no, that's me favourite fruit. I'm Mrs Nice- evening- out- at- the- pictures- then- perhaps- a- dance- at- a- club- and- back- to- his- place- for- a- quick- cup- of- coffee- and- little- bit- of - no! No, sorry, that's me favourite way of spending a night out. Perhaps I am Leapy Lee? Yes! I must be Leapy Lee! Hello fans! Leapy Lee here! [singing] Little arrows that will… [action: phone rings, she answers] Hello? … Evidently I'm not Leapy Lee. I thought I probably wouldn't be. Thank you, I'll tell them. [action: puts phone down] Hello. Hello, Denis Compton here. No no… I should have written it down. Now where's that number? [action: she looks in her bag, talks to herself] I'm Mao Tse Tung… I'm P. P. Arnold… I'm Margaret Thatcher … I'm Sir Gerald Nabarro … [action: she dials] Hello? Sir Len Hutton here. Could you tell me, please … oh, am I? Oh, thank you. [action: puts phone down] Good evening. I'm Mrs What-number-are-you-dialing-please? + +00:01:10.000 --> 00:01:16.000 +[action] A boxer rushes in and fells her with one blow. Cut to Women's Institute applauding. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_21_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/5_Registrar_(wife_swap).vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_21_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/5_Registrar_(wife_swap).vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..3ae93b28 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_21_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/5_Registrar_(wife_swap).vtt @@ -0,0 +1,110 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated placeholder timings. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:08.000 +[action] A man enters with a neat little bride to the Registrar of Marriages. + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:10.000 + +Good morning. + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:12.000 + +Good morning. + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:15.000 + +Are you the registrar? + +00:00:15.000 --> 00:00:18.000 + +I have that function. + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:27.000 + +I was here on Saturday, getting married to a blond girl, and I'd like to change please. I'd like to have this one instead please. + +00:00:27.000 --> 00:00:30.000 + +What do you mean? + +00:00:30.000 --> 00:00:40.000 + +Er, well, the other one wasn't any good, so I'd like to swap it for this one, please. Er, I have paid. I paid on Saturday. Here's the ticket. [action: gives marriage licence] + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:44.000 + +Ah, oh, no. That was when you were married. + +00:00:44.000 --> 00:00:54.000 + +Er, yes. That was when I was married to the wrong one. I didn't like the colour. This is the one I want to have, so if you could just change the forms round I can take this one back with me now. + +00:00:54.000 --> 00:00:56.000 + +I can't do that. + +00:00:56.000 --> 00:00:59.000 + +Look, make it simpler, I'll pay again. + +00:00:59.000 --> 00:01:02.000 + +No, you can't do that. + +00:01:02.000 --> 00:01:10.000 + +Look, all I want you to do is change the wife, say the words, blah, blab, blah, back to my place, no questions asked. + +00:01:10.000 --> 00:01:13.000 + +I'm sorry sir, but we're not allowed to change. + +00:01:13.000 --> 00:01:15.000 + +You can at Harrods. + +00:01:15.000 --> 00:01:17.000 + +You can't. + +00:01:17.000 --> 00:01:22.000 + +You can. I changed my record player and there wasn't a grumble. + +00:01:22.000 --> 00:01:24.000 + +It's different. + +00:01:24.000 --> 00:01:27.000 + +And I changed my pet snake, and I changed my Robin Day tie. + +00:01:27.000 --> 00:01:30.000 + +Well, you can't change a bloody wife! + +00:01:30.000 --> 00:01:33.000 + +Oh, all right! Well, can I borrow one for the weekend. + +00:01:33.000 --> 00:01:35.000 + +No! + +00:01:35.000 --> 00:01:39.000 + +Oh, blimey, I only wanted a jolly good… + +00:01:39.000 --> 00:01:46.000 +[action] A whistle blows. A referee runs on, takes his book out and proceeds to take the man's name amidst protests. + +00:01:46.000 --> 00:01:51.000 + +All right, break it up. What's your number, then? All right. Name? + +00:01:51.000 --> 00:01:53.000 + +Cook. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_21_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/6_Silly_doctor_sketch_(immediately_abandoned).vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_21_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/6_Silly_doctor_sketch_(immediately_abandoned).vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..0d4ab35e --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_21_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/6_Silly_doctor_sketch_(immediately_abandoned).vtt @@ -0,0 +1,58 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated placeholder timings. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:03.000 + +Next please. Name? + +00:00:03.000 --> 00:00:05.000 + +Er, Watson. + +00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:08.000 +[action] writing it down; Mr Watson. + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:10.000 + +Ah, no, Doctor. + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:12.000 + +Ah, Mr Doctor. + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:14.000 + +No, not Mr, Doctor. + +00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:16.000 + +Oh, Doctor Doctor. + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:18.000 + +No, Doctor Watson. + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:20.000 + +Oh, Doctor Watson Doctor. + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:22.000 + +Oh, just call me darling. + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:24.000 + +Hello, Mr Darling. + +00:00:24.000 --> 00:00:26.000 + +No, Doctor. + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:28.000 + +Hello Doctor Darling. + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:31.000 +[caption] THAT SKETCH HAS BEEN ABANDONED + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_21_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/7_Mr_and_Mrs_Git.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_21_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/7_Mr_and_Mrs_Git.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..a5e075b1 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_21_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/7_Mr_and_Mrs_Git.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,153 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated placeholder timings. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[animation] Leads into a cocktail party in Dulwich. Quiet party music. Constant chatter. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:12.000 + +Ah, John. Allow me to introduce my next-door neighbour. John Stokes, this is A Snivelling Little Rat-Faced Git. Ah! + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:22.000 + +Hello, I noticed a slight look of anxiety cross your face for a moment just then, but you needn't worry - I'm used to it. That's the trouble of having a surname like Git. + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:25.000 + +Oh … yes, yes. + +00:00:25.000 --> 00:00:36.000 + +We did think once of having it changed by deed-poll, you know - to Watson or something like that. But A Snivelling Little Rat-Faced Watson's just as bad eh? + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:39.000 + +Yes, yes, I suppose so. + +00:00:39.000 --> 00:00:44.000 +[action] Mrs Git approaches. + +00:00:44.000 --> 00:00:50.000 + +Oh, that's my wife. Darling! Come and meet Mr… what was it? + +00:00:50.000 --> 00:00:52.000 + +Stokes - John Stokes. + +00:00:52.000 --> 00:00:58.000 + +Oh yes. John Stokes, this is my wife, Dreary Fat Boring Old. + +00:00:58.000 --> 00:01:01.000 + +Oh, er, how do you do. + +00:01:01.000 --> 00:01:03.000 + +How do you do. + +00:01:03.000 --> 00:01:07.000 +[action] Mrs Stokes appears. + +00:01:07.000 --> 00:01:10.000 + +Darling, there you are! + +00:01:10.000 --> 00:01:12.000 + +Yes, yes, here I am, yes. + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:15.000 + +Oh, is this your wife? + +00:01:15.000 --> 00:01:22.000 + +Yes, yes, yes, this is the wife. Yes. Um darling, these, these are the Gits. + +00:01:22.000 --> 00:01:24.000 + +[slightly shocked] What? + +00:01:24.000 --> 00:01:26.000 + +The Gits. + +00:01:26.000 --> 00:01:31.000 + +Oh, heaven's sakes we are being formal. Does it have to be surnames? + +00:01:31.000 --> 00:01:44.000 + +Oh, no, no. Not at all. No. Um, no, this… this… this is my wife Norah, er, Norah Jane, Norah Jane Stokes. This is Snivelling Little Rat-Faced Git. And this is his wife Dreary Fat Boring Old Git. + +00:01:44.000 --> 00:01:49.000 + +I was just telling your husband what an awful bore it is having a surname like Git. + +00:01:49.000 --> 00:01:54.000 + +[understanding at last] OH Oh well, it's not that bad. + +00:01:54.000 --> 00:02:08.000 + +Oh, you've no idea how the kids get taunted. Why, only last week Dirty Lying Little Two-Faced came running home from school, sobbing his eyes out, and our youngest, Ghastly Spotty Horrible Vicious Little is just at the age when taunts like 'she's a git' really hurt. Yes. + +00:02:08.000 --> 00:02:12.000 +[action] Mrs Git gobs colourfully into her handbag. + +00:02:12.000 --> 00:02:15.000 + +Do … do you live round here? + +00:02:15.000 --> 00:02:22.000 + +Yes, we live up the road, number 49 - you can't miss it. We've just had the outside painted with warm pus. + +00:02:22.000 --> 00:02:24.000 + +[with increasing embarrassment] Oh. + +00:02:24.000 --> 00:02:30.000 + +Yes. It's very nice actually. It goes nicely with the vomit and catarrh we've got smeared all over the front door. + +00:02:30.000 --> 00:02:34.000 + +I think we ought to be going. We have two children to collect. + +00:02:34.000 --> 00:02:38.000 + +Oh, well, bring them round for tea tomorrow. + +00:02:38.000 --> 00:02:40.000 + +Well… + +00:02:40.000 --> 00:02:50.000 + +It's Ghastly Spotty Cross-Eyed's birthday and she's having a disembowelling party for a few friends. The Nauseas will be there, and Doug and Janice Mucus, and the Rectums from Swanage. + +00:02:50.000 --> 00:02:56.000 +[caption] AND NOW A NICE VERSION OF THAT SAME SKETCH + +00:02:56.000 --> 00:03:02.000 + +John! Allow me to introduce our next-door neighhour. John, this is Mr Watson. + +00:03:02.000 --> 00:03:08.000 + +Hello. I noticed a slight look of anxiety cross your face just then but you needn't worry. + +00:03:08.000 --> 00:03:12.000 +[action] Cut to nun. + +00:03:12.000 --> 00:03:15.000 + +I preferred the dirty version. + +00:03:15.000 --> 00:03:20.000 +[action] Boxer knocks out the nun. Women's Institute applause film. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_21_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/8_Mosquito_hunters.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_21_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/8_Mosquito_hunters.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..7ce2368d --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_21_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/8_Mosquito_hunters.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,65 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated placeholder timings. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Big close-up Hank Spim walking; camera hand-held. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:12.000 + +Well, I've been a hunter all my life. I love animals. That's why I like to kill 'em. I wouldn't kill an animal I didn't like. Goodday Roy. + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:20.000 +[action] Reveal rough country location; small trailer labeled 'high explosives' with bombs. Hank takes a bazooka. + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:28.000 + +Hank and Roy Spim are tough, fearless backwoodsmen who have chosen to live in a violent, unrelenting world of nature's creatures, where only the fittest survive. Today they are off to hunt mosquitoes. + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:36.000 +[action] Big close-up Roy Spim; searching. + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:48.000 + +[voice over] The mosquito's a clever little bastard. You can track him for days and days until you really get to know him like a friend. He knows you're there, and you know he's there. It's a game of wits. You hate him, then you respect him, then you kill him. + +00:00:48.000 --> 00:00:53.000 +[action] Hank peers toward horizon; suddenly points. + +00:00:53.000 --> 00:00:56.000 + +Suddenly Hank spots the mosquito they're after. + +00:00:56.000 --> 00:01:06.000 +[action] Dramatic music. Crash zoom to patch in ordinary field. Hank and Roy crawl towards bushes. + +00:01:06.000 --> 00:01:22.000 + +Now more than ever, they must rely on the skills they have learnt from a lifetime's hunting. [music: tense] Hank gauges the wind. [action: Hank does complicated wind gauging] Roy examines the mosquito's spoor. [action: Roy examining ground] Then … [action: Roy fires bazooka; Hank fires machine gun; almighty explosions; smoke clears] It's a success. The mosquito now is dead. [action: Approach scorched patch] But Roy must make sure. [action: Roy points machine gun and fires more rounds] + +00:01:22.000 --> 00:01:26.000 + +There's nothing more dangerous than a wounded mosquito. + +00:01:26.000 --> 00:01:46.000 + +But the hunt is not over. With well practised skill Hank skins the mosquito. [action: enormous curved knife skins tiny mosquito] The wings of a fully grown male mosquito can in fact fetch anything up to point eight of a penny on the open market. [action: walking, carrying weapons] The long day is over and it's back to base camp for a night's rest. [action: inside villa; Hank cleaning bazooka] Here, surrounded by their trophies Roy and Hank prepare for a much tougher ordeal - a moth hunt. + +00:01:46.000 --> 00:01:54.000 + +Well, I follow the moth in the helicopter to lure it away from the flowers, and then Roy comes along in the Lockheed Starfighter and attacks it with air-to-air missiles. + +00:01:54.000 --> 00:01:59.000 + +A lot of people have asked us why we don't use fly spray. Well, where's the sport in that? + +00:01:59.000 --> 00:02:06.000 +[action] Driving in Land Rover heavily loaded with weapons. + +00:02:06.000 --> 00:02:24.000 + +For Roy, sport is everything. Ever since he lost his left arm battling with an ant, Roy has risked his life in the pursuit of tiny creatures. [action: peaceful river bank; fishing] But it's not all work and for relaxation they like nothing more than a day's fishing. [action: Hank presses a button; tremendous explosion in water] Wherever there is a challenge, Hank and Roy Spim will be there ready to carry on this primordial struggle between man and inoffensive, tiny insects. + +00:02:24.000 --> 00:02:30.000 +[action] Pull out: brothers standing on a tank. Heroic music reaches a climax. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_21_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/9_Poofy_judges.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_21_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/9_Poofy_judges.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..cd76a385 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_21_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/9_Poofy_judges.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,55 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated placeholder timings. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Oak-panelled robing chamber in the Old Bailey. Two Judges in full wigs and red robes enter. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:12.000 + +[very camp] Oh, I've had such a morning in the High Court. I could stamp my little feet the way those QC's carry on. + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:15.000 + +[just as camp] Don't I know it, love. + +00:00:15.000 --> 00:00:26.000 + +Objection here, objection there! And that nice policeman giving his evidence so well - beautiful speaking voice … well after a bit all I could do was bang my little gavel. + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:28.000 + +You what, love? + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:38.000 + +I banged me gavel. I did me 'silence in court' bit. Ooh! If looks could kill that prosecuting counsel would be in for thirty years. How did your summing up go? + +00:00:38.000 --> 00:00:48.000 + +Well, I was quite pleased actually. I was trying to do my butch voice, you know, 'what the jury must understand', and they loved it, you know. I could see that foreman eyeing me. + +00:00:48.000 --> 00:00:50.000 + +Really? + +00:00:50.000 --> 00:00:52.000 + +Yes, cheeky devil. + +00:00:52.000 --> 00:00:56.000 + +Was he that tall man with that very big… ? + +00:00:56.000 --> 00:01:16.000 + +No, just a minute - I must finish you know. Anyway, I finished up with 'the actions of these vicious men is a violent stain on the community and the full penalty of the law is scarcely sufficient to deal with their ghastly crimes', and I waggled my wig! Just ever so slightly, but it was a stunning effect. + +00:01:16.000 --> 00:01:20.000 + +Oh, I bet it was… like that super time I wore that striped robe in the Magistrates Court. + +00:01:20.000 --> 00:01:22.000 + +Oh, aye. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_22_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/0_head_tail.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_22_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/0_head_tail.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..c9328868 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_22_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/0_head_tail.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,34 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated placeholder timings for intro and credits. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:03.000 +[action] The camera tracks past five gorgeous lovelies in bikini, all in send-up provocative pin-up poses. + +00:00:03.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] The sixth in the pan is the announcer at his desk also posing in a bikini (with bikini top). + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:08.500 + +And now for something completely different. + +00:00:08.500 --> 00:00:10.500 +[action] Cut to 'It's' man, also in bikini. + +00:00:10.500 --> 00:00:12.000 + +It's… + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:16.000 +[action] Cut to credit titles as normal, except that the last shot is the little chicken man who drags across a banner reading 'How to recognize different parts of the body'. + +00:28:00.000 --> 00:28:03.000 +[action] Credits over. Zatapathique finishes and bends over exhausted. An arrow indicates his rear. + +00:28:03.000 --> 00:28:05.000 + +Number thirty-one. The end. + +00:28:05.000 --> 00:28:07.000 +[caption] THE END + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_22_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/10_The_death_of_Mary_Queen_of_Scots_(radio).vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_22_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/10_The_death_of_Mary_Queen_of_Scots_(radio).vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..47d7389d --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_22_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/10_The_death_of_Mary_Queen_of_Scots_(radio).vtt @@ -0,0 +1,53 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated placeholder timings. Skit begins at anchor #10. + +00:09:30.000 --> 00:09:35.000 +[action] Arrow indicates radio tuning dial. Pull back: two women listen. Announcer continues from radio. + +00:09:35.000 --> 00:09:41.000 + +…and that concludes the week's episode of 'How to Recognize Different Parts of the Body', adapted for radio by Ann Haydon-Jones and her husband, Pip. And now we present the first episode of a new radio drama series, 'The Death of Mary, Queen of Scots.' Part One: The Beginning. + +00:09:41.000 --> 00:09:43.000 +[caption] Theme: 'Coronation Scot' plays. + +00:09:43.000 --> 00:09:44.500 + +You are Mary, Queen of Scots? + +00:09:44.500 --> 00:09:45.500 + +I am! + +00:09:45.500 --> 00:09:51.000 +[action] Series of violent noises: thumps, bangs, slaps, drilling, sawing, flogging, shooting; Mary's screams. Women listen calmly. + +00:09:51.000 --> 00:09:53.000 +[caption] 'Coronation Scot' rises to denote end of episode. + +00:09:53.000 --> 00:09:55.500 + +Episode two of 'The Death of Mary, Queen of Scots', can be heard on Radio 4 almost immediately. + +00:09:55.500 --> 00:09:59.000 +[action] One woman switches radio over. Theme fades; violence and screaming resume. + +00:09:59.000 --> 00:10:00.500 + +I think she's dead. + +00:10:00.500 --> 00:10:01.500 + +No I'm not! + +00:10:01.500 --> 00:10:04.500 +[action] Violence and screaming continue; fade under 'Coronation Scot'. + +00:10:04.500 --> 00:10:09.000 + +That was episode two of 'The Death of Mary, Queen of Scots', adapted for radio by Bernard Hollowood and Brian London. And now, Radio Four will explode. + +00:10:09.000 --> 00:10:10.000 +[action] The radio explodes. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_22_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/11_Exploding_penguin_on_TV_set.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_22_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/11_Exploding_penguin_on_TV_set.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..2adf2b00 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_22_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/11_Exploding_penguin_on_TV_set.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,200 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated placeholder timings. Skit begins at anchor #11. + +00:10:10.000 --> 00:10:12.000 + +We'll have to watch the telly then. + +00:10:12.000 --> 00:10:13.000 + +Yes + +00:10:13.000 --> 00:10:15.000 +[action] Pepperpots swivel to TV set in corner. + +00:10:15.000 --> 00:10:17.000 + +What's that on the tellevision then? + +00:10:17.000 --> 00:10:18.000 + +Looks like a penguin. + +00:10:18.000 --> 00:10:20.000 +[action] On the TV sits a penguin, stuffed-looking; blank screen otherwise. + +00:10:20.000 --> 00:10:23.000 + +No, no, no, I didn't mean what's on the television set, I meant what programme. + +00:10:23.000 --> 00:10:24.000 + +Oh. + +00:10:24.000 --> 00:10:26.500 +[action] Second Pepperpot switches TV on and returns to seat. Set warms slowly. + +00:10:26.500 --> 00:10:28.500 + +It's funny that penguin being there innit? What's it doing there? + +00:10:28.500 --> 00:10:29.500 + +Standing. + +00:10:29.500 --> 00:10:31.000 + +I can see that! + +00:10:31.000 --> 00:10:34.000 + +If it lays an egg, it will fall down the back of the television set. + +00:10:34.000 --> 00:10:36.000 + +We'll have to watch that. Unless it's a male. + +00:10:36.000 --> 00:10:37.500 + +Ooh, I never thought of that. + +00:10:37.500 --> 00:10:39.000 + +Yes, looks fairly butch. + +00:10:39.000 --> 00:10:41.000 + +Per'aps it's from next door. + +00:10:41.000 --> 00:10:43.000 + +Penguins don't come from next door, they come from the Antarctic. + +00:10:43.000 --> 00:10:44.000 + +Burma. + +00:10:44.000 --> 00:10:45.500 + +Why did say Burma? + +00:10:45.500 --> 00:10:47.000 + +I panicked. + +00:10:47.000 --> 00:10:49.000 + +Oh. Perhaps it's from the zoo. + +00:10:49.000 --> 00:10:50.000 + +Which zoo? + +00:10:50.000 --> 00:10:52.500 + +How should I know which zoo? I'm not Doctor bloody Bernowski. + +00:10:52.500 --> 00:10:54.500 + +How does Doctor Bernowski know which zoo it came from? + +00:10:54.500 --> 00:10:56.000 + +He knows everything. + +00:10:56.000 --> 00:10:59.500 + +Oooh, I wouldn't like that, that'd take all the mystery out of life. Anyway, if it came from the zoo, it would have 'property of the zoo' stamped on it. + +00:10:59.500 --> 00:11:02.000 + +No it wouldn't. They don't stamp animals 'property of the zoo'. You can't stamp a huge lion. + +00:11:02.000 --> 00:11:03.500 + +They stamp them when they're small. + +00:11:03.500 --> 00:11:05.000 + +What happens when they moult? + +00:11:05.000 --> 00:11:06.000 + +Lions don't moult. + +00:11:06.000 --> 00:11:08.000 + +No, but penguins do. There, I've run rings around you logically. + +00:11:08.000 --> 00:11:09.500 + +Oh, intercourse the penguin. + +00:11:09.500 --> 00:11:11.500 +[action] TV screen now shows an announcer. + +00:11:11.500 --> 00:11:14.000 + +It's just gone 8 o'clock and time for the penguin on top of your television set to explode. + +00:11:14.000 --> 00:11:15.500 +[action] The penguin on top of the set explodes. + +00:11:15.500 --> 00:11:17.000 + +How did he know that was going to happen?! + +00:11:17.000 --> 00:11:18.500 + +It was an inspired guess. And now… + +00:11:18.500 --> 00:11:20.000 +[action] Cut to picture of a shin. + +00:11:20.000 --> 00:11:21.500 + +Number twenty-three. The shin. + +00:11:21.500 --> 00:11:23.500 +[action] Cut to Reginald Maulding. + +00:11:23.500 --> 00:11:25.000 + +Number twenty-four. Reginald's Maulding's shin + +00:11:25.000 --> 00:11:27.000 +[action] Gilliam-type open-head picture, with arrow. + +00:11:27.000 --> 00:11:28.500 + +Number twenty-five. The brain. + +00:11:28.500 --> 00:11:30.500 +[action] Picture of Margaret Thatcher. Arrow points to her knee. + +00:11:30.500 --> 00:11:32.000 + +Number twenty-six. Magaret Thatcher's brain. + +00:11:32.000 --> 00:11:35.000 +[action] Still picture of cricket match; all in polka-dotted Bermuda shorts. Arrows to each shorts. + +00:11:35.000 --> 00:11:36.500 + +Number twenty-seven. More naughty bits. + +00:11:36.500 --> 00:11:38.500 +[action] Picture of the cabinet at a table. Arrows point below the table to their naughty bits. + +00:11:38.500 --> 00:11:40.500 + +Number twenty-eight. The naughty bits of the cabinet. + +00:11:40.500 --> 00:11:42.500 +[action] Studio shot of next set: interior of country house. Arrow. + +00:11:42.500 --> 00:11:44.500 + +Number twenty-nine. The interior of a country house. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_22_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/12_There's_been_a_murder.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_22_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/12_There's_been_a_murder.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..61f7ec7a --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_22_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/12_There's_been_a_murder.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,164 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated placeholder timings. Skit begins at anchor #12. + +00:11:44.500 --> 00:11:46.500 +[action] Room with doctor, mother, and son. + +00:11:46.500 --> 00:11:48.000 + +That's not a part of the body. + +00:11:48.000 --> 00:11:49.500 + +No, it's a link though. + +00:11:49.500 --> 00:11:51.000 + +I didn't think it was very good. + +00:11:51.000 --> 00:11:53.000 + +No, it's the end of the series, they must be running out of ideas. + +00:11:53.000 --> 00:11:55.000 +[action] Inspector Muffin the Mule bursts through the door. + +00:11:55.000 --> 00:11:57.000 + +All right, don't anybody move, there's been a murder. + +00:11:57.000 --> 00:11:58.500 + +A murder? + +00:11:58.500 --> 00:12:01.000 + +No… no … not a murder… no what's like a murder but begins with B? + +00:12:01.000 --> 00:12:02.000 + +Birmingham. + +00:12:02.000 --> 00:12:03.500 + +No … no … no … no … no… + +00:12:03.500 --> 00:12:04.500 + +Burnley? + +00:12:04.500 --> 00:12:06.000 + +Burnley - that's right! Burnley in Lancashire. There's been a Burnley. + +00:12:06.000 --> 00:12:07.000 + +Burglary. + +00:12:07.000 --> 00:12:09.000 + +Burglary. Yes, good man. Burglary - that's it, of course. There's been a burglary. + +00:12:09.000 --> 00:12:10.000 + +Where? + +00:12:10.000 --> 00:12:11.500 + +In the back, just below the rib. + +00:12:11.500 --> 00:12:12.500 + +No - that's murder. + +00:12:12.500 --> 00:12:15.000 + +Oh… er no… in the band… In the bat… Barclays bat. + +00:12:15.000 --> 00:12:16.500 + +Barclays Bank? + +00:12:16.500 --> 00:12:18.500 + +Yes. Nasty business - got away with £23,000. + +00:12:18.500 --> 00:12:20.000 + +Any clues? + +00:12:20.000 --> 00:12:21.000 + +Any what? + +00:12:21.000 --> 00:12:22.500 + +Any evidence as to who did it? + +00:12:22.500 --> 00:12:26.000 + +[sarcasm] Any clues, eh? Oh, we don't half talk posh, don't we? I suppose you say 'ehnvelope' and 'larngerie' and 'sarndwiches on the settee'! Well this is a murder investigation, young man, and murder is a very serious business. + +00:12:26.000 --> 00:12:27.500 + +I thought you said it was a burglary. + +00:12:27.500 --> 00:12:33.000 + +Burglary is almost as serious a business as murder. Some burglaries are more serious than murder. A burglary in which someone gets stabbled is murder! So don't come these petty distinctions with me. You're as bad as a judge. Right, now! The first thing to do in the event of a breach of the peace of any kind, is to… go… [action] pause … oh, sorry, sorry, I was miles away. + +00:12:33.000 --> 00:12:34.500 + +Ring the police? + +00:12:34.500 --> 00:12:37.000 + +Ring the police. Yes, that's a good idea. Get them over here fast … no, on second thoughts, get them over here slowly, so they don't drop anything. + +00:12:37.000 --> 00:12:38.500 + +Shall I make us all a cup of tea? + +00:12:38.500 --> 00:12:40.000 + +Make what you like, Boskovitch - it won't help you in court. + +00:12:40.000 --> 00:12:41.500 + +I beg your pardon? + +00:12:41.500 --> 00:12:45.000 + +I'm sorry, sorry. That's the trouble with being on two cases at once. I keep thinking I've got Boskovitch cornered and in fact I'm investigating a Burnley. + +00:12:45.000 --> 00:12:46.000 + +Burglary. + +00:12:46.000 --> 00:12:47.500 + +Burglary! Yes - good man. + +00:12:47.500 --> 00:12:49.000 +[action] Police siren and cars arrive outside. + +00:12:49.000 --> 00:12:50.500 + +Who's Boskovitch? + +00:12:50.500 --> 00:12:52.500 + +Hah! Boskovitch is a Russian scientist who is passing information to the Russians. + +00:12:52.500 --> 00:12:53.500 + +Classified information? + +00:12:53.500 --> 00:12:56.000 + +Oh, there he goes again! 'Classified information'! Oh, sitting on the 'settee' with our 'scones' and our 'classified information'! + +00:12:56.000 --> 00:12:58.000 +[action] Door opens; a plainclothes detective plus ten PCs (the Fred Tomlinson Singers) enter. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_22_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/13_Europolice_Song_Contest.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_22_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/13_Europolice_Song_Contest.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..452b96b8 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_22_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/13_Europolice_Song_Contest.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,70 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated placeholder timings. Skit begins at anchor #13. + +00:12:58.000 --> 00:12:59.500 + +Ah! Hello, Duckie. + +00:12:59.500 --> 00:13:01.000 + +Hello, sir. How are you? + +00:13:01.000 --> 00:13:02.500 + +I'm fine thanks. How are you? + +00:13:02.500 --> 00:13:04.000 + +Well, sir, I'm a little bit moody today, sir. + +00:13:04.000 --> 00:13:05.500 + +Why's that, Duckie? + +00:13:05.500 --> 00:13:07.000 + +Because… + +00:13:07.000 --> 00:13:09.000 +[action] Rhythm combo starts offscreen. Superimposed caption: 'SGT DUCKIE'S SONG'. + +00:13:09.000 --> 00:13:14.000 + +I'm a little bit sad and lonely +Now my baby's gone away… +I'm feeling kinda blue +Don't know just what to do +I feel a little sad today. + +00:13:14.000 --> 00:13:18.000 + +He's a little bit sad and lonely +Now his baby's gone away +He's feeling kinda blue +He don't know just what to do +He's not feeling so good today. + +00:13:18.000 --> 00:13:21.000 + +[solo] When I smile +The sun comes flooding in +But when I'm sad +It goes behind the clouds again. + +00:13:21.000 --> 00:13:24.000 +He's a little bit sad and lonely +Now his baby's gone away +He's feeling kinda [caption] etcetera, etcetera. [caption] applause + +00:13:24.000 --> 00:13:25.500 + +A lovely song, Duckie. + +00:13:25.500 --> 00:13:28.500 +[action] Eurovision girl enters. + +00:13:28.500 --> 00:13:34.000 + +And that's the final entry. La dernière entrée. Das final entry. And now, guten abend. Das scores. The scores. Les scores. Dei scores. Oh! Scores. Ha! Scores! [action] cut to scoreboard in Chinese Yes, Monaco is the winner - hall Monaco is the linner- oh yes, man, Monaco's won de big prize, bwana … and now, here is Chief Inspector Jean-Paul Zatapathique with the winning song once again. + diff --git "a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_22_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/14_\342\200\230Bing_Tiddle_Tiddle_Bong\342\200\231_(song).vtt" "b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_22_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/14_\342\200\230Bing_Tiddle_Tiddle_Bong\342\200\231_(song).vtt" new file mode 100644 index 00000000..8c9c3159 --- /dev/null +++ "b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_22_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/14_\342\200\230Bing_Tiddle_Tiddle_Bong\342\200\231_(song).vtt" @@ -0,0 +1,22 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated placeholder timings. Skit begins at anchor #14. + +00:13:34.000 --> 00:13:37.000 +[action] Accompaniment starts; singers hum the intro. Cut to flashy Eurovision set. Zatapathique steps onto podium. + +00:13:37.000 --> 00:13:40.000 + +[hushed] And so, Inspector Zatapathique, the forensic expert from the Monaco Murder Squad sings his song 'Bing Tiddle Tiddle Bong'. + +00:13:40.000 --> 00:13:43.000 + +[spoken] Quoi? Quoi? Tout le monde, quoi? … mais, le monde … d'habitude … mais … je pense … + +00:13:43.000 --> 00:13:47.000 + +Bing tiddle tiddle bang +Bing tiddle fiddle bing +Bing fiddle fiddle tiddle tiddle +Bing fiddle tiddle tiddle BONG! + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_22_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/1_How_to_recognize_different_parts_of_the_body.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_22_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/1_How_to_recognize_different_parts_of_the_body.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..958cacf7 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_22_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/1_How_to_recognize_different_parts_of_the_body.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,67 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated placeholder timings. Skit begins at anchor #1. + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:18.500 + +How to recognize different parts of the body. + +00:00:18.500 --> 00:00:22.000 +[action] Hold long enough to read this new title before the foot comes down. + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:24.500 + +Number one. The foot. + +00:00:24.500 --> 00:00:27.500 +[action] A little arrow points to the foot simultaneously. + +00:00:27.500 --> 00:00:29.500 +[action] Cut to picture of Venus de Milo (top half). Arrow points to shoulder. + +00:00:29.500 --> 00:00:31.500 + +Number two. The shoulder. + +00:00:31.500 --> 00:00:34.500 +[action] Cut to picture of a foot cut off at the ankle. Cigarettes are parked in the top. Arrow. + +00:00:34.500 --> 00:00:36.500 + +And number three. The other foot. + +00:00:36.500 --> 00:00:39.000 +[action] Cut to profile picture of strange person (Gilliam art). Arrow to bridge of nose. + +00:00:39.000 --> 00:00:41.000 + +Number four. The bridge of the nose. + +00:00:41.000 --> 00:00:43.500 +[action] Picture of man in polka-dotted Bermuda shorts. Arrow to shorts. + +00:00:43.500 --> 00:00:45.500 + +Number five. The naughty bits. + +00:00:45.500 --> 00:00:47.500 +[action] Picture of crooked elbow. Arrow pointing just above the elbow. + +00:00:47.500 --> 00:00:49.500 + +Number six. Just above the elbow. + +00:00:49.500 --> 00:00:52.000 +[action] Closer picture, identical Bermuda shorts. Arrow to top of groin. + +00:00:52.000 --> 00:00:55.000 + +Number seven. Two inches to the right of a very naughty bit indeed. + +00:00:55.000 --> 00:00:57.000 +[action] Close-up of a real knee. Arrow to knee. + +00:00:57.000 --> 00:00:59.000 + +Number eight. The kneecap. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_22_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/2_Bruces.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_22_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/2_Bruces.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..81c50e57 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_22_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/2_Bruces.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,212 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated placeholder timings. Skit begins at anchor #2. + +00:01:00.000 --> 00:01:04.000 +[action] Pull back to reveal the knee belongs to First Bruce, an Australian in full outback gear. Room with fan and old fridge. Brief 'Waltzing Matilda'. + +00:01:04.000 --> 00:01:06.000 + +Goodday, Bruce! + +00:01:06.000 --> 00:01:08.000 + +Oh, Hello Bruce! + +00:01:08.000 --> 00:01:10.000 + +How are yer Bruce? + +00:01:10.000 --> 00:01:12.000 + +Bit crook, Bruce. + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:14.000 + +Where's Bruce? + +00:01:14.000 --> 00:01:16.000 + +He's not here, Bruce. + +00:01:16.000 --> 00:01:18.000 + +Blimey, s'hot in here, Bruce. + +00:01:18.000 --> 00:01:21.500 + +S'hot enough to boil a monkey's bum! + +00:01:21.500 --> 00:01:23.500 + +That's a strange expression, Bruce. + +00:01:23.500 --> 00:01:29.000 + +Well Bruce, I heard the Prime Minister use it. S'hot enough to boil a monkey's bum in 'ere, your Majesty,' he said and she smiled quietly to herself. + +00:01:29.000 --> 00:01:31.500 + +She's a good Sheila, Bruce and not at all stuck up. + +00:01:31.500 --> 00:01:34.000 + +Ah, here comes the Bossfella now! - how are you, Bruce? + +00:01:34.000 --> 00:01:36.000 +[action] Enter Fourth Bruce with English person, Michael. + +00:01:36.000 --> 00:01:42.000 + +Goodday, Bruce, Hello Bruce, how are you, Bruce? Gentlemen, I'd like to introduce a chap from pommie land… who'll be joining us this year here in the Philosophy Department of the University of Woolamaloo. + +00:01:42.000 --> 00:01:43.500 +[caption] Goodday. + +00:01:43.500 --> 00:01:47.500 + +Michael Baldwin - this is Bruce. Michael Baldwin - this is Bruce. Michael Baldwin - this is Bruce. + +00:01:47.500 --> 00:01:49.500 + +Is your name not Bruce, then? + +00:01:49.500 --> 00:01:51.000 + +No, it's Michael. + +00:01:51.000 --> 00:01:53.000 + +That's going to cause a little confusion. + +00:01:53.000 --> 00:01:55.000 + +Mind if we call you 'Bruce' to keep it clear? + +00:01:55.000 --> 00:02:00.000 + +Well, Gentlemen, I think we'd better start the meeting. Before we start, though, I'll ask the padre for a prayer. + +00:02:00.000 --> 00:02:02.500 +[action] First Bruce snaps a plastic dog-collar round his neck. They all lower their heads. + +00:02:02.500 --> 00:02:05.500 + +Oh Lord, we beseech thee, have mercy on our faculty, Amen!! + +00:02:05.500 --> 00:02:07.000 +[caption] Amen! + +00:02:07.000 --> 00:02:11.000 + +Crack the tubes, right! [action] Third Bruce starts opening beer cans. Er, Bruce, I now call upon you to welcome Mr. Baldwin to the Philosophy Department. + +00:02:11.000 --> 00:02:15.000 + +I'd like to welcome the pommy bastard to God's own earth, and I'd like to remind him that we don't like stuck-up sticky-beaks here. + +00:02:15.000 --> 00:02:17.000 +[caption] Hear, hear! Well spoken, Bruce! + +00:02:17.000 --> 00:02:22.000 + +Now, Bruce teaches classical philosophy, Bruce teaches Haegelian philosophy, and Bruce here teaches logical positivism, and is also in charge of the sheepdip. + +00:02:22.000 --> 00:02:24.000 + +What's does new Bruce teach? + +00:02:24.000 --> 00:02:29.000 + +New Bruce will be teaching political science - Machiavelli, Bentham, Locke, Hobbes, Sutcliffe, Bradman, Lindwall, Miller, Hassett, and Benet. + +00:02:29.000 --> 00:02:31.000 + +Those are cricketers, Bruce! + +00:02:31.000 --> 00:02:32.500 + +Oh, spit! + +00:02:32.500 --> 00:02:34.500 + +Howls of derisive laughter, Bruce! + +00:02:34.500 --> 00:02:40.000 + +In addition, as he's going to be teaching politics, I've told him he's welcome to teach any of the great socialist thinkers, provided he makes it clear that they were [caption] wrong. + +00:02:40.000 --> 00:02:42.000 +[action] They all stand up. + +00:02:42.000 --> 00:02:46.000 +[caption] Australia, Australia, Australia, Australia, we love you. Amen! + +00:02:46.000 --> 00:02:47.500 +[action] They sit down. + +00:02:47.500 --> 00:02:49.000 + +Any questions? + +00:02:49.000 --> 00:02:51.000 + +New Bruce - are you a pooftah? + +00:02:51.000 --> 00:02:52.500 + +Are you a pooftah? + +00:02:52.500 --> 00:02:53.500 + +No! + +00:02:53.500 --> 00:03:05.000 + +No right, well gentlemen, I'll just remind you of the faculty rules: Rule one - no pooftahs. Rule two, no member of the faculty is to maltreat the Abbos in any way whatsoever - if there's anybody watching. Rule three - no pooftahs. Rule four - I don't want to catch anyone not drinking in their room after lights out. Rule five - no pooftahs. Rule six - there is no rule six! Rule seven - no pooftahs. That concludes the reading of the rules, Bruce. + +00:03:05.000 --> 00:03:08.000 + +This here's the wattle - the emblem of our land. You can stick it in a bottle or you can hold it in your hand. + +00:03:08.000 --> 00:03:09.500 +[caption] Amen! + +00:03:09.500 --> 00:03:15.000 + +Gentlemen, at six o'clock I want every man-Bruce of you in the Sydney Harbour Bridge room to take a glass of sherry with the flying philosopher, Bruce, and I call upon you, padre, to close the meeting with a prayer. + +00:03:15.000 --> 00:03:17.500 + +Oh Lord, we beseech thee etc. etc. etc., Amen. + +00:03:17.500 --> 00:03:19.000 +[caption] Amen! + +00:03:19.000 --> 00:03:21.000 + +Right, let's get some Sheilas. + +00:03:21.000 --> 00:03:24.000 +[action] An Aborigine servant bursts in with an enormous tray full of enormous steaks. + +00:03:24.000 --> 00:03:25.000 + +OK. + +00:03:25.000 --> 00:03:26.500 + +Ah, elevenses. + +00:03:26.500 --> 00:03:28.500 + +This should tide us over 'til lunchtime. + +00:03:28.500 --> 00:03:30.000 + +Reckon so, Bruce. + +00:03:30.000 --> 00:03:33.000 + +Sydney Nolan! What's that! [action] points + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_22_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/3_Naughty_bits_(continuation_of_body_parts).vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_22_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/3_Naughty_bits_(continuation_of_body_parts).vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..e4de5173 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_22_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/3_Naughty_bits_(continuation_of_body_parts).vtt @@ -0,0 +1,60 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated placeholder timings. Skit begins at anchor #3. + +00:03:33.000 --> 00:03:35.000 +[action] Dramatic close-up of Fourth Bruce's ear. Arrow pointing. + +00:03:35.000 --> 00:03:37.000 + +Number nine. The ear. + +00:03:37.000 --> 00:03:39.000 +[action] Picture of big toe. Arrow. + +00:03:39.000 --> 00:03:41.000 + +Number ten. The big toe. + +00:03:41.000 --> 00:03:43.000 +[action] Picture of another man in Bermuda shorts. Arrow to shorts. + +00:03:43.000 --> 00:03:45.000 + +Number eleven. More naughty bits. + +00:03:45.000 --> 00:03:47.500 +[action] Full length shot of lady in Bermuda shorts and Bermuda bra. Arrows to bra and shorts. + +00:03:47.500 --> 00:03:49.500 + +Number twelve. The naughty bits of a lady, + +00:03:49.500 --> 00:03:51.500 +[action] Picture of a horse wearing Bermuda shorts. Arrow. + +00:03:51.500 --> 00:03:53.500 + +Number thirteen. The naughty bits of a horse, + +00:03:53.500 --> 00:03:55.500 +[action] Picture of an ant, very tiny in corner. Enormous arrow. + +00:03:55.500 --> 00:03:57.500 + +Number fourteen. The naughty bits of an ant. + +00:03:57.500 --> 00:04:00.000 +[action] Picture of Reginald Maudling with Bermuda shorts over suit. Arrow to shorts. + +00:04:00.000 --> 00:04:02.000 + +Number fifteen. The naughty bits of Reginald Maudling. + +00:04:02.000 --> 00:04:04.000 +[action] Close-up of false hand sticking out of a sleeve. Arrow. + +00:04:04.000 --> 00:04:06.000 + +Number sixteen. The hand. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_22_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/4_The_man_who_contradicts_people.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_22_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/4_The_man_who_contradicts_people.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..6ce0fe9e --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_22_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/4_The_man_who_contradicts_people.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,84 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated placeholder timings. Skit begins at anchor #4. + +00:04:06.000 --> 00:04:09.000 +[action] Pull back: standard interviewer and interviewee in two-shot. Interviewer removes false hand, revealing hook. + +00:04:09.000 --> 00:04:16.000 + +Good evening. I have with me in the studio tonight Mr Norman St. John Polevaulter, who for the last few years has been contradicting people…Mr Polevaulter, why do you contradict people? + +00:04:16.000 --> 00:04:17.500 + +I don't! + +00:04:17.500 --> 00:04:19.500 + +You told me that you did. + +00:04:19.500 --> 00:04:21.000 + +I most certainly did not! + +00:04:21.000 --> 00:04:22.000 + +Oh. I see. I'll start again. + +00:04:22.000 --> 00:04:23.000 + +No you won't! + +00:04:23.000 --> 00:04:26.000 + +Ssh! Mr Polevaulter I understand you don't contradict people. + +00:04:26.000 --> 00:04:27.000 + +Yes I do! + +00:04:27.000 --> 00:04:29.000 + +And when didn't you start contradicting people? + +00:04:29.000 --> 00:04:31.000 + +Well I did, in 1952. + +00:04:31.000 --> 00:04:32.000 + +1952? + +00:04:32.000 --> 00:04:33.000 + +1947. + +00:04:33.000 --> 00:04:34.500 + +Twenty-three years ago. + +00:04:34.500 --> 00:04:35.500 + +No! + +00:04:35.500 --> 00:04:38.000 +[action] Cut to announcer at desk in farmyard, fondly holding a small pig. + +00:04:38.000 --> 00:04:41.000 + +And so on and so on and so on. And now… + +00:04:41.000 --> 00:04:44.000 +[action] Picture of the Pope; pause; arrow points to top of head. + +00:04:44.000 --> 00:04:46.000 + +Number seventeen. The top of the head. + +00:04:46.000 --> 00:04:48.000 +[action] Indeterminate flesh with a feather sticking out. Arrow to feather. + +00:04:48.000 --> 00:04:50.000 + +Number eighteen…the feather, rare. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_22_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/5_Cosmetic_surgery_(Raymond_Luxury_Yacht).vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_22_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/5_Cosmetic_surgery_(Raymond_Luxury_Yacht).vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..0ecb4ff0 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_22_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/5_Cosmetic_surgery_(Raymond_Luxury_Yacht).vtt @@ -0,0 +1,115 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated placeholder timings. Skit begins at anchor #5. + +00:04:50.000 --> 00:04:52.000 +[action] Profile of Raymond Luxury Yacht with enormous false polystyrene nose. Arrow to nose. + +00:04:52.000 --> 00:04:54.000 + +Number nineteen. The nose. + +00:04:54.000 --> 00:04:58.000 +[action] Harley Street consulting room. Camera tracks along comically long nameplate of Professor Sir Adrian Furrows. Knock on door. + +00:04:58.000 --> 00:05:00.000 + +Come in. + +00:05:00.000 --> 00:05:04.000 +[action] Raymond Luxury Yacht enters; navigates hinged section of the long nameplate barrier. Nose a foot long. + +00:05:04.000 --> 00:05:06.000 + +Ah! Mr Luxury Yacht. Do sit down, please. + +00:05:06.000 --> 00:05:09.000 + +Ah, no, no. My name is spelt 'Luxury Yacht' but it's pronounced 'Throatwobbler Mangrove'. + +00:05:09.000 --> 00:05:11.000 + +Well, do sit down then Mr Throatwobbler Mangrove. + +00:05:11.000 --> 00:05:12.000 + +Thank you. + +00:05:12.000 --> 00:05:14.000 + +Now, what seems to be the trouble? + +00:05:14.000 --> 00:05:16.500 + +Um, I'd like you to perform some plastic surgery on me. + +00:05:16.500 --> 00:05:19.000 + +I see. And which particular feature of your anatomy is causing you distress? + +00:05:19.000 --> 00:05:24.000 + +Well, well for a long time now, in fact, even when I was a child … I … you know, whenever I left home to … catch a bus, or… to catch a train… and even my tennis has suffered actually… + +00:05:24.000 --> 00:05:26.000 + +Yes. To be absolutely blunt you're worried about your enormous hooter. + +00:05:26.000 --> 00:05:27.000 + +No! + +00:05:27.000 --> 00:05:28.000 + +No? + +00:05:28.000 --> 00:05:29.000 + +Yes. + +00:05:29.000 --> 00:05:31.000 + +Yes, and you want me to hack a bit off. + +00:05:31.000 --> 00:05:32.000 + +Please. + +00:05:32.000 --> 00:05:34.000 + +Fine. It is a startler, isn't it? Er, do you mind if I… er. + +00:05:34.000 --> 00:05:35.000 + +What? + +00:05:35.000 --> 00:05:39.000 +Oh, no nothing, then, well, I'll just examine your nose. [action] He examines; the nose comes off in his hand. + +00:05:39.000 --> 00:05:43.000 + +Mr Luxury Yacht, this nose of yours is false. It's made of polystyrene and your own hooter's a beaut. No pruning necessary. + +00:05:43.000 --> 00:05:44.500 + +I'd still like the operation. + +00:05:44.500 --> 00:05:46.000 + +Well, you've had the operation, you strange person. + +00:05:46.000 --> 00:05:47.500 + +Please do an operation. + +00:05:47.500 --> 00:05:50.000 + +Well, all right, all right, but only … if you come on a camping holiday with me. + +00:05:50.000 --> 00:05:52.000 + +He asked me! He asked me! + +00:05:52.000 --> 00:05:56.000 +[action] Lyrical slow-motion film of Luxury Yacht and specialist frolicking in the countryside. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_22_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/6_Camp_square-bashing.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_22_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/6_Camp_square-bashing.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..a9f20726 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_22_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/6_Camp_square-bashing.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,45 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated placeholder timings. Skit begins at anchor #6. + +00:05:56.000 --> 00:06:01.000 + +Next week we'll be showing you how to pick up an architect, how to pull a prime minister, and how to have fun with a wholesale poulterer. But now the men of the Derbyshire Light Infantry entertain us with a precision display of bad temper. + +00:06:01.000 --> 00:06:02.500 +[caption] Attention + +00:06:02.500 --> 00:06:06.500 +[action] Eight soldiers in two ranks of four. They halt, and chant with precision. + +00:06:06.500 --> 00:06:12.000 + +My goodness me, I am in a bad temper today all right, two, three, damn, damn, two, three, I am vexed and ratty. [action] shake fists Two, three, and hopping mad. [action] stamp feet + +00:06:12.000 --> 00:06:14.000 +[action] Cut to interviewer. + +00:06:14.000 --> 00:06:17.000 + +And next the men of the Second Armoured Division regale us with their famous close order swanning about. + +00:06:17.000 --> 00:06:19.000 +[action] Cut to sergeant with eight soldiers. + +00:06:19.000 --> 00:06:21.000 + +Squad. Camp it … up! + +00:06:21.000 --> 00:06:27.000 +[action] Soldiers mince in unison, delivering camp insults and banter. + +00:06:27.000 --> 00:06:29.000 +[action] Cut to interviewer. + +00:06:29.000 --> 00:06:31.000 + +And finally… + +00:06:31.000 --> 00:06:36.000 +[action] Animation: dancing generals, then the story of the killer cars. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_22_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/7_Cut-price_airline.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_22_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/7_Cut-price_airline.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..4370b385 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_22_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/7_Cut-price_airline.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,181 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated placeholder timings. Skit begins at anchor #7. + +00:06:36.000 --> 00:06:41.000 +[action] Air terminal signs: BEA, TWA, Air India, BOAC, the Verrifast Plaine Company Ltd. Pan to checking-in desk. Porter brings bags for Mr and Mrs Irrelevant, gets tip, swaps to pilot cap and moustache. Vicar with eye patch stands nearby. + +00:06:41.000 --> 00:06:43.000 + +Morning sir, can I help you? + +00:06:43.000 --> 00:06:45.000 + +Er, yes, we've booked on your flight for America. + +00:06:45.000 --> 00:06:49.000 + +Oh, we don't fly to America … [action] vicar nudges him Oh, the American flight… Er, on the plane … oh yes, oh we do that, all right. Safe as houses, no need for panic. + +00:06:49.000 --> 00:06:50.500 + +Is it really 37/6d? + +00:06:50.500 --> 00:06:52.000 + +Thirty bob. I'm robbing myself. + +00:06:52.000 --> 00:06:53.500 + +Thirty bob! + +00:06:53.500 --> 00:06:56.000 + +Twenty-five. Two quid the pair of yer. Er, that's without insurance. + +00:06:56.000 --> 00:06:58.000 + +Well, how much is it with insurance? + +00:06:58.000 --> 00:07:00.000 + +Hundred and two quid. That's including the flight. + +00:07:00.000 --> 00:07:02.000 + +Do we really need insurance? + +00:07:02.000 --> 00:07:04.000 + +No. [action] vicar nudges him Yes, essential. + +00:07:04.000 --> 00:07:06.500 + +Well, we'll have it with insurance please. + +00:07:06.500 --> 00:07:11.500 + +Right - do you want it with the body and one relative flown back, or you can have both bodies flown back and no relatives, or four relatives, no bodies, and the ashes sent by parcel post. + +00:07:11.500 --> 00:07:13.000 + +How long will it take? + +00:07:13.000 --> 00:07:14.500 + +Er, let me put it this way - no idea. + +00:07:14.500 --> 00:07:16.000 + +Six hours. + +00:07:16.000 --> 00:07:17.000 + +Six? + +00:07:17.000 --> 00:07:19.000 + +Five, ten for the pair of you. + +00:07:19.000 --> 00:07:20.500 + +Oh, is it a jet? + +00:07:20.500 --> 00:07:23.000 + +Well, no … It's not so much of a jet, it's more your, er, Triumph Herald engine with wings. + +00:07:23.000 --> 00:07:24.500 + +When are you taking off?. + +00:07:24.500 --> 00:07:26.000 + +3300 hours. + +00:07:26.000 --> 00:07:27.000 + +What? + +00:07:27.000 --> 00:07:28.000 + +2600 hours for the pair of you. + +00:07:28.000 --> 00:07:29.000 + +What? + +00:07:29.000 --> 00:07:31.000 + +Have the injections, you won't care. + +00:07:31.000 --> 00:07:32.500 + +What injections? + +00:07:32.500 --> 00:07:36.000 + +Barley sugar injections. Calm you down. They're compulsory - Board of Trade. Promise. [action] holds up crossed fingers + +00:07:36.000 --> 00:07:37.500 + +Oh, I don't like the sound of injections. + +00:07:37.500 --> 00:07:40.500 +[action] Making a ringing sound Brrp, brrp. [action] picks up phone Hello, yes right. [action] puts phone down You've got to make your mind up straight away if you're coming or not. + +00:07:40.500 --> 00:07:41.500 +[caption] Yes. + +00:07:41.500 --> 00:07:44.000 + +Right, you can't change your mind. I'll ring the departure lounge. [action] picks up phone Hello? Two more on their way, Mrs Turpin. + +00:07:44.000 --> 00:07:48.000 +[action] Cut to Mrs Turpin in suburban lounge with 'Intercontinental Arrivals' sign. Mr and Mrs Irrelevant arrive and sit. + +00:07:48.000 --> 00:07:55.000 + +Now, the duty-free trolley is over there … there's some lovely drop scones and there's duty-free broccoli and there's fresh eccles cakes. You're allowed two hundred each on the plane. [action] she picks up teacup and speaks into it The Verrifast Plane Company announce the departure of flight one to over the hills and far away. Will passengers for flight one, please assemble at gate one. Passengers are advised that there is still plenty of time to buy eccles cakes. + +00:07:55.000 --> 00:07:57.000 +[action] Man and vicar enter carrying a large wing. + +00:07:57.000 --> 00:07:58.500 + +Nearly ready. + +00:07:58.500 --> 00:08:00.500 +[action] They take the wing through. Hammering is heard. + +00:08:00.500 --> 00:08:03.000 +[action] speaking into cup All passengers please get ready for their barley sugar injections. + +00:08:03.000 --> 00:08:05.000 +[action] Japanese pilot enters. + +00:08:05.000 --> 00:08:08.000 + +Today we all take vow. Today we smash the enemy fleet… we smash, smash. + +00:08:08.000 --> 00:08:10.000 +[action] Man and vicar grab him and take him back. + +00:08:10.000 --> 00:08:13.000 + +That's Mr Kamikaze, the pilot, he's very nice really, but make sure he stays clear of battleships. + +00:08:13.000 --> 00:08:16.000 +[action] Cut to stock film of battleships steaming. Stirring music. + +00:08:16.000 --> 00:08:19.000 + +There have been many stirring tales told of the sea and also some fairly uninteresting ones only marginally connected with it, like this one. Sorry, this isn't a very good announcement. Sorry. + +00:08:19.000 --> 00:08:21.500 +[action] Cut to announcer by desk at the seaside. + +00:08:21.500 --> 00:08:25.000 + +And here is the result of the 'Where to put Edward Heath's statue Competition. The winner was a Mr Ivy North who wins ten guineas and a visit to the Sailors Quarters. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_22_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/8_Batley_Townswomen's_Guild_presents_the_first_heart_transplant.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_22_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/8_Batley_Townswomen's_Guild_presents_the_first_heart_transplant.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..f7fec4e6 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_22_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/8_Batley_Townswomen's_Guild_presents_the_first_heart_transplant.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,33 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated placeholder timings. Skit begins at anchor #8. + +00:08:25.000 --> 00:08:27.000 +[action] Quick clip of Battle of Pearl Harbor re-enactment. Cut back to announcer. + +00:08:27.000 --> 00:08:30.000 + +That was last year's re-enactment of the Battle of Pearl Harbor performed by the Batley Townswomen's Guild. It was written, directed and produced by Mrs Rita Fairbanks. + +00:08:30.000 --> 00:08:31.500 +[action] Cut to Rita Fairbanks on the beach. + +00:08:31.500 --> 00:08:32.500 + +Hello again. + +00:08:32.500 --> 00:08:34.500 + +And what are your ladies going to do for us this year? + +00:08:34.500 --> 00:08:42.000 + +Well, this year we decided to re-enact something with a more modern flavour. We had considered a version of Michael Stewart's speech on Nigeria and there were several votes on the Committee for a staging of Herr Willi Brandt's visit to East Germany, but we've settled instead for a dramatization of the first heart transplant. Incidentally my sister Madge will be playing the plucky little springbok pioneer Christian Barnard. + +00:08:42.000 --> 00:08:45.000 + +Well off we go, then with the Barley Townswomen's Guild re-enactment of the first heart transplant. + +00:08:45.000 --> 00:08:49.000 +[action] Rita blows whistle. Two groups of ladies rush, end up in the sea, splashing and thumping with handbags. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_22_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/9_The_first_underwater_production_of_'Measure_for_Measure'.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_22_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/9_The_first_underwater_production_of_'Measure_for_Measure'.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..38f42729 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_22_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/9_The_first_underwater_production_of_'Measure_for_Measure'.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,56 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated placeholder timings. Skit begins at anchor #9. + +00:08:49.000 --> 00:08:53.000 +[action] Announcer desk surrounded by sea. + +00:08:53.000 --> 00:08:58.000 + +The first heart transplant. But this is not the only open-air production here that has used the sea. Theatrical managers in this area have not been slow to appreciate the sea's tremendous dramatic value. And somewhere, out in this bay, is the first underwater production of 'Measure for Measure'. + +00:08:58.000 --> 00:09:02.000 +[action] Expanse of sea. Muffled watery Shakespearean verse dubbed. Zoom in; two actors leap up, take breath, go under again; dialogue continues muted. + +00:09:02.000 --> 00:09:03.500 + +Servant ho! + +00:09:03.500 --> 00:09:06.500 +[action] He goes underwater again. Servant in the boat steps into the water and goes under. + +00:09:06.500 --> 00:09:09.500 +[action] Announcer now up to his waist in sea. + +00:09:09.500 --> 00:09:12.500 + +The underwater version of 'Measure for Measure', and further out to sea 'Hello Dolly' is also doing good business. + +00:09:12.500 --> 00:09:15.500 +[action] Buoy with card 'Hello Dolly, Tonight 7.30'. Muffled watery snatch of Hello Dolly. Swing to patch of open sea. + +00:09:15.500 --> 00:09:18.000 + +… and over there on the oyster beds Formula 2 car racing. [action] underwater noises of Formula 2 cars + +00:09:18.000 --> 00:09:21.000 +[action] Animation: racing car moves over a naked lady, past sign 'Pit Stop'. Close up of armpits. Arrow. + +00:09:21.000 --> 00:09:22.500 + +Number twenty. The armpits. + +00:09:22.500 --> 00:09:24.500 +[action] Picture of a person. Arrow on the neck. + +00:09:24.500 --> 00:09:27.000 + +Number twenty-one. The bottom two-thirds of the nape of the neck. + +00:09:27.000 --> 00:09:28.500 +[action] Cut to radio. + +00:09:28.500 --> 00:09:30.000 + +Number twenty-two. The nipple. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_23/0_Episode23_head_tail.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_23/0_Episode23_head_tail.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..f4d5433b --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_23/0_Episode23_head_tail.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,19 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated placeholder timings. Includes intro link list and end credits. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:03.000 +[caption] Monty Python's Flying Circus: Just the Words - Episode 23 + +00:00:03.000 --> 00:00:08.000 +[caption] Skits: French subtitled film; Scott of the Antarctic; Scott of the Sahara; Fish Licence; Derby Council v. All Blacks rugby match; Long John Silver Impersonators v. Bournemouth Gynaecologist + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:11.000 +[action] Colour code shown for cast: John Cleese, Michael Palin, Eric Idle, Graham Chapman, Terry Jones, Terry Gilliam, Carol Cleveland + +00:06:00.000 --> 00:06:04.000 +[action] Montage of scenes of destruction, buildings falling down, bombs etc. + +00:06:04.000 --> 00:06:10.000 +[caption] Roll credits + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_23/1_French_subtitled_film.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_23/1_French_subtitled_film.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..77f164e4 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_23/1_French_subtitled_film.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,287 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated placeholder timings based on script order. Includes subtitles and stage directions. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Exterior large rubbish dump. Hand-held camera tracks to girl in simple white dress with very long red hair, sitting on a chair holding a cabbage. Stig enters uneasily. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:08.000 + +Bonjour. + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:10.000 +[caption] GOOD MORNING + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:12.000 + +Bonjour. + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:14.000 +[caption] GOOD MORNING + +00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:18.000 +[action] Pause. Stig looks uneasy, glancing at camera. + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:22.000 + +Il fait beau ce matin. + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:24.000 +[caption] IT'S A NICE DAY + +00:00:24.000 --> 00:00:26.000 + +Oui, oui. + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:28.000 +[caption] YES, YES + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:30.500 + +D'accord… + +00:00:30.500 --> 00:00:32.500 +[caption] HEAR HEAR + +00:00:32.500 --> 00:00:35.500 + +Venez-vous ici souvent? + +00:00:35.500 --> 00:00:38.000 +[caption] DO YOU COME HERE OFTEN? + +00:00:38.000 --> 00:00:40.000 + +Oui. + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:41.500 +[caption] YES + +00:00:41.500 --> 00:00:44.500 + +Ah. Bon. Bon. + +00:00:44.500 --> 00:00:46.500 +[caption] GOOD, GOOD + +00:00:46.500 --> 00:00:48.500 +[action] Pause. + +00:00:48.500 --> 00:00:52.000 + +Je vois que vous avez un chou. + +00:00:52.000 --> 00:00:54.000 +[caption] I SEE THAT YOU HAVE A CABBAGE + +00:00:54.000 --> 00:00:56.000 + +Oui. + +00:00:56.000 --> 00:00:58.000 +[caption] YES + +00:00:58.000 --> 00:01:04.000 +[action] Stig starts to laugh falsely; the girl joins in. A miserable attempt at joy and togetherness. The girl stops laughing before Stig. + +00:01:04.000 --> 00:01:08.000 + +Certainement il fait beau ce matin. + +00:01:08.000 --> 00:01:10.500 +[caption] IT CERTAINLY IS A LOVELY DAY ALL RIGHT + +00:01:10.500 --> 00:01:14.000 +[action] Stig wanders out of shot but is clearly pushed back into frame. + +00:01:14.000 --> 00:01:17.000 + +Je suis révolutionnaire. + +00:01:17.000 --> 00:01:19.000 +[caption] I AM A REVOLUTIONARY + +00:01:19.000 --> 00:01:20.500 + +Oh. + +00:01:20.500 --> 00:01:24.000 + +Qu'est-ce que vous avez dit? + +00:01:24.000 --> 00:01:26.000 +[caption] WHAT DID YOU SAY? + +00:01:26.000 --> 00:01:29.000 + +J'ai dit 'oh'. + +00:01:29.000 --> 00:01:31.000 +[caption] I SAID "OH" + +00:01:31.000 --> 00:01:34.000 + +Ah. Très interessant. + +00:01:34.000 --> 00:01:36.000 +[caption] AH. VERY INTERESTING + +00:01:36.000 --> 00:01:40.000 +[action] Cut to pimply youth in studio. + +00:01:40.000 --> 00:02:00.000 + +Brian Distel and Brianette Zatapathique there in an improvised scene from Jean Kenneth Longueur's new movie 'Le Fromage Grand'. Brian and Brianette symbolize the breakdown in communication in our modern society in this exciting new film and Longueur is saying to us, his audience, 'go on, protest, do something about it, assault the manager, demand your money back'. Later on in the film, in a brilliantly conceived montage, Longueur mercilessly exposes the violence underlying our society when Brian and Brianerte again meet on yet another rubbish dump. + +00:02:00.000 --> 00:02:05.000 +[action] Different part of the same dump. Girl now holds a head of lettuce. Stig enters. + +00:02:05.000 --> 00:02:08.000 + +Bonjour encore. + +00:02:08.000 --> 00:02:10.000 +[caption] HELLO AGAIN + +00:02:10.000 --> 00:02:12.000 + +Bonjour. + +00:02:12.000 --> 00:02:14.000 +[caption] GOOD MORNING + +00:02:14.000 --> 00:02:19.000 + +Je vois que aujourd'hui vous avez une co-laitue. + +00:02:19.000 --> 00:02:22.000 +[caption] I SEE YOU'VE GOT A WEBB'S WONDER TODAY + +00:02:22.000 --> 00:02:24.000 + +Oui. + +00:02:24.000 --> 00:02:26.000 + +Bon. + +00:02:26.000 --> 00:02:28.000 +[caption] GOOD + +00:02:28.000 --> 00:02:30.000 +[action] Intercut: machine-gunner in plane (war film). + +00:02:30.000 --> 00:02:33.000 + +Il fait beau encore. + +00:02:33.000 --> 00:02:35.000 +[caption] IT'S A LOVELY DAY AGAIN + +00:02:35.000 --> 00:02:37.000 +[action] Shot of Paris riots and clubbing. + +00:02:37.000 --> 00:02:39.000 + +Oui. + +00:02:39.000 --> 00:02:41.000 +[caption] YES + +00:02:41.000 --> 00:02:43.000 + +Bon. + +00:02:43.000 --> 00:02:45.000 +[caption] GOOD + +00:02:45.000 --> 00:02:47.000 +[action] Shot of Michael being struck on head with a club by John. + +00:02:47.000 --> 00:02:50.000 + +Vous pouvez dire ça encore. + +00:02:50.000 --> 00:02:52.000 +[caption] IT CERTAINLY IS A LOVELY DAY ALL RIGHT + +00:02:52.000 --> 00:02:55.000 +[action] Shot of collapsing building; then a man at a piano (Graham); lid slams on his hands. + +00:02:55.000 --> 00:02:58.000 + +Certainement il fait beau ce matin. + +00:02:58.000 --> 00:03:00.000 +[caption] IT CERTAINLY IS A LOVELY DAY ALL RIGHT + +00:03:00.000 --> 00:03:05.000 +[action] Shots: aeroplanes bombing; chef receiving arrow in chest; girl kicking tall man on shin; rockets fired from plane. + +00:03:05.000 --> 00:03:07.000 + +Oui. + +00:03:07.000 --> 00:03:09.000 +[caption] YES + +00:03:09.000 --> 00:03:11.000 +[action] Shot of hydrogen bomb. + +00:03:11.000 --> 00:03:15.000 + +Il fait beau hier. Ha ha ha. + +00:03:15.000 --> 00:03:17.000 +[caption] IT WAS LOVELY YESTERDAY. HA HA HA + +00:03:17.000 --> 00:03:21.000 +[action] Shots: ack-ack gun; man punched by boxing glove; nun kicks policeman in the crotch. + +00:03:21.000 --> 00:03:23.000 + +Ha ha. + +00:03:23.000 --> 00:03:25.000 +[caption] HA HA. HA HA. HA HA. + +00:03:25.000 --> 00:03:29.000 +[action] Shots: Spitfire; Korean soldier; man being beheaded. + +00:03:29.000 --> 00:03:32.000 + +Quelle surprise de vous voir encore. + +00:03:32.000 --> 00:03:34.000 +[caption] WHAT A SURPRISE TO SEE YOU AGAIN + +00:03:34.000 --> 00:03:42.000 +[action] Rapid violent montage: Paris riots; foot stamped; blazing building; eye poked with umbrella; battleship broadside; man in underpants doused; soccer violence; man knifed by a Greek Orthodox priest. + +00:03:42.000 --> 00:03:45.000 + +Je t'aime. + +00:03:45.000 --> 00:03:47.000 +[caption] I LOVE YOU + +00:03:47.000 --> 00:03:50.000 + +Je t'aime. + +00:03:50.000 --> 00:03:52.000 +[caption] I LOVE YOU + +00:03:52.000 --> 00:03:58.000 +[action] They smile happily. A ticking is heard; they look fearfully at the cos lettuce. The lettuce explodes in slow motion, blowing them apart. Tatters float; camera pans to autumn leaves. Freeze frame. + +00:03:58.000 --> 00:04:00.000 +[caption] FIN + +00:04:00.000 --> 00:04:18.000 +[action] Cut back to Phil in studio. + +00:04:18.000 --> 00:04:40.000 + +Pretty strong meat there from Longueur who is saying, of course, that ultimately materialism, in this case the Webb's Wonder lettuce, must destroy us all. That was for O. Simon, K. Simon, P. Simon and R. Sparrow of Leicester. Later on, we're going to take a look at John Wayne's latest movie, 'Buckets of Blood Pouring Out of People's Heads' but now we look ahead. On Tuesday Chris Conger took a BBC film unit to the location where 20th Century Vole are shooting their latest epic 'Scott of the Antarctic'. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_23/2_Scott_of_the_Antarctic.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_23/2_Scott_of_the_Antarctic.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..63106942 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_23/2_Scott_of_the_Antarctic.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,388 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Paignton beach production segment including McRettin and Schlick. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Chris Conger stands with back to pier; holidaymakers behind. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:18.000 + +Sea, sand and sunshine make Paignton the queen of the English Riviera. But for the next six months this sleepy Devonshire resort will be transformed into the blizzard-swept wastes of the South Pole. For today shooting starts on the epic 'Scott of the Antarctic', produced by Gerry Schlick. + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:20.000 + +Hello. + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:24.000 + +Gerry, you chose Paignton as the location for Scott. + +00:00:24.000 --> 00:00:25.500 + +Right, right. + +00:00:25.500 --> 00:00:29.500 + +Isn't it a bit of a drawback that there's no snow here? + +00:00:29.500 --> 00:00:36.000 + +Well, we have 28,000 cubic feet of Wintrex, which is a new white foam rubber which actually on screen looks more like snow than snow… + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:42.000 +[action] Crew nail and stick white foam over things; others paint sand white. It looks terrible. + +00:00:42.000 --> 00:00:46.000 + +… and 1,600 cubic US furlongs of white paint, with a special snow finish. + +00:00:46.000 --> 00:00:49.000 + +And I believe Kirk Vilb is playing the title role. + +00:00:49.000 --> 00:01:06.000 + +That is correct. We were very thrilled and honoured when Kirk agreed to play the part of Lieutenant Scott because a star of his magnitude can pick and choose, but he read the title and just flipped. And directing we have a very fine young British director, James McRettin, who's been collaborating on the screenplay, of course Jimmy… + +00:01:06.000 --> 00:01:12.000 +[action] Cut to Kirk Vilb: wearing furs open at chest; chest wig being stuck on; icing sugar on nose and eyebrows. + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:20.000 +[action] McRettin rushes into foreground, energetic and scattered. + +00:01:20.000 --> 00:01:28.000 + +Oh, there you are. Hello. Hello. No problem. Have a drink. Have a drink. Great. Hello. Marvellous. Marvellous. Hello. Rewrite. Oh this is really great. I mean, it's really saying something, don't you think? + +00:01:28.000 --> 00:01:31.000 + +Have you started shooting yet? + +00:01:31.000 --> 00:01:36.000 + +Yes, yes. Great. Perfect. No, no, we haven't started yet. No. But great - great. + +00:01:36.000 --> 00:01:40.000 + +What is the first scene that you shoot this morning? + +00:01:40.000 --> 00:01:52.000 + +Great. Terrific. Oh it's great. No problem. We'll sort it out on the floor. Sort it out on the floor. No problem. This film is basically pro-humanity and anti-bad things and it rips aside the hypocritical facade of our society's gin and tonic and leaves a lot of sacred cows rolling around in agony, have a drink, have a drink. + +00:01:52.000 --> 00:01:56.000 + +But which scene are we shooting first, Jimmy? + +00:01:56.000 --> 00:02:06.000 + +Yes, great. Oh, marvellous. Which scene are we shooting first? What? It's scene one. Scene one. It's in the middle of the movie. Well, it is now. I rewrote it. I thought we cut that? Didn't we cut that? + +00:02:06.000 --> 00:02:08.000 + +No, we didn't. + +00:02:08.000 --> 00:02:16.000 + +We didn't. Oh great. That's even better. I'll put it back in. Rewrite. Scene one's back in everyone. Scene one's back in. Great. Great. This is the scene - outside the tent - it's all bloody marvelous. It makes you want to throw up. + +00:02:16.000 --> 00:02:20.000 +[action] Cut to Schlick and Conger on the beach. + +00:02:20.000 --> 00:02:36.000 + +Now in this scene Lieutenant Scott returns to camp in the early morning after walking the huskies to have brunch with the rest of his team. Oates, played by your very own lovely Terence Lemming, who is an English cockney officer seconded to the US Navy, and Bowers played by Seymour Fortescue, the Olympic pole vaulter. + +00:02:36.000 --> 00:02:40.000 +[action] Film: Scott approaches Oates and Bowers. He has two large boxes strapped to his feet to look taller. + +00:02:40.000 --> 00:02:42.000 + +Hi, Lieutenant. + +00:02:42.000 --> 00:02:46.000 + +Hi, Oatesy. Sure is a beautiful day already. + +00:02:46.000 --> 00:02:48.000 +[action] McRettin rushes in excitedly. + +00:02:48.000 --> 00:02:49.500 + +Great, great. + +00:02:49.500 --> 00:02:51.500 + +What? What are you saying? + +00:02:51.500 --> 00:02:54.000 + +I was just saying great, great. Cue Evans. + +00:02:54.000 --> 00:02:58.000 +[action] Sexy girl with long blond hair in short pink fur coat enters, walking in a trench so she is knee-height to towering Scott. + +00:02:58.000 --> 00:03:00.000 + +And this is Vanilla Hoare as Miss Evans. + +00:03:00.000 --> 00:03:02.000 + +Miss Evans? + +00:03:02.000 --> 00:03:03.000 + +Right. + +00:03:03.000 --> 00:03:06.000 +[action] Miss Evans is now beneath Scott at knee height. + +00:03:06.000 --> 00:03:09.000 + +Good morning, Miss Evans. + +00:03:09.000 --> 00:03:12.000 + +Oh, I've forgotten my line. + +00:03:12.000 --> 00:03:14.000 + +What's her line? What's her line? + +00:03:14.000 --> 00:03:16.000 +[action] A girl runs in with script. + +00:03:16.000 --> 00:03:19.000 + +It's 'Good morning, Captain Scott'. + +00:03:19.000 --> 00:03:25.000 + +Oh, yeah. 'Good morning, Captain Sc'..; oh, I'm just not really very happy with that line. Could I just say 'Hi Scottie'? + +00:03:25.000 --> 00:03:27.000 + +Great. Great. Rewrite. Cue. + +00:03:27.000 --> 00:03:36.000 + +Hi Scarrie! Oh, sorry. Hi Stocky! Oh - I'm sorry again. Oh, Jim. I'm just unhappy with this line. Hey, can I do it all sort of kooky, like this? Hi Scottie! + +00:03:36.000 --> 00:03:38.000 + +Great! We'll shoot it. + +00:03:38.000 --> 00:03:40.000 + +Are you sure that's right? + +00:03:40.000 --> 00:03:42.000 + +Oh, it's great. + +00:03:42.000 --> 00:03:44.000 +[action] Gerry Schlick walks into the shot. + +00:03:44.000 --> 00:03:45.000 + +Jim. + +00:03:45.000 --> 00:03:46.000 + +Jim! Jim! Oh, me! + +00:03:46.000 --> 00:03:52.000 + +Jim, I feel we may be running into some problems here in the area of height. + +00:03:52.000 --> 00:03:53.500 + +Great! Where are they? + +00:03:53.500 --> 00:03:55.000 + +Where are who? + +00:03:55.000 --> 00:03:57.500 + +I don't know. I was getting confused. + +00:03:57.500 --> 00:04:04.000 + +Jim, I feel here, that Scott may be too tall in the area of height with reference to Vanilla who is too near the ground in the area of being too short at this time. + +00:04:04.000 --> 00:04:08.000 + +Great … Oh, I know. I'm going to dig a pit for Scott and put a box in Vanilla's trench. + +00:04:08.000 --> 00:04:12.000 + +Say, why don't I take the boxes off and Vanilla get up out of the trench? + +00:04:12.000 --> 00:04:14.000 + +It wouldn't work… It's even better! Great. Rewrite! + +00:04:14.000 --> 00:04:15.500 + +What was that? + +00:04:15.500 --> 00:04:20.000 + +Oh, it's easy. I've worked it out. Scott takes his boxes off and you don't stand in the trench. + +00:04:20.000 --> 00:04:22.000 + +I say my lines out of the trench? + +00:04:22.000 --> 00:04:24.000 + +Even better. Great. + +00:04:24.000 --> 00:04:28.000 + +But I've never acted out of a trench. I might fall over. It's dangerous. + +00:04:28.000 --> 00:04:30.000 + +Oh well, could you just try it? + +00:04:30.000 --> 00:04:40.000 + +Look, you crumb bum, I'm a star. Star, star, star. I don't get a million dollars to act out of a trench. I played Miss St John the Baptist in a trench, and I played Miss Napoleon Bonaparte in a trench, and I played Miss Alexander Fleming in a furrow so if you want this scene played out of a trench, well you just get yourself a goddamn stuntman. I played Miss Galileo in a groove and I played Mrs Jesus Christ in a geological syncline, so don't… + +00:04:40.000 --> 00:04:44.000 +[action] Evans walks along in trench revealing she too has two boxes strapped to her feet; exits. + +00:04:44.000 --> 00:04:48.000 + +Great. Great everyone. Lunch now. Lunch. It's all in the can. Good morning's work. + +00:04:48.000 --> 00:04:50.000 + +But you haven't done a shot. + +00:04:50.000 --> 00:04:54.000 + +Just keeping morale up. + +00:04:54.000 --> 00:04:56.000 +[action] McRettin tries to drink from his viewfinder. + +00:04:56.000 --> 00:05:00.000 +[caption] The same afternoon. + +00:05:00.000 --> 00:05:08.000 + +Now this afternoon we're going to shoot the scene where Scott gets off the boat on to the ice floe and he sees the lion and he fights it and kills it and the blood goes pssssssssshhh in slow motion. + +00:05:08.000 --> 00:05:10.000 + +But there aren't any lions in the Antarctic. + +00:05:10.000 --> 00:05:11.500 + +What? + +00:05:11.500 --> 00:05:14.000 + +There aren't any lions in the Antarctic. + +00:05:14.000 --> 00:05:20.000 + +You're right. There are no lions in the Antarctic. That's ridiculous! Whoever heard of a lion in the Antarctic? Right. Lose the lion. + +00:05:20.000 --> 00:05:22.000 + +Got to keep the lion. It's great! + +00:05:22.000 --> 00:05:23.500 + +Lose the lion. + +00:05:23.500 --> 00:05:28.000 + +Great. We're losing the lion. Rewrite. Lose the lion everyone. That's fantastic. + +00:05:28.000 --> 00:05:31.000 + +What's this about our losing the lion? + +00:05:31.000 --> 00:05:36.000 + +Well, Kirk, we thought perhaps we might lose the fight with the lion a little bit, Kirk, angel. + +00:05:36.000 --> 00:05:37.500 + +Why? + +00:05:37.500 --> 00:05:41.000 + +Well, Kirkie, doll, there are no lions in the Antarctic, baby. + +00:05:41.000 --> 00:05:43.000 + +I get to fight the lion. + +00:05:43.000 --> 00:05:44.500 + +It'd be silly. + +00:05:44.500 --> 00:05:50.000 + +Listen, I gotta fight the lion. That's what that guy Scott's all about. I know. I've studied him already. + +00:05:50.000 --> 00:05:52.500 + +But why couldn't you fight a penguin? + +00:05:52.500 --> 00:05:54.000 + +Great! + +00:05:54.000 --> 00:05:56.000 +[action] McRettin falls over. + +00:05:56.000 --> 00:05:58.000 + +Fight a rotten penguin? + +00:05:58.000 --> 00:06:06.000 + +It needn't be a little penguin. It can be the biggest penguin you've ever seen. An electric penguin, twenty feet high, with long green tentacles that sting people, and you can stab it in the wings and the blood can go spurting psssssshhhh in slow motion. + +00:06:06.000 --> 00:06:08.000 + +The lion is in the contract. + +00:06:08.000 --> 00:06:09.500 + +He fights the lion. + +00:06:09.500 --> 00:06:14.000 + +Even better. Great. Have a drink. Lose the penguin. Stand by to shoot. + +00:06:14.000 --> 00:06:16.000 +[action] McRettin falls over again. + +00:06:16.000 --> 00:06:18.000 + +Where do they have lions? + +00:06:18.000 --> 00:06:19.500 + +Africa. + +00:06:19.500 --> 00:06:24.000 + +That's it. Scott's in Africa. As many lions as we need. + +00:06:24.000 --> 00:06:25.500 + +Great! + +00:06:25.500 --> 00:06:32.000 + +He's looking for a pole no one else knows about. That ties in with the sand. Right. Paint the sand yellow again. Okay, let's get this show on the road. 'Scott of the Sahara.' + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_23/3_Scott_of_the_Sahara.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_23/3_Scott_of_the_Sahara.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..7834d691 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_23/3_Scott_of_the_Sahara.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,53 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Trailer-style VO and action montage. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:03.000 +[action] Cut instantly to sky. + +00:00:03.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[caption] SCOTT OF THE SAHARA + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:14.000 + +Booming out of the pages of history comes a story of three men and one woman whose courage shocked a generation. + +00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:20.000 +[action] Blinding sun. Pan down to Paignton beach. Scott, Evans, Oates, and Bowers in furs cross sand on snowshoes, pulling a sledge with mongrel dogs disguised as huskies. + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:40.000 + +From the same team that brought you 'Lawrence of Glareorgan', 'Bridge Over the River Trent', 'The Mad Woman of Biggleswade', and 'Krakatoa, East of Leamington' comes the story of three people and a woman united by fate who set out in search of the fabled Pole of the Sahara and found … themselves. See … Lieutenant Scott's death struggle with a crazed desert lion. + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:01:00.000 +[action] The four walk; they stop, stare in horror. Stock shot of lion running out of jungle; cuts with rigid stuffed lion hitting Scott. Montage: Scott wrestles stuffed lion, then actor in tatty lion suit; lion smashes chair over Scott; Scott kicks lion's shin; lion hops, picks up knife; Scott kicks knife away; socks lion on jaw; lion collapses in slow motion; phoney blood spurts. + +00:01:00.000 --> 00:01:08.000 + +See Ensign Oates' frank adult death struggle with the spine-chilling giant electric penguin… + +00:01:08.000 --> 00:01:28.000 +[action] Oates looks up; shadow crosses him. Reverse shot of small model penguin lit up, appearing huge by perspective. Oates desperately undresses to posing briefs; penguin throws tentacle; Oates struggles; twirls stone in briefs like a sling; releases; penguin hit on beak and falls backwards. + +00:01:28.000 --> 00:01:34.000 + +… See Miss Evans pursued by the man-eating roll-top writing desk. + +00:01:34.000 --> 00:01:52.000 +[action] Miss Evans runs screaming. Desk (man inside) chases; roll-top roars, showing fearsome white teeth. Evans' clothing is torn by three widely spaced cactuses; she becomes nearly nude and runs out of shot, revealing an announcer. + +00:01:52.000 --> 00:01:55.000 + +And now for something completely different. + +00:01:55.000 --> 00:01:57.000 + +It's… + +00:01:57.000 --> 00:02:12.000 +[action] Animation: dancing teeth; letter being resealed and posted backwards, ending in a real post office. A worker removes the stamp and hands it to a man. + +00:02:12.000 --> 00:02:14.000 + +Five pence please. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_23/4_Fish_Licence.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_23/4_Fish_Licence.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..2579be4a --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_23/4_Fish_Licence.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,201 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Mr Praline requests a fish license; includes Mayor sequence. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] A man walks out backwards, passing Mr Praline entering. Praline notices, puzzled, and moves to the first grille marked 'stamps and licences'. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:20.000 + +Excuse me, I would like to buy a fish license, please. The man's sign must be wrong. I have in the past noticed a marked discrepancy between these post office signs and the activities carried on beneath. But soft, let us see how Dame Fortune smiles upon my next postal adventure! Hello, I would like to buy a fish licence, please. + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:22.000 + +A what? + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:26.000 + +A license for my pet fish, Eric. + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:28.000 + +How did you know my name was Eric? + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:33.000 + +No no no, my fish's name is Eric, Eric the fish. 'E's an 'alibut. + +00:00:33.000 --> 00:00:34.500 + +A what? + +00:00:34.500 --> 00:00:36.500 + +He is an halibut. + +00:00:36.500 --> 00:00:39.500 + +You've got a pet halibut? + +00:00:39.500 --> 00:00:43.500 + +Yes. I chose him out of thousands. I didn't like the others, they were all too flat. + +00:00:43.500 --> 00:00:45.500 + +You must be a loony. + +00:00:45.500 --> 00:00:58.000 + +I am not a looney! Why should I be tied with the epithet looney merely because I have a pet halibut? I've heard tell that Sir Gerald Nabardo has a pet prawn called Simon and you wouldn't call him a looney; furthermore, Dawn Pailthorpe, the lady show-jumper, had a clam, called Stafford, after the late Chancellor, Allan Bullock has two pikes, both called Chris, and Marcel Proust had an haddock! So, if you're calling the author of 'A la recherche du temps perdu' a looney, I shall have to ask you to step outside! + +00:00:58.000 --> 00:01:02.000 + +All right, all right, all right. You want a licence. + +00:01:02.000 --> 00:01:03.500 + +Yes. + +00:01:03.500 --> 00:01:05.000 + +For a fish. + +00:01:05.000 --> 00:01:06.000 + +Yes. + +00:01:06.000 --> 00:01:08.000 + +You are a loony. + +00:01:08.000 --> 00:01:16.000 + +Look, it's a bleeding pet, isn't it? I've got a license for me pet dog Eric, and I've got a license for me pet cat Eric… + +00:01:16.000 --> 00:01:18.000 + +You don't need a license for a cat. + +00:01:18.000 --> 00:01:21.000 + +I bleeding well do and I got one. Ho, ho, you're not catching me out there. + +00:01:21.000 --> 00:01:24.000 + +There's no such thing as a bloody cat license. + +00:01:24.000 --> 00:01:25.500 + +Yes there is! + +00:01:25.500 --> 00:01:27.000 + +No there isn't! + +00:01:27.000 --> 00:01:36.000 +[action] Rapid back-and-forth: 'Is!'/'Isn't!' repeated several times. + +00:01:36.000 --> 00:01:38.000 + +What's that then? + +00:01:38.000 --> 00:01:42.000 + +This is a dog license with the word 'dog' crossed out and the word 'cat' written in in crayon. + +00:01:42.000 --> 00:01:44.000 + +The man didn't have the proper form. + +00:01:44.000 --> 00:01:45.500 + +What man? + +00:01:45.500 --> 00:01:48.500 + +The man from the cat detector van. + +00:01:48.500 --> 00:01:50.500 + +Loony detector van, you mean. + +00:01:50.500 --> 00:01:52.500 + +It's people like you what cause unrest. + +00:01:52.500 --> 00:01:54.000 + +All right, what cat detector van? + +00:01:54.000 --> 00:02:00.000 + +The cat detector van from the Ministry of Housinge. + +00:02:00.000 --> 00:02:01.500 + +Housinge? + +00:02:01.500 --> 00:02:12.000 + +It was spelt like that on the van. I'm very observant!. I never seen so many bleeding aerials. The man said that their equipment could pinpoint a purr at four hundred yards…and Eric, being such a happy cat, was a piece of cake. + +00:02:12.000 --> 00:02:14.500 + +How much did you pay for this? + +00:02:14.500 --> 00:02:17.500 + +Sixty quid, and eight guineas for the fruit bat. + +00:02:17.500 --> 00:02:19.000 + +What fruit bat? + +00:02:19.000 --> 00:02:21.000 + +Eric the fruit-bat. + +00:02:21.000 --> 00:02:23.000 + +Are all your pets called Eric? + +00:02:23.000 --> 00:02:28.000 + +There's nothing so odd about that: Kemal Ataturk had an entire menagerie, all called Abdul! + +00:02:28.000 --> 00:02:29.500 + +No he didn't! + +00:02:29.500 --> 00:02:36.000 + +He did, he did, he did, he did and did. There you are. 'Kemal Ataturk, the Man' by E. W. Swanton with a foreword by Paul Anka, page 91, please. + +00:02:36.000 --> 00:02:40.000 + +I owe you an apology, sir. + +00:02:40.000 --> 00:02:43.000 + +Spoken like a gentleman, sir. Now, are you going to give me a fish license? + +00:02:43.000 --> 00:02:46.000 + +I promise you that there is no such thing. You don't need one. + +00:02:46.000 --> 00:02:49.000 + +Then I would like a statement to that effect signed by the Lord Mayor. + +00:02:49.000 --> 00:02:53.000 +[action] Fanfare of trumpets. The Mayor, gorgeously dressed, enters with dignitaries, flanked by trumpeters. + +00:02:53.000 --> 00:02:54.500 + +You're in luck. + +00:02:54.500 --> 00:03:20.000 + +And now, there is the Mayor. Surely the third tallest mayor in Derby's history. And there are the Aldermen magnificently resplendent in their Aldermanic hose and just look at the power in those thighs. The New Zealanders are going to find it pretty tough going in the set pieces in the second half… So Dawn Palethorpe with one clear round on Sir Gerald… and now the Mayor has reached the Great Customer Mr Eric Praline. And now the Mayoral human being takes the Mayoral Pen in the Mayoral hand and watched by the Lady Mayoress, who of course scored that magnificent try in the first half, signs the fishy exemption and the Great Customer, Mr Eric Praline, who is understandably awed by the magnificence and even the absurdity of this great occasion here at Cardiff Arms Park, has finally gone spare and there is the going sparal look on the front of his head. And now the Aldermen are finishing their oranges and leaving the post office for the start of the second half. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_23/5_Derby_Council_v.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_23/5_Derby_Council_v.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..1d27e26d --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_23/5_Derby_Council_v.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,33 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Match commentary and analysis segment. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:10.000 +[action] The dignitaries exit eating oranges. Cut to a rugby field. Crowd roars as the aldermen, mayor, mayoress, town clerk, Dawn Palethorpe (on a horse), and the borough surveyor run onto the pitch and take positions. + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:50.000 + +And here come the Derby Council XV following the All Blacks out on to the pitch. There, in the centre of the picture you can see Dawn Palethorpe on Sir Gerald - one of the fastest wingers we must have seen in England this season. On the left hand side of the picture the Lord Mayor has been running such wonderful possession for Derby Council in the lines out and it's the All Blacks to kick off. Wilson to kick off. Oh, I can see there the Chairman of the By-ways and Highways Committee who's obviously recovered from that very nasty blow he got in that loose ball in the first half. And Wilson kicks off and it's the Town Clerk's taken the ball beautifully there, the All Blacks are up on it very fast and the whistle has gone. I'm not quite sure what happened there, I couldn't see, but there's a scrum-down. I think it's an All Blacks' ball. They were upon them very fast. Obviously they're going to try very hard in this half to wipe out this five-point deficit. Derby Council eight points to three up and Derby Council have got the ball against the head. There is the Borough Surveyor, the scrum-half is out of the … er, the Chairman of the Highway and By-way Committee who's kicked for touch. The line out - and it's into the line out and the Mayor has got the ball again. To the Borough Surveyor who's left out the Medical Officer of Health. Straight along the line to the Lady Mayoress and the Lady Mayoress has got to go through. Number two has missed her - he's taken to the full back - only the full back to beat and she has scored! The Lady Mayoress has scored, it's eleven points to three. + +00:00:50.000 --> 00:00:55.000 +[caption] NEW ZEALAND 3 DERBY COUNCIL 11 + +00:00:55.000 --> 00:01:00.000 +[action] Cut to linkman and Cliff Morgan in studio. + +00:01:00.000 --> 00:01:06.000 + +Cliff, this must have been a very disappointing result for the All Blacks. + +00:01:06.000 --> 00:01:22.000 + +Well, they've had very bad luck on the tour so far. They missed four very easy kicks against the Exeter Amateur Operatic Society, which must have cost them the match and then of course there was that crippling defeat at the hands of the Derry and Toms Soft Toy Department, so I don't think they can be really fancying their chances against the London Pooves on Saturday. + +00:01:22.000 --> 00:01:26.000 + +And what about China? + +00:01:26.000 --> 00:01:40.000 + +Well, whether Mao Tse Tung is alive or not, Lin Piao has a stranglehold on the central committee which Lin Shao Chi can't break, so it remains to be seen whether Chou En Lai can really get his finger out and get going in the second half. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_23/6_Long_John_Silver_Impersonators_v.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_23/6_Long_John_Silver_Impersonators_v.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..c407c4b6 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_23/6_Long_John_Silver_Impersonators_v.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,27 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Edited highlights and show close. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:08.000 + +Well, thank you Cliff. Tonight's other outstanding match was the semi-final between the Bournemouth Gynaecologists and the Watford Long John Silver Impersonators. We bring you edited highlights of the match. + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:20.000 +[action] Rapid montage: competent gynaecologists in surgical gowns score freely against immobile LJSI team who stand saying 'aaah! Jim lad' as goals rain in. + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:24.000 +[action] Sudden cut to studio. A presenter in front of curtain catches a ball thrown from off. He smiles. + +00:00:24.000 --> 00:00:36.000 + +Well, that's about it for tonight ladies and gentlemen, but remember if you've enjoyed watching the show just half as much as we've enjoyed doing it, then we've enjoyed it twice as much as you. Ha, ha, ha. + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:40.000 +[action] A sixteen-ton weight falls on the Presenter. + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:48.000 +[action] Cut to montage of destruction, buildings falling down, bombs etc. + +00:00:48.000 --> 00:00:52.000 +[caption] Roll credits. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_24_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/0_Episode24_head_tail.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_24_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/0_Episode24_head_tail.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..778e7780 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_24_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/0_Episode24_head_tail.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,39 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings and structured cues for episode intro and credits/head-tail content. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 +[action] Episode Twenty-four title card displayed. + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:08.000 +[caption] Colour code: John Cleese - Michael Palin - Eric Idle - Graham Chapman - Terry Jones - Terry Gilliam - Carol Cleveland. + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:14.000 +[action] Top-of-page links enumerate skits 1–14. + +00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:22.000 +[action] Opening credits animation begins. + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:28.000 + +It's… + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:40.000 +[action] Credits/music stick and repeat; animation resumes and completes. + +00:24:00.000 --> 00:24:05.000 +[action] Trendy pop-music set with coloured lights. Crates with microphones on stage. + +00:24:05.000 --> 00:24:20.000 +[caption] Music: 'Yummy, Yummy, Yummy, I've got love in my tummy' by Jackie Charlton and the Tonettes. + +00:24:20.000 --> 00:24:40.000 +[action] Roll credits over music; fade out; BBC 1 caption. + +00:24:40.000 --> 00:24:45.000 + +For those of you who may have just missed 'Monty Python's Flying Circus', here it is again. + +00:24:45.000 --> 00:25:05.000 +[action] Entire show recapped in flash clips (~20 seconds). + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_24_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/10_'How_not_to_be_seen'.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_24_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/10_'How_not_to_be_seen'.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..a7bb724f --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_24_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/10_'How_not_to_be_seen'.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,57 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Public service film demonstrating the perils of being seen. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 + +In this picture there are forty people. None of them can be seen. In this film we hope to show how not to be seen. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:08.000 +[caption] 'HM GOVERNMENT, PUBLIC SERVICE FILM NO. 42 PARA 6. 'HOW NOT TO BE SEEN'' + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:16.000 + +This is Mr E. R. Bradshaw, of Napier Court, Black Lion Road, SE5. He cannot be seen. Now I'm going to ask him to stand up. Mr Bradshaw will you stand up please? + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:22.000 +[action] Middle distance: smiling holidaymaker stands up. Wind, then loud gunshot; Mr Bradshaw crumples. + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:25.000 + +This demonstrates the value of not being seen. + +00:00:25.000 --> 00:00:30.000 +[action] Cut to scrubland. + +00:00:30.000 --> 00:00:36.000 + +In this picture we cannot see Mrs. B.J. Smegma of 13, The Crescent, Belmont. Mrs Smegma will you stand up please. + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:41.000 +[action] Pepperpot stands up near frame edge; shot rings out; she leaps and dies. Cut to bush in open land. + +00:00:41.000 --> 00:00:58.000 + +This is Mr Nesbitt of Harlow New Town. Mr Nesbit would you stand up please. [pause] Mr Nesbitt has learnt the first lesson of not being seen. However he has chosen a very obvious piece of cover. [action] (bush explodes; cut to three bushes) Mr. E.V. Lambert of 'Homeleigh', The Burrows, Oswestry, has presented us with a poser. We do not know which bush he is behind, but we can soon find out. [action] (left bush explodes, then right, finally middle; muffled scream; smoke subsides) Yes it was the middle one. + +00:00:58.000 --> 00:01:08.000 +[action] Farmland: waterbutt, low wall, pile of leaves, parked car, bushes/trees. + +00:01:08.000 --> 00:01:20.000 + +Mr Ken Andrews, of Leighton Road, Slough, has concealed himself extremely well. He could be almost anywhere. He could be behind the wall, inside the water barrel, beneath a pile of leaves, up in the tree, squatting down behind the car, concealed in a hollow, or crouched behind any one of a hundred bushes. However we happen to know he's in the water barrel. + +00:01:20.000 --> 00:01:25.000 +[action] Water barrel blows up in the biggest explosion yet. Pan from beach huts to beach/sea. + +00:01:25.000 --> 00:01:34.000 + +Mr. and Mrs. Watson of 'Ivy Cottage', Worplesdon Road, Hull, chose a very cunning way of not being seen. When we called at their house, we found that they had gone away on two weeks holiday. They had not left any forwarding address, and they had bolted and barred the house to prevent us getting in. However a neighbour told us where they were. + +00:01:34.000 --> 00:01:38.000 +[action] Camera rests on an obvious isolated beach hut; it blows up. Cut to building site with Gumby. + +00:01:38.000 --> 00:01:50.000 + +And here is the neighbour who told us where they were [action] (he blows up) Nobody likes a clever dick. [action] (stock film of small house) Here is where he lived [action] (it blows up) And this is where Lord Langdon lived who refused to speak to us [action] (it blows up). So did the gentleman who lived here…. [action] (house blows) … and here … [action] (ditto) and of course here….. [action] (series of quick cuts of atom/hydrogen bomb impacts) and Manchester and the West Midlands, Spain, China … [caption] (mad laugh) + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_24_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/11_Crossing_the_Atlantic_on_a_tricycle.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_24_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/11_Crossing_the_Atlantic_on_a_tricycle.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..dfd791db --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_24_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/11_Crossing_the_Atlantic_on_a_tricycle.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,18 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Presenter interrupts violent scenes; Roy Bent tricycle report. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Presentation desk. Film stops behind presenter. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:18.000 + +Ah, well I'm afraid we have to stop the film there, as some of the scenes which followed were of a violent nature which might have proved distressing to some of our viewers. Though not to me, I can tell you. + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:34.000 + +[action] Presenter turns to another camera. In Nova Scotia today, Mr Roy Bent of North Walsham in Norfolk became the first man to cross the Atlantic on a tricycle. His tricycle, specially adapted for the crossing, was ninety feet long, with a protective steel hull, three funnels, seventeen first-class cabins and a radar scanner. + +00:00:34.000 --> 00:00:38.000 +[action] Head and shoulders picture of Roy Bent appears on screen behind. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_24_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/12_Interview_in_filing_cabinet.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_24_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/12_Interview_in_filing_cabinet.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..14dbea9e --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_24_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/12_Interview_in_filing_cabinet.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,43 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Interview with Mr Grayson inside a filing cabinet; off-screen explosion gag. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:08.000 + +Mr Bent is in our Durham studios, which is rather unfortunate as we're all down here in London. And in London I have with me Mr Ludovic Grayson, the man who scored all six goals in Arsenal's 1-0 victory over the Turkish Champions FC Botty. [action] He turns to reveal five-foot-high filing cabinet. Ludovic… first of all, congratulations on the victory. + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:10.000 +[caption] (from inside filing cabinet) Thank you, David. + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:12.000 + +It should send you back to Botty with a big lead. + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:14.000 + +Oh yes, well we're fairly confident, David. + +00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:17.000 + +Well at the moment, Ludovic, you're crouching down inside a filing cabinet. + +00:00:17.000 --> 00:00:19.000 + +Yes that's right, David, I'm trying not to be seen. + +00:00:19.000 --> 00:00:21.000 + +I see. Is this through fear? + +00:00:21.000 --> 00:00:24.000 + +Oh no, no, it's common sense really. If they can't see you, they can't get you. + +00:00:24.000 --> 00:00:27.000 + +Ha, ha, ha, but of course they can still hear you. [sfx] (filing cabinet explodes) + +00:00:27.000 --> 00:00:32.000 + +Ludovic Grayson, thank you very much for coming on the program tonight. And we end the show with music. And here with their very latest recording 'Yummy, Yummy, Yummy, I've got love in my tummy' Jackie Charlton and the Tonettes. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_24_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/13_'Yummy_yummy'.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_24_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/13_'Yummy_yummy'.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..7775a405 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_24_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/13_'Yummy_yummy'.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,13 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Pop set with crates; song plays as credits roll. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Trendy pop-music set with coloured lights. Large packing crate at podium; backing vocals also in crates; band in crates. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:20.000 +[caption] Music: 'Yummy, Yummy, Yummy, I've got love in my tummy'. + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:28.000 +[action] Roll credits over music; fade out; BBC 1 caption. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_24_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/14_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus_again_in_thirty_seconds.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_24_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/14_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus_again_in_thirty_seconds.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..7aa6401f --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_24_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/14_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus_again_in_thirty_seconds.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,11 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Brief recap announcement and flash montage. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 + +For those of you who may have just missed 'Monty Python's Flying Circus', here it is again. + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:24.000 +[action] Entire show recapped in flash clips (~20 seconds). + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_24_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/1_Conquistador_Coffee_Campaign.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_24_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/1_Conquistador_Coffee_Campaign.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..24460fef --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_24_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/1_Conquistador_Coffee_Campaign.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,106 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Includes stage directions and joke cards. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:05.000 +[action] An office. Boss reading 'Chinese for Business Men', tries Chinese words. Knock at door. + +00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:08.000 + +Come in. [action] (Mr Frog comes in) Ah, Frog. + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:10.000 + +S. Frog, sir. + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:13.000 + +Shut up, I want to have a word with you, Frog. + +00:00:13.000 --> 00:00:15.000 + +S. Frog, sir. + +00:00:15.000 --> 00:00:25.000 + +Shut up. It's about your advertising campaign for Conquistador Coffee. Now, I've had the managing director of Conquistador to see me this morning and he's very unhappy with your campaign. Very unhappy. In fact, he's shot himself. + +00:00:25.000 --> 00:00:27.000 + +Badly, sir? + +00:00:27.000 --> 00:00:35.000 + +No, extremely well. [action] (lifts leg of body behind desk) [caption] (holds up card: 'joke') Before he went he left a note with the company secretary [action] (opens door; dead secretary falls out), the effect of which was how disappointed he was with your work and, in particular, why you had changed the name from Conquistador Instant Coffee to Conquistador Instant Leprosy. Why, Frog? + +00:00:35.000 --> 00:00:37.000 + +S. Frog, sir. + +00:00:37.000 --> 00:00:40.000 + +Shut up. Why did you do it? + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:43.000 + +It was a joke. + +00:00:43.000 --> 00:00:46.000 +[caption] (holds up card: 'joke') + +00:00:46.000 --> 00:00:51.000 + +No, no not a joke, a sales campaign. [caption] (holds up card: 'No, a Sales Campaign') + +00:00:51.000 --> 00:00:53.000 + +I see, Frog. + +00:00:53.000 --> 00:00:55.000 + +S. Frog, sir. + +00:00:55.000 --> 00:01:10.000 + +Shut up. Now, let's have a look at the sales chart. [action] (indicates plummeting sales graph) When you took over this account, Frog, Conquistador was a brand leader. Here you introduced your first campaign, 'Conquistador Coffee brings a new meaning to the word vomit'. Here you made your special introductory offer of a free dead dog with every jar, and this followed your second campaign 'the tingling fresh coffee which brings you exciting new cholera, mange, dropsy, the clap, hard pad and athlete's head. From the House of Conquistador'. + +00:01:10.000 --> 00:01:13.000 + +It was a soft-sell, sir + +00:01:13.000 --> 00:01:15.000 + +Why, Frog? + +00:01:15.000 --> 00:01:17.000 + +S. Frog, sir. + +00:01:17.000 --> 00:01:20.000 + +Shut up! Well? + +00:01:20.000 --> 00:01:23.000 + +Well, people know the name, sir. + +00:01:23.000 --> 00:01:31.000 + +They certainly do know the name - they burnt the factory down. The owner is hiding in my bathroom [sfx] (shot heard) - the owner was hiding in my bathroom. [caption] (holds up 'joke' card again) + +00:01:31.000 --> 00:01:34.000 + +You're not going to fire me, sir? + +00:01:34.000 --> 00:01:42.000 + +Fire you? Three men dead, the factory burnt down, the account lost and our firm completely bankrupt, what… what… what … can you possibly say? What excuse can you possibly make? + +00:01:42.000 --> 00:01:46.000 + +Sorry, father. [caption] (holds up the 'joke' card) + +00:01:46.000 --> 00:01:49.000 + +Oh, yes. Oh, incidentally your film's won a prize. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_24_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/2_Repeating_groove.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_24_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/2_Repeating_groove.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..4cadc256 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_24_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/2_Repeating_groove.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,14 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Film/music sticks; announcer resolves loop. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:08.000 +[action] Venetian blind opens to reveal film of coastline; travelogue pan; music sticks and repeats. + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:12.000 +[action] Gramophone record sticks; hand lifts needle; reveal announcer at desk. + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:22.000 + +Sorry about that. And now for something completely diff… [action] (film sticks, repeating) … completely different. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_24_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/3_Ramsay_MacDonald_striptease.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_24_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/3_Ramsay_MacDonald_striptease.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..de8274f0 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_24_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/3_Ramsay_MacDonald_striptease.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,25 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Newsreel intro; MacDonald strips; gag. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:02.000 + +It's… + +00:00:02.000 --> 00:00:10.000 +[action] Credits/music stick and repeat; resume to complete titles. Stock film of Ramsay MacDonald at Number 10. + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:16.000 + +1929. Stanley Baldwin's Conservative Government is defeated and Ramsay MacDonald becomes, for the second time, Prime Minister of England. + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:20.000 +[action] MacDonald walks into an empty room. (B/W film) + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:23.000 + +My, it's hot in here. + +00:00:23.000 --> 00:00:32.000 +[action] He strips down to black garter belt, suspenders and stockings. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_24_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/4_Job_Hunter.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_24_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/4_Job_Hunter.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..e469744b --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_24_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/4_Job_Hunter.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,157 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Exchange & Mart editor bargains during interview. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Mr Glans hides a fully practical old 8mm projector. Office sign: 'Exchange and Mart, Editor'. Knock at door. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:12.000 + +Hello, come in. [action] (enter Bee) Ah, hello, hello, how much do you want for that briefcase? + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:14.000 + +Well, I… + +00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:21.000 + +All right then, the briefcase and the umbrella. A fiver down, must be my final offer. + +00:00:21.000 --> 00:00:24.000 + +Well, I don't want to sell them. I've come for a job. + +00:00:24.000 --> 00:00:26.000 + +Oh, take a seat, take a seat. + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:28.000 + +Thank you. + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:40.000 + +I see you chose the canvas chair with the aluminium frame. I'll throw that in and a fiver, for the briefcase and the umbrella … no, make it fair, the briefcase and the umbrella and the two pens in your breast pocket and the chair's yours and a fiver and a pair of ex-German U-boat commander's binoculars. + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:42.000 + +Really, they are not for sale. + +00:00:42.000 --> 00:00:45.000 + +Not for sale, what does that mean? + +00:00:45.000 --> 00:00:49.000 + +I came about the advertisement for the job of assistant editor. + +00:00:49.000 --> 00:00:53.000 + +Oh yeah, right. Ah, OK, ah. How much experience in journalism? + +00:00:53.000 --> 00:00:55.000 + +Five years. + +00:00:55.000 --> 00:00:57.000 + +Right, typing speed? + +00:00:57.000 --> 00:00:59.000 + +Fifty. + +00:00:59.000 --> 00:01:01.000 + +O Levels? + +00:01:01.000 --> 00:01:03.000 + +Eight. + +00:01:03.000 --> 00:01:05.000 + +A Levels? + +00:01:05.000 --> 00:01:07.000 + +Two. + +00:01:07.000 --> 00:01:15.000 + +Right… Well, I'll give you the job, and the chair, and an all-wool ex-army sleeping bag … for the briefcase, umbrella, the pens in your breast pocket and your string vest. + +00:01:15.000 --> 00:01:17.000 + +When do I start? + +00:01:17.000 --> 00:01:19.000 + +Monday. + +00:01:19.000 --> 00:01:21.000 + +That's marvellous. + +00:01:21.000 --> 00:01:28.000 + +If you throw in the shoes as well. [action] (presses intercom) Hello, er … Miss Johnson? Could we have two coffees and biscuits please? + +00:01:28.000 --> 00:01:33.000 +[caption] (over intercom) One coffee and one biscuit for the two ex-army greatcoats and the alarm clock on the mantelpiece. + +00:01:33.000 --> 00:01:39.000 + +Two ex-army greatcoats and the alarm clock and a table lamp, for two coffees and biscuits. + +00:01:39.000 --> 00:01:43.000 +[action] ANIMATION: an elderly secretary at a desk in an empty room. + +00:01:43.000 --> 00:01:46.000 + +Two greatcoats and two table lamps. + +00:01:46.000 --> 00:01:49.000 +[action] Cut back to real office. + +00:01:49.000 --> 00:01:53.000 + +Two greatcoats, one table lamp and a desert boat. + +00:01:53.000 --> 00:01:56.000 +[action] Cut back to cartoon. + +00:01:56.000 --> 00:01:59.000 + +For two coffees and biscuits? Office. + +00:01:59.000 --> 00:02:02.000 + +Done. [action] Cartoon. + +00:02:02.000 --> 00:02:04.000 + +Done. + +00:02:04.000 --> 00:02:18.000 + +[voiceover] So Miss Johnson returned to her typing and dreamed her little dreamy dreams, unaware as she was of the cruel trick fate had in store for her. For Miss Johnson was about to fall victim of the dreaded international Chinese Communist Conspiracy. [action] (lots of little yellow men pour into the office) Yes, these fanatical thieves under the leadership of the so-called Mao Tse-tung (appears) had caught Miss Johnson off guard for one brief but fatal moment and destroyed her. (submerged in tide of yellow men) Just as they are ready to do anytime free men anywhere waver in their defence of democracy. + +00:02:18.000 --> 00:02:26.000 +[action] A sailing ship with American flag sails in. Zoom to Uncle Sam. + +00:02:26.000 --> 00:02:42.000 + +Yes, once again American defence proves its effectiveness against international communism. Using this diagram of a tooth to represent any small country, we can see how international communism works by eroding away from the inside [action] (tooth rots and collapses) When one country or tooth falls victim to international communism, its neighbours soon follow. [action] (remaining teeth fall sideways) In dentistry, this is known as Domino Theory. but with american defence the decay is stopped before it starts and that's why nine out of ten small countries choose American defense … + +00:02:42.000 --> 00:02:58.000 + +… Or Crelm toothpaste with the miracle ingredient, Fraudulin! The white car represents Crelm toothpaste with the miracle ingredient, Fraudulin. [action] (two cars in bleak landscape) The non-white car represents another toothpaste. [action] (cars race off) Both toothpastes provide 30% protection. [caption] (banner: '60% protection') At 60% protection both toothpastes are doing well. And now at 90% protection the … wait! [action] (grey car stops dead at '90% protection' banner) The non-white car is out, and the Crelm toothpaste goes on to win with 100% protection! Yes, do like all smart motorists. Choose Crelm toothpaste. + +00:02:58.000 --> 00:03:06.000 +[action] Cut to 'Shrill' advertising man. + +00:03:06.000 --> 00:03:18.000 + +Or Shrill Petrol with the new additive GLC 9424075. After 6 p.m., 9424047. Using this white card [action] (half of screen goes white) to represent Shrill's new additive GLC 9424075 - after 6 p.m., 9424047 - we can see how the engine deposits are pushed off the face of the earth by the superior forces available to Shrill. [sfx] (shot, off) Aaaagh! + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_24_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/5_Agatha_Christie_Sketch_(Railway_Timetables).vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_24_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/5_Agatha_Christie_Sketch_(Railway_Timetables).vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..19def49e --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_24_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/5_Agatha_Christie_Sketch_(Railway_Timetables).vtt @@ -0,0 +1,231 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Drawing room murder entwined with rail timetables. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:05.000 +[action] Upper-class drawing room. Elderly man lies dead. Enter Jasmina and John. + +00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:13.000 + +Anyway, John, you can catch the 11.30 from Hornchurch and be in Basingstoke by one o'clock, oh, and there's a buffet car and… [action] (sees corpse) Oh! Daddy! + +00:00:13.000 --> 00:00:16.000 + +My hat! Sir Horace! + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:19.000 + +[action] (not daring to look) Has he been… + +00:00:19.000 --> 00:00:23.000 + +Yes - after breakfast. But that doesn't matter now… he's dead. + +00:00:23.000 --> 00:00:26.000 + +Oh! Poor daddy… + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:29.000 + +Looks like I shan't be catching the 11.30 now. + +00:00:29.000 --> 00:00:32.000 + +Oh no, John, you mustn't miss your train. + +00:00:32.000 --> 00:00:36.000 + +How could I think of catching a train when I should be here helping you? + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:41.000 + +Oh, John, thank you… anyway you could always catch the 9.30 tomorrow - it goes via Caterham and Chipstead. + +00:00:41.000 --> 00:00:43.000 + +Or the 9.45's even better. + +00:00:43.000 --> 00:00:46.000 + +Oh, but you'd have to change at Lambs Green. + +00:00:46.000 --> 00:00:49.000 + +Yes, but there's only a seven-minute wait now. + +00:00:49.000 --> 00:00:53.000 + +Oh, yes, of course, I'd forgotten it was Friday. Oh, who could have done this? + +00:00:53.000 --> 00:00:56.000 +[action] Enter Lady Partridge. + +00:00:56.000 --> 00:01:02.000 + +Oh, do hurry Sir Horace, your train leaves in twenty-eight minutes, and if you miss the 10.15 you won't catch the 3.45 which means … oh! + +00:01:02.000 --> 00:01:05.000 + +I'm afraid Sir Horace won't be catching the 10.15, Lady Partridge. + +00:01:05.000 --> 00:01:07.000 + +Has he been… ? + +00:01:07.000 --> 00:01:09.000 + +Yes - after breakfast. + +00:01:09.000 --> 00:01:12.000 + +Lady Partridge, I'm afraid you can cancel his seat reservation. + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:17.000 + +Oh, and it was back to the engine - fourth coach along so that he could see the gradient signs outside Swanborough. + +00:01:17.000 --> 00:01:20.000 + +Not any more Lady Partridge… the line's been closed. + +00:01:20.000 --> 00:01:22.000 + +Closed! Not Swanborough! + +00:01:22.000 --> 00:01:24.000 + +I'm afraid so. + +00:01:24.000 --> 00:01:27.000 +[action] Enter Inspector Davis. + +00:01:27.000 --> 00:01:31.000 + +All right, nobody move. I'm Inspector Davis of Scotland Yard. + +00:01:31.000 --> 00:01:34.000 + +My word, you were here quickly, inspector. + +00:01:34.000 --> 00:01:39.000 + +Yeah, I got the 8.55 Pullman Express from King's Cross and missed that bit around Hornchurch. + +00:01:39.000 --> 00:01:41.000 + +It's a very good train. + +00:01:41.000 --> 00:01:44.000 + +[dialogue] Excellent, very good, delightful. + +00:01:44.000 --> 00:01:48.000 +[action] Tony runs in through french windows: white flannels, boater; jolly upper-class. + +00:01:48.000 --> 00:01:50.000 + +Hello everyone. + +00:01:50.000 --> 00:01:52.000 + +[dialogue] Tony! + +00:01:52.000 --> 00:01:57.000 + +Where's daddy? [action] (seeing him) Oh golly! Has he been… ? + +00:01:57.000 --> 00:01:59.000 + +Yes, after breakfast. + +00:01:59.000 --> 00:02:02.000 + +Then … he won't be needing his reservation on the 10.15. + +00:02:02.000 --> 00:02:03.500 + +Exactly. + +00:02:03.500 --> 00:02:06.500 + +And I suppose as his eldest son it must go to me. + +00:02:06.500 --> 00:02:09.500 + +Just a minute, Tony. There's a small matter of… murder. + +00:02:09.500 --> 00:02:13.500 + +Oh, but surely he simply shot himself and then hid the gun. + +00:02:13.500 --> 00:02:17.500 + +How could anyone shoot himself and then hide the gun without first cancelling his reservation. + +00:02:17.500 --> 00:02:20.000 + +Ha, ha! Well, I must dash or I'll be late for the 10.15. + +00:02:20.000 --> 00:02:23.000 + +I suggest you murdered your father for his seat reservation. + +00:02:23.000 --> 00:02:29.000 + +I may have had the motive, inspector, but I could not have done it, for I have only just arrived from Gillingham on the 8.13 and here's my restaurant car ticket to prove it. + +00:02:29.000 --> 00:02:31.000 + +The 8.13 from Gillingham doesn't have a restaurant car. + +00:02:31.000 --> 00:02:33.000 + +It's a standing buffet only. + +00:02:33.000 --> 00:02:36.000 + +Oh, er… did I say the 8.13, I meant the 7.58 stopping train. + +00:02:36.000 --> 00:02:40.000 + +But the 7.58 stopping train arrived at Swindon at 8.19 owing to annual point maintenance at Wisborough Junction. + +00:02:40.000 --> 00:02:43.000 + +So how did you make the connection with the 8.13 which left six minutes earlier? + +00:02:43.000 --> 00:02:47.000 + +Oh, er, simple! I caught the 7.16 Football Special arriving at Swindon at 8.09. + +00:02:47.000 --> 00:02:50.000 + +But the 7.16 Football Special only stops at Swindon on alternate Saturdays. + +00:02:50.000 --> 00:02:52.500 + +Yes, surely you mean the Holidaymaker Special. + +00:02:52.500 --> 00:02:57.000 + +Oh, yes! How daft of me. Of course, I came on the Holidaymaker Special calling at Bedford, Colmworth, Fen Dinon, Sutton, Wallington and Gillingham. + +00:02:57.000 --> 00:02:59.000 + +That's Sundays only! + +00:02:59.000 --> 00:03:04.000 + +Damn. All right, I confess I did it. I killed him for his reservation, but you won't take me alive! I'm going to throw myself under the 10.12 from Reading. + +00:03:04.000 --> 00:03:08.000 + +Don't be a fool, Tony, don't do it, the 10.12 has the new narrow traction bogies, you wouldn't stand a chance. + +00:03:08.000 --> 00:03:10.000 + +Exactly. + +00:03:10.000 --> 00:03:14.000 +[action] Tableau. Loud chord and slow curtain. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_24_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/6_Mr_Neville_Shunt.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_24_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/6_Mr_Neville_Shunt.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..e98e46cf --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_24_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/6_Mr_Neville_Shunt.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,42 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Art critic on Shunt; Shunt typing railway onomatopoeia. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:08.000 + +[voiceover] That was an excerpt from the latest West End hit 'It all happened on the 11.20 from Hainault to Redhill via Horsham and Reigate, calling at Carshalton Beeches, Malmesbury, Tooting Bec, and Croydon West'. The author is Mr. Neville Shunt. + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:14.000 +[action] Shunt among railway junk, typing madly. + +00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:24.000 +[caption] (typing) Chuff, chuff, chuffwoooooch, woooooch! Sssssssss, sssssssss! Diddledum, diddledum, diddlealum. Toot, toot. The train now standing at platform eight, tch, tch, tch, diddledum, diddledum. Chuffff chuffffiTff eeeeeeeeeaaaaaaaaa Vooooommmmm. + +00:00:24.000 --> 00:00:26.000 +[caption] SUPER: 'GAVIN MILLARRRRRRRRRR' + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:01:10.000 + +Some people have made the mistake of seeing Shunt's work as a load of rubbish about railway timetables, but clever people like me, who talk loudly in restaurants, see this as a deliberate ambiguity, a plea for understanding in a mechanized world. The points are frozen, the beast is dead. What is the difference? What indeed is the point? The point is frozen, the beast is late out of Paddington. The point is taken. If La Fontaine's elk would spurn Tom Jones the engine must be our head, the dining car our oesophagus, the guard's van our left lung, the cattle truck our shins, the first-class compartment the piece of skin at the nape of the neck and the level crossing an electric elk called Simon. The clarity is devastating. But where is the ambiguity? It's over there in a box. Shunt is saying the 8.15 from Gillingham when in reality he means the 8.13 from Gillingham. The train is the same only the time is altered. Ecce homo, ergo elk. La Fontaine knew his sister and knew her bloody well. The point is taken, the beast is moulting, the fluff gets up your nose. The illusion is complete; it is reality, the reality is illusion and the ambiguity is the only truth. But is the truth, as Hitchcock observes, in the box? No there isn't room, the ambiguity has put on weight. The point is taken, the elk is dead, the beast stops at Swindon, Chabrol stops at nothing, I'm having treatment and La Fontaine can get knotted. + +00:01:10.000 --> 00:01:12.000 +[action] Cut to man at desk. + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:14.000 + +Gavin Millar… + +00:01:14.000 --> 00:01:16.000 +[action] Cut to another man. + +00:01:16.000 --> 00:01:18.000 + +…rrrrrrr… + +00:01:18.000 --> 00:01:26.000 +[action] Back to first man. + +00:01:26.000 --> 00:01:40.000 + +… was not talking to Neville Shunt. From the world of the theatre we turn to the world of dental hygiene. No, no, no, no. From the world of the theatre we move to the silver screen. We honour one of the silver screen's outstanding writer-dentists… writer-directors, Martin Curry who is visiting London to have a tooth out, for the pre-molar, er… premiere of his filling, film next Toothday… Tuesday, at the Dental Theatre… Film Theatre. Martin Curry talking to Matthew Palate… Padget. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_24_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/7_Film_director_(teeth).vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_24_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/7_Film_director_(teeth).vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..5d094885 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_24_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/7_Film_director_(teeth).vtt @@ -0,0 +1,123 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Late-night interview; clip with Julius Caesar; Trafalgar scene; water/straw gag. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 +[action] Late-night line-up setting. Interviewer and interviewee seated. + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:14.000 + +Martin Curry, welcome. One of the big teeth… big points that the American critics made about your latest film, 'The Twelve Caesars', was that it was on so all-embracing a topic. What made you undertake so enormous a tusk… task? + +00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:18.000 +[action] Reveal: interviewee has two enormous front teeth. + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:23.000 + +Well I've always been interested in Imperial Rome from Julius Caesar right through to Vethpathian. + +00:00:23.000 --> 00:00:24.500 + +Who? + +00:00:24.500 --> 00:00:26.500 + +Vethpathian. + +00:00:26.500 --> 00:00:28.500 + +Ah! Vespasian. + +00:00:28.500 --> 00:00:30.000 + +Yes. + +00:00:30.000 --> 00:00:35.000 + +When I saw your film it did seem to me that you had taken a rather, umm, subjective approach to it. + +00:00:35.000 --> 00:00:36.500 + +I'm sorry? + +00:00:36.500 --> 00:00:44.000 + +Well, I mean all your main characters had these enormous … well not enormous, these very big … well let's have a look at a clip in which Julius Incisor …. Caesar talks to his generals during the battle against Caractacus. + +00:00:44.000 --> 00:00:46.000 + +I don't see that at all. + +00:00:46.000 --> 00:00:50.000 +[action] Film: interior of a tent; generals around a table. + +00:00:50.000 --> 00:00:54.000 +[caption] (with relatively enormous front teeth) Shall I order the cavalry that they may hide themselves in the wood, O Caesar? + +00:00:54.000 --> 00:00:56.500 +[caption] (with very large front teeth) Thus O Caesar. + +00:00:56.500 --> 00:01:00.500 +[caption] (with amazingly large front teeth) Today is about to be a triumph for our native country. + +00:01:00.500 --> 00:01:03.500 +[action] Back to interview set. + +00:01:03.500 --> 00:01:08.500 + +Martin Curry, why do all your characters have these very big er … very big um … teeth? + +00:01:08.500 --> 00:01:10.500 + +What do you mean? + +00:01:10.500 --> 00:01:21.000 + +Well, I mean, er… and even in your biblical epic, 'The Son of Man', John the Baptist had the most enormous … dental appendages … and of course … himself had the most monumental ivories. + +00:01:21.000 --> 00:01:26.000 + +No, I'm afraid I don't see that at all. [action] (picks up glass of water but can't reach mouth) Could I have a straw? + +00:01:26.000 --> 00:01:32.000 + +Oh, a straw, yes, yes. Well while we're doing that perhaps we could take another look at an earlier film, 'Trafalgar'. + +00:01:32.000 --> 00:01:36.000 +[action] Between decks. Nelson lying among others. Enormous teeth. + +00:01:36.000 --> 00:01:40.000 + +Cover my coat, Mr Bush, the men must not know of this till victory is ours. + +00:01:40.000 --> 00:01:42.000 + +The surgeon's coming, sir. + +00:01:42.000 --> 00:01:46.000 + +No, tell the surgeon to attend the men that can be saved. He can do little for me, I fear. + +00:01:46.000 --> 00:01:48.000 + +Aye, aye, sir. + +00:01:48.000 --> 00:01:50.000 + +Hardy! Hardy! + +00:01:50.000 --> 00:01:51.500 + +Sir? + +00:01:51.500 --> 00:01:55.000 + +Hardy…kiss… er … put your hand on my thigh. + +00:01:55.000 --> 00:01:59.000 +[action] Back to interview set. Curry nearly upside down, struggling to drink with straw. + +00:01:59.000 --> 00:02:04.000 + +Martin Curry, thank you. Well. We asked the first-night audience what they thought of that film. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_24_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/8_City_gents_vox_pops.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_24_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/8_City_gents_vox_pops.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..9de019fd --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_24_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/8_City_gents_vox_pops.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,76 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Vox pops with exaggerated features; stuck-in-a-rut gag. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:03.000 +[action] Cut to vox pops. + +00:00:03.000 --> 00:00:05.000 + +It wasn't true to life. + +00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:07.000 + +Yes it was. + +00:00:07.000 --> 00:00:09.000 + +No it wasn't. + +00:00:09.000 --> 00:00:12.000 + +I thought it was totally bizarre. + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:20.000 + +Well I've been in the city for over forty years and I think the importance of looking after poor people cannot be understressed. + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:25.000 + +Well I've been in the city for twenty years and I must admit - I'm lost. + +00:00:25.000 --> 00:00:29.000 + +Well, I've been in the city all my life and I'm as alert and active as I've ever been. + +00:00:29.000 --> 00:00:36.000 + +Well I've been in the city since I was two and I certainly wouldn't say that I was stuck in a rut… stuck in a rut … stuck in a rut… stuck in a rut… + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:38.000 + +Oh dear, Mr Bulstrode's stuck again. + +00:00:38.000 --> 00:00:41.000 +[action] She runs over and gives him a shove. + +00:00:41.000 --> 00:00:44.000 + +I certainly wouldn't say that I was stuck in a rut. + +00:00:44.000 --> 00:00:51.000 + +Well l've been in the city for thirty years and I've never once regretted being a nasty, greedy, cold hearted, avaricious, money-grubber … Conservative. + +00:00:51.000 --> 00:00:58.000 + +Well I've been in the city for twenty-seven years and I would like to see the reintroduction of flogging. Every Thursday, round at my place. + +00:00:58.000 --> 00:01:03.000 +[action] Man visible only above sea level. + +00:01:03.000 --> 00:01:06.000 + +Well I've been in the sea for thirty-three years and I've never regretted it. + +00:01:06.000 --> 00:01:12.000 +[action] Camera pulls back: other city gents' heads with bowlers say 'quite agree'. Further pull back: elderly couple in deckchairs. + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:14.500 + +I think it must be a naturalist outing. + +00:01:14.500 --> 00:01:17.500 + +I think it must be one of them crackpot religions. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_24_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/9_'Crackpot_Religions_Ltd'.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_24_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/9_'Crackpot_Religions_Ltd'.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..188a0ea0 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_24_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/9_'Crackpot_Religions_Ltd'.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,149 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Crackpot’s prize religion; comedic denominations montage. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:05.000 +[action] Arthur Crackpot at large curved desk. Sign: 'Crackpot Religions Ltd. Arthur Crackpot President and God (Ltd)'. + +00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:22.000 + +This is an example of the sort of abuse we get all the time from ignorant people. I inherited this religion from my father, an ex-used-car salesman and part-time window-box, and I am very proud to be in charge of the first religion with free gifts. You get this luxury tea-trolley with every new enrollment. [caption] (pictures of free gifts) In addition to this you can win a three-piece lounge suite, this luxury caravan, a weekend for two with Peter Bonetti and tonights star prize, the entire Norwich City Council. + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:27.000 +[action] Curtains up reveal council. Audience 'ooh'. Bad organ chords played by a nude man. + +00:00:27.000 --> 00:00:32.000 + +And remember with only eight scoring draws you can win a bishopric in a see of your own choice. You see we have a much more modern approach to religion. + +00:00:32.000 --> 00:00:41.000 +[action] Person in church walks past pillar, puts money in collecting box labeled 'For the rich'. Money travels via pipes; tinkles into Crackpot's ashtray. He tries money with teeth, pockets it, continues reading. + +00:00:41.000 --> 00:00:46.000 + +Blessed is Arthur Crackpot and all his subsidiaries Ltd. You see, in our Church we have a lot more fun. + +00:00:46.000 --> 00:00:55.000 +[action] Priest with pepperpot. + +00:00:55.000 --> 00:01:08.000 + +Oh, Mrs Collins, you did say you were nervous, didn't you? You have eyes on the coffee machine? + +00:01:08.000 --> 00:01:12.000 + +I don't mind, I don't mind - it's just nice to be here, Reverend. + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:26.000 + +[action] (slaps her) Archdeacon! You asked for the coffee machine … so lets see what you've won. You chose Hymn no. 437. [action] (removes number; reads back) Oh, Mrs Collins, you had eyes on the coffee machine. Well you have won tonight's star prize: the entire Norwich City Council. + +00:01:26.000 --> 00:01:30.000 +[caption] Organ music, 'oohs' and applause. + +00:01:30.000 --> 00:01:33.000 + +I've got one already. [action] (priest starts to throttle her) + +00:01:33.000 --> 00:01:39.000 +[action] Back to Crackpot in office. + +00:01:39.000 --> 00:02:00.000 + +A lot of religions - no names no pack drill - do go for the poorer type of person - face it, there's more of 'em - poor people, thieves, villains, poor people without no money at all - well we don't have none of that. Rich people and crumpet over sixteen can enter free: upper middle class quite welcome; lower middle class not under five grand a year. Lower class - I can't touch it. There's no return on it, you see. + +00:02:00.000 --> 00:02:04.000 +[action] Pull back: interviewer sitting at his side. + +00:02:04.000 --> 00:02:07.000 + +Do you have any difficulty converting people? + +00:02:07.000 --> 00:02:10.000 + +Oh no, well we have ways of making them join. + +00:02:10.000 --> 00:02:13.000 +[caption] SUPER: 'THE BISHOP OF DULWICH' (photo) + +00:02:13.000 --> 00:02:20.000 + +Norman there does a lot of converting: a lot of protection, that sort of thing. And there's his mate, Bruce Beer. + +00:02:20.000 --> 00:02:24.000 +[caption] Photo of Aussie bishop with beer can. SUPER: 'THE ARCHBISHOP OF AUSTRALIA' + +00:02:24.000 --> 00:02:34.000 + +Brucie has personally converted ninety-two people twenty-five inside the distance. Then again we're not afraid to use more modern methods. + +00:02:34.000 --> 00:02:40.000 +[action] Pin-up of bikinied 'Bishop Sarah' on beach with mitre and Bible. Headline: 'North See Gas'. + +00:02:40.000 --> 00:02:52.000 + +Sarah, today's diocesan lovely is enough to make any chap go down on his knees. This twenty-three-year-old bishop hails appropriately enough from Bishop's Stortford and lists her hobbies as swimming, riding, and film producers. What a gas! Bet she's no novice when it comes to converting all in her See. + +00:02:52.000 --> 00:02:56.000 +[caption] SUPER: 'ARCHBISHOP GUMBY' + +00:02:56.000 --> 00:03:03.000 + +[dialogue] (shouting laboriously) Basically, I believe in peace and bashing two bricks together. [action] (bashes bricks) + +00:03:03.000 --> 00:03:08.000 +[action] Cut to John Lennon. + +00:03:08.000 --> 00:03:11.000 + +I'm starting a war for peace. + +00:03:11.000 --> 00:03:16.000 +[caption] SUPER: 'ARCHBISHOP SHABBY' + +00:03:16.000 --> 00:03:19.000 + +Cor blimey. I'm raising polecats for peace. + +00:03:19.000 --> 00:03:24.000 +[caption] SUPER: 'ARCHBISHOP NUDGE' + +00:03:24.000 --> 00:03:30.000 + +Peace? I like a peace. Know what I mean? Know what I mean? Say no more. Nudge, nudge. + +00:03:30.000 --> 00:03:36.000 +[action] Bishop with sign 'Naughty Religion'. + +00:03:36.000 --> 00:03:45.000 + +Our religion is the first Church to cater for the naughty type of person. If you'd like a bit of 'love-your-neighbour' - and who doesn't now and again - then see Vera and Ciceley during the hymns. + +00:03:45.000 --> 00:03:51.000 +[action] Wide-boy Pope with small moustache and kipper tie. Sign: 'No Questions Asked Religion'. + +00:03:51.000 --> 00:04:00.000 + +In our Church we try to help people to help themselves - to cars, washing machines, lead piping, no questions asked. We are the only Church, apart from the Baptists, to do respray jobs. + +00:04:00.000 --> 00:04:05.000 +[action] Loony with axe in head. Sign: 'The Lunatic Religion'. + +00:04:05.000 --> 00:04:10.000 + +We at the Church of the Divine Loony believe in the power of prayer to turn the head purple ha, ha, ha. + +00:04:10.000 --> 00:04:15.000 +[action] Normal looking priest. Sign: 'The Most Popular Religion Ltd'. + +00:04:15.000 --> 00:04:27.000 + +I would like to come in here for a moment if I may, and disassociate our Church from these frivolous and offensive religions. We are primarily concerned with what is best… [sfx] (phone rings; answers) Hello. Oh, well how about Allied Breweries? All right, but keep the Rio Tinto [action] (puts phone down) … for the human soul. + +00:04:27.000 --> 00:04:34.000 +[caption] ANIMATION: a vicar c/o Terry Gilliam. CAPTION: 'CARTOON RELIGIONS LTD' + +00:04:34.000 --> 00:04:44.000 + +In our Church we believe first and foremost in you. [action] (smiles; top of head comes off; Devil tries to climb out; vicar replaces head) We want you to think of us as your friend. [action] (vicar nails top of head on) + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_25_-_Episode_Twenty-five/0_Episode25_head_tail.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_25_-_Episode_Twenty-five/0_Episode25_head_tail.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..8baa4b25 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_25_-_Episode_Twenty-five/0_Episode25_head_tail.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,37 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Intro titles, linking captions, and end credits for Episode 25 + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:03.500 +[action] Close-up of a flag bearing a black eagle on a red background fluttering in the wind; blue sky and scudding clouds; buccaneer adventure music. + +00:00:03.500 --> 00:00:10.000 +[caption] THE BLACK EAGLE — CAST and credits roll (Black Eagle: Thornton Welles; Meg Fairweather: Kate Tamblying; Jack Fairweather: Owen Tregower; Henry Fairweather: Russ Tempole Jnr.; Mrs Fairweather: Alice Shoemaker; Dr Tennyson: Marshall M. West; Lumpkin: Dino De Vere; Mr Rivers: Walter Schenkel; Lt Staveacre: Norman S. Hughes; A Wench: Marsha Sutton; Second Wench: Tinea Pedis; The Dog: Karl; Screenplay: Al R. Schroeder & Wayne Kopit; Based on 'The Blue Eagle' by Rafael Sabatini; Set decoration: Cy Borgini; Make-up: Bruce Dilkes; Costumes: Joan Louis; Unit Manager: Trevor Belowski; Continuity: Sue Carpenter; Special Effects: Walter Schenkel; Miss Tamblying’s gowns by Hepworths; Colour by Chromacolour; Sound recording WCA System; Copyright by Schenkel Productions; Any similarity between persons living or dead is coincidental; Produced by Joseph M. Schlack; Directed by Lauren F. Norder). + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:16.000 +[action] Mix through from flag to sea at night; muffled oars approaching; signal flashes from cliff; pirates beach a rowing boat and begin unloading sacks and chests. + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:23.000 +[caption] IN 1742 THE SPANISH EMPIRE LAY IN RUINS... TREASURE OF THE SPANISH MAIN WAS BROUGHT HOME TO THE SHORES OF ENGLAND. + +00:00:23.000 --> 00:00:26.000 + +And now for something completely different… + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:27.500 + +It's… + +00:23:30.000 --> 00:23:35.000 +[caption] IN 1970 MONTY PYTHON'S FLYING CIRCUS LAY IN RUINS, AND THEN THE WORDS ON THE SCREEN SAID: + +00:23:35.000 --> 00:24:20.000 +[caption] END CREDITS: MONTY PYTHON'S FLYING CIRCUS — WAS CONCEIVED, WRITTEN AND SPAM PERFORMED BY: Terry Jones; Michael Palin; John Cleese; Graham Chapman; Eric Idle; Terry Gilliam; Also appearing: The Fred Tomlinson Singers; Research: Patricia Houlihan; Makeup: Penny Norton; Costumes: Hazel Pethig; Animations: Terry Gilliam; Film Cameraman: James Balfour; Film Editor: Ray Millichope; Sound: Peter Rose; Lighting: Otis Eddy; Designer: Robert Berk; Produced by Ian MacNaughton; BBC TV. With comedic SPAM insertions as displayed. + +00:24:20.000 --> 00:24:28.000 + +Haagbard Etheldronga and his Viking hordes are currently appearing in 'Grin and Pillage it' at the Jodrell Theatre, Colwyn Bay. 'The Dirty Hungarian Phrase Book' is available from Her Majesty's Stationery Office, price - a kiss on the bum. + +00:24:28.000 --> 00:24:33.000 +[action] Fade in: Karl Marx and Che Guevara lying post-coitally in bed. Karl switches off the light. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_25_-_Episode_Twenty-five/10_Spam.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_25_-_Episode_Twenty-five/10_Spam.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..27c22240 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_25_-_Episode_Twenty-five/10_Spam.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,160 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Vikings in a cafe sing about spam; Hungarian cameo; historian coda + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 +[action] Cafe interior; customers are Vikings. Mr and Mrs Bun descend on wires. + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:05.500 + +Morning + +00:00:05.500 --> 00:00:06.500 + +Morning + +00:00:06.500 --> 00:00:08.500 + +What have you got, then? + +00:00:08.500 --> 00:00:20.000 + +Well, there's egg and bacon; egg sausage and bacon; egg and spam; egg, bacon and spam; egg, bacon, sausage and spam; spam, bacon, sausage and spam; spam, egg, spam, spam, bacon and spam; spam, spam, spam, egg and spam; spam, spam, spam, spam, spam, spam, baked beans, spam, spam, spam and spam; or Lobster thermidor aux crevettes with a mornay sauce garnished with truffle pâté, brandy and with a fried egg on top and spam. + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:22.500 + +Have you got anything without spam in it? + +00:00:22.500 --> 00:00:25.000 + +Well, there's spam egg sausage and spam, that's not got much spam in it. + +00:00:25.000 --> 00:00:26.500 + +I don't want ANY spam! + +00:00:26.500 --> 00:00:29.000 + +Why can't she have egg, bacon, spam and sausage? + +00:00:29.000 --> 00:00:30.500 + +That's got spam in it! + +00:00:30.500 --> 00:00:33.000 + +Not as much as spam, egg, sausage and spam. + +00:00:33.000 --> 00:00:36.000 + +Look, could I have egg, bacon, spam and sausage without the spam. + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:37.500 + +Uuuuuuggggh! + +00:00:37.500 --> 00:00:40.000 + +What d'you mean uuugggh! I don't like spam + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:46.000 +[caption] (Vikings singing) Spam, spam, spam, spam, spam… spam, spam, spam, spam… lovely spam, wonderful spam… + +00:00:46.000 --> 00:00:48.000 +[action] Brief stock shot of a Viking ship. + +00:00:48.000 --> 00:00:50.500 + +Shut up. Shut up! Shut up! You can't have egg, bacon, spam and sausage without the spam. + +00:00:50.500 --> 00:00:51.800 + +Why not! + +00:00:51.800 --> 00:00:54.000 + +No, it wouldn't be egg, bacon, spam and sausage, would it. + +00:00:54.000 --> 00:00:55.500 + +I don't like spam! + +00:00:55.500 --> 00:00:59.000 + +Don't make a fuss, dear. I'll have your spam. I love it. I'm having spam, spam, spam, spam, spam… + +00:00:59.000 --> 00:01:02.000 +[caption] (Vikings singing) Spam, spam, spam, spam… + +00:01:02.000 --> 00:01:04.000 + +… baked beans, spam, spam and spam. + +00:01:04.000 --> 00:01:05.500 + +Baked beans are off. + +00:01:05.500 --> 00:01:07.000 + +Well can I have spam instead? + +00:01:07.000 --> 00:01:10.000 + +You mean spam, spam, spam, spam, spam, spam, spam, spam, spam, spam? + +00:01:10.000 --> 00:01:13.000 +[caption] (Vikings still singing) Spam, spam, spam, spam… + +00:01:13.000 --> 00:01:14.500 + +Yes. + +00:01:14.500 --> 00:01:15.800 + +Arrggh! + +00:01:15.800 --> 00:01:18.000 + +.. . lovely spam, wonderful, spam. + +00:01:18.000 --> 00:01:19.500 + +Shut up! Shut up! + +00:01:19.500 --> 00:01:22.000 +[action] The Vikings hush; Hungarian enters. + +00:01:22.000 --> 00:01:26.000 + +Great boobies, honeybun, my lower intestine is full of spam, egg, spam, bacon, spam, tomato, spam… + +00:01:26.000 --> 00:01:28.000 +[caption] (Vikings start up) Spam, spam, spam, spam… + +00:01:28.000 --> 00:01:29.500 + +Shut up + +00:01:29.500 --> 00:01:32.000 +[action] Policeman rushes in and bundles Hungarian out. + +00:01:32.000 --> 00:01:33.500 + +My nipples explode… + +00:01:33.500 --> 00:01:36.000 +[caption] A HISTORIAN + +00:01:36.000 --> 00:01:45.000 + +Another great Viking victory was at the Green Midget cafe at Bromley... [indicates map] assembled at Trondheim... Once in Bromley they assembled in the Green Midget cafe and spam selecting a spam particular spam item from the spam menu would spam, spam, spam, spam, spam… + +00:01:45.000 --> 00:01:49.000 +[action] Backdrop rises to reveal the cafe; Vikings sing; historian conducts. + +00:01:49.000 --> 00:01:55.000 +[caption] (Vikings singing) Spam, spam, spam, spam, spam, lovely spam, wonderful spam. Lovely spam, wonderful spam… + +00:01:55.000 --> 00:01:58.000 +[action] Mr and Mrs Bun rise slowly in the air. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_25_-_Episode_Twenty-five/1_The_Black_Eagle.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_25_-_Episode_Twenty-five/1_The_Black_Eagle.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..4838c3a4 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_25_-_Episode_Twenty-five/1_The_Black_Eagle.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,24 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Parody film opening leading into 'and now for something completely different' + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:05.000 +[action] Flag with black eagle flutters; buccaneer music swells. + +00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:12.000 +[caption] THE BLACK EAGLE — extensive spoof cast and credits roll. + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:17.500 +[action] Night sea; muffled oars; signal flashes from cliff; pirates beach the boat and unload treasure. + +00:00:17.500 --> 00:00:23.000 +[caption] IN 1742 THE SPANISH EMPIRE LAY IN RUINS... TREASURE OF THE SPANISH MAIN WAS BROUGHT HOME TO ENGLAND. + +00:00:23.000 --> 00:00:26.000 + +And now for something completely different… + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:27.500 + +It's… + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_25_-_Episode_Twenty-five/2_Dirty_Hungarian_phrasebook.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_25_-_Episode_Twenty-five/2_Dirty_Hungarian_phrasebook.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..dd2fae98 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_25_-_Episode_Twenty-five/2_Dirty_Hungarian_phrasebook.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,115 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Tobacconist scene with Hungarian using mistranslated phrasebook + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:03.000 +[action] Animated titles end; interior of small tobacconist’s shop; tobacconist hands change to a fireman. + +00:00:03.000 --> 00:00:07.000 + +Thank you very much for the change, Mr Tobacconist. [off, loudly] Was that all right? + +00:00:07.000 --> 00:00:08.500 +[caption] SSSh! + +00:00:08.500 --> 00:00:15.000 +[caption] IN 1970, THE BRITISH EMPIRE LAY IN RUINS... MANY OF THESE HUNGARIANS WENT INTO TOBACCONISTS’ SHOPS TO BUY CIGARETTES… + +00:00:15.000 --> 00:00:18.500 +[action] Hungarian gentleman enters with phrasebook, searching for phrases. + +00:00:18.500 --> 00:00:21.500 + +I will not buy this record, it is scratched. + +00:00:21.500 --> 00:00:23.000 + +Sorry? + +00:00:23.000 --> 00:00:25.500 + +I will not buy this record, it is scratched. + +00:00:25.500 --> 00:00:28.000 + +No, no, no. This… tobacconist's. + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:31.000 + +Ah! I will not buy this tobacconist's, it is scratched. + +00:00:31.000 --> 00:00:34.000 + +No, no, no… tobacco… er, cigarettes? + +00:00:34.000 --> 00:00:37.000 + +Yes, cigarettes. My hovercraft is full of eels. + +00:00:37.000 --> 00:00:38.500 + +What? + +00:00:38.500 --> 00:00:41.000 +[action] Mimes striking matches: My hovercraft is full of eels. + +00:00:41.000 --> 00:00:43.000 + +Matches, matches? + +00:00:43.000 --> 00:00:49.000 + +Yah, yah. [action] Takes cigarettes and matches; consults book. Er, do you want… do you want to come back to my place, bouncy bouncy? + +00:00:49.000 --> 00:00:51.500 + +I don't think you're using that right. + +00:00:51.500 --> 00:00:53.500 + +You great pouf. + +00:00:53.500 --> 00:00:56.000 + +That'll be six and six, please. + +00:00:56.000 --> 00:01:00.500 + +If I said you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me? I am no longer infected. + +00:01:00.500 --> 00:01:05.500 +[action] Mimes to see book; takes phrasebook. It costs six and six… [mumbling while searching] costs six and six… Here we are… Yandelvayasna grldenwi stravenka. + +00:01:05.500 --> 00:01:10.000 +[action] Hungarian punches tobacconist between the eyes; cutaway: policeman hears, then sprints through streets to shop and enters. + +00:01:10.000 --> 00:01:12.500 + +What's going on here then? + +00:01:12.500 --> 00:01:15.000 +[action] Opens book and points at tobacconist. You have beautiful thighs. + +00:01:15.000 --> 00:01:16.500 + +What? + +00:01:16.500 --> 00:01:18.000 + +He hit me. + +00:01:18.000 --> 00:01:21.000 + +Drop your panties, Sir William, I cannot wait till lunchtime. + +00:01:21.000 --> 00:01:23.000 + +Right! + +00:01:23.000 --> 00:01:25.000 +[action] Drags Hungarian out. + +00:01:25.000 --> 00:01:27.000 + +My nipples explode with delight. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_25_-_Episode_Twenty-five/3_Court_(phrasebook).vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_25_-_Episode_Twenty-five/3_Court_(phrasebook).vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..8cdf533c --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_25_-_Episode_Twenty-five/3_Court_(phrasebook).vtt @@ -0,0 +1,159 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Courtroom trial of the phrasebook publisher + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:02.500 +[action] Cut to a courtroom. + +00:00:02.500 --> 00:00:04.500 + +Call Alexander Yahlt + +00:00:04.500 --> 00:00:08.500 +[caption] Voices (in harmony): Call Alexander Yahlt. (three times) + +00:00:08.500 --> 00:00:10.500 + +Oh, shut up. + +00:00:10.500 --> 00:00:12.500 + +You are Alexander Yahlt? + +00:00:12.500 --> 00:00:15.000 +[caption] (Derek Nimmo's voice, dubbed) Oh I am. + +00:00:15.000 --> 00:00:17.500 + +Skip the impersonations. You are Alexander Yahlt? + +00:00:17.500 --> 00:00:19.000 + +I am. + +00:00:19.000 --> 00:00:26.000 + +You are hereby charged that on the 28th day of May 1970, you did wilfully, unlawfully, and with malice aforethought publish an alleged English-Hungarian phrasebook with intent to cause a breach of the peace. How do you plead? + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:27.500 + +Not guilty. + +00:00:27.500 --> 00:00:29.500 + +You live at 46, Horton Terrace? + +00:00:29.500 --> 00:00:31.000 + +I do live at 46, Horton Terrace. + +00:00:31.000 --> 00:00:33.000 + +You are the director of a publishing company? + +00:00:33.000 --> 00:00:34.500 + +I am the director of a publishing company. + +00:00:34.500 --> 00:00:36.500 + +Your company publishes phrasebooks? + +00:00:36.500 --> 00:00:38.000 + +My company does publish phrasebooks. + +00:00:38.000 --> 00:00:40.500 + +You did say 46, Horton Terrace, didn't you? + +00:00:40.500 --> 00:00:41.500 + +Yes. + +00:00:41.500 --> 00:00:44.000 +[action] Yahlt claps hand to mouth; gong; general applause. + +00:00:44.000 --> 00:00:46.000 + +Ha, ha, ha, I got him. + +00:00:46.000 --> 00:00:48.000 + +Get on with it! Get on with it! + +00:00:48.000 --> 00:00:51.000 + +Yes, m'lud, on the 28th of May, you published this phrasebook. + +00:00:51.000 --> 00:00:52.500 + +I did. + +00:00:52.500 --> 00:00:58.000 + +I quote an example. The Hungarian phrase meaning 'Can you direct me to the station?' is translated by the English phrase, 'Please fondle my bum'. + +00:00:58.000 --> 00:01:00.000 + +I wish to plead incompetence. + +00:01:00.000 --> 00:01:03.000 +[action] Policeman stands. + +00:01:03.000 --> 00:01:05.000 + +Please may I ask for an adjournment, m'lud? + +00:01:05.000 --> 00:01:10.000 + +An adjournment? Certainly not. [action] Policeman sits; loud raspberry; he reddens. Why on earth didn't you say why you wanted an adjournment? + +00:01:10.000 --> 00:01:12.000 + +I didn't know an acceptable legal phrase, m'lud. + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:15.000 +[action] Stock film: Women's Institute applauding. + +00:01:15.000 --> 00:01:17.500 + +If there's any more stock film of women applauding, I'll clear the court. + +00:01:17.500 --> 00:01:19.500 + +Call Abigail Tesler + +00:01:19.500 --> 00:01:24.500 +[action] Two policemen carry in a full-size photo blow-up 'Sunshine Sizzler' and prop her in the witness box. + +00:01:24.500 --> 00:01:26.500 + +M'lud - this is Abigail Tesler. + +00:01:26.500 --> 00:01:27.500 + +Is it? + +00:01:27.500 --> 00:01:35.000 + +Yes, m'lud. Twenty-three-year-old Abigail hails from down under, where they're upside down about her... So watch out for sharks, Abigail! + +00:01:35.000 --> 00:01:41.000 +[action] Cut: judge becomes door-sized 'Legal Sizzler' photo blow-up. + +00:01:41.000 --> 00:01:47.000 + +[voice over] Is this strictly relevant? Quizzed learned lovely, Justice Maltravers... (Defence becomes 'Defence Counsel Sizzler'). + +00:01:47.000 --> 00:01:52.000 + +All will be revealed soon m'lud, quipped tall forty-two-year-old Nelson Bedowes... + +00:01:52.000 --> 00:01:58.000 +[animation] Judge in dark glasses with starlet at London airport; 'on his way to judge for Britain at the famous International Court in the Hague…' + +00:01:58.000 --> 00:02:00.000 + +Get off! + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_25_-_Episode_Twenty-five/4_Communist_quiz_(World_Forum).vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_25_-_Episode_Twenty-five/4_Communist_quiz_(World_Forum).vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..dd841853 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_25_-_Episode_Twenty-five/4_Communist_quiz_(World_Forum).vtt @@ -0,0 +1,72 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Game show with Marx, Lenin, Che, and Mao + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:03.000 +[caption] WORLD FORUM + +00:00:03.000 --> 00:00:09.000 +[action] Current affairs set with huge 'World Forum' letters; the presenter introduces guests seated at desks. + +00:00:09.000 --> 00:00:30.000 + +Good evening. Tonight is indeed a unique occasion... Karl Marx... Lenin... Che Guevara... and Mao Tse-tung... And the first question is for you, Karl Marx. The Hammers — the nickname of what English football team? + +00:00:30.000 --> 00:00:34.000 +[action] Karl furrows brow; stumped. + +00:00:34.000 --> 00:00:43.000 + +No? Bad luck there, Karl. Che Guevara — Coventry City last won the FA Cup in what year? ... No? Trick question: Coventry City have never won the FA Cup. With the scores equal, second round. Lenin, starter for ten: Teddy Johnson and Pearl Carr won Eurovision in 1959. Name the song? + +00:00:43.000 --> 00:00:45.500 +[action] Buzzer. Zoom in on Mao. + +00:00:45.500 --> 00:00:47.500 + +Sing Little Birdie? + +00:00:47.500 --> 00:00:52.000 + +Yes it was indeed. Well challenged. [applause] Now our special gift section. Contestant: Karl Marx. Prize: a beautiful lounge suite. + +00:00:52.000 --> 00:00:56.000 +[action] Curtains open revealing lounge suite; audience applauds; Karl stands in front, nervous. + +00:00:56.000 --> 00:01:02.000 + +Karl has elected 'workers' control of factories'. Q1: The development of the industrial proletariat is conditioned by what other development? + +00:01:02.000 --> 00:01:04.500 + +The development of the industrial bourgeoisie. + +00:01:04.500 --> 00:01:07.500 + +Yes, yes! Q2: The struggle of class against class is a what struggle? + +00:01:07.500 --> 00:01:09.500 + +A political struggle. + +00:01:09.500 --> 00:01:11.500 +[caption] Tumultuous applause. + +00:01:11.500 --> 00:01:16.500 + +Final question for the lounge suite, Karl: Who won the Cup Final in 1949? + +00:01:16.500 --> 00:01:20.500 + +The workers' control of the means of production? The struggle of the urban proletariat? + +00:01:20.500 --> 00:01:23.000 + +No. Wolverhampton Wanderers beat Leicester 3-1. + +00:01:23.000 --> 00:01:28.000 +[action] Stock film: goal scored; roaring crowd; cheering supporters. + +00:01:28.000 --> 00:01:33.000 +[caption] IN WORLD FORUM TODAY: KARL MARX, CHE GUEVARA, LENIN AND MAO TSE-TUNG. NEXT WEEK, FOUR LEADING HEADS OF STATE OF THE AFRO-ASIAN NATIONS AGAINST BRISTOL ROVERS AT MOLINEUX. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_25_-_Episode_Twenty-five/5_'Ypres_1914'_-_abandoned.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_25_-_Episode_Twenty-five/5_'Ypres_1914'_-_abandoned.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..9e687112 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_25_-_Episode_Twenty-five/5_'Ypres_1914'_-_abandoned.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,65 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE First failed attempt at the Ypres trench sketch, interrupted by floor manager and miscues + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 +[animation] First World War trench scene — barbed wire silhouette; helmet on bayonet. + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:10.000 +[caption] IN 1914, THE BALANCE OF POWER LAY IN RUINS... (descends into childish scrawl) PHILLIPS IS A GERMAN AND HE HAVE MY PEN. + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:12.500 +[caption] START AGAIN. + +00:00:12.500 --> 00:00:15.000 +[caption] IN 1914, THE BALANCE OF POWER LAY IN RUINS… + +00:00:15.000 --> 00:00:20.000 +[action] Close-up of harmonica played by British Tommy; pull out to bunker interior with motley crowd (padre with no arms, sheikh, Viking, male mermaid, nun, milkman, Greek Orthodox priest) amid shellfire. + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:22.500 + +Jenkins? + +00:00:22.500 --> 00:00:25.500 +[caption] (awkward) Yes, sir. + +00:00:25.500 --> 00:00:28.000 + +What are you going to do when you get back to Blighty? + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:32.000 + +I dunno, sarge… I expect I'll be looking after me mum. She'll be getting on a bit now. + +00:00:32.000 --> 00:00:34.000 + +Got a family of your own 'ave you? + +00:00:34.000 --> 00:00:38.000 + +No, she's… she's all I got left now. My wife, Doreen… she… I got a letter. + +00:00:38.000 --> 00:00:39.500 + +You don't have to tell me, son. + +00:00:39.500 --> 00:00:42.500 + +No, sarge, I'd like to tell you, see this place… + +00:00:42.500 --> 00:00:46.000 +[action] Floor manager strides on: 'Hold it. Anyone not involved please leave the set.' He herds out sheikh, male mermaid, etc. Resets and cues. + +00:00:46.000 --> 00:00:49.000 +[caption] KNICKERS 1914 + +00:00:49.000 --> 00:00:52.000 +[action] Floor manager rushes in again: 'Who changed the caption?' + +00:00:52.000 --> 00:00:54.000 +[caption] YPRES 1914 + +00:00:54.000 --> 00:00:59.000 +[action] Floor manager drags a stray spaceman off set; decides to abandon and cut elsewhere. Accidental cut to Che Guevara in embrace with Karl Marx; correction to camera four. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_25_-_Episode_Twenty-five/6_Art_gallery_strike.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_25_-_Episode_Twenty-five/6_Art_gallery_strike.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..f9bf84e8 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_25_-_Episode_Twenty-five/6_Art_gallery_strike.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,147 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Paintings go on strike; characters leave their frames + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 +[action] Art Gallery: sign reads 'Italian Masters of the Renaissance'; two critics tour; stop at a large Titian. + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:08.000 + +Aren't they marvelous? The strength and boldness… life and power in those colours. + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:10.500 + +This must be Titian's masterpiece. + +00:00:10.500 --> 00:00:14.500 + +Oh indeed—if only for the composition alone. The strength of those foreground figures… the firmness of the line… + +00:00:14.500 --> 00:00:17.000 + +Yes, the confidence of the master at the height of his powers. + +00:00:17.000 --> 00:00:23.000 +[action] Country bumpkin arrives; presses painted nipple like a doorbell (ding-dong); waits. A cherub from the painting answers an unseen door. + +00:00:23.000 --> 00:00:24.500 + +Yes? + +00:00:24.500 --> 00:00:27.000 + +Hello sonny, your dad in? + +00:00:27.000 --> 00:00:28.500 + +Yes. + +00:00:28.500 --> 00:00:32.000 + +Could I speak to him please? It's the man from 'The Hay Wain'. + +00:00:32.000 --> 00:00:33.500 + +Who? + +00:00:33.500 --> 00:00:36.500 + +The man from 'The Hay Wain' by Constable. + +00:00:36.500 --> 00:00:39.000 + +Dad… it's the man from 'The Hay Wain' by Constable to see you. + +00:00:39.000 --> 00:00:40.500 + +Coming. + +00:00:40.500 --> 00:00:45.000 +[action] Main figure disappears from painting; opens door to the bumpkin. + +00:00:45.000 --> 00:00:47.500 + +Hello? How are you? Come on in. + +00:00:47.500 --> 00:00:49.500 + +No, no can't stop, just passing by, actually. + +00:00:49.500 --> 00:00:51.000 + +Oh, where are you now? + +00:00:51.000 --> 00:00:58.000 + +Well may you ask. We just been moved in next to a room full of Brueghels… terrible bloody din. Skating all hours. Anyway, there's been a walk-out in the Impressionists. + +00:00:58.000 --> 00:00:59.500 + +Walk-out, eh? + +00:00:59.500 --> 00:01:06.000 + +Yeah… Impressionists are all out. Gainsborough's Blue Boy's brought out the 18th-century English portraits, Flemish School's solid, German woodcuts meeting now. + +00:01:06.000 --> 00:01:08.000 + +Right. Then I'll get the Renaissance School out. + +00:01:08.000 --> 00:01:10.000 + +OK, meeting 4.30 — 'Bridge at Arles'. + +00:01:10.000 --> 00:01:12.000 + +OK, cheerio — good luck, son. + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:13.500 + +OK. + +00:01:13.500 --> 00:01:16.000 +[action] Door shuts; Solomon (V.O.): 'Right — everybody out.' + +00:01:16.000 --> 00:01:19.000 +[action] Various famous paintings empty as characters leave frames. + +00:01:19.000 --> 00:01:21.500 + +I'm off. I'm off. I'm off, dear. + +00:01:21.500 --> 00:01:26.000 +[action] Mix to suburban front room: a man saws his wife in two in a long box; radio newscast plays. + +00:01:26.000 --> 00:01:35.000 + +Here is the News… By an almost unanimous vote, paintings in the National Gallery voted to continue the strike... Sir Kenneth Clarke said he will talk to any painting to bring a speedy end... + +00:01:35.000 --> 00:01:38.000 +[action] Ghastly scream off; sawing stops abruptly; cut to Sotheby’s auction. + +00:01:38.000 --> 00:01:41.000 + +What am I bid for Vermeer's 'Lady Who Used to be at a Window'? Do I hear two bob? + +00:01:41.000 --> 00:01:42.500 + +Two bob! + +00:01:42.500 --> 00:01:45.000 + +Gone. Now what am I bid for another great bargain? Edward Landseer's 'Nothing at Bay'. + +00:01:45.000 --> 00:01:49.000 +[action] Pull out to reveal stag missing; cut to Botticelli's Venus and others crowding camera. + +00:01:49.000 --> 00:01:51.500 + +All we bloody want is a little bit of bloody consultation. + +00:01:51.500 --> 00:01:57.000 +[action] Their shouting fades; radio fades up over montage. + +00:01:57.000 --> 00:02:08.000 + +At a mass meeting at Brentford Football Ground, other works of art voted to come out in support... The vote was unanimous, with one abstention. Meanwhile at Television Centre work began again on a sketch about Ypres… expected to be more sensible this time. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_25_-_Episode_Twenty-five/7_'Ypres_1914'.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_25_-_Episode_Twenty-five/7_'Ypres_1914'.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..6cad2ae7 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_25_-_Episode_Twenty-five/7_'Ypres_1914'.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,150 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Second attempt at the Ypres trench sketch; ration problem and over-acting padre to hospital + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 +[caption] YPRES 1914 + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:07.000 +[action] Close-up harmonica; zoom to bunker with proper WWI cast only. + +00:00:07.000 --> 00:00:08.500 + +Jenkins. + +00:00:08.500 --> 00:00:10.000 + +Yes, sarge? + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:12.000 + +What are you going to do when you get back to Blighty? + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:14.500 + +I dunno, sarge. I expect I'll look after my mum. She'll be getting on a bit now. + +00:00:14.500 --> 00:00:16.000 + +Got a family of your own, have you? + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:18.500 + +No—she's all I got left now. My wife, Doreen… she… I got a letter. + +00:00:18.500 --> 00:00:20.000 + +You don't have to tell me, son. + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:22.500 + +No, sarge, I'd like to tell you. You see, this bloke from up the street… + +00:00:22.500 --> 00:00:26.000 +[action] A young Major enters. + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:28.000 + +OK, chaps, at ease. I've just been up the line… + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:29.500 + +Can we get through, sir? + +00:00:29.500 --> 00:00:31.500 + +No, I'm afraid we'll have to make a break for it at nightfall. + +00:00:31.500 --> 00:00:33.000 + +Right, sir. We're all with yer. + +00:00:33.000 --> 00:00:36.000 + +Yes I know, that's just the problem, sergeant. How many are there of us? + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:39.000 + +Well there's you, me, Jenkins, Padre, Kipper, there's five, sir. + +00:00:39.000 --> 00:00:40.500 + +And only rations for… + +00:00:40.500 --> 00:00:41.500 + +Four, sir. + +00:00:41.500 --> 00:00:44.000 + +Precisely. I'm afraid one of us will have to take the 'other' way out. + +00:00:44.000 --> 00:00:47.000 +[action] Crash zoom to revolver; tense music; faces exchange looks. + +00:00:47.000 --> 00:00:49.000 + +I'm a gonner, major. Leave me, I'm… I'm not a complete man anymore. + +00:00:49.000 --> 00:00:51.000 + +You've lost both your arms as well. + +00:00:51.000 --> 00:00:52.500 + +Yes. Damn silly really. + +00:00:52.500 --> 00:00:55.000 + +No, no, we'll draw for it. That's the way we do things in the army. Sergeant, the straws! + +00:00:55.000 --> 00:00:58.000 +[action] Straws dealt; everyone draws long; Major left with tiny straw. + +00:00:58.000 --> 00:01:00.000 + +Looks like you, sir. + +00:01:00.000 --> 00:01:10.000 + +Is it? What did we say, the longest straw was it? ... Best of three? ... Right, well I've got the shortest straw. So I decide what means we use to decide who's going to do… the thing. Rank doesn't enter into this, but if I get through the lines, I can recommend anyone for a posthumous VC... No? Fine. Dip, dip, dip… (muddles counting). + +00:01:10.000 --> 00:01:14.000 + +How about one potato, two potato, sir? + +00:01:14.000 --> 00:01:21.000 + +Don't be childish, Jenkins. I think fisties would be best. Hands behind backs… one, two, three! [action] All show fists except the armless padre. Now what's this… stone, stone, stone, and scissors. Scissors cut everything, don't they? + +00:01:21.000 --> 00:01:22.500 + +Not stone, sir. + +00:01:22.500 --> 00:01:27.000 + +They're very good scissors… Padre hasn't been! + +00:01:27.000 --> 00:01:28.500 + +No arms, sir. + +00:01:28.500 --> 00:01:31.000 + +Terribly sorry… Tell you what. All those people who don't want to stay here and shoot themselves raise their arms. + +00:01:31.000 --> 00:01:33.500 + +Stop it! Stop it! Stop this… this hideous façade. + +00:01:33.500 --> 00:01:35.000 + +Easy, padre! + +00:01:35.000 --> 00:01:52.000 + +[music] 'There'll Always Be An England' under. [monologue] When I came to this war, I had two arms... I gave it gladly... with every drop of rain that falls, a flower grows... that small fragile, delicate flower... + +00:01:52.000 --> 00:01:58.000 +[action] Two modern ambulance attendants wheel padre on trolley; fast motion to present-day hospital; sign: 'Royal Hospital for Over-acting'. Padre (V.O.) continues: '...freedom from fear and oppression... our children's children…' + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_25_-_Episode_Twenty-five/8_Hospital_for_over-actors.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_25_-_Episode_Twenty-five/8_Hospital_for_over-actors.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..d02229cf --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_25_-_Episode_Twenty-five/8_Hospital_for_over-actors.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,36 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE A tour through wards treating extreme theatrical over-acting + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:03.000 +[action] Interior hospital corridor; specialist walks and narrates. + +00:00:03.000 --> 00:00:12.000 + +All our patients here are suffering from severe over-acting. [action] Nurse leads a Long John Silver past, going 'Aha! Jim Lad'. When they're brought in they're all really over the top. [action] Passes a group of Long John Silvers. And it's our job to try and treat the condition… [indicates worst King Rat] rather serious. This is the Richard III Ward. + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:14.000 +[action] Reveal a crowd of Richard IIIs. + +00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:16.000 + +A horse. A horse. My kingdom for a horse. + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:22.000 + +Most of these cases are pretty unpleasant. Nurse… [action] Nurse sedates Richard III. But the treatment does work with some people. This chap came to us straight from the Chichester Festival; we operated just in time, and now he's almost normal. + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:24.500 + +A horse, a horse, my kingdom for a horse. + +00:00:24.500 --> 00:00:27.000 +[action] Specialist shakes head and leaves to next ward. + +00:00:27.000 --> 00:00:29.000 + +But in here we have some very nasty cases indeed. + +00:00:29.000 --> 00:00:34.000 +[animation] Grotesque Hamlets: 'To be or not to be. That is the question. To be…' + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_25_-_Episode_Twenty-five/9_Gumby_flower_arranging.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_25_-_Episode_Twenty-five/9_Gumby_flower_arranging.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..5f8d7945 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_25_-_Episode_Twenty-five/9_Gumby_flower_arranging.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,17 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE D. P. Gumby demonstrates flower arranging, badly + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:02.000 +[caption] FLOWER ARRANGEMENT + +00:00:02.000 --> 00:00:04.000 +[action] Pull back to studio: piles of flowers on a table. + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:05.500 +[caption] INTRODUCED BY D. P. GUMBY + +00:00:05.500 --> 00:00:14.000 + +Good evening. First take a bunch of flowers. [action] Grabs flowers. Pretty begonias, irises, freesias and cry-manthesums… then arrange them nicely in a vase. [action] He jams flowers head-down into vase, stuffing wildly; bangs with a mallet. Get in! Get in! Get in! + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_26/0_Episode26_head_tail.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_26/0_Episode26_head_tail.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..ee9911be --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_26/0_Episode26_head_tail.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,39 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Intro, opening titles, royal captions, interstitial credits and anthem moments aggregated into a single head/tail file. Timings are placeholders. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:08.000 +[action] Announcer stands in front of his desk. + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:01:10.000 + +Ladies and gentlemen, I am not simply going to say 'and now for something completely different' this week, as I do not think it fit. This is a particularly auspicious occasion for us this evening, as we have been told that Her Majesty the Queen will be watching part of the show tonight. We don't know exactly when Her Majesty will be tuning in. We understand that at the moment she is watching 'The Virginian', but we have been promised that we will be informed the moment that she changes channel. Her majesty would like everyone to behave quite normally but her equerry has asked me to request all of you at home to stand when the great moment arrives, although we here in the studio will be carrying on with our humorous vignettes and spoofs in the ordinary way. Thank you. And now without any more ado and completely as normal, here are the opening titles. [action] (bows) + +00:01:10.000 --> 00:01:16.000 +[action] Very regal animated opening titles. + +00:01:16.000 --> 00:01:20.000 +[caption] ROYAL EPISODE THIRTEEN + +00:01:20.000 --> 00:01:24.000 +[caption] FIRST SPOOF + +00:01:24.000 --> 00:01:30.000 +[caption] A COAL MINE IN LLANDDAROG CARMARTHEN + +00:10:15.000 --> 00:10:45.000 +[caption] THE TOAD ELEVATING MOMENT + +00:24:20.000 --> 00:25:05.000 +[action] The National Anthem plays; studio and audience stand to attention as a royal announcement is made. Camera reveals crew and audience standing. + +00:25:05.000 --> 00:25:40.000 + +And we've just heard that Her Majesty the Queen has just tuned into this programme and so she is now watching this royal sketch here in this royal set. The actor on the left is wearing the great grey suit of the BBC wardrobe department and the other actor is … about to deliver the first great royal joke here this royal evening. [action] (camera pans to show camera crew and audience at attention) Over to the right you can see the royal cameraman, and behind… Oh, we've just heard she's switched over. She's watching the 'News at Ten'. + +00:25:40.000 --> 00:26:15.000 +[action] Cut to 'News at Ten' set. National Anthem plays under; newsreader stands while continuing to read headlines. + +00:44:20.000 --> 00:45:00.000 +[action] Audience revolts and invades the set, remonstrating with performers, breaking up the sketch. The National Anthem starts. Everyone comes to attention. Credits roll. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_26/10_Insurance_sketch.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_26/10_Insurance_sketch.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..22555d33 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_26/10_Insurance_sketch.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,69 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Anchor #10. Life Insurance Ltd scene through royal interruption and News at Ten cut. Timings are placeholders. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[caption] MONTY PYTHON PROUDLY PRESENTS THE INSURANCE SKETCH + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:12.000 +[action] Smooth office: sign 'Life Insurance Ltd'. Mr Feldman behind desk; Mr Martin seated. + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:20.000 + +Good morning. I've been in touch with you about the, er, life insurance… + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:30.000 + +Ah yes, did you bring the um … the specimen of your um … and so on, and so on? + +00:00:30.000 --> 00:00:36.000 + +Yes I did. It's in the car. There's rather a lot. + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:38.000 + +Good, good. + +00:00:38.000 --> 00:00:44.000 + +Do you really need twelve gallons? + +00:00:44.000 --> 00:00:48.000 + +No, no, not really. + +00:00:48.000 --> 00:00:51.000 + +Do you test it? + +00:00:51.000 --> 00:00:53.000 + +No. + +00:00:53.000 --> 00:01:04.000 + +Well, why do you want it? + +00:01:04.000 --> 00:01:20.000 + +Well, we do it to make sure that you're serious about wanting insurance, I mean, if you're not, you won't spend a couple of months filling up that enormous churn with mmm, so on and so on… + +00:01:20.000 --> 00:01:24.000 + +Shall I bring it in? + +00:01:24.000 --> 00:01:28.000 + +Good Lord no. Throw it away. + +00:01:28.000 --> 00:01:36.000 + +Throw it away? I was months filling that thing up. + +00:01:36.000 --> 00:01:46.000 +[action] The National Anthem starts. Both stand to attention. Reverential voiceover identifies royal viewing; camera reveals crew and audience standing. Then: Her Majesty switches to News at Ten. + +00:01:46.000 --> 00:01:58.000 + +… despite the union's recommendation that the strikers should accept the second and third clauses of the agreement arrived at last Thursday. [action] (Anthem plays; Reggie stands, continues reading) Today saw the publication of the McGuffie Commission's controversial report on treatment of in-patients in north London hospitals. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_26/11_Hospital_run_by_RSM.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_26/11_Hospital_run_by_RSM.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..91d22907 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_26/11_Hospital_run_by_RSM.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,99 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Anchor #11. Military-style hospital and doctor vignettes to linkman hospital segue to mountaineer link. Timings are placeholders. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Sign: Intensive Care Unit. Heavily bandaged patients struggle onto courtyard and form up. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:38.000 + +Get on parade! Come on! We haven't got all day, have we? Come on, come on, come on. [action] (patients painfully line up) Hurry up … right! Now, I know some hospitals where you get the patients lying around in bed. Sleeping, resting, recuperating, convalescing. Well, that's not the way we do things here, right! No, you won't be loafing about in bed wasting the doctors' time. You - you horrible little cripple. What's the matter with you? + +00:00:38.000 --> 00:00:42.000 + +Fractured tibia, sergeant. + +00:00:42.000 --> 00:01:12.000 + +'Fractured tibia, sergeant'? 'Fractured tibia, sergeant'? Ooh. Proper little mummy's boy, aren't we? Well, I'll tell you something, my fine friend, if you fracture a tibia here you keep quiet about it! Look at him! [action] (inspects another) He's broken both his arms and he don't go shouting about it, do he? No! 'Cos he's a man - he's a woman, you see, so don't come that broken tibia talk with me. Get on at the double. One, two, three, pick that crutch up, pick that crutch right up. + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:18.000 +[action] Patient hobbles off at the double and falls over. + +00:01:18.000 --> 00:01:20.000 + +Aaargh! + +00:01:20.000 --> 00:01:30.000 + +Right, squad, 'shun! Squad, right turn. Squad, by the left, quick limp! Come on, pick 'em up. Get some air in those wounds. + +00:01:30.000 --> 00:01:36.000 +[action] Cut to second doctor smoking a cigar. + +00:01:36.000 --> 00:01:56.000 + +[to camera] Here at St Pooves, we believe in ART - Active Recuperation Techniques. We try to help the patient understand that however ill he may be, he can still fulfill a useful role in society. Sun lounge please, Mr Griffiths. + +00:01:56.000 --> 00:02:06.000 +[action] Pull back: doctor is in wheelchair; a bandaged patient wheels him off. + +00:02:06.000 --> 00:02:16.000 + +I've got a triple fracture of the right leg, dislocated collar bone and multiple head injuries, so I do most of the heavy work, like helping the surgeon. + +00:02:16.000 --> 00:02:22.000 + +What does that involve? + +00:02:22.000 --> 00:02:28.000 + +Well, at the moment we're building him a holiday home. + +00:02:28.000 --> 00:02:32.000 + +What about the nurses? + +00:02:32.000 --> 00:02:38.000 + +Well, I don't know about them. They're not allowed to mix with the patients. + +00:02:38.000 --> 00:02:42.000 + +Do all the patients work? + +00:02:42.000 --> 00:02:50.000 + +No, no, the ones that are really ill do sport. + +00:02:50.000 --> 00:03:04.000 +[action] Bandaged patients on a cross-country run; one falls; montage of sporting activities. + +00:03:04.000 --> 00:03:10.000 + +Yes, one thing patients here dread are the runs. + +00:03:10.000 --> 00:03:34.000 +[action] Visiting at an iron foundry; 'Dr Kildare' theme. Doctors being manicured and shoes cleaned by patients. + +00:03:34.000 --> 00:03:48.000 +[action] Sign: St Nathan's Hospital For Young, Attractive Girls Who Aren't Particularly Ill. + +00:03:48.000 --> 00:04:02.000 + +Er, very little shortage of doctors here. We have over forty doctors per bed - er, patient. Oh, be honest. Bed. + +00:04:02.000 --> 00:04:16.000 +[action] Sign: St Gandalf's Hospital For Very Rich People Who Like Giving Doctors Lots Of Money. + +00:04:16.000 --> 00:04:34.000 + +We've every facility here for dealing with people who are rich. We can deal with a blocked purse, we can drain private accounts and in the worst cases we can perform a total cashectomy, which is total removal of all moneys from the patient. + +00:04:34.000 --> 00:04:48.000 +[action] Sign: St Michael's Hospital For Linkmen. + +00:04:48.000 --> 00:05:06.000 + +Well, here we try to help people who have to link sketches together. We try to stop them saying 'Have you ever wondered what it would be like if' and instead say something like um… er… 'And now the mountaineering sketch'. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_26/12_Mountaineer.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_26/12_Mountaineer.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..e3873844 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_26/12_Mountaineer.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,18 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Anchor #12. Short mountaineer non-sketch and link to Blue Danube. Timings are placeholders. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Mountaineer hanging on ropes on a steep mountain face. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:12.000 + +I haven't written a mountaineering sketch. + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:16.000 +[caption] LINK + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:22.000 + +But now over to the exploding version of the 'Blue Danube'. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_26/13_Exploding_version_of_'The_Blue_Danube'.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_26/13_Exploding_version_of_'The_Blue_Danube'.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..24e870d4 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_26/13_Exploding_version_of_'The_Blue_Danube'.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,13 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Anchor #13. Orchestra explodes sequence. Timings are placeholders. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 +[action] Orchestra in a field plays 'The Blue Danube'. + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:34.000 +[action] On each musical phrase, a member of the orchestra explodes. + +00:00:34.000 --> 00:00:38.000 +[action] Fade to pitch darkness. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_26/14_Girls'_boarding_school.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_26/14_Girls'_boarding_school.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..1dc2e096 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_26/14_Girls'_boarding_school.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,83 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Anchor #14. Dorm raid and Miss Rodgers, naughtiest girl promo, wartime doc link. Timings are placeholders. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 + +And now a dormitory in a girls' public school. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:16.000 +[action] Female snores. Window sash lifts; scrabbling and padding feet across dorm. + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:24.000 + +Hello, Agnes… Agnes are you awake? Agnes…. + +00:00:24.000 --> 00:00:28.000 +[action] Sounds of waking and more padding feet. + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:32.000 + +Agnes… + +00:00:32.000 --> 00:00:38.000 + +Who is it … is that you, Charlie? + +00:00:38.000 --> 00:00:44.000 + +Yeah… Agnes, where's Jane? + +00:00:44.000 --> 00:00:48.000 + +I'm over here, Charlie. + +00:00:48.000 --> 00:00:54.000 + +Jane, we're going down to raid the tuck shop. + +00:00:54.000 --> 00:01:00.000 + +Oh good oh … count me in, girls. + +00:01:00.000 --> 00:01:06.000 + +Can I come, too, Agnes? + +00:01:06.000 --> 00:01:10.000 + +Yeah, Joyce. + +00:01:10.000 --> 00:01:14.000 + +And me and Avril… + +00:01:14.000 --> 00:01:18.000 + +Yeah, rather… and Suki. + +00:01:18.000 --> 00:01:22.000 + +Oh, whacko the diddle-oh. + +00:01:22.000 --> 00:01:28.000 + +Cave girls… Here comes Miss Rodgers… + +00:01:28.000 --> 00:01:46.000 +[action] Light on reveals 'girls' dorm': panto geese run off; men in string vests as schoolgirls; a goat hangs from ceiling with light bulbs on hooves. Commanding Miss Rodgers at the door. + +00:01:46.000 --> 00:01:56.000 + +All right girls, now stop this tomfoolery and get back to bed, remember it's the big match at St Bridget's tomorrow. + +00:01:56.000 --> 00:02:02.000 +[action] Still of one 'girl' in described uniform. + +00:02:02.000 --> 00:02:06.000 +[caption] THE NAUGHTIEST GIRL IN THE SCHOOL + +00:02:06.000 --> 00:02:34.000 + +Yes, on your screen tomorrow: 'The Naughtiest Girl in the School' starring the men of the 14th Marine Commandos. [action] (mosaic of topical photos) And now it's documentary time, when we look at the momentous last years of the Second World War, and tonight the invasion of Normandy performed by the girls of Oakdene High School, Upper Fifth Science. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_26/15_Submarine.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_26/15_Submarine.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..08e9bfdd --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_26/15_Submarine.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,98 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Anchor #15. Pepperpot submarine sequence and complaint letter and man with stoat. Timings are placeholders. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:14.000 +[action] Stock film: landing craft; then periscope view scanning ocean; interior of submarine with pepperpots knitting. + +00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:18.000 + +Oh, it's still raining. + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:22.000 + +I'm going down the shops. + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:32.000 + +Oh, be a dear and get me some rats' bane for the budgie's boil. Otherwise I'll put your eyes out. + +00:00:32.000 --> 00:00:36.000 + +Aye, aye, captain. [action] (goes out) + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:44.000 +[action] Attention noise at communication tube; red light flashes. + +00:00:44.000 --> 00:00:48.000 + +Coo-ee. Torpedo bay. + +00:00:48.000 --> 00:00:52.000 + +Yoo-hoo. Torpedo bay. + +00:00:52.000 --> 00:00:56.000 + +She said torpedo bay. + +00:00:56.000 --> 00:01:00.000 + +Yes, she did, she did. + +00:01:00.000 --> 00:01:04.000 + +Yes, she said torpedo bay. She did, she did. + +00:01:04.000 --> 00:01:12.000 + +Mrs Lieutenant Edale here. Mrs Midshipman Nesbitt's got one of her headaches again, so I put her in the torpedo tube. + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:18.000 + +Roger, Mrs Edale. Stand by to fire Mrs Nesbitt. + +00:01:18.000 --> 00:01:22.000 + +Stand by to fire Mrs Nesbitt. + +00:01:22.000 --> 00:01:26.000 + +Red alert, put the kettle on. + +00:01:26.000 --> 00:01:28.000 + +Kettle on. + +00:01:28.000 --> 00:01:32.000 + +Engine room, stand by to feed the cat. + +00:01:32.000 --> 00:01:36.000 + +Standing by to feed the cat. + +00:01:36.000 --> 00:01:40.000 + +Fire Mrs Nesbitt. + +00:01:40.000 --> 00:01:48.000 +[action] ANIMATION: a pepperpot fired from torpedo tube travels through water and clangs into a battleship. + +00:01:48.000 --> 00:01:52.000 + +Oh, that's much better. + +00:01:52.000 --> 00:02:16.000 +[caption] As an admiral who came up through the ranks more times than you've had hot dinners, I wish to join my husband Admiral O.W.A Giveaway in condemning this shoddy misrepresentation of our modern navy. The British Navy is one of the finest and most attractive and butchest fighting forces in the world. I love those white flared trousers and the feel of rough blue serge on those pert little buttocks! + +00:02:16.000 --> 00:02:24.000 +[action] Cut to a presenter at a desk. + +00:02:24.000 --> 00:02:36.000 + +I'm afraid we are unable to show you any more of that letter. We continue with a man with a stoat through his head. + +00:02:36.000 --> 00:02:44.000 +[action] Cut to man with a stoat through his head. He bows. Cut to film of Women's Institute applauding. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_26/16_Lifeboat_(cannibalism).vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_26/16_Lifeboat_(cannibalism).vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..96f8a178 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_26/16_Lifeboat_(cannibalism).vtt @@ -0,0 +1,199 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Anchor #16. Lifeboat at sea with five sailors; decision about who to eat; audience boos; letter about cannibalism; Gilliam cannibal animation; call for clean sketch. Timings are placeholders. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:08.000 +[action] Lifeboat at sea, miles from land. Five bedraggled sailors. + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:14.000 + +Still no sign of land … How long is it? + +00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:18.000 + +That's a rather personal question, sir. + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:28.000 + +You stupid git. I meant how long we've been in the lifeboat. You've spoilt the atmosphere now. + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:32.000 + +I'm sorry. + +00:00:32.000 --> 00:00:40.000 + +Shut up! We'll have to start again … Still no sign of land … how long is it? + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:44.000 + +Thirty-three days, sir. + +00:00:44.000 --> 00:00:48.000 + +Thirty-three days? + +00:00:48.000 --> 00:00:56.000 + +I don't think we can hold out much longer. I don't think I did spoil the atmosphere. + +00:00:56.000 --> 00:00:58.000 + +Shut up! + +00:00:58.000 --> 00:01:06.000 +[action] Restart attempts are repeatedly interrupted; fourth sailor asks if they've started again; he is kicked. + +00:01:06.000 --> 00:01:12.000 + +We can't go hold out much longer, sir. We haven't had any food since the fifth day. + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:16.000 + +We're done for, we're done for! + +00:01:16.000 --> 00:01:20.000 + +Shut up, Maudling. We've just got to keep hoping someone will find us. + +00:01:20.000 --> 00:01:26.000 + +How are you feeling, captain? + +00:01:26.000 --> 00:01:32.000 + +Not too good … I … feel … so weak. + +00:01:32.000 --> 00:01:44.000 + +Listen … chaps … there's one last chance. I'm done for, I've got a gammy leg, I'm going fast, I'll never get through … but … some of you might … so you'd better eat me. + +00:01:44.000 --> 00:01:48.000 + +Eat you, sir? + +00:01:48.000 --> 00:01:52.000 + +Yes. Eat me. + +00:01:52.000 --> 00:01:58.000 + +Uuuuggghhh! With a gammy leg? + +00:01:58.000 --> 00:02:08.000 + +You don't have to eat the leg, Thompson, there's still plenty of good meat … look at that arm. + +00:02:08.000 --> 00:02:12.000 + +It's not just the leg, sir. + +00:02:12.000 --> 00:02:18.000 + +What do you mean? + +00:02:18.000 --> 00:02:22.000 + +Well, sir … it's just that … + +00:02:22.000 --> 00:02:28.000 + +Why don't you want to eat me? + +00:02:28.000 --> 00:02:34.000 + +I'd rather eat Johnson, sir. [action] (points at fourth sailor) + +00:02:34.000 --> 00:02:38.000 + +Oh, so would I, sir. + +00:02:38.000 --> 00:02:40.000 + +I see. + +00:02:40.000 --> 00:02:46.000 + +Well, that's settled then. Everyone eats me. + +00:02:46.000 --> 00:02:54.000 + +Well … I … er … + +00:02:54.000 --> 00:02:58.000 + +What, sir? + +00:02:58.000 --> 00:03:04.000 + +No, no, you go ahead, I won't … + +00:03:04.000 --> 00:03:10.000 + +Nonsense, nonsense, sir, you're starving. Tuck in! + +00:03:10.000 --> 00:03:16.000 + +No, no, it's not just that … + +00:03:16.000 --> 00:03:22.000 + +What's the matter with Johnson, sir? + +00:03:22.000 --> 00:03:28.000 + +Well, he's not kosher. + +00:03:28.000 --> 00:03:34.000 + +That depends how we kill him, sir. + +00:03:34.000 --> 00:03:42.000 + +Yes, yes, I see that … well to be quite frank, I like my meat a little more lean. I'd rather eat Hodges. + +00:03:42.000 --> 00:03:46.000 + +Oh well … all right. + +00:03:46.000 --> 00:03:50.000 + +No, I'd still prefer Johnson. + +00:03:50.000 --> 00:03:56.000 + +I wish you'd all stop bickering and eat me. + +00:03:56.000 --> 00:04:10.000 + +Look! I'll tell you what. Why don't those of us who want to, eat Johnson, then you, sir, can eat my leg and then we'll make a stock of the Captain and then after that we can eat the rest of Johnson cold for supper. + +00:04:10.000 --> 00:04:14.000 + +Good thinking, Hodges. + +00:04:14.000 --> 00:04:20.000 + +And we'll finish off with the peaches. [action] (picks up a tin of peaches) + +00:04:20.000 --> 00:04:26.000 + +And we can start off with the avocados. [action] (picks up two avocados) + +00:04:26.000 --> 00:04:36.000 + +Waitress! [action] (a waitress walks in) We've decided now, we're going to have leg of Hodges … + +00:04:36.000 --> 00:04:42.000 +[caption] Boos off-screen. + +00:04:42.000 --> 00:05:10.000 +[caption] Dear Sir, I am glad to hear that your studio audience disapproves of the last skit as strongly as I. As a naval officer I abhor the implication that the Royal Navy is a haven for cannibalism. It is well known that we have the problem relatively under control, and that it is the RAF who now suffer the largest casualties in this area. And what do you think the Argylls ate in Aden. Arabs? Yours etc. Captain B.J. Smethwick in a white wine sauce with shallots, mushrooms and garlic. + +00:05:10.000 --> 00:05:26.000 +[action] ANIMATION: various nasty cannibalistic scenes. + +00:05:26.000 --> 00:05:34.000 + +Stop it, stop it. Stop this cannibalism. Let's have a sketch about clean, decent human beings. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_26/17_Undertaker's_sketch.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_26/17_Undertaker's_sketch.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..bcd31d24 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_26/17_Undertaker's_sketch.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,168 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Anchor #17. Undertaker offers burial, burning, dumping, and eating; audience invades; anthem and credits. Timings are placeholders. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 +[action] Undertaker's shop. + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:08.000 + +Morning. + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:10.000 + +Good Morning. + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:16.000 + +What can I do for you, squire? + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:26.000 + +Um, well, I wonder if you can help me. You see, my mother has just died. + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:34.000 + +Ah well, we can help you. We deal with stiffs. + +00:00:34.000 --> 00:00:36.000 + +What? + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:48.000 + +Well, there's three things we can do with your mum. We can bury her, burn her, or dump her. + +00:00:48.000 --> 00:00:52.000 + +Dump her? + +00:00:52.000 --> 00:00:56.000 + +Dump her in the Thames. + +00:00:56.000 --> 00:00:58.000 + +What? + +00:00:58.000 --> 00:01:02.000 + +Oh, did you like her? + +00:01:02.000 --> 00:01:06.000 + +Yes! + +00:01:06.000 --> 00:01:14.000 + +Oh well, we won't dump her, then. Well, what do you think? We can bury her or burn her. + +00:01:14.000 --> 00:01:20.000 + +Well, which do you recommend? + +00:01:20.000 --> 00:01:40.000 + +Well, they're both nasty. If we burn her, she gets stuffed in the flames, crackle, crackle, crackle, which is a bit of a shock if she's not quite dead, but quick. [caption] (audience starts booing) and then we give you handful of ashes, which you can pretend are hers. + +00:01:40.000 --> 00:01:44.000 + +Oh. + +00:01:44.000 --> 00:02:02.000 + +Or, if we bury her she gets eaten up lots of weevils, and nasty maggots, [caption] (booing increases) which as I said before is a bit of a shock if she's not quite dead. + +00:02:02.000 --> 00:02:08.000 + +I see. Well, she's definitely dead. + +00:02:08.000 --> 00:02:12.000 + +Where is she? + +00:02:12.000 --> 00:02:16.000 + +She's in this sack. + +00:02:16.000 --> 00:02:24.000 + +Can I have a look? She looks quite young. + +00:02:24.000 --> 00:02:28.000 + +Yes, yes, she was. + +00:02:28.000 --> 00:02:32.000 +[caption] Increasing protests from audience. + +00:02:32.000 --> 00:02:36.000 + +Fred! + +00:02:36.000 --> 00:02:40.000 + +Yeah? + +00:02:40.000 --> 00:02:44.000 + +I think we've got an eater. + +00:02:44.000 --> 00:02:48.000 + +What? + +00:02:48.000 --> 00:02:54.000 +[action] Another undertaker pokes head round the door. + +00:02:54.000 --> 00:02:58.000 + +Right, I'll get the oven on. [action] (goes off) + +00:02:58.000 --> 00:03:06.000 + +Er, excuse me, um, are you suggesting eating my mother? + +00:03:06.000 --> 00:03:12.000 + +Er … Yeah. Not raw. Cooked. + +00:03:12.000 --> 00:03:16.000 + +What? + +00:03:16.000 --> 00:03:26.000 + +Yes, roasted with a few french fries, broccoli, horseradish sauce … + +00:03:26.000 --> 00:03:30.000 + +Well, I do feel a bit peckish. + +00:03:30.000 --> 00:03:36.000 + +Disgraceful! Boo! (etc.) + +00:03:36.000 --> 00:03:40.000 + +Great! + +00:03:40.000 --> 00:03:44.000 + +Can we have some parsnips? + +00:03:44.000 --> 00:03:50.000 + +Fred - get some parsnips. + +00:03:50.000 --> 00:03:56.000 + +I really don't think I should. + +00:03:56.000 --> 00:04:10.000 + +Look, tell you what, we'll eat her, if you feel a bit guilty about it after, we can dig a grave and you can throw up in it. + +00:04:10.000 --> 00:04:30.000 +[action] Section of the audience revolts and invades the set, remonstrating and banging the counter, breaking up the sketch. Zoom to caption machine; roll credits. The National Anthem starts; shouting stops; audience and set stand to attention as credits end. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_26/1_The_Queen_will_be_watching.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_26/1_The_Queen_will_be_watching.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..3f08ce6a --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_26/1_The_Queen_will_be_watching.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,20 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Anchor #1. Includes intro announcement and regal titles lead-in until coal mine caption. Timings are placeholders. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 +[action] Announcer stands in front of his desk. + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:01:05.000 + +Ladies and gentlemen, I am not simply going to say 'and now for something completely different' this week, as I do not think it fit. This is a particularly auspicious occasion for us this evening, as we have been told that Her Majesty the Queen will be watching part of the show tonight. We don't know exactly when Her Majesty will be tuning in. We understand that at the moment she is watching 'The Virginian', but we have been promised that we will be informed the moment that she changes channel. Her majesty would like everyone to behave quite normally but her equerry has asked me to request all of you at home to stand when the great moment arrives, although we here in the studio will be carrying on with our humorous vignettes and spoofs in the ordinary way. Thank you. And now without any more ado and completely as normal, here are the opening titles. [action] (bows) + +00:01:05.000 --> 00:01:12.000 +[action] Very regal animated opening titles. + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:16.000 +[caption] ROYAL EPISODE THIRTEEN + +00:01:16.000 --> 00:01:20.000 +[caption] FIRST SPOOF + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_26/2_Coal_mine_(historical_argument).vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_26/2_Coal_mine_(historical_argument).vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..99881d02 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_26/2_Coal_mine_(historical_argument).vtt @@ -0,0 +1,130 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Anchor #2. From coal mine caption through newsreader and Toad Elevating Moment caption. Timings are placeholders. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:05.000 +[caption] A COAL MINE IN LLANDDAROG CARMARTHEN + +00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:15.000 +[action] A nice photograph of a typical pit head. 'All Through the Night' sung in Welsh plays over. + +00:00:15.000 --> 00:00:55.000 + +The coal miners of Wales have long been famed for their tough rugged life hewing the black gold from the uncompromising hell of one mile under. This is [caption] (HM THE QUEEN STILL WATCHING 'THE VIRGINIAN') the story of such men, battling gallantly against floods, roof falls, the English criminal law, the hidden killer carbon monoxide and the ever-present threat of pneumoconiosis which is… a disease miners get. + +00:00:55.000 --> 00:01:05.000 +[action] Cut to coal face below ground; miners hew, grunt, chat. Two square up to fight. + +00:01:05.000 --> 00:01:10.000 + +Don't you talk to me like that, you lying bastard. + +00:01:10.000 --> 00:01:13.000 +[action] He hits the second miner. A fight starts. + +00:01:13.000 --> 00:01:18.000 + +You bleeding pig. You're not fit to be down a mine. + +00:01:18.000 --> 00:01:24.000 + +Typical bleeding Rhondda, isn't it. You think you're so bloody clever. + +00:01:24.000 --> 00:01:30.000 +[action] They writhe and pummel. The foreman enters. + +00:01:30.000 --> 00:01:39.000 + +You bloody fighting again. Break it up or I'll put this pick through your head. Now what's it all about? + +00:01:39.000 --> 00:01:42.000 + +He started it. + +00:01:42.000 --> 00:01:46.000 + +Oh, you bleeding pig, you started it. + +00:01:46.000 --> 00:01:51.000 + +I don't care who bloody started it. What's it about? + +00:01:51.000 --> 00:01:58.000 + +Well … he said the bloody Treaty of Utrecht was 1713. + +00:01:58.000 --> 00:02:02.000 + +So it bloody is. + +00:02:02.000 --> 00:02:10.000 + +No it bloody isn't. It wasn't ratified 'til February 1714. + +00:02:10.000 --> 00:02:16.000 + +He's bluffing. You're mind's gone, Jenkins. You're rubbish. + +00:02:16.000 --> 00:02:26.000 + +He's right, Jenkins. It was ratified September 1713. The whole bloody pit knows that. Look in Trevelyan, page 468. + +00:02:26.000 --> 00:02:31.000 + +He's thinking of the Treaty of bloody Westphalia. + +00:02:31.000 --> 00:02:40.000 + +Are you saying I don't know the difference between the War of the bloody Spanish Succession and the Thirty bloody Years War? + +00:02:40.000 --> 00:02:47.000 + +You don't know the difference between the Battle of Borodino and a tiger's bum. + +00:02:47.000 --> 00:02:52.000 +[action] They start to fight. + +00:02:52.000 --> 00:03:08.000 + +Break it up, break it up. [action] (he hits them with his pickaxe) I'm sick of all this bloody fighting. If it's not the bloody Treaty of Utrecht it's the bloody binomial theorem. This isn't the senior common room at All Souls, it's the bloody coal face. + +00:03:08.000 --> 00:03:12.000 +[action] A fourth miner runs up. + +00:03:12.000 --> 00:03:28.000 + +Hey, gaffer, can you settle something? Morgan here says you find the abacus between the triglyphs in the frieze section of the entablature of classical Greek Doric temples. + +00:03:28.000 --> 00:03:38.000 + +You bloody fool, Morgan, that's the metope. The abacus is between the architrave and the aechinus in the capital. + +00:03:38.000 --> 00:03:42.000 + +You stinking liar. + +00:03:42.000 --> 00:03:54.000 +[action] Another fight breaks out. A management man arrives on a sedan chair, sign reading 'frightfully important'. Miners prostrate themselves. + +00:03:54.000 --> 00:04:23.000 + +Oh, most magnificent and merciful majesty, master of the universe, protector of the meek, whose nose we are not worthy to pick and whose very feces are an untrammelled delight, and whose peacocks keep us awake all hours of the night with their noisy lovemaking, we beseech thee, tell thy humble servants the name of the section between the triglyphs in the frieze section of a classical Doric entablature. + +00:04:23.000 --> 00:04:27.000 + +No idea. Sorry. + +00:04:27.000 --> 00:04:31.000 + +Right. Everybody out. + +00:04:31.000 --> 00:04:39.000 +[action] They walk off, throwing down tools. Cut to newsreader's desk. + +00:04:39.000 --> 00:05:15.000 + +Still no settlement in the coal mine dispute at Llanddarog. Miners refused to return to work until the management define a metope. Meanwhile, at Dagenham the unofficial strike committee at Fords have increased their demands to thirteen reasons why Henry III was a bad king. And finally, in the disgusting objects international at Wembley tonight, England beat Spain by a plate of braised pus to a putrid heron. And now, the Toad Elevating Moment. + +00:05:15.000 --> 00:05:20.000 +[caption] THE TOAD ELEVATING MOMENT + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_26/3_The_man_who_says_things_in_a_very_roundabout_way.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_26/3_The_man_who_says_things_in_a_very_roundabout_way.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..f349dd48 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_26/3_The_man_who_says_things_in_a_very_roundabout_way.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,47 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Anchor #3. Interview with Mr Pudifoot until he exits. Timings are placeholders. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 +[action] Pompous music. Spinning globe to studio with two men. + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:14.000 + +Good evening. Well, we have in the studio tonight a man who says things in a very roundabout way. Isn't that so, Mr Pudifoot. + +00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:16.000 + +Yes. + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:22.000 + +Have you always said things in a very roundabout way? + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:24.000 + +Yes. + +00:00:24.000 --> 00:00:40.000 + +Well, I can't help noticing that, for someone who claims to say things in a very roundabout way, your last two answers have very little of the discursive quality about them. + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:01:10.000 + +Oh, well, I'm not very talkative today. It's a form of defensive response to intensive interrogative stimuli. I used to get it badly when I was a boy … well, I say very badly, in fact, do you remember when there was that fashion for, you know, little poodles with small coats… + +00:01:10.000 --> 00:01:18.000 + +Ah, now you're beginning to talk in a roundabout way. + +00:01:18.000 --> 00:01:20.000 + +Oh, I'm sorry. + +00:01:20.000 --> 00:01:30.000 + +No, no, no, no. Please do carry on … because that is in fact why we wanted you on the show. + +00:01:30.000 --> 00:01:42.000 + +I thought it was because you were interested in me as a human being. [action] (gets up and leaves) + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_26/4_The_man_who_speaks_only_the_ends_of_words.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_26/4_The_man_who_speaks_only_the_ends_of_words.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..13c3518d --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_26/4_The_man_who_speaks_only_the_ends_of_words.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,47 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Anchor #4. Interview with Mr Ohn Ith (ends-of-words). Timings are placeholders. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:08.000 + +Well… lets move on to our guest who not only lives in Essex but also speaks only the ends of words. Mr Ohn Ith. Mr Ith, good evening. + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:12.000 +[action] Enter as per Eamonn Andrews show; Mr Ohn Ith sits. + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:16.000 + +… ood … ing. + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:22.000 + +Nice to have you on the show. + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:28.000 + +… ice … o … e … ere. + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:40.000 + +Mr Ith, don't you find it very difficult to make yourself understood? + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:48.000 + +Yes, it is extremely difficult. + +00:00:48.000 --> 00:00:54.000 + +Just a minute, you're a fraud + +00:00:54.000 --> 00:01:04.000 + +Oh no. I can speak the third and fourth sentences perfectly normally. + +00:01:04.000 --> 00:01:12.000 + +Oh I see. So your next sentence will be only the ends of words again? + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:16.000 + +T's… ight. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_26/5_The_man_who_speaks_only_the_beginnings_of_words.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_26/5_The_man_who_speaks_only_the_beginnings_of_words.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..a9153b33 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_26/5_The_man_who_speaks_only_the_beginnings_of_words.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,35 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Anchor #5. Interview with Mr Sm (beginnings-of-words) plus brief exchange with Mr Ith. Timings are placeholders. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:12.000 + +Well, let's move on to our next guest who speaks only the beginnings of words, Mr J … Sm… Mr Sm… good evening. + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:18.000 +[action] Enter Mr Sm. + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:22.000 + +G… e… + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:30.000 + +Well, have you two met before? + +00:00:30.000 --> 00:00:33.000 + +N… + +00:00:33.000 --> 00:00:36.000 + +… o + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:39.000 + +N… + +00:00:39.000 --> 00:00:42.000 + +… o + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_26/6_The_man_who_speaks_only_the_middles_of_words.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_26/6_The_man_who_speaks_only_the_middles_of_words.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..2934f741 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_26/6_The_man_who_speaks_only_the_middles_of_words.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,75 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Anchor #6. Scot joins; coordinated 'Good evening'. Timings are placeholders. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:12.000 + +Well, this is really a fascinating occasion because we have in the studio Mr … oh … I … who speaks only the middles of words. Good evening. + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:16.000 +[action] Enter Scot. + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:20.000 + +…. oo …… ni… + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:26.000 + +Um, where do you come from? + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:31.000 + +. .. u… i… a… + +00:00:31.000 --> 00:00:42.000 + +Dunfermline in Scotland. Well let me introduce you, Mr Ohn Ith… + +00:00:42.000 --> 00:00:46.000 + +… ood … ing. + +00:00:46.000 --> 00:00:50.000 + +… oo …… ni… + +00:00:50.000 --> 00:00:54.000 + +J… Sm… + +00:00:54.000 --> 00:00:58.000 + +… oo …… ni… + +00:00:58.000 --> 00:01:02.000 + +G… Eve… + +00:01:02.000 --> 00:01:12.000 + +Yes, well, ha, ha, just a moment. Perhaps you would all like to say good evening together. + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:14.000 + +G… + +00:01:14.000 --> 00:01:16.000 + +. .. oo… + +00:01:16.000 --> 00:01:18.000 + +… d + +00:01:18.000 --> 00:01:20.000 + +Eve… + +00:01:20.000 --> 00:01:22.000 + +… ni… + +00:01:22.000 --> 00:01:24.000 + +… ing. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_26/7_Commercials.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_26/7_Commercials.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..f565aeab --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_26/7_Commercials.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,18 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Anchor #7. Crelm Toothpaste gag to corset/truss ad lead-in to goldfish segment. Timings are placeholders. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] ANIMATION: Crelm Toothpaste parody transitions to live ad set. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:28.000 + +This table has been treated with ordinary soap powder, but these have been treated with new Fibro-Val. [action] (washing machine top shot spins) We put both of them through our washing machine, and just look at the difference. [action] (back to set; sheets obviously painted white; table smashed up) The table is broken and smashed, but the sheets, with Fibro-Val, are sparkling clean and white. + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:36.000 +[action] Traditional expanding square link. Animated countryside with flowers, butterflies and Babycham animal. A boy and a girl wander hand in hand. + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:01:06.000 + +I love the surgical garment. Enjoy the delights of the Victor Mature abdominal corset. Sail down the Nile on the Bleed-it Kosher Truss. [action] Adman steps in holding tailor's dummy pelvis with truss. And don't forget the Hercules Hold-'em-in, the all-purpose concrete truss for the man with the family hernia. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_26/8_How_to_feed_a_goldfish.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_26/8_How_to_feed_a_goldfish.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..5d2546af --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_26/8_How_to_feed_a_goldfish.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,29 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Anchor #8. Fish Club segment and RSPCA interruption. Timings are placeholders. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:05.000 +[action] Background changes to a fish tank close-up. Adman at a desk pulls a goldfish bowl over. + +00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:42.000 + +Well last week on Fish Club we learnt how to sex a pike … and this week we're going to learn how to feed a goldfish. Now contrary to what most people think the goldfish has a ravenous appetite. If it doesn't get enough protein it gets very thin and its bones begin to stick out and its fins start to fall off. So once a week give your goldfish a really good meal. Here's one specially recommended by the board of Irresponsible People. First, some cold consommé or a gazpacho [action] (pours it in), then some sausages with spring greens, sautéed potatoes and bread and gravy. + +00:00:42.000 --> 00:00:48.000 +[action] He tips the meal into the bowl. An RSPCA man rushes in, grabs him, and hauls him off. + +00:00:48.000 --> 00:00:54.000 + +All right, come on, that's enough, that's enough. + +00:00:54.000 --> 00:01:00.000 + +… treacle tart … chocolate cake and … + +00:01:00.000 --> 00:01:20.000 +[caption] THE RSPCA WISH IT TO BE KNOWN THAT THAT MAN WAS NOT A BONA FIDE ANIMAL LOVER, AND ALSO THAT GOLDFISH DO NOT EAT SAUSAGES. [action] (man still shouting) SHUT UP! … THEY ARE QUITE HAPPY WITH BREADCRUMBS, ANT'S EGGS AND THE OCCASIONAL PHEASANT … [action] The last four words are crossed out. + +00:01:20.000 --> 00:01:24.000 + +Who wrote that? + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_26/9_The_man_who_collects_birdwatcher's_eggs.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_26/9_The_man_who_collects_birdwatcher's_eggs.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..b5d90f14 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_26/9_The_man_who_collects_birdwatcher's_eggs.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,28 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Anchor #9. From pastoral open through Spiny Norman interlude. Timings are placeholders. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:18.000 +[action] Lyrical wild flowers; gentle pastoral music. Lovers' sounds heard. Camera reveals tape recorder; pans to couple reading; passes an Italian head waiter bowing. + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:22.000 + +I hope you're enjoying the show. + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:40.000 +[action] Camera finds a man in long mac crawling stealthily. He opens a birdwatcher's knapsack, removes a small pie, a tomato, and pockets two hard-boiled eggs. + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:50.000 + +Herbert Mental collects birdwatchers' eggs. At his home in Surrey he has a collection of over four hundred of them. + +00:00:50.000 --> 00:01:28.000 +[action] Study mantle lined with shelves of hard-boiled eggs with labels. Herbert selects one and explains his hobby, recounting appearances on 'Man Alive' and 'Nationwide', and shows pinned butterfly hunters and racing pigeon fanciers. + +00:01:28.000 --> 00:01:58.000 +[action] Field: attendant opens hamper; pigeon fanciers leap out and run in fast motion. Montage of baskets opening and fanciers wheeling like pigeons. Trafalgar Square: fanciers wheel. Gilliam art: chicken man flies past towing 'This Space Available, tel 498 5116'. A huge hedgehog head appears above St Martin's-in-the-Fields. + +00:01:58.000 --> 00:02:02.000 + +Dinsdale! Dinsdale! + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_27__Whicker's_World/0_Episode_Head_and_Tail.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_27__Whicker's_World/0_Episode_Head_and_Tail.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..b82bda7a --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_27__Whicker's_World/0_Episode_Head_and_Tail.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,35 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Includes intro montage, titles, and end credits. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:05.000 +[music] The camera pans across Glencoe as wind crescendos into a great chord. + +00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:08.000 +[caption] 'NJORL'S SAGA' / 'ICELAND 1126' + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:12.000 + +I Eric ... um + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:16.000 +[action] Cut to naked organist grinning and playing a few chords. + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:18.000 + +And now ... + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:19.500 + +It's ... + +00:00:19.500 --> 00:00:22.000 + +Monty Python's Flying Circus! + +00:28:00.000 --> 00:28:05.000 +[caption] THE END + +00:28:05.000 --> 00:29:30.000 +[credits] WHICKER'S WORLD credits roll with plane taking off. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_27__Whicker's_World/1_Court_scene_-_multiple_murderer.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_27__Whicker's_World/1_Court_scene_-_multiple_murderer.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..4ad789cc --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_27__Whicker's_World/1_Court_scene_-_multiple_murderer.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,205 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Skit starts at anchor #1. + +00:01:00.000 --> 00:01:05.000 +[action] Cut to a courtroom. Severe atmosphere. + +00:01:05.000 --> 00:01:28.000 + +Michael Norman Randall, you have been found guilty of the murder of Arthur Reginald Webster, Charles Patrick Trumpington, Marcel Agnes Bernstein, Lewis Anona Rudd, John Malcolm Kerr, Nigel Sinclair Robinson, Norman Arthur Potter, Felicity Jayne Stone, Jean-Paul Reynard, Rachel Shirley Donaldson, Stephen Jay Greenblatt, Karl-Heinz Mullet, Belinda Anne Ventham, Juan-Carlos Fernandez, Thor Olaf Stensgaard, Lord Kimberley of Pretoria, Lady Kimberley of Pretoria, The Right Honourable Nigel Warmsly Kimberley, Robert Henry Noonan and Felix James Bennett, on or about the morning of the 19th December 1972. Have you anything to say before I pass sentence? + +00:01:28.000 --> 00:01:31.000 + +Yes, sir. I'm very sorry. + +00:01:31.000 --> 00:01:32.500 + +Very sorry? + +00:01:32.500 --> 00:02:20.000 + +Yes, sir. It was a very very bad thing to have done and I'm really very ashamed of myself. I can only say it won't happen again. To have murdered so many people in such a short space of time is really awful, and I really am very, very, very sorry that I did it, and also that I've taken up so much of the court's valuable time listening to the sordid details of these senseless killings of mine. I would particularly like to say, a very personal and sincere 'sorry' to you, m'lud, for my appalling behaviour throughout this trial. I'd also like to say sorry to the police, for putting them to so much trouble + +00:02:20.000 --> 00:02:25.000 +[action] Shot of three heavily bandaged exhausted-looking policemen behind him. + +00:02:25.000 --> 00:02:28.000 + +No, no, we were only doing our job. + +00:02:28.000 --> 00:02:30.000 + +No, no, no, no. + +00:02:30.000 --> 00:02:33.000 + +It's very good of you to say that, but I know what you've been through. + +00:02:33.000 --> 00:02:35.500 + +No, no, we've had worse. + +00:02:35.500 --> 00:02:38.000 + +It was plain sailing apart from the arrest. + +00:02:38.000 --> 00:02:43.000 + +I'd like to apologize too to the prosecuting counsel for dragging him in here morning after morning in such lovely weather. + +00:02:43.000 --> 00:02:45.500 + +Well, I would have had to come in anyway. + +00:02:45.500 --> 00:02:47.500 + +Ah good, but what a presentation of a case! + +00:02:47.500 --> 00:02:48.800 + +Oh thank you. + +00:02:48.800 --> 00:02:51.800 + +No, no, it's a privilege to watch you in action. I never had a chance. + +00:02:51.800 --> 00:02:53.000 + +Oh yes you did. + +00:02:53.000 --> 00:02:55.000 + +Not after that summing up. Great. + +00:02:55.000 --> 00:02:57.000 + +Oh thank you. + +00:02:57.000 --> 00:03:04.000 + +And now I must come to the jury. What can I say. I've dragged you in here, day after day, keeping you away from your homes, your jobs, your loved ones, just to hear the private details of my petty atrocities. + +00:03:04.000 --> 00:03:06.500 + +No, no, it was very interesting. + +00:03:06.500 --> 00:03:08.500 + +But you could have had a much nicer case. + +00:03:08.500 --> 00:03:10.500 + +No, no, murder's much more fun. + +00:03:10.500 --> 00:03:12.500 + +Yes and so many of them. + +00:03:12.500 --> 00:03:13.800 + +Excellent. + +00:03:13.800 --> 00:03:17.500 + +We've had a terrific time. + +00:03:17.500 --> 00:03:19.500 +[applause] The jury applauds. + +00:03:19.500 --> 00:03:25.000 + +[sniffs] I'm sorry, I'm very moved. And so, m'lud, it only remains for you to pass the most savage sentence on me that the law can provide. + +00:03:25.000 --> 00:03:27.000 + +Well er... not necessarily. + +00:03:27.000 --> 00:03:31.000 + +No, m'lud, the full penalty of the law is hardly sufficient. I insist I must be made an example of. + +00:03:31.000 --> 00:03:34.000 + +Well yes and no. I mean society at large... + +00:03:34.000 --> 00:03:36.000 + +Oh no, m'lud. Not with mass murder. + +00:03:36.000 --> 00:03:39.000 + +But in this case, don't you think? + +00:03:39.000 --> 00:03:40.500 + +Yes, yes! + +00:03:40.500 --> 00:03:43.000 + +Oh, come on, m'lud, you've got to give me life. + +00:03:43.000 --> 00:03:44.500 + +No, no, no, no. + +00:03:44.500 --> 00:03:47.000 + +Well, ten years at least. + +00:03:47.000 --> 00:03:48.500 + +Ten years! + +00:03:48.500 --> 00:03:50.500 + +Shame. Shame! + +00:03:50.500 --> 00:03:53.000 + +Well five then. Be fair. + +00:03:53.000 --> 00:03:55.000 + +No, no. I'm giving you three months. + +00:03:55.000 --> 00:03:58.000 + +Oh no, that's so embarrassing. I won't hear of it. Give me six...please. + +00:03:58.000 --> 00:03:59.500 + +Well, all right. Six months. + +00:03:59.500 --> 00:04:01.000 + +Thank you, m'lud. + +00:04:01.000 --> 00:04:02.500 + +But suspended. + +00:04:02.500 --> 00:04:03.500 + +Oh no. + +00:04:03.500 --> 00:04:06.500 + +Hooray. + +00:04:06.500 --> 00:04:08.800 + +Three cheers for the defendant. Hip. Hip. + +00:04:08.800 --> 00:04:12.800 + +Hooray. ... Hip. Hip. ... Hooray. ... Hip. Hip. ... Hooray. + +00:04:12.800 --> 00:04:20.000 + +For he's a jolly good fellow, For he's a jolly good fellow, For he's a jolly good fellow... + +00:04:20.000 --> 00:04:22.000 + +(off) Which nobody can deny. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_27__Whicker's_World/2_Icelandic_saga.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_27__Whicker's_World/2_Icelandic_saga.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..7ab0ac03 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_27__Whicker's_World/2_Icelandic_saga.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,188 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Skit starts at anchor #2 and includes Parts II and IV narrative surrounding North Malden interruptions until next anchor. + +00:04:30.000 --> 00:04:33.000 +[caption] 'NJORL'S SAGA -- PART II' + +00:04:33.000 --> 00:04:37.000 +[action] Pan across a bleak landscape. + +00:04:37.000 --> 00:04:46.000 + +This little-known Icelandic saga, written by an unknown hand in the late thirteenth century, has remained undiscovered until today. Now it comes to your screens for the first time. Fresh from the leaves of Iceland's history. The terrible 'Njorl's Saga'. + +00:04:46.000 --> 00:04:48.500 + +It's not that terrible. + +00:04:48.500 --> 00:04:51.500 + +No, I meant terribly violent. + +00:04:51.500 --> 00:04:53.000 + +Oh yeah, yeah. + +00:04:53.000 --> 00:04:59.000 +[action] A Viking has great difficulty mounting his horse. + +00:04:59.000 --> 00:05:20.000 + +Erik Njorl, son of Frothgar, leaves his home to seek Hangar the Elder at the home of Thorvald Nlodvisson, the son of Gudleif, half brother of Thorgier, the priest of Ljosa water, who took to wife Thurunn, the mother of Thorkel Braggart, the slayer of Cudround the powerful, who knew Howal, son of Geernon, son of Erik from Valdalesc, son of Arval Gristlebeard, son of Harken, who killed Bjortguaard in Sochnadale in Norway over Cudreed, daughter of Thorkel Long, the son of Kettle-Trout, the half son of Harviyoun Half-troll, father of Ingbare the Brave, who with Isenbert of Gottenberg the daughter of Hangbard the Fierce ... + +00:05:20.000 --> 00:05:30.000 + +I must apologize for an error in the saga. Evidently Thorgier, the Priest of Ljosa water who took to wife Thurunn, the mother of Thorkel Braggart, the slayer of Gudmund the powerful, who knew Howal, son of Geernon, son of Erik from Vadalesc ... + +00:05:30.000 --> 00:05:36.000 +[action] The Viking and horse look exasperated; still not mounted. + +00:05:36.000 --> 00:05:45.000 + +Well I'm afraid we're having a little trouble getting this very exciting Icelandic saga started. If any of you at home have any ideas about how to get this exciting saga started again here's the address to write to: + +00:05:45.000 --> 00:05:48.000 + +Help the Exciting Icelandic Saga, 18b MacNorten Buildings, Oban. + +00:05:48.000 --> 00:05:55.000 +[caption] HELP THE EXCITING ICELANDIC SAGA, c/o MATCH OF THE DAY, BBC TV, THE LARCHES, 26 WESTBROOK AVENUE, FAVERSHAM, KENT + +00:05:55.000 --> 00:06:03.000 +[action] Announcer at desk; secretary sprays deodorant on her bust. + +00:06:03.000 --> 00:06:08.000 + +(to camera) Hello, well I was the third voice you heard just now. I'm sorry about that terrible mess. + +00:06:08.000 --> 00:06:11.000 + +Well it wasn't all that terrible. + +00:06:11.000 --> 00:06:14.000 + +No, no, I meant terrible in the sense of unfortunate. + +00:06:14.000 --> 00:06:15.500 + +Oh. + +00:06:15.500 --> 00:06:25.000 + +Anyway, our plea for assistance has been answered by the North Malden Icelandic Saga Society who've given us some very useful information about the saga and so we carry on now with 'Njorl's Saga' with our thanks going, once again, to the North Maiden Icelandic Saga Society. + +00:06:25.000 --> 00:06:33.000 +[action] Erik sleeps standing by his home. + +00:06:33.000 --> 00:06:58.000 + +Erik Njorl, son of Frothgar rode off into the desolate plain. Day and night he rode, looking neither to right nor left. Stopping neither for food nor rest. Twelve days and nights he rode. Through rain and storm. Through wind and snow beyond the enchanted waterfall, through the elfin glades until he reached his goal. He had found the rich and pleasant land beyond the mountains, the land where golden streams sang their way through fresh green meadows. Where there were halls and palaces, an excellent swimming pool and one of the most attractive bonus incentive schemes for industrial development in the city. Only fifteen miles from excellent Thames-side docking facilities and within easy reach of the proposed M25. Here it was that Erik Njorl, son of Frothgar, met the mayor. Mr Arthur Huddinut, a local solicitor. + +00:06:58.000 --> 00:07:03.000 +[action] Erik rides to town hall; the mayor approaches. + +00:07:03.000 --> 00:07:13.000 + +Welcome to North Malden. Yes, everyone is welcome to North Malden, none more so than the businessmen and investors who shape our society of the future. Here at North Malden... + +00:07:13.000 --> 00:07:23.000 + +And we apologize to viewers of 'Njorl's Saga' who may be confused by some of the references to North Malden. After a frank exchange of views we have agreed to carry on showing this version supplied to us by the North Malden Icelandic Saga Society on the undertaking that future scenes will adhere more closely to the spirit of twelfth-century Iceland. + +00:07:23.000 --> 00:07:26.000 +[caption] Film leader countdown (5,4,3...) + +00:07:26.000 --> 00:07:46.000 + +With moist eyes, Erik leaves this happy land to return to the harsh uneconomic realities of life in the land of Ljosa waters. On his way Erik rested a while in the land of Bjornsstrand - the land of dark forces, where Gildor was King. These were the dukes of the land of Bjornsstrand. Proud warriors who bore on their chests the letters of their dread name. + +00:07:46.000 --> 00:07:50.000 +[action] Knights reveal M.A.L.D.E.N letters; Erik battles them. + +00:07:50.000 --> 00:07:53.000 + +Hello? Is that the North Malden Icelandic Society? + +00:07:53.000 --> 00:07:55.500 + +Yes, that's right. + +00:07:55.500 --> 00:07:57.000 + +About this saga. + +00:07:57.000 --> 00:07:59.500 + +Oh yes, the Icelandic saga. + +00:07:59.500 --> 00:08:00.800 + +Yes. + +00:08:00.800 --> 00:08:02.800 + +Good, isn't it. + +00:08:02.800 --> 00:08:08.000 + +Well er, I don't know, but you promised us that you would stick to the spirit of the original text. + +00:08:08.000 --> 00:08:10.500 + +Yes, that's right. + +00:08:10.500 --> 00:08:15.000 + +Well I mean a lot of these things that are happening, well they just don't quite ring true. + +00:08:15.000 --> 00:08:17.000 +[sign] 'Malden, Gateway to Industry'. + +00:08:17.000 --> 00:08:19.500 + +Well, it's a new interpretation really. + +00:08:19.500 --> 00:08:21.500 +[sign] 'ICI thanks Malden'. + +00:08:21.500 --> 00:08:25.000 + +Well we don't want a new... + +00:08:25.000 --> 00:08:26.500 +[flash] INVEST IN MALDEN + +00:08:26.500 --> 00:08:31.000 + +... I mean we wanted the proper thing... I mean just look what's happening now. + +00:08:31.000 --> 00:08:34.000 +[banners] 'Invest in Malden', 'Malden - 45% Interest Free Loans'. + +00:08:34.000 --> 00:08:38.000 + +Banners were a very important part of Icelandic lore, Mr Mills. + +00:08:38.000 --> 00:08:44.000 + +No, no, I'm sorry I, I can't accept that, it's gone too far, I'm very sorry but we'll have to terminate the agreement. You're just trying to cash in on the BBC's exciting Icelandic saga. + +00:08:44.000 --> 00:08:47.000 +[action] Knights carry more advertising banners and signs. + +00:08:47.000 --> 00:08:49.500 + +That's business, Mr Mills. + +00:08:49.500 --> 00:08:53.000 + +Well, that's as maybe but it's not the way the BBC works. + +00:08:53.000 --> 00:08:56.000 + +Well I'm sorry you feel that way but er, you know, if you ever want to come to Malden... + +00:08:56.000 --> 00:08:57.500 +[flash] INVEST IN MALDEN + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_27__Whicker's_World/3_Court_scene_(Viking).vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_27__Whicker's_World/3_Court_scene_(Viking).vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..e617ef12 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_27__Whicker's_World/3_Court_scene_(Viking).vtt @@ -0,0 +1,209 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Skit starts at anchor #3 and runs through the courtroom sequence with Njorl disappearing. + +00:09:00.000 --> 00:09:03.000 +[caption] 'NJORL'S SAGA -- PART III' + +00:09:03.000 --> 00:09:08.000 +[music] Usual dramatic music fades up on courtroom. + +00:09:08.000 --> 00:09:19.000 + +8 o'clock is a peak viewing hour so naturally we tend to stick to our comedy output - unless of course there's sport - because of course we know this is popular, and popularity is what television is about. Quite frankly I'm sick and tired of people accusing us of being ratings conscious. + +00:09:19.000 --> 00:09:21.000 + +(to the clerk of the court) Ratings conscious? + +00:09:21.000 --> 00:09:23.000 + +Transmitting bland garbage, m'lud. + +00:09:23.000 --> 00:09:24.500 + +Thank you. + +00:09:24.500 --> 00:09:30.000 + +Now I'm really cheesed off. I mean it's not your high-brow bleeding plays that pull in the viewers, you know. + +00:09:30.000 --> 00:09:31.500 + +(bored) Thank you. + +00:09:31.500 --> 00:09:36.500 + +I mean Joe Public doesn't want to sit down and watch three hours of documentaries every evening. + +00:09:36.500 --> 00:09:37.800 + +Thank you. + +00:09:37.800 --> 00:09:44.000 + +He wants to sit down and he wants to be entertained, he doesn't want a load... No really - I'm absolutely fed up with this. I really am. + +00:09:44.000 --> 00:09:46.000 + +(banging gavel) Case dismissed. + +00:09:46.000 --> 00:09:48.500 + +Case dismissed, m'lud? + +00:09:48.500 --> 00:09:50.000 + +Oh all right, five years. + +00:09:50.000 --> 00:09:52.000 + +Thank you, m'lud. + +00:09:52.000 --> 00:09:54.000 + +Call the next case please. + +00:09:54.000 --> 00:09:57.000 + +Call Erik Njorl, son of Frothgar, brother of Hangnor... (etc.). + +00:09:57.000 --> 00:10:00.000 + +Call Erik Njorl ... (etc.), + +00:10:00.000 --> 00:10:03.000 + +(off) Call Erik Njorl ... (etc.). + +00:10:03.000 --> 00:10:07.000 +[action] Erik enters, totally bandaged, wearing Viking fur hat. Usher approaches with card and Bible. + +00:10:07.000 --> 00:10:09.500 + +You are Erik Njorl, son of Frothgar... + +00:10:09.500 --> 00:10:11.000 + +Get on with it! + +00:10:11.000 --> 00:10:13.000 + +Will you raise your right hand. + +00:10:13.000 --> 00:10:18.000 + +He obviously can't raise his right hand, you silly usher person... can you raise your right leg Mr Njorl? + +00:10:18.000 --> 00:10:19.500 +[action] Njorl shakes his head. + +00:10:19.500 --> 00:10:22.000 + +Can you raise any part of your body, Mr Njorl? + +00:10:22.000 --> 00:10:25.000 +[action] Njorl leans and whispers to the usher. + +00:10:25.000 --> 00:10:30.000 + +I see... well, we'll skip that... well, just take the book in your right hand Mr Njorl without raising any part of your body... Oh .... + +00:10:30.000 --> 00:10:32.500 + +What is it now, you persistently silly usher? + +00:10:32.500 --> 00:10:34.500 + +He can't hold the Bible m'lud. + +00:10:34.500 --> 00:10:41.000 + +Well screw the Bible! Let's get on with this bleeding trial, I've got a Gay Lib meeting at 6 o'clock. Superintendent Lufthansa will you please read the charge. + +00:10:41.000 --> 00:10:43.500 + +Is a charge strictly necessary, m'lud? + +00:10:43.500 --> 00:10:45.500 + +(heavy aside) The press is here. + +00:10:45.500 --> 00:10:53.000 + +Oh sorry! Right, here we go. You are hereby charged. One, that you did, on or about 1126, conspire to publicize a London Borough in the course of a BBC saga; two, that you were wilfully and persistently a foreigner; three, that you conspired to do things not normally considered illegal; four, that you were caught in possession of an offensive weapon, viz, the big brown table down at the police station. + +00:10:53.000 --> 00:10:55.000 + +The big brown table down at the police station? + +00:10:55.000 --> 00:10:58.500 + +It's the best we could find, m'lud ... and five... all together now... + +00:10:58.500 --> 00:11:00.500 + +Assaulting a police officer! + +00:11:00.500 --> 00:11:09.000 + +Call Police Constable Pan-Am. Into the witness box, constable ... there'll be plenty of time for that later on. Now, you are Police Constable Pan-Am? + +00:11:09.000 --> 00:11:13.000 + +No, I shall deny that to the last breath in my body. Oh. Sorry, yes. + +00:11:13.000 --> 00:11:15.500 + +Police constable, do you recognize the defendant? + +00:11:15.500 --> 00:11:20.000 + +No. Never seen him before in my life. Oh , yes, yes he's the one. He done it. I'd recognize him anywhere, sorry, super. + +00:11:20.000 --> 00:11:23.500 + +Constable, will you please tell the court in your own words what happened? + +00:11:23.500 --> 00:11:36.000 + +Oh yes! I was proceeding in a northerly direction up Alitalia Street when I saw the deceased standing at an upstairs window, baring her bosom at the general public. She then took off her ... wait a tick. Wrong story. Ho yes! There were three nuns in a railway compartment and the ticket inspector says to one of them. No, anyway I clearly saw the deceased... + +00:11:36.000 --> 00:11:37.500 + +Defendant. + +00:11:37.500 --> 00:11:48.000 + +Defendant! Sorry. Sorry, super. I clearly saw the defendant ... doing whatever he's accused of...Red-handed. When kicked... he said: 'It's a fair ... cop, I done it all ... Right... no doubt about... that'. Then, bound as he was to the chair, he assaulted myself and three other constables while bouncing around the cell. The end. + +00:11:48.000 --> 00:11:51.000 +[applause] Spontaneous applause. Shouts of 'more! more!' + +00:11:51.000 --> 00:11:53.000 + +Thank you, thank you... and for my next piece of evidence... + +00:11:53.000 --> 00:11:55.500 + +I think you'd better leave it there, constable. + +00:11:55.500 --> 00:12:07.000 + +Excellent evidence, constable ... Thank you very much. Now then Mr Njorl, will you tell the court please where were you on the night of 1126? Move any part of your body if you were north of a line from the Humbet to the Mersey. + +00:12:07.000 --> 00:12:12.000 + +Is he in there, d'you think? . .. Hello... Hello! Defendant, are you there ... coo-ee! De-fend-ant... I think you'd better go and have a look, Maurice. + +00:12:12.000 --> 00:12:13.500 + +Don't call me Maurice in court! + +00:12:13.500 --> 00:12:15.000 + +I'm sorry. + +00:12:15.000 --> 00:12:20.000 +[action] Clerk, counsel, and two policemen look inside the bandages; Njorl is gone, leaving a framework. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_27__Whicker's_World/4_Stock_Exchange_report.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_27__Whicker's_World/4_Stock_Exchange_report.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..0f9ee05a --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_27__Whicker's_World/4_Stock_Exchange_report.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,18 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Skit starts at anchor #4. + +00:12:25.000 --> 00:12:30.000 +[action] Animated sketch transitions to studio set; cheap graph 'Stock Market Report' visible. + +00:12:30.000 --> 00:12:33.000 + +And now the Stock Market Report by Exchange Telegraph. + +00:12:33.000 --> 00:13:20.000 + +Trading was crisp at the start of the day with some brisk business on the floor. Rubber hardened and string remained confident. Little bits of tin consolidated although biscuits sank after an early gain and stools remained anonymous. Armpits rallied well after a poor start. Nipples rose dramatically during the morning but had declined by mid-afternoon, while teeth clenched and buttocks remained firm. Small dark furry things increased severely on the floor, whilst rude jellies wobbled up and down, and bounced against rising thighs which had spread to all parts of the country by mid-afternoon. After lunch naughty things dipped sharply forcing giblets upwards with the nicky nacky noo. Ting tang tong rankled dithely, little tipples pooped and poppy things went pong! Gibble gabble gobble went the rickety rackety roo and ... + +00:13:20.000 --> 00:13:23.000 +[action] A bucketful of water drops on him. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_27__Whicker's_World/5_Mrs_Premise_and_Mrs_Conclusion_visit_Jean_Paul_Sartre.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_27__Whicker's_World/5_Mrs_Premise_and_Mrs_Conclusion_visit_Jean_Paul_Sartre.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..afdc5491 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_27__Whicker's_World/5_Mrs_Premise_and_Mrs_Conclusion_visit_Jean_Paul_Sartre.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,360 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Skit starts at anchor #5. + +00:13:30.000 --> 00:13:35.000 +[animation] Woman enters laundromat; cut to interior with shabby folk. + +00:13:35.000 --> 00:13:37.500 + +Hello, Mrs Premise. + +00:13:37.500 --> 00:13:39.500 + +Hello, Mrs Conclusion. + +00:13:39.500 --> 00:13:41.000 + +Busy day? + +00:13:41.000 --> 00:13:45.000 + +Busy! I've just spent four hours burying the cat. + +00:13:45.000 --> 00:13:47.000 + +Four hours to bury a cat? + +00:13:47.000 --> 00:13:52.000 + +Yes! It wouldn't keep still, wriggling about howling its head off. + +00:13:52.000 --> 00:13:54.000 + +Oh - it wasn't dead then? + +00:13:54.000 --> 00:13:59.000 + +Well, no, no, but it's not at all a well cat so as we were going away for a fortnight's holiday, I thought I'd better bury it just to be on the safe side. + +00:13:59.000 --> 00:14:05.000 + +Quite right. You don't want to come back from Sorento to a dead cat. It'd be so anticlimactic. Yes, kill it now, that's what I say. + +00:14:05.000 --> 00:14:06.500 + +Yes. + +00:14:06.500 --> 00:14:09.500 + +We're going to have our budgie put down. + +00:14:09.500 --> 00:14:11.500 + +Really? Is it very old? + +00:14:11.500 --> 00:14:14.500 + +No. We just don't like it. We're going to take it to the vet tomorrow. + +00:14:14.500 --> 00:14:17.000 + +Tell me, how do they put budgies down then? + +00:14:17.000 --> 00:14:23.000 + +Well it's funny you should ask that, but I've just been reading a great big book about how to put your budgie down, and apparently you can either hit them with the book, or, you can shoot them just there, just above the beak. + +00:14:23.000 --> 00:14:24.500 + +Just there! + +00:14:24.500 --> 00:14:26.000 + +Yes. + +00:14:26.000 --> 00:14:30.000 + +'Course, Mrs Essence flushed hers down the loo. + +00:14:30.000 --> 00:14:38.000 + +Ooh! No! You shouldn't do that - no that's dangerous. Yes, they breed in the sewers, and eventually you get evil-smelling flocks of huge soiled budgies flying out of people's lavatories infringing their personal freedom. Good morning Mrs Cut-out. + +00:14:38.000 --> 00:14:42.000 + +It's a funny thing freedom. I mean how can any of us be really free when we still have personal possessions. + +00:14:42.000 --> 00:14:46.000 + +You can't. You can't. I mean, how can I go off and join Frelimo when I've got nine more installments to pay on the fridge. + +00:14:46.000 --> 00:14:49.000 + +No, you can't. You can't. Well this is the whole crux of Jean-Paul Sartre's 'Roads to Freedom'. + +00:14:49.000 --> 00:14:54.000 + +No, it bloody isn't. The nub of that is, his characters stand for all of us in their desire to avoid action. Mind you, the man at the off-licence says it's an everyday story of French country folk. + +00:14:54.000 --> 00:14:56.000 + +What does he know? + +00:14:56.000 --> 00:14:57.500 + +Nothing. + +00:14:57.500 --> 00:15:03.000 + +Sixty new pence for a bottle of Maltese Claret. Well I personally think Jean-Paul's masterwork is an allegory of man's search for commitment. + +00:15:03.000 --> 00:15:04.500 + +No it isn't. + +00:15:04.500 --> 00:15:06.000 + +Yes it is. + +00:15:06.000 --> 00:15:07.000 + +Isn't. + +00:15:07.000 --> 00:15:08.000 + +'Tis. + +00:15:08.000 --> 00:15:09.000 + +No it isn't. + +00:15:09.000 --> 00:15:12.000 + +All right. We can soon settle this. We'll ask him. + +00:15:12.000 --> 00:15:13.500 + +Do you know him? + +00:15:13.500 --> 00:15:16.000 + +Yes, we met on holiday last year. + +00:15:16.000 --> 00:15:17.500 + +In Ibeezer? + +00:15:17.500 --> 00:15:23.000 + +Yes. He was staying there with his wife and Mr and Mr Genet. Oh, I did get on well with Madam S. We were like that. + +00:15:23.000 --> 00:15:25.000 + +What was Jean-Paul like? + +00:15:25.000 --> 00:15:35.000 + +Well, you know, a bit moody. Yes, he didn't join in the fun much. Just sat there thinking. Still, Mr Rotter caught him a few times with the whoopee cushion. Le Capitalisme et La Bourgeoisie ils sont la même chose... Oooh we did laugh. + +00:15:35.000 --> 00:15:37.500 + +Well, we'll give him a tinkle then. + +00:15:37.500 --> 00:15:40.500 + +Yes, all right. She said they were in the book. Where's the Paris telephone directory? + +00:15:40.500 --> 00:15:42.000 + +It's on the drier. + +00:15:42.000 --> 00:15:45.000 + +No, no, that's Budapest. Oh here we are Sartre ... Sartre. + +00:15:45.000 --> 00:15:47.000 + +It's 621036. + +00:15:47.000 --> 00:16:10.000 + +Oh, thank you, Mrs Varley. Hallo. Paris 621036 please and make it snappy, buster... (sings The Girl from Ipanema while waiting) Hallo? Hello Mrs Sartre. It's Beulagh Premise here. Oh, pardon, c'est Beulagh Premise ici, oui, oui, dans Ibeezer. Oui, we met... nous nous recontrons au Hotel Miramar. Oui, à la barbeque, c'est vrai. Madame S. - est-ce que Jean est chez vous? Oh merde. When will he be free? Oh pardon. Quand sera-t-il libre? Oooooh. Ha ha ha ha She says he's spent the last sixty years trying to work that one out. Très amusant, Madam S. Oui absolument... à bientôt. Well he's out distributing pamphlets to the masses but he'll be in at six. + +00:16:10.000 --> 00:16:12.500 + +Oh well, I'll ring BEA then. + +00:16:12.500 --> 00:16:16.000 +[action] Cut to them on a raft in mid-ocean. + +00:16:16.000 --> 00:16:17.500 + +Oh look, Paris! + +00:16:17.500 --> 00:16:21.000 +[caption] 'North Malden Welcomes Careful Coastal Craft' sign on seashore. + +00:16:21.000 --> 00:16:24.000 + +That's not Paris. Jean-Paul wouldn't live here. It's a right old dump. + +00:16:24.000 --> 00:16:34.000 + +But this is where they were wrong. For this was no old dump, but a town with a future, an urban El Dorado where the businessmen of today can enjoy the facilities of tomorrow in the comfort of yesterday. Provided by a go-getting, go-ahead council who know just how loud money can talk. Interest rates are so low... + +00:16:34.000 --> 00:16:43.000 + +Well it's none of my business but we had the same trouble with one of our Icelandic sagas. These people are terribly keen but they do rather tend to take over. I think I'd stick to Caribbean Islands if I were you. Fine... and now back to the saga. + +00:16:43.000 --> 00:16:45.000 +[caption] 'NJORL'S SAGA - PART IV' + +00:16:45.000 --> 00:16:50.000 +[music] Thundering music. Icelandic seashore. Pepperpots walk into shot. + +00:16:50.000 --> 00:16:53.000 + +Here - this is not Paris, this is Iceland. + +00:16:53.000 --> 00:16:57.000 + +Oh, well, Paris must be over there then. + +00:16:57.000 --> 00:17:03.000 +[montage] Eiffel Tower; French street with berets and loaves; they read apartment list. + +00:17:03.000 --> 00:17:14.000 + +Oh, here we are, Number 25 .... Flat 1, Duke and Duchess of Windsor, Flat 2, Yves Montand, Flat 3, Jacques Cousteau, Flat 4, Jean Genet and Friend, Flat 5, Maurice Laroux... + +00:17:14.000 --> 00:17:15.500 + +Who's he? + +00:17:15.500 --> 00:17:20.000 + +Never heard of him. Flat 6, Marcel Marceau, 'Walking Against the Wind' Ltd. Flat 7, Indira Gandhi? + +00:17:20.000 --> 00:17:22.000 + +She gets about a bit, doesn't she? + +00:17:22.000 --> 00:17:24.000 + +Yes, Flat 8, Jean-Paul and Betty-Muriel Sartre. + +00:17:24.000 --> 00:17:26.000 + +[intercom] Oui. + +00:17:26.000 --> 00:17:29.500 + +C'est nous, Betty-Muriel, excusez que nous sorerues en retard. + +00:17:29.500 --> 00:17:31.000 + +Entrez. + +00:17:31.000 --> 00:17:32.500 +[buzzer] + +00:17:32.500 --> 00:17:33.800 + +Oui, merci. + +00:17:33.800 --> 00:17:39.000 +[action] Inside Sartres' flat with books and papers; French song on radio. + +00:17:39.000 --> 00:17:40.500 + +Oh, rubbish. + +00:17:40.500 --> 00:17:42.000 + +Parlez vous Anglais? + +00:17:42.000 --> 00:17:44.500 + +Oh yes. Good day. Hello, love! + +00:17:44.500 --> 00:17:46.000 + +Hello! Oh this is Mrs Conclusion from No. 46. + +00:17:46.000 --> 00:17:47.500 + +Nice to meet you, dear. + +00:17:47.500 --> 00:17:48.800 + +Hello. + +00:17:48.800 --> 00:17:50.500 + +How's the old man, then? + +00:17:50.500 --> 00:18:10.000 + +Oh, don't ask. He's in one of his bleeding moods. 'The bourgeoisie this is the bourgeoisie that' - he's like a little child sometimes. I was only telling the Rainiers the other day - course he's always rude to them, only classy friends we've got - I was saying solidarity with the masses I said... pie in the sky! Oooh! You're not a Marxist are you Mrs Conclusion? + +00:18:10.000 --> 00:18:11.500 + +No, I'm a Revisionist. + +00:18:11.500 --> 00:18:20.000 + +Oh good. I mean, look at this place! I'm at my wits end. Revolutionary leaflets everywhere. One of these days I'll revolutionary leaflets him. If it wasn't for the goat you couldn't get in here for propaganda. + +00:18:20.000 --> 00:18:22.000 +[action] Goat munches leaflets in the corner. + +00:18:22.000 --> 00:18:24.000 + +Oh very well. Can we pop in and have a word with him? + +00:18:24.000 --> 00:18:25.500 + +Yes come along. + +00:18:25.500 --> 00:18:26.800 + +Thank you. + +00:18:26.800 --> 00:18:32.000 + +But be careful. He's had a few. Mind you he's as good as gold in the morning, I've got to hand it to him, but come lunchtime it's a bottle of vin ordinaire - six glasses and he's ready to agitate. + +00:18:32.000 --> 00:18:35.000 +[action] They knock on Jean-Paul's door. + +00:18:35.000 --> 00:18:38.000 + +Coo-ee! Jean-Paul? Jean-Paul! It's only us. Oh pardon ... c'est même nous... + +00:18:38.000 --> 00:18:39.500 + +Oui. + +00:18:39.500 --> 00:18:44.000 + +Jean-Paul. Your famous trilogy 'Rues à Liberté, is it an allegory of man's search for commitment? + +00:18:44.000 --> 00:18:45.500 + +Oui. + +00:18:45.500 --> 00:18:47.000 + +I told you so. + +00:18:47.000 --> 00:18:48.500 + +Oh coitus. + +00:18:48.500 --> 00:18:52.000 +[stock] Plane taking off. + +00:18:52.000 --> 00:18:54.000 +[caption] THE END + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_27__Whicker's_World/6_Whicker_Island.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_27__Whicker's_World/6_Whicker_Island.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..4c47cc15 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_27__Whicker's_World/6_Whicker_Island.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,146 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Skit starts at anchor #6. + +00:19:00.000 --> 00:19:05.000 +[stock] Jet landing intro shot leading into tropical island of Whickers. + +00:19:05.000 --> 00:19:07.500 +[caption] WHICKER'S WORLD + +00:19:07.500 --> 00:19:11.000 +[action] Various Whickers pace past camera. + +00:19:11.000 --> 00:19:14.500 + +Today we look at a vanishing race. A problem people who are fast disappearing off the face of the earth. + +00:19:14.500 --> 00:19:17.500 + +A race who one might say are losing a winning battle. + +00:19:17.500 --> 00:19:20.500 + +They live in a sunshine paradise, a Caribbean dream, where only reality is missing. + +00:19:20.500 --> 00:19:22.500 + +For this is Whicker Island. + +00:19:22.500 --> 00:19:26.000 + +An island inhabited entirely by ex-international interviewers in pursuit of the impossible dream. + +00:19:26.000 --> 00:19:28.500 + +The whole problem of Whicker Island is here in a nutshell. + +00:19:28.500 --> 00:19:30.500 + +There are just too many Whickers. + +00:19:30.500 --> 00:19:31.800 + +The light-weight suits. + +00:19:31.800 --> 00:19:33.000 + +The old school tie. + +00:19:33.000 --> 00:19:35.500 + +The practised voice of the seasoned campaigner. + +00:19:35.500 --> 00:19:37.500 + +Cannot hide the basic tragedy here. + +00:19:37.500 --> 00:19:40.500 + +There just aren't enough rich people left to interview. + +00:19:40.500 --> 00:19:44.000 +[action] Different location. + +00:19:44.000 --> 00:19:49.000 + +You can't teach an old dog new tricks and so you find them... + +00:19:49.000 --> 00:19:52.000 + +(seated by swimming pool) Sitting beside elegant swimming pools... + +00:19:52.000 --> 00:19:54.500 + +(seated at drinks table) ... sipping Martinis... + +00:19:54.500 --> 00:19:57.500 + +(standing by the pool) .. and waiting for the inevitable interview. + +00:19:57.500 --> 00:20:01.000 + +(standing fully clothed in the pool) I talked to the island's only white man, Father Pierre. + +00:20:01.000 --> 00:20:06.000 +[action] Heat shimmers; Third Whicker beside robed priest. + +00:20:06.000 --> 00:20:14.000 + +Father Pierre, why did you stay on in this colonial Campari-land where the clink of glasses mingles with the murmur of a million mosquitoes, where waterfalls of whisky wash away the worries of a world-weary Whicker, where gin and tonic jingle in a gyroscopic jubilee of something beginning with J - Father Pierre, why did you stay on here? + +00:20:14.000 --> 00:20:17.000 + +(puts on Whicker-style glasses) Well mainly for the interviews. + +00:20:17.000 --> 00:20:19.500 + +Well there you have it, a crumbling... + +00:20:19.500 --> 00:20:21.500 + +... empire in the sun-drenched... + +00:20:21.500 --> 00:20:23.500 + +Caribbean, where the clichés sparkle on the waters... + +00:20:23.500 --> 00:20:25.500 + +... like the music of repeat fees... + +00:20:25.500 --> 00:20:26.800 + +And so... + +00:20:26.800 --> 00:20:28.000 + +... from Whicker Island... + +00:20:28.000 --> 00:20:29.000 + +... it's... + +00:20:29.000 --> 00:20:29.800 + +... fare... + +00:20:29.800 --> 00:20:30.800 + +... well and... + +00:20:30.800 --> 00:20:31.800 + +... bon... + +00:20:31.800 --> 00:20:33.000 + +. .. voy... + +00:20:33.000 --> 00:20:34.000 + +... age. + +00:20:34.000 --> 00:20:38.000 +[stock] Whicker plane takes off; roll 'Whicker's World' styled credits. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_28/0_Episode28_head_tail.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_28/0_Episode28_head_tail.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..dae7c57b --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_28/0_Episode28_head_tail.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,43 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Intro titles and end credits head/tail material for Episode 28 + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:03.000 +[CAPTION] THE KON-TIKI / RA 1 / RA 2 / AND NOW ... / MR AND MRS BRIAN NORRIS' FORD POPULAR + +00:00:03.000 --> 00:00:08.000 +[ACTION] Pull back from a little Ford Popular to reveal Mr and Mrs Norris outside a suburban semi. + +00:01:25.000 --> 00:01:27.500 + +And now... + +00:01:27.500 --> 00:01:29.500 + +It's... + +00:01:29.500 --> 00:01:40.000 +[ACTION] Animated titles. + +00:01:40.000 --> 00:01:43.000 + +Monty Python's Flying Circus. + +00:28:40.000 --> 00:28:44.000 +[ACTION] Showbiz music. Spangly set. Lulu and Ringo on sofas. + +00:28:44.000 --> 00:28:48.000 + +Tonight from London your special guests are Lulu, Ringo Starr and the man you've all been waiting for - your host for tonight... + +00:28:48.000 --> 00:28:51.000 + +Love the outfit dear, it's gorgeous... + +00:28:51.000 --> 00:28:53.500 + +Hello, good evening, welcome. It's... + +00:28:53.500 --> 00:29:05.000 +[ACTION] Signature tune and opening animated titles roll over the It's Man. Guests walk off; he tries to stop the titles and drag them back; sits as music ends. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_28/10_World_War_One.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_28/10_World_War_One.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..6028f37c --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_28/10_World_War_One.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,102 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit 10: Underwater WWII/WWI fish sequence and ship evacuation gag + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[ACTION] ANIMATION underwater: Michael sinks; swallowed by a fish with a swastika. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:13.000 + +Welcome aboard, Britisher pig... tell us all you know about certain allied shipping routes, ja? Come on, talk! + +00:00:13.000 --> 00:00:16.000 +[ACTION] Nazi fish swallowed by RAF fish. + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:23.000 + +Hello, Fritz. Tables seem to have turned, old chap... tell us about... + +00:00:23.000 --> 00:00:26.000 +[ACTION] British fish swallowed by Chinese fish. + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:33.000 + +Ah, gleetings, capitalist dog; very sorry but must inform you, you are now prisoner of People's Republic. + +00:00:33.000 --> 00:00:38.000 + +Am very sorry, comrade commando, but we have just picked up capitalist ship on ladar scanner. + +00:00:38.000 --> 00:00:46.000 +[ACTION] Chinese fish bites a liner; film of big liner sinking in storm; panic and dramatic music. + +00:00:46.000 --> 00:00:51.000 + +This is your captain speaking. There is no need for panic. Women and children first. I repeat that, women and children first. + +00:00:51.000 --> 00:00:59.000 +[ACTION] Bridge: officers scramble into ladies' clothes or children's outfits as ship rolls. + +00:00:59.000 --> 00:01:02.000 + +Do not rush for the lifeboats - remember, women and children first. + +00:01:02.000 --> 00:01:05.000 + +And Red Indians! + +00:01:05.000 --> 00:01:10.000 + +What did you have to get dressed up like that for? + +00:01:10.000 --> 00:01:12.000 + +It was the only thing left. + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:16.000 + +Women, children and Red Indians... + +00:01:16.000 --> 00:01:18.000 + +And spacemen! + +00:01:18.000 --> 00:01:34.000 + +Here is a revised list. Women, children, Red Indians and spacemen... what's that meant to be? + +00:01:34.000 --> 00:01:44.000 + +Well it's a sort of impression of what a kind of Renaissance courtier artist might have looked like at the court of the Medicis or the Borgias... + +00:01:44.000 --> 00:01:52.000 + +No it's not, it's more Flemish than Italian. + +00:01:52.000 --> 00:01:58.000 + +Yes - that's a Flemish merchant of the fifteenth or sixteenth centuries... + +00:01:58.000 --> 00:02:04.000 + +What! With these tassles? + +00:02:04.000 --> 00:02:11.000 + +Yes, yes. They had those fine doublets tapering into full hose — exactly like that. + +00:02:11.000 --> 00:02:24.000 + +Don't panic. Now, what is it meant to be? Is it a Flemish merchant? + +00:02:24.000 --> 00:02:29.000 + +No, it's more an idealized version of the complete Renaissance Man... + +00:02:29.000 --> 00:02:41.000 + +All right! [PA] Do not rush for the lifeboats... women, children, Red Indians, spacemen, and a sort of idealized version of complete Renaissance Men first! + +00:02:41.000 --> 00:02:45.000 +[CAPTION] A FEW DAYS LATER + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_28/11_The_BBC_is_short_of_money.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_28/11_The_BBC_is_short_of_money.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..b17fd563 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_28/11_The_BBC_is_short_of_money.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,83 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit 11: Police chief budget gag; poverty-stricken BBC newsreader; return to police office without trousers + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[ACTION] Police chief's office in a South American police state. Prisoners shoved in. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:10.000 + +Flemish merchants did not wear hand-embroidered chevrons. They did not! + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:33.000 + +Yes, Gomez? [reads] Vee found zem valking on zee beach, my capitain... You see the BBC has to pay an actor twenty guineas if he speaks and it makes a bit of a hole in the budget... + +00:00:33.000 --> 00:00:36.000 + +Twenty-eight guineas, sir! Ooh, sorry. + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:39.000 + +You fool Gomez - that's twenty-eight guineas ... + +00:00:39.000 --> 00:00:41.500 + +What about me, sir? + +00:00:41.500 --> 00:00:44.500 + +Are you supposed to speak? + +00:00:44.500 --> 00:00:47.000 + +No, sir. + +00:00:47.000 --> 00:00:53.000 + +But you've just spoken! + +00:00:53.000 --> 00:01:03.000 + +Oh, sorry, sir. + +00:01:03.000 --> 00:01:11.000 +[SFX] Stunt: guard rushes through window with scream and breaking glass. + +00:01:11.000 --> 00:01:16.000 + +What did he do that for? + +00:01:16.000 --> 00:01:20.000 + +It's a stunt, sir, an extra twenty guineas. + +00:01:20.000 --> 00:01:25.000 + +Look! We can't afford it! The BBC are short of money as it is. + +00:01:25.000 --> 00:01:31.000 +[ACTION] Cut to 'News at Nine' set with bare bulb. Newsreader shivering in blanket. + +00:01:31.000 --> 00:01:47.000 + +The BBC wishes to deny rumours that it is going into liquidation... Huw Weldon's watch has been accepted by the London Electricity Board and transmissions can continue as planned. + +00:01:47.000 --> 00:01:51.000 +[SFX] Knocking on the door. + +00:01:51.000 --> 00:01:54.000 + +Are you going to be in there all night? + +00:01:54.000 --> 00:02:03.000 + +It's just a bulletin, Mr Kelly... and now back to the Story... All right! + +00:02:03.000 --> 00:02:11.000 +[ACTION] Back to police chief's office; same crowd pushed in, no trousers. + +00:02:11.000 --> 00:02:14.000 + +ve found ze men, valking on ze beach, my capitain. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_28/12_Puss_in_Boots.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_28/12_Puss_in_Boots.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..ef11a1da --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_28/12_Puss_in_Boots.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,168 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit 12: Panto crash into Venezuelan police drama; Horse of the Year Show; eviction head/credits + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[ACTION] Panto principal boy enters with stuffed cat; group forms arrowhead and presents. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:07.500 + +It's ... Puss! + +00:00:07.500 --> 00:00:09.000 + +Hello, Puss! + +00:00:09.000 --> 00:00:11.000 + +Hello, children! + +00:00:11.000 --> 00:00:16.000 + +Stop! Stop this adaptation of 'Puss-in-Boots'! This is the Police Department of the State of Venezuela! + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:17.500 + +Oh no it isn't! + +00:00:17.500 --> 00:00:19.000 + +Oh, yes it is! + +00:00:19.000 --> 00:00:24.000 + +[CALL-AND-RESPONSE] Oh no it isn't! / Oh yes it is! (with kids) + +00:00:24.000 --> 00:00:31.000 + +Shut up! Shut up! [ACTION] Draws pistol; he has no trousers. Now I'm going to ask you some questions... we have ways of making you answer! + +00:00:31.000 --> 00:00:33.000 + +Like not paying twenty-eight guineas. + +00:00:33.000 --> 00:00:36.000 + +Shut up! Now, what ship are you from? + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:41.000 + +We are from the SS Mother Goose, we were twelve days out from Port of Spain, and I ... + +00:00:41.000 --> 00:00:44.000 +[ACTION] Door flung open; trouserless guard rushes in. + +00:00:44.000 --> 00:00:46.500 + +I got thirty bob for the trousers! + +00:00:46.500 --> 00:00:58.000 + +We are from SS Mother Goose... one night I was doing my usual rounds, when I passed the forward storage lockers... + +00:00:58.000 --> 00:01:09.000 +[ACTION] Eerie music; ripple and defocus transition... but they are still in the same set. + +00:01:09.000 --> 00:01:12.000 + +Go on! + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:33.000 + +I noticed something unusual... [ACTION] Three men in brown coats begin striking the set; flats fly revealing a boarding-house sitting room. + +00:01:33.000 --> 00:01:36.000 + +Could you sign this please? Thank you. + +00:01:36.000 --> 00:01:52.000 + +A small, small rat was ghastly and horrible and befurred... its little red eyes glinted... + +00:01:52.000 --> 00:02:00.000 +[ACTION] Set now gone; Mr and Mrs Kelly enter and peer in. + +00:02:00.000 --> 00:02:04.000 + +What's this about doing the 'Horse of the Year Show' in here tonight? + +00:02:04.000 --> 00:02:07.000 + +I'm sorry, Mrs Kelly. We don't know, I'm afraid - this is drama. + +00:02:07.000 --> 00:02:11.000 + +Mr Fox told me... they were doing 'Horse of the Year Show' in here tonight at 9.10. + +00:02:11.000 --> 00:02:12.500 + +This is BBC 2 + +00:02:12.500 --> 00:02:15.000 + +I think BBC 1 are in the kitchen. + +00:02:15.000 --> 00:02:19.000 + +Well, I'm not having Harvey Smith jumping over my binette. + +00:02:19.000 --> 00:02:21.000 + +No, come on. + +00:02:21.000 --> 00:02:25.000 + +... tearing at my throat, ripping my clothes... + +00:02:25.000 --> 00:02:27.000 + +And turn the gas off before you leave! + +00:02:27.000 --> 00:02:30.000 + +All right!! + +00:02:30.000 --> 00:02:36.000 + +I fought it with all my strength, but it was too much for me... + +00:02:36.000 --> 00:02:44.000 +[ACTION] Hallway: 'Horse of the Year Show' audio from kitchen as Mr and Mrs Kelly approach. + +00:02:44.000 --> 00:02:49.000 + +Another clear round for Harvey Smith on 'Orealley'. + +00:02:49.000 --> 00:02:54.000 + +And now it's Mrs David Barker riding 'Atalanta' Number 3. + +00:02:54.000 --> 00:02:59.000 +[SFX] Crash of pottery, falling pans, horse neighing. + +00:02:59.000 --> 00:03:12.000 + +Right! That's it! [ACTION] She bursts into kitchen; horse, Pat Hornsby Smith and commentator amid wrecked jump. She chases them out. + +00:03:12.000 --> 00:03:15.000 + +It's one of our most popular programmes. + +00:03:15.000 --> 00:03:18.000 + +That's what you think, Mr Fox! + +00:03:18.000 --> 00:03:21.000 + +Well, that's all from BBC Television for this evening... + +00:03:21.000 --> 00:03:26.000 +[ACTION] Mrs Kelly slams door on him. + +00:03:26.000 --> 00:03:34.000 + +Shove off! Go and find yourself another flat! Get out! + +00:03:34.000 --> 00:03:42.000 +[ACTION] Credits scribbled on tax form shoved through door; camera pans in; Mrs Kelly stamps on paper. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_28/1_Emigration_from_Surbiton_to_Hounslow.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_28/1_Emigration_from_Surbiton_to_Hounslow.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..1c045353 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_28/1_Emigration_from_Surbiton_to_Hounslow.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,84 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit 1: Mr and Mrs Brian Norris and the Surbiton to Hounslow expedition + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 +[CAPTION] THE KON-TIKI / RA 1 / RA 2 / AND NOW ... / MR AND MRS BRIAN NORRIS' FORD POPULAR + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:08.000 +[ACTION] Pull back from a Ford Popular to reveal Mr and Mrs Norris at their semi-detached house. + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:22.000 + +Who, a year ago, had heard of Mr and Mrs Brian Norris of 37, Gledhill Gardens, Parsons Green? And yet their epic journey in EBW 343 has set them alongside Thor Heyerdahl and Sir Edmund Hillary... + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:27.000 +[ACTION] Split-screen: two identical semis; similarly dressed suburbanites; similar speech. + +00:00:27.000 --> 00:00:30.000 + +Are you still running the GDBDMDB? + +00:00:30.000 --> 00:00:34.000 + +Yes, but I've had the excess nipples woppled to remove tamping. + +00:00:34.000 --> 00:00:36.000 + +Jolly good. + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:45.000 + +Were these just coincidences, or were they, as Mr Norris believed, part of an identical cultural background? One further discovery convinced him. The lawnmower. + +00:00:45.000 --> 00:00:47.500 + +I'm convinced. + +00:00:47.500 --> 00:00:50.500 + +But how to prove it. + +00:00:50.500 --> 00:00:53.000 + +But how to prove it. + +00:00:53.000 --> 00:01:09.000 + +There was only one way to see if the journey between Surbiton and Hounslow was possible... Months of preparation followed whilst Mr Norris researched in Putney Public Library, and Mrs Norris made sandwiches. + +00:01:09.000 --> 00:01:12.000 +[ACTION] Mr and Mrs Norris leave their home. + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:24.000 + +Finally, by April, they were ready. On the 23rd, they set out from 'Abide-A-Wee' to motor to Surbiton, watched by a crowd of local well-wishers. That evening they dined at Tooting. This would be the last they'd see of civilization. + +00:01:24.000 --> 00:01:30.000 +[ACTION] Close on diary pages. + +00:01:30.000 --> 00:01:37.000 + +7.30 Fed cat. 8.00 Breakfast. 8.30 Yes (successfully). 9.00 Set out on historic journey. + +00:01:37.000 --> 00:01:41.000 +[ACTION] Car passes sign: You are now leaving Surbiton, gateway to Esher. + +00:01:41.000 --> 00:02:12.000 + +On the morning of the 24th... the writing on the sign matched the AA book. During the long hours, Mrs Norris kept a photographic record and made sandwiches. Mile succeeded mile... by amazing luck, Mr Norris came across the Kingston by-pass. + +00:02:12.000 --> 00:02:42.000 + +Faced with two theories: via the Kingston by-pass or A308 to Hampton Wick. Both met a big obstacle — the Thames, lying like a silver turd between Richmond and Isleworth. After thought and dwindling coffee, Mr Norris spotted something: Metropolitan Railway. They boarded the 3.47. + +00:02:42.000 --> 00:03:10.000 + +Via Clapham, Fulham, Chiswick and Brentford, they approached Hounslow. On the platform, flag-planting and photos. Then, the accountant's instinct... and a timetable: Trains to Surbiton every half hour. It was Hounslow's inhabitants who had trekked south to Surbiton. + +00:03:10.000 --> 00:03:16.000 +[CAPTION] THE END + +00:03:16.000 --> 00:03:20.000 +[ACTION] Music crescendo. Nude organist strikes a chord. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_28/2_Schoolboys'_Life_Assurance_Company.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_28/2_Schoolboys'_Life_Assurance_Company.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..04749436 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_28/2_Schoolboys'_Life_Assurance_Company.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,71 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit 2: Headmaster confronts entrepreneurial schoolboys + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 +[ACTION] Headmaster's study. Knock on door; three schoolboys enter. + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:16.000 + +Knock, enter and approach. Right, it's come to my notice that certain boys have been running a unit-trust linked assurance scheme... the limited offer was oversubscribed eight times. + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:18.500 + +It was Tidwell's idea, sir. + +00:00:18.500 --> 00:00:23.000 + +Shut up, Stebbins! I haven't finished. Oh, by the way, congratulations on winning the Italian Grand Prix at Monza. + +00:00:23.000 --> 00:00:24.500 + +Thank you, sir. + +00:00:24.500 --> 00:00:36.000 + +Shut up. This sort of extra-curricular capitalist expansion has got to stop... Is that clear, Balderston? + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:37.500 + +Yes, sir. + +00:00:37.500 --> 00:00:44.000 + +Oh, and Balderston, next time you do a 'Panorama' Report on the Black Ghettos you must get an exeat form from Mr Dibley. + +00:00:44.000 --> 00:00:46.000 + +Sorry, sir. + +00:00:46.000 --> 00:01:07.000 + +Now, the reason I called you in is that my wife is having a little trouble with her waterworks... which one of you is the surgeon? + +00:01:07.000 --> 00:01:11.000 + +Oh, sir! Why don't you ask Stebbins? He's a gynaecologist. + +00:01:11.000 --> 00:01:13.500 + +Ooh! You rotten stinker, Tidwell! + +00:01:13.500 --> 00:01:21.000 + +Is this true, Stebbins? Are you a gynaecologist? + +00:01:21.000 --> 00:01:23.000 + +Yes, sir. + +00:01:23.000 --> 00:01:29.000 + +Right, just the man. How much do you charge? + +00:01:29.000 --> 00:01:32.000 + +Thirty guineas, sir. + +00:01:32.000 --> 00:01:40.000 + +Excellent. Go see the wife, full examination, results by end of break. And don't pick your nose! + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_28/3_How_to_rid_the_world_of_all_known_diseases.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_28/3_How_to_rid_the_world_of_all_known_diseases.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..8a248c0e --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_28/3_How_to_rid_the_world_of_all_known_diseases.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,47 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit 3: 'How to do it' Blue Peter-style segment + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:05.000 +[ACTION] 'How to do it' set revealed with Noel, Jackie, Alan and a bloodhound. + +00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:06.500 + +Hello. + +00:00:06.500 --> 00:00:08.000 + +Hello. + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:22.000 + +Well, last week we showed you how to become a gynaecologist. And this week... how to play the flute, split an atom, construct a box girder bridge, irrigate the Sahara Desert... but first, here's Jackie to tell you how to rid the world of all known diseases. + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:23.500 + +Hello, Alan. + +00:00:23.500 --> 00:00:25.000 + +Hello, Jackie. + +00:00:25.000 --> 00:00:36.000 + +Well, first of all become a doctor and discover a marvellous cure for something, and then... make sure they get everything right so there'll never be any diseases ever again. + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:42.000 + +Thanks, Jackie. Great idea. How to play the flute. [ACTION] Picks up a flute. You blow there and move your fingers up and down here. + +00:00:42.000 --> 00:00:53.000 + +Great, great, Alan. Next week we'll show you how black and white people can live together in peace and harmony, and Alan will be in Moscow reconciling the Russians and the Chinese. So, until next week, cheerio. + +00:00:53.000 --> 00:00:55.000 + +Bye. + +00:00:55.000 --> 00:00:56.500 + +Bye. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_28/4_Mrs_Niggerbaiter_explodes.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_28/4_Mrs_Niggerbaiter_explodes.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..7cdd7430 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_28/4_Mrs_Niggerbaiter_explodes.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,68 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit 4: Stockbroker-belt sitting room; explosive social call + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:05.000 +[ACTION] Children's music. 'How to do it' set seen in corner of a posh sitting room. Two ladies with a photo album by the fire. + +00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:08.000 + +Oh, yes, he's such a clever little boy, just like his father. + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:10.500 + +D'you think so, Mrs Nigger-Baiter? + +00:00:10.500 --> 00:00:12.500 + +Oh yes, spitting image. + +00:00:12.500 --> 00:00:15.500 +[ACTION] Door opens; son enters. + +00:00:15.500 --> 00:00:18.500 + +Good afternoon, mother. Good afternoon, Mrs Nigger-Baiter. + +00:00:18.500 --> 00:00:20.500 + +Ooh, he's walking already! + +00:00:20.500 --> 00:00:27.000 + +Yes, he's such a clever little boy, aren't you? Coochy coochy coo... + +00:00:27.000 --> 00:00:30.000 + +Of course I talk, I'm Minister for Overseas Development. + +00:00:30.000 --> 00:00:38.000 +[ACTION] Rattle out; cooing continues over son's line. + +00:00:38.000 --> 00:00:41.000 + +Mother, could I have a quick cup of tea please. I have an important statement on Rhodesia to make in the Commons at six. + +00:00:41.000 --> 00:00:45.000 +[ACTION] Sudden off-screen explosion. Reveal: Mrs Nigger-Baiter's chair charred and smoking; upholstery smoulders. + +00:00:45.000 --> 00:00:47.500 + +Oh, Mrs Nigger-Baiter's exploded. + +00:00:47.500 --> 00:00:49.500 + +Good thing, too. + +00:00:49.500 --> 00:00:52.000 + +She was my best friend. + +00:00:52.000 --> 00:00:56.000 + +Oh, mother, don't be so sentimental. Things explode every day. + +00:00:56.000 --> 00:00:59.000 + +Yes, I suppose so. Anyway, I didn't really like her that much. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_28/5_Vicar_salesman.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_28/5_Vicar_salesman.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..eaabe374 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_28/5_Vicar_salesman.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,80 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit 5: A vicar door-to-door selling anything; doctor links + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:03.000 +[ACTION] Doorbell rings. Mrs S answers. A vicar with a suitcase. + +00:00:03.000 --> 00:00:07.000 + +Hello, I'm your new vicar. Can I interest you in any encyclopaedias? + +00:00:07.000 --> 00:00:10.000 + +Ah, no thank you. We're not Church people, thank you. + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:14.000 +[ACTION] Vicar opens suitcase: it's full of brushes. + +00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:18.000 + +How about brushes? Nylon or bristle? Strong-tufted, attractive colours. + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:20.000 + +No - really, thank you, vicar. + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:24.000 + +Oh dear ... Turkey? Cup final tickets? + +00:00:24.000 --> 00:00:26.000 + +No, no really, we're just not religious thank you. + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:28.000 + +Oh, well. Bye bye. + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:33.000 + +Remember, if you do want anything... jewellery, Ascot water heaters... + +00:00:33.000 --> 00:00:40.000 + +It's funny, isn't it? How your best friend can just blow up like that? I mean, you wouldn't think it was medically possible, would you? + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:43.000 +[ACTION] Cut to posh consulting room. + +00:00:43.000 --> 00:01:05.000 + +This is where Mrs Shazam was so wrong. Exploding is a perfectly normal medical phenomenon... athlete's foot can be cured by applying a small charge of TNT between each toe. [SFX] Doorbell. + +00:01:05.000 --> 00:01:11.000 + +Hello, I'm your new vicar, can I interest you in any of these watches, pens or biros? + +00:01:11.000 --> 00:01:16.000 + +No ... I'm not religious, I'm afraid. + +00:01:16.000 --> 00:01:21.000 + +Oh, souvenirs, badges... a little noddy dog for the back of the car? + +00:01:21.000 --> 00:01:24.000 + +No thank you, vicar. Good morning. + +00:01:24.000 --> 00:01:26.000 + +Oh, morning. + +00:01:26.000 --> 00:01:55.000 + +Now, many of the medical profession are sceptical about my work... but that doesn't mean that Pasteur was wrong! Look, I'll show you what I mean. + +00:01:55.000 --> 00:02:10.000 +[ACTION] ANIMATION: Skeleton complains, clips on a face and leaves diagram, wanders past warning signs, approaches sprocket holes, falls off edge of cartoon. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_28/6_Farming_club.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_28/6_Farming_club.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..5cb223c2 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_28/6_Farming_club.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,11 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit 6: Presenter introduces 'Farming Club' but does the Life of Tschaikowsky + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:05.000 +[ACTION] Artistic studio set. Screen behind; two-chair interview layout. + +00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:27.000 + +John Cobbley is the Musical and Artistic Director of Covent Garden... but first a Farming Club special, the life of Tschaikowsky. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_28/7_'Life_of_Tschaikowsky'.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_28/7_'Life_of_Tschaikowsky'.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..6fd9c876 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_28/7_'Life_of_Tschaikowsky'.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,67 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit 7: Farming Club special on Tchaikowsky, with presenters and experts + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[ACTION] Cue Tchaikowsky Piano Concerto No.1; farmyard stock film with roller caption. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:16.000 +[CAPTION] FARMING CLUB... PRESENTS: THE LIFE OF PETER ILYICH TSCHAIKOWSKY... + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:36.000 + +Tschaikowsky. Was he a tortured soul... or just an old poof who wrote tunes? Tonight on 'Farming Club' we're going to take an intimate look at Tschaikowsky and an intimate look at his friends. BBC Publications have a pamphlet: 'Hello Pianist'. + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:01:09.000 + +Peter Ilyich Tschaikowsky was born in 1840 in a Ken Russell film... sent to Moscow to study the piano and, when he'd finished that, the living room. Maurice takes up the story. + +00:01:09.000 --> 00:01:29.000 + +Well, guess what, the very next thing he did was to go to this extraordinary but extraordinary duckety-poos semi-Mondrian house in Robin Russia... + +00:01:29.000 --> 00:01:46.000 + +She was such a good composer that everybody, but everybody, wanted to know... Sleeping Beauty, Pathétique, 1812, and lots of concerti for violin and piano forte. + +00:01:46.000 --> 00:01:49.000 + +But what do we really know of this tortured ponce? + +00:01:49.000 --> 00:02:09.000 + +Well, if you can imagine the size of Nelson's Column... then Tschaikowsky was much smaller. His head was about the same size as that of an extremely large dog... or one medium-size rabbit if you count the whole body. + +00:02:09.000 --> 00:02:30.000 + +Here is a three-stage model of Tschaikowsky... legs for walking, jettisoned at night; the trunk with the naughty bits; and the small command module — the head. + +00:02:30.000 --> 00:02:31.500 + +Peter. + +00:02:31.500 --> 00:02:33.000 + +Simon. + +00:02:33.000 --> 00:02:34.500 + +Maurice. + +00:02:34.500 --> 00:02:46.000 + +Me. Well, poor pet, she was like a lost lamb in an abattoir. Eventually she died of cholera in St Petersburg, in great pain. + +00:02:46.000 --> 00:02:54.000 + +Here to play Tchaikowsky's first piano concerto in B Flat Minor is the world-famous soloist Sviatoslav Richter. During the performance he will escape from a sack, three padlocks and a pair of handcuffs. + +00:02:54.000 --> 00:03:10.000 +[ACTION] A chained figure in a sack rolls in and plays while wriggling free. 'Rita' enters; he escapes the sack while playing. Applause. + +00:03:10.000 --> 00:03:12.000 +[CAPTION] SVIATOSLAV RICHTER AND RITA + +00:03:12.000 --> 00:03:15.000 +[CAPTION] AND NOW + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_28/8_Trim-Jeans_Theatre.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_28/8_Trim-Jeans_Theatre.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..42c89b7b --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_28/8_Trim-Jeans_Theatre.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,94 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit 8: Trim-Jeans Theatre Presents + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 +[ACTION] Jolly showbiz music. Curtain up on three actors in trim-jeans, ad-style grouping. + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:07.000 +[CAPTION] TRIM-JEANS THEATRE PRESENTS + +00:00:07.000 --> 00:00:13.000 + +Good evening. This new series of 'Trim-Jeans Theatre Presents' will enable you to enjoy the poetry of T. S. Eliot whilst losing unsightly tummy bulge. Jean. + +00:00:13.000 --> 00:00:18.000 +[CAPTION] THESE THREE PEOPLE ARE REDUCING THEIR WAIST, THIGHS, HIPS AND ABDOMEN EVEN AS THEY RECOMMEND + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:20.500 + +Wow, yes and the inches stay off. Mark. + +00:00:20.500 --> 00:00:26.000 + +Terrific! Thrill to Thomas a Becket's Kierkegaardian moment of choice while making your physique tighter, firmer, neater. + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:30.000 +[ACTION] Cut to cathedral interior: priests, knights, women in trim-jeans; Thomas without. + +00:00:30.000 --> 00:00:32.500 + +I am here. No traitor to the King. + +00:00:32.500 --> 00:00:35.000 + +Absolve all those you have excommunicated. + +00:00:35.000 --> 00:00:37.000 + +Resign those powers you have arrogated. + +00:00:37.000 --> 00:00:39.000 + +Renew the obedience you have violated. + +00:00:39.000 --> 00:00:42.000 + +Lose inches off your hips, thighs, buttocks and abdomen. + +00:00:42.000 --> 00:00:44.000 + +A terrific product. + +00:00:44.000 --> 00:00:45.500 + +Terrific. + +00:00:45.500 --> 00:00:49.000 + +And this comes complete with the most revolutionary guarantee in slenderizing history! + +00:00:49.000 --> 00:00:55.000 +[ACTION] 'Before' shot: Kevin Francis in trim-jeans under 'Before' sign. + +00:00:55.000 --> 00:01:16.000 + +This was Kevin Francis before last season's 'Trim-Jean Play of the Month' production of 'The Seagull'... Three acts later, Kevin, as Trigorin, has lost over thirty-three inches. Wow. What a difference. That Anton Chekhov can certainly write. + +00:01:16.000 --> 00:01:19.000 + +Terrific. + +00:01:19.000 --> 00:01:21.000 + +Terrific. + +00:01:21.000 --> 00:01:33.000 + +Join us for a season of classic plays and rapid slenderizing. Enjoy Gielgud and Richardson losing fifteen inches in David Storey's 'Home'. + +00:01:33.000 --> 00:01:39.000 + +Enjoy 'The Trim Gentlemen of Verona' and 'Long Day's Journey into Night' while inches melt away. + +00:01:39.000 --> 00:01:44.000 + +Enjoy Glenda Jackson with a Constant Snug Fit and Solid Support in all four areas. + +00:01:44.000 --> 00:02:05.000 + +Other productions include 'Treasure Island'... 'Swan Lake'... 'The Life and Loves of Toulouse Lautrec'... and 'The Great Escape', with a cast of thousands losing over 1500 inches. + +00:02:05.000 --> 00:02:20.000 +[ACTION] Prison-camp scrubland; escape through tunnel; guards and tracker dogs in trim-jeans pursue. Counter: INCHES LOST SO FAR skyrockets. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_28/9_Fish-slapping_dance.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_28/9_Fish-slapping_dance.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..c0e80fce --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_28/9_Fish-slapping_dance.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,13 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit 9: The Fish Slapping Dance + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 +[CAPTION] And now, the Fish Slapping Dance. + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:16.000 +[ACTION] Quayside. John stands still; Michael capers with two tiny fish, slapping John's cheeks lightly to jolly Edward German music. + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:20.000 +[ACTION] Music ends; John produces a huge fish and wallops Michael; Michael falls into the water. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_29_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/0_Episode29_head_tail.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_29_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/0_Episode29_head_tail.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..a3f62926 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_29_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/0_Episode29_head_tail.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,34 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Intro titles, theme, animated titles, continuity, and end announcements. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:05.000 +[caption] Opening title sequence and signature tune for 'The Money Programme' + +00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:08.000 +[action] Presenter set with two guests. Close-up on presenter. + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:10.000 +[caption] Animated titles. + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:13.000 + +Monty Python's Flying Circuses. + +00:28:30.000 --> 00:28:35.000 +[caption] Fade to black and then to BBC world symbol. + +00:28:35.000 --> 00:28:40.000 + +And now on BBC another six minutes of Monty Python's Flying Circus. + +00:39:30.000 --> 00:39:35.000 +[caption] Cut to BBC world symbol. + +00:39:35.000 --> 00:39:40.000 + +And now on BBC 1, one more minute of Monty Python's Flying Circus. + +00:39:40.000 --> 00:39:45.000 +[caption] THE END + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_29_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/10_Six_more_minutes_of_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_29_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/10_Six_more_minutes_of_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..9457c9fa --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_29_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/10_Six_more_minutes_of_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,11 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Skit begins at anchor #10. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 +[caption] Fade to black and then to BBC world symbol. + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:08.000 + +And now on BBC another six minutes of Monty Python's Flying Circus. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_29_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/11_Argument_clinic.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_29_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/11_Argument_clinic.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..c44a2ae9 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_29_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/11_Argument_clinic.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,113 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Skit begins at anchor #11. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 +[action] Reception desk in an office building. + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:05.500 + +Yes, sir? + +00:00:05.500 --> 00:00:08.000 + +I'd like to have an argument please. + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:12.000 + +Certainly, sir. Have you been here before...? + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:14.000 + +No, this is my first time. + +00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:18.000 + +I see. Do you want to have the full argument, or were you thinking of taking a course? + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:20.000 + +Well, what would be the cost? + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:25.000 + +Yes, it's one pound for a five-minute argument, but only eight pounds for a course of ten. + +00:00:25.000 --> 00:00:30.000 + +Well, I think it's probably best if I start with the one and see how it goes from there. OK? + +00:00:30.000 --> 00:00:36.000 + +Fine. I'll see who's free at the moment ... Mr. Du-Bakey's free, but he's a little bit conciliatory ... yes, try Mr. Barnard - Room 12. + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:38.000 + +Thank you. + +00:00:38.000 --> 00:00:41.000 +[action] Man walks down corridor, opens door 12. + +00:00:41.000 --> 00:00:42.500 + +[shouting] What do you want? + +00:00:42.500 --> 00:00:44.500 + +Well I was told outside ... + +00:00:44.500 --> 00:00:48.000 + +Don't give me that you snotty-faced heap of parrot droppings! + +00:00:48.000 --> 00:00:49.500 + +What! + +00:00:49.500 --> 00:00:55.000 + +Shut your festering gob you tit! Your type makes me puke! You vacuous toffee-nosed malodorous pervert! + +00:00:55.000 --> 00:00:57.500 + +Look! I came here for an argument. + +00:00:57.500 --> 00:00:59.500 + +[calmly] Oh! I'm sorry, this is abuse. + +00:00:59.500 --> 00:01:01.500 + +Oh I see, that explains it. + +00:01:01.500 --> 00:01:03.500 + +No, you want room 12A next door. + +00:01:03.500 --> 00:01:05.500 +I see - sorry. [action] exits + +00:01:05.500 --> 00:01:07.000 +Not at all. [action] as he goes Stupid git. + +00:01:07.000 --> 00:01:10.000 +[action] Outside 12A. Knock. + +00:01:10.000 --> 00:01:11.500 + +Come in. + +00:01:11.500 --> 00:01:14.000 +[action] Enters; Mr Vibrating at desk. Is this the right room for an argument? + +00:01:14.000 --> 00:01:15.500 + +I've told you once. + +00:01:15.500 --> 00:01:16.800 + +No you haven't. + +00:01:16.800 --> 00:02:40.000 +[dialogue] The contradiction routine ensues: 'Yes I have' / 'No you haven't' ... five-minute argument timing gag, payment dispute, and 'arguing in my spare time' punch. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_29_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/12_Hitting_on_the_head_lessons.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_29_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/12_Hitting_on_the_head_lessons.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..72abd964 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_29_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/12_Hitting_on_the_head_lessons.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,73 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Skit begins at anchor #12. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:03.000 +I want to complain. [action] 'Spreaders' hits man on head with mallet. + +00:00:03.000 --> 00:00:05.000 + +Ooh! + +00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:10.000 +No, no, no, hold your head like this, and then go 'waaagh'! Try it again. [action] hits him again + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:11.500 + +Waaghh! + +00:00:11.500 --> 00:00:16.000 + +Better. Better. But 'waaaaaghh'! 'Waaaagh'! Hold your hands here ... + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:17.500 + +No! + +00:00:17.500 --> 00:00:19.500 +Now. [action] hits him + +00:00:19.500 --> 00:00:21.000 + +Waagh! + +00:00:21.000 --> 00:00:22.500 + +That's it. That's it. Good. + +00:00:22.500 --> 00:00:24.000 + +Stop hitting me! + +00:00:24.000 --> 00:00:25.000 + +What? + +00:00:25.000 --> 00:00:26.500 + +Stop hitting me. + +00:00:26.500 --> 00:00:28.000 + +Stop hitting you? + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:29.000 + +Yes. + +00:00:29.000 --> 00:00:31.000 + +What did you come in here for then? + +00:00:31.000 --> 00:00:32.500 + +I came here to complain. + +00:00:32.500 --> 00:00:35.000 + +Oh I'm sorry, that's next door. It's being hit on the head lessons in here. + +00:00:35.000 --> 00:00:36.500 + +What a stupid concept. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_29_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/13_Inspector_Flying_Fox_of_the_Yard.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_29_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/13_Inspector_Flying_Fox_of_the_Yard.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..4f1d2be2 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_29_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/13_Inspector_Flying_Fox_of_the_Yard.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,128 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Skit begins at anchor #13. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:02.500 +[action] Detective Inspector Fox enters. + +00:00:02.500 --> 00:00:04.500 + +Right. Hold it there. + +00:00:04.500 --> 00:00:06.000 + +What? + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:12.000 + +Allow me to introduce myself. I'm Inspector Fox of the Light Entertainment Police, Comedy Division, Special Flying Squad. + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:14.000 + +Flying Fox of the Yard. + +00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:16.000 +Shut up! [action] he hits the man with a truncheon + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:17.000 + +Ooooh? + +00:00:17.000 --> 00:00:18.500 + +No, no, no - Waagh! + +00:00:18.500 --> 00:00:20.500 +And you. [action] he hits Spreaders + +00:00:20.500 --> 00:00:21.500 + +Waagh! + +00:00:21.500 --> 00:00:25.000 + +He's good! You could learn a thing or two from him. Right now you two me old beauties, you are nicked. + +00:00:25.000 --> 00:00:26.500 + +What for? + +00:00:26.500 --> 00:00:30.000 + +I'm charging you under Section 21 of the Strange Sketch Act. + +00:00:30.000 --> 00:00:31.500 + +The what? + +00:00:31.500 --> 00:00:40.000 + +You are hereby charged that you did wilfully take part in a strange sketch, that is, a skit, spoof or humorous vignette of an unconventional nature with intent to cause grievous mental confusion to the Great British Public. [to camera] Evening all. + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:41.500 + +It's a fair cop. + +00:00:41.500 --> 00:00:43.000 +And you tosh. [action] hits the man + +00:00:43.000 --> 00:00:44.500 + +WAAAGH! + +00:00:44.500 --> 00:00:46.000 + +That's excellent! Right, come on down the Yard. + +00:00:46.000 --> 00:00:48.000 +[action] Another inspector arrives. + +00:00:48.000 --> 00:00:53.000 + +Hold it. Hold it. Allow me to introduce myself. I'm Inspector Thompson's Gazelle of the Programme Planning Police, Light Entertainment Division, Special Flying Squad. + +00:00:53.000 --> 00:00:54.500 + +Flying Thompson's Gazelle of the Yard! + +00:00:54.500 --> 00:00:56.500 +Shut up! [action] he hits him + +00:00:56.500 --> 00:00:58.000 + +Waaaagh! + +00:00:58.000 --> 00:00:59.500 + +He's good. + +00:00:59.500 --> 00:01:01.500 +Shut up! [action] hits Spreaders + +00:01:01.500 --> 00:01:03.000 + +WAAGH! + +00:01:03.000 --> 00:01:05.000 +Rotten. [action] he gets hit WAAAGH! + +00:01:05.000 --> 00:01:16.000 + +Good. Now I'm arrestin' this entire show on three counts: one, acts of self-conscious behaviour contrary to the 'Not in front of the children' Act, two, always saying 'It's so and so of the Yard' every time the fuzz arrives and, three, and this is the cruncher, offenses against the 'Getting out of sketches without using a proper punchline' Act, four, namely, simply ending every bleedin' sketch by just having a policeman come in and... wait a minute. + +00:01:16.000 --> 00:01:18.000 +[action] Another policeman enters. + +00:01:18.000 --> 00:01:19.500 +Hold it. [action] puts his hand on Inspector Thompson's Gazelle's shoulder + +00:01:19.500 --> 00:01:20.500 + +It's a fair cop. + +00:01:20.500 --> 00:01:23.000 +[action] A large hairy hand appears through the door and claps him on the shoulder. + +00:01:23.000 --> 00:01:25.000 +[caption] THE END + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_29_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/14_One_more_minute_of_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_29_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/14_One_more_minute_of_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..1f8c83fd --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_29_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/14_One_more_minute_of_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,11 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Skit begins at anchor #14. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:03.500 +[action] Cut to BBC world symbol. + +00:00:03.500 --> 00:00:08.000 + +And now on BBC 1, one more minute of Monty Python's Flying Circus. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_29_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/1_The_Money_Programme.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_29_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/1_The_Money_Programme.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..707fe08d --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_29_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/1_The_Money_Programme.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,11 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Skit begins at anchor #1. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Opening title sequence and signature tune for 'The Money Programme'. Presenter with two guests. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:01:10.000 + +Good evening and welcome to 'The Money Programme'. Tonight on 'The Money Programme', we're going to look at money. Lots of it. On film, and in the studio. Some of it in nice piles, others in lovely clanky bits of loose change, some of it neatly counted into fat little hundreds, delicate fivers stuffed into bulging wallets, nice crisp clean cheques, pert pieces of copper coinage thrust deep into trouser pockets, romantic foreign money rolling against the thigh with rough familiarity, [stage direction: starting to get excited] beautiful wayward curlicued banknotes, filigree copperplating cheek by jowl with tumbling hexagonal milled edges, rubbing gently against the terse leather of beautifully balanced bank books [stage direction: collects himself] I'm sorry. But I love money. All money. I've always wanted money. [stage direction: getting worked up again] To handle. To touch. The smell of the rain-washed florin. The lure of the lira. [stage direction: standing on the desk] The glitter and the glory of the guinea. The romance of the rouble. The feel of the franc, the heel of the Deutschmark. The cold antiseptic sting of the Swiss franc, and the sunburnt splendor of the Australian dollar. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_29_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/2_There_is_nothing_quite_so_wonderful_as_money_(song).vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_29_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/2_There_is_nothing_quite_so_wonderful_as_money_(song).vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..81364c1d --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_29_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/2_There_is_nothing_quite_so_wonderful_as_money_(song).vtt @@ -0,0 +1,38 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Skit begins at anchor #2. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 +[action] Presenter sings to piano accompaniment. + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:16.000 +[caption] I've got ninety thousand pounds in my pajamas. I've got forty thousand French francs in my fridge. I've got lots and lots of lira, Now the deutschmark's getting dearer, And my dollar bill could buy the Brooklyn Bridge. + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:20.000 +[action] Five male singers in Welsh women's national costume enter. A Welsh harpist joins. + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:30.000 +[caption] There is nothing quite as wonderful as money, There is nothing quite as beautiful as cash, Some people say it's folly But I'd rather have the lolly With money you can make a smash. + +00:00:30.000 --> 00:00:36.000 +[caption] There is nothing quite as wonderful as money There is nothing like a newly minted pound + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:44.000 +[caption] Everyone must hanker For the butchness of a banker It's accountancy that makes the world go round. + +00:00:44.000 --> 00:00:49.000 +[caption] You can keep your Marxist ways For it's only just a phase. + +00:00:49.000 --> 00:00:58.000 +[caption] For its money, money, money, Makes the world go round. [action] A shower of paper notes descends. [caption] Money, money, money, money, money, money! + +00:00:58.000 --> 00:01:02.000 +[action] The 'It's' man appears. + +00:01:02.000 --> 00:01:04.000 + +It's... + +00:01:04.000 --> 00:01:08.000 +[caption] Animated titles. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_29_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/3_Erizabeth_L.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_29_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/3_Erizabeth_L.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..b64a5625 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_29_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/3_Erizabeth_L.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,165 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Skit begins at anchor #3. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Exterior of an Elizabethan palace. Elizabethan music. Messenger on a moped drives through the front door. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:10.000 +[caption] ERIZABETH L + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:18.000 +[action] Messenger mopeds along corridor; hands moped to guard; trumpeters play fanfare as he approaches a clerk. + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:22.000 +[caption] EPISODE THREE | THE ALMALDA + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:25.000 + +I bling a dispatch flom Prymouth. + +00:00:25.000 --> 00:00:27.000 + +Flom Prymouth? + +00:00:27.000 --> 00:00:30.000 + +Flow Sil Flancis Dlake. + +00:00:30.000 --> 00:00:33.000 + +Entel and apploach the thlone. + +00:00:33.000 --> 00:00:38.000 +[action] Doors open. Messenger rides another moped up to the throne. Courtiers sit on motorized bicycles. + +00:00:38.000 --> 00:00:41.000 + +What news flom Prymouth? + +00:00:41.000 --> 00:00:45.000 + +Dlake has sighted the Spanish Freet, youl Majesty. + +00:00:45.000 --> 00:00:49.000 + +So! Phirip's garreons ale hele. How many? + +00:00:49.000 --> 00:00:53.000 + +One hundled and thilty-six men of wal. + +00:00:53.000 --> 00:00:55.000 + +Broody herr. + +00:00:55.000 --> 00:00:57.000 + +Is Dlake plepaled? + +00:00:57.000 --> 00:01:01.000 + +He has oldeled the whore freet into the Blitish Channer. + +00:01:01.000 --> 00:01:07.000 + +So, we must to Tirbuly. Reicestel! Sil Wartel Lareigh! Groucester! We sharr lide to... + +00:01:07.000 --> 00:01:12.000 +[action] Enter Japanese director. + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:18.000 + +Groucestel! Groucestel! Not Groucester. Come on, ret's get this light. Reicestel! + +00:01:18.000 --> 00:01:19.500 + +Yes. + +00:01:19.500 --> 00:01:22.500 + +That was telliber. + +00:01:22.500 --> 00:01:24.500 + +What? + +00:01:24.500 --> 00:01:27.500 + +Telliber. + +00:01:27.500 --> 00:01:30.000 + +Oh! Solly. + +00:01:30.000 --> 00:01:35.000 + +When you have a rine, ling your berr. + +00:01:35.000 --> 00:01:38.000 + +Ling my berr? + +00:01:38.000 --> 00:01:44.000 +[action] (linging his berr for him) Ling ling. Rike this. And cut the broody herr. Erizabeth! + +00:01:44.000 --> 00:01:46.500 + +[cheesed off] Yes? + +00:01:46.500 --> 00:01:49.500 + +You should be on a bicycer. + +00:01:49.500 --> 00:01:51.500 + +Why?! + +00:01:51.500 --> 00:01:55.500 + +You rook odd rike that. + +00:01:55.500 --> 00:02:04.000 + +I do not look odd like this - it's that lot that looks odd. It's bleeding weird having half the Tudor nobility ligging around on motorized bicycles. + +00:02:04.000 --> 00:02:06.500 + +It's vely sullearist. + +00:02:06.500 --> 00:02:08.000 + +Horsefeathers! + +00:02:08.000 --> 00:02:12.000 + +Listen mate. I'm beginning to have my doubts about you. + +00:02:12.000 --> 00:02:14.500 + +What do you mean? + +00:02:14.500 --> 00:02:20.000 + +I'm telling you straight, mate. I don't think you're Luchino Visconti at all. + +00:02:20.000 --> 00:02:26.000 + +Of course I am. Me vely impoltant Itarian firm dilectol. + +00:02:26.000 --> 00:02:28.500 + +You are a Nip. + +00:02:28.500 --> 00:02:35.000 + +Lubbish! Me genuine wop. [sings] Alliveldelchi Loma... + +00:02:35.000 --> 00:02:37.500 + +He's bluffing. + +00:02:37.500 --> 00:02:43.000 + +[sings] Vo-oorale... Ooh ... Is that the time, I must fry. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_29_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/4_Fraud_film_squad.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_29_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/4_Fraud_film_squad.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..5828460f --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_29_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/4_Fraud_film_squad.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,30 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Skit begins at anchor #4. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:03.500 +[action] The door opens. Inspector Leopard runs in, followed by a copper. + +00:00:03.500 --> 00:00:20.000 + +Not so fast, Yakomoto. [action] Trumpeters play a fanfare. [action] Shut up! [action] Fanfare stops. Allow me to introduce myself. I am Inspector Leopard of Scotland Yard, Special Fraud Film Director Squad. + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:22.500 + +Leopard of the Yard! + +00:00:22.500 --> 00:02:10.000 + +The same. Only more violent. [action] Knees the copper in the balls. Right, Slit Eyes Yakomoto, I'm arresting you for the impersonation of Signor Luchino Visconti, famous Italian director of such movie classics as 'Ossessione' 1942, 'La Tetra Trema' 1948, and 'Bellissima' 1951 - a satisfying ironic slice-of-life drama. 1957 brought to the silver screen his 'I Bianche Notre' adapted by Dostoyevsky, a mannered and romantic melancholy of snow and mist and moonlit encounters on canal bridges. 'Boccaccio 70' followed five years later and the following year saw 'The Leopard'! So impressed was I with this motion picture treatment of the Risorgimento that I went along to Somerset House and changed me own name to Leopard, preferring it to me original handle, 'Panther' (Aargh). I digress. 1969 saw 'The Damned', a Götterdämmerung epic of political and industrial shennanigans in good old Nazi Germany, starring Helmut Berger as a stinking transvestite what should have his face sawn off, the curvaceous Charlotte Rampling as a bit of tail, and the impeccable Dirk Bogarde as Von Essen. The association of the latter with Signor Visconti fructified with Dirk's magnificent portrayal of the elderly poof what expires in Venice. And so, Yakomoto... blimey, he gone! Never mind. I'll have you instead. [action] Grabs the queen. + +00:02:10.000 --> 00:02:12.000 + +What? + +00:02:12.000 --> 00:02:16.000 + +I haven't got time to go chasing after him, there's violence to be done. + +00:02:16.000 --> 00:02:20.000 +[caption] ANIMATION: sketch about violence. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_29_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/5_Salvation_fuzz.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_29_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/5_Salvation_fuzz.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..66fae754 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_29_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/5_Salvation_fuzz.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,239 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Skit begins at anchor #5. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 +[action] Kitchen. A man and woman listening to a radio. + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:08.000 + +I would like to ask the team what they would do if they were Hitler. + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:09.500 + +Gerald? + +00:00:09.500 --> 00:00:14.000 + +Well I'd annex the Sudeterland and sign a non-aggression pact with Russia. + +00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:15.500 + +Norman? + +00:00:15.500 --> 00:00:20.000 + +Well I'd do the Reichstag bathroom in purples and golds and ban abortion on demand. + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:27.000 +[action] Switching the radio off. Liberal rubbish. Klaus ...What do you want with your jugged fish? + +00:00:27.000 --> 00:00:28.500 + +Halibut. + +00:00:28.500 --> 00:00:31.000 + +The jugged fish is halibut. + +00:00:31.000 --> 00:00:35.000 + +Well, what fish have you got that isn't jugged? + +00:00:35.000 --> 00:00:36.500 + +Rabbit. + +00:00:36.500 --> 00:00:38.500 + +What? Rabbit fish? + +00:00:38.500 --> 00:00:40.500 + +Yes. It's got fins. + +00:00:40.500 --> 00:00:42.500 + +Is it dead? + +00:00:42.500 --> 00:00:45.500 + +Well, it was coughing up blood last night. + +00:00:45.500 --> 00:00:49.000 + +All right I'll have the dead unjugged rabbit fish. + +00:00:49.000 --> 00:00:52.000 +[caption] ONE DEAD UNJUGGED RABBIT FISH LATER + +00:00:52.000 --> 00:00:54.000 + +Well that was really horrible. + +00:00:54.000 --> 00:00:56.000 + +You're always complaining. + +00:00:56.000 --> 00:00:58.000 + +What's for afters? + +00:00:58.000 --> 00:01:04.000 + +Well there's rat cake ... rat sorbet ... rat pudding ... or strawberry tart. + +00:01:04.000 --> 00:01:05.500 + +Strawberry tart?! + +00:01:05.500 --> 00:01:08.000 + +Well, it's got some rat in it. + +00:01:08.000 --> 00:01:09.500 + +How much? + +00:01:09.500 --> 00:01:12.000 + +Three (rather a lot really). + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:15.000 + +... well, I'll have a slice without so much rat in it. + +00:01:15.000 --> 00:01:18.000 +[caption] ONE SLICE OF STRAWBERRY TART WITHOUT SO MUCH RAT IN IT LATER + +00:01:18.000 --> 00:01:19.500 + +Appalling. + +00:01:19.500 --> 00:01:21.500 + +Moan, moan, moan. + +00:01:21.500 --> 00:01:24.000 +[action] Enter their son. + +00:01:24.000 --> 00:01:26.000 + +Hello, mum, hello, dad. + +00:01:26.000 --> 00:01:27.500 + +Hello, son. + +00:01:27.500 --> 00:01:30.000 + +There's a dead bishop on the landing. + +00:01:30.000 --> 00:01:31.500 + +Where did that come from? + +00:01:31.500 --> 00:01:32.800 + +What do you mean? + +00:01:32.800 --> 00:01:34.800 + +What's its diocese? + +00:01:34.800 --> 00:01:38.000 + +Well it looked a bit Bath and Wellsish to me. + +00:01:38.000 --> 00:01:40.500 +I'll go and have a look. [action] goes out + +00:01:40.500 --> 00:01:43.000 + +I don't know who keeps bringing them in here. + +00:01:43.000 --> 00:01:44.500 + +Well it's not me. + +00:01:44.500 --> 00:01:48.000 + +I've put three out by the bin and the dustmen won't touch 'em. + +00:01:48.000 --> 00:01:50.000 +[action] coming back. Leicester. + +00:01:50.000 --> 00:01:51.500 + +How do you know? + +00:01:51.500 --> 00:01:55.000 + +Tattooed on the back of his neck. I'm going to call the police. + +00:01:55.000 --> 00:01:57.000 + +Shouldn't you call the Church? + +00:01:57.000 --> 00:01:58.500 + +Call the Church police. + +00:01:58.500 --> 00:02:02.000 +...all right. [action] shouts The Church police! + +00:02:02.000 --> 00:02:05.000 +[action] Enter two policemen with ecclesiastical accoutrements. + +00:02:05.000 --> 00:02:06.500 + +Yus? + +00:02:06.500 --> 00:02:09.000 + +There's another dead bishop on the landing. + +00:02:09.000 --> 00:02:11.000 + +Suffragan or diocesan? + +00:02:11.000 --> 00:02:12.500 + +How should I know? + +00:02:12.500 --> 00:02:16.000 + +It's tatooed on the back of their neck. Ere! Is that rat tart? + +00:02:16.000 --> 00:02:17.500 + +Yes. + +00:02:17.500 --> 00:02:23.000 +Disgusting! Right! The hunt is on. [action] kneels Oh Lord we beseech thee tell us who croaked Leicester. + +00:02:23.000 --> 00:02:27.000 +[action] Organ music. A huge hand descends and points at the man. + +00:02:27.000 --> 00:02:30.000 + +All right, it's a fair cop, but society is to blame. + +00:02:30.000 --> 00:02:31.500 + +Agreed. + +00:02:31.500 --> 00:02:34.000 + +I would like the three by the bin to be taken into consideration. + +00:02:34.000 --> 00:02:37.000 + +Right. And now, I'd like to conclude this arrest with a hymn. + +00:02:37.000 --> 00:02:45.000 +[caption] (singing) And did those feet in ancient times walk upon England's mountains green. [action] policemen escort the man out. [caption] And was the holy lamb of God on England's pleasant pastures seen. + +00:02:45.000 --> 00:02:48.000 +[caption] ANIMATION: bouncing Queen Victoria. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_29_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/6_Jungle_restaurant.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_29_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/6_Jungle_restaurant.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..6799bcbd --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_29_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/6_Jungle_restaurant.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,105 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Skit begins at anchor #6. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:08.000 + +Meanwhile in the jungle next door. + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:20.000 +[action] Steamy tropical jungle. Native guide leads four explorers through thick undergrowth. Clearing reveals a chic London-style bistro in the jungle; other explorers dine. + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:23.000 + +What a simply super little place! + +00:00:23.000 --> 00:00:33.000 + +Yes, they've done wonders with it. You know this used to be one of the most swampy disease infested areas of the whole jungle, and they've turned it into this smashing little restaurant. [action] Head waiter in oversized tails beckons. Here you are Omkami, thank you. Hello, Mr Akwekwe. + +00:00:33.000 --> 00:00:36.000 + +Hello, Mr Spare-Buttons-Supplied-With-The-Shirt. Nice to see you again. + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:42.000 + +These are some of my fellow explorers: Sir Charles Farquarson, Brian Bailey, Betty Bailey and this is Mr Akwekwe, who started the whole place. + +00:00:42.000 --> 00:00:44.000 + +It really is super. + +00:00:44.000 --> 00:00:46.000 + +[who is dressed as a man and has a moustache] Terrific idea. + +00:00:46.000 --> 00:00:49.000 + +May I recommend the alligator purees. + +00:00:49.000 --> 00:00:58.000 +[action] A gorilla tears a man from a table and drags him into jungle. Awful shrieks. Akwekwe rushes after; a shot; silence. He drags the customer back, slumps in chair, returns bloodied to take orders. + +00:00:58.000 --> 00:01:00.500 + +Now then, have you decided? + +00:01:00.500 --> 00:01:06.000 +[action] Produces waiter notepad. + +00:01:06.000 --> 00:01:10.000 + +Ye-es ... Well there's two avocado vinaigrette here and what are you going to have Brian? + +00:01:10.000 --> 00:01:12.000 + +Er quiche lorraine for me, please. + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:14.500 + +Right, so that's two avocado, one quiche ... + +00:01:14.500 --> 00:01:23.000 +[action] Pygmy fires blowpipe. Another diner slumps with dart in chest. Akwekwe checks, tut-tuts, resumes order taking. + +00:01:23.000 --> 00:01:25.500 + +So, that's two avocado, one quiche ... + +00:01:25.500 --> 00:01:27.500 + +And a soup of the day. + +00:01:27.500 --> 00:01:32.000 +Right. [action] sinister jungle drums in distance; fear in Akwekwe's eyes. And to follow? + +00:01:32.000 --> 00:01:36.000 + +Two chicken à la reine, with sauce provençale. + +00:01:36.000 --> 00:01:38.000 + +And one scampi désirée. + +00:01:38.000 --> 00:01:41.000 + +And boeuf bourguignon with a green salad. + +00:01:41.000 --> 00:01:45.000 +[action] Akwekwe shouts to kitchen: Right on. Two chicken! One scampi! One boeuf with green salad! + +00:01:45.000 --> 00:01:48.000 + +There may be ... a little delay. + +00:01:48.000 --> 00:01:51.000 + +That's fine but we have to be out by three. + +00:01:51.000 --> 00:01:53.000 + +Yes, sir. Yes, we'll try. + +00:01:53.000 --> 00:02:00.000 +[action] Drum beats grow deafening; intercut forest rustling and Akwekwe's fearful close-ups; sudden cut to BBC world symbol. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_29_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/7_Apology_for_violence_and_nudity.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_29_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/7_Apology_for_violence_and_nudity.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..323dd693 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_29_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/7_Apology_for_violence_and_nudity.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,11 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Skit begins at anchor #7. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:25.000 + +The BBC would like to announce that the next scene is not considered suitable for family viewing. It contains scenes of violence, involving people's heads and arms getting chopped off, their ears nailed to trees, and their toenails pulled out in slow motion. There are also scenes of naked women with floppy breasts, and also at one point you can see a pair of buttocks and there's another bit where I'll swear you can see everything, but my friend says it's just the way he's holding the spear. [pulling himself together] Because of the unsuitability of the scene, the BBC will be replacing it with a scene from a repeat of 'Gardening Club' for 1958. + +00:00:25.000 --> 00:00:35.000 +[action] A beautiful well-stocked garden bed. 'Gardening Club' music. Speeded-up orgy with nude woman, city gent, two nuns, two Vikings, a gumby, a pantomime goose, etc. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_29_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/8_Ken_Russell's_'Gardening_Club'.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_29_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/8_Ken_Russell's_'Gardening_Club'.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..1657d745 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_29_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/8_Ken_Russell's_'Gardening_Club'.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,104 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Skit begins at anchor #8. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 +[caption] KEN RUSSELL'S GARDENING CLUB (1958) + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:06.000 + +And now back to the story. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:14.000 +[action] Two pygmy warriors pull four roped explorers from jungle. Tracking with them. + +00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:16.500 + +That was a nasty business back at the restaurant. + +00:00:16.500 --> 00:00:19.500 + +Yes, I thought most places took Barclaycard nowadays. + +00:00:19.500 --> 00:00:22.500 + +Where do you think they're taking us, Brian? + +00:00:22.500 --> 00:00:24.500 + +God knows! + +00:00:24.500 --> 00:00:27.000 + +[pointing, eyes wide with amazement] Look! + +00:00:27.000 --> 00:00:30.000 +[action] Stock shot of a volcano. Thrilling chord. Cut back. + +00:00:30.000 --> 00:00:34.000 + +[filled with awe] The sacred volcano Andu! Which no man has seen before. + +00:00:34.000 --> 00:00:36.000 + +No, no, no, next to that. + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:39.000 +[action] Stock shot of London Brick Company chimneys. Thrilling chord. Back to explorers. + +00:00:39.000 --> 00:00:41.000 + +The London Brick Company? + +00:00:41.000 --> 00:00:43.000 + +No, no, no, no - next to that. + +00:00:43.000 --> 00:00:46.000 +[action] Stock shot: plateau of Roiurama. Thrilling chord. Back to explorers. + +00:00:46.000 --> 00:00:53.000 + +The forbidden plateau of Roiurama, the Lost World, thrown up by mighty earth movements thousands of millions of years ago, where strange primeval creatures defying evolution, lurk in the dark, impenetrable forests, cut off forever from the outside world. + +00:00:53.000 --> 00:00:55.000 + +I still can't see it. + +00:00:55.000 --> 00:00:57.000 + +You don't think that's where they're taking us? + +00:00:57.000 --> 00:00:59.500 + +Yes, and God knows what we'll find there. + +00:00:59.500 --> 00:01:03.500 +[action] A pygmy native rushes up with a script. + +00:01:03.500 --> 00:01:05.500 + +What page please? + +00:01:05.500 --> 00:01:07.000 + +What? + +00:01:07.000 --> 00:01:10.000 + +[with a trace of irritation] What page in the script? + +00:01:10.000 --> 00:01:12.000 + +[whispered] Page 7. + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:20.000 +[rehearsing] 'Come on, you dogs, we have far to go. We must lose no time'. [tries with eyes shut] 'Come on, you dogs, we have far to go. We must lose no time'. 'Come on you dogs'. [action] Throws script; pushes them roughly. Come on you dogs, we have time to lose, this has gone too far. + +00:01:20.000 --> 00:01:24.000 +[action] Stock film of Houses of Parliament from across the Thames. + +00:01:24.000 --> 00:01:28.000 + +Meanwhile back in London ... at the British Explorers' Club in the Mall... + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_29_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/9_The_Lost_World_of_Roiurama.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_29_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/9_The_Lost_World_of_Roiurama.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..84831f16 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_29_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/9_The_Lost_World_of_Roiurama.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,159 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Skit begins at anchor #9. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:10.000 +[action] British Explorers' Club hallway. Polar explorers in furs read newspapers. 'Our Hero' with sign around neck approaches porter. A polar expedition team with huskies passes. + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:13.000 + +Any news of Betty Bailey's expedition, Hargreaves? + +00:00:13.000 --> 00:00:15.000 + +Er ... um ... er... + +00:00:15.000 --> 00:00:17.000 + +[through clenched teeth] Page 9... + +00:00:17.000 --> 00:00:19.500 +[action] Thumbing script under counter. 'The Lost World of Roiurama'. + +00:00:19.500 --> 00:00:21.000 + +That's my line. + +00:00:21.000 --> 00:00:24.000 + +Oh, sorry. 'Where were they going, sir'? + +00:00:24.000 --> 00:00:26.000 + +The Lost World of Roiurama. + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:28.000 + +Yes sir, we've got a telegram. + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:29.000 + +Oh + +00:00:29.000 --> 00:00:32.000 + +[reads it] Reads it. Expedition superb. Weather excellent. Everything wonderful. + +00:00:32.000 --> 00:00:34.000 + +I wonder what's gone wrong. + +00:00:34.000 --> 00:00:35.500 + +For God's sake be careful... + +00:00:35.500 --> 00:00:39.000 + +[irritably] Wait a minute... I'm going to go... after them. + +00:00:39.000 --> 00:00:41.000 + +For God's sake be careful, sir. + +00:00:41.000 --> 00:00:47.000 +[action] Cut to the lost world. The four explorers limp along exhaustedly. + +00:00:47.000 --> 00:00:49.500 + +My God, Betty, we're done for... + +00:00:49.500 --> 00:00:53.000 + +We'll never get out of here... we're completely lost, lost. Even the natives have gone. + +00:00:53.000 --> 00:00:57.000 + +Goodbye Betty, Goodbye Farquarson. Goodbye Brian. It's been a great expedition... + +00:00:57.000 --> 00:00:59.500 +[action] Music. Engraving of Crystal Palace. + +00:00:59.500 --> 00:01:01.500 +[caption] CRYSTAL PALACE 1851 + +00:01:01.500 --> 00:01:03.500 +[action] Cut back to jungle. + +00:01:03.500 --> 00:01:05.000 + +Great expedition ... + +00:01:05.000 --> 00:01:09.000 + +All that'll be left of us will be a map, a compass and a few feet of film, recording our last moments... + +00:01:09.000 --> 00:01:10.500 + +Wait a moment! + +00:01:10.500 --> 00:01:12.000 + +What is it? + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:15.000 + +If we're on film, there must be someone filming us. + +00:01:15.000 --> 00:01:17.000 + +My God, Betty, you're right! + +00:01:17.000 --> 00:01:22.000 +[action] They spot the camera, smile, greet the crew. + +00:01:22.000 --> 00:01:23.500 + +Look! Great to see you! + +00:01:23.500 --> 00:01:25.000 + +What a stroke of luck! + +00:01:25.000 --> 00:01:27.000 + +Hello! ... + +00:01:27.000 --> 00:01:28.500 + +Wait a minute! + +00:01:28.500 --> 00:01:30.500 + +What is it again? + +00:01:30.500 --> 00:01:36.000 + +If this is the crew who were filming us . .. who's filming us now? Look! + +00:01:36.000 --> 00:01:42.000 +[action] Wider shot reveals first camera crew and another camera crew; director appears dressed like Yakomoto but in blackface. + +00:01:42.000 --> 00:01:52.000 + +[African accent] Cut there man! No! No good! How we going to get feeling of personal alienation of self from society with this load of Bulldog Drummond crap? When I was doing 'La Notte' wi' dat Monica Vitti gal she don't gimme none of this empire building shit, man ... + +00:01:52.000 --> 00:01:56.000 +[action] Camera pans to reveal a door in jungle. Inspector enters. + +00:01:56.000 --> 00:02:30.000 + +Not so fast, Akarumba! Allow me to introduce myself. I'm Inspector Baboon of Scotland Yard's Special Fraud Film Director Squad, Jungle Division. + +00:02:30.000 --> 00:02:32.000 + +Baboon of the Yard! + +00:02:32.000 --> 00:04:10.000 + +Shut up! [action] shoots her Right, Akarumba! I'm arresting you for impersonating Signor Michelangelo Antonioni, an Italian film director who co-scripts all his own films, largely jettisoning narrative in favour of vague incident and relentless character study . . . [caption] During the harangue the credits start to roll, music very faint beneath his words. ... In his first film: 'Cronaca Di Un Areore' (1950), the couple are brought together by a shared irrational guilt. 'L'Amico' followed in 1955, and 1959 saw the first of Antonioni's world-famous trilogy, 'L'Avventura' - an acute study of boredom, restlessness and the futilities and agonies of purposeless living. In 'L'Eclisse', three years later, this analysis of sentiments is taken up once again. 'We do not have to know each other to love', says the heroine, 'and perhaps we do not have to love...' The 'Eclipse' of the emotions finally casts its shadow when darkness descends on a street corner. [caption] the credits end; voice and picture start to fade ... Signor Antonioni first makes use of colour to underline... + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_30_-_'Blood,_Devastation,_Death,_War_and_Horror'/0_Episode30_head_tail.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_30_-_'Blood,_Devastation,_Death,_War_and_Horror'/0_Episode30_head_tail.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..f6a049ee --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_30_-_'Blood,_Devastation,_Death,_War_and_Horror'/0_Episode30_head_tail.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,47 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Intro titles and end credits for Episode Thirty. Auto-generated placeholder timings. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Stock colour film montage: dogfight, trains crashing, Spanish hotel explosion, car crash, collapsing bridge, volcano, Torrey Canyon burning, forest fire. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:08.500 +[caption] BLOOD, DEATH, WAR, HORROR + +00:00:08.500 --> 00:00:14.000 +[action] Cut to interviewer set with sign: 'Blood, Devastation, Death, War and Horror'. + +00:01:20.000 --> 00:01:23.000 +[action] Naked organist cutaway; then announcer prepares. + +00:01:23.000 --> 00:01:25.000 + +And now… + +00:01:25.000 --> 00:01:26.500 + +It's… + +00:01:26.500 --> 00:01:32.000 +[action] Animated titles sequence begins. + +00:01:32.000 --> 00:01:36.000 + +Tony M. Nyphot's Flying Risccu. + +00:28:00.000 --> 00:28:06.000 +[caption] THE PANTOMIME HORSE IS A SECRET AGENT FILM. WRITTEN BY TALBOT ROTHWELL AND MIREILLE MATHIEU. BASED ON AN IDEA BY EDWARD VII. DIRECTED BY QUEEN JULIANA OF THE NETHERLANDS. PRODUCED BY SIR ALEC DOUGLAS-HOME AND KING HAAKON OF NORWAY. A CORPSE-HAKKON PRODUCTION. + +00:29:30.000 --> 00:29:40.000 +[caption] TONY M. NYPHOT'S FLYING RISCCU SAW CODVENICE, TWITNER DNA FORDEPERM YB HAMRAG PACHMAN JOHN ECLES RICE LIED TORN JERSEY (5.5) MICHAEL LAPIN MARTY RIGELLI SOLA GAERAPPIN CAROL CLEVELAND ARCHSEER YB SUZAN DAVIES KAME PU MADELAINE GAFFNEY MUTESOCS HAZEL PETHIG MAINATIONS YB TERRY GILLIAM CUFFS LAVISEET BERNARD WILKIE PISHCARG BOB BLAGDEN MALE FANCIMARM ALAN FEATHERSTONE MOLE TRIFID RAY MILLICHOPE DOSUN RICHARD CHUBB LIGHTGIN JIMMY PURDIE REDENSIG IAN WATSON DECODURP YB IAN MACNAUGHTON B. B. LURCOO + +00:29:40.000 --> 00:29:46.000 + +[dialogue] (German accent) Here you see some English comic actors engaged in a life or death struggle with a rather weak ending. This is typical of the zany madcap world of the irresistible kooky funsters. The English pantomime horse wins and so is assured of a place in British history and a steady job in a merchant bank. Unfortunately, before his pension rights are assured, he catches bronchitis and dies, another victim of the need to finish these shows on time. + +00:29:46.000 --> 00:29:50.000 +[action] Pantomime horse in bed, legs sticking in the air. + +00:29:50.000 --> 00:29:52.000 +[caption] ETH NED + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_30_-_'Blood,_Devastation,_Death,_War_and_Horror'/10_Army_captain_as_clown.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_30_-_'Blood,_Devastation,_Death,_War_and_Horror'/10_Army_captain_as_clown.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..57d49ca7 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_30_-_'Blood,_Devastation,_Death,_War_and_Horror'/10_Army_captain_as_clown.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,25 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit starts at anchor #10. Auto-generated placeholder timings. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 +[action] Circus ring backdrop; RSM in clown getup; Mr Man soaked, steaming. + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:16.000 + +Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! Thank you and now for the fish - the fish down the trousers. [action] Puts fish down Mr Man's trousers. It's your laugh mate it's not mine. It's your trousers - not my trousers - it's your trousers - and now for the whitewash. + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:22.000 + +[action] Pours whitewash over Mr Man. The whitewash over you - not over me. It's over you. You get the laugh. You get all the laughs. And now for the custard pie in the mush. + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:26.000 +[action] Custard pie in face; knees him in the groin. + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:30.000 + +It's not my mush - it's your mush. It's your laugh - it's your laugh mate - not mine. It's your bleeding laugh. + +00:00:30.000 --> 00:00:34.000 +[action] Cut: Mr Heath laughing; Women's Institute applauding. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_30_-_'Blood,_Devastation,_Death,_War_and_Horror'/11_Gestures_to_indicate_pauses_in_a_televised_talk.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_30_-_'Blood,_Devastation,_Death,_War_and_Horror'/11_Gestures_to_indicate_pauses_in_a_televised_talk.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..76d7164f --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_30_-_'Blood,_Devastation,_Death,_War_and_Horror'/11_Gestures_to_indicate_pauses_in_a_televised_talk.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,40 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit starts at anchor #11. Auto-generated placeholder timings. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:05.000 +[action] TV presentation set; huge lettering 'Is the Queen sane?'; Mr Orbiter-5 in swivel chair faces camera. + +00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:22.000 + +Good evening. Well tonight, we are going to talk about… well that is… I am going to talk about… well actually I am talking about it now… well I'm not talking about it now, but I am talking… I know I'm pausing occasionally, and not talking during the pauses, but the pauses are part of the whole process of talking… when one talks one has to pause… er … like then! I paused … but I was still talking … and again there! No the real point of what I'm saying is that when I appear not to be talking don't go nipping out to the kitchen, putting the kettle on … buttering scones… or getting crumbs and bits of food out of those round brown straw mats that the teapot goes on… because in all probability I'm still talking and what you heard was a pause … er … like there again. Look! To make it absolutely easier, so there's no problem at all, what I'll do, I'll give you some kind of sign, like this [action] Makes a gesture. + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:25.000 + +… while I'm still talking, and only pausing in between words… and when I've finished altogether I'll do this. [action] Sits upright and crosses arms. + +00:00:25.000 --> 00:00:27.000 +[caption] THE END + +00:00:27.000 --> 00:00:31.000 + +No, no! No sorry - just demonstrating… haven't finished. Haven't started yet. [action] Caption removed; gathers thoughts; remembers. + +00:00:31.000 --> 00:00:35.000 + +Oh dear. [action] Does the gesture hastily. Nearly forgot the gesture. Hope none of you are nipping out into the kitchen, getting bits of food out of those round brown mats which the teapot… Good evening [action] Gesture. Tonight I want to talk about… + +00:00:35.000 --> 00:00:38.000 +[action] Cut to BBC world symbol. + +00:00:38.000 --> 00:00:41.000 + +[voice over] We interrupt this programme to annoy you and make things generally irritating for you. + +00:00:41.000 --> 00:00:44.500 +[action] Back to Mr Orbiter-5. + +00:00:44.500 --> 00:00:50.000 + +… with a large piece of wet paper. [action] Gesture. Turn the paper over - turn the paper over keeping your eye on the camel, and paste down the edge of the sailor's uniform, until the word 'Maudling' is almost totally obscured. [action] Gesture. Well, that's one way of doing it. [action] Gesture. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_30_-_'Blood,_Devastation,_Death,_War_and_Horror'/12_Neurotic_announcers.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_30_-_'Blood,_Devastation,_Death,_War_and_Horror'/12_Neurotic_announcers.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..976309bf --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_30_-_'Blood,_Devastation,_Death,_War_and_Horror'/12_Neurotic_announcers.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,101 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit starts at anchor #12. Auto-generated placeholder timings. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 +[action] BBC world symbol holds throughout dialogue. + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:08.000 + +[voice over] Good evening, we interrupt this programme again, a) to irritate you and, b) to provide work for one of our announcers. + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:16.000 + +[voice over] Good evening, I'm the announcer who's just been given this job by the BBC and I'd just like to say how grateful I am to the BBC for providing me with work, particularly at this time of year, when things are a bit thin for us announcers… um… I don't know whether I should tell you this, but, well, I have been going through a rather tough time recently. Things have been pretty awful at home. My wife, Josephine… 'Joe-jums' as I call her … who is also an announcer… + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:17.500 + +Hello. + +00:00:17.500 --> 00:00:22.000 + +[voice over, tearful] … has not been able to announce since our youngest, Clifford, was born, and, well, I've just got no confidence left… I can't get up in the morning… I feel there's nothing worth living for… [stage direction] He sobs. + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:26.000 + +Hello, I'm another announcer, my name's Dick. Joe-jums just rang me and said Jack was having a bad time with this announcement, so I've just come to give him a hand. How is he, Joe-jums? + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:27.500 + +Pretty bad, Dick. + +00:00:27.500 --> 00:00:30.500 + +Jack… it's Dick… Do you want me to make the announcement? + +00:00:30.500 --> 00:00:35.000 + +No, no Dick. I must do it myself… it's my last chance with the BBC, I can't throw it away… I've got to do it … for Joe-jums… for the kids… I've got to go through with it… + +00:00:35.000 --> 00:00:38.000 + +Good man. Now remember your announcer's training: deep breaths, and try not to think about what you're saying… + +00:00:38.000 --> 00:00:41.000 + +Good evening. This [stage direction] A trace of superhuman effort in his voice. is BBC 1… + +00:00:41.000 --> 00:00:42.500 + +Good luck, Jack. + +00:00:42.500 --> 00:00:44.000 + +Keep going, old boy. + +00:00:44.000 --> 00:00:49.000 + +It's… nine o'clock… and… time… for… the News… read by… Richard Baker. + +00:00:49.000 --> 00:00:52.000 +[action] Cut to start of the 'Nine O'Clock News'. + +00:00:52.000 --> 00:00:53.500 + +You've done it. + +00:00:53.500 --> 00:00:55.500 + +Congratulations, old man! + +00:00:55.500 --> 00:01:05.000 +[action] Richard Baker at desk; we hear only announcers' celebration: corks popping, chatter, while Baker makes gestures between sentences. On-screen collage rolls: Nixon; Armstrong-Jones; White House; Princess Margaret; parliament; naked breasts; scrubbing brush; man with stoat through his head; Margaret Thatcher; lavatory; Scotsman posed; corkscrew; Edward Heath; false teeth in glass. + +00:01:05.000 --> 00:01:07.500 + +Fantastic darling, you were brilliant. No, no, it was the best you ever did. + +00:01:07.500 --> 00:01:08.500 + +Thank God. + +00:01:08.500 --> 00:01:10.000 + +It was absolutely super. + +00:01:10.000 --> 00:01:12.000 + +… have a drink. For God's sake drink this… + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:13.500 + +Fantastic. + +00:01:13.500 --> 00:01:16.000 + +The least I could do - super - I must come over. + +00:01:16.000 --> 00:01:18.000 + +I can't tell you how much that means. [etc.] + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_30_-_'Blood,_Devastation,_Death,_War_and_Horror'/13_The_news_with_Richard_Baker.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_30_-_'Blood,_Devastation,_Death,_War_and_Horror'/13_The_news_with_Richard_Baker.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..b63fc02a --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_30_-_'Blood,_Devastation,_Death,_War_and_Horror'/13_The_news_with_Richard_Baker.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,8 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit starts at anchor #13. Auto-generated placeholder timings. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 + +… until the name Maudling is almost totally obscured. That is the ned of the nicro-not wens. And now it's time for the late night film. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_30_-_'Blood,_Devastation,_Death,_War_and_Horror'/14_The_Pantomime_Horse_is_a_Secret_Agent.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_30_-_'Blood,_Devastation,_Death,_War_and_Horror'/14_The_Pantomime_Horse_is_a_Secret_Agent.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..180c18cb --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_30_-_'Blood,_Devastation,_Death,_War_and_Horror'/14_The_Pantomime_Horse_is_a_Secret_Agent.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,74 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit starts at anchor #14. Auto-generated placeholder timings. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:05.000 +[action] James Bond-style opening titles with pantomime horse imagery. + +00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:12.000 +[caption] THE PANTOMIME HORSE IS A SECRET AGENT FILM. WRITTEN BY TALBOT ROTHWELL AND MIREILLE MATHIEU. BASED ON AN IDEA BY EDWARD VII. DIRECTED BY QUEEN JULIANA OF THE NETHERLANDS. PRODUCED BY SIR ALEC DOUGLAS-HOME AND KING HAAKON OF NORWAY. A CORPSE-HAKKON PRODUCTION. + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:16.000 +[action] Idyllic river: boat drifts serenely; beautiful girl reclining; horse hoof round her shoulders. + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:18.500 + +Oh pantomime horse, that was wonderful. + +00:00:18.500 --> 00:00:20.500 + +Would you like another glass? + +00:00:20.500 --> 00:00:24.000 + +No, no, I mustn't. It makes me throw up… oh, I'm so bleeding happy. + +00:00:24.000 --> 00:00:25.500 + +Oh, Simone! + +00:00:25.500 --> 00:00:27.500 + +Oh, pantomime horse. + +00:00:27.500 --> 00:00:29.500 +[action] Cut to loony in eccentric costume. + +00:00:29.500 --> 00:00:30.500 + +Then… + +00:00:30.500 --> 00:00:38.000 +[action] Pantomime horse spins and fires toward trees; another horse falls into water; third horse scurries off. Dobbin and girl leap ashore. Car bursts from bushes; horse driving; Dobbin and girl leap into sports car to chase. + +00:00:38.000 --> 00:00:48.000 +[action] Exciting chase montage: cars, then tandems, horseback, rickshaws, on foot. + +00:00:48.000 --> 00:00:56.000 + +And now the English pantomime horse has very nearly caught up with the Russian pantomime horse, I think he's going to take him any moment now but what is this? What is this? + +00:00:56.000 --> 00:01:06.000 +[action] Round the corner: pantomime goose and pantomime Princess Margaret ambush English horse; fight starts; Russian horse escapes. + +00:01:06.000 --> 00:01:16.000 + +Yes it's pantomime Princess Margaret and the pantomime goose and they're attacking the English pantomime horse and the Russian pantomime horse has got away. But who is this? [action] Car draws up; Terence Rattigan, the Duke of Kent, and the RSM join fight; Russians joined by Heinz Sielmann, Peter Scott, Jacques Cousteau. + +00:01:16.000 --> 00:01:20.000 + +My goodness me it's the Duke of Kent to the rescue… + +00:01:20.000 --> 00:01:32.000 +[action] Fighting continues in background while credits roll up front (anagrammed cast list). + +00:01:32.000 --> 00:01:40.000 + +[dialogue] (German accent) Here you see some English comic actors engaged in a life or death struggle with a rather weak ending. This is typical of the zany madcap world of the irresistible kooky funsters. The English pantomime horse wins and so is assured of a place in British history and a steady job in a merchant bank. Unfortunately, before his pension rights are assured, he catches bronchitis and dies, another victim of the need to finish these shows on time. + +00:01:40.000 --> 00:01:43.000 +[action] Pantomime horse in bed with legs sticking in the air. + +00:01:43.000 --> 00:01:45.000 +[caption] ETH NED + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_30_-_'Blood,_Devastation,_Death,_War_and_Horror'/1_Blood_Devastation_Death_War_and_Horror.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_30_-_'Blood,_Devastation,_Death,_War_and_Horror'/1_Blood_Devastation_Death_War_and_Horror.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..4bd92816 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_30_-_'Blood,_Devastation,_Death,_War_and_Horror'/1_Blood_Devastation_Death_War_and_Horror.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,13 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit starts at anchor #1. Auto-generated placeholder timings. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Stock colour film montage of vivid explosive action. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:08.500 +[caption] BLOOD, DEATH, WAR, HORROR + +00:00:08.500 --> 00:00:12.500 +[action] Cut to interviewer set with sign: 'Blood, Devastation, Death, War and Horror'. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_30_-_'Blood,_Devastation,_Death,_War_and_Horror'/2_The_man_who_speaks_in_anagrams.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_30_-_'Blood,_Devastation,_Death,_War_and_Horror'/2_The_man_who_speaks_in_anagrams.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..6a31edba --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_30_-_'Blood,_Devastation,_Death,_War_and_Horror'/2_The_man_who_speaks_in_anagrams.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,118 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit starts at anchor #2. Auto-generated placeholder timings. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:05.000 + +Hello, good evening and welcome to another edition of Blood, Devastation, Death War and Horror, and later on we'll be meeting a man who does gardening. But first on the show we've got a man who speaks entirely in anagrams. + +00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:07.500 + +Taht si crreoct. + +00:00:07.500 --> 00:00:09.500 + +Do you enjoy it? + +00:00:09.500 --> 00:00:12.500 + +I stom certainly od. Revy chum so. + +00:00:12.500 --> 00:00:14.500 + +And what's your name? + +00:00:14.500 --> 00:00:17.000 + +Hamrag - Hamrag Yatlerot. + +00:00:17.000 --> 00:00:21.000 + +Well, Graham, nice to have you on the show. Now, where do you come from? + +00:00:21.000 --> 00:00:22.500 + +Bumcreland. + +00:00:22.500 --> 00:00:24.000 + +Cumberland? + +00:00:24.000 --> 00:00:26.000 + +Staht sit sepreicly. + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:29.000 + +And I believe you're working on an anagram version of Shakespeare? + +00:00:29.000 --> 00:00:33.000 + +Sey, sey - taht si crreoct, er. Ta the mnemot I'm wroking on 'The Mating of the Wersh'. + +00:00:33.000 --> 00:00:36.000 + +'The Mating of the Wersh'? By William Shakespeare? + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:38.500 + +Nay, by Malliwi Rapesheake. + +00:00:38.500 --> 00:00:40.500 + +And what else? + +00:00:40.500 --> 00:00:44.000 + +'Two Netlemeg of Verona', 'Twelfth Thing', 'The Chamrent of Venice'…. + +00:00:44.000 --> 00:00:46.000 + +Have you done 'Hamlet'? + +00:00:46.000 --> 00:00:49.000 + +'Thamle'. 'Be ot or bot ne ot, tath is the nestquie.' + +00:00:49.000 --> 00:00:51.000 + +And what is your next project? + +00:00:51.000 --> 00:00:53.000 + +'Ring Kichard the Thrid'. + +00:00:53.000 --> 00:00:54.500 + +I'm sorry? + +00:00:54.500 --> 00:00:58.000 + +'A shroe! A shroe! My dingkome for a shroe!' + +00:00:58.000 --> 00:01:02.000 + +Ah, Ring Kichard, yes… but surely that's not an anagram, that's a spoonerism. + +00:01:02.000 --> 00:01:06.000 + +If you're going to split hairs, I'm going to piss off. [action] He leaves. + +00:01:06.000 --> 00:01:10.000 +[action] Cut to the naked organist, then to the announcer. + +00:01:10.000 --> 00:01:11.500 + +And now… + +00:01:11.500 --> 00:01:13.000 + +It's… + +00:01:13.000 --> 00:01:17.000 +[action] Animated titles; VO anagram title. + +00:01:17.000 --> 00:01:20.000 + +Tony M. Nyphot's Flying Risccu. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_30_-_'Blood,_Devastation,_Death,_War_and_Horror'/3_Anagram_quiz.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_30_-_'Blood,_Devastation,_Death,_War_and_Horror'/3_Anagram_quiz.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..079f16d2 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_30_-_'Blood,_Devastation,_Death,_War_and_Horror'/3_Anagram_quiz.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,28 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit starts at anchor #3. Auto-generated placeholder timings. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:03.000 +[caption] CHAMRAN KNEBT + +00:00:03.000 --> 00:00:07.000 +[action] Pull out: board with green curtains; pepperpot in front. + +00:00:07.000 --> 00:00:10.000 + +Mrs Scab, you have twelve hours to beat the clock. + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:15.000 +[action] Gong; superimposed clock whirls through twelve hours; pepperpot rapidly rearranges letters to 'merchant bank'; gong; clock stops. + +00:00:15.000 --> 00:00:16.500 + +Correct! + +00:00:16.500 --> 00:00:19.500 + +I've done it. I've done it. Ha, ha, ha! + +00:00:19.500 --> 00:00:22.500 +[action] Enormous cartoon hammer head drops; pepperpot is flattened. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_30_-_'Blood,_Devastation,_Death,_War_and_Horror'/4_Merchant_banker.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_30_-_'Blood,_Devastation,_Death,_War_and_Horror'/4_Merchant_banker.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..af1a9995 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_30_-_'Blood,_Devastation,_Death,_War_and_Horror'/4_Merchant_banker.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,217 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit starts at anchor #4. Auto-generated placeholder timings. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] City gent at desk with sign 'Charman Knebter'; phone rings. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:22.000 + +Hello? Ah, Mr Victim, I'm glad to say that I've got the go-ahead to lend you the money you require. Yes, of course we will want as security the deeds of your house, of your aunt's house, of your second cousin's house, of your wife's parents' house, and of your grannie's bungalow, and we will in addition need a controlling interest in your new company, unrestricted access to your private bank account, the deposit in our vaults of your three children as hostages and a full legal indemnity against any acts of embezzlement carried out against you by any members of our staff during the normal course of their duties… no, I'm afraid we couldn't accept your dog instead of your youngest child, we would like to suggest a brand new scheme of ours under which 51% of both your dog and your wife pass to us in the event of your suffering a serious accident. Fine. No, not at all, nice to do business with you. [action] Puts phone down; on intercom. Miss Godfrey, could you send in Mr Ford please. [action] Mutters: Now where's that dictionary… inner life… [action] Knock; door opens. + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:24.000 + +That's right. + +00:00:24.000 --> 00:00:26.000 + +How do you do. I'm a merchant banker. + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:28.500 + +How do you do Mr… + +00:00:28.500 --> 00:00:31.000 + +Er… I forget my name for the moment but I am a merchant banker. + +00:00:31.000 --> 00:00:34.000 + +Oh. I wondered whether you'd like to contribute to the orphan's home. [action] Rattles tin. + +00:00:34.000 --> 00:00:38.000 + +Well I don't want to show my hand too early, but actually here at Slater Nazi we are quite keen to get into orphans, you know, developing market and all that… what sort of sum did you have in mind? + +00:00:38.000 --> 00:00:40.000 + +Well… er… you're a rich man. + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:46.000 + +Yes, I am. Yes. Yes, very very rich. Quite phenomenally wealthy. Yes, I do own the most startling quantifies of cash. Yes, quite right… you're rather a smart young lad aren't you. We could do with somebody like you to feed the pantomime horse. Very smart. + +00:00:46.000 --> 00:00:47.500 + +Thank you, sir. + +00:00:47.500 --> 00:00:50.500 + +Now, you were saying. I'm very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very, very rich. + +00:00:50.500 --> 00:00:52.000 + +So er, how about a pound? + +00:00:52.000 --> 00:00:55.000 + +A pound. Yes, I see. Now this loan would be secured by the… + +00:00:55.000 --> 00:00:56.000 + +It's not a loan, sir. + +00:00:56.000 --> 00:00:57.000 + +What? + +00:00:57.000 --> 00:00:58.500 + +It's not a loan. + +00:00:58.500 --> 00:00:59.500 + +Ah. + +00:00:59.500 --> 00:01:02.000 + +You get one of these, sir. [action] Hands over a flag. + +00:01:02.000 --> 00:01:06.000 + +It's a bit small for a share certificate isn't it? Look, I think I'd better run this over to our legal department. If you could possibly pop back on Friday… + +00:01:06.000 --> 00:01:08.500 + +Well do you have to do that, couldn't you just give me the pound? + +00:01:08.500 --> 00:01:10.500 + +Yes, but you see I don't know what it's for. + +00:01:10.500 --> 00:01:12.000 + +It's for the orphans. + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:12.800 + +Yes? + +00:01:12.800 --> 00:01:14.200 + +It's a gift. + +00:01:14.200 --> 00:01:15.200 + +A what? + +00:01:15.200 --> 00:01:16.200 + +A gift. + +00:01:16.200 --> 00:01:17.500 + +Oh a gift! + +00:01:17.500 --> 00:01:18.500 + +Yes. + +00:01:18.500 --> 00:01:20.500 + +A tax dodge. + +00:01:20.500 --> 00:01:21.800 + +No, no, no, no. + +00:01:21.800 --> 00:01:25.000 + +No? Well, I'm awfully sorry I don't understand. Can you just explain exactly what you want. + +00:01:25.000 --> 00:01:28.000 + +Well, I want you to give me a pound, and then I go away and give it to the orphans. + +00:01:28.000 --> 00:01:28.800 + +Yes? + +00:01:28.800 --> 00:01:30.000 + +Well, that's it. + +00:01:30.000 --> 00:01:35.000 + +No, no, no, I don't follow this at all, I mean, I don't want to seem stupid but it looks to me as though I'm a pound down on the whole deal. + +00:01:35.000 --> 00:01:36.500 + +Well, yes you are. + +00:01:36.500 --> 00:01:39.500 + +I am! Well, what is my incentive to give you the pound? + +00:01:39.500 --> 00:01:42.500 + +Well the incentive is - to make the orphans happy. + +00:01:42.500 --> 00:01:45.500 +[stage direction] Genuinely puzzled. + +00:01:45.500 --> 00:01:48.000 + +Happy?… You quite sure you've got this right? + +00:01:48.000 --> 00:01:50.000 + +Yes, lots of people give me money. + +00:01:50.000 --> 00:01:52.000 + +What, just like that? + +00:01:52.000 --> 00:01:53.000 + +Yes. + +00:01:53.000 --> 00:01:56.000 + +Must be sick. I don't suppose you could give me a list of their names and addresses could you? + +00:01:56.000 --> 00:01:58.500 + +No, I just go up to them in the street and ask. + +00:01:58.500 --> 00:02:03.000 + +Good lord! That's the most exciting new idea I've heard in years! It's so simple it's brilliant! Well, if that idea of yours isn't worth a pound I'd like to know what is. [action] Takes the tin. + +00:02:03.000 --> 00:02:04.500 + +Oh, thank you, sir. + +00:02:04.500 --> 00:02:08.000 + +The only trouble is, you gave me the idea before I'd given you the pound. And that's not good business. + +00:02:08.000 --> 00:02:09.500 + +Isn't it? + +00:02:09.500 --> 00:02:12.500 + +No, I'm afraid it isn't. So, um, off you go. [action] Pulls lever; trapdoor opens; Ford drops with yelp. + +00:02:12.500 --> 00:02:14.500 + +Nice to do business with you. + +00:02:14.500 --> 00:02:16.500 +[action] Cut briefly to a Mongol. + +00:02:16.500 --> 00:02:18.000 + +Anyway. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_30_-_'Blood,_Devastation,_Death,_War_and_Horror'/5_Pantomime_horses.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_30_-_'Blood,_Devastation,_Death,_War_and_Horror'/5_Pantomime_horses.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..76770f0c --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_30_-_'Blood,_Devastation,_Death,_War_and_Horror'/5_Pantomime_horses.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,42 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit starts at anchor #5. Auto-generated placeholder timings. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:02.000 +[action] Back to banker; intercom. + +00:00:02.000 --> 00:00:06.000 + +And off we go again. Ah Miss Godfrey could yould send in the pantomime horses please. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:12.000 +[action] Two pantomime horses burst in; pantomime music; routine circling, bumping, posing. + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:26.000 + +Now I've asked you to … [action] They repeat routine. Now I've asked you … [action] They start again. Shut up! [action] They stop. Now I've asked you in here to see me this morning because I'm afraid we're going to have to let one of you go. [action] Heads up; ears waggle; eyes roll. I'm very sorry but the present rationalization of this firm makes it inevitable that we hive one of you off. [action] Water spurts from eyes. Now you may think that this is very harsh behaviour but let me tell you that our management consultants actually queried the necessity for us to employ a pantomime horse at all. [action] Horses register surprise ostentatiously. And so the decision has to be made which one of you is to go. Champion… how many years have you been with this firm? + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:28.000 +[action] Champion stamps his foot three times. + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:30.000 + +Trigger? + +00:00:30.000 --> 00:00:32.000 +[action] Trigger stamps front foot twice, rear foot once. + +00:00:32.000 --> 00:00:38.000 + +I see. Well, it's a difficult decision. But in accordance with our traditional principles of free enterprise and healthy competition I'm going to ask the two of you to fight to the death for it. + +00:00:38.000 --> 00:00:40.500 +[action] Horse whispers in City Gent's ear. + +00:00:40.500 --> 00:00:42.500 + +No, I'm afraid there's no redundancy scheme. + +00:00:42.500 --> 00:00:46.500 +[action] Horses start kicking each other on the shins. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_30_-_'Blood,_Devastation,_Death,_War_and_Horror'/6_Life_and_death_struggles.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_30_-_'Blood,_Devastation,_Death,_War_and_Horror'/6_Life_and_death_struggles.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..1d06b697 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_30_-_'Blood,_Devastation,_Death,_War_and_Horror'/6_Life_and_death_struggles.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,97 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit starts at anchor #6. Auto-generated placeholder timings. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:05.000 + +[dialogue] (German accent) In the hard and unrelenting world of nature the ceaseless struggle for survival continues. + +00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:08.000 +[action] One pantomime horse flees; concedes defeat. + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:15.000 + +[dialogue] This time one of the pantomime horses concedes defeat and so lives to fight another day. [action] Cut: sea lions fighting. + +00:00:15.000 --> 00:00:22.000 + +[dialogue] Here, in a colony of sea lions, we see a huge bull sea lion seeing off an intruding bull who is attempting to intrude on his harem. This pattern of aggressive behaviour is typical of these documentaries. + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:26.000 +[action] Cut: two almost stationary limpets. + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:32.000 + +[dialogue] Here we see two limpets locked in a life or death struggle for territory. The huge bull limpet, enraged by the rock, endeavours to encircle its sprightly opponent. + +00:00:32.000 --> 00:00:36.000 +[action] Shot of wolf standing still. + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:42.000 + +[dialogue] Here we see an ant. This ant is engaged in a life or death struggle with the wolf. You can see the ant creeping up on the wolf on all sixes. [action] Moving arrow superimposed. + +00:00:42.000 --> 00:00:48.000 + +[dialogue] Now he stops to observe. Satisfied that the wolf has not heard him, he approaches nearer. With great skill he chooses his moment and then, quick as a limpet, with one mighty bound [action] Arrow moves to wolf's throat; wolf does not move. + +00:00:48.000 --> 00:00:53.000 + +[dialogue] … buries his fangs in the wolf's neck. The wolf struggles to no avail. A battle of this kind can take anything up to fifteen years because the timber ant has such a tiny mouth. + +00:00:53.000 --> 00:00:57.000 +[action] Distant shot: Heinz Sielmann and Peter Scott fighting violently. + +00:00:57.000 --> 00:01:02.000 + +[dialogue] Here we see Heinz Sielmann engaged in a life or death struggle with Peter Scott. They are engaged in a bitter punch-up over repeat fees on the overseas sales of their nature documentaries. + +00:01:02.000 --> 00:01:06.000 +[action] Another man joins in. + +00:01:06.000 --> 00:01:10.000 + +[dialogue] Now they have been joined by an enraged Jacques Cousteau. This is typical of the harsh and bitchy world of television features. + +00:01:10.000 --> 00:01:13.000 +[action] Shot of honey bear sitting aimlessly. + +00:01:13.000 --> 00:01:17.000 + +[dialogue] Here we see a honey bear not engaged in a life or death struggle about anything. These honey bears are placid and peaceful creatures and consequently bad television. + +00:01:17.000 --> 00:01:21.000 +[action] Shot: pantomime horse running in a wood. + +00:01:21.000 --> 00:01:27.000 + +[dialogue] Here we see a pantomime horse. It is engaged in a life or death struggle for a job with a merchant bank. However, his rival employee, the huge bull pantomime horse, is lying in wait for him. + +00:01:27.000 --> 00:01:30.000 +[action] Weight drops from tree; pantomime horse crushed. + +00:01:30.000 --> 00:01:32.000 + +[dialogue] Poor pantomime horse. + +00:01:32.000 --> 00:01:36.000 +[action] Pantomime goose with bow behind small tree. + +00:01:36.000 --> 00:01:41.000 + +[dialogue] Here we see a pantomime goose engaged in a life or death struggle with Terence Rattigan. [action] Terence walks; goose fires and hits neck; Terence dies. + +00:01:41.000 --> 00:01:43.000 + +[dialogue] Poor Terence. Another victim of this silly film. + +00:01:43.000 --> 00:01:48.000 +[action] Pantomime Princess Margaret waits in undergrowth for breakfast tray gliding on wire. + +00:01:48.000 --> 00:01:54.000 + +[dialogue] The unsuspecting breakfast glides ever closer to its doom. The enraged pantomime royal person is poised for the kill. She raises her harpoon and fires. Pang! Right in the toast. A brief struggle and all is over. Poor breakfast! Another victim of the…. aargh! + +00:01:54.000 --> 00:02:00.000 +[action] Animation begins showing the sudden demise of the previous voice over; carnivorous house story. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_30_-_'Blood,_Devastation,_Death,_War_and_Horror'/7_Mary_recruitment_office.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_30_-_'Blood,_Devastation,_Death,_War_and_Horror'/7_Mary_recruitment_office.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..26da01b6 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_30_-_'Blood,_Devastation,_Death,_War_and_Horror'/7_Mary_recruitment_office.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,143 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit starts at anchor #7. Auto-generated placeholder timings. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[caption] THE MAKERS OF THIS FILM WOULD LIKE TO THANK THE FOLLOWING PEOPLE WHO GAVE US LOTS OF MONEY TO SEE THEIR NAMES IN LIGHTS: VICTOR - HIS FRIEND BOBBY - AND - MARY + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:10.000 +[action] Pull back: 'Mary' part of sign 'Mary Recruitment Office' over shop like army recruiting office. + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:15.000 +[action] RSM exits; hangs sign: 'Sketch just starting - actor wanted'. + +00:00:15.000 --> 00:00:17.500 + +Sketch just starting, actor wanted. + +00:00:17.500 --> 00:00:21.500 +[action] RSM looks around; re-enters. Mr Man arrives, reads sign, enters. + +00:00:21.500 --> 00:00:23.500 + +Good morning. + +00:00:23.500 --> 00:00:25.000 + +Morning, sir. + +00:00:25.000 --> 00:00:27.500 + +I'd like to join the army please. + +00:00:27.500 --> 00:00:30.500 + +I see. Short service or long service commission, sir? + +00:00:30.500 --> 00:00:32.500 + +As long as possible please. + +00:00:32.500 --> 00:00:35.500 + +Right well I'll just take a few particulars and then… + +00:00:35.500 --> 00:00:40.000 +[action] RSM pauses; exits; changes sign letters from 'Mary' to 'Army'; reveals queue of nuns; shoos them away; returns. + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:42.000 + +Shove off! + +00:00:42.000 --> 00:00:46.000 + +Then there'll be a few forms to sign, and of course we'll need references and then a full medical examination by the … + +00:00:46.000 --> 00:00:50.000 + +Yes. Yes, yes I see. [stage direction] Diffidently. I was just wondering whether it would be possible for me to join… the women's army? + +00:00:50.000 --> 00:00:52.500 + +The Women's Royal Army Corps, sir? + +00:00:52.500 --> 00:00:57.000 + +Yes. I was just thinking, you know, if it was possible for me to have my choice … I'd prefer to be in the Women's Royal Amy Corps. + +00:00:57.000 --> 00:01:00.000 + +Well, I'm afraid that the people that recruit here normally go straight into the Scots Guards. + +00:01:00.000 --> 00:01:02.500 + +Which is all… men… I suppose? + +00:01:02.500 --> 00:01:03.800 + +Yes it is. + +00:01:03.800 --> 00:01:06.500 + +Yes. Are there any regiments which are more effeminate than others? + +00:01:06.500 --> 00:01:09.000 + +Well, no sir. I mean, apart from the Marines, they're all dead butch. + +00:01:09.000 --> 00:01:14.000 + +You see, what I really wanted was a regiment where I could be really quiet and have more time to myself to work with fabrics, and creating new concepts in interior design. + +00:01:14.000 --> 00:01:16.000 + +Working with fabrics and experimenting with interior design! + +00:01:16.000 --> 00:01:17.500 + +Yes. + +00:01:17.500 --> 00:01:19.500 + +Oh well you want the Durham Light Infantry then, sir. + +00:01:19.500 --> 00:01:20.800 + +Oh. + +00:01:20.800 --> 00:01:24.000 + +Oh yes. That's the only regiment that's really doing something new with interior design, with colour, texture, line and that. + +00:01:24.000 --> 00:01:25.500 + +I see. + +00:01:25.500 --> 00:01:32.000 + +Oh yes, I mean their use of colour with fabrics is fantastic. I saw their pattern book the other day - beautiful, beautiful. Savage tans, great slabs of black set against aggressive orange. It really makes you want to shout out, this is good! This is real! + +00:01:32.000 --> 00:01:33.500 + +Really? + +00:01:33.500 --> 00:01:40.000 + +Oh yes. I mean the Inniskillin Fusiliers and the Anglian Regiment are all right if you're interested in the art nouveau William Morris revival bit, but if you really want a regiment of the line that is really saying something about interior decor, then you've got to go for the Durham Light Infantry. + +00:01:40.000 --> 00:01:43.000 + +Oh, I've had enough of this. I'm handing in my notice. + +00:01:43.000 --> 00:01:44.500 + +What do you mean? + +00:01:44.500 --> 00:01:50.000 + +Well I mean, when I applied for this job I thought I'd get a few decent lines but you end up doing the whole thing. I mean my last five speeches have been 'really, really - I see - I see' and 'really'. I wouldn't give those lines to a dog. + +00:01:50.000 --> 00:01:55.000 + +All right, all right, all right, sonny. I'll tell you what. We'll do something different. I'll be a bus conductor, and you can be a really funny passenger on a bus. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_30_-_'Blood,_Devastation,_Death,_War_and_Horror'/8_Bus_conductor_sketch.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_30_-_'Blood,_Devastation,_Death,_War_and_Horror'/8_Bus_conductor_sketch.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..4af82eab --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_30_-_'Blood,_Devastation,_Death,_War_and_Horror'/8_Bus_conductor_sketch.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,43 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit starts at anchor #8. Auto-generated placeholder timings. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Cut to bus set; tatty backcloth; Mr Man stands as before; RSM enters dressed as bus conductor with ticket machine, satchel, big arrow through neck; music-hall manner. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:14.000 + +Any more fares please? I've got a chauffeur and every time I go to the lavatory he drives me potty! Boom-boom! One in a row [sings] I'm not unusual. I'm just… + +00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:16.000 + +Fivepenny please. + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:22.000 + +Five beautiful pennies going in to the bag… and you are the lucky winner of… one fivepenny ticket! [action] Hands ticket. What's the Welshman doing under the bed? He's having a leak! Oh they're all in here tonight. [action] Brief film clip of audience laughing. + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:23.500 + +Look! + +00:00:23.500 --> 00:00:26.500 + +I am looking - it's the only way I keep my eyelids apart! Boom-boom! Every one a Maserati! + +00:00:26.500 --> 00:00:29.000 + +Look! You said I was going to be a funny passenger. + +00:00:29.000 --> 00:00:31.500 + +[stage direction] Snaps out of music-hall manner. What do you mean? + +00:00:31.500 --> 00:00:34.000 + +I mean, all I said was, fivepenny please, You can't call that a funny line. + +00:00:34.000 --> 00:00:36.000 + +Well it's the way you said it. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_30_-_'Blood,_Devastation,_Death,_War_and_Horror'/9_The_man_who_makes_people_laugh_uncontrollably.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_30_-_'Blood,_Devastation,_Death,_War_and_Horror'/9_The_man_who_makes_people_laugh_uncontrollably.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..183acfc0 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_30_-_'Blood,_Devastation,_Death,_War_and_Horror'/9_The_man_who_makes_people_laugh_uncontrollably.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,76 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit starts at anchor #9. Auto-generated placeholder timings. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:03.000 +[action] Vox pop of city gent in busy street. + +00:00:03.000 --> 00:00:04.500 + +Fivepenny please. + +00:00:04.500 --> 00:00:08.000 +[action] Stock film: audience rolling with laughter and clapping. + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:12.000 +[action] City gent shrugs, walks; passes two colleagues. + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:13.500 + +Morning. + +00:00:13.500 --> 00:00:17.500 +[action] Colleagues collapse laughing; roll on pavement. City gent hurries into office block. + +00:00:17.500 --> 00:00:20.000 + +Not so warm today, George. + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:23.500 +[action] Porter shrieks with mirth, collapses. City gent into lift with two city gents and a secretary. + +00:00:23.500 --> 00:00:25.000 + +Good morning. + +00:00:25.000 --> 00:00:26.000 + +Good morning. + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:27.500 + +Good morning. + +00:00:27.500 --> 00:00:31.000 +[action] Shrieks of laughter; lift arrives third floor; city gent exits embarrassed; others collapsed in mirth. + +00:00:31.000 --> 00:00:34.000 + +Come in, Mr Horton. + +00:00:34.000 --> 00:00:35.500 +[action] City gent enters. + +00:00:35.500 --> 00:00:37.500 + +Morning, sir. + +00:00:37.500 --> 00:00:41.000 + +Do - do sit down. [stage direction] Indicates chair, fighting laughter. + +00:00:41.000 --> 00:00:42.500 + +Thank you, sir. + +00:00:42.500 --> 00:00:55.000 + +Now then Horton, you've been with us for twenty years, and your work in the accounts department has been immaculate… No no - please don't say anything. As I say, your work has been beyond reproach, but unfortunately the effect you have on your colleagues has undermined the competence… has undermined the competence of this firm to such a point that I'm afraid that I've got no option but to sack you. + +00:00:55.000 --> 00:01:10.000 + +[voice breaking] I'm sorry to hear that, sir. [stage direction] Boss giggles, turns to mantelpiece, struggling not to laugh. It couldn't have come at a worse time. There's school fees for the two boys coming up, and the wife's treatment costing more now … I don't know where the money's coming from as it is. And now I don't see any future … I'd been hoping I'd be able to hang on here just for the last couple of years but… now … I just want to go out and end it all. + +00:01:10.000 --> 00:01:14.000 +[action] Boss collapses in helpless mirth; falls around room. Cut to stock film of terrific audience laughter. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_31__The_All-England_Summarize_Proust_Competition/0_Episode31_head_tail.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_31__The_All-England_Summarize_Proust_Competition/0_Episode31_head_tail.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..b8831a32 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_31__The_All-England_Summarize_Proust_Competition/0_Episode31_head_tail.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,31 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Intro titles and final credits. Placeholder timings auto-generated. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 +[action] Nude man at the organ plays chords. + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:06.500 + +And now… + +00:00:06.500 --> 00:00:08.500 + +It's… + +00:00:08.500 --> 00:00:12.500 +[action] Animated titles. + +00:00:12.500 --> 00:00:15.500 + +Monty Python's Flying Circuses… + +00:19:30.000 --> 00:19:36.000 +[action] Applause and music. A lady with enormous knockers comes on to the side of the stage. + +00:19:36.000 --> 00:19:46.000 +[caption] THE ALL-ENGLAND SUMMARIZE PROUST COMPETITION | A BBC PRODUCTION | WITH MR I. T. BRIDDOCK, 2379, THE TERRACE, HODDESDON. | IT WAS CONCEIVED, WRITTEN AND PERFORMED BY… + +00:19:46.000 --> 00:19:58.000 +[action] Roll usual Monty Python credits and music. Behind them the lady accepts the cup and the singers come back on stage and admire her. Fade out. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_31__The_All-England_Summarize_Proust_Competition/1_Summarize_Proust_Competition.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_31__The_All-England_Summarize_Proust_Competition/1_Summarize_Proust_Competition.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..a23a765c --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_31__The_All-England_Summarize_Proust_Competition/1_Summarize_Proust_Competition.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,119 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE All-England Summarize Proust Competition skit. Placeholder timings auto-generated. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:07.000 +[action] The hall of the Memorial Baths, Swansea, done up for a gala occasion. Stage with flags, bunting and flowers. Echoing audience noise; muffled tannoy announcements. + +00:00:07.000 --> 00:00:38.000 + +Good evening, and welcome to the Arthur Ludlow Memorial Baths, Newport, for this year's finals of the All-England Summarize Proust Competition. As you may remember, each contestant has to give a brief summary of Proust's 'A La Recherche du Temps Perdu', once in a swimsuit and once in evening dress. The field has now narrowed to three finalists and your judges tonight are… Alec and Eric Bedser, Stewart Surridge, Omar Sharif, Laurie Fishlock, Peter May, and Yehudi Menuhin. And right now it's time to meet your host for tonight Arthur Mee! + +00:00:38.000 --> 00:00:48.000 +[action] Showbiz music, applause. Arthur Mee appears from back of stage in spangly jacket; speaks into hollow-sounding PA. + +00:00:48.000 --> 00:01:20.000 + +Good evening and welcome, whereas Proust would say, 'la malade imaginaire de recondition et de toute surveillance est bientôt la même chose'. Remember each contestant this evening has a maximum of fifteen seconds to sum up 'A La Recherche du Temps Perdu' and on the Proustometer over here you can see exactly how far he gets. So let's crack straight on with our first contestant tonight. He's last year's semi-finalist from Luton - Mr Harry Bagot. Hello Harry. Now there's the summarizing spot—you're on the summarizing spot—fifteen seconds from now. + +00:01:20.000 --> 00:01:24.000 +[action] Continuity-type music. The needle of the Proustometer creeps up imperceptibly. + +00:01:24.000 --> 00:01:39.000 + +Proust's novel ostensibly tells of the irrevocability of time lost, the forfeiture of innocence through experience, the reinstallment of extra-temporal values of time regained, ultimately the novel is both optimistic and set within the context of a humane religious experience, re-stating as it does the concept of intemporality. In the first volume, Swarm, the family friend visits… + +00:01:39.000 --> 00:01:42.000 +[action] Gong sounds; chord of music; applause. The meter has hardly risen at all. + +00:01:42.000 --> 00:01:45.000 + +Well tried, Harry. + +00:01:45.000 --> 00:01:57.000 + +A good attempt there but unfortunately he chose a general appraisal of the work, before getting on to the story and as you can see he only got as far as page one of 'Swarm's Way', the first of the seven volumes. A good try though and very nice posture. + +00:01:57.000 --> 00:02:02.000 +[action] Cut back to the stage. + +00:02:02.000 --> 00:02:05.000 + +Harry Bagot, you're from Luton? + +00:02:05.000 --> 00:02:07.500 + +Yes, Arthur, yeah. + +00:02:07.500 --> 00:02:12.000 + +Now Harry what made you first want to try and start summarizing Proust? + +00:02:12.000 --> 00:02:18.000 + +Well I first entered a seaside Summarizing Proust Competition when I was on holiday in Bournemouth, and my doctor encouraged me with it. + +00:02:18.000 --> 00:02:22.000 + +And Harry, what are your hobbies outside summarizing? + +00:02:22.000 --> 00:02:26.000 + +Well, strangling animals, golf and masturbating. + +00:02:26.000 --> 00:02:28.500 + +Well, thank you Harry Bagot. + +00:02:28.500 --> 00:02:32.000 +[action] Harry walks off-stage. Music and applause. + +00:02:32.000 --> 00:02:38.000 + +Well there he goes. Harry Bagot. He must have let himself down a bit on the hobbies, golf's not very popular around here, but never mind, a good try. + +00:02:38.000 --> 00:02:50.000 + +Thank you ladies and gentlemen. Mr Rutherford from Leicester, are you ready Ronald? Right. On the summarizing spot. You have got fifteen seconds from now. + +00:02:50.000 --> 00:03:06.000 + +Er, well, Swann, Swann, there's this house, there's this house, and er, it's in the morning, it's in the morning - no, it's the evening, in the evening and er, there's a garden and er, this bloke comes in - bloke comes in - what's his name - what's his name, er just said it - big bloke - Swann, Swann + +00:03:06.000 --> 00:03:09.000 +[action] Gong sounds. Mee pushes Ronald out. + +00:03:09.000 --> 00:03:23.000 + +And now ladies and gentlemen, I'd like you to welcome the last of our all-England finalists this evening, from Bingley, the Bolton Choral Society and their leader Superintendent McGough. All right Bingley, remember you've got fifteen seconds to summarize Proust in his entirety starting from now. + +00:03:23.000 --> 00:03:28.000 + +Proust, in his first book wrote about… fa la la… + +00:03:28.000 --> 00:03:32.000 + +Proust in his first book wrote about… + +00:03:32.000 --> 00:03:36.000 + +He wrote about… + +00:03:36.000 --> 00:03:44.000 +[action] They continue contrapuntally, in madrigal, never getting beyond these words until they rallentando to say… + +00:03:44.000 --> 00:03:48.000 + +Proust in his first book wrote about the… + +00:03:48.000 --> 00:03:51.000 +[action] Gong sounds. + +00:03:51.000 --> 00:03:58.000 + +Very ambitious try there, but in fact the least successful of the evening, they didn't even get as far as the first volume. + +00:03:58.000 --> 00:04:06.000 + +Well ladies and gentlemen, I don't think any of our contestants this evening have succeeded in encapsulating the intricacies of Proust's masterwork, so I'm going to award the first prize this evening to the girl with the biggest tits. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_31__The_All-England_Summarize_Proust_Competition/2_Everest_climbed_by_hairdressers.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_31__The_All-England_Summarize_Proust_Competition/2_Everest_climbed_by_hairdressers.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..0f188e78 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_31__The_All-England_Summarize_Proust_Competition/2_Everest_climbed_by_hairdressers.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,115 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Hairdressers attempt Everest. Placeholder timings auto-generated. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:08.000 +[action] Stock film of Everest. Whistling wind; stirring music. + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:12.000 + +Mount Everest. Forbidding. Aloof. Terrifying. The mountain with the biggest tits in the world. + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:14.000 +[action] Sound of gong. + +00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:16.000 + +Start again! + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:20.000 +[action] A very silly loony leans into shot on overlay and waves. + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:40.000 + +Mount Everest. Forbidding. Aloof. Terrifying. This year, this remote Himalayan mountain, this mystical temple, surrounded by the most difficult terrain in the world, repulsed yet another attempt to conquer it. This time, by the International Hairdresser's Expedition. In such freezing, adverse conditions, man comes very close to breaking point. What was the real cause of the disharmony which destroyed their chances at success? + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:46.000 +[action] Three head-and-shoulders shots of mountaineers: frost in beards, snow glasses, Everest headgear. + +00:00:46.000 --> 00:00:50.000 + +Well, people would keep taking my hairdryer and never returning it. + +00:00:50.000 --> 00:00:53.500 + +There was a lot of bitching in the tents. + +00:00:53.500 --> 00:00:56.500 + +You couldn't get near the mirror. + +00:00:56.500 --> 00:01:02.500 +[action] Cut to colonel figure, digging in a garden in Jersey. + +00:01:02.500 --> 00:01:12.000 + +The leader of the expedition was Colonel Sir John 'Teasy-Weasy' Butler, veteran of K2, Annapurna, and Vidals. His plan was to ignore the usual route around the South Col and to make straight for the top. + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:16.000 +[action] Photo of Everest with superimposed route dots. + +00:01:16.000 --> 00:01:36.000 + +We established base salon here, and climbed quite steadily up to Mario's here. From here using crampons and cutting ice steps as we went, we moved steadily up the Lhotse Face to the North Ridge, establishing camp three where we could get a hot meal, a manicure, and a shampoo and set. + +00:01:36.000 --> 00:01:40.000 +[action] Stock film of people actually climbing Everest. + +00:01:40.000 --> 00:01:52.000 + +Could it work? Could this eighteen-year old hairdresser from Brixton succeed where others had failed? The situation was complicated by the imminent arrival of the monsoon storms. Patrice takes up the story. + +00:01:52.000 --> 00:01:58.000 +[action] Interior of hairdresser's salon. Patrice speaks into mirror while blow-drying and curling a lady's hair. + +00:01:58.000 --> 00:02:07.000 + +Well, we knew as well as anyone that the monsoons were due, but the thing was, Ricky and I had just had a blow dry and rinse, and we couldn't go out for a couple of days. + +00:02:07.000 --> 00:02:11.000 +[action] Stock film of some people leaving a little tent on a mountain. + +00:02:11.000 --> 00:02:28.000 + +After a blazing row, the Germans and Italians had turned back, taking with them the last of the hair nets. On the third day a blizzard blew up. Temperatures fell to minus thirty centigrade. Inside the little tent, things were getting desperate. + +00:02:28.000 --> 00:02:36.000 +[action] Inside the tent in vicious blizzard. Ricky and another member under hairdryers in full climbing gear; one reads Vogue; Ricky does his nails. + +00:02:36.000 --> 00:02:42.000 + +Well, things have got so bad that we've been forced to use the last of the heavy oxygen equipment just to keep the dryers going. + +00:02:42.000 --> 00:02:44.500 + +Cup of Milo, love. + +00:02:44.500 --> 00:02:48.000 + +Oh, she's a treas. + +00:02:48.000 --> 00:02:52.000 +[action] Wide shot of Everest. + +00:02:52.000 --> 00:03:12.000 + +But a new factor had entered the race. A team of French chiropodists, working with brand new cornplasters and Doctor Scholl's Mountaineering Sandals, were covering ground fast. The Glasgow Orpheus Male Voice Choir were tackling the difficult North Col. Altogether, fourteen expeditions were at his heels. This was it. Ricky had to make a decision. + +00:03:12.000 --> 00:03:16.000 +[action] Cut back to Patrice in the salon. + +00:03:16.000 --> 00:03:19.000 + +Well, he decided to open a salon. + +00:03:19.000 --> 00:03:22.000 + +It was a tremendous success. + +00:03:22.000 --> 00:03:28.000 +[action] Cinema-style adverts with still photos. + +00:03:28.000 --> 00:03:46.000 + +Challenging Everest? Why not drop in at Ricky Pules' - only 24,000 feet from this cinema. Ricky and Maurice offer a variety of styles for the well-groomed climber. Like Sherpa Tensing and Sir Edmond Hillary be number one on top, when you're Number One on Top? + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_31__The_All-England_Summarize_Proust_Competition/3_Fire_brigade.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_31__The_All-England_Summarize_Proust_Competition/3_Fire_brigade.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..c6690fd0 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_31__The_All-England_Summarize_Proust_Competition/3_Fire_brigade.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,263 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Mrs Little and the fire brigade party. Placeholder timings auto-generated. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Animated sketch leads to little old Mrs Little on the phone in her hall; fussy ducks-on-wall house. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:08.500 + +Hello, is that the fire brigade? + +00:00:08.500 --> 00:00:12.000 +[action] Cut to fire station. + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:14.500 + +No, sorry, wrong number. + +00:00:14.500 --> 00:00:24.000 +[action] Pull out: firemen in full gear amid equipment and gleaming engine; soldering crystal set, cooking, embroidery, sewing; first fireman at phone goes back to cleaning budgie cage. + +00:00:24.000 --> 00:00:27.000 + +That phone's not stopped ringing all day. + +00:00:27.000 --> 00:00:31.000 + +What happens when you've mixed the batter, do you dice the ham with the coriander? + +00:00:31.000 --> 00:00:35.000 + +No, no, you put them in separately when the vine leaves are ready. + +00:00:35.000 --> 00:00:36.500 +[action] Phone rings. + +00:00:36.500 --> 00:00:38.500 + +Oh, no, not again. + +00:00:38.500 --> 00:00:41.000 + +Take it off the hook. + +00:00:41.000 --> 00:00:44.000 +[action] First fireman takes phone off hook. + +00:00:44.000 --> 00:00:48.000 +[action] Back to Mrs Little on phone; looks at receiver then listens again. + +00:00:48.000 --> 00:00:51.000 + +I can't get the fire brigade Mervyn. + +00:00:51.000 --> 00:00:55.000 +[action] Mervyn, her 38-year-old, 6'8" son appears. + +00:00:55.000 --> 00:00:58.500 + +Here, let me try, dear. You go and play the cello. + +00:00:58.500 --> 00:01:01.000 + +Oh it doesn't do any good, dear. + +00:01:01.000 --> 00:01:04.500 + +Look. Do you want the little hamster to live or not? + +00:01:04.500 --> 00:01:06.500 + +Yes I do, Mervyn. + +00:01:06.500 --> 00:01:08.500 + +Well go and play the cello! + +00:01:08.500 --> 00:01:12.000 +[action] She looks helplessly, then goes into sitting room. Mervyn dials. + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:24.000 + +Hello, hello, operator? Yes we're trying to get the fire brigade … No, the fire brigade. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, what? … Size eight. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, no of course not, Yes… + +00:01:24.000 --> 00:01:27.000 +[action] Mrs Little appears, dabbing eyes with handkerchief. + +00:01:27.000 --> 00:01:30.000 +[action] (touching Mervyn gently on the arm) He's gone, dear. + +00:01:30.000 --> 00:01:31.500 + +What? + +00:01:31.500 --> 00:01:33.500 + +He's slipped away. + +00:01:33.500 --> 00:01:35.000 + +What? + +00:01:35.000 --> 00:01:38.000 + +The sodding hamster's dead! + +00:01:38.000 --> 00:01:42.000 +[action] (broken) Oh no!! What were you playing? + +00:01:42.000 --> 00:01:45.000 + +Some Mozart concertos, dear. + +00:01:45.000 --> 00:01:48.000 + +What… How did he… ? + +00:01:48.000 --> 00:01:54.000 + +His eyes just closed, and he fell into the wastepaper basket. I've covered him with a copy of the 'Charlie George Football Book'. + +00:01:54.000 --> 00:01:58.000 +[action] (handing her the phone) Right, you hang on. I must go and see him. + +00:01:58.000 --> 00:02:04.000 + +There was nothing we could do, Mervyn. If we'd have had the whole Philharmonic Orchestra in there, he'd still have gone. + +00:02:04.000 --> 00:02:07.500 + +I'm going upstairs, I can't bear it. + +00:02:07.500 --> 00:02:10.500 + +(restraining him) There isn't an upstairs dear, it's a bungalow. + +00:02:10.500 --> 00:02:12.500 + +Damn. + +00:02:12.500 --> 00:02:28.000 +[action] (into the phone) Hello, I'm sorry to keep you waiting, It's just that… (she takes her shoe off and looks inside) size three, yes it's just - we've lost a dear one and my son was … yes, that's right, size eight, yes and… Oh I see… yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, I see, yes, yes, I, I … Yes, yes. No … no… yes, I see. They can't get the fire brigade Mervyn - will the Boys' Brigade do? + +00:02:28.000 --> 00:02:30.000 + +(off) No! They'd be useless! + +00:02:30.000 --> 00:02:36.000 + +No, he doesn't want anyone at the moment, thank you. No, yes, yes, no thank you for trying, yes, yes, … no, Saxones, yes, yes thank you, bye, bye. + +00:02:36.000 --> 00:02:42.000 +[action] As she puts the phone down the front door opens; huge African warrior with spear and shield enters with suitcases. + +00:02:42.000 --> 00:02:44.500 + +Mummy! + +00:02:44.500 --> 00:02:52.000 + +Eamonn. Mervyn! Look it's our Eamonn - oh let me look at you, tell me how… how is it in Dublin? + +00:02:52.000 --> 00:02:56.000 + +Well, things is pretty bad there at the moment but there does seem some hope of a constitutional settlement. + +00:02:56.000 --> 00:02:58.500 + +Oh don't talk. Let me just look at you. + +00:02:58.500 --> 00:03:01.500 + +Great to be home, mummy. How are you? + +00:03:01.500 --> 00:03:04.500 + +Oh, I'm fine. I must just go upstairs and get your room ready. + +00:03:04.500 --> 00:03:06.500 + +It's a bungalow, mummy. + +00:03:06.500 --> 00:03:12.000 + +Oh damn, yes. Mervyn, Mervyn - look who's here, it's our Eamonn come back to see us. + +00:03:12.000 --> 00:03:15.000 +[action] Mervyn appears, still shattered. + +00:03:15.000 --> 00:03:17.000 + +Hello, Eamonn. + +00:03:17.000 --> 00:03:18.500 + +Hello, Merv. + +00:03:18.500 --> 00:03:21.000 + +How was Dublin? + +00:03:21.000 --> 00:03:26.000 + +Well as I was telling mummy here, things is pretty bad there at the moment but there does seem some hope of a constitutional settlement. + +00:03:26.000 --> 00:03:28.500 +[action] Phone rings. + +00:03:28.500 --> 00:03:36.000 + +(answering phone) Hello, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes - what? what? … (looking at Eamonn's bare foot) Size seven. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes …. it's the fire brigade, they want to know if they can come round Thursday evening. + +00:03:36.000 --> 00:03:41.000 + +Oh no, Thursday's the Industrial Relations Bill Dinner Dance. Can't they make it another day? + +00:03:41.000 --> 00:03:46.000 + +(into the phone) Hello, no Thursday's right out. Yes, yes, yes, yes… + +00:03:46.000 --> 00:03:52.000 +[action] Fade up on dinner-jacketed announcer at table with bowl of flowers. A hand waves from inside the bowl. + +00:03:52.000 --> 00:03:55.000 + +And so it was the fire brigade eventually came round on Friday night. + +00:03:55.000 --> 00:04:08.000 +[action] Fire engines skid out of station and roar away (speeded up). They skid to a halt outside the Littles' house. Firemen pour out and swarm in through windows. + +00:04:08.000 --> 00:04:16.000 +[action] Interior sitting room laid out for cocktail party. Mervyn in evening dress, depressed. Mrs Little in faded cocktail dress. Eamonn still in warpaint with spear and shield. Firemen appear. + +00:04:16.000 --> 00:04:20.000 + +Oh, so glad you could come. What would you like to drink? Gin and tonic? Sherry? + +00:04:20.000 --> 00:04:28.000 + +[dialogue] A drop of sherry would be lovely. [dialogue] We do like being called out to these little parties, they're much better than fires. + +00:04:28.000 --> 00:04:31.000 +[action] Phone rings. Half the firemen go to answer it. + +00:04:31.000 --> 00:04:33.000 + +(off) Yes, yes yes. + +00:04:33.000 --> 00:04:36.000 + +Well, how was Dublin, Eamonn? + +00:04:36.000 --> 00:04:42.000 + +Well, as I was telling mummy and Mervyn earlier, things is pretty bad there at the moment but there does seem some hope of a constitutional… + +00:04:42.000 --> 00:04:54.000 +[action] Mrs Little to camera: Look at them enjoying themselves. Shot of party in hall; fireman on phone; they keep looking at their shoe sizes. + +00:04:54.000 --> 00:04:58.000 + +You know I used to dread parties until I watched 'Party Hints by Veronica'. I think it's on now… + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_31__The_All-England_Summarize_Proust_Competition/4_Our_Eamonn.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_31__The_All-England_Summarize_Proust_Competition/4_Our_Eamonn.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..fcb3da29 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_31__The_All-England_Summarize_Proust_Competition/4_Our_Eamonn.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,58 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Eamonn returns home; continues fire brigade storyline. Placeholder timings auto-generated. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Front door opens; huge African warrior Eamonn enters with suitcases. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:08.000 + +Mummy! + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:18.000 + +Eamonn. Mervyn! Look it's our Eamonn - oh let me look at you, tell me how… how is it in Dublin? + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:22.000 + +Well, things is pretty bad there at the moment but there does seem some hope of a constitutional settlement. + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:24.000 + +Oh don't talk. Let me just look at you. + +00:00:24.000 --> 00:00:27.000 + +Great to be home, mummy. How are you? + +00:00:27.000 --> 00:00:30.000 + +Oh, I'm fine. I must just go upstairs and get your room ready. + +00:00:30.000 --> 00:00:32.000 + +It's a bungalow, mummy. + +00:00:32.000 --> 00:00:37.000 + +Oh damn, yes. Mervyn, Mervyn - look who's here, it's our Eamonn come back to see us. + +00:00:37.000 --> 00:00:40.000 +[action] Mervyn appears; still shattered. + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:41.500 + +Hello, Eamonn. + +00:00:41.500 --> 00:00:43.000 + +Hello, Merv. + +00:00:43.000 --> 00:00:45.000 + +How was Dublin? + +00:00:45.000 --> 00:00:49.000 + +Well as I was telling mummy here, things is pretty bad there at the moment but there does seem some hope of a constitutional settlement. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_31__The_All-England_Summarize_Proust_Competition/5_'Party_Hints'_with_Veronica_Smalls.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_31__The_All-England_Summarize_Proust_Competition/5_'Party_Hints'_with_Veronica_Smalls.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..de5ac8af --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_31__The_All-England_Summarize_Proust_Competition/5_'Party_Hints'_with_Veronica_Smalls.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,20 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Veronica’s Party Hints segment. Placeholder timings auto-generated. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Panning shot across mountains in CinemaScope format. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:18.000 +[caption] THE BRITISH BROADCASTING CORPORATION IN ASSOCIATION WITH TRANSWORLD INTERNATIONAL AND NIMROD PRODUCTIONS PRESENT … PARTY HINTS BY VERONICA SMALLS … A CINEMASCOPE PRODUCTION. + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:22.000 +[action] Cut to Veronica in a chintzy kitchen set. + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:01:18.000 + +Hello, Last week on 'Party Hints' I showed you how to make a small plate of goulash go round twenty-six people, how to get the best out of your canapés, and how to unblock your loo. This week I'm going to tell you what to do if there is an armed communist uprising near your home when you're having a party. Well obviously it'll depend how far you've got with your party when the signal for Red Revolt is raised. If you're just having preliminary aperitifs - Dubonnet, a sherry or a sparkling white wine - then the guests will obviously be in a fairly formal mood and it will be difficult to tell which are the communist agitators. So the thing to do is to get some cloth and some bits of old paper, put it down on the floor and shoot everybody. This will deal with the Red Menace on your own doorstep. If you're having canapés, as I showed you last week, or an outdoor barbecue, then the thing to do is to set fire to all houses in the street. This will stir up anti-communist hatred and your neighbours will be right with you as you organize counter-revolutionary terror. So you see, if you act promptly enough, any left-wing uprising can be dealt with by the end of the party. Bye… + +00:01:18.000 --> 00:01:24.000 +[action] Animation: one dozen communist revolutions. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_31__The_All-England_Summarize_Proust_Competition/6_Language_laboratory.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_31__The_All-England_Summarize_Proust_Competition/6_Language_laboratory.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..bf2e5b89 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_31__The_All-England_Summarize_Proust_Competition/6_Language_laboratory.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,163 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Mr Mann shows Tick around various language booths. Placeholder timings auto-generated. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Cut to language laboratory; line of booths, each with earphones, mic, tape recorder, swivel chair. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:14.000 + +Bleck people. Bleck people. Rrrhodesian. Kill the blecks. Rrhodesian. Smith, Smith. Kill the blecks within the five principles. + +00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:18.000 +[action] He starts to rewind the tape recorder. Nods at Mr Mann; they move to second booth. + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:22.000 + +I'm afraid I cannot comment on that until it's been officially hushed up. + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:24.500 + +This is our politicians booth. + +00:00:24.500 --> 00:00:30.000 + +While there is no undue cause for concern, there is certainly no room for complacency. Ha, ha, ha. He, he, he. + +00:00:30.000 --> 00:00:33.000 +[action] They pass to the third booth. + +00:00:33.000 --> 00:00:37.000 + +Well I'll go, I'll go to the foot of our stairs. Ee ecky thump. Put wood in 'ole, muther. + +00:00:37.000 --> 00:00:42.000 +[action] Mr Mann taps him. He removes his earphones. + +00:00:42.000 --> 00:00:43.500 + +Yes? + +00:00:43.500 --> 00:00:45.500 + +Ee ecky thump. + +00:00:45.500 --> 00:00:47.000 + +(trying it) Ee ecky thump. + +00:00:47.000 --> 00:00:49.000 + +Ee ecky thump! + +00:00:49.000 --> 00:00:50.500 + +Ee ecky thump! + +00:00:50.500 --> 00:00:52.000 + +Excellent. + +00:00:52.000 --> 00:00:55.000 + +Thank you, sir. + +00:00:55.000 --> 00:00:57.000 + +It's a really quick method of learning. + +00:00:57.000 --> 00:00:59.000 + +Can you smell gas or is it me? + +00:00:59.000 --> 00:01:02.000 + +(very diffident) Looks jolly good. + +00:01:02.000 --> 00:01:06.000 +[action] They come to the fourth booth; very city-type gent. + +00:01:06.000 --> 00:01:10.000 + +Hello, big boy. Oo varda the ome. D'you want a nice time? + +00:01:10.000 --> 00:01:11.500 + +Very good. + +00:01:11.500 --> 00:01:13.000 + +(butch) Thank you very much, sir. + +00:01:13.000 --> 00:01:16.000 +[action] Pass fifth booth; occupant making silly noises. + +00:01:16.000 --> 00:01:19.000 + +And we control everything from here. + +00:01:19.000 --> 00:01:20.500 + +Superb. + +00:01:20.500 --> 00:01:23.000 + +Well then what sort of thing were you looking for? + +00:01:23.000 --> 00:01:26.000 + +Well, er, really something to make me a little less insignificant? + +00:01:26.000 --> 00:01:32.000 + +Oh, I see sort of 'Now look here, you may be Chairman but your bloody pusillanimous behaviour makes me vomit!' That sort of thing?… + +00:01:32.000 --> 00:01:34.000 + +Oh no, no, no, not really no. + +00:01:34.000 --> 00:01:42.000 + +Oh I see, well perhaps something a bit more sort of Clive Jenkins-ish? Perhaps - sort of (Welsh accent) 'Mr Smarmy so-called Harold Wilson can call himself pragmatic until he's blue in the breasts'. + +00:01:42.000 --> 00:01:46.000 + +Oh no, I really want something that will make people be attracted to me like a magnet. + +00:01:46.000 --> 00:01:49.000 + +I see, well, you want our 'Life and Soul of the Party' tape then, I think. + +00:01:49.000 --> 00:01:50.500 + +What's that? + +00:01:50.500 --> 00:01:58.000 + +Well it's sort of 'Ello squire, haven't seen you for a bit, haven't seen you for a bit either, Beryl. Two pints of wallop please, love. Still driving the Jensen then? Cheer up Jack it may never happen, what's your poison then?' + +00:01:58.000 --> 00:02:00.000 + +Fantastic, yes. + +00:02:00.000 --> 00:02:02.000 + +Right, I'll just see if we've got the tape. + +00:02:02.000 --> 00:02:10.000 +[action] He puts the headphones on. The entire back wall of booth people swing round and do a little thirties routine, kicking legs while wearing earphones. + +00:02:10.000 --> 00:02:12.000 +[caption] SANDY WILSON'S VERSION OF "THE DEVILS" + +00:02:12.000 --> 00:02:26.000 + +Boo boopee doo; Boo boopee doo; Scuby duby duby doo-oo! Hello operator; Is that the central line; Give me the Piccadilly number; Nine one o nine; Mr operator now that number's wrong; So come on everybody; Let's sing this song… Proust in his first book wrote about… etc …. + +00:02:26.000 --> 00:02:28.000 +[action] Gong sounds. + +00:02:28.000 --> 00:02:30.000 + +Start again. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_31__The_All-England_Summarize_Proust_Competition/7_Travel_agent.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_31__The_All-England_Summarize_Proust_Competition/7_Travel_agent.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..e16c59e8 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_31__The_All-England_Summarize_Proust_Competition/7_Travel_agent.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,234 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Bounder of Adventure and Mr Smoke-Too-Much. Placeholder timings auto-generated. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Loony leans into shot and waves. Fade to black. Fade up on close-up of picture of Everest. Pull back to reveal travel agent's office. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:12.000 + +Mount Everest, forbidding, aloof, terrifyring. The highest place on earth. No I'm sorry we don't go there. No. + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:18.000 +[action] Camera reveals office; Bounder at desk replacing telephone. Tourist enters and approaches secretary. + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:20.000 + +Good morning. + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:23.000 + +Oh good morning. Do you want to go upstairs? + +00:00:23.000 --> 00:00:24.000 + +What? + +00:00:24.000 --> 00:00:28.000 + +Do you want to go upstairs? Or have you come to arrange a holiday? + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:30.000 + +Er…….to arrange a holiday. + +00:00:30.000 --> 00:00:31.500 + +Oh sorry. + +00:00:31.500 --> 00:00:34.500 + +What's all this about going upstairs? + +00:00:34.500 --> 00:00:36.500 + +Oh, nothing, nothing. Now where were you thinking of going? + +00:00:36.500 --> 00:00:38.000 + +India. + +00:00:38.000 --> 00:00:40.000 + +Ah one of our adventure holidays! + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:41.500 + +Yes! + +00:00:41.500 --> 00:00:45.000 + +Well you'd better see Mr Bounder about that. Mr Bounder, this gentleman is interested in the India Overland. + +00:00:45.000 --> 00:00:48.000 +[action] Tourist walks to Bounder's desk; greeted. + +00:00:48.000 --> 00:00:50.000 + +Ah good morning. I'm Bounder of Adventure. + +00:00:50.000 --> 00:00:52.000 + +My name is Smoke-Too-Much. + +00:00:52.000 --> 00:00:53.000 + +What? + +00:00:53.000 --> 00:00:55.500 + +My name is Smoke-Too-Much. Mr Smoke-Too-Much. + +00:00:55.500 --> 00:00:57.500 + +Well you'd better cut down a little then. + +00:00:57.500 --> 00:00:59.000 + +What? + +00:00:59.000 --> 00:01:01.000 + +You'd better cut down a little then. + +00:01:01.000 --> 00:01:04.000 + +Oh I see! Cut down a bit, for Smoke-Too-Much. + +00:01:04.000 --> 00:01:07.000 + +Yes, he he…I expect you get people making jokes about your name all the time, eh? + +00:01:07.000 --> 00:01:11.000 + +No, no actually. Actually, it never struck me before. Smoke…too…much! + +00:01:11.000 --> 00:01:13.500 + +Anyway, you're interested in one of our adventure holidays, eh? + +00:01:13.500 --> 00:01:15.000 + +Yes. I saw your advert in the bolour supplement. + +00:01:15.000 --> 00:01:16.500 + +The what? + +00:01:16.500 --> 00:01:18.500 + +The bolour supplement. + +00:01:18.500 --> 00:01:20.000 + +The colour supplement? + +00:01:20.000 --> 00:01:22.500 + +Yes. I'm sorry I can't say the letter 'B'. + +00:01:22.500 --> 00:01:23.500 + +C? + +00:01:23.500 --> 00:01:26.000 + +Yes that's right. It's all due to a trauma I suffered when I was a sboolboy. I was attacked by a bat. + +00:01:26.000 --> 00:01:27.000 + +A cat? + +00:01:27.000 --> 00:01:28.500 + +No a bat. + +00:01:28.500 --> 00:01:30.000 + +Can you say the letter 'K'? + +00:01:30.000 --> 00:01:35.000 + +Oh yes, Khaki, king, kettle, Kuwait, Keble Bollege Oxford. + +00:01:35.000 --> 00:01:38.000 + +Why don't you say the letter 'K' instead of the letter 'C'? + +00:01:38.000 --> 00:01:40.000 + +What you mean…..spell bolour with a K? + +00:01:40.000 --> 00:01:42.000 + +Yes. + +00:01:42.000 --> 00:01:44.000 + +Kolour. Oh that's very good, I never thought of that. + +00:01:44.000 --> 00:01:45.500 + +Anyway, about the holiday.. + +00:01:45.500 --> 00:01:50.000 + +Well I saw your adverts in the paper and I've been on package tours several times, you see, and I decided that this was for me. + +00:01:50.000 --> 00:01:51.000 + +Ah good. + +00:01:51.000 --> 00:01:58.000 + +[dialogue] Yes I quite agree with you, I mean what's the point of being treated like a sheep… [monologue continues] + +00:01:58.000 --> 00:02:24.000 + +[dialogue] Extended rant about Watney's Red Barrel, package tours, Hotel Miramars/Bellvues/Bontinentals, cabaret Flamenco for Foreigners. + +00:02:24.000 --> 00:02:26.000 + +Will you be quiet please. + +00:02:26.000 --> 00:02:40.000 + +[dialogue] Rant continues about postcards, greasy food, Watney's Red Barrel, accordionist playing 'Maybe it's because I'm a Londoner'. + +00:02:40.000 --> 00:02:41.500 + +Shut up. + +00:02:41.500 --> 00:02:52.000 + +[dialogue] More rant; Bounder escalates to 'Shut up!!!'. + +00:02:52.000 --> 00:02:56.000 + +Shut your bloody gob! I've had enough of this, I'm going to ring the police. + +00:02:56.000 --> 00:03:02.000 +[action] Cut to police station corner: one policeman knitting, another making palm tree out of old newspapers. Phone rings. + +00:03:02.000 --> 00:03:04.000 + +Oh…take it off the hook. + +00:03:04.000 --> 00:03:08.000 +[action] Back to travel agent. Tourist still ranting. Bounder looks crossly at phone, puts it down, then dials again. + +00:03:08.000 --> 00:03:18.000 + +Hello operator, operator…I'm trying to get the police…the police yes, what? (takes off his shoe and looks inside) nine and a half, nine and a half, yes, yes…I see…well can you keep trying please… + +00:03:18.000 --> 00:03:36.000 + +[dialogue] Tourist continues extended rant about airports, cholera, Guardia, Franco, etc. + +00:03:36.000 --> 00:03:40.000 +[action] Secretary looks into camera: 'Oh! Sorry to keep you waiting…will you come this way please…' Camera follows her to documentary interview set. + +00:03:40.000 --> 00:03:44.000 + +Here they are. Just here will do fine! Goodbye. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_31__The_All-England_Summarize_Proust_Competition/8_Watney's_Red_Barrel.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_31__The_All-England_Summarize_Proust_Competition/8_Watney's_Red_Barrel.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..1921671a --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_31__The_All-England_Summarize_Proust_Competition/8_Watney's_Red_Barrel.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,24 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Continuing the travel agent rant focused on package tours and Watney’s Red Barrel. Placeholder timings auto-generated. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:14.000 + +Yes I quite agree with you, I mean what's the point of being treated like a sheep… [continues railing against Majorcan bodegas selling fish and chips and Watney's Red Barrel…] + +00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:30.000 + +…endless Hotel Miramars and Bellvueses and Bontinentals… International Cuisine… every Thursday night a bloody cabaret… + +00:00:30.000 --> 00:00:34.000 + +Yes, yes, now… + +00:00:34.000 --> 00:00:52.000 + +…adenoidal typists from Birmingham… Dr Scholl sandals… excursion to Roman ruins where you can buy cherryade and melted ice cream and bleedin' Watney's Red Barrel… + +00:00:52.000 --> 00:00:54.000 + +Will you be quiet please. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_31__The_All-England_Summarize_Proust_Competition/9_Theory_on_Brontosauruses_by_Anne_Elk_(Miss).vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_31__The_All-England_Summarize_Proust_Competition/9_Theory_on_Brontosauruses_by_Anne_Elk_(Miss).vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..156d5695 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_31__The_All-England_Summarize_Proust_Competition/9_Theory_on_Brontosauruses_by_Anne_Elk_(Miss).vtt @@ -0,0 +1,223 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Anne Elk presents her brontosaurus theory; cross-over with fire brigade song and loony. Placeholder timings auto-generated. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 +[action] Presenter sitting with a guest in late-night line-up set. + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:05.500 + +Good evening. + +00:00:05.500 --> 00:00:08.000 +[caption] THRUST - A QUITE CONTROVERSIAL LOOK AT THE WORLD AROUND US + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:12.000 + +I have with me tonight Anne Elk. Mrs Anne Elk. + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:13.500 + +Miss. + +00:00:13.500 --> 00:00:15.500 +[caption] ANNE ELK + +00:00:15.500 --> 00:00:18.000 + +You have a new theory about the brontosaurus. + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:21.000 + +Can I just say here Chris for one moment that I have a new theory about the brontosaurus. + +00:00:21.000 --> 00:00:23.000 + +Exactly. What is it? + +00:00:23.000 --> 00:00:24.500 + +Where? + +00:00:24.500 --> 00:00:26.000 + +No, no your new theory? + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:27.500 + +Oh, what is my theory? + +00:00:27.500 --> 00:00:30.500 + +Yes. + +00:00:30.500 --> 00:00:34.000 + +Oh what is my theory that it is. Yes, well you may well ask me what is my theory. + +00:00:34.000 --> 00:00:35.500 + +I am asking. + +00:00:35.500 --> 00:00:42.000 + +Good for you. My word yes. Well Chris, what is it that it is - this theory of mine. Well, this is what it is - my theory that I have, that is to say, which is mine, is mine. + +00:00:42.000 --> 00:00:45.000 + +Yes, I know it's yours, what is it? + +00:00:45.000 --> 00:00:56.000 + +This is it. (clears throat at length) My theory that belongs to me is as follows. (clears throat at great length) This is how it goes. The next thing I'm going to say is my theory. Ready? + +00:00:56.000 --> 00:00:57.500 + +Yes! + +00:00:57.500 --> 00:01:06.000 + +My Theory by A. Elk. Brackets Miss, brackets. This theory goes as follows and begins now. All brontosauruses are thin at one end, much much thicker in the middle, and then thin again at the far end. That is my theory, it is mine, and belongs to me and I own it, and what it is too. + +00:01:06.000 --> 00:01:08.000 + +That's it, is it? + +00:01:08.000 --> 00:01:09.500 + +Spot on, Chris. + +00:01:09.500 --> 00:01:14.000 + +Well, er, this theory of yours seems to have hit the nail on the head. + +00:01:14.000 --> 00:01:15.500 + +And it's mine. + +00:01:15.500 --> 00:01:19.000 + +Yes, thank you for coming along to the studio. Thank you. + +00:01:19.000 --> 00:01:20.500 + +My pleasure, Chris… + +00:01:20.500 --> 00:01:22.500 + +Next week Britain's newest wasp farm… + +00:01:22.500 --> 00:01:23.500 + +It's been a lot of fun. + +00:01:23.500 --> 00:01:25.000 + +Yes, thank you very much. + +00:01:25.000 --> 00:01:26.500 + +Saying what my theory is. + +00:01:26.500 --> 00:01:28.000 + +Yes, thank you. + +00:01:28.000 --> 00:01:29.500 + +And whose it is. + +00:01:29.500 --> 00:01:33.000 + +Yes, thank you - that's all - thank you. …opens next week. + +00:01:33.000 --> 00:01:34.500 + +I have another theory. + +00:01:34.500 --> 00:01:35.500 + +Yes. + +00:01:35.500 --> 00:01:37.500 + +Called my second theory, or my theory number two. + +00:01:37.500 --> 00:01:39.000 + +Thank you. Britain's newest wasp farm… + +00:01:39.000 --> 00:01:42.000 + +This second theory which was the one that I had said… + +00:01:42.000 --> 00:01:46.000 +[action] The phone rings; Presenter answers. + +00:01:46.000 --> 00:01:48.000 + +Yes, no I'm trying… + +00:01:48.000 --> 00:01:53.000 + +Which I could expound without doubt. This second theory which, with the one which I have said, forms the brace of theories which I own and which belongs to me, goes like this… + +00:01:53.000 --> 00:01:58.000 + +(looking at his shoe) nine and a half, wide fitting…Balleys of Bond Street. What? No, sort of brogue. + +00:01:58.000 --> 00:02:00.000 + +This is what it is. (clears throat) + +00:02:00.000 --> 00:02:01.500 + +Eight and a half. + +00:02:01.500 --> 00:02:04.000 + +This is it… (lots of noisy throat clearing) + +00:02:04.000 --> 00:02:10.000 +[action] Presenter rises and leaves set to travel agent set next door. + +00:02:10.000 --> 00:02:14.000 + +Hello, yes,,,yes,,, + +00:02:14.000 --> 00:02:28.000 +[action] Presenter enters travel set; Tourist still droning; Bounder on phone. + +00:02:28.000 --> 00:02:30.000 + +…and the Spanish Tourist Board promises you that the raging cholera epidemic is merely a case of mild Spanish tummy… + +00:02:30.000 --> 00:02:33.000 + +The fire brigade are here. They're coming. + +00:02:33.000 --> 00:02:36.000 + +Hello! No, no, no I think they are all part of the British Shoe Corporation now. + +00:02:36.000 --> 00:02:42.000 +[action] Miss Elk follows presenter in. Fire brigade enter; secretary greets them; checks shoe size by removing shoe. + +00:02:42.000 --> 00:02:46.000 + +Chris, this other theory of mine which is mine like the other one I also own. The second theory… + +00:02:46.000 --> 00:02:50.000 + +My second theory states that fire brigade choirs seldom sing songs about Marcel Proust. + +00:02:50.000 --> 00:03:00.000 +[action] With half-beat pause the fire brigade start singing the Proust song; after usual number of lines we hear the gong. + +00:03:00.000 --> 00:03:02.000 + +Start again. + +00:03:02.000 --> 00:03:06.000 +[action] Loony looks into scene on overlay and waves at camera as we fade to black. Hold black; loony leans into black and waves again before fading away. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_32_-_Episode_Thirty-two/0_Episode32_head_tail.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_32_-_Episode_Thirty-two/0_Episode32_head_tail.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..bbab9845 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_32_-_Episode_Thirty-two/0_Episode32_head_tail.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,28 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Intro titles and end credits extracted from page head/titles and markers. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:05.000 +[action] Newsreel footage. + +00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:09.000 + +And now… + +00:00:09.000 --> 00:00:11.500 + +It's… + +00:00:11.500 --> 00:00:16.000 +[action] Animated titles. + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:19.000 + +Monty Python's Flying Circus. + +00:14:30.000 --> 00:14:33.000 +[caption] THE END + +00:14:33.000 --> 00:14:50.000 +[action] CREDITS + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_32_-_Episode_Thirty-two/1_Tory_Housewives_Clean-up_Campaign.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_32_-_Episode_Thirty-two/1_Tory_Housewives_Clean-up_Campaign.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..e3a28d09 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_32_-_Episode_Thirty-two/1_Tory_Housewives_Clean-up_Campaign.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,71 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Segment begins at anchor #1. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:03.500 +[action] Newsreel footage. + +00:00:03.500 --> 00:00:25.000 + +[newsreel voice] In the modern Britain, united under a great leader, it's the housewives of Britain who are getting things moving. [action] Red Devils flying; picture of Edward Heath. Here a coachload of lovely ladies are on their way to speed up production in a car factory. [action] Coach load of pepperpots, middle class, grey hair, Mary Whitehouse glasses; the coach says 'Tory Tours'. And here we are boys, it's the no-hurry brigade hanging about for endless overtime. And just watch these gallant girls go into action… [action] Factory yard; workers eating sandwiches; clock says 1:15; coach swings in undercrank; ladies pour out to belt men with umbrellas/handbags; men flee back into factories. + +00:00:25.000 --> 00:00:37.000 + +Not working fast enough? Well, there's an answer for that. [action] A man at a machine, producing something incredibly fast; a pepperpot holds an enormous sledgehammer. Yes, this is certainly the way to speed up production. [action] Wide shot of factory interior; three pepperpots on a gantry wearing 'P.P.' armbands and dark Mary Whitehouse glasses. + +00:00:37.000 --> 00:00:52.000 + +This is the recipe for increased productivity to meet the threat of those nasty foreigners when Britain takes her natural place at the head of the British Common Market. [action] Strikers picketing with slogans: 'Fair Pay', 'Less Profits', 'Parity', 'No Victimization'. And how's this for a way to beat strikers. [action] Pepperpots arrive, clinging to side of old Buick; they race in and start beating the strikers with the banners. + +00:00:52.000 --> 00:01:13.000 + +Those spotty continental boys will soon have to look out for Mrs Britain, and talking of windmills, these girls aren't afraid to tilt at the permissive society, [action] art gallery exterior; pepperpots run in with bundles and ladders. Business is booming in the so-called arts, but two can play at that game, chum. [action] Art gallery interior pan: paintings 'cleaned up'—trousers and cardigans added to nudes, Bermuda shorts on David, shorts on tubular structure, attendant in shorts too. And it's not just the modern so-called plastic arts that get the clean-up treatment. + +00:01:13.000 --> 00:01:17.000 +[action] Theatre stage. Desdemona on a bed. Othello with her. + +00:01:17.000 --> 00:01:20.000 + +Oh Desdemona, Desdemona. + +00:01:20.000 --> 00:01:24.000 +[action] Pepperpots race on to the stage and pull him off. + +00:01:24.000 --> 00:01:49.000 + +And those continentals had better watch out for their dirty foreign literature. Jean-Paul Sartre and Jean Genet won't know what's hit them. Never mind the foulness of their language - come '73 they'll all have to write in British. [action] Pepperpots burning books: 'Bertrand Russell', 'Das Kapital', 'Guardian', 'Sartre', 'Freud'. You can keep your fastidious continental bidets Mrs Foreigner - Mrs Britain knows how to keep her feet clean … but she'll baffle like bingo boys when it comes to keeping the television screen clean… + +00:01:49.000 --> 00:02:05.000 +[action] BBC TV Centre. Pepperpots parade with signs: 'Clean TV Centre', 'God Says No To Filth', 'To The Cells'. Another pepperpot holds 'Wanted Dead Or Alive' with photo of Robert Robinson. + +00:02:05.000 --> 00:02:24.000 + +Better watch out for those nasty continental shows on the sneaky second channel. [action] Armed pepperpots escorting people out of TV Centre. But apart from attacking that prurient hot-bed of left-wing continentalism at Shepherds Bush, what else do these ordinary mums think? Do they accept Hegelianism? + +00:02:24.000 --> 00:02:27.000 + +No!.. + +00:02:27.000 --> 00:02:33.000 + +Do they prefer Leibnitz to Wittgenstein? + +00:02:33.000 --> 00:02:36.000 + +No! No! + +00:02:36.000 --> 00:02:42.000 + +And where do they stand on young people? + +00:02:42.000 --> 00:02:48.000 + +Just here, dear. [action] Pepperpot standing on long-haired youth's head. + +00:02:48.000 --> 00:03:05.000 + +And their power is growing daily and when these girls roll their sleeves up its arms all the way. [action] Pepperpots on the turret of an armoured vehicle; four pepperpots on motor bikes flank it. Yes, this is the way to fight the constant war against pornography. + +00:03:05.000 --> 00:03:18.000 +[action] Machine guns chatter. Two pepperpots in a trench firing. Mortar bombs, reloading and firing. Bombs and smoke. Nude organist sits among explosions and plays chords. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_32_-_Episode_Thirty-two/2_Gumby_brain_specialist.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_32_-_Episode_Thirty-two/2_Gumby_brain_specialist.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..763b7d84 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_32_-_Episode_Thirty-two/2_Gumby_brain_specialist.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,119 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Segment begins at anchor #2. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:08.000 +[action] Close up 'Harley Street'. Stirring music. Mix to plush consulting room. Knocking; T.F. Gumby enters backwards. + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:22.000 + +Doctor! Doctor! DOCTOR! [action] Bangs bell violently; smashes intercom; breaks desk up. Doctor! Doctor! DOCTOR! DOCTOR! Doctor! Doctor! Where is the Doctor? + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:26.000 +[action] Another door opens and another Gumby appears. + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:28.500 + +Hello! + +00:00:28.500 --> 00:00:31.500 + +Are you the brain specialist? + +00:00:31.500 --> 00:00:33.500 + +Hello! + +00:00:33.500 --> 00:00:36.500 + +Are you the brain specialist? + +00:00:36.500 --> 00:00:42.000 + +No, no, I am not the brain specialist. No, no, I am not… Yes. Yes I am. + +00:00:42.000 --> 00:00:44.500 + +My brain hurts! + +00:00:44.500 --> 00:00:48.500 + +Well let's take a look at it, Mr Gumby. + +00:00:48.500 --> 00:00:51.500 +[action] Specialist starts to pull up Gumby's sweater. + +00:00:51.500 --> 00:00:56.500 + +No, no, no, my brain in my head. [action] Specialist thumps him on the head. + +00:00:56.500 --> 00:00:58.500 + +It will have to come out. + +00:00:58.500 --> 00:01:01.500 + +Out? Of my head? + +00:01:01.500 --> 00:01:10.000 + +Yes! All the bits of it. Nurse! Nurse! [action] A nurse enters. NURSE! NURSE! Nurse, take Mr Gumby to a brain surgeon. + +00:01:10.000 --> 00:01:12.000 + +Yes doctor… + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:16.000 +[action] She leads Gumby out. Specialist grunting and shouting in background. + +00:01:16.000 --> 00:01:18.500 + +Where's the 'Lancet'? + +00:01:18.500 --> 00:01:22.000 + +[aside to T.F. Gumby] He's brilliant you know. + +00:01:22.000 --> 00:01:26.000 + +Where's the bloody 'Lancet'? My brain hurts too. + +00:01:26.000 --> 00:01:31.000 +[action] Ambulance racing. 'Dr Kildare' theme. Cut to operating theatre. Surgeon is not a Gumby. + +00:01:31.000 --> 00:01:39.000 + +[putting on Gumby props] Gloves … glasses… moustache… handkerchief… [Gumby voice] I'm going to operate!! + +00:01:39.000 --> 00:01:43.000 +[action] He is surrounded by Gumbys. T. F. Gumby on operating table. + +00:01:43.000 --> 00:01:45.500 + +Let's operate. + +00:01:45.500 --> 00:01:49.500 +[action] They begin to use woodworking implements on T. F. Gumby. + +00:01:49.500 --> 00:01:51.500 + +Hello! + +00:01:51.500 --> 00:01:54.000 + +Ooh! We forgot the anaesthetic! + +00:01:54.000 --> 00:01:56.500 + +The anaesthetic! The anaesthetic! + +00:01:56.500 --> 00:02:02.000 +[action] A Gumby anaesthetist crashes through wall with two gas cylinders. + +00:02:02.000 --> 00:02:05.000 + +I've come to anaesthetize you!! + +00:02:05.000 --> 00:02:10.000 +[action] Raises a gas cylinder and strikes Gumby hard on head. Bong. Blackness. Into the oblivion of animation. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_32_-_Episode_Thirty-two/3_Molluscs_-_'live'_TV_documentary.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_32_-_Episode_Thirty-two/3_Molluscs_-_'live'_TV_documentary.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..5acc9220 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_32_-_Episode_Thirty-two/3_Molluscs_-_'live'_TV_documentary.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,247 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Segment begins at anchor #3. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.500 + +The 'Nine O'Clock News' which was to follow has been cancelled tonight so we can bring you the quarter finals of the All Essex Badminton Championship. Your commentator as usual is Edna O'Brien. + +00:00:06.500 --> 00:00:13.000 + +[Irish accent] Hullo fans. Begorra an' to be sure there's some fine badminton down there in Essex this afternoon. We really… + +00:00:13.000 --> 00:00:18.000 +[action] Mr Jalin smashes the TV with a ball and chain. Doorbell rings. Mrs Jalin exits and returns. + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:19.500 + +George. + +00:00:19.500 --> 00:00:21.500 + +Yes, Gladys. + +00:00:21.500 --> 00:00:24.500 + +There's a man at the door with a moustache. + +00:00:24.500 --> 00:00:30.000 + +Tell him I've already got one. [action] She hits him hard with a newspaper. All right, all right. What's he want then? + +00:00:30.000 --> 00:00:33.000 + +He says do we want a documentary on molluscs. + +00:00:33.000 --> 00:00:34.500 + +Molluscs?! + +00:00:34.500 --> 00:00:36.000 + +Yes. + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:38.500 + +What's he mean, molluscs? + +00:00:38.500 --> 00:00:43.000 + +MOLLUSCS!! GASTROPODS! LAMELLIBRANCHS! CEPHALOPODS! + +00:00:43.000 --> 00:00:47.000 + +Oh molluscs, I thought you said bacon. [action] She hits him again. All right, all right. What's he charge then? + +00:00:47.000 --> 00:00:48.500 + +It's free. + +00:00:48.500 --> 00:00:51.000 + +Ooh! Where does he want us to sit? + +00:00:51.000 --> 00:00:53.500 + +[calling through the door] He says yes. + +00:00:53.500 --> 00:00:57.000 +[action] Mr Zorba enters with plywood TV frame; stands behind and begins. + +00:00:57.000 --> 00:01:12.000 + +Good evening. Tonight molluscs. The mollusc is a soft-bodied, unsegmented invertebrate animal usually protected by a large shell. One of the most numerous groups of invertebrates, it is exceeded in number of species only by the arthropods … viz. [action] Holds up a lobster. + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:14.500 + +Not very interesting is it? + +00:01:14.500 --> 00:01:16.000 + +What? + +00:01:16.000 --> 00:01:18.500 + +I was talking to him. + +00:01:18.500 --> 00:01:29.500 + +Oh. Anyway, the typical mollusc, viz, a snail [action] holds one up consists of a prominent muscular portion… the head-foot… a visceral mass and a shell which is secreted by the free edge of the mantle. + +00:01:29.500 --> 00:01:31.500 + +Dreadful isn't it? + +00:01:31.500 --> 00:01:33.000 + +What? + +00:01:33.000 --> 00:01:35.000 + +I was talking to him. + +00:01:35.000 --> 00:01:42.500 + +Oh. Well anyway… in some molluscs, however, viz, slugs, [action] holds one up the shell is absent or rudimentary… + +00:01:42.500 --> 00:01:44.500 + +Switch him off. + +00:01:44.500 --> 00:01:47.500 +[action] Mrs Jalin looks for a switch, unsuccessfully. + +00:01:47.500 --> 00:01:57.000 + +Whereas in others, viz, cephalopods the head-foot is greatly modified and forms tentacles, viz, the squid. [looks out] What are you doing? + +00:01:57.000 --> 00:01:59.500 + +Switching you off. + +00:01:59.500 --> 00:02:02.500 + +Why, don't you like it? + +00:02:02.500 --> 00:02:04.500 + +Oh it's dreadful. + +00:02:04.500 --> 00:02:06.500 + +Embarrassing. + +00:02:06.500 --> 00:02:08.500 + +Is it? + +00:02:08.500 --> 00:02:11.000 + +Yes, it's perfectly awful. + +00:02:11.000 --> 00:02:14.000 + +Disgraceful! I don't know how they've got the nerve to put it on. + +00:02:14.000 --> 00:02:18.500 + +It's so boring. + +00:02:18.500 --> 00:02:22.000 + +Well … it's not much of a subject is it… be fair. + +00:02:22.000 --> 00:02:24.000 + +What do you think, George? + +00:02:24.000 --> 00:02:26.500 + +Give him another twenty seconds. + +00:02:26.500 --> 00:02:32.500 + +Anyway the majority of the molluscs are included in three large groups, the gastropods, the lamellibranchs and the cephalopods… + +00:02:32.500 --> 00:02:35.000 + +We knew that. + +00:02:35.000 --> 00:02:39.000 + +However, what is more interesting, er … is the molluscs's er … sex life. + +00:02:39.000 --> 00:02:40.500 + +Oh! + +00:02:40.500 --> 00:02:47.000 + +Yes, the mollusc is a randy little fellow whose primitive brain scarcely strays from the subject of the you know what. + +00:02:47.000 --> 00:02:49.500 +[action] Goes back to sofa] Disgusting! + +00:02:49.500 --> 00:02:51.500 + +Ought not to be allowed. + +00:02:51.500 --> 00:03:03.000 + +The randiest of the gastropods is the limpet. This hot-blooded little beast with its tent-like shell is always on the job. Its extra-marital activities are something startling. Frankly I don't know how the female limpet finds the time to adhere to the rock-face. How am I doing? + +00:03:03.000 --> 00:03:04.500 + +Disgusting. + +00:03:04.500 --> 00:03:06.500 + +But more interesting. + +00:03:06.500 --> 00:03:08.000 + +Oh yes, tch, tch, tch. + +00:03:08.000 --> 00:03:16.000 + +Another loose-living gastropod is the periwinkle. This shameless little libertine with its characteristic ventral locomotion … is not the marrying kind: 'Anywhere anytime' is its motto. Up with the shell and they're at it. + +00:03:16.000 --> 00:03:18.500 + +How about the lamellibranchs? + +00:03:18.500 --> 00:03:36.000 + +I'm coming to them … the great scallop [action] holds one up … this tatty, scrofulous old rapist, is second in depravity only to the common clam. [action] Holds up a clam. This latter is a right whore, a harlot, a trollop, a cynical bed-hopping firm-breasted Rabelaisian bit of sea food that makes Fanny Hill look like a dead Pope… and finally among the lamellibranch bivalves, that most depraved of the whole sub-species - the whelk. The whelk is nothing but a homosexual of the worst kind. This gay boy of the gastropods, this queer crustacean, this mincing mollusc, this screaming, prancing, limp-wristed queen of the deep makes me sick. + +00:03:36.000 --> 00:03:37.500 + +Have you got one? + +00:03:37.500 --> 00:03:39.000 + +Here! [action] Holds one up. + +00:03:39.000 --> 00:03:41.000 + +Let's kill it. Disgusting. + +00:03:41.000 --> 00:03:44.000 +[action] Zorba throws it on the floor; Mr and Mrs Jalin stamp on it. + +00:03:44.000 --> 00:03:48.000 + +That'll teach it. Well thank you for a very interesting programme. + +00:03:48.000 --> 00:03:50.000 + +Oh, not at all. Thank you. + +00:03:50.000 --> 00:03:52.000 + +Yes, that was very nice. + +00:03:52.000 --> 00:03:54.000 + +Thank you. [action] He shakes hands with her. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_32_-_Episode_Thirty-two/4_The_Minister_for_not_listening_to_people.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_32_-_Episode_Thirty-two/4_The_Minister_for_not_listening_to_people.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..b69ed5aa --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_32_-_Episode_Thirty-two/4_The_Minister_for_not_listening_to_people.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,8 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Segment begins at anchor #4. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:01:05.000 + +The Minister for not listening to people toured Batley today to investigate allegations of victimization in home-loan improvement grants, made last week [caption] photo changes to the Shadow Minister for judging people at first sight to be marginally worse than they actually are. [caption] Photo changes to exterior of the Home Office. At the Home Office, the Minister for inserting himself in between chairs and walls in men's clubs, was at his desk after a short illness. He spent the morning dealing with the Irish situation and later in the day had long discussions with the Minister for running upstairs two at a time, flinging the door open and saying 'Ha, ha! Caught you, Mildred'. [caption] Houses of Parliament. In the Commons there was another day of heated debate on the third reading of the Trade Practices Bill. Mr Roland Penrose, the Under-Secretary for making deep growling noises grrr, launched a bitter personal attack on the ex-Minister for delving deep into a black satin bag and producing a tube of Euthymol toothpaste. Later in the debate the Junior Minister for being frightened by any kind of farm machinery, challenged the Under-Secretary of State for hiding from Terence Rattigan to produce the current year's trading figures, as supplied by the Department of stealing packets of bandages from the self-service counter at Timothy Whites and selling them again at a considerable profit. Parliament rose at 11:30, and, crawling along a dark passageway into the old rectory [action] camera tracks into newsreader's face filling the screen] broke down the door to the serving hatch, painted the spare room and next weekend I think they'll be able to make a start on the boy's bedroom, while Amy and Roger, up in London for a few days, go to see the mysterious Mr Grenville. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_32_-_Episode_Thirty-two/5_Tuesday_documentary_children's_story_party_political_broadcast.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_32_-_Episode_Thirty-two/5_Tuesday_documentary_children's_story_party_political_broadcast.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..f035209b --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_32_-_Episode_Thirty-two/5_Tuesday_documentary_children's_story_party_political_broadcast.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,69 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Segment begins at anchor #5 and includes format-hopping gags. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[caption] TODAY IN PARLIAMENT HAS NOW BECOME THE CLASSIC SERIAL + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:17.000 + +He in turn has been revealed by D'Arcy as something less than an honest man. Sybil feels once again a resurgence of her old affection and she and Balreau return to her little house in Clermont-Ferrand, the kind of two-up, two-down house that most French workers throughout the European Community are living in today. + +00:00:17.000 --> 00:00:21.000 +[caption] THE CLASSIC SERIAL HAS NOW BECOME THE TUESDAY DOCUMENTARY + +00:00:21.000 --> 00:00:35.000 + +[action] Photo of French construction site; camera tracks over photo then reveals documentary set backdrop. The ease of construction, using on-site prefabrication facilities makes cheap housing a reality. The walls of these houses are lined with prestressed asbestos which keeps the house warm and snuggly and ever so safe from the big bad rabbit, who can scratch and scratch for all he's worth, but he just can't get into Porky's house. + +00:00:35.000 --> 00:00:39.000 +[caption] THE TUESDAY DOCUMENTARY HAS BECOME "CHILDREN'S STORY" + +00:00:39.000 --> 00:00:54.000 + +Where is Porky? Here he is. What a funny little chap. [action] Animated Porky does little dance. But Porky's one of the lucky ones - he survived the urban upheaval of the thirties and forties. For him, Jarrow is still just a memory. [action] Zoom out to Porky as part of documentary-type graph. The hunger marches, the East End riots, the collapse of the Labour Government in 1931… [action] Stock film of Ramsay MacDonald. + +00:00:54.000 --> 00:00:57.000 +[caption] THE CHILDREN'S STORY HAS GONE BACK INTO THE TUESDAY DOCUMENTARY + +00:00:57.000 --> 00:01:10.000 + +… are dim reminders of the days before a new-found affluence swept the land, [action] stock shots of Regent Street lights, shopping crowds, tills, consumer goods ending with toys] making it clean and tidy and making all the shops full of nice things, lovely choo-choo trains … + +00:01:10.000 --> 00:01:12.500 +[caption] NO IT HASN'T + +00:01:12.500 --> 00:01:25.000 + +… and toys and shiny cars that go brrm, brrm, brrm, [action] shots of toys] and everybody was happy and singing all the day long [action] Presenter closes a big kiddies' book] and nobody saw the big bad rabbit ever again. + +00:01:25.000 --> 00:01:31.000 +[action] Cut to a politician in a badly lit party political broadcast set. + +00:01:31.000 --> 00:01:36.000 + +But you know it's always very easy to blame the big bad rabbit… + +00:01:36.000 --> 00:01:38.500 +[caption] NOW IT'S BECOME A PARTY POLITICAL BROADCAST! + +00:01:38.500 --> 00:01:45.000 + +…when by-elections are going against the Government, [action] turns; side camera reveals a cross as for religious broadcast] Do you think we should really be blaming ourselves? + +00:01:45.000 --> 00:01:48.000 +[caption] NO, SORRY, 'RELIGION TODAY' + +00:01:48.000 --> 00:01:51.000 + +Because you know, that's where we really ought to start looking. + +00:01:51.000 --> 00:01:54.000 +[action] A football comes in; he heads it neatly out of shot. + +00:01:54.000 --> 00:01:56.000 +[caption] MATCH OF THE DAY + +00:01:56.000 --> 00:02:02.000 +[action] Stock film: ball into net, Wembley crowd roaring. Slow-motion sequence of footballers kissing each other. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_32_-_Episode_Thirty-two/6_Apology_(politicians).vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_32_-_Episode_Thirty-two/6_Apology_(politicians).vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..9d155ddf --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_32_-_Episode_Thirty-two/6_Apology_(politicians).vtt @@ -0,0 +1,10 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Segment begins at anchor #6; roller caption read as VO. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:01:00.000 +[caption/voice over] WE WOULD LIKE TO APOLOGIZE FOR THE WAY IN WHICH POLITICIANS ARE REPRESENTED IN THIS PROGRAMME. IT WAS NEVER OUR INTENTION TO IMPLY THAT POLITICIANS ARE WEAK-KNEED, POLITICAL TIME-SERVERS WHO ARE CONCERNED MORE WITH THEIR PERSONAL VENDETTAS AND PRIVATE POWER STRUGGLES THAN THE PROBLEMS OF GOVERNMENT, NOR TO SUGGEST AT ANY POINT THAT THEY SACRIFICE THEIR CREDIBILITY BY DENYING FREE DEBATE ON VITAL MATTERS IN THE MISTAKEN IMPRESSION THAT PARTY UNITY COMES BEFORE THE WELL-BEING OF THE PEOPLE THEY SUPPOSEDLY REPRESENT NOR TO IMPLY AT ANY STAGE THAT THEY ARE SQUABBLING LITTLE TOADIES WITHOUT AN OUNCE OF CONCERN FOR THE VITAL SOCIAL PROBLEMS OF TODAY. NOR INDEED DO WE INTEND THAT VIEWERS SHOULD CONSIDER THEM AS CRABBY ULCEROUS LITTLE SELF-SEEKING VERMIN WITH FURRY LEGS AND AN EXCESSIVE ADDICTION TO ALCOHOL AND CERTAIN EXPLICIT SEXUAL PRACTICES WHICH SOME PEOPLE MIGHT FIND OFFENSIVE. + +00:01:00.000 --> 00:01:05.000 +[caption/voice over] WE ARE SORRY IF THIS IMPRESSION HAS COME ACROSS. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_32_-_Episode_Thirty-two/7_Expedition_to_Lake_Pahoe.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_32_-_Episode_Thirty-two/7_Expedition_to_Lake_Pahoe.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..5c5fedc8 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_32_-_Episode_Thirty-two/7_Expedition_to_Lake_Pahoe.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,290 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Segment begins at anchor #7. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:07.000 +[action] Expedition preparations in landscape: loading equipment into land-rovers. Interviewer walks into shot. + +00:00:07.000 --> 00:00:18.000 + +Hello. All the activity you can see in progress here is part of the intricate… aah! [action] Steps into a man-trap, continues] preparations for the British Naval Expedition to Lake Pahoe. The leader of the expedition is Sir Jane Russell. [action] Now seen with admiral; interviewer has wooden leg and crutch] Sir Jane, what is the purpose of your expedition? + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:24.000 + +Well this is a completely uncharted lake with like hitherto unclassified marine life man, so the whole scene's wide open for a scientific exploration. + +00:00:24.000 --> 00:00:33.000 + +[now with a parrot on his shoulder] One can see the immense amount of preparation involved. Have there been many difficulties in setting up this venture? + +00:00:33.000 --> 00:00:42.000 + +[with 'naval-lib' badge] Well the real hang-up was with the bread man but when the top brass pigs came through we got it together in a couple of moons. Commodore Betty Grable, who's a real sub-aqua head, has got it together diving wise and like the whole gig's been a real gas man. + +00:00:42.000 --> 00:00:47.000 + +[now with Long John Silver hat and eyepatch] Thank you. Lieutenant Commander Dorothy Lamour. + +00:00:47.000 --> 00:00:49.000 + +Pieces of eight. + +00:00:49.000 --> 00:00:55.000 + +[now with Long John Silver jacket] Dorothy you're in charge of security and liaison for this operation. + +00:00:55.000 --> 00:00:57.500 + +Right on. [action] He is smoking something; really cool. + +00:00:57.500 --> 00:01:02.000 + +You've kept this all rather hush-hush so far shipmate. + +00:01:02.000 --> 00:01:07.000 + +Yeah, it's been really heavy man with all these freaks from the fascist press trying to blow the whole scene. + +00:01:07.000 --> 00:01:22.000 + +[to camera, piratey] There's no doubt about it, this expedition does have some rather unusual aspects, Jim lad. For a first, why does the senior personnel all bear the names of Hollywood film stars of the forties … and female ones at that, shiver me timbers 'tis the black spot, and secondly, I be not afraid of thee Blind Pew … why do they talk this rather strange stilted, underground jargon, belay the mainbrace Squire Trelawney this be my ship now. [action] He is hit by a dart.] Argh! A tranquillizing dart fired by the cowardly BBC health department dogs … they've done filled me full of chlorpromazine damn! + +00:01:22.000 --> 00:01:24.000 +[action] He falls. A second interviewer catches the microphone. + +00:01:24.000 --> 00:01:31.000 + +I'm sorry about my colleague's rather unconventional behaviour. + +00:01:31.000 --> 00:01:36.000 + +[running toward camera] The navy's out of sight man come together with the RN it's really something other than else. + +00:01:36.000 --> 00:01:40.000 +[action] Animated psychedelic advert for the Royal Navy. + +00:01:40.000 --> 00:01:42.000 + +You dig it, man? + +00:01:42.000 --> 00:02:10.000 + +Hello. I'm sorry about my colleague's rather unconventional behaviour just now, but things haven't been too easy for him recently, trouble at home, rather confidential so I can't give you all the details… interesting though they are… three bottles of rum with his Weetabix, and so on, anyway… apparently the girl wasn't even … anyway the activity you see behind me… it's the mother I feel sorry for. I'll start again. The activity you see behind me is part of the preparations for the new Naval Expedition to Lake Pahoe. The man in charge of this expedition is Vice Admiral Sir John Cunningham. Sir John, hello there. + +00:02:10.000 --> 00:02:36.000 + +Ah, hello. Well first of all I'd like to apologize for the behaviour of certain of my colleagues you may have seen earlier, but they are from broken homes, circus families and so on and they are in no way representative of the new modern improved British Navy. They are a small vociferous minority; and may I take this opportunity of emphasizing that there is no cannibalism in the British Navy. Absolutely none, and when I say none, I mean there is a certain amount, more than we are prepared to admit, but all new ratings are warned that if they wake up in the morning and find any toothmarks at all anywhere on their bodies, they're to tell me immediately so that I can immediately take every measure to hush the whole thing up. And, finally, necrophilia is right out. [action] Interviewer nods, embarrassed. Now, this expedition is primarily to investigate reports of cannibalism and necrophilia in… this expedition is primarily to investigate reports of unusual marine life in the as yet uncharted Lake Pahoe. + +00:02:36.000 --> 00:02:39.000 + +And where exactly is the lake? + +00:02:39.000 --> 00:02:43.000 + +Er 22A, Runcorn Avenue, I think. Yes, that's right, 22A. + +00:02:43.000 --> 00:02:44.500 + +Runcorn Avenue? + +00:02:44.500 --> 00:02:48.000 + +Yes, it's just by Blenheim Crescent… do you know it? + +00:02:48.000 --> 00:02:51.000 + +You mean it's in an ordinary street? + +00:02:51.000 --> 00:02:55.000 + +Of course it's not an ordinary street! It's got a lake in it! + +00:02:55.000 --> 00:02:57.000 + +Yes but I… + +00:02:57.000 --> 00:03:01.500 + +Look, how many streets do you know that have got lakes in them? + +00:03:01.500 --> 00:03:05.000 + +But you mean… is it very large? + +00:03:05.000 --> 00:03:10.000 + +Of course it's not large, you couldn't get a large lake in Runcorn Avenue! You'd have to knock down the tobacconist's! [looks off] Jenkins … no! + +00:03:10.000 --> 00:03:14.000 +[action] A rating about to bite a human leg; Sir John blocks lens. Cut to Runcorn Avenue; land-rover arrives. + +00:03:14.000 --> 00:03:19.000 + +I'm now standing in Runcorn Avenue. Sir John … where exactly is the lake? + +00:03:19.000 --> 00:03:22.000 + +Er, well let's see, that's 18… that's 20 so this must be the one. + +00:03:22.000 --> 00:03:23.500 + +Er, excuse me… + +00:03:23.500 --> 00:03:25.500 + +Yes, that's the one all right. + +00:03:25.500 --> 00:03:28.000 + +But it's an ordinary house. + +00:03:28.000 --> 00:03:31.000 + +Look, I'm getting pretty irritated with this line of questioning. + +00:03:31.000 --> 00:03:34.000 + +But it doesn't even look like a lake… + +00:03:34.000 --> 00:03:39.000 + +Look, your whole approach since this interview started has been to mock the Navy. When I think that it was for the likes of you that I had both my legs blown off… + +00:03:39.000 --> 00:03:41.000 + +[pointing at perfectly healthy legs] You haven't had both your legs blown off! + +00:03:41.000 --> 00:03:46.000 + +I was talking metaphorically you fool. Jenkins - put that down. [action] Jenkins returns the leg to the land-rover. Right, is the equipment ready? + +00:03:46.000 --> 00:03:49.000 + +Diving equipment all ready man. [action] Gives hippy salute. + +00:03:49.000 --> 00:03:58.000 + +[warning finger] Right. Now quite simply the approach to Lake Pahoe is up the steps, and then we come to the shores of the lake. Now, I'm going to press the bell just to see if there's anyone in. + +00:03:58.000 --> 00:04:00.500 + +[answering] Hello? + +00:04:00.500 --> 00:04:03.000 + +Good morning - I'm looking for a Lake Pahoe. + +00:04:03.000 --> 00:04:05.500 + +There's a Mr Padgett. + +00:04:05.500 --> 00:04:07.000 + +No, no a lake. + +00:04:07.000 --> 00:04:11.000 + +There's no lake here, mate. This is Runcorn Avenue. What's the camera doing? + +00:04:11.000 --> 00:04:15.000 + +[coming out] Camera? What's he want? Oooh, are we on the telly? [action] Grins at the camera. + +00:04:15.000 --> 00:04:17.000 + +He's looking for a lake. + +00:04:17.000 --> 00:04:18.500 + +Lake Pahoe. + +00:04:18.500 --> 00:04:22.000 + +Oh, you want downstairs, 22A the basement. + +00:04:22.000 --> 00:04:25.000 + +Ah! Thank you very much. Good morning. Come on men, downstairs. + +00:04:25.000 --> 00:04:27.000 +[action] They walk to the basement. Interviewer intercepts. + +00:04:27.000 --> 00:04:29.000 + +Were you successful, Sir John? + +00:04:29.000 --> 00:04:30.500 + +It's in the basement. + +00:04:30.500 --> 00:04:32.000 + +In the basement? + +00:04:32.000 --> 00:04:34.000 +[action] He sees a parrot on his shoulder. + +00:04:34.000 --> 00:04:35.500 + +Pieces of eight. + +00:04:35.500 --> 00:04:38.000 +Eugh! [action] Knocks it off. + +00:04:38.000 --> 00:04:46.000 +[action] Sir John rings 22A; looks through window. Middle-aged couple sit in a room filled with water, wearing breathing apparatus. Man reads paper; woman knits. Sir John knocks; woman looks up. + +00:04:46.000 --> 00:04:47.500 + +Hello. + +00:04:47.500 --> 00:04:50.000 + +Ooooh. I think it's someone about the damp. + +00:04:50.000 --> 00:04:51.500 + +Hello. + +00:04:51.500 --> 00:04:54.000 + +Tell 'em about the bleeding rats, too. + +00:04:54.000 --> 00:04:58.000 + +I'll go. [action] She swims to window and shouts out] Yes? + +00:04:58.000 --> 00:05:01.000 + +Good morning, is this Lake Pahoe? + +00:05:01.000 --> 00:05:05.000 + +Well, I don't know about that, but it's bleeding damp. Are you from the council? + +00:05:05.000 --> 00:05:08.000 + +No. We are the official British Naval Expedition to this lake. May we come in? + +00:05:08.000 --> 00:05:09.500 + +Hang on. + +00:05:09.500 --> 00:05:18.000 +[action] She submerges; picks up a big sign for the man: 'It's not the council, it's a British Naval Expedition to Lake Pahoe or something and can they come in'. Enormous shark looks over his shoulder from a cupboard; the man sees it and hits it with a newspaper. + +00:05:18.000 --> 00:05:19.500 + +Bloody sharks. + +00:05:19.500 --> 00:05:21.000 + +Get in. + +00:05:21.000 --> 00:05:25.000 +[action] He holds up a sign reading 'Tell them to go away'. Woman swims to window and gives a V-sign to Sir John. + +00:05:25.000 --> 00:05:30.000 + +Well um… that would appear to be the end of the expedition. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_32_-_Episode_Thirty-two/8_The_silliest_interview_we've_ever_had.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_32_-_Episode_Thirty-two/8_The_silliest_interview_we've_ever_had.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..ee11ae63 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_32_-_Episode_Thirty-two/8_The_silliest_interview_we've_ever_had.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,27 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Segment begins at anchor #8. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:12.000 + +The Magna Carta - was it a document signed at Runnymede in 1215 by King John pledging independence to the English barons, or was it a piece of chewing gum on a bedspread in Dorset? The latter idea is the brainchild of a man new to the field of historical research. Mr Badger, why - why are you on this programme? + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:16.000 +[action] Pull back to show Mr Badger wearing a flat cap; Scots accent. + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:22.000 + +Well, I think I can answer this question most successfully in mime. [action] Mimes incomprehensibly. + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:24.500 + +But why Dorset? + +00:00:24.500 --> 00:00:31.000 + +Well, I have for a long time been suffering from a species of brain injury which I incurred during the rigours of childbirth, and I'd like to conclude by putting my finger up my nose. + +00:00:31.000 --> 00:00:37.000 + +Mr Badger, I think you're the silliest person we've ever had on this programme, and so I'm going to ask you to have dinner with me. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_32_-_Episode_Thirty-two/9_The_silliest_sketch_we've_ever_done.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_32_-_Episode_Thirty-two/9_The_silliest_sketch_we've_ever_done.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..6481a131 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_32_-_Episode_Thirty-two/9_The_silliest_sketch_we've_ever_done.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,76 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Segment begins at anchor #9 and runs through end caption. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:03.000 +[caption] LATER THE SAME SKETCH + +00:00:03.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] They sit at a restaurant table. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:24.000 + +My wife Maureen ran off with a bottle of Bell's whisky during the Aberdeen versus Raith Rovers match which ended in a goalless draw. Robson particularly, in goal, had a magnificent first half, his fine positional sense preventing the build-up of any severe pressure on the suspect Aberdeen defense. McLoughlan missed an easy chance to clinch the game towards the final whistle but Raith must be well satisfied with their point. + +00:00:24.000 --> 00:00:28.000 + +Do please go on. This is the least fascinating conversation I've ever had. + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:30.500 +[action] A waiter enters. + +00:00:30.500 --> 00:00:33.000 + +Would you like to order sir? + +00:00:33.000 --> 00:00:36.000 + +Yes, Mr Badger, what would you like to start with? + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:38.000 + +Er, I'll have a whisky to start with. + +00:00:38.000 --> 00:00:40.000 + +For first course, sir? + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:41.500 + +Aye. + +00:00:41.500 --> 00:00:43.500 + +And for main course, sir? + +00:00:43.500 --> 00:00:47.000 + +I'll have a whisky for main course and I'll follow that with a whisky for pudding. + +00:00:47.000 --> 00:00:50.000 + +Yes sir, and what would you like with it, sir? A whisky? + +00:00:50.000 --> 00:00:52.000 + +No, a bottle of wine. + +00:00:52.000 --> 00:00:56.000 + +Fine, sir, he said between clenched teeth knowing full well it was a most unrewarding part. + +00:00:56.000 --> 00:00:59.000 + +This is the silliest sketch I've ever been in. + +00:00:59.000 --> 00:01:01.500 + +Shall we stop it? + +00:01:01.500 --> 00:01:05.000 + +Yeah, all right. [action] They get up and walk out. + +00:01:05.000 --> 00:01:07.500 +[caption] THE END + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_33/0_head_tail.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_33/0_head_tail.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..d91513fe --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_33/0_head_tail.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,60 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Intro titles, opening organ gag, announcers, and end interlude/credits for Monty Python's Flying Circus: Just the Words - Episode 33 + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] A light comes up on an organ in the centre of a concert-hall stage. Applause. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:12.000 +[action] The organist with wild hair appears from left, walks pleased to the organ, sits, raises his hands. + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:18.000 +[action] His clothes fly into the air; he is naked. He plays the usual chords. + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:24.000 +[action] Cut on the last note to a naked quartet with identical grins, fright wigs and blacked-out teeth staring maniacally at the camera. + +00:00:24.000 --> 00:00:27.500 + +And now… + +00:00:27.500 --> 00:00:30.500 + +It's… + +00:00:30.500 --> 00:00:38.000 +[action] Animated titles. + +00:00:38.000 --> 00:00:42.000 + +Monty Python's Flying Circus. + +00:21:30.000 --> 00:21:45.000 +[caption] THE BBC WOULD LIKE TO APOLOGIZE TO EVERYONE IN THE WORLD FOR THE LAST ITEM. IT WAS DISGUSTING AND BAD AND THOROUGHLY DISOBEDIENT AND PLEASE DON'T BOTHER TO PHONE UP BECAUSE WE KNOW IT WAS VERY TASTELESS, BUT THEY DIDN'T REALLY MEAN IT AND THEY DO ALL COME FROM BROKEN HOMES AND HAVE VERY UNHAPPY PERSONAL LIVES, ESPECIALLY ERIC. ANYWAY, THEY'RE REALLY VERY NICE PEOPLE UNDERNEATH AND VERY WARM IN THE TRADITIONAL SHOW BUSINESS WAY AND PLEASE DON'T WRITE IN EITHER BECAUSE THE BBC IS GOING THROUGH AN UNHAPPY PHASE AT THE MOMENT - WHAT WITH ITS FATHER DYING AND THE MORTGAGE AND BBC 2 GOING OUT WITH MEN. + +00:21:45.000 --> 00:21:55.000 +[caption] THE BBC WOULD LIKE TO DENY THE LAST APOLOGY. IT IS VERY HAPPY AT HOME AND BBC 2 IS BOUND TO GO THROUGH THIS PHASE, SO FROM ALL OF US HERE GOOD NIGHT, SLEEP WELL, AND HAVE AN ABSOLUTELY SUPER DAY TOMORROW, KISS, KISS. + +00:23:00.000 --> 00:23:06.000 +[action] Fade up on film of seashore, waves breaking on beach. SUPERIMPOSED CAPTION: 'INTERLUDE'. + +00:23:06.000 --> 00:23:25.000 +[action] The film goes on for quite a long time. + +00:23:25.000 --> 00:23:45.000 +[action] The announcer, dressed in medieval Spanish soldier's costume, walks into shot. + +00:23:45.000 --> 00:24:15.000 + +Um, I'm sorry about the … the, er, pause, only I'm afraid the show is a couple of minutes short this week. You know, sometimes the shows aren't really quite as er, long as they ought to be. Beautiful, isn't it. + +00:24:15.000 --> 00:24:35.000 +[action] He walks out of shot; long pause; he walks back. + +00:24:35.000 --> 00:24:55.000 + +Look there's not really a great deal of point in your, sort of hanging on at your end, because I'm afraid there aren't any more jokes or anything. + +00:24:55.000 --> 00:25:20.000 +[action] He walks out of shot. The film continues on the seashore for quite a long time before we finally fade out. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_33/10_Apology.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_33/10_Apology.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..9e3808e9 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_33/10_Apology.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,10 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Anchor #10: Dual BBC apologies as rolling captions. + +00:22:45.000 --> 00:23:05.000 +[caption] THE BBC WOULD LIKE TO APOLOGIZE TO EVERYONE IN THE WORLD FOR THE LAST ITEM. IT WAS DISGUSTING AND BAD AND THOROUGHLY DISOBEDIENT AND PLEASE DON'T BOTHER TO PHONE UP BECAUSE WE KNOW IT WAS VERY TASTELESS, BUT THEY DIDN'T REALLY MEAN IT AND THEY DO ALL COME FROM BROKEN HOMES AND HAVE VERY UNHAPPY PERSONAL LIVES, ESPECIALLY ERIC. ANYWAY, THEY'RE REALLY VERY NICE PEOPLE UNDERNEATH AND VERY WARM IN THE TRADITIONAL SHOW BUSINESS WAY AND PLEASE DON'T WRITE IN EITHER BECAUSE THE BBC IS GOING THROUGH AN UNHAPPY PHASE AT THE MOMENT - WHAT WITH ITS FATHER DYING AND THE MORTGAGE AND BBC 2 GOING OUT WITH MEN. + +00:23:05.000 --> 00:23:18.000 +[caption] THE BBC WOULD LIKE TO DENY THE LAST APOLOGY. IT IS VERY HAPPY AT HOME AND BBC 2 IS BOUND TO GO THROUGH THIS PHASE, SO FROM ALL OF US HERE GOOD NIGHT, SLEEP WELL, AND HAVE AN ABSOLUTELY SUPER DAY TOMORROW, KISS, KISS. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_33/11_The_news_with_Richard_Baker.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_33/11_The_news_with_Richard_Baker.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..a286e740 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_33/11_The_news_with_Richard_Baker.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,11 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Anchor #11: Richard Baker delivers a storage jar bulletin and a final Lemon curry. + +00:23:18.000 --> 00:23:22.000 +[action] Cut to Richard Baker at the traditional news desk. + +00:23:22.000 --> 00:23:34.000 + +We've just heard that an explosion in the kitchens of the House of Lords has resulted in the breakage of seventeen storage jars. Police ruled out foul play. [pause] Lemon curry? + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_33/12_Seashore_interlude_film.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_33/12_Seashore_interlude_film.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..eb2713f2 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_33/12_Seashore_interlude_film.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,27 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Anchor #12: Extended interlude on seashore; announcer explains the short episode. + +00:23:34.000 --> 00:23:40.000 +[action] Fade out. Fade up on film of seashore, waves breaking on beach. + +00:23:40.000 --> 00:23:42.000 +[caption] INTERLUDE + +00:23:42.000 --> 00:23:58.000 +[action] The film continues for quite a long time. Announcer in medieval Spanish soldier costume walks into shot. + +00:23:58.000 --> 00:24:28.000 + +[to camera] Um, I'm sorry about the … the, er, pause, only I'm afraid the show is a couple of minutes short this week. You know, sometimes the shows aren't really quite as er, long as they ought to be. [pause] Beautiful, isn't it. + +00:24:28.000 --> 00:24:48.000 +[action] He walks out of shot; long pause; he walks back. + +00:24:48.000 --> 00:25:08.000 + +Look there's not really a great deal of point in your, sort of hanging on at your end, because I'm afraid there aren't any more jokes or anything. + +00:25:08.000 --> 00:25:30.000 +[action] He walks out of shot. We stay with the seashore film; waves breaking; then fade out. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_33/1_Biggles_dictates_a_letter.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_33/1_Biggles_dictates_a_letter.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..3b37191a --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_33/1_Biggles_dictates_a_letter.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,220 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Anchor #1: The Adventures of Biggles. Part one - Biggles dictates a letter. + +00:00:42.000 --> 00:00:48.000 +[action] Cut to stock film of First World War fighter planes in a dog-fight. Heroic war music. + +00:00:48.000 --> 00:00:53.000 + +The Adventures of Biggles. Part one - Biggles dictates a letter. + +00:00:53.000 --> 00:00:58.000 +[action] Mix through to Biggles and secretary in an office. + +00:00:58.000 --> 00:01:02.500 + +Miss Bladder, take a letter. + +00:01:02.500 --> 00:01:06.000 + +Yes, Señor Biggles. + +00:01:06.000 --> 00:01:14.000 + +Don't call me señor! I'm not a Spanish person. You must call me Mr Biggles, or Group Captain Biggles or Mary Biggles if I'm dressed as my wife, but never señor. + +00:01:14.000 --> 00:01:16.000 + +Sorry. + +00:01:16.000 --> 00:01:19.000 + +I've never even been to Spain. + +00:01:19.000 --> 00:01:22.000 + +You went to Ibiza last year. + +00:01:22.000 --> 00:01:32.000 + +That's still not grounds for calling me señor, or Don Beeg-les for that matter. Right, Dear King Haakon… + +00:01:32.000 --> 00:01:35.000 + +Of Norway, is that? + +00:01:35.000 --> 00:01:38.000 + +Just put down what I say. + +00:01:38.000 --> 00:01:40.500 + +Do I put that down? + +00:01:40.500 --> 00:01:43.500 + +Of course you don't put that down. + +00:01:43.500 --> 00:01:46.500 + +Well what about that? + +00:01:46.500 --> 00:01:59.000 + +Look. [action] She types. Don't put that down. Just put down - wait a mo - wait a mo. [action] Puts on antlers. Now, when I've got these antlers on I am dictating and when I take them off [action] takes them off I am not dictating. + +00:01:59.000 --> 00:02:02.000 +[action] types I am not dictating. + +00:02:02.000 --> 00:02:07.000 + +What? [action] She types; puts the antlers on. Read that back. + +00:02:07.000 --> 00:02:12.000 + +Dear King Haakon, I am not dictating what? + +00:02:12.000 --> 00:02:15.000 + +No, no, no, you loopy brothel inmate. + +00:02:15.000 --> 00:02:22.000 + +I've had enough of this. I am not a courtesan. [action] Moves round to front of the desk, sits on it and crosses her legs provocatively. + +00:02:22.000 --> 00:02:36.000 + +Oh, oh, 'courtesan', oh aren't we grand. Harlot's not good enough for us eh? Paramour, concubine, fille de joie. That's what we are not. Well listen to me my fine fellow, you are a bit of tail, that's what you are. + +00:02:36.000 --> 00:02:39.000 + +I am not, you demented fictional character. + +00:02:39.000 --> 00:02:44.000 + +Algy says you are. He says you're no better than you should be. + +00:02:44.000 --> 00:02:47.000 + +And how would he know? + +00:02:47.000 --> 00:02:53.000 + +And just what do you mean by that? Are you calling my old fictional comrade-in-arms a fairy? + +00:02:53.000 --> 00:02:59.000 + +Fairy! Poof's not good enough for Algy, is it? He's got to be a bleedin' fairy. Mincing old RAF queen. [action] Sits at the desk. + +00:02:59.000 --> 00:03:04.000 +[action] Into the intercom. Algy, I have to see you. + +00:03:04.000 --> 00:03:10.000 + +Right ho. [action] He enters. What ho everyone. + +00:03:10.000 --> 00:03:12.500 + +Are you gay? + +00:03:12.500 --> 00:03:16.500 + +I should bally well say so, old fruit. + +00:03:16.500 --> 00:03:21.000 +Ugh! [action] He shoots him. + +00:03:21.000 --> 00:03:40.000 + +Dear King Haakon … oh … [action] takes the antlers off. Dear King Haakon. [action] The secretary types. Just a line to thank you for the eels. Mary thought they were really scrummy, comma, so did I full stop. I've just heard that Algy was a poof, exclamation mark. What would Captain W. E. Johns have said, question mark. Sorry to mench, but if you've finished with the lawn-edger could you pop it in the post. Love Biggles, Algy deceased and Ginger. Ginger! [action] Puts the antlers on. + +00:03:40.000 --> 00:03:42.000 + +What? + +00:03:42.000 --> 00:03:45.000 + +Rhyming slang - ginger beer. + +00:03:45.000 --> 00:03:47.000 + +Oh. + +00:03:47.000 --> 00:03:50.000 +[action] Into the intercom. Ginger. + +00:03:50.000 --> 00:03:53.000 + +Hello, sweetie. + +00:03:53.000 --> 00:03:55.000 + +I have to see you. + +00:03:55.000 --> 00:04:01.000 +[action] The door opens; Ginger enters as a camp flyer with sequins, eye make-up, silver stars on his cheeks. + +00:04:01.000 --> 00:04:03.500 + +Yes, Biggles? + +00:04:03.500 --> 00:04:06.000 + +Are you a poof + +00:04:06.000 --> 00:04:10.000 + +[action] Camp outrage. I should say not. + +00:04:10.000 --> 00:04:15.000 + +Thank God for that. Good lad. [action] Ginger exits. Stout fellow, salt of the earth, backbone of England. Funny, he looks like a poof. [action] Takes off the antlers. Dear Princess Margaret. + +00:04:15.000 --> 00:04:18.000 +[action] Pantomime Princess Margaret enters from cupboard. + +00:04:18.000 --> 00:04:20.000 + +Hello. + +00:04:20.000 --> 00:04:24.000 + +Get back in the cupboard you pantomimetic royal person. [action] She goes. + +00:04:24.000 --> 00:04:26.000 +[action] Quick cut to a loony. + +00:04:26.000 --> 00:04:28.000 + +Lemon curry? + +00:04:28.000 --> 00:04:30.000 +[action] Cut back to Biggles. + +00:04:30.000 --> 00:04:44.000 + +Dear real Princess Margaret, thank you for the eels, full stop. They were absolutely delicious and unmistakably regal, full stop. Sorry to mench but if you've finished with the hairdryer could you pop it in the post? Yours fictionally Biggles, Oh, PS see you at the Saxe-Coburgs' canasta evening. [action] Puts the antlers on. That should puzzle her. + +00:04:44.000 --> 00:04:47.000 + +[sexily] Si Señor Biggles. + +00:04:47.000 --> 00:04:50.000 + +Silence, naughty lady of the night! + +00:04:50.000 --> 00:04:56.000 +[action] Bring up heroic music and mix through to stock film of fighter planes in dog-fight. + +00:04:56.000 --> 00:05:00.000 + +Next week part two - 'Biggles Flies Undone'. + +00:05:00.000 --> 00:05:08.000 +[action] Then a very noisy and violent animation sketch. + +00:05:08.000 --> 00:05:11.000 + +Meanwhile not very far away. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_33/2_Climbing_the_north_face_of_the_Uxbridge_Road.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_33/2_Climbing_the_north_face_of_the_Uxbridge_Road.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..a0a68940 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_33/2_Climbing_the_north_face_of_the_Uxbridge_Road.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,68 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Anchor #2: British climbing expedition attempts the Uxbridge Road pavement ‘north face’. + +00:05:11.000 --> 00:05:18.000 +[action] Mountain climbers with ropes, carabiners, helmets, pitons, hammers, etc., roped together, apparently climbing. + +00:05:18.000 --> 00:05:35.000 + +Climbing. The world's loneliest sport, where hardship and philosophy go hand in glove. And here, another British expedition, attempting to be the first man to successfully climb the north face of the Uxbridge Road. [action] Pull out: they are climbing along a wide pavement; a shopper with pram enters. This four-man rope has been climbing tremendously. BBC cameras were there to film every inch. + +00:05:35.000 --> 00:05:42.000 +[action] Cut to a BBC cameraman clinging to a lamppost, filming, in climbing gear too. + +00:05:42.000 --> 00:05:54.000 +[action] Cut to papier mache model of the Uxbridge Road, route neatly marked, pins for camps. + +00:05:54.000 --> 00:06:24.000 + +[voice over] The major assault on the Uxbridge Road has been going on for about three weeks, really ever since they established base camp here at the junction of Willesden Road, and from there they climbed steadily to establish camp two, outside Lewis's, and it's taken them another three days to establish camp three, here outside the post office. [action] Pup tent planted on the side of a large post-box with a union jack. Well they've spent a good night in there last night in preparation for the final assault today. The leader of the expedition is twenty-nine-year-old Bert Tagg - a local headmaster and mother of three. + +00:06:24.000 --> 00:06:27.000 +[action] Cut to Bert crawling along the pavement; interviewer crouches beside him. + +00:06:27.000 --> 00:06:30.000 + +Bert. How's it going? + +00:06:30.000 --> 00:06:45.000 + +Well, it's a bit gripping is this, Chris. [caption] heavy breathing interspersed. I've got to try and reach that bus stop in an hour or so and I'm doing it by… [action] rearranging rope … damn … I'm doing it, er, by laying back on this gutter so I'm kind of guttering and laying back at the same time, and philosophizing. + +00:06:45.000 --> 00:06:49.000 + +Bert, some people say this is crazy. + +00:06:49.000 --> 00:06:53.000 + +Aye, well but they said Crippen was crazy didn't they? + +00:06:53.000 --> 00:06:56.000 + +Crippen was crazy. + +00:06:56.000 --> 00:07:04.000 + +Oh, well there you are then. [shouts] John, I'm sending you down this carabiner on white. [action] There is a white rope between Bert and John. + +00:07:04.000 --> 00:07:06.000 +[action] Quick cut to Viking. + +00:07:06.000 --> 00:07:08.000 + +Lemon curry? + +00:07:08.000 --> 00:07:11.000 +[action] Cut back to the street. + +00:07:11.000 --> 00:07:17.000 + +Now you see he's putting a peg down there because I'm quite a way up now, and if I come unstuck here I go down quite a long way. + +00:07:17.000 --> 00:07:23.000 +[action] Leaving him. Such quiet courage is typical of the way these brave chaps shrug off danger. Like it or not, you've got to admire the skill that goes into it. + +00:07:23.000 --> 00:07:30.000 +[action] By the miracle of stop action, they all fall off the road, back down the pavement. Passers-by, also in stop action, walk by normally, ignoring the fall. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_33/3_Lifeboat.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_33/3_Lifeboat.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..0ef9b93b --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_33/3_Lifeboat.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,96 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Anchor #3: Lifeboatmen in a suburban kitchen and a gale-tossed bakery on deck. + +00:07:30.000 --> 00:07:40.000 +[action] Cut to an ordinary kitchen. A Mrs Pinnet type lady stuffs a chicken with unlikely objects. Door opens: sound of rain, wind and storm. A lifeboatman enters, soaked, shuts the door. + +00:07:40.000 --> 00:07:45.000 + +[action] taking off sou'wester, shaking water. Oh it's terrible up on deck. + +00:07:45.000 --> 00:07:47.000 + +Up on deck? + +00:07:47.000 --> 00:07:50.000 + +Yes on deck. It's diabolical weather. + +00:07:50.000 --> 00:07:52.000 + +What deck, dear? + +00:07:52.000 --> 00:07:55.000 + +The deck, The deck of the lifeboat. + +00:07:55.000 --> 00:07:58.000 + +This isn't a lifeboat, dear. This is 24, Parker Street. + +00:07:58.000 --> 00:08:00.000 + +This is the Newhaven Lifeboat. + +00:08:00.000 --> 00:08:02.000 + +No it's not, dear. + +00:08:02.000 --> 00:08:10.000 +[action] He puts on sou'wester, opens back door; wind and rain blast. Cut to outside: suburban calm, lawns, flowers, windless, rainless. Noise cuts when he peeks out; returns when he shuts door. + +00:08:10.000 --> 00:08:13.000 + +You're right. This isn't a lifeboat at all. + +00:08:13.000 --> 00:08:16.000 + +No, I wouldn't live here if it was, + +00:08:16.000 --> 00:08:20.000 + +Do you mind if I sit down for a minute and collect my wits? + +00:08:20.000 --> 00:08:23.000 + +No, you do that, I'll make you a nice cup of tea. + +00:08:23.000 --> 00:08:25.000 + +Thanks very much. + +00:08:25.000 --> 00:08:30.000 +[action] Door flies open. Two other rain-soaked lifeboatmen appear. + +00:08:30.000 --> 00:08:33.000 + +Oooh, it's a wild night up top. + +00:08:33.000 --> 00:08:35.000 + +Your turn on deck soon, Charlie. + +00:08:35.000 --> 00:08:37.000 + +It's not a lifeboat, Frank. + +00:08:37.000 --> 00:08:39.000 + +What? + +00:08:39.000 --> 00:08:41.000 + +What do you mean? + +00:08:41.000 --> 00:08:45.000 + +It's not a lifeboat. It's this lady's house. + +00:08:45.000 --> 00:08:52.000 +[action] The two lifeboatmen peer out of door amid storm sound; outside shot shows calm. They shout: + +00:08:52.000 --> 00:08:56.000 + +Captain! Captain! Ahoy there! Ahoy there! Captain!! + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_33/4_Old_lady_snoopers.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_33/4_Old_lady_snoopers.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..60211503 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_33/4_Old_lady_snoopers.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,192 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Anchor #4: Enid and Gladys operate elaborate neighborhood surveillance. + +00:08:56.000 --> 00:09:02.000 +[action] Reverse angle: window across the road. Net curtain moves; an eye peers out: elderly spinster Gladys. + +00:09:02.000 --> 00:09:05.000 + +Who's that shouting? + +00:09:05.000 --> 00:09:20.000 +[action] Pull out: sitting room crammed with telescopes, radar scanners, computers, tape and video recorders, oscilloscopes, aerials. Enid at a console with knitting. + +00:09:20.000 --> 00:09:23.000 + +It's a man outside Number 24. + +00:09:23.000 --> 00:09:26.000 + +Try it on the five inch, Gladys. + +00:09:26.000 --> 00:09:33.000 + +[action] Looking at array. I can't. I've got that fixed on the Baileys at Number 13. Their new lodger moves in today. + +00:09:33.000 --> 00:09:39.000 + +All right, hold 13 on the five-inch and transfer the Cartwrights to the digital scanner. + +00:09:39.000 --> 00:09:48.000 +[action] Gladys leaps to tape deck, presses levers and switches. Tape reversing sounds. Lights flash. A blurred image of a lady in the street comes up on a monitor. + +00:09:48.000 --> 00:09:51.000 + +Hold on, Mrs Pettigrew's coming back from the doctor's. + +00:09:51.000 --> 00:09:56.000 + +All right, bring her up on two. What's the duration reading on the oscillator? + +00:09:56.000 --> 00:09:58.000 + +48.47. + +00:09:58.000 --> 00:10:02.000 + +Well that's a long time for someone who's just had a routine checkup. + +00:10:02.000 --> 00:10:06.000 +[action] reading a graph. Yes, her pulse rate's 146! + +00:10:06.000 --> 00:10:10.000 + +Zoom in on the 16mm and hold her, Enid. + +00:10:10.000 --> 00:10:12.000 + +Roger, Gladys. + +00:10:12.000 --> 00:10:24.000 + +[action] Gladys dips into control seat of huge mobile telescope. View through telescope sharpens towards side door of Number 24. Move the curtain, Enid. [action] Curtain is opened a little. Thank you, love. + +00:10:24.000 --> 00:10:35.000 +[action] Cut to Mrs Neves's kitchen: absolutely full of lifeboatmen, chatting and drinking tea. + +00:10:35.000 --> 00:10:40.000 + +Yes, it's one of those new self-righting models. Newhaven was about the first place in the country to get one. + +00:10:40.000 --> 00:10:43.000 + +What's the displacement on one of them jobs then? + +00:10:43.000 --> 00:10:46.000 + +Oh it's about 140-150 per square inch. + +00:10:46.000 --> 00:10:48.500 + +Who's for fruit cake? + +00:10:48.500 --> 00:10:51.000 +[crowd] Oh yes, please, please. + +00:10:51.000 --> 00:10:58.000 + +Yes, right, macaroons, that's two dozen fruit cakes, half a dozen macaroons. Right ho. Won't be a jiffy then. + +00:10:58.000 --> 00:11:10.000 +[action] She puts a scarf on, picks up a basket and goes out the front door. As she opens, storm sound carries us to next shot. + +00:11:10.000 --> 00:11:20.000 +[action] Cut to deck of a lifeboat; rain-lashed, heaving, wind-tossed. Mrs Neves struggles along the deck, hammers on a forward hatch. + +00:11:20.000 --> 00:11:22.500 + +Yoohoo! Mrs Edwards! + +00:11:22.500 --> 00:11:26.000 +[action] Hatch opens: cosy shop-keeping pepperpot appears. + +00:11:26.000 --> 00:11:27.500 + +Hello. + +00:11:27.500 --> 00:11:31.000 + +Hello, two dozen fruit cakes and half a dozen macaroons. + +00:11:31.000 --> 00:11:35.000 + +Sorry love, no macaroons. How about a nice vanilla sponge? + +00:11:35.000 --> 00:11:37.000 + +Yes, that'll be lovely. + +00:11:37.000 --> 00:11:45.000 + +Right ho. [action] Ship's horn; both look. There's that nice herring trawler come for their Kup Kakes. Excuse me. [action] Produces a loudhailer. Hello, Captain Smith? + +00:11:45.000 --> 00:11:47.000 + +Hallooooo! + +00:11:47.000 --> 00:11:50.000 +[action] Mrs Edwards hurls a box of Kup Kakes off deck. + +00:11:50.000 --> 00:11:52.000 + +Kup Kakes to starboard. + +00:11:52.000 --> 00:11:53.500 + +Coming. + +00:11:53.500 --> 00:11:57.000 + +I'll pay you at the end of the week, all right? + +00:11:57.000 --> 00:11:58.500 + +OK, right ho. + +00:11:58.500 --> 00:12:05.000 +[action] Mrs Neves struggles back along the deck. Cut to stock film of Ark Royal in a storm. + +00:12:05.000 --> 00:12:08.000 + +Here; it's the Ark Royal, Doris. Have you got their rock buns ready? + +00:12:08.000 --> 00:12:10.000 +[caption] Ship's horn. + +00:12:10.000 --> 00:12:11.500 + +Hang on! + +00:12:11.500 --> 00:12:15.000 +[action] Doris appears at the hatch with two cake boxes. + +00:12:15.000 --> 00:12:18.000 + +Here we are, five for them and five for HMS Eagle. + +00:12:18.000 --> 00:12:23.000 +Right ho.. [action] Takes them and throws both overboard; an officer climbs up the side. + +00:12:23.000 --> 00:12:26.000 + +HMS Defiant? Two set teas please. + +00:12:26.000 --> 00:12:30.000 + +Two set teas, Doris. Forty-eight pence. There we are, thank you. + +00:12:30.000 --> 00:12:34.000 +[action] Money is handed over. Teas emerge on two little trays with delicate crockery. + +00:12:34.000 --> 00:12:36.000 + +By the way, do you do lunches? + +00:12:36.000 --> 00:12:38.000 + +No, morning coffee and teas only. + +00:12:38.000 --> 00:12:42.000 +Right ho. [action] Holding the teas, he jumps overboard. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_33/5_Storage_jars.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_33/5_Storage_jars.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..8db47ca1 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_33/5_Storage_jars.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,27 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Anchor #5: Urgent documentary ‘Storage Jars’ and Bolivian report. + +00:12:42.000 --> 00:12:46.000 +[action] Very quick series of stills of storage jars. + +00:12:46.000 --> 00:12:49.000 +[caption] STORAGE JARS + +00:12:49.000 --> 00:12:56.000 +[action] Urgent documentary music. Mix through to impressive set. Presenter swivels to camera. + +00:12:56.000 --> 00:13:16.000 + +Good evening and welcome to another edition of 'Storage Jars'. On tonight's programme Mikos Antoniarkis, the Greek rebel leader who seized power in Athens this morning, tells us what he keeps in storage jars. [action] Cut to photo of a guerrilla leader with a gun; dramatic chord; back to presenter. From strife-torn Bolivia, Ronald Rodgers reports on storage jars there. [action] Still of a Bolivian city; dramatic chord; back to presenter. And closer to home, the first dramatic pictures of the mass jail-break near the storage jar factory in Maidenhead. All this and more in 'Storage Jars'! + +00:13:16.000 --> 00:13:22.000 +[action] Cut to a road before smouldering rubble. Dull thuds of mortars. Reporter in short sleeves, tight shot. Explosions behind at intervals. + +00:13:22.000 --> 00:13:58.000 + +This is La Paz, Bolivia, behind me you can hear the thud of mortars and the high-pitched whine of rockets, as the battle for control of this volatile republic shakes the foundations of this old city. [action] Pull out to reveal a trestle table with a range of different-sized storage jars. But whatever their political inclinations these Bolivians are all keen users of storage jars. [caption] Explosions continue. Here the largest size is used for rice and for mangoes - a big local crop. Unlike most revolutionary South American states they've an intermediary size in between the 2 lb and 5 lb jars. This gives this poor but proud people a useful jar for apricots, plums and stock cubes. The smallest jar - this little 2oz jar, for sweets, chocolates and even little shallots. No longer used in the West it remains here as an unspoken monument to the days when La Paz knew better times. Ronald Rodgers, 'Storage Jars', La Paz. + +00:13:58.000 --> 00:14:04.000 +[animation] Television is bad for your eyes. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_33/6_The_show_so_far.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_33/6_The_show_so_far.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..60c98c43 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_33/6_The_show_so_far.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,24 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Anchor #6: Recap gag with hammer and Lemon curry. + +00:14:04.000 --> 00:14:07.000 +[caption] THE SHOW SO FAR + +00:14:07.000 --> 00:14:10.000 +[action] Cut to a man sitting at a desk with a script. + +00:14:10.000 --> 00:14:52.000 + +Hello, the, er, show so far…well it all started with the organist losing all his clothes as he sat down at the organ, and after this had happened and we had seen the titles of the show, we saw Biggles dictating a letter to his secretary, who thought he was Spanish, and whom he referred to as a harlot and a woman of the night, although she preferred to be called a courtesan. Then we saw some people trying to climb a road in Uxbridge. And then there were some cartoons and then some lifeboatmen came into a woman's sitting room and after a bit the woman went out to buy some cakes on a lifeboat and then a naval officer jumped into the sea. Then we saw a man telling us about storage jars from Bolivia, then there were some more cartoons and a man told us about what happened on the show so far and a great hammer came down and hit him on the head. [action] He frowns. I don't remember that? + +00:14:52.000 --> 00:14:55.000 +[action] A big hammer hits him on the head. + +00:14:55.000 --> 00:14:58.000 +[action] Quick cut to 'It's' man. + +00:14:58.000 --> 00:15:00.000 + +Lemon curry? + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_33/7_Cheese_shop.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_33/7_Cheese_shop.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..5dfe8956 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_33/7_Cheese_shop.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,528 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Anchor #7: Mousebender attempts to buy cheese from Mr Wensleydale. + +00:15:00.000 --> 00:15:10.000 +[action] Montage of photographs: Mousebender walking, looking up at 'Ye Olde Cheese Emporium'. Signs include 'Purveyor of Fine Cheese…' and 'Licensed for Public Dancing'. Mousebender enters. + +00:15:10.000 --> 00:15:14.000 +[action] Interior: Greek music; two city gents Greek dancing to bouzouki. No cheese visible. + +00:15:14.000 --> 00:15:17.000 + +Good morning, sir. + +00:15:17.000 --> 00:15:30.000 + +Good Morning. I was sitting in the public library on Thurmon Street just now, skimming through 'Rogue Herries' by Horace Walpole, when suddenly I came over all peckish. + +00:15:30.000 --> 00:15:32.000 + +Peckish, sir? + +00:15:32.000 --> 00:15:33.500 + +Esurient. + +00:15:33.500 --> 00:15:35.000 + +Eh? + +00:15:35.000 --> 00:15:38.000 + +[broad Yorkshire] Eee I were all hungry, like! + +00:15:38.000 --> 00:15:39.500 + +Oh, hungry. + +00:15:39.500 --> 00:15:50.000 + +[normal] In a nutshell. So I thought to myself, 'a little fermented curd will do the trick'. So I curtailed my Walpolling activites, sallied forth and infiltrated your place of purveyance to negotiate the vending of some cheesy comestibles. [action] Smacks his lips. + +00:15:50.000 --> 00:15:51.500 + +Come again. + +00:15:51.500 --> 00:15:54.000 + +[broad northern] I want to buy some cheese. + +00:15:54.000 --> 00:15:57.000 + +Oh, I thought you were complaining about the music! + +00:15:57.000 --> 00:16:01.000 + +[normal] Heaven forbid. I am one who delights in all manifestations of the terpsichorean muse. + +00:16:01.000 --> 00:16:02.500 + +Sorry? + +00:16:02.500 --> 00:16:05.000 + +I like a nice dance - you're forced to. + +00:16:05.000 --> 00:16:07.000 +[action] Quick cut to a Viking. + +00:16:07.000 --> 00:16:08.500 + +[broad Northern accent] Anyway. + +00:16:08.500 --> 00:16:10.500 +[action] Back to cheese shop. + +00:16:10.500 --> 00:16:12.000 + +Who said that? + +00:16:12.000 --> 00:16:14.500 + +[normal] Now my good man, some cheese, please. + +00:16:14.500 --> 00:16:17.000 + +Yes certainly, sir. What would you like? + +00:16:17.000 --> 00:16:19.500 + +Well, how about a little Red Leicester. + +00:16:19.500 --> 00:16:22.000 + +I'm, afraid we're fresh out of Red Leicester, sir. + +00:16:22.000 --> 00:16:24.500 + +Oh, never mind. How are you on Tilsit? + +00:16:24.500 --> 00:16:27.000 + +Never at the end of the week, sir. Always get it fresh first thing on Monday. + +00:16:27.000 --> 00:16:31.000 + +Tish tish. No matter. Well, four ounces of Caerphilly, then, if you please, stout yeoman. + +00:16:31.000 --> 00:16:34.000 + +Ah well, it's been on order for two weeks, sir, I was expecting it this morning. + +00:16:34.000 --> 00:16:36.000 + +Yes, it's not my day, is it? Er, Bel Paese? + +00:16:36.000 --> 00:16:37.500 + +Sorry. + +00:16:37.500 --> 00:16:39.000 + +Red Windsor? + +00:16:39.000 --> 00:16:41.500 + +Normally, sir, yes, but today the van broke down. + +00:16:41.500 --> 00:16:43.000 + +Ah. Stilton? + +00:16:43.000 --> 00:16:44.500 + +Sorry. + +00:16:44.500 --> 00:16:48.000 + +Gruyere? Emmental? + +00:16:48.000 --> 00:16:49.500 + +No. + +00:16:49.500 --> 00:16:51.000 + +Any Norwegian Jarlsberger? + +00:16:51.000 --> 00:16:52.500 + +No. + +00:16:52.500 --> 00:16:54.000 + +Liptauer? + +00:16:54.000 --> 00:16:55.500 + +No. + +00:16:55.500 --> 00:16:57.000 + +Lancashire? + +00:16:57.000 --> 00:16:58.500 + +No. + +00:16:58.500 --> 00:17:00.000 + +White Stilton? + +00:17:00.000 --> 00:17:01.500 + +No. + +00:17:01.500 --> 00:17:03.000 + +Danish Blue? + +00:17:03.000 --> 00:17:04.500 + +No. + +00:17:04.500 --> 00:17:06.000 + +Double Gloucester? + +00:17:06.000 --> 00:17:07.500 + +…No. + +00:17:07.500 --> 00:17:09.000 + +Cheshire? + +00:17:09.000 --> 00:17:10.500 + +No. + +00:17:10.500 --> 00:17:12.500 + +Any Dorset Blue Vinney? + +00:17:12.500 --> 00:17:14.000 + +No. + +00:17:14.000 --> 00:17:18.000 + +Brie, Roquefort, Pont-l'Évêque, Port Salut, Savoyard, Saint-Paulin, Carre-de-L'Est, Boursin, Bresse-Bleu, Perle de Champagne, Camenbert? + +00:17:18.000 --> 00:17:21.000 + +Ah! We do have some Camembert, sir. + +00:17:21.000 --> 00:17:22.500 + +You do! Excellent. + +00:17:22.500 --> 00:17:24.500 + +It's a bit runny, sir. + +00:17:24.500 --> 00:17:26.000 + +Oh, I like it runny. + +00:17:26.000 --> 00:17:28.500 + +Well as a matter of fact it's very runny, sir. + +00:17:28.500 --> 00:17:32.000 + +No matter. No matter. Hand over le fromage de la Belle France qui s'apelle Camembert, s'il vous plaît. + +00:17:32.000 --> 00:17:34.000 + +I think it's runnier than you like it, sir. + +00:17:34.000 --> 00:17:37.000 + +[smiling grimly] I don't care how excrementally runny it is. Hand it over with all speed. + +00:17:37.000 --> 00:17:41.000 +Yes, sir. [action] Bends below counter and reappears. Oh… + +00:17:41.000 --> 00:17:42.500 + +What? + +00:17:42.500 --> 00:17:44.500 + +The cat's eaten it. + +00:17:44.500 --> 00:17:46.000 + +Has he? + +00:17:46.000 --> 00:17:47.500 + +She, sir. + +00:17:47.500 --> 00:17:49.000 + +Gouda? + +00:17:49.000 --> 00:17:50.500 + +No. + +00:17:50.500 --> 00:17:52.000 + +Edam? + +00:17:52.000 --> 00:17:53.500 + +No. + +00:17:53.500 --> 00:17:55.000 + +Caithness? + +00:17:55.000 --> 00:17:56.500 + +No. + +00:17:56.500 --> 00:17:58.000 + +Smoked Austrian? + +00:17:58.000 --> 00:17:59.500 + +No. + +00:17:59.500 --> 00:18:01.000 + +Sage Darby? + +00:18:01.000 --> 00:18:02.500 + +No, sir. + +00:18:02.500 --> 00:18:05.000 + +You do have some cheese, do you? + +00:18:05.000 --> 00:18:08.000 + +Certainly, sir. It's a cheese shop, sir. We've got… + +00:18:08.000 --> 00:18:09.500 + +No, no, no, don't tell me. I'm keen to guess. + +00:18:09.500 --> 00:18:11.000 + +Fair enough. + +00:18:11.000 --> 00:18:12.500 + +Wensleydale. + +00:18:12.500 --> 00:18:13.500 + +Yes, sir? + +00:18:13.500 --> 00:18:15.500 + +Splendid. Well, I'll have some of that then, please. + +00:18:15.500 --> 00:18:18.000 + +Oh, I'm sorry sir, I thought you were reffering to me, Mr Wensleydale. + +00:18:18.000 --> 00:18:19.500 + +Gorgonzola? + +00:18:19.500 --> 00:18:21.000 + +No. + +00:18:21.000 --> 00:18:22.500 + +Parmesan? + +00:18:22.500 --> 00:18:24.000 + +No. + +00:18:24.000 --> 00:18:25.500 + +Mozzarella? + +00:18:25.500 --> 00:18:27.000 + +No. + +00:18:27.000 --> 00:18:28.500 + +Pippo Crème? + +00:18:28.500 --> 00:18:30.000 + +No. + +00:18:30.000 --> 00:18:31.500 + +Any Danish Fynbo? + +00:18:31.500 --> 00:18:33.000 + +No. + +00:18:33.000 --> 00:18:35.000 + +Czechoslovakian Sheep's Milk Cheese? + +00:18:35.000 --> 00:18:36.500 + +No. + +00:18:36.500 --> 00:18:38.000 + +Venezuelan Beaver Cheese? + +00:18:38.000 --> 00:18:39.500 + +Not today sir, no. + +00:18:39.500 --> 00:18:43.000 +[pause] + +00:18:43.000 --> 00:18:45.500 + +Well let's keep it simple, how about Cheddar? + +00:18:45.500 --> 00:18:49.000 + +Well, I'm afraid we don't get much call for it around these parts. + +00:18:49.000 --> 00:18:52.000 + +Not call for it? It's the single most popular cheese in the world! + +00:18:52.000 --> 00:18:54.000 + +Not round these parts, sir. + +00:18:54.000 --> 00:18:56.500 + +And pray what is the most popular cheese round these parts? + +00:18:56.500 --> 00:18:58.500 + +Ilchester, sir. + +00:18:58.500 --> 00:19:00.000 + +I see. + +00:19:00.000 --> 00:19:03.000 + +Yes, sir. It's quite staggeringly popular in the manor, squire. + +00:19:03.000 --> 00:19:04.500 + +Is it. + +00:19:04.500 --> 00:19:07.000 + +Yes sir, it's our number-one seller. + +00:19:07.000 --> 00:19:08.500 + +Is it. + +00:19:08.500 --> 00:19:10.000 + +Yes sir. + +00:19:10.000 --> 00:19:11.500 + +Ilchester, eh? + +00:19:11.500 --> 00:19:12.500 + +Right. + +00:19:12.500 --> 00:19:16.000 + +OK, I'm game. Have you got any, he asked, expecting the answer no? + +00:19:16.000 --> 00:19:19.000 + +I'll have a look, sir…nnnnnnooooooooo. + +00:19:19.000 --> 00:19:21.500 + +It's not much of a cheese shop really, is it? + +00:19:21.500 --> 00:19:23.500 + +Finest in the district, sir. + +00:19:23.500 --> 00:19:26.000 + +And what leads you to that conclusion? + +00:19:26.000 --> 00:19:27.500 + +Well, it's so clean. + +00:19:27.500 --> 00:19:30.000 + +Well, it's certainly uncontaminated by cheese. + +00:19:30.000 --> 00:19:32.000 + +You haven't asked me about Limberger, sir. + +00:19:32.000 --> 00:19:33.500 + +Is it worth it? + +00:19:33.500 --> 00:19:35.000 + +Could be. + +00:19:35.000 --> 00:19:40.000 + +OK, have you— WILL YOU SHUT THAT BLOODY DANCING UP! [action] The music stops. + +00:19:40.000 --> 00:19:41.500 + +[to dancers] Told you so. + +00:19:41.500 --> 00:19:43.500 + +Have you got any Limberger? + +00:19:43.500 --> 00:19:45.000 + +No. + +00:19:45.000 --> 00:19:52.000 + +No, that figures. It was pretty predictable, really. It was an act of purest optimism to pose the question in the first place. Tell me something, do you have any cheese at all? + +00:19:52.000 --> 00:19:53.500 + +Yes, sir. + +00:19:53.500 --> 00:19:58.000 + +Now I'm going to ask you that question once more, and if you say 'no' I'm going to shoot you through the head. Now, do you have any cheese at all? + +00:19:58.000 --> 00:20:00.000 + +No. + +00:20:00.000 --> 00:20:03.000 +[action] Mousebender shoots him. What a senseless waste of human life. + +00:20:03.000 --> 00:20:08.000 +[action] Mousebender puts a cowboy hat on. Cut to stock shot of man on horse riding into the sunset. Music swells. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_33/8_Philip_Jenkinson_on_Cheese_Westerns.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_33/8_Philip_Jenkinson_on_Cheese_Westerns.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..2e082a7d --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_33/8_Philip_Jenkinson_on_Cheese_Westerns.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,38 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Anchor #8: Philip Jenkinson segment on Cheese Westerns; Rogues and captions. + +00:20:08.000 --> 00:20:11.000 +[caption] ROGUE CHEDDAR (1967) + +00:20:11.000 --> 00:20:13.000 +[caption] FIN + +00:20:13.000 --> 00:20:19.000 +[action] Philip Jenkinson sits at desk, simpering and pouting. + +00:20:19.000 --> 00:20:35.000 + +Horace Walpole's 'Rogue Cheddar', [sniff] one of the first of the Cheese Westerns to be later followed by 'Gunfight at Gruyère Corral', 'Ilchester 73', and 'The Cheese Who Shot Liberty Valence'. While I'm on the subject of Westerns, I want to take a closer look at one of my favourite film directors, Sam Peckinpah, the expatriate from Fresno, California. + +00:20:35.000 --> 00:20:38.000 +[caption] GET ON WITH IT + +00:20:38.000 --> 00:20:41.000 + +In his earliest films, 'Major Dundee', [sniff] + +00:20:41.000 --> 00:20:44.000 +[caption] AND STOP SNIFFING + +00:20:44.000 --> 00:20:53.000 + +'The Wild Bunch' and 'Straw Dogs' he showed his predilection for the utterly truthful and very sexually arousing portrayal of violence [sniff] in its starkest form. [sniff] + +00:20:53.000 --> 00:20:56.000 +[caption] WILL YOU STOP SNIFFING + +00:20:56.000 --> 00:21:01.000 + +In his latest film Peckinpah has moved into the calmer and more lyrical waters of Julian Slade's, 'Salad Days'. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_33/9_Sam_Peckinpah's_'Salad_Days'.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_33/9_Sam_Peckinpah's_'Salad_Days'.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..eadf374d --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_33/9_Sam_Peckinpah's_'Salad_Days'.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,91 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Anchor #9: Lyrical frolic turns into Peckinpah-style bloodbath; Jenkinson riddled; credits roll. + +00:21:01.000 --> 00:21:08.000 +[action] Lyrical scene: boys in white flannels and girls in pretty dresses frolic on a lawn to piano. + +00:21:08.000 --> 00:21:12.000 +[caption] SALAD DAYS (1971) DIRECTOR SAM PECKINPAH + +00:21:12.000 --> 00:21:16.000 +[action] Frolicking and singing cease. Lionel enters holding a tennis racket. + +00:21:16.000 --> 00:21:18.000 + +Hello everybody. + +00:21:18.000 --> 00:21:19.500 + +Hello Lionel. + +00:21:19.500 --> 00:21:22.000 + +I say what a simply super day. + +00:21:22.000 --> 00:21:23.500 + +Gosh yes. + +00:21:23.500 --> 00:21:25.500 + +It's so, you know, sunny. + +00:21:25.500 --> 00:21:28.000 + +Yes isn't it? I say anyone for tennis? + +00:21:28.000 --> 00:21:29.500 + +Oh super! + +00:21:29.500 --> 00:21:31.000 + +What fun. + +00:21:31.000 --> 00:21:33.000 + +I say, Lionel, catch. + +00:21:33.000 --> 00:21:36.000 +[action] He throws the tennis ball. It hits Lionel's head. Lionel claps a hand to forehead; blood seeps. + +00:21:36.000 --> 00:21:37.500 + +Oh gosh. + +00:21:37.500 --> 00:21:42.000 +[action] He tosses racket out of frame; a hideous scream. Camera pans to a girl with racket handle embedded in her stomach; blood pours. + +00:21:42.000 --> 00:21:43.500 + +Oh crikey. + +00:21:43.500 --> 00:21:55.000 +[action] Spitting blood, she collapses, clutching Charles's arm. The arm comes off; buckets of blood burst from shoulder drenching all. He staggers to piano; lid drops, severing pianist's hands. Pianist screams; blood spurts over piano music. + +00:21:55.000 --> 00:22:05.000 +[action] Piano collapses in slow motion from several angles. Intercut terrified faces of girls screaming in slow motion. Piano crushes them; an enormous pool of blood swells beneath. + +00:22:05.000 --> 00:22:12.000 +[action] Julian staggers with piano keyboard through his stomach; turning, the keyboard knocks off the head of a terrified girl; blood geysers. + +00:22:12.000 --> 00:22:16.000 +[action] Pull out and upward as the music starts again. + +00:22:16.000 --> 00:22:20.000 +[action] Cut back to Philip Jenkinson. + +00:22:20.000 --> 00:22:23.000 + +Pretty strong meat there from [sniff] Sam Peckinpah. + +00:22:23.000 --> 00:22:28.000 +[action] Burst of machine-gun fire; holes appear in Jenkinson's shirt; blood spurts in slow motion. Intercut angles. + +00:22:28.000 --> 00:22:30.000 +[caption] TEE HEE + +00:22:30.000 --> 00:22:45.000 +[action] Roll credits over Jenkinson's dying agonies. Fade out. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_34__The_Cycling_Tour/0_Episode34_head_tail.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_34__The_Cycling_Tour/0_Episode34_head_tail.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..cfb8fead --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_34__The_Cycling_Tour/0_Episode34_head_tail.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,49 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated placeholder timings for intro and credits. Includes stage directions and captions in brackets. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:05.000 +[action] The green lush Devon countryside. Theme music. Camera tracks along a hedgerow beside the road; a cyclist’s head bobs above and below. + +00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:08.000 +[caption] THE CYCLING TOUR + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:15.000 +[action] Crash and clang of bicycle with a frightened hen and stifled shout. Music stops abruptly. + +00:00:15.000 --> 00:00:21.000 + +[dialogue] August 18th. Fell off near Bovey Tracey. The pump caught in my trouser leg. + +00:24:00.000 --> 00:24:08.000 +[action] Pither mounts his bike and rides off into the sunset. Music swells. Roll credits. + +00:24:08.000 --> 00:24:15.000 +[action] Field with hedgerow; animated monster peeks over the hedge. + +00:24:15.000 --> 00:24:19.000 + +[dialogue] Hey, I think he's finally gone! + +00:24:19.000 --> 00:24:22.000 + +[dialogue] Ooh yes! + +00:24:22.000 --> 00:24:27.000 +[action] The monsters hop over the fence into the field. + +00:24:27.000 --> 00:24:30.000 + +[dialogue] Ready, Maurice? + +00:24:30.000 --> 00:24:33.000 + +[dialogue] Right-ho, Kevin. Let's go. + +00:24:33.000 --> 00:24:36.000 + +[dialogue] All right, maestro, hit it! + +00:24:36.000 --> 00:24:45.000 +[action] Clodagh Rogers singing 'Jack in a Box' is heard; the two monsters jump up and down enthusiastically. Fade out. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_34__The_Cycling_Tour/1_Mr_Pither.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_34__The_Cycling_Tour/1_Mr_Pither.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..8a4981a4 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_34__The_Cycling_Tour/1_Mr_Pither.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,386 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated placeholder timings. Includes stage directions and captions. Speakers identified where possible. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Devon hedgerow; cyclist’s head bobbing. Theme music. Crash and chicken screech. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:10.000 + +[dialogue] August 18th. Fell off near Bovey Tracey. The pump caught in my trouser leg. + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:16.000 +[action] Interior: transport cafe. Surly proprietor works an espresso machine; Pither chats at the counter. + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:21.000 + +[dialogue] The pump caught in my trouser leg, and my sandwiches were badly crushed. + +00:00:21.000 --> 00:00:24.000 + +[dialogue] 35p please. + +00:00:24.000 --> 00:00:28.000 +[action] Proprietor continues working the machine. + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:33.000 + +[dialogue] These sandwiches, however, were an excellent substitute. + +00:00:33.000 --> 00:00:36.000 +[action] Enormous lorry driver approaches the counter. + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:39.000 + +[dialogue] Give us ten woods, Barney. + +00:00:39.000 --> 00:00:53.000 + +[dialogue] Hello! It's funny how one can go through life, as I have, disliking bananas and being indifferent to cheese, and then be able to eat, and enjoy, a banana and cheese sandwich like this. + +00:00:53.000 --> 00:00:56.000 + +[dialogue] 35p please. + +00:00:56.000 --> 00:01:01.000 + +[dialogue] Ah! I have only a fifty. Do you have change? + +00:01:01.000 --> 00:01:06.000 + +[dialogue] [sarcastic] Well I'll have a look, but I may have to go to the bank. + +00:01:06.000 --> 00:01:08.000 + +[dialogue] I'm most awfully sorry. + +00:01:08.000 --> 00:01:11.000 + +[dialogue] 15p. + +00:01:11.000 --> 00:01:20.000 + +[dialogue] Oh, what a stroke of luck. Well, all the very best. And thank you again for the excellent banana and cheese delicacy. + +00:01:20.000 --> 00:01:25.000 +[action] Pither exits cheerfully. Proprietor watches. + +00:01:25.000 --> 00:01:31.000 +[action] Hedgerows; head bobbing. Crash and pig grunting. + +00:01:31.000 --> 00:01:35.000 + +[dialogue] August 23rd. Fell off near Budleigh Salterton. + +00:01:35.000 --> 00:01:40.000 +[action] Animated Gilliam monster peeks over hedge; cut to a woman gardening. Pither peers over hedge. + +00:01:40.000 --> 00:01:55.000 + +[dialogue] …and the pump caught in my trouser leg… and that's how they were damaged… the eggs… you remember… the hard-boiled eggs… + +00:01:55.000 --> 00:02:05.000 + +[dialogue] …they were in a tupperware container, reputedly self-sealing, which fell open upon contact with the tarmacadam surface of the road… the B489… the Dawlish road… That shouldn't really happen to a self-sealing container, should it? What do you keep your hard-boiled eggs in? + +00:02:05.000 --> 00:02:10.000 +[action] Lady gardener goes back into house. + +00:02:10.000 --> 00:02:21.000 + +[dialogue] [shouting] I think in future I shall lash them to the handlebars with adhesive tape… I'm on a cycling tour of North Cornwall. Must be off. + +00:02:21.000 --> 00:02:26.000 +[action] Hedgerows again. Crash and a cow moos. + +00:02:26.000 --> 00:02:32.000 + +[dialogue] August 26th. Fell off near Ottery St Mary. The pump caught in my trouser leg. Decided to wear short trousers from now on. + +00:02:32.000 --> 00:02:36.000 +[action] Monster peeps; hedgerow, short burst of music, crash. + +00:02:36.000 --> 00:02:40.000 + +[dialogue] Fell off near Tiverton. Perhaps a shorter pump is the answer. + +00:02:40.000 --> 00:02:47.000 +[action] Tiny village high street. Old lady present. Pither cycles in wearing shorts and clips. + +00:02:47.000 --> 00:02:55.000 + +[dialogue] Excuse me, madam, I wonder if you could tell me of a good bicycle shop in this village… + +00:02:55.000 --> 00:02:58.000 + +[dialogue] There's only one shop here. + +00:02:58.000 --> 00:03:05.000 +[action] Camera reveals: 'Bicycle Pump Centre - Specialists In Shorter Bicycle Pumps' and other signs. Back to Pither and old lady. + +00:03:05.000 --> 00:03:09.000 + +[dialogue] What a stroke of luck. Now perhaps cycling will become less precarious. + +00:03:09.000 --> 00:03:13.000 +[action] Interior: doctor's surgery. Knock on door. + +00:03:13.000 --> 00:03:16.000 + +[dialogue] Yes? + +00:03:16.000 --> 00:03:20.000 + +[dialogue] A Mr Pither to see you, doctor. His bicycle pump got caught in his sock. + +00:03:20.000 --> 00:03:23.000 + +[dialogue] Oh, thank you nurse, show him in please. + +00:03:23.000 --> 00:03:26.000 + +[dialogue] This way, please. + +00:03:26.000 --> 00:03:29.000 +[action] Nurse exits; Pither enters in shorts and sweater. + +00:03:29.000 --> 00:03:31.000 + +[dialogue] Morning. + +00:03:31.000 --> 00:03:34.000 + +[dialogue] Oh, a very good morning to you too, Doctor + +00:03:34.000 --> 00:03:37.000 + +[dialogue] Ah, I understand you had an accident? + +00:03:37.000 --> 00:03:40.000 + +[dialogue] Yes, my pump got… + +00:03:40.000 --> 00:03:42.000 + +[dialogue] …caught in your sock. + +00:03:42.000 --> 00:03:46.000 + +[dialogue] Absolutely. Yes. My fruit cake was damaged on one side. + +00:03:46.000 --> 00:03:48.000 + +[dialogue] Well… + +00:03:48.000 --> 00:03:50.000 + +[dialogue] It's got grit all over it. + +00:03:50.000 --> 00:03:53.000 + +[dialogue] Well now, are you in pain? + +00:03:53.000 --> 00:03:55.000 + +[dialogue] Oh, heavens no. + +00:03:55.000 --> 00:03:58.000 + +[dialogue] Ah well, where were you hurt? + +00:03:58.000 --> 00:04:01.000 + +[dialogue] Oh, fortunately, I escaped without injury. + +00:04:01.000 --> 00:04:04.000 + +[dialogue] Well what is the trouble? + +00:04:04.000 --> 00:04:08.000 + +[dialogue] Please, could you tell me the way to Iddesleigh? + +00:04:08.000 --> 00:04:11.000 + +[dialogue] I'm a doctor, you know. + +00:04:11.000 --> 00:04:18.000 + +[dialogue] Oh yes, absolutely… I thought it better to consult a man with some professional qualifications… + +00:04:18.000 --> 00:04:22.000 + +[dialogue] Oh alright. Take this to a chemist. + +00:04:22.000 --> 00:04:24.000 + +[dialogue] Thank you. + +00:04:24.000 --> 00:04:29.000 +[action] Exterior chemist. Chemist points up street; Pither mounts bike. + +00:04:29.000 --> 00:04:34.000 +[action] Hedgerows; head reappears without crash; music resumes. + +00:04:34.000 --> 00:04:38.000 + +[dialogue] September 2nd. Did not fall off outside Iddesley. + +00:04:38.000 --> 00:04:45.000 +[action] Small market town; line of cars; crash. + +00:04:45.000 --> 00:04:49.000 + +[dialogue] Fell off in Tavistock. + +00:04:49.000 --> 00:04:54.000 +[action] Watney's pub. Businessman and secretary sit huddled; Pither nearby with half-pint. + +00:04:54.000 --> 00:05:00.000 + +[dialogue] My foot caught in my trouser leg and that's how the bottle broke. + +00:05:00.000 --> 00:05:03.000 + +[dialogue] Tell her today, you could ring her. + +00:05:03.000 --> 00:05:06.000 + +[dialogue] I can't. I can't. + +00:05:06.000 --> 00:05:09.000 + +[dialogue] I said you'd never guess. + +00:05:09.000 --> 00:05:14.000 + +[dialogue] Sixteen years we've been together. I can't just ring her up. + +00:05:14.000 --> 00:05:17.000 + +[dialogue] Well, if you can't do it now, you never will. + +00:05:17.000 --> 00:05:21.000 + +[dialogue] [tapping his leg] Do you like Tizer? + +00:05:21.000 --> 00:05:23.000 + +[dialogue] What? No. No. + +00:05:23.000 --> 00:05:27.000 + +[dialogue] Do you want me or not, James? It's your decision. + +00:05:27.000 --> 00:05:30.000 + +[dialogue] I suppose it is still available in this area, is it? + +00:05:30.000 --> 00:05:33.000 + +[dialogue] Do you want me or not, James? + +00:05:33.000 --> 00:05:35.000 + +[dialogue] What? + +00:05:35.000 --> 00:05:36.500 + +[dialogue] Tizer. + +00:05:36.500 --> 00:05:39.000 + +[dialogue] Yes or no. + +00:05:39.000 --> 00:05:42.000 + +[dialogue] Is it still available in this area? + +00:05:42.000 --> 00:05:44.000 + +[dialogue] I don't know. + +00:05:44.000 --> 00:05:49.000 + +[dialogue] I see, in that case it's goodbye for ever, James. + +00:05:49.000 --> 00:05:51.000 + +[dialogue] No! I mean yes! + +00:05:51.000 --> 00:05:53.000 + +[dialogue] Oh it is, is it? + +00:05:53.000 --> 00:05:55.000 + +[dialogue] No. + +00:05:55.000 --> 00:05:58.000 + +[dialogue] Oh! You never could make up your mind. + +00:05:58.000 --> 00:06:02.000 + +[dialogue] I can…. I have…. + +00:06:02.000 --> 00:06:06.000 + +[dialogue] [removing ring] Goodbye James. + +00:06:06.000 --> 00:06:09.000 +[action] She runs out sobbing. + +00:06:09.000 --> 00:06:11.000 + +[dialogue] No wait, Lucille! + +00:06:11.000 --> 00:06:15.000 + +[dialogue] Does your lovely daughter like Tizer? Eh? + +00:06:15.000 --> 00:06:17.000 + +[dialogue] Lucille! + +00:06:17.000 --> 00:06:22.000 + +[dialogue] Wouldn't mind buying her a bottle of Tizer…. if it's available in this area, that is. + +00:06:22.000 --> 00:06:26.000 + +[dialogue] Would you like me to show you the door? + +00:06:26.000 --> 00:06:29.000 + +[dialogue] Oh, that's extremely kind of you, but I saw it on the way in. + +00:06:29.000 --> 00:06:32.000 + +[dialogue] You stupid, interfering little rat. + +00:06:32.000 --> 00:06:36.000 + +[dialogue] Oh! The very words of the garage mechanic in Bude! + +00:06:36.000 --> 00:06:40.000 +[action] Man lifts Pither by scruff and seat, carries him to door. + +00:06:40.000 --> 00:06:46.000 + +[dialogue] I had just fallen off my bicycle… and my lemon curd tartlet had… + +00:06:46.000 --> 00:06:48.000 + +[dialogue] Damn your lemon curd tartlet! + +00:06:48.000 --> 00:06:51.000 +[action] Pither is thrown out. Girl sobbing outside. + +00:06:51.000 --> 00:06:54.000 + +[dialogue] Just had a chat with your dad. + +00:06:54.000 --> 00:07:00.000 +[action] Girl bursts into further tears. Pither whistles, cycles off; immediate crash into a car. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_34__The_Cycling_Tour/2_Accidents_involving_food.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_34__The_Cycling_Tour/2_Accidents_involving_food.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..8e114a00 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_34__The_Cycling_Tour/2_Accidents_involving_food.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,117 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated placeholder timings. Includes stage directions and captions. Speakers identified where possible. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:05.000 +[action] Interior of car speeding on highway. Pither in back seat with bicycle; driver Mr Gulliver speaks crisply. + +00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:10.000 + +[dialogue] My rubber instep caught on the rear mudguard stanchion and… + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:14.000 + +[dialogue] Really? And what happened to the corned beef rolls? + +00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:19.000 + +[dialogue] The corned beef rolls squashed out of all… here, how did you know about the corned beef rolls? + +00:00:19.000 --> 00:00:25.000 + +[dialogue] I noticed them - or what remained of them - in the road. I noticed also that the lemon curd tart had sustained some superficial damage. + +00:00:25.000 --> 00:00:28.000 + +[dialogue] That's right. The curd had become… + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:31.000 + +[dialogue] Detached from the pastry base. + +00:00:31.000 --> 00:00:34.000 + +[dialogue] Absolutely right, yes. + +00:00:34.000 --> 00:00:39.000 + +[dialogue] Otherwise the contents of the sandwich box were relatively unharmed, although I detected small particles of bitumen in the chocolate kup kakes. + +00:00:39.000 --> 00:00:42.000 + +[dialogue] But they were wrapped in foil! + +00:00:42.000 --> 00:00:45.000 + +[dialogue] Not the hard chocolate top, I'm afraid. + +00:00:45.000 --> 00:00:47.500 + +[dialogue] Oh, that's the bit I like. + +00:00:47.500 --> 00:00:51.000 + +[dialogue] The sausage roll, the crisps and ginger bisquit were unscathed. + +00:00:51.000 --> 00:00:54.000 + +[dialogue] How do you know so much about cycling? + +00:00:54.000 --> 00:00:58.000 + +[dialogue] Well, I'm making a special study of accidents involving food. + +00:00:58.000 --> 00:01:00.000 + +[dialogue] Really? + +00:01:00.000 --> 00:01:06.000 + +[dialogue] In our laboratories, we have developed a cheese sandwich that can withstand an impact of 4,000 pounds per square inch. + +00:01:06.000 --> 00:01:08.000 + +[dialogue] Good heavens! + +00:01:08.000 --> 00:01:14.000 + +[dialogue] We have also developed a tomato which can eject itself when an accident is imminent. + +00:01:14.000 --> 00:01:17.000 + +[dialogue] Even if it's inside an egg and tomato roll? + +00:01:17.000 --> 00:01:24.000 + +[dialogue] Anywhere! Even if it's in your stomach… it will come up your throat and out of the window. Do you realise what this means? + +00:01:24.000 --> 00:01:26.000 + +[dialogue] Safer food? + +00:01:26.000 --> 00:01:38.000 + +[dialogue] Exactly! Snacks will be safer than ever! A pot of salad dressing, treated in our laboratories, has been hit by a 4,000 pound steam hammer every day for sixteen years and has it broken? + +00:01:38.000 --> 00:01:40.000 + +[dialogue] Er….well… + +00:01:40.000 --> 00:01:44.000 + +[dialogue] Yes, of course it has… but there are other ideas - safety straps for sardines, for instance. + +00:01:44.000 --> 00:01:48.000 +[action] A tomato leaps from glove compartment, hovers, then ejects out the window. + +00:01:48.000 --> 00:01:52.000 + +[dialogue] Here, that tomato just ejected itself. + +00:01:52.000 --> 00:01:57.000 + +[dialogue] Really? It works! It works! + +00:01:57.000 --> 00:02:00.000 +[action] The car crashes. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_34__The_Cycling_Tour/3_Clodagh_Rodgers.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_34__The_Cycling_Tour/3_Clodagh_Rodgers.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..5b895524 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_34__The_Cycling_Tour/3_Clodagh_Rodgers.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,155 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated placeholder timings. Includes stage directions and captions. Speakers identified where possible. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:05.000 +[action] Country road. Pither cycles with Gulliver on the back; Gulliver bandaged, moving rhythmically to distant 'Jack in a Box'. + +00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:13.000 + +[dialogue] [voice over] What a strange turn this cycling tour has taken. Mr Gulliver appears to have lost his memory and is now convinced that he is Clodagh Rogers… I am taking him for medical attention. + +00:00:13.000 --> 00:00:18.000 +[action] North Cornwall District Hospital reception; window lifts up and down. + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:20.000 + +[dialogue] Is this the Casualty Department? + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:22.000 + +[dialogue] Yes, that's right. + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:26.000 +[action] Bench collapses spilling patients; nurse hurries. Back to desk. + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:28.000 + +[dialogue] And what can I do for you? + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:31.000 +[action] Window drops on her fingers; she winces; pushes it up. + +00:00:31.000 --> 00:00:35.000 + +[dialogue] I am at present on a cycling tour of the North Cornwall area taking in Bude and… + +00:00:35.000 --> 00:00:37.000 + +[dialogue] Could I have your name please? + +00:00:37.000 --> 00:00:41.000 + +[dialogue] Ah, my name is Pither. + +00:00:41.000 --> 00:00:42.500 + +[dialogue] What? + +00:00:42.500 --> 00:00:48.000 + +[dialogue] P-I-T-H-E-R… as in Brotherhood, but with PI instead of the BRO and no HOOD. + +00:00:48.000 --> 00:00:49.500 + +[dialogue] I see… + +00:00:49.500 --> 00:00:52.000 + +[dialogue] I had just visited Taunton… + +00:00:52.000 --> 00:00:55.000 +[action] Terrific crash: trolley on side, bandaged patient under instruments. + +00:00:55.000 --> 00:00:56.500 + +[dialogue] Sh! + +00:00:56.500 --> 00:00:59.500 + +[dialogue] …and was cycling north towards… + +00:00:59.500 --> 00:01:02.000 + +[dialogue] Yes, where were you injured? + +00:01:02.000 --> 00:01:06.000 + +[dialogue] Just where the A397 Ilfracombe road meets the… + +00:01:06.000 --> 00:01:08.000 + +[dialogue] On your body… + +00:01:08.000 --> 00:01:12.000 + +[dialogue] Ah no… it's not I who was injured, it's my friend. + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:16.000 +[action] Nurse scowls, crumples paper, throws; glass cabinet topples and smashes. + +00:01:16.000 --> 00:01:18.000 + +[dialogue] Tut… Name? + +00:01:18.000 --> 00:01:19.500 + +[dialogue] Pither. + +00:01:19.500 --> 00:01:22.000 + +[dialogue] No, no, no, no. Your friend's name. + +00:01:22.000 --> 00:01:24.000 + +[dialogue] Oh, Clodagh Rogers… + +00:01:24.000 --> 00:01:26.000 + +[dialogue] Clodagh Rogers!? + +00:01:26.000 --> 00:01:29.000 + +[dialogue] Well only since about 4:30…. + +00:01:29.000 --> 00:01:33.000 + +[dialogue] Yes. I think you'd better talk to Doctor Wu… Doctor! + +00:01:33.000 --> 00:01:37.000 +[action] Doctor whips around, knocks off crate; elsewhere wheelchair collapses; window slams on nurse’s fingers. + +00:01:37.000 --> 00:01:38.500 + +[dialogue] Aaaaaagh! + +00:01:38.500 --> 00:01:41.000 +[action] Doctor limps over, in pain. + +00:01:41.000 --> 00:01:43.000 + +[dialogue] Now, what's the trouble? + +00:01:43.000 --> 00:01:45.500 + +[dialogue] I am on a cycling tour of… + +00:01:45.500 --> 00:01:47.000 + +[dialogue] He thinks he's had an accident. + +00:01:47.000 --> 00:01:51.000 + +[dialogue] I have a friend who, as a result of his injuries, thinks he is Clodagh Rogers. + +00:01:51.000 --> 00:01:52.500 + +[dialogue] He what? + +00:01:52.500 --> 00:01:55.000 + +[dialogue] Well, what happened was… + +00:01:55.000 --> 00:02:02.000 +[action] Nurse with tray collides with entering Gulliver; tray drops. Gulliver grabs Pither; they exit rapidly, stepping on doctor’s foot; window slams trapping doctor’s hand. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_34__The_Cycling_Tour/4_Trotsky.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_34__The_Cycling_Tour/4_Trotsky.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..7f7731c2 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_34__The_Cycling_Tour/4_Trotsky.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,161 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated placeholder timings. Includes stage directions and captions. Speakers identified where possible. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:07.000 +[action] Midnight forest clearing; camp fire. Pither writes diary; Gulliver enters, head bandaged. + +00:00:07.000 --> 00:00:15.000 + +[dialogue] [voice over] September 4th. We are now in the Alpes Maritimes region of Southern France. Clodagh seems intent on reaching Moscow… Oh hello! + +00:00:15.000 --> 00:00:19.000 + +[dialogue] We cannot stay here. We must leave immediately. There is a ship in Marseilles. + +00:00:19.000 --> 00:00:22.000 + +[dialogue] I did enjoy your song for Europe, Clodagh. + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:25.000 + +[dialogue] I have seen an agent in the town. My life is in danger. + +00:00:25.000 --> 00:00:27.500 + +[dialogue] Danger, Clodagh? + +00:00:27.500 --> 00:00:29.500 + +[dialogue] Stalin has always hated me. + +00:00:29.500 --> 00:00:32.000 + +[dialogue] No one hates you, Clodagh. + +00:00:32.000 --> 00:00:35.000 + +[dialogue] I will not let myself fall into the hands of these scum. + +00:00:35.000 --> 00:00:39.000 + +[dialogue] I think you should go and have a little lie down, my dear. Busy day tomorrow. + +00:00:39.000 --> 00:00:45.000 + +[dialogue] I. One of the founders of the greatest nation on earth. I! Whom Lenin has called his greatest friend. + +00:00:45.000 --> 00:00:48.000 +[action] French voices from the darkness. + +00:00:48.000 --> 00:00:50.500 + +[dialogue] Taisez-vous. Taisez-vous. + +00:00:50.500 --> 00:00:52.000 + +[dialogue] Oh dear. + +00:00:52.000 --> 00:00:56.000 + +[dialogue] I! Who have worked all my life that my people should live. + +00:00:56.000 --> 00:01:02.000 +[action] Middle-class French couple in pyjamas appear. + +00:01:02.000 --> 00:01:06.000 + +[dialogue] Qu'est-ce que le bruit? C'est impossible! + +00:01:06.000 --> 00:01:08.000 + +[dialogue] Er… my name is Pither. + +00:01:08.000 --> 00:01:10.000 + +[dialogue] Oh… you are English? + +00:01:10.000 --> 00:01:14.000 + +[dialogue] Er yes, that's right. I'm on a cycling tour of North Cornwall, taking in Bude… + +00:01:14.000 --> 00:01:18.000 + +[dialogue] I will not be defeated. I will return to my country to fight against this new tyranny! + +00:01:18.000 --> 00:01:21.000 + +[dialogue] This is Clodagh Rogers, the Irish-born girl singer. + +00:01:21.000 --> 00:01:29.000 + +[dialogue] Mais oui - c'est Clodagh Rogers - 'Jack-in-a-box'! [sings] I'm just a jack in a box, I know whenever love knocks… Genevieve! Gerard! + +00:01:29.000 --> 00:01:33.000 +[action] Two teenagers in pyjamas rush for autographs. + +00:01:33.000 --> 00:01:37.000 + +[dialogue] I will never surrender! I will never surrender! + +00:01:37.000 --> 00:01:45.000 + +[dialogue] Excusez-moi Madame Clodagh… Là, au-dessous de Denis Compton. Maman! Ce n'est pas la belle Clodagh. + +00:01:45.000 --> 00:01:46.500 + +[dialogue] Quoi? + +00:01:46.500 --> 00:01:49.000 + +[dialogue] C'est Trotsky le révolutionaire. + +00:01:49.000 --> 00:01:50.500 + +[dialogue] Trotsky! + +00:01:50.500 --> 00:01:53.000 + +[dialogue] Mais Trotsky ne chante pas. + +00:01:53.000 --> 00:01:55.000 + +[dialogue] Il chante un peu. + +00:01:55.000 --> 00:01:58.000 + +[dialogue] Mais pas professionalement. Qu'il pense de Lenin. + +00:01:58.000 --> 00:02:01.000 + +[dialogue] Ah! Lenin!! Quel chanteur: 'If I ruled the world'. + +00:02:01.000 --> 00:02:05.000 +[action] Brief film clip of Lenin singing. + +00:02:05.000 --> 00:02:07.000 + +[dialogue] Lenin. My friend. I come. + +00:02:07.000 --> 00:02:10.000 +[action] Gulliver dashes into forest. Pither pedals after him. + +00:02:10.000 --> 00:02:17.000 +[action] Quick cuts: Gulliver running through trees; Pither slower on bike. French couple snogging in car. + +00:02:17.000 --> 00:02:19.000 + +[dialogue] Lenin! I come! Lenin! + +00:02:19.000 --> 00:02:20.500 + +[dialogue] Je t'aime. + +00:02:20.500 --> 00:02:24.000 + +[dialogue] Maurice! Regardez! C'est la chanteuse anglaise Clodagh Rogers. + +00:02:24.000 --> 00:02:29.000 + +[dialogue] Ah mais oui! [sings] Jacques dans la boîte. [action] Car radio plays the song throughout the forest. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_34__The_Cycling_Tour/5_Smolensk.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_34__The_Cycling_Tour/5_Smolensk.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..1c5b7289 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_34__The_Cycling_Tour/5_Smolensk.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,94 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated placeholder timings. Includes stage directions and captions. Speakers identified where possible. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Russian street. Pither cycles with Trotsky-like Gulliver on the back. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:11.000 + +[dialogue] [voice over] After several days I succeeded in tracking down my friend Mr Gulliver on the outskirts of Smolensk. + +00:00:11.000 --> 00:00:16.000 +[action] Military man at map raps locations with a stick. + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:20.000 + +[dialogue] Smolensk. 200 miles east of Minsk. 200 north of Kursk. 1500 miles west of Omsk. + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:22.000 + +[dialogue] Thank you. + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:26.000 +[action] Signpost: 'Smolensk town centre 1/2, Tavistock 1612 miles'. + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:34.000 + +[dialogue] [voice over] As we were far from home… Gulliver tired from haranguing the masses all the way from Monte Carlo… + +00:00:34.000 --> 00:00:38.000 + +[dialogue] Monte Carlo. 100 miles south of Turin. 100 east of Pisa. 500 miles west of Bilbao. + +00:00:38.000 --> 00:00:42.000 + +[dialogue] Thank you. I decided to check… + +00:00:42.000 --> 00:00:45.000 + +[dialogue] [voice over] I decided to check… + +00:00:45.000 --> 00:00:47.000 + +[dialogue] No, sorry you go on. + +00:00:47.000 --> 00:00:52.000 + +[dialogue] [voice over] …check him into a hotel while I visited the British Embassy. + +00:00:52.000 --> 00:00:56.000 +[action] Door sign: 'YMACA.' They enter. + +00:00:56.000 --> 00:01:01.000 + +[dialogue] [voice over] And so we registered at the Smolensk Young Men's Anti-Christian Association. + +00:01:01.000 --> 00:01:05.000 + +[dialogue] YMACA. Corner of Anti-Semitic Street and Pogrom Square. + +00:01:05.000 --> 00:01:09.000 + +[dialogue] Go away. No, not you. A single room for my friend please. + +00:01:09.000 --> 00:01:12.000 + +[dialogue] Yes, sir. Bugged or unbugged? + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:15.000 + +[dialogue] I think I'd be happier with a bugged one. + +00:01:15.000 --> 00:01:18.000 + +[dialogue] Right, one bugged with bath. + +00:01:18.000 --> 00:01:21.000 + +[dialogue] Have a nice lie down, and I'll go to the Embassy. + +00:01:21.000 --> 00:01:25.000 +[action] Gulliver signs register. + +00:01:25.000 --> 00:01:28.000 + +[dialogue] Trotsky! My lack of God, it's Trotsky! + +00:01:28.000 --> 00:01:32.000 +[action] People race in excitedly. + +00:01:32.000 --> 00:01:36.000 + +[dialogue] Comrades. Socialism is not a… + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_34__The_Cycling_Tour/6_Bingo-crazed_Chinese.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_34__The_Cycling_Tour/6_Bingo-crazed_Chinese.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..17dc2fbd --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_34__The_Cycling_Tour/6_Bingo-crazed_Chinese.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,330 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated placeholder timings. Includes stage directions and captions. Speakers identified where possible. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:05.000 +[action] British Consulate exterior and interior; imperial music; picture of the Queen on wall. A Chinaman in Mandarin robes approaches. + +00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:08.000 + +[dialogue] Excuse me. Is this the British Consulate? + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:13.000 + +[dialogue] Yes yes… si si… that is correctment. Yes… Piccadilly Circus, mini-skirt and Joe Lyons. + +00:00:13.000 --> 00:00:16.000 + +[dialogue] I wish to see the consul, please. + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:19.000 + +[dialogue] Yes, yes, speakee speakee… me Blitish consul. + +00:00:19.000 --> 00:00:23.000 + +[dialogue] Oh! You are Rear Admiral Sir Dudley Compton? + +00:00:23.000 --> 00:00:28.000 + +[dialogue] No. He died… fell out of window onto exploding bomb… killed in a shooting accident. I'm his successor, Mr Atkinson. + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:30.000 + +[dialogue] Oh. + +00:00:30.000 --> 00:00:33.000 + +[dialogue] Would you like drinkee? Or game bingo? + +00:00:33.000 --> 00:00:36.000 + +[dialogue] Well…. A drink would be very nice. + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:39.000 +[action] Chinaman claps; another man runs in and bows. + +00:00:39.000 --> 00:00:42.000 + +[dialogue] Mr. Livingstone. Go and get sake. + +00:00:42.000 --> 00:00:44.000 + +[dialogue] Yes, Boss. + +00:00:44.000 --> 00:00:48.000 + +[dialogue] How is Tonblidge Wells? How I long to see again walls of famous Shakespeare-style theatre… + +00:00:48.000 --> 00:00:51.000 + +[dialogue] Oh well, I'm a West Country man myself, Mr. Atkinson. + +00:00:51.000 --> 00:00:53.000 + +[dialogue] Oh Texas - Arizona - Kit Carson Super Scout. + +00:00:53.000 --> 00:00:55.000 + +[dialogue] No. No. West of England… Cornwall. + +00:00:55.000 --> 00:00:59.000 + +[dialogue] Coron… worll… + +00:00:59.000 --> 00:01:01.000 + +[dialogue] Cornwall. + +00:01:01.000 --> 00:01:06.000 + +[dialogue] Coronworl… oh yes know Coronworl very well. Went to school there… belong many clubs in Coronworld. + +00:01:06.000 --> 00:01:09.000 +[action] Livingstone returns with sake and pastries. + +00:01:09.000 --> 00:01:13.000 + +[dialogue] Ah, Mr Livingstone thank you, sake and bakewells tart. Well, chaps, buttocks up! + +00:01:13.000 --> 00:01:15.000 + +[dialogue] Rather. + +00:01:15.000 --> 00:01:17.000 + +[dialogue] Now then er… er… + +00:01:17.000 --> 00:01:18.500 + +[dialogue] Ah, Pither. + +00:01:18.500 --> 00:01:22.000 + +[dialogue] We Blitish here in Smolensk velly intellested in cliket. + +00:01:22.000 --> 00:01:24.000 + +[dialogue] Oh, cricket? + +00:01:24.000 --> 00:01:28.000 + +[dialogue] No, no… not clicket - clicketty click… housey housey… bingo. + +00:01:28.000 --> 00:01:30.000 + +[dialogue] Bingo… + +00:01:30.000 --> 00:01:32.000 + +[dialogue] Oh bingo… bingo… bingo. + +00:01:32.000 --> 00:01:34.000 + +[dialogue] Bingo! Bingo! + +00:01:34.000 --> 00:01:40.000 +[action] Several Mao-suited Chinese rush in waving Red Books shouting 'bingo'. Chinaman calms them. + +00:01:40.000 --> 00:01:42.000 + +[dialogue] Hsai! Solly. Our boys got velly excited. + +00:01:42.000 --> 00:01:43.500 + +[dialogue] Bingo. + +00:01:43.500 --> 00:01:47.000 + +[dialogue] Shut face! Mr Pither, perhaps you could put in a good word so we could join a very smart bingo club in Coronworl. + +00:01:47.000 --> 00:01:49.000 + +[dialogue] Well, it's not really my line… + +00:01:49.000 --> 00:01:52.000 + +[dialogue] We all velly quiet at back, not say anything except shout 'Housey! Housey!' + +00:01:52.000 --> 00:01:54.000 + +[dialogue] Housey! Housey! + +00:01:54.000 --> 00:01:57.000 +[action] Maoists rush back in: 'Housey! Housey!' Cut to stock film of large Chinese crowds. + +00:01:57.000 --> 00:02:00.000 +[caption] Housey! Housey! Housey housey! + +00:02:00.000 --> 00:02:05.000 +[action] Back to Consulate. Chinaman shouts out window in Chinese; returns. + +00:02:05.000 --> 00:02:07.000 + +[dialogue] Nihi watai bingo cards? + +00:02:07.000 --> 00:02:08.500 + +[dialogue] Nihi watai! + +00:02:08.500 --> 00:02:10.000 + +[dialogue] Ah so… + +00:02:10.000 --> 00:02:14.000 + +[dialogue] Now then, Mr Pither, tell me which better - Hackney Star Bingo or St. Albans Top Rank Suite? + +00:02:14.000 --> 00:02:19.000 + +[dialogue] Well, I was hoping that you could help me and my friend to get back to England… we're on a cycling tour of North Cornwall… + +00:02:19.000 --> 00:02:23.000 +[caption] Bingo, bingo, bingo… + +00:02:23.000 --> 00:02:27.000 +[action] Chinaman ushers Pither out. Brief film of rioting Chinese chanting 'Bingo!'. + +00:02:27.000 --> 00:02:31.000 +[action] Hotel lobby. + +00:02:31.000 --> 00:02:34.000 + +[dialogue] Is Mr Trotsky in his room, please? + +00:02:34.000 --> 00:02:36.000 + +[dialogue] No. He has gone to Moscow. + +00:02:36.000 --> 00:02:39.000 +[action] Cut to military man. + +00:02:39.000 --> 00:02:41.000 + +[dialogue] Moscow. 1500 miles south of… + +00:02:41.000 --> 00:02:43.000 + +[dialogue] Shut up! + +00:02:43.000 --> 00:02:44.500 + +[dialogue] Moscow! + +00:02:44.500 --> 00:02:50.000 +[action] Three secret policemen surround Pither; identical suits, dark glasses, pork pie hats. + +00:02:50.000 --> 00:02:52.000 + +[dialogue] Come with us, please. + +00:02:52.000 --> 00:02:54.000 + +[dialogue] Oh, who are you? + +00:02:54.000 --> 00:02:56.000 + +[dialogue] Well we're not secret police anyway. + +00:02:56.000 --> 00:02:58.000 + +[dialogue] That's for sure. + +00:02:58.000 --> 00:03:01.000 + +[dialogue] If anything we are ordinary Soviet systems with no particular interest in politics. + +00:03:01.000 --> 00:03:03.000 + +[dialogue] None at all. Come with us. + +00:03:03.000 --> 00:03:05.000 + +[dialogue] Oh, where are you taking me? + +00:03:05.000 --> 00:03:09.000 +[action] The three confer aside. + +00:03:09.000 --> 00:03:12.000 + +[dialogue] What do we tell him? + +00:03:12.000 --> 00:03:15.000 + +[dialogue] Don't tell him any secrets. + +00:03:15.000 --> 00:03:17.000 + +[dialogue] Agreed. + +00:03:17.000 --> 00:03:21.000 + +[dialogue] Tell him anything except that we are taking him to Moscow where Trotsky is reunited with the Central Committee. + +00:03:21.000 --> 00:03:23.000 + +[dialogue] We're taking you to a clambake. + +00:03:23.000 --> 00:03:25.000 + +[dialogue] Oh a clambake! I've never been to one of those. + +00:03:25.000 --> 00:03:27.000 + +[dialogue] Right, let's go. + +00:03:27.000 --> 00:03:29.000 + +[dialogue] Who's giving the orders round here? + +00:03:29.000 --> 00:03:31.000 + +[dialogue] I am. I'm senior to you. + +00:03:31.000 --> 00:03:34.000 + +[dialogue] No, you're not. You're a greengrocer, I'm an insurance salesman. + +00:03:34.000 --> 00:03:36.000 + +[dialogue] Greengrocers are senior to insurance salesmen. + +00:03:36.000 --> 00:03:39.000 + +[dialogue] Cool it. I'm an ice-cream salesman and I am senior to both of you. + +00:03:39.000 --> 00:03:41.000 + +[dialogue] You're an ice-cream salesman? I thought you were a vetenarian. + +00:03:41.000 --> 00:03:43.000 + +[dialogue] I got promoted. Let's go. + +00:03:43.000 --> 00:03:45.000 + +[dialogue] Taxi! + +00:03:45.000 --> 00:03:47.000 +[action] A girl dressed as a New York cabbie enters. + +00:03:47.000 --> 00:03:48.500 + +[dialogue] Yes. + +00:03:48.500 --> 00:03:50.000 + +[dialogue] Drive us to Moscow. + +00:03:50.000 --> 00:03:52.000 + +[dialogue] I have no a cab. + +00:03:52.000 --> 00:03:54.000 + +[dialogue] Why not? + +00:03:54.000 --> 00:03:57.000 + +[dialogue] I'm in the Secret Police. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_34__The_Cycling_Tour/7_Russian_42nd_International_Clambake.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_34__The_Cycling_Tour/7_Russian_42nd_International_Clambake.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..69f166d7 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_34__The_Cycling_Tour/7_Russian_42nd_International_Clambake.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,299 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated placeholder timings. Includes stage directions and captions. Speakers identified where possible. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Stock film: train wheels in the night; siren sounds. Superimposed place names zoom: Petrograd, Ottograd, Lewgrad, Lesliegrad, Etceteragrad, Dukhovskoknabilebskohatsk, Moscva. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:12.000 +[action] Big Russian hall stage. Banner: 'Russian 42nd International Clambake'. Pither sits with bicycle; generals on dais. + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:16.000 + +[dialogue] …Dostoievye useye tovarich trotsky borodina… + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:18.000 +[caption] THIS IS THE MAN WHO BROUGHT OUR BELOVED TROTSKY BACK TO US + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:22.000 + +[dialogue] Beluntanks dretsky mihai ovna isky Mr Reg Pither. + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:24.000 +[caption] FIRST MAY I PRESENT MR PITHER FROM WEST OF ENGLAND + +00:00:24.000 --> 00:00:26.000 +[action] Pandemonium for about ten seconds. + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:29.000 + +[dialogue] Shi muska di scensand dravenka oblomov Engleska Solzhenitzhin. + +00:00:29.000 --> 00:00:31.000 +[caption] FORGIVE ME IF I CONTINUE IN ENGLISH IN ORDER TO SAVE TIME + +00:00:31.000 --> 00:00:38.000 + +[dialogue] And now, Comrades, welcome the return of one of Russia's greatest heroes… Lev Davidovich Trotsky! + +00:00:38.000 --> 00:00:42.000 +[action] Gulliver appears as Trotsky; uniform, beard, glasses. Pandemonium; he raises hands for silence. + +00:00:42.000 --> 00:00:50.000 + +[dialogue] Comrades. Bolsheviks. Friends of the Revolution. I have returned. The bloodstained shadow of Stalinist repression is past. I bring you new light of Permanent Revolution… + +00:00:50.000 --> 00:00:55.000 + +[dialogue] I may have been expelled in 1927, deported in 1929 but [sings] I'm just an old-fashioned girl, with an old-fashioned mind. + +00:00:55.000 --> 00:01:01.000 + +[dialogue] Comrades, I don't want to destroy to build… [sings] I want an old-fashioned house… and an old-fashioned millionaire. + +00:01:01.000 --> 00:01:05.000 +[action] Gulliver continues exactly as Eartha Kitt, with fur stole; confusion on stage. + +00:01:05.000 --> 00:01:09.000 + +[dialogue] [voice over] Our friend Mr Gulliver was clearly undergoing another change of personality. + +00:01:09.000 --> 00:01:13.000 +[action] Senior general appears beside Pither with two guards. + +00:01:13.000 --> 00:01:16.000 + +[dialogue] So! You have duped us. You shall pay for this. Guards, seize him. + +00:01:16.000 --> 00:01:20.000 +[action] Guards drag startled Pither away. Senior general confers: keep Gulliver; he's going down well. + +00:01:20.000 --> 00:01:23.000 + +[dialogue] He's more fun than he used to be. + +00:01:23.000 --> 00:01:25.500 + +[dialogue] He's loosened up a lot. This is an old Lenin number. + +00:01:25.500 --> 00:01:30.000 +[action] Cut to Pither sitting in a cell. + +00:01:30.000 --> 00:01:36.000 + +[dialogue] [voice over] April 26th. Thrown into Russian cell. Severely damaged my Mars bar. Shall I ever see Bude Bus station again? + +00:01:36.000 --> 00:01:40.000 +[action] Guards throw cell door open, grab him, march him out. + +00:01:40.000 --> 00:01:44.000 +[action] Exterior prison yard; Pither stood against pocked wall (firing squad holes). + +00:01:44.000 --> 00:01:47.000 + +[dialogue] [voice over] What a pleasant exercise yard. How friendly they were all being. + +00:01:47.000 --> 00:01:48.500 + +[dialogue] Cigarettes? + +00:01:48.500 --> 00:01:50.500 + +[dialogue] Oh, no thank you I don't smoke. + +00:01:50.500 --> 00:01:54.000 +[action] Firing squad lines up with rifles. + +00:01:54.000 --> 00:01:58.000 + +[dialogue] [voice over] I perceived a line of gentlemen with rifles… I looked around but could not see the target. + +00:01:58.000 --> 00:02:00.000 + +[dialogue] Blindfold? + +00:02:00.000 --> 00:02:02.000 + +[dialogue] No thank you, no. + +00:02:02.000 --> 00:02:08.000 + +[dialogue] Slowotny! Grydenka… Verschnitzen. + +00:02:08.000 --> 00:02:12.000 +[action] Drum roll. Messenger runs up with paper. + +00:02:12.000 --> 00:02:14.000 + +[dialogue] Nyet! Nyet! Nyet! + +00:02:14.000 --> 00:02:20.000 + +[dialogue] A telegram? From the Kremlin! It says… 'Carry on with the execution'. Verschnitzen… + +00:02:20.000 --> 00:02:24.000 + +[dialogue] [voice over] Now I was really for it. + +00:02:24.000 --> 00:02:29.000 +[action] Sword down; volley of shots. Officer looks; long pause. + +00:02:29.000 --> 00:02:31.000 + +[dialogue] How could you miss? + +00:02:31.000 --> 00:02:32.500 + +[dialogue] He moved. + +00:02:32.500 --> 00:02:36.000 + +[dialogue] Shut up! Go and practise. I'm so sorry. Do you mind waiting in your cell? + +00:02:36.000 --> 00:02:40.000 +[action] Pither flung back in cell; door slammed. + +00:02:40.000 --> 00:02:44.000 + +[dialogue] [voice over] What a stroke of luck. My Crunchie was totally intact. I settled down to a quick intermeal snack… + +00:02:44.000 --> 00:02:49.000 +[action] Bundled out again. Shots. Bundled in. Officer at door: 'Next time. Definitely!' + +00:02:49.000 --> 00:02:55.000 + +[dialogue] As I lay down to the sound of the Russian gentlemen practising their shooting, I realised I was in a bit of a pickle… + +00:02:55.000 --> 00:03:02.000 +[action] Mix to beautiful garden; sun, birds. Mother nudges Pither awake; pours iced fruit juice. + +00:03:02.000 --> 00:03:04.000 + +[dialogue] Come on, dear. Wake up dear. + +00:03:04.000 --> 00:03:05.500 + +[dialogue] Mother! + +00:03:05.500 --> 00:03:07.500 + +[dialogue] Come on dear. + +00:03:07.500 --> 00:03:10.000 + +[dialogue] So, it was all a dream. + +00:03:10.000 --> 00:03:13.000 + +[dialogue] No dear, this is the dream, you're still in the cell. + +00:03:13.000 --> 00:03:18.000 +[action] Mix to cell. Officer enters carrying a rifle. + +00:03:18.000 --> 00:03:22.000 + +[dialogue] OK, we're going to have another try. I think we've got it now. + +00:03:22.000 --> 00:03:25.000 + +[dialogue] Oh no, look, you've got to look down the bit there. + +00:03:25.000 --> 00:03:27.000 + +[dialogue] Oh I thought you had to look down that bit. + +00:03:27.000 --> 00:03:30.000 + +[dialogue] No, no, you've got to look down that bit, or you won't hit anything. + +00:03:30.000 --> 00:03:33.000 + +[dialogue] Alright, we'll give it a whirl. Guards, seize him. + +00:03:33.000 --> 00:03:36.000 + +[dialogue] Listen. You've got to look down this bit. + +00:03:36.000 --> 00:03:42.000 +[action] Poster on wall: 'Saturday Night at the Moscow Praesidium… Eartha Kitt, with Burgess and Maclean…' Mix to stock film of Kremlin. Laughter/applause dub. Band sings. + +00:03:42.000 --> 00:03:48.000 +[action] Stage: Marshall Bulganin with ventriloquist’s dummy bows and exits; curtain swings down. Compère enters, smiling. + +00:03:48.000 --> 00:03:50.000 + +[dialogue] Osledi Osledi. + +00:03:50.000 --> 00:03:55.000 +[action] Quick joke in Russian; roars with laughter; introduces next guest sincerely. + +00:03:55.000 --> 00:03:57.000 + +[dialogue] Eartha Kitt! + +00:03:57.000 --> 00:04:03.000 +[action] Gulliver enters in full Eartha Kitt rig; mimes to the voice of Edward Heath. + +00:04:03.000 --> 00:04:10.000 +[caption] Trade Union leaders - I would say this - we've done our part… + +00:04:10.000 --> 00:04:14.000 +[action] Audience unrest recognizing Heath; shout 'sing Old-Fashioned Girl' and throw vegetables. + +00:04:14.000 --> 00:04:17.000 +[action] Slow-motion tomato hits Gulliver; he holds a turnip. + +00:04:17.000 --> 00:04:21.000 + +[dialogue] That turnip's certainly not safe. Oh no! Mr Pither! Mr Pither! + +00:04:21.000 --> 00:04:24.000 +[action] Gulliver runs off-stage, pursued by guards. Stage door sign: 'Next week Clodagh Rogers'. + +00:04:24.000 --> 00:04:28.000 + +[dialogue] Mr Pither! Mr Pither! + +00:04:28.000 --> 00:04:33.000 +[action] Gulliver runs through dockyard; stops by high stone wall. + +00:04:33.000 --> 00:04:34.500 + +[dialogue] Mr Pither! + +00:04:34.500 --> 00:04:36.000 + +[dialogue] Here! + +00:04:36.000 --> 00:04:40.000 +[action] Gulliver climbs over wall; drops down to find Pither. + +00:04:40.000 --> 00:04:41.500 + +[dialogue] Gulliver. + +00:04:41.500 --> 00:04:44.000 + +[dialogue] Pither! What a stroke of luck. + +00:04:44.000 --> 00:04:46.000 + +[dialogue] Well yes and no. + +00:04:46.000 --> 00:04:50.000 +[action] Reveal: both stand before a firing squad. Squad charges with fixed bayonets. + +00:04:50.000 --> 00:04:52.000 +[caption] SCENE MISSING + +00:04:52.000 --> 00:04:58.000 +[action] Cornish country lane. Road sign 'Tavistock 12 miles'. Pither stands with Gulliver and bicycle. + +00:04:58.000 --> 00:05:02.000 + +[dialogue] Phew, what an amazing escape. Well goodbye, Reginald. + +00:05:02.000 --> 00:05:05.000 + +[dialogue] Goodbye, Mr Pither, and good luck with the tour! + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_34__The_Cycling_Tour/8_Jack_in_a_Box.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_34__The_Cycling_Tour/8_Jack_in_a_Box.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..4938c7db --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_34__The_Cycling_Tour/8_Jack_in_a_Box.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,33 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated placeholder timings. Includes stage directions and captions. Speakers identified where possible. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 +[action] Field with hedgerow; animated monster peeks over the hedge. + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:06.000 + +[dialogue] Hey, I think he's finally gone! + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:08.000 + +[dialogue] Ooh yes! + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:12.000 +[action] They hop over the fence into the field. + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:14.000 + +[dialogue] Ready, Maurice? + +00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:16.000 + +[dialogue] Right-ho, Kevin. Let's go. + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:18.000 + +[dialogue] All right, maestro, hit it! + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:26.000 +[action] Clodagh Rogers singing 'Jack in a Box' plays; the two monsters jump up and down enthusiastically; fade out. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_35_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/0_Episode35_head_tail.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_35_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/0_Episode35_head_tail.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..104e6dff --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_35_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/0_Episode35_head_tail.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,24 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Intro titles and end credits. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:05.000 +[action] Opening title appears: 'Episode Thirty-five' + +00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:12.000 +[action] Animated titles sequence. + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:16.000 + +[dialogue] It's… + +00:24:00.000 --> 00:24:20.000 +[action] Signature tune begins. Badger appears to read credits. + +00:24:20.000 --> 00:25:10.000 + +[dialogue] Hello… The BBC have offered me the sum of forty pence to read the credits of this show. Personally I thought they should have held out for the full seventy-five, but the BBC have explained to me about their financial difficulties and … er … I decided to accept the reduced offer… so … the show was conceived, written and performed by… the usual lot… Also appearing were Carol Cleveland, Marie Anderson, Mrs Idle, Make-up - Madelaine Gaffney, Costume - Hazel Pethig, Animations by Terry Gilliam, Visual Effects Designer - Bernard Wilkie, Graphics - Bob Blagden, Film Cameraman - Alan Featherstone, Film Editor - Ray Millichope, Sound - Richard Chubb, Lighting - Bill Bailey, Designer - Bob Berk, Produced by Ian MacNaughton for 92p and a bottle of Bells whisky … it was a BBC colour production. That's just it. I'd like to say if there are any BBC producers looking in who need people to read the credits for them, I would personally… + +00:25:10.000 --> 00:25:18.000 +[action] Camera reveals sixteen-ton weight poised above him; weight falls as picture fades. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_35_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/10_Bull-fighting.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_35_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/10_Bull-fighting.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..33dfeae4 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_35_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/10_Bull-fighting.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,11 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Skit starts at anchor #10. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:10.000 +[action] Bed springs up and folds into wall; underside reveals 'Probe' presenter set. + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:40.000 + +[dialogue] Many people in this country are becoming increasingly worried about bull-fighting. They say it's not only cruel, vicious and immoral, but also blatantly unfair. The bull is heavy, violent, abusive and aggressive with four legs and great sharp teeth, whereas the bull-fighter is only a small, greasy Spaniard. Given this basic inequality what can be done to make bull-fighting safer? We asked Brigadier Arthur Farquar-Smith, Chairman of the British Well-Basically Club. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_35_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/11_The_British_Well-Basically_Club.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_35_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/11_The_British_Well-Basically_Club.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..3b3e551d --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_35_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/11_The_British_Well-Basically_Club.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,15 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Skit starts at anchor #11. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Cut to brigadier. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:46.000 + +[dialogue] Well, basically it's quite apparent that these little dago chappies have got it all wrong. They prance round the bull like a lot of bally night club dancers looking like the Younger Generation or a less smooth version of the Lionel Blair Troupe, [action] getting rather camp [dialogue] with much of the staccato rhythms of the Irving Davies Dancers at the height of their success. In recent years Pan's People have often recaptured a lyricism … [action] huge hammer strikes him on the head; he becomes butch again [dialogue] and what we must do now is to use devices like radar to locate the bull and SAM missiles fired from underground silos, to knock the bull over. Then I would send in Scottish boys with air cover to provide a diversion for the bull, whilst the navy came in round the back and finished him off. That to me would be bull-fighting and not this pansy kind of lyrical, [action] getting camp [dialogue] evocative movement which George Balanchine and Martha Graham in the States and our very own Sadler's Wells … [action] hammer strikes again [dialogue] Troops could also be used in an auxiliary role in international chess, where… [action] lights go off [dialogue] What? … oh… + +00:00:46.000 --> 00:00:52.000 + +[dialogue] [voice over] I'll put the lights on again for a pound. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_35_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/12_Prices_on_the_planet_Algon.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_35_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/12_Prices_on_the_planet_Algon.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..fb9766ae --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_35_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/12_Prices_on_the_planet_Algon.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,91 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Skit starts at anchor #12. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:08.000 +[action] Animated sketch then to moonlike landscape; eerie sci-fi music. + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:40.000 + +[dialogue] This is the planet Algon, fifth world in the system of Aldebaran, the Red Giant in the constellation of Sagittarius. Here an ordinary cup of drinking chocolate costs four million pounds, an immersion heater for the hot-water tank costs over six billion pounds, and a pair of split-crotch panties would be almost unobtainable. [action] budget-day-style graphic of products and prices [dialogue] A simple rear window de-misting device for an 1100 costs eight thousand million billion pounds and a new element for an electric kettle like this would cost as much as the entire gross national product of the United States of America from 1770 to the year 2000, [action] graphic GNP [dialogue] and even then they wouldn't be able to afford the small fixing ring which attaches it to the kettle. [action] exploded kettle diagram; arrow to fixing ring. + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:52.000 +[action] Cut to James M'Burke studio with 'Algon I' motifs; expert by planet model; panel of dummy experts; single earphones. + +00:00:52.000 --> 00:01:18.000 + +[dialogue] Well, our computers have been working all day to analyse the dramatic information that's come in from this first ever intergalactic probe, Algon I … [action] suddenly excited, hears in earphone [dialogue] … and we're just getting an interesting development now, which is that attachments for rotary mowers - that is mowers that have a central circular blade - are… relatively inexpensive! Still in the region of nine to ten million pounds, but it does seem to indicate that Algon might be a very good planet for those with larger gardens … or perhaps even an orchard that's been left for two years, needs some heavy work, some weeding… [action] very indistinct pictures appear on screen behind [dialogue] But we're now getting some live pictures through from Algon! Harry - Perhaps you could talk us through them. + +00:01:18.000 --> 00:01:22.000 +[caption] LIVE FROM ALGON + +00:01:22.000 --> 00:01:34.000 +[action] Fuzzy landscape pictures; panning/tracking handheld. + +00:01:34.000 --> 00:01:50.000 + +[dialogue] [voice over] Very little evidence of shopping facilities here .. there don't seem to be any large supermarkets. There may be some on-the-corner grocery stores behind those rocks, but it's difficult to tell from this angle. It does seem to suggest that most of the shopping here is by direct mail. + +00:01:50.000 --> 00:01:54.000 +[caption] DIGESTIVE BISCUITS; £8,000,000 PER PACKET + +00:01:54.000 --> 00:02:06.000 +[action] Back to M'Burke. + +00:02:06.000 --> 00:02:20.000 + +[dialogue] Of course the big question that everyone's asking here is, what about those split-crotch parities? Are they going to be unobtainable throughout the Universe or merely on Algon itself? Professor? + +00:02:20.000 --> 00:02:26.000 +[caption] PROFESSOR HERMAN KHAN, DIRECTOR OF THE INSTITUTE OF SPLIT-CROTCH PANTIES + +00:02:26.000 --> 00:02:44.000 + +[dialogue] We must remember that Algon is over 75,000 miles wide. The probes come down to this area here and we're really only getting signals from a radius of only thirty or forty miles around the probe. Split-crotch panties, or indeed any items of what we scientists call, 'Sexy Underwear' or 'Erotic Lingerie' may be much more plentiful on other parts of the planet. + +00:02:44.000 --> 00:02:56.000 +[action] Camera pans to include M'Burke. + +00:02:56.000 --> 00:03:14.000 + +[dialogue] Professor, you were responsible for finding Scanty-Panties and Golden Goddess High-Lift Bras on planets which were never thought able to sustain life, and now that man has discovered a new galaxy do you think we're going to see underwear become even naughtier? + +00:03:14.000 --> 00:03:18.000 + +[dialogue] Oh naughtier and naughtier. + +00:03:18.000 --> 00:03:22.000 +[caption] NO BANANAS ON ALGON + +00:03:22.000 --> 00:03:44.000 + +[dialogue] Well so much for that … But of course, the probe itself has excited a great deal of interest… for it contains uranium-based dual transmission cells entirely re-charged by solar radiation, which can take off a bra and panties in less than fifteen seconds. It is, of course, the first piece of space hardware to be specially designed to undress ladies, and so there are bound to be some teething troubles … such as how to cope with the combination of elastic-sided boots and tights. + +00:03:44.000 --> 00:03:56.000 +[action] He produces bottom half of tailor's dummy wearing boots, tights, panties halfway down; indecipherable Algon pictures behind. + +00:03:56.000 --> 00:04:14.000 + +[dialogue] But I think we're getting some pictures now from Algon itself, and it looks as though … yes! The satellite has found a bird! The probe has struck crumpet and she looks pretty good too! Professor? + +00:04:14.000 --> 00:04:18.000 + +[dialogue] Ja - she's a real honey! + +00:04:18.000 --> 00:04:28.000 +[action] Screen shows blurred female figure. + +00:04:28.000 --> 00:04:42.000 + +[dialogue] Well the pictures are a bit sporadic… I think probably… the solar radiation during the long journey to Algon… [action] screen goes blank [dialogue] Hoy! Look! Oh dear, I'm sorry we've lost contact. We'll try and re-establish contact with Algon… + +00:04:42.000 --> 00:04:50.000 +[action] Cut to presenter's chair; Mr Badger appears at side. + +00:04:50.000 --> 00:05:30.000 + +[dialogue] Hello… The BBC have offered me the sum of forty pence to read the credits of this show. [action] sits [dialogue] Personally I thought they should have held out for the full seventy-five, but the BBC have explained to me about their financial difficulties and … er … I decided to accept the reduced offer… so … the show was conceived, written and performed by… the usual lot… [caption] signature tune is heard [dialogue] Also appearing were Carol Cleveland, Marie Anderson, Mrs Idle, Make-up - Madelaine Gaffney, Costume - Hazel Pethig, Animations by Terry Gilliam, Visual Effects Designer - Bernard Wilkie, Graphics - Bob Blagden, Film Cameraman - Alan Featherstone, Film Editor - Ray Millichope, Sound - Richard Chubb, Lighting - Bill Bailey, Designer - Bob Berk, Produced by Ian MacNaughton for 92p and a bottle of Bells whisky … it was a BBC colour production. That's just it. I'd like to say if there are any BBC producers looking in who need people to read the credits for them, I would personally… + +00:05:30.000 --> 00:05:36.000 +[action] Camera pulls out; sixteen-ton weight poised above; weight falls as picture fades. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_35_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/1_Bomb_on_plane.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_35_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/1_Bomb_on_plane.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..046f314e --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_35_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/1_Bomb_on_plane.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,117 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Skit starts at anchor #1. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Fade up on two pilots in the cockpit of an aeroplane; stewardess present. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:15.000 + +[dialogue] This is Captain MacPherson welcoming you aboard East Scottish Airways. You'll have had your tea. Our destination is Glasgow. There is no need to panic. + +00:00:15.000 --> 00:00:19.000 +[action] Cockpit door opens; Mr Badger enters. + +00:00:19.000 --> 00:00:26.000 + +[dialogue] There's a bomb on board this plane, and I'll tell you where it is for a thousand pounds. + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:30.000 + +[dialogue] I don't believe you. + +00:00:30.000 --> 00:00:40.000 + +[dialogue] If you don't tell me where the bomb is… if I don't give you the money… Unless you give me the bomb… + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:43.000 + +[dialogue] The money. + +00:00:43.000 --> 00:00:50.000 + +[dialogue] The money, thank you, pretty lady… the bomb will explode killing everybody. + +00:00:50.000 --> 00:00:54.000 + +[dialogue] Including you. + +00:00:54.000 --> 00:00:58.000 + +[dialogue] I'll tell you where it is for a pound. + +00:00:58.000 --> 00:01:02.000 + +[dialogue] Here's a pound. + +00:01:02.000 --> 00:01:08.000 + +[dialogue] I don't want Scottish money. They've got the numbers. It can be traced. + +00:01:08.000 --> 00:01:13.000 + +[dialogue] One English pound. Now where's the bomb? + +00:01:13.000 --> 00:01:16.000 + +[dialogue] I can't remember. + +00:01:16.000 --> 00:01:19.000 + +[dialogue] You've forgotten. + +00:01:19.000 --> 00:01:26.000 + +[dialogue] Aye, you'd better have your pound back. Oh… [action] rubs it [caption] fingerprints. + +00:01:26.000 --> 00:01:29.000 + +[dialogue] Now where's the bomb? + +00:01:29.000 --> 00:01:43.000 + +[dialogue] Ah, wait a tic, wait a tic. [action] closes eyes and thinks [dialogue] Er, my first is in Glasgow but not in Spain, my second is in steamer but not in train, my whole is in the luggage compartment on the plane… [action] opens eyes [dialogue] I'll tell you where the bomb is for a pound. + +00:01:43.000 --> 00:01:46.000 + +[dialogue] It's in the luggage compartment. + +00:01:46.000 --> 00:01:49.000 + +[dialogue] Right. Here's your pound.. + +00:01:49.000 --> 00:01:53.000 +[action] Enter a man with headphones. + +00:01:53.000 --> 00:01:57.000 + +[dialogue] Is this character giving you any trouble? + +00:01:57.000 --> 00:02:01.000 + +[dialogue] He's just ruined this sketch. + +00:02:01.000 --> 00:02:04.000 + +[dialogue] Yes, absolutely. + +00:02:04.000 --> 00:02:08.000 + +[dialogue] Let's go on to the next one. + +00:02:08.000 --> 00:02:14.000 + +[dialogue] Wait a tic, wait a tic. No. I won't ruin your sketch for a pound. + +00:02:14.000 --> 00:02:15.500 + +[dialogue] No, no. + +00:02:15.500 --> 00:02:18.000 + +[dialogue] 75p. + +00:02:18.000 --> 00:02:22.000 + +[dialogue] Next item. [action] they start to leave + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_35_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/2_A_naked_man.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_35_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/2_A_naked_man.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..d54ed20a --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_35_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/2_A_naked_man.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,28 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Skit starts at anchor #2. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:10.000 +[action] Nude organist seated outdoors with scarlet dressing gown marked 'Nude Organist'; make-up and photos ongoing. + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:26.000 + +[dialogue] Well I see my role in it as, er, how can I put it best - the nude man - as sort of symbolizing the two separate strands of existence, the essential nudity of man… + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:34.000 +[action] They realize they are on camera; robe removed; set cleared; he grins and plays chords. + +00:00:34.000 --> 00:00:50.000 +[action] Cut to announcer at desk in a field, talking to trendy girl reporter. + +00:00:50.000 --> 00:01:09.000 + +[dialogue] It's an interesting question. Personally I rather adhere to the Bergsonian idea of laughter as a social sanction against inflexible behaviour but… excuse me a moment… And now… + +00:01:09.000 --> 00:01:11.000 + +[dialogue] It's… + +00:01:11.000 --> 00:01:18.000 +[action] Animated titles. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_35_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/3_Ten_seconds_of_sex.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_35_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/3_Ten_seconds_of_sex.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..fe3a6362 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_35_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/3_Ten_seconds_of_sex.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,20 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Skit starts at anchor #3. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 +[caption] AND NOW THE TEN SECONDS OF SEX + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:14.000 +[action] Black screen; ticking clock for ten seconds. + +00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:18.000 +[caption] ALL RIGHT, YOU CAN STOP NOW + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:24.000 +[action] Cut to little palm court set; a man seated. + +00:00:24.000 --> 00:00:34.000 + +[dialogue] Well, we'll be continuing with 'Monty Python's Flying Circus' in just a moment [action] consults his watch [dialogue] fr…o…m nnnnnnnnnnnn…now. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_35_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/4_Housing_project_built_by_characters_from_nineteenth-century_English_literature.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_35_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/4_Housing_project_built_by_characters_from_nineteenth-century_English_literature.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..6901ad73 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_35_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/4_Housing_project_built_by_characters_from_nineteenth-century_English_literature.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,29 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Skit starts at anchor #4. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Cut to a building site; camera pans over it. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:28.000 + +[dialogue] This new housing development in Bristol is one of the most interesting in the country. It's using a variety of new techniques: shock-proof curtain-walling, a central high voltage, self-generated electricity source, and extruded acrylic fiberglass fitments. It's also the first major housing project in Britain to be built entirely by characters from nineteenth-century English literature. + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:44.000 +[action] Pan rests on site: crinolined ladies, Bob Cratchett, Heathcliff & Catherine, Nelson, Mr Beadle at cement mixer. Interior of half-finished shell; Little Nell atop ladder. + +00:00:44.000 --> 00:01:14.000 + +[dialogue] Here Little Nell, from Dickens's 'Old Curiosity Shop' fits new nylon syphons into the asbestos-lined ceilings … [action] complicated electrical wiring shown [dialogue] But it's the electrical system which has attracted the most attention. [action] Cut to Arthur Huntingdon studying a plan, wearing builder's helmet [dialogue] Arthur Huntingdon, who Helen Graham married as a young girl, and whose shameless conduct eventually drove her back to her brother Lawrence, in Anne Brontë's 'The Tenant of Wildfell Hall' describes why it's unique. + +00:01:14.000 --> 00:01:27.000 + +[dialogue] Because sir, it is self-generating. Because we have harnessed here in this box the very forces of life itself. The very forces that will send Helen running back to beg forgiveness! + +00:01:27.000 --> 00:01:40.000 +[action] Close-up of prefabricated slabs hoisted by crane; pull out to reveal farmhands. + +00:01:40.000 --> 00:01:56.000 + +[dialogue] The on-site building techniques involve the construction of twelve-foot walling blocks by a crowd of farmhands from 'Tess of the D'Urbervilles' supervised by the genial landlady, Mrs Jupp, from Samuel Butler's 'Way of All Flesh'. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_35_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/5_M1_interchange_built_by_characters_from_'Paradise_Lost'.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_35_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/5_M1_interchange_built_by_characters_from_'Paradise_Lost'.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..d77b5637 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_35_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/5_M1_interchange_built_by_characters_from_'Paradise_Lost'.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,25 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Skit starts at anchor #5. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:08.000 +[action] Narrator on site with stick-mike in front of massive motorway interchange; angels, devils, Adam and Eve working behind. + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:22.000 + +[dialogue] In contrast to the site in Bristol, it's progress here on Britain's first eighteen-level motorway interchange being built by characters from Milton's 'Paradise Lost'… + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:26.000 +[action] Camera zooms past narrator into angels and others. + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:30.000 + +[dialogue] [voice over] What went wrong here? + +00:00:30.000 --> 00:00:36.000 +[action] Cut to foreman in donkey jacket and helmet. + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:54.000 + +[dialogue] Well, no one really got on. Satan didn't get on with Eve … er… Archangel Gabriel didn't get on with Satan… nobody got on with the Serpent, so now they have to work a rota: forces of good from ten till three, forces of evil three to six. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_35_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/6_Mystico_and_Janet_-_flats_built_by_hypnosis.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_35_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/6_Mystico_and_Janet_-_flats_built_by_hypnosis.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..8803770b --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_35_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/6_Mystico_and_Janet_-_flats_built_by_hypnosis.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,92 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Skit starts at anchor #6. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Camera tracks through high-rise development area. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:22.000 + +[dialogue] But even more modern building techniques are being used on an expanding new town site near Peterborough; here the Amazing Mystico and Janet can put up a block of flats by hypnosis in under a minute. + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:34.000 +[action] Mystico removes cloak, gloves, top hat; hands to Janet (curtsies). Mystico makes passes. [action] Reversed stock film of flats leaping up. Return to Mystico and Janet; they head to a little Austin 30. + +00:00:34.000 --> 00:00:52.000 + +[dialogue] The local Council here have over fifty hypnosis-induced twenty-five story blocks, put up by El Mystico and Janet. I asked Mr Ken Verybigliar the advantages of hypnosis compared to other building methods. + +00:00:52.000 --> 00:00:55.000 +[caption] MR K. V. B. LIAR + +00:00:55.000 --> 00:01:15.000 + +[dialogue] Well there is a considerable financial advantage in using the services of El Mystico. A block, like Mystico Point here, [action] indicating high-rise behind him [dialogue] would normally cost in the region of one-and-a-half million pounds. This was put up for five pounds and thirty bob for Janet. + +00:01:15.000 --> 00:01:22.000 + +[dialogue] But the obvious question is are they safe? + +00:01:22.000 --> 00:01:28.000 +[caption] MR CLEMENT ONAN, ARCHITECT TO THE COUNCIL + +00:01:28.000 --> 00:01:42.000 + +[dialogue] Of course they're safe. There's absolutely no doubt about that. They are as strong, solid and as safe as any other building method in this country provided of course people believe in them. + +00:01:42.000 --> 00:01:48.000 +[action] Cut to a council flat. Picture of Mystico on wall. + +00:01:48.000 --> 00:01:57.000 + +[dialogue] Yes, we received a note from the Council saying that if we ceased to believe in this building it would fall down. + +00:01:57.000 --> 00:02:03.000 + +[dialogue] You don't mind living in a figment of another man's imagination? + +00:02:03.000 --> 00:02:08.000 + +[dialogue] No, it's much better than where we used to live. + +00:02:08.000 --> 00:02:12.000 + +[dialogue] Where did you used to live? + +00:02:12.000 --> 00:02:18.000 + +[dialogue] We had an eighteen-roomed villa overlooking Nice. + +00:02:18.000 --> 00:02:22.000 + +[dialogue] Really, that sounds much better. + +00:02:22.000 --> 00:02:26.000 + +[dialogue] Oh yes - yes you're right. + +00:02:26.000 --> 00:02:32.000 +[action] Stock shot of block falling in slow motion; interior shakes; then rights itself. + +00:02:32.000 --> 00:02:35.000 + +[dialogue] No, no, no, of course not. + +00:02:35.000 --> 00:02:38.000 + +[dialogue] Phew, that was close. + +00:02:38.000 --> 00:02:56.000 +[action] Tracking shot: El Mystico strides among towering blocks; cloak swirls. + +00:02:56.000 --> 00:03:36.000 + +[dialogue] But the construction of these vast new housing developments, providing homes for many thousands of people, is not the only project to which he has applied his many talents. He also has an Infallible Pools Method, a School of Spanish Dancing and a Car Hire Service. [action] Mystico driving Austin 30, eyes riveted; Janet tactfully guides wheel [dialogue] What is the driving force behind a man of such restless energies, and boundless vision? Here as with so many great men of history, the answer lies in a woman… [action] Zoom to Janet; montage to Antony and Cleopatra; Napoleon and Josephine; Janet in negligée [dialogue] As Antony has his Cleopatra… as Napoleon has his Josephine… So Mystico has his Janet. + +00:03:36.000 --> 00:03:46.000 +[action] Mystico leaps from wardrobe onto bed with lusty yell; montage of Janet stage poses. + +00:03:46.000 --> 00:04:40.000 + +[dialogue] Yes. Janet … a quiet, shy girl. An honours graduate from Harvard University, American junior sprint record holder, ex-world skating champion, Nobel Prize winner, architect, novelist and surgeon. The girl who helped crack the Oppenheimer spy ring in 1947. She gave vital evidence to the Senate Narcotics Commission in 1958. She also helped to convict the woman at the chemist's in 1961, and a year later [action] Janet shakes hands with police commissioner [dialogue] she gave police information which led to the arrest of her postman. In October of that same year [action] photo with judge and policeman [dialogue] she secured the conviction of her gardener for bigamy and three months later personally led the police swoop [action] street scene; policemen cluster; two people covered with blankets [dialogue] on the couple next door. In 1967 she became suspicious of the man at the garage [action] petrol attendant filling car; kiosk shot [dialogue] and it was her dogged perseverance and relentless enquiries that two years later finally secured his conviction for not having a licence for his car radio. [action] photo with man in handcuffs [dialogue] He was hanged at Leeds a year later [action] Janet posing outside prison [dialogue] despite the abolition of capital punishment and the public outcry. Also in Leeds that year, a local butcher was hanged [action] blurred family snap [dialogue] for defaulting on mortgage repayments, and a Mr Jarvis [action] photo [dialogue] was electrocuted for shouting in the corridor. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_35_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/7_'Mortuary_Hour'.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_35_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/7_'Mortuary_Hour'.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..c61de9c1 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_35_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/7_'Mortuary_Hour'.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,198 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Skit starts at anchor #7. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:05.000 +[caption] SUPER: SUPERINTENDENT HARRY "BOOT-IN" SWALK + +00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:26.000 + +[dialogue] We admit that there have been outbreaks of hanging recently, but the police are trying to keep the situatuon under control. [action] personal two-way radio making noise [dialogue] You must remember the courts are very busy at the moment and the odd death sentence is bound to slip through. [action] claps hand over radio [dialogue] Electrocutions are another big worry. But we hope that guillotining has been eradicated from the urban areas. and garrotting is confined almost entirely to Luton. So if you have a friend in prison or under the sentence of death, be sure to let us know at this address. + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:32.000 +[caption] THE POLICE FORCE, "SUNNYVIEW", YEOVIL, SOMERSET + +00:00:32.000 --> 00:00:42.000 +[action] Cut to mortuary. Corpses under sheets; two workers with tea shelling eggs into pickling jar; transistor radio. + +00:00:42.000 --> 00:00:56.000 + +[dialogue] … and Premier Chou En Lai, who called it 'a major breakthrough'. Twelve men were accidentally hanged at Whitby Assizes this afternoon whilst considering their verdict. This is one of the worst miscarriages of justice in Britain since Tuesday. [caption] music + +00:00:56.000 --> 00:01:18.000 + +[dialogue] Well it's thirteen minutes to the hour of nine-nine-nine, here on wonderful Radio One-One-One! So if you're still lying in your big big bed, now is the time to get up out of it! We've got another thirteen hours of tip-top sounds here on Wonderful Radio One! [caption] brief funny noises [dialogue] Sorry about that … So unless you have brain cells, or have completed the process of evolution, there's a wonderful day ahead! + +00:01:18.000 --> 00:01:36.000 + +[dialogue] [action] switching the radio off [dialogue] It must be on Radio Four. [action] gets another radio [dialogue] Radio Two. [action] gets another radio [dialogue] … Three … [action] opens third radio, takes out a fourth; switches on. + +00:01:36.000 --> 00:01:46.000 + +[dialogue] It's 9 o'clock and time for 'Mortuary Hour'. An hour of talks, tunes and downright tomfoolery for all those who work in mortuaries, introduced as usual by Shirley Bassey. [caption] sinister chords + +00:01:46.000 --> 00:01:54.000 + +[dialogue] Well, we're going to kick straight off this week with our Mortuary Quiz, so have your pens and pencils ready. + +00:01:54.000 --> 00:02:00.000 +[action] Door opens; Mr Wang, Department of Stiffs official, enters in undertaker suit, top hat, long blond wig. + +00:02:00.000 --> 00:02:04.000 + +[dialogue] Turn that radio off and look lively! + +00:02:04.000 --> 00:02:08.000 + +[dialogue] Oh, it's 'Mortuary Quiz', Mr Wang… + +00:02:08.000 --> 00:02:10.000 + +[dialogue] Don't argue, Battersby. + +00:02:10.000 --> 00:02:22.000 +[action] Voices off; officials at door at attention. Enter a Mayor and an elderly peer on a small platform pushed by attendant. + +00:02:22.000 --> 00:02:26.000 + +[dialogue] … This is our mortuary in here, Your Grace … + +00:02:26.000 --> 00:02:34.000 + +[dialogue] I see, I see, I … er … I … er … I … er … I … I can't think of anything to say about it. + +00:02:34.000 --> 00:02:40.000 + +[dialogue] Well, we're very proud of it here, sir. It's one of the most up to date in the country. + +00:02:40.000 --> 00:02:48.000 + +[dialogue] I see… yes… yes … now… um… what… what… ah… ah… what is it? …. is it a power station? + +00:02:48.000 --> 00:02:52.000 + +[dialogue] No, Your Grace, it's a mortuary. + +00:02:52.000 --> 00:02:56.000 + +[dialogue] I see … I see … good … good … good, good, good… + +00:02:56.000 --> 00:03:04.000 + +[dialogue] But it has one of the most advanced thermostat control systems in the country, and it has computer-controlled storage facilities. + +00:03:04.000 --> 00:03:10.000 + +[dialogue] I see, I see … I … er… er… er… er … I … er … I'm a good little doggie. + +00:03:10.000 --> 00:03:13.000 + +[dialogue] I'm sorry, Your Grace? + +00:03:13.000 --> 00:03:16.000 + +[dialogue] I'm a good little dog. + +00:03:16.000 --> 00:03:18.000 + +[dialogue] Oh dear… + +00:03:18.000 --> 00:03:22.000 + +[dialogue] Perhaps we should postpone the visit? + +00:03:22.000 --> 00:03:36.000 + +[dialogue] No, no, no - you see it's just that his brain is so tiny that the slightest movement can dislodge it [action] Attendant slaps duke's head gently side to side [dialogue] Your Grace … Oh dear… it's rather like one of those games you play where you have to get the ball into the hole … That's it. + +00:03:36.000 --> 00:03:44.000 + +[dialogue] Ah! Now then, excellent, excellent, excellent, excellent. Now then … ah … what happens when the steel is poured into the ingots? + +00:03:44.000 --> 00:03:50.000 + +[dialogue] [action] ushering everyone out [dialogue] Perhaps we should go and have a look at the new showers? + +00:03:50.000 --> 00:03:56.000 + +[dialogue] Yes… yes … yes … yes… yes rather jolly good… jolly good .. jolly good … jolly good … no fear… + +00:03:56.000 --> 00:04:00.000 +[action] They leave; Battersby turns radio on again. + +00:04:00.000 --> 00:04:10.000 + +[dialogue] Well the answers were as follows: 1) the left hand, 2) no, 3) normal, 4) yes it has, in 1963 when a bird got caught in the mechanism. How did you get on? + +00:04:10.000 --> 00:04:16.000 +[action] Two men push in trolley with covered corpses. + +00:04:16.000 --> 00:04:19.000 + +[dialogue] Turn that thing off! + +00:04:19.000 --> 00:04:22.000 + +[dialogue] Oh! It's 'Mortuary Dance Time', Mr Wang! + +00:04:22.000 --> 00:04:30.000 + +[dialogue] Never mind that, Battersby, this is the big one. I've just had Whitby Police on the phone with twelve hangees… + +00:04:30.000 --> 00:04:34.000 + +[dialogue] Oh yes, I just heard about that on the radios … + +00:04:34.000 --> 00:04:38.000 + +[dialogue] No, these are twelve different ones … so shtoom. + +00:04:38.000 --> 00:04:48.000 +[action] Staff gather round body; working efficiently. Badger is suddenly seen among them. + +00:04:48.000 --> 00:04:53.000 + +[dialogue] I'll not interrupt this sketch for a pound. + +00:04:53.000 --> 00:04:54.500 + +[dialogue] What? + +00:04:54.500 --> 00:04:59.000 + +[dialogue] For one pound I'll leave this sketch totally uninterrupted. + +00:04:59.000 --> 00:05:00.500 + +[dialogue] What? + +00:05:00.500 --> 00:05:10.000 + +[dialogue] Fifty pence … I'm prepared to negotiate a forty-pence deal. [action] an eye peers from under sheet on corpse [dialogue] For 35p I won't interrupt any of the next three items. + +00:05:10.000 --> 00:05:18.000 +[action] Corpse sits up; another corpse sits; sheet pulled back reveals boy and girl sharing stretcher; they light cigarettes. + +00:05:18.000 --> 00:05:21.000 + +[dialogue] No, no, it's no good… + +00:05:21.000 --> 00:05:23.000 + +[dialogue] 25p. + +00:05:23.000 --> 00:05:24.500 + +[dialogue] No. + +00:05:24.500 --> 00:05:27.000 + +[dialogue] 10p and a kiss. + +00:05:27.000 --> 00:05:34.000 +[action] ANIMATION begins; Gilliam's hands in shot. + +00:05:34.000 --> 00:05:46.000 + +[dialogue] [voice over] You see, it's very simple - I just take these cut-out figures and by putting them together… oh, you mean we're on?… [action] Gilliam's head appears briefly [dialogue] Sorry. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_35_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/8_The_Olympic_hide-and-seek_final.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_35_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/8_The_Olympic_hide-and-seek_final.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..2010e4e3 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_35_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/8_The_Olympic_hide-and-seek_final.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,115 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Skit starts at anchor #8. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Animated sketch starts; cut to Trafalgar Square; Olympic symbol superimposed. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:10.000 +[caption] FINAL OF THE HIDE-AND-SEEK SECOND LEG + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:18.000 +[action] Zoom on commentator and two finalists limbering up. + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:01:02.000 + +[dialogue] Hello, good afternoon and welcome to the second leg of the Olympic final of the men's Hide-and-Seek here in the heart of Britain's London. We'll be starting in just a couple of moments from now, and there you can see the two competitors Francisco Huron the Paraguayan, who in this leg is the seeker [action] Francisco darts about looking [dialogue] and there's the man he'll be looking for … [action] Don Roberts practises hiding [dialogue] our own Don Roberts from Hinckley in Leicestershire who, his trainer tells me, is at the height of his self-secreting form. And now in the first leg, which ended on Wednesday, Don succeeded in finding the Paraguayan in the new world record time of 11 years, 2 months, 26 days, 9 hours, 3 minutes, 27.4 seconds, in a sweetshop in Kilmarnock. And now they're under starter's orders. + +00:01:02.000 --> 00:01:08.000 +[action] Don and Francisco poised; starter voice cues. + +00:01:08.000 --> 00:01:20.000 +[action] Gun fires; Francisco covers eyes and counts. + +00:01:08.000 --> 00:01:20.000 + +[dialogue] Uno, dos, tres, quattro, cinque, seis, siete, ocho, nueve, diez … + +00:01:20.000 --> 00:01:26.000 +[action] Don hails a cab and leaves. + +00:01:20.000 --> 00:01:28.000 + +[dialogue] … trientay dos, trientay tres, trientay quattro… + +00:01:28.000 --> 00:01:31.000 +[caption] 32, 33, 34 + +00:01:31.000 --> 00:01:42.000 + +[dialogue] Well Don's off to a really great start there. Remember the Paraguayan has got 11 years, 2 months, 26 days, 9 hours… [action] taxi heads to London airport [dialogue] 3 minutes, 27.4 seconds to beat. + +00:01:42.000 --> 00:01:46.000 +[caption] 998, 999, 1000 + +00:01:46.000 --> 00:01:56.000 + +[dialogue] Neuvecian no nuevetay ocho, nuevecientas nuevente ye nueve, mil. [action] removes hands [dialogue] Coming! + +00:01:56.000 --> 00:02:24.000 +[action] Francisco searches locally; plane lands with 'Benvenuto a Sardinia'; Don cycles, runs, hides behind pillar in castle; Francisco searches Tottenham Court Road; cut to Sportsview desk. + +00:02:24.000 --> 00:02:30.000 + +[dialogue] Well, we'll be taking you back there as soon as there are any developments. + +00:02:30.000 --> 00:02:33.000 +[caption] SIX YEARS LATER + +00:02:33.000 --> 00:02:38.000 +[action] Frank Bough older. + +00:02:38.000 --> 00:02:44.000 + +[dialogue] We've just heard that something is happening in the Hide-and-Seek final, so let's go straight over there. + +00:02:44.000 --> 00:03:06.000 + +[dialogue] Hello again, and welcome to Madagascar, where Francisco Huron is seeking Don Roberts. And I've just been told that he has been told that he has been unofficially described as 'cold'. Ah, wait a minute. [action] Huron consults official; commentator steps off then returns [dialogue] I've just been told that Huron has requested a plane ticket for Budapest! So he's definitely getting warmer. So we'll be back again in just a few years. + +00:03:06.000 --> 00:03:10.000 +[action] Frank Bough older and covered in cobwebs. + +00:03:10.000 --> 00:03:14.000 + +[dialogue] Really beginning to hot up now. + +00:03:14.000 --> 00:03:18.000 +[caption] FIVE YEARS, TWO MONTBS AND TWENTY-SIX DAYS LATER + +00:03:18.000 --> 00:03:40.000 + +[dialogue] So here we are on the very last day of this fantastic final. Huron now has less than twelve hours left to find British ace Don Roberts. Early this morning he finished combing the outskirts of Lisbon and now he seems to have staked everything on one final desperate seek here in the Tagus valley. But Roberts is over fifteen hundred miles away, and it's beginning to look all over, bar the shouting. The sands of time are running out for this delving dago, this savior of seek, perspicacious Paraguayan. He's still desperately cold and it's beginning to look like another gold for Britain. + +00:03:40.000 --> 00:04:20.000 +[action] Huron checks dustbin; finds sardine tin; realizes 'Sardines'—idea! Taxi; plane to Sardinia; cycles, runs into castle; finds Don behind pillar; await result; blazered official announces. + +00:04:20.000 --> 00:04:34.000 + +[dialogue] The official result of the World Hide-and-Seek, Mr Don Roberts from Hinckley, Leicestershire, 11 years, 2 months, 26 days, 9 hours, 3 minutes, 27 seconds. Mr Francisco Huron, Paraguay, 11 years, a months, 26 days, 9 hours, 3 minutes, 27 seconds. The result - a tie. + +00:04:34.000 --> 00:04:40.000 + +[dialogue] A tie! Well what a fantastic result. Well the replay will start tomorrow at 7.30 a.m. + +00:04:40.000 --> 00:04:54.000 +[action] Camera pans from competitors to window; zooms through to beach; Redcoat appears. + +00:04:54.000 --> 00:05:06.000 + +[dialogue] Well hello again …. nice to be back … glad to see the series has been doing well. Well now, sorry about Mon-trerx. + +00:05:06.000 --> 00:05:12.000 +[action] Two men run past carrying a donkey; third man with 'Donkey Rides' sign winks and points. + +00:05:12.000 --> 00:05:34.000 + +[dialogue] That was a little item entitled Hide-and-Seek - very anarchic, very effective, not quite my cup of tea, but very nice for the younger people. Well, the next item the boys have put together takes place in a sitting room. Sorry it's just a sitting room, but the bank account's a bit low after the appallingly expensive production of 'Clochmerle'… + +00:05:34.000 --> 00:05:40.000 +[action] Mr Robinson hits Redcoat with a chicken; Robinson walks; camera follows past Badger. + +00:05:40.000 --> 00:05:46.000 + +[dialogue] This is a totally free interruption and no money has exchanged hands whatever. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_35_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/9_The_Cheap-Laughs.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_35_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/9_The_Cheap-Laughs.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..cec3266f --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_35_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/9_The_Cheap-Laughs.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,133 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Skit starts at anchor #9. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:10.000 +[action] Camera pans with Robinson to knight in armour; chicken handed; mix to modern sitting room; Mrs Robinson eating; clock. + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:14.000 + +[dialogue] Sorry about that, darling… + +00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:18.000 +[action] She serves vegetables; he unfolds napkin. + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:20.000 + +[dialogue] Gravy? + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:22.000 + +[dialogue] Yes please, dear. + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:30.000 +[action] They eat in silence; doorbell rings (various chimes). + +00:00:30.000 --> 00:00:34.000 + +[dialogue] Oh dear, that'll be the Cheap-Laughs from next door. + +00:00:34.000 --> 00:00:42.000 +[action] Front door opens; Mr & Mrs Cheap-Laugh enter: him in floppy comedian suit, bow tie, fright wig; her garish. + +00:00:42.000 --> 00:00:44.000 + +[dialogue] Come in. + +00:00:44.000 --> 00:00:47.000 + +[dialogue] No! Just breathing heavily! + +00:00:47.000 --> 00:00:56.000 +[action] He slips and falls; wife pies his face; roars of laughter. + +00:00:56.000 --> 00:01:00.000 + +[dialogue] Oh we just dropped in. + +00:01:00.000 --> 00:01:04.000 + +[dialogue] Would you like to come through… + +00:01:04.000 --> 00:01:12.000 +[action] Exterior of house at night; shrieks of laughter; crockery crashes; donkey gag runs past. + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:15.000 +[caption] ONE EVENING WITH THE CHEAP-LAUGHS LATER + +00:01:15.000 --> 00:01:22.000 +[action] Hall light on; at front door. + +00:01:22.000 --> 00:01:28.000 + +[dialogue] Well goodnight and give us a kiss. [action] kisses Mrs Robinson + +00:01:28.000 --> 00:01:32.000 + +[dialogue] Oh thank you very much for a very nice evening. + +00:01:32.000 --> 00:01:35.000 + +[dialogue] After you, dear. + +00:01:35.000 --> 00:01:46.000 +[action] He trips her; she falls out; laughter; he drops trousers, mimics lavatory chain, hurls himself after; door shuts; hosts sigh; return to wrecked sitting room with gags. + +00:01:46.000 --> 00:01:54.000 + +[dialogue] Oh honestly dear, why do we always have to buy everything just because the Cheap-Laughs have one? + +00:01:54.000 --> 00:02:02.000 +[action] He opens wall cupboard; bucket of whitewash falls. Cut briefly to Badger. + +00:02:02.000 --> 00:02:06.000 + +[dialogue] This is not an interruption at all. + +00:02:06.000 --> 00:02:12.000 +[action] Back to Mr Robinson; pours drink unfazed. + +00:02:12.000 --> 00:02:16.000 + +[dialogue] It's just neighbourliness dear, that's all… + +00:02:16.000 --> 00:02:20.000 + +[dialogue] I think we should try and lead our own lives from now on. + +00:02:20.000 --> 00:02:26.000 +[action] She opens sewing box; boxing glove on spring hits her chin. + +00:02:26.000 --> 00:02:30.000 + +[dialogue] Can't you be serious for one moment? + +00:02:30.000 --> 00:02:36.000 +[action] He sits on pouffe; sixteen-ton weight falls. + +00:02:36.000 --> 00:02:40.000 +[caption] LATER THAT NIGHT + +00:02:40.000 --> 00:02:48.000 +[action] Darkened bedroom; couple in bed talking. + +00:02:48.000 --> 00:02:52.000 + +[dialogue] I'm sorry I was cross earlier. + +00:02:52.000 --> 00:02:58.000 + +[dialogue] Oh that's all right, dear. It's just that I get so sick of always having to be like the Cheap-Laughs. + +00:02:58.000 --> 00:03:02.000 + +[dialogue] Well yes, from now on we'll be like ourselves. + +00:03:02.000 --> 00:03:05.000 + +[dialogue] Oh Roger… + +00:03:05.000 --> 00:03:08.000 + +[dialogue] Oh Beatrice. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_36_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/0_head_tail.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_36_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/0_head_tail.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..26bd0572 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_36_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/0_head_tail.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,26 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Episode intro links and end credits combined into a single head/tail file with placeholder timings. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:05.000 +[caption] Episode Thirty-six + +00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:10.000 +[caption] Colour code: John Cleese - Michael Palin - Eric Idle - Graham Chapman - Terry Jones - Terry Gilliam - Carol Cleveland + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:25.000 +[caption] Episode links: Tudor job agency; Pornographic bookshop; Silly disturbances (the Rev. Arthur Belling); The free repetition of doubtful words sketch, by an underrated author; 'Is there?'…life after death?; The man who says words in the wrong order; Thripshaw's disease; Silly noises; Sherry-drinking vicar + +00:24:00.000 --> 00:24:10.000 +[caption] SUPERIMPOSED CREDITS: 'IS THERE' INTRODUCED BY ROGER LAST; RESEARCH: J. LOSEY; L. ANDERSON; S. KUBRICK; P. P. PASOLINI; O. WELLES; THE LATE B. FORBES; PRODUCED BY: GILLIAN (AGED 3 1/2) + +00:45:00.000 --> 00:45:30.000 +[caption] End credits rolled over dirty postcards in Tudor dirty bookshop: MONTY PYTHON'S FLYING CIRCUS (censored) WAS CONCEIVED, WRITTEN AND CENSORED BY MICHAEL 'BULKY' PALIN; TERRY JONES 'KING OF THE LASH'; JOHN CLEESE 'A SMILE, A SONG AND A REFILL'; TERRY GILLIAM 'AN AMERICAN IN PLASTER'; GRAHAM 'A DOZEN WHOLESALE' CHAPMAN; ERIC IDLE (ACTUAL SIZE - BATTERIES EXTRA); ALSO APPEARING CAROL CLEVELAND ('FOUR REVEALING POSES'...); THE FRED TOMLINSON SINGERS; ... PRODUCED BY IAN MCNAUGHTON ... COPYRIGHT BBC TV £5 IN A PLAIN WRAPPER + +00:45:30.000 --> 00:45:40.000 +[action] Fade out. Fade up on the BBC world symbol. + +00:45:40.000 --> 00:45:50.000 + +E. Henry Thripshaw t-shirts are now available from BBC Enterprises. The price hasn't finally been decided, and the address to write to…they haven't yet quite worked out. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_36_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/1_Tudor_job_agency.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_36_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/1_Tudor_job_agency.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..4f1fcad5 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_36_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/1_Tudor_job_agency.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,107 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Start marked by anchor #1. Includes transition to back-room bookshop. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 +[action] Outside a shop. Sign reads 'Tuder Job Agency - Jobs a Speciality'. Man enters; interior decorated in Tudor style. Assistant in Tudor dress. + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:08.000 + +Morning, sir, can I help you? + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:14.000 + +Yes, yes… I wondered if you have any part-time vacancies on your books. + +00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:28.000 + +Part-time, I'll have a look, sir. [action] (he gets out a book and looks through it) Let me look now. We've got, ah yes, Sir Walter Raleigh is equipping another expedition to Virginia; he needs traders and sailors. Vittlers needed at the Court of Philip of Spain, oh, yes, and they want master joiners and craftsmen for the building of the Globe Theatre. + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:34.000 + +I see. Have you anything a bit more modern, you know, like a job on the buses, or digging the underground? + +00:00:34.000 --> 00:00:38.000 + +Oh no, we only have Tudor jobs. + +00:00:38.000 --> 00:00:42.000 + +That can't be very profitable, can it? + +00:00:42.000 --> 00:00:58.000 + +Well, you'd be surprised, actually sir. The Tudor economy's booming, ever since Sir Humphrey Gilbert opened up the Northwest passage to Cathay, and the Cabots' expansion in Canada, there's been a tremendous surge in exports, and trade with the Holy Roman Empire is going… no, quite right, it's no good at all. + +00:00:58.000 --> 00:01:01.000 + +What? + +00:01:01.000 --> 00:01:06.000 + +It's a dead loss. We haven't put anyone in a job since 1625. + +00:01:06.000 --> 00:01:09.000 + +I see. + +00:01:09.000 --> 00:01:12.000 + +That's all? + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:15.000 + +What? + +00:01:15.000 --> 00:01:18.000 + +That's all you say? + +00:01:18.000 --> 00:01:20.000 + +Yes. + +00:01:20.000 --> 00:01:44.000 + +No, no, we were the tops then. Drake got all his sailors here. Elizabeth, we supplied the archbishops for her coronation. Shakespeare started off from here as a temp. Then came James the First and the bottom fell out of the Tudor jobs. 1603 - 800 vacancies filled, 1604 - 40, 1605 - none, 1606 - none. The rest of the Stuart period nothing. Hanoverians nothing. Victorians nothing. Saxe-Coburgs nothing. Windsors… what did you want? + +00:01:44.000 --> 00:01:48.000 + +Dirty books, please. + +00:01:48.000 --> 00:01:58.000 + +Right. [action] (produces selection of mags from under counter) Sorry about the Tudor bit, but you can't be too careful, you know. Have a look through these. + +00:01:58.000 --> 00:02:04.000 + +Have you got anything a bit… er… + +00:02:04.000 --> 00:02:07.000 + +A bit stronger? + +00:02:07.000 --> 00:02:10.000 + +Yes. + +00:02:10.000 --> 00:02:14.000 + +Hold on … a… My Lord of Warwick! + +00:02:14.000 --> 00:02:17.000 + +[off] 'Allo! + +00:02:17.000 --> 00:02:22.000 + +Raise high the drawbridge. Gloucester's troops approach. + +00:02:22.000 --> 00:02:24.000 + +[off] Right. + +00:02:24.000 --> 00:02:28.000 + +Can't be too careful you know, sir. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_36_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/2_Pornographic_bookshop.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_36_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/2_Pornographic_bookshop.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..9aac3998 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_36_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/2_Pornographic_bookshop.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,459 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Start marked by anchor #2. Tudor wall slides to reveal Soho bookshop; includes Gaskell raid and Sidney sequence. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Wall of Tudor shop slides back to reveal bare Soho dirty bookshop, racks of magazines. Three drably dressed men browsing; one is a vicar. Second Assistant (in Tudor gear) serves Mr Nid at counter. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:10.000 + +There's a 'Bridget - Queen of the Whip'. + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:12.000 + +Yes… + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:22.000 + +Or 'Naughty Nora'… or there's this one: 'Doug, Bob and Gordon Visit the Ark Royal'. Or there's 'Sister Teresa - The Spanking Nun'. + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:28.000 + +Mmmm… I see … you don't have anything specially about Devon and Cornwall? + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:31.000 + +No. I'm afraid not, sir. + +00:00:31.000 --> 00:00:38.000 + +The one I was really after was Arthur Hotchkiss's 'Devonshire Country Churches'. + +00:00:38.000 --> 00:00:42.000 + +Well how about this, sir: 'Bum Biters'. + +00:00:42.000 --> 00:00:48.000 + +No … not really … I don't suppose you have any general surveys of English Church architecture? + +00:00:48.000 --> 00:00:51.000 + +No, it's not really our line, sir. + +00:00:51.000 --> 00:00:59.000 + +No, I see. Well, never mind I'll just take the 'Lord Lieutenant in Nylons' then, and these two copies of 'Piggie Parade'. Thank you. + +00:00:59.000 --> 00:01:01.000 + +Right, sir. + +00:01:01.000 --> 00:01:05.000 + +[voice over] My Lord of Warwick. + +00:01:05.000 --> 00:01:08.000 + +'Allo? + +00:01:08.000 --> 00:01:13.000 + +[voice over] Raise high the drawbridge. Gloucester's troops approach! + +00:01:13.000 --> 00:01:15.000 + +Right. + +00:01:15.000 --> 00:01:20.000 +[action] He presses a button; wall slides back. Man with big pile approaches counter. + +00:01:20.000 --> 00:01:23.000 + +Just these, then. + +00:01:23.000 --> 00:01:28.000 +[action] Enter Gaskell in Tudor gear. Wall closes up behind him. + +00:01:28.000 --> 00:01:34.000 + +All right. This is a raid. My name is Superintendent Gaskell and this is Sergeant Maddox. + +00:01:34.000 --> 00:01:39.000 + +Ah! Sir Philip Sidney. 'Tis good to see thee on these shores again. + +00:01:39.000 --> 00:01:41.000 + +Shut up. + +00:01:41.000 --> 00:01:46.000 + +Your suit is fair and goodly cut. Was't from Antwerp? + +00:01:46.000 --> 00:01:52.000 + +Shut up. It's a disguise. Right! Confiscate the smutty books, Maddox. + +00:01:52.000 --> 00:01:55.000 + +Sir Philip!. Prithee nay! + +00:01:55.000 --> 00:02:04.000 + +Listen, mate! Don't come that Philip Sidney bit with me. I'm not a bloody Tudor at all. I'm Gaskell of the Vice Squad and this is Sergeant Maddox. + +00:02:04.000 --> 00:02:09.000 +[action] All look blank. Gaskell looks for Maddox—he isn't there. + +00:02:09.000 --> 00:02:12.000 + +Maddox! Where's he gone? + +00:02:12.000 --> 00:02:15.000 + +Sir Philip, prithee rest awhile. + +00:02:15.000 --> 00:02:22.000 + +Look. This is the last time. I'm warning you, I'm not Sir Philip Bleeding Sidney. I am Superintendent Harold Gaskell and this is a raid. + +00:02:22.000 --> 00:02:28.000 +[action] Everyone resumes buying, ignoring him. Assistant tots up huge pile. + +00:02:28.000 --> 00:02:31.000 + +That'll be 540 quid sir. + +00:02:31.000 --> 00:02:35.000 + +Oh, I'll just have this one then. [action] (takes top one) + +00:02:35.000 --> 00:02:42.000 + +Maddox! [action] (to everyone; ignored) Look, this is a raid. (no reaction) Honestly, I promise you. [action] (blocks rear door) Where are you going? + +00:02:42.000 --> 00:02:45.000 + +I'm going home. + +00:02:45.000 --> 00:02:52.000 + +Right. [action] (searches for notebook; not in Tudor clothing) I'll remember you. Don't you worry. I'll remember you… + +00:02:52.000 --> 00:02:56.000 + +Pray good, Sir Philip, that you… + +00:02:56.000 --> 00:03:10.000 + +Don't you start! Maddox! [action] (customer leaves; others start to leave) Listen, I can prove to you I'm a policeman. I can give the names of all the men down in 'F' division at Acton: Inspector Arthur Perry, Superintendent Charles Frodwell, my best friend, police dogs, Batch, Wolf, Panther, Maudling. How would I know those names if I was Sir Philip Sidney? [action] (vicar approaches) Look, vicar, you know me. The Gargoyle Club - I got you off the charge. [action] (vicar leaves guiltily) + +00:03:10.000 --> 00:03:12.000 + +Farewell, good Sir Philip. + +00:03:12.000 --> 00:03:18.000 +[action] He goes out with magazines; then vicar goes; then Tudor man. + +00:03:18.000 --> 00:03:24.000 + +Hey, stop! [action] (door slams; Gaskell looks around empty shop; pause) Maddox! + +00:03:24.000 --> 00:03:30.000 +[action] He beats on sliding wall; turns to little back door and goes through. + +00:03:30.000 --> 00:03:34.000 + +You'll never get away with this, you porn merchant. Blimey! + +00:03:34.000 --> 00:03:40.000 +[action] He stops, gapes at a beautiful green Tudor garden; distant Tudor house. A girl sits sobbing on a stone bench. He walks towards her, bewildered. + +00:03:40.000 --> 00:03:42.000 + +Maddox! + +00:03:42.000 --> 00:03:50.000 + +Oh good sir, how glad I am to see thee come. Forgive me weeping, but my love has gone. + +00:03:50.000 --> 00:03:58.000 + +Er, listen. My name is Caskell … Superintendent Caskell of Vice Squad. Myself and Sergeant Maddox are on a raid. We are not Tudor people. We are the police. + +00:03:58.000 --> 00:04:02.000 +[action] An Elizabethan gentleman appears through the trees. + +00:04:02.000 --> 00:04:10.000 + +Frances, what idleness is this? Why, good Sir Philip Sidney, [action] (bows extravagantly) What hast thee here? + +00:04:10.000 --> 00:04:16.000 + +[action] (turning to Caskell with bated breath) You are Sir Philip Sidney? + +00:04:16.000 --> 00:04:22.000 + +… Possibly… but I may be Superintendent Gaskell of the Vice Squad. + +00:04:22.000 --> 00:04:28.000 + +Ah good, Sir Philip, thy sharp-tongued wit has not deserted thee. Come. Let us eat and drink. Stay with us awhile. + +00:04:28.000 --> 00:04:31.000 + +All right, sir. I think I will. + +00:04:31.000 --> 00:04:36.000 +[action] They walk off arm in arm into idyllic garden. Girl looks after them hopefully. [caption] Elizabethan music. + +00:04:36.000 --> 00:04:40.000 +[caption] SUPERIMPOSED: 'THE LIFE OF SIR PHILIP SIDNEY' + +00:04:40.000 --> 00:04:54.000 +[action] Mix to Tudor dining room banquet with minstrels. Guests listen to Gaskell; applause, laughter. + +00:04:54.000 --> 00:05:10.000 + +… then did we bust the Harry Tony mob, who did seek to import Scandinavian filth via Germany. For six years they cleaned up a packet - the day I got whiff of them through a squealer and within one week did a mop-up right good. They're now languishing doing five years bird in Parkhurst. + +00:05:10.000 --> 00:05:18.000 +[action] Applause. Cut: messenger gallops to house at dusk; bursts into room. + +00:05:18.000 --> 00:05:24.000 + +Sir Philip. The Spaniards have landed in the Netherlands. My Lord Walsingham needs you there forthwith. + +00:05:24.000 --> 00:05:26.000 + +Let's go. + +00:05:26.000 --> 00:05:32.000 +[action] Exterior: Gaskell rides off on messenger's horse. Dinner crowd waves: 'Good luck, Sir Philip!' + +00:05:32.000 --> 00:05:36.000 +[action] British standard fluttering; fanfare. Cliff-top: Elizabethan gentlemen and soldiers. + +00:05:36.000 --> 00:05:39.000 + +Where are the Spaniards? + +00:05:39.000 --> 00:05:44.000 + +Down below Sir Philip, their first boats are landing even now. + +00:05:44.000 --> 00:05:48.000 +[action] Shot of sailing-galley from above. + +00:05:48.000 --> 00:05:52.000 + +Right, you stay here, I'll go and get them. + +00:05:52.000 --> 00:05:55.000 + +Sir Philip! Not alone! + +00:05:55.000 --> 00:06:02.000 +[action] Beach: suspense music. Gaskell strides to camera; music crescendos. + +00:06:02.000 --> 00:06:05.000 + +Allo allo! What's going on here? + +00:06:05.000 --> 00:06:10.000 +[action] Beached rowing boat piled with dirty magazines; two Spaniards unloading. + +00:06:10.000 --> 00:06:14.000 + +Ees nothing, Señor, ees just some literature. + +00:06:14.000 --> 00:06:22.000 + +I know what literature is, you dago dustbin. I also know what porn is. [action] (brandishes loose magazine) What's this then eh? + +00:06:22.000 --> 00:06:26.000 + +It is one of Lope De Vega's latest play, Señor. + +00:06:26.000 --> 00:06:30.000 + +'Toledo Tit Parade'? What sort of play's that? + +00:06:30.000 --> 00:06:33.000 + +It's very visual, Señor. + +00:06:33.000 --> 00:06:38.000 + +Right. I'm taking this lot in the name of Her Gracious Majesty Queen Elizabeth. + +00:06:38.000 --> 00:06:41.000 + +Oh, but Señor. + +00:06:41.000 --> 00:06:47.000 + +Don't give me any trouble. Just pile up these baskets of filth and come with me. + +00:06:47.000 --> 00:06:56.000 +[action] Second Spaniard leaps with sword; fight ensues. Camera draws away; fight music over. + +00:06:56.000 --> 00:07:10.000 + +The battle raged long and hard, but as night fell Sidney overcame the Spaniards. 6,000 copies of 'Tits and Bums' and 4,000 copies of 'Shower Sheila' were seized that day. The tide of Spanish porn was stemmed. Sir Philip Sidney returned to London in triumph. + +00:07:10.000 --> 00:07:14.000 +[caption] 'LONDON 1583' over celebration street film. + +00:07:14.000 --> 00:07:18.000 +[action] Side-on close-up: Gaskell riding hard through woodland. + +00:07:18.000 --> 00:07:24.000 + +Covered in glory, Sir Philip rode home to Pensburst to see his beloved wife… but all was not well. + +00:07:24.000 --> 00:07:32.000 +[action] Gaskell runs to Tudor house; interior Elizabethan room—wife reading by fire. Gaskell enters. + +00:07:32.000 --> 00:07:42.000 + +Good evening all, my love. I have returned safe from the Low Countries. [action] (she hides book under knitting, whistles) What are thou reading, fair one? + +00:07:42.000 --> 00:07:45.000 + +Oh, 'tis nothing, husband. + +00:07:45.000 --> 00:07:48.000 + +I can see 'tis something. + +00:07:48.000 --> 00:07:51.000 + +'Tis one of Shakespeare's latest works. + +00:07:51.000 --> 00:07:56.000 +[action] Gaskell picks up book; reads title. + +00:07:56.000 --> 00:08:02.000 + +Oh …'Gay Boys in Bondage' What, is't - tragedy? Comedy? + +00:08:02.000 --> 00:08:08.000 + +'Tis a… er… 'tis a story of a man's great love for his… fellow men. + +00:08:08.000 --> 00:08:12.000 + +How fortunate we are indeed to have such a poet on these shores. + +00:08:12.000 --> 00:08:15.000 + +Indeed. How was the war, my lord? + +00:08:15.000 --> 00:08:18.000 + +The Spaniards were defeated thrice. Six dozen chests of hardcore captured. + +00:08:18.000 --> 00:08:22.000 + +[action] (trying to look innocent) Hast brought home any spoils of war? + +00:08:22.000 --> 00:08:26.000 + +Yes, good my wife, this fair coat trimmed with ermine. + +00:08:26.000 --> 00:08:29.000 + +[action] (without enthusiasm) Oh, lovely, nowt else? + +00:08:29.000 --> 00:08:32.000 + +No, no fair lady. The rest was too smutty. + +00:08:32.000 --> 00:08:35.000 +[action] He settles by her feet and the fire. + +00:08:35.000 --> 00:08:41.000 + +Now, my good wife. Whilst I rest, read to me a while from Shakespeare's 'Gay Boys in Bondage'. + +00:08:41.000 --> 00:08:48.000 +[action] Wife reluctantly opens book and reads. + +00:08:48.000 --> 00:08:56.000 + +Yes… my lord … 'Gay Boys in Bondage' … Ken, 25, is a mounted policeman with a difference… and what a difference. Even Roger is surprised and he's… [action] (looks sick with guilt) he's used to real men … + +00:08:56.000 --> 00:08:59.000 + +'Tis like 'Hamlet' … what a genius! + +00:08:59.000 --> 00:09:03.000 + +'But who's going to do the cooking tonight? Roddy's got a mouthful…' + +00:09:03.000 --> 00:09:07.000 +[action] Enter Maddox, modern plain-clothes policeman. + +00:09:07.000 --> 00:09:10.000 + +All right, this is a raid. + +00:09:10.000 --> 00:09:14.000 +[action] Wife screams; Gaskell leaps up. + +00:09:14.000 --> 00:09:16.000 + +Oh! We are disgraced! + +00:09:16.000 --> 00:09:18.000 + +There you are, Maddox! + +00:09:18.000 --> 00:09:21.000 + +Cut the chat… and get in the van. + +00:09:21.000 --> 00:09:25.000 + +Maddox! You recognize me… + +00:09:25.000 --> 00:09:32.000 + +Indeed I do, Sir Philip Sidney, and sad I am to see you caught up in this morass of filth, [action] (picks up book) ooh - that's a long one. + +00:09:32.000 --> 00:09:36.000 + +Oh oh… the glorious name of Sidney is besmirched … all is lost … oh alas the day. + +00:09:36.000 --> 00:09:40.000 + +Shut up! I know this man - this is my old mate Sergeant Maddox… + +00:09:40.000 --> 00:09:42.000 + +You'll do time for this. + +00:09:42.000 --> 00:09:48.000 + +Oh Maddox - it's me - Gaskell … 'F' division down at Acton … Inspector Arthur Frodwell. + +00:09:48.000 --> 00:09:52.000 + +Come on Sidney. [action] (bundles them both out) And you, miss. + +00:09:52.000 --> 00:09:58.000 + +I'm not Sir Philip bleedin' Sidney …. and where were you? We could have mopped up that Tudor shop… + +00:09:58.000 --> 00:10:02.000 +[action] Maddox pauses to pick a book from bookcase near door. + +00:10:02.000 --> 00:10:04.000 + +Ooh! That's a good one! + +00:10:04.000 --> 00:10:12.000 +[action] Outside modern theatre stage-door: Gaskell and Mrs Sidney bundled into police van. Poster revealed: 'The Aldwych Theatre, The Royal Shakespeare Company Presents 'Gay Boys In Bondage' By William Shakespeare'. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_36_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/3_Silly_disturbances_(the_Rev.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_36_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/3_Silly_disturbances_(the_Rev.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..47cc717b --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_36_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/3_Silly_disturbances_(the_Rev.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,137 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Start marked by anchor #3. Restaurant encounter leading to church and nude organist. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Animated excerpt from 'Gay Boys in Bondage' leads to table outside a restaurant. Young couple sit blissfully. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:10.000 + +It's nice here, darling, isn't it. + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:14.000 + +It's beautiful, it's Paris all over again. + +00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:20.000 +[action] Enter vicar with bald wig and fright hair, carrying suitcase. + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:24.000 + +Excuse me, do you mind if I join you? + +00:00:24.000 --> 00:00:28.000 + +Er, no… no… no… not at all. + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:31.000 + +Are you sure you don't mind? + +00:00:31.000 --> 00:00:34.000 + +Yes, yes, absolutely. + +00:00:34.000 --> 00:00:38.000 + +You're sure I won't be disturbing you? + +00:00:38.000 --> 00:00:40.000 + +No, no. + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:44.000 + +You're absolutely sure I won't be disturbing you? + +00:00:44.000 --> 00:00:46.000 + +No, no really. + +00:00:46.000 --> 00:00:52.000 + +Good. Because I don't want to disturb you. Specially as you're being so kind about me not disturbing you. + +00:00:52.000 --> 00:00:56.000 + +Oh, no, no, we don't mind, do we, darling? + +00:00:56.000 --> 00:00:58.000 + +Oh no, darling. + +00:00:58.000 --> 00:01:02.000 + +Good, so I can go ahead and join you then? Can I? + +00:01:02.000 --> 00:01:04.000 + +Yes … yes… + +00:01:04.000 --> 00:01:06.000 + +Won't be disturbing? + +00:01:06.000 --> 00:01:08.000 + +No. No. + +00:01:08.000 --> 00:01:16.000 + +Good, good. You're very kind. [action] (sits) A lot of people are far less understanding than you are. A lot of people take offense even when I talk to them. [action] (strange hand gestures) Let alone when I specifically tell them about my being disturbing. + +00:01:16.000 --> 00:01:20.000 + +… Well, it's not particularly disturbing. + +00:01:20.000 --> 00:01:32.000 +No, absolutely, absolutely, that's what I always say. [action] (smashes plates on table) But you'd be amazed at the number of people who really don't want me - I mean, even doing this [action] (bobs rubber crab and baby doll, makes loud silly noises) gets people looking at me in the most extraordinary way. [action] (breaks more plates, squirts shaving cream over head) + +00:01:32.000 --> 00:01:35.000 + +We must be getting on. + +00:01:35.000 --> 00:01:41.000 + +I knew I'd disturb you … I knew I'd disturb you … [action] (miserably) It always happens … whenever I've found someone I really think I'm going to be able to get on with… + +00:01:41.000 --> 00:01:46.000 + +No, the only thing is, you see, we're going to be a little bit late. + +00:01:46.000 --> 00:01:50.000 + +[action] (sits, comforting vicar) Let's stay. + +00:01:50.000 --> 00:01:56.000 + +Well, just a little bit… I mean, we will be late if we don't… [action] (sits reluctantly) + +00:01:56.000 --> 00:01:58.000 + +Oh, thank you. You're very kind. + +00:01:58.000 --> 00:02:06.000 +[action] More silly behaviour; couple embarrassed. Dissolve to them at home smashing plates, making silly noises, covering themselves with shaving cream. + +00:02:06.000 --> 00:02:16.000 + +[voice over] As it turned out our chance meeting with Reverend Arthur Belling was to change our whole way of life, and every Sunday [action] (film of them running into a church) we'd hurry along to St Loony up the Cream Bun and Jam. + +00:02:16.000 --> 00:02:22.000 +[action] Hold shot of church. Sound of congregation standing; silly noises heard. + +00:02:22.000 --> 00:02:26.000 +[action] Nude organist plays a fanfare. + +00:02:26.000 --> 00:02:28.000 + +And now… + +00:02:28.000 --> 00:02:30.000 + +It's… + +00:02:30.000 --> 00:02:34.000 +[action] Animated titles; straight into animated sketch. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_36_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/4_The_free_repetition_of_doubtful_words_sketch,_by_an_underrated_author.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_36_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/4_The_free_repetition_of_doubtful_words_sketch,_by_an_underrated_author.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..f950ff0c --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_36_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/4_The_free_repetition_of_doubtful_words_sketch,_by_an_underrated_author.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,99 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Start marked by anchor #4. Telegram enquiries vignette and quartet. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:05.000 +[caption] 'THE FREE REPETITION OF DOUBTFUL WORDS - SKIT, SPOOF, JAPE OR VIGNETTE, BY A VERY UNDER-RATED WRITER' + +00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:12.000 +[action] Post office counter window labeled 'Telegram Enquiries' seen through ornate vignette. Clerk behind counter. Enter Mr Peepee. Stilted speech style. + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:17.000 + +I've come for some free repetition of doubtful words on an inland telegram. + +00:00:17.000 --> 00:00:20.000 + +Have you got the telegram in question? + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:23.000 + +I have the very thing here. + +00:00:23.000 --> 00:00:28.000 + +Well, slip it to me my good chap and let me eye the contents. + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:31.000 + +At once Mr Telegram Enquiry Man. + +00:00:31.000 --> 00:00:40.000 + +Thank you Mr Customer Man. [action] (reads) Aha. 'Parling I glove you. Clease clome at bronce, your troving swife, Pat.' Which was the word you wanted checking? + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:42.000 + +Pat. + +00:00:42.000 --> 00:00:44.000 + +Pat? + +00:00:44.000 --> 00:00:48.000 + +My wife's name is not Pat at all. + +00:00:48.000 --> 00:00:50.000 + +No? + +00:00:50.000 --> 00:00:54.000 + +It's Bat. With a B. + +00:00:54.000 --> 00:00:58.000 + +And therefore I will take a quick look in the book. + +00:00:58.000 --> 00:01:00.000 + +Ripping. + +00:01:00.000 --> 00:01:03.000 +[caption] 'ONE QUICK LOOK IN THE BOOK LATER' + +00:01:03.000 --> 00:01:07.000 + +You're quite right, old cock. There has been a mistake. + +00:01:07.000 --> 00:01:10.000 + +I thought as much. What really does it say? + +00:01:10.000 --> 00:01:16.000 + +It say 'Go away you silly little bleeder. I am having another man. Love Bat'. Quite some error. + +00:01:16.000 --> 00:01:20.000 + +Yes. She wouldn't call herself Pat, it's silly. + +00:01:20.000 --> 00:01:22.000 + +Daft, I call it. + +00:01:22.000 --> 00:01:26.000 + +Well it has been a pleasure working with you. + +00:01:26.000 --> 00:01:30.000 + +For me also it has been a pleasure. And that concludes our little skit. + +00:01:30.000 --> 00:01:36.000 +[action] String quartet music starts; widen to reveal quartet playing in set. Clerk and Peepee pose. + +00:01:36.000 --> 00:01:40.000 +[caption] 'THE FREE REPETITION OF DOUBTFUL WORDS THING, BY A JUSTLY UNDERRATED WRITER - THE END' + diff --git "a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_36_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/5_'Is_there_'\342\200\246life_after_death_.vtt" "b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_36_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/5_'Is_there_'\342\200\246life_after_death_.vtt" new file mode 100644 index 00000000..06c60c39 --- /dev/null +++ "b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_36_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/5_'Is_there_'\342\200\246life_after_death_.vtt" @@ -0,0 +1,14 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Start marked by anchor #5. Panel show with dead guests. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Late-night religious-type discussion set. Chairman and three guests slumped motionless. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:40.000 + +Good evening. Tonight on 'Is There' we examine the question, 'Is there a life after death?'. And here to discuss it are three dead people… The late Sir Brian Hardacre, former curator of the Imperial War Museum … [caption] (superimposed captions identify them) the late Professor Thynne, until recently an academic, critic, and broadcaster … and putting the view of the Church of England, the very late Prebendary Reverend Ross. Gentlemen, is there a life after death or not? Sir Brian? (silence) Professor? … Prebendary?…. Well there we have it, three say no. On 'Is There' next week we'll be discussing the question 'Is there enough of it about?', and until then, goodnight. + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:56.000 +[caption] SUPERIMPOSED CREDITS: 'IS THERE' INTRODUCED BY ROGER LAST; RESEARCH: J. LOSEY; L. ANDERSON; S. KUBRICK; P. P. PASOLINI; O. WELLES; THE LATE B. FORBES; PRODUCED BY: GILLIAN (AGED 3 1/2) [action] Under credits, stiffs carried off. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_36_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/6_The_man_who_says_words_in_the_wrong_order.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_36_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/6_The_man_who_says_words_in_the_wrong_order.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..f0b3e15c --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_36_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/6_The_man_who_says_words_in_the_wrong_order.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,103 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Start marked by anchor #6. Burrows visits Dr Thripshaw. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:05.000 +[action] Doctor's surgery. Plaque: 'Dr E. H. Thripshaw'. Enter Burrows. + +00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:09.000 + +Good doctor morning! Nice year for the time of day! + +00:00:09.000 --> 00:00:11.000 + +Come in. + +00:00:11.000 --> 00:00:14.000 + +Can I down sit? + +00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:18.000 + +Certainly. [action] (Burrows sits) Well, then? + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:26.000 + +Well, now, not going to bush the doctor about the beat too long. I'm going to come to point the straight immediately. + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:28.000 + +Good, good. + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:34.000 + +My particular prob, or buglem bear, I've had ages. For years, I've had it for donkeys. + +00:00:34.000 --> 00:00:36.000 + +What? + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:42.000 + +I'm up to here with it, I'm sick to death. I can't take you any longer so I've come to see it. + +00:00:42.000 --> 00:00:46.000 + +Ah, now this is your problem with words. + +00:00:46.000 --> 00:00:52.000 + +This is my problem with words. Oh, that seems to have cleared it. 'Oh I come from Alabama with my banjo on my knee'. Yes, that seems to be all right. Thank you very much. + +00:00:52.000 --> 00:00:57.000 + +I see. But recently you have been having this problem with your word order. + +00:00:57.000 --> 00:01:04.000 + +Well, absolutely, and what makes it worse, sometimes at the end of a sentence I'll come out with the wrong fusebox. + +00:01:04.000 --> 00:01:06.000 + +Fusebox? + +00:01:06.000 --> 00:01:12.000 + +And the thing about saying the wrong word is a) I don't notice it, and b) sometimes orange water given bucket of plaster. + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:16.000 + +Yes, tell me more about your problem. + +00:01:16.000 --> 00:01:24.000 + +Well as I say, you'd just be talking and out'll pudenda the wrong word and ashtray's your uncle. So I'm really strawberry about it. + +00:01:24.000 --> 00:01:26.000 + +Upset? + +00:01:26.000 --> 00:01:31.000 + +It's so embarrassing when my wife and I go to an orgy. + +00:01:31.000 --> 00:01:33.000 + +A party? + +00:01:33.000 --> 00:01:36.000 + +No, an orgy. We live in Esher. + +00:01:36.000 --> 00:01:38.000 + +Quite. + +00:01:38.000 --> 00:01:44.000 + +That's what I said. Such a bloody whack the diddle fa di la, fo di la, lo do di … do di do, rum fum. + +00:01:44.000 --> 00:02:02.000 + +Mr Burrows, this is no common problem. You are suffering from a disease so rare that it hasn't got a name. Not yet. But it will have. Oh yes. This is the opportunity I've been waiting for. The chance of a lifetime! [action] (dramatic spotlight) I'll show them at the Royal College of Surgeons! I'll make them sit up and take notice! Thripshaw's disease! Discovered by E. Henry Thripshaw MD! I'll be invited on 'Call My Bluff' and the merchandizing, there'll be E. Henry Thripshaw t-shirts … I'll turn it into a game … I'll sell the film rights. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_36_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/7_Thripshaw's_disease.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_36_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/7_Thripshaw's_disease.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..781d6d51 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_36_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/7_Thripshaw's_disease.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,54 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Start marked by anchor #7. Filmization and interview with autocue. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:08.000 +[action] Booklet front: 'A Dissertation on Thripshaw's Disease Presented to the Royal College of Surgeons by Dr E. Henry Thripshaw'. Captions zoom: HARLEY STREET; FLEET STREET; BROADWAY; HOLLYWOOD. + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:14.000 +[action] Pages turn: 'David O. Seltzer Presents' → 'Rip Glint in:' → stone-lettered title with searchlights: 'Dr E. Henry Thripshaw's Disease'. Cut to stock of marauding knights. + +00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:17.000 +[caption] 'SYRIA 1203' + +00:00:17.000 --> 00:00:24.000 +[action] Knights sack village: looting, pillaging, burning, murdering. Cut to studio interview set. + +00:00:24.000 --> 00:00:36.000 + +That clip… comes from the new David O. Seltzer… film. The author… of that film clip … is with me … now. Doctor E. Henry … Thripshaw. + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:41.000 + +Well, I feel that they have missed the whole point of my disease. + +00:00:41.000 --> 00:00:49.000 + +This is …. always the problem … with directors of film… clips. + +00:00:49.000 --> 00:00:53.000 + +Yes, well you see, they've dragged in all this irrelevant mush… + +00:00:53.000 --> 00:00:57.000 + +What… are you doing … now? + +00:00:57.000 --> 00:01:05.000 + +Well at the moment I am working on a new disease, which I hope to turn into a musical, but, primarily we are working on a re-make of my first disease and this time we're hoping to do it properly. + +00:01:05.000 --> 00:01:10.000 + +Well … let's just … take a … look at this new film…clip. + +00:01:10.000 --> 00:01:18.000 +[action] Film clip repeats as before. + +00:01:18.000 --> 00:01:22.000 +[action] Cut: Thripshaw at desk in castle. Knight rushes up. + +00:01:22.000 --> 00:01:25.000 + +Well now, what seems to be the matter? + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_36_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/8_Silly_noises.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_36_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/8_Silly_noises.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..260a77ed --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_36_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/8_Silly_noises.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,11 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Start marked by anchor #8. Barrel man announces next sketch. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 +[action] Corner of set: a man emerges from a barrel. + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:08.000 + +The next sketch starts after some silly noises. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_36_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/9_Sherry-drinking_vicar.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_36_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/9_Sherry-drinking_vicar.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..d728ff27 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_36_-_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/9_Sherry-drinking_vicar.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,214 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Start marked by anchor #9. Vestry scene with sherry logistics, Spanish singers, and callback. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Black screen with collection of really silly noises. Fade up on country church; cut to interior vestry. Sign reads 'No Papists'. Vicar enters post-service; removes cassock; sculpture with long-nosed vicar head on plinth. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:08.000 + +Come in. + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:12.000 + +I wondered if I could have a word with you for a moment. + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:18.000 + +By all means … by all means, sir. Do sit down. [action] (look around for chair) Ah, sit on the desk here. + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:20.000 + +Thank you. + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:24.000 + +Now then, a glass of sherry? + +00:00:24.000 --> 00:00:28.000 + +No… no thank you… + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:32.000 + +[action] (getting a bottle from cupboard) Are you sure? I'm going to have some. + +00:00:32.000 --> 00:00:36.000 + +Well, if you're having some, yes then, perhaps, vicar. + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:40.000 + +[action] (slightly taken aback) Oh… well there's only just enough for me. + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:44.000 + +Well in that case I won't, don't worry. + +00:00:44.000 --> 00:00:48.000 + +You see, if I split what's left, there'd be hardly any left for me at all. + +00:00:48.000 --> 00:00:52.000 + +Well, I'm not a great sherry drinker. + +00:00:52.000 --> 00:00:55.000 + +Good! So, I can have it all … now then what's the problem? + +00:00:55.000 --> 00:00:59.000 + +Well, just recently I've begun to worry about… + +00:00:59.000 --> 00:01:03.000 +[action] Vicar searches desk; triumphantly produces another bottle of sherry. + +00:01:03.000 --> 00:01:07.000 + +Ah! I've found another bottle! You can have some now if you want to. + +00:01:07.000 --> 00:01:10.000 + +Well… yes, perhaps a little… + +00:01:10.000 --> 00:01:13.000 + +Oh you don't have to. I can drink the whole bottle. + +00:01:13.000 --> 00:01:16.000 + +Well in that case, no… + +00:01:16.000 --> 00:01:19.000 + +Good! That's another bottle for me. Do go on. + +00:01:19.000 --> 00:01:24.000 +[action] Vicar pours and drinks repeatedly. + +00:01:24.000 --> 00:01:27.000 + +I've begun to worry recently that… + +00:01:27.000 --> 00:01:29.000 +[action] Knock on door. + +00:01:29.000 --> 00:01:31.000 + +Come in! + +00:01:31.000 --> 00:01:36.000 +[action] A smooth man, Mr Husband, enters with briefcase. + +00:01:36.000 --> 00:01:44.000 + +Ah, Mr Husband … this is Mr Kirkham, one of my parishioners, this is Mr Husband of the British Sherry Corporation… + +00:01:44.000 --> 00:01:48.000 + +Look, look, perhaps I'd better come back later… + +00:01:48.000 --> 00:01:52.000 + +No, no … no do stay here. Have a sherry… you won't be long will you, Husband? + +00:01:52.000 --> 00:01:55.000 + +Oh no, vicar… it's just a question of signing a few forms. + +00:01:55.000 --> 00:01:58.000 +[action] Vicar pours Husband a sherry. + +00:01:58.000 --> 00:02:02.000 + +There we are… there we are, Mr Husband. Now, how about you, Mr Kirkham? + +00:02:02.000 --> 00:02:05.000 + +Well only if there's enough. + +00:02:05.000 --> 00:02:08.000 + +Oh well, there's not much now. + +00:02:08.000 --> 00:02:11.000 + +Oh, in that case… no… I won't bother. + +00:02:11.000 --> 00:02:15.000 + +[action] (pouring himself one) Good. Right… now, then, what is the problem, Husband? + +00:02:15.000 --> 00:02:21.000 + +Well, vicar, I've made enquiries with our shippers and the most sherry they can ship in any one load is 12,000 gallons. + +00:02:21.000 --> 00:02:24.000 + +And how many glasses is that? + +00:02:24.000 --> 00:02:28.000 + +That's roughly 540,000 glasses, Vicar. + +00:02:28.000 --> 00:02:31.000 + +That's excellent, Husband, excellent. + +00:02:31.000 --> 00:02:37.000 + +Yes… it means you can still keep your main sherry supply on the roof, but you can have an emergency supply underneath the vestry of 5,000 gallons. + +00:02:37.000 --> 00:02:41.000 + +Yes… and I could have dry sherry on the roof and Amontillado in the underground tank! + +00:02:41.000 --> 00:02:43.000 + +Absolutely. + +00:02:43.000 --> 00:02:47.000 +[action] Vicar signs form. + +00:02:47.000 --> 00:02:50.000 + +Excellent work, Husband, excellent work. + +00:02:50.000 --> 00:02:55.000 + +Not at all, vicar, you're one of our best customers… you and the United States. Well goodbye. + +00:02:55.000 --> 00:02:58.000 +[action] Husband leaves. + +00:02:58.000 --> 00:03:02.000 + +Terrific. Now then, Mr Kirkham [action] (pouring another sherry) I am so sorry… do go on. + +00:03:02.000 --> 00:03:05.000 + +Well, it's just that recently I've begun to worry about… + +00:03:05.000 --> 00:03:07.000 + +Well, look… + +00:03:07.000 --> 00:03:12.000 + +I sometimes ask myself - does the Bible intend… + +00:03:12.000 --> 00:03:24.000 +[action] A group of Spanish singers in full national costume with guitars burst in, noisily singing a song praising Amontillado. A flamboyant man with hat sign 'Sherry, the drink of champions' enters; two girls with maracas and Carmen Miranda hats. Mr Kirkham looks fed up. Song ends noisily. + +00:03:24.000 --> 00:03:26.000 + +What did you want? + +00:03:26.000 --> 00:03:29.000 + +Dirty books, please. + +00:03:29.000 --> 00:03:40.000 +[action] Noisy transaction as we cut to end credits rolled over dirty postcards section of Tudor dirty bookshop. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_37_-_Episode_Thirty-seven/0_Episode37_head_tail.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_37_-_Episode_Thirty-seven/0_Episode37_head_tail.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..217f6c34 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_37_-_Episode_Thirty-seven/0_Episode37_head_tail.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,55 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Intro titles in ring and final credits redistribution scene. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:03.000 +[Music] Sports programme music under floodlit boxing ring. + +00:00:03.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[Graphic] 'BOXING TONIGHT' superimposed. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:25.000 + +'Boxing Tonight' comes from the Empire Pool, Wembley and features the main heavyweight bout between Jack Bodell, British and Empire Heavyweight Champion. And Sir Kenneth Clark... It's the first time these two have met so there should be some real action tonight... + +00:00:25.000 --> 00:00:28.000 +[Action] Bell rings; crowd noise; Sir Kenneth wanders as in 'Civilization'. + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:33.000 + +This then is the height of the English Renaissance, the triumph of Classical over Gothic ... the ... + +00:00:33.000 --> 00:00:36.000 +[Action] Bodell swings a left and knocks Sir Kenneth down. + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:44.000 + +He's down! Sir Kenneth Clark is down in eight seconds. But he's up again. He's up at six... + +00:00:44.000 --> 00:00:48.000 + +The almost ordered facades of Palladio's villas reflects the... + +00:00:48.000 --> 00:00:58.000 +[Action] Bodell knocks him down again. Ref counts Clark out and holds up Bodell's hand. Bodell becomes the new Oxford Professor of Fine Art. + +00:00:58.000 --> 00:01:04.000 + +Thank you, thank you, thank you, ladies and gentlemen. And now... + +00:01:04.000 --> 00:01:07.000 +[Music] Nude organist plays a chord; grins. + +00:01:07.000 --> 00:01:09.000 + +It's... + +00:19:30.000 --> 00:20:10.000 +[Credits sequence] Dennis Moore redistributes valuables among coach passengers while credits roll; admonishes passengers for cheating and hiding tiaras. + +00:20:10.000 --> 00:20:14.000 +[Caption] ERRATUM. JACK BODELL WAS BORN IN SWADLINCOTE IN DERBYSHIRE. + +00:20:14.000 --> 00:20:40.000 +[Scene] Judges on bus after Ideal Loon Exhibition; one is consoled; another cries with his mother; another rips up number card; bus destination board reads 'The End'; sign on building: 'Hospital... sorry no cheques'. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_37_-_Episode_Thirty-seven/10_'Prejudice'.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_37_-_Episode_Thirty-seven/10_'Prejudice'.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..bb1888bb --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_37_-_Episode_Thirty-seven/10_'Prejudice'.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,32 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Anchor #10: Prejudice show; slur-heavy satire and 'Shoot The Poof' gag. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[Applause] Women's Institute style. Stage sign reads 'Prejudice'. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:34.000 + +Good evening and welcome to another edition of 'Prejudice' - the show that gives you a chance to have a go at Wops, Krauts, Nigs, Eyeties, Gippos, Bubbles, Froggies, Chinks, Yidds, Jocks, Polacks, Paddies and Dagoes. + +00:00:34.000 --> 00:00:36.000 +[Caption] ALL FACTS VERIFIED BY THE RHODESIAN POLICE. + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:01:28.000 + +Tonight's show comes live from the tiny village of Rabid in Buckinghamshire, and our first question tonight is from a Mrs Elizabeth Scrint... [Monologue about Syrians and competition results: 'Sprouts', 'Phlegms', and winner 'Miserable Fat Belgian Bastards'. Thanks Carol.] But as you know on this programme we're not just prejudiced against race or colour, we're also prejudiced against - yes, you've guessed, stinking homosexuals! So... invite you once again to - Shoot The Poof! And could our first contestant sign in please. + +00:01:28.000 --> 00:01:34.000 +[Action] Contestant writes name at blackboard. + +00:01:34.000 --> 00:01:37.000 + +Our first contestant is a hairdresser from... + +00:01:37.000 --> 00:01:40.000 +[SFX] Gunshot; contestant falls; applause. Cut to camp highwayman with pink mask. + +00:01:40.000 --> 00:01:43.000 + +I never did like that kind of person... ! + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_37_-_Episode_Thirty-seven/11_Dennis_Moore__Redistibuting_the_wealth.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_37_-_Episode_Thirty-seven/11_Dennis_Moore__Redistibuting_the_wealth.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..42933051 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_37_-_Episode_Thirty-seven/11_Dennis_Moore__Redistibuting_the_wealth.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,20 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Anchor #11: Moore tries to balance loot among passengers; end tags. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:03.000 +[SFX] Gunshot; camp highwayman dies. Dennis Moore on horse holsters gun and rides. + +00:00:03.000 --> 00:00:10.000 +[Action] Moore swoops on stagecoach. + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:40.000 + +Halt! Halt! Gentlemen, ladies, bring out your valuables please. Come along sir, come along. Come along, madam, come along. Oh, is that all you've got ... well, he's got much more than you ... so you'd better have some of his ... ... sorry... pick them up in a moment... there's about oh, what, nine down there... so you must have about... oh, he's still got lots... oh you've got what? ... you've got more than he started with... so if I give you some of those ... well now, look ... have you got a bit of jewellery? If I give you that one and you have some of his coins ... is that another box? Were you trying to hide it? Well, that's nice! Right! Now. I've got a tiara ... you've got one... you've got one of the boxes... you've got one... anyone else got a tiara? Take your hat off!... Oh, honestly, it's absolutely pointless trying to do this if you're going to cheat. It really is awful of you... + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:43.000 +[Caption] ERRATUM. JACK BODELL WAS BORN IN SWADLINCOTE IN DERBYSHIRE. + +00:00:43.000 --> 00:01:10.000 +[Coda] Inside bus: disappointed judges; consoling friend; crying judge with mother; another rips number; bus destination 'The End'; sign on building: 'Hospital... sorry no cheques'. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_37_-_Episode_Thirty-seven/1_'Boxing_tonight'_-_Jack_Bodell_v.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_37_-_Episode_Thirty-seven/1_'Boxing_tonight'_-_Jack_Bodell_v.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..2aa905be --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_37_-_Episode_Thirty-seven/1_'Boxing_tonight'_-_Jack_Bodell_v.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,50 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Anchor #1 marks start of skit. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:02.500 +[Action] Floodlit boxing ring. Sports programme music. + +00:00:02.500 --> 00:00:05.000 +[Caption] 'BOXING TONIGHT' superimposed. + +00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:24.000 + +'Boxing Tonight' comes from the Empire Pool, Wembley and features the main heavyweight bout between Jack Bodell, British and Empire Heavyweight Champion. And Sir Kenneth Clark... It's the first time these two have met so there should be some real action tonight... + +00:00:24.000 --> 00:00:27.000 +[Action] Bell goes. Crowd noise. Sir Kenneth wanders around as in 'Civilization'. + +00:00:27.000 --> 00:00:32.000 + +This then is the height of the English Renaissance, the triumph of Classical over Gothic ... the ... + +00:00:32.000 --> 00:00:35.000 +[Action] Bodell swings a left and knocks Sir Kenneth down. + +00:00:35.000 --> 00:00:41.000 + +He's down! Sir Kenneth Clark is down in eight seconds. But he's up again. He's up at six... + +00:00:41.000 --> 00:00:45.000 + +The almost ordered facades of Palladio's villas reflects the... + +00:00:45.000 --> 00:00:55.000 + +And he's down again, and I don't think he's going to get up this time. No, so Jack Bodell has defeated Sir Kenneth Clark in the very first round here tonight and so this big Lincolnshire heavyweight becomes the new Oxford Professor of Fine Art. + +00:00:55.000 --> 00:00:58.000 +[Action] Zoom to ring; announcer takes mike lowered on a wire. + +00:00:58.000 --> 00:01:02.000 + +Thank you, thank you, thank you, ladies and gentlemen. And now... + +00:01:02.000 --> 00:01:05.000 +[Music] Nude organist plays a chord; grins. + +00:01:05.000 --> 00:01:07.000 + +It's... + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_37_-_Episode_Thirty-seven/2_Dennis_Moore.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_37_-_Episode_Thirty-seven/2_Dennis_Moore.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..4d5484b7 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_37_-_Episode_Thirty-seven/2_Dennis_Moore.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,152 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Anchor #2 marks start of skit: the highwayman and lupins. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[Scenery] Slow pan across idyllic countryside; 18th-century coach travels along valley; Dennis Moore rides up brandishing pistols. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:44.000 + +Stand and deliver! Drop that gun! Let that be a warning to you all. You move at your peril, for I have two pistols here. I know one of them isn't loaded any more, but the other one is, so that's one of you dead for sure... or just about for sure anyway. It certainly wouldn't be worth your while risking it because I'm a very good shot. I practice every day... well, not absolutely every day, but most days in the week... I expect I must practice, oh, at least four or five times a week at least... at least four or five, only some weekends... like last weekend, there really wasn't the time, so that moved the average down a bit... but I should say it's definitely a solid four days' practice a week... at least. I mean... I reckon I could hit that tree over there... the one just behind that hillock... not the big hillock, the little hillock on the left. You see the three trees, the third from the left and back a bit - that one - I reckon I could hit that four times out of five... on a good day. Say with this wind... say, say, seven times out of ten... + +00:00:44.000 --> 00:00:46.000 + +What, that tree there? + +00:00:46.000 --> 00:00:47.500 + +Which one? + +00:00:47.500 --> 00:00:50.500 + +The big beech with the sort of bare branch coming out of the top left. + +00:00:50.500 --> 00:00:52.500 + +No, no, no, not that one. + +00:00:52.500 --> 00:00:55.500 + +No, no, he means the one over there. Look, you see that one. + +00:00:55.500 --> 00:00:56.500 + +Yes. + +00:00:56.500 --> 00:00:59.500 + +Well now, go two along to the right. + +00:00:59.500 --> 00:01:02.000 + +Just near that little bush. + +00:01:02.000 --> 00:01:04.500 + +Well, it's the one just behind it. + +00:01:04.500 --> 00:01:06.500 + +Ah! The elm. + +00:01:06.500 --> 00:01:12.000 + +No, that's not an elm. An elm's got sort of great clumps of leaves like that. That's either a beech or a... er... hornbeam. + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:13.000 + +A hornbeam? + +00:01:13.000 --> 00:01:18.000 + +Oh, no not a hornbeam, What's the tree that has a leaf with sort of regular veins coming out and the veins go all the way out to the... + +00:01:18.000 --> 00:01:19.500 + +Serrated? + +00:01:19.500 --> 00:01:21.000 + +...to the serrated edges. + +00:01:21.000 --> 00:01:22.000 + +A willow! + +00:01:22.000 --> 00:01:23.000 + +That's right. + +00:01:23.000 --> 00:01:25.500 + +That's nothing like a willow. + +00:01:25.500 --> 00:01:29.500 + +Well it doesn't matter, anyway. I can hit it seven times out of ten, that's the point. + +00:01:29.500 --> 00:01:31.000 + +Never a willow. + +00:01:31.000 --> 00:01:39.000 + +Shut up! This is a hold-up, not a botany lesson. Right, now my fine friends, no false moves please. I want you to hand over all the lupins you've got. + +00:01:39.000 --> 00:01:40.500 + +Lupins? + +00:01:40.500 --> 00:01:43.000 + +Yes, lupins. Come on, come on. + +00:01:43.000 --> 00:01:45.500 + +What do you mean, lupins? + +00:01:45.500 --> 00:01:47.500 + +Don't try to play for time. + +00:01:47.500 --> 00:01:50.500 + +I'm not, you mean the flower lupin? + +00:01:50.500 --> 00:01:51.500 + +Yes, that's right. + +00:01:51.500 --> 00:01:54.000 + +Well, we haven't got any lupins. + +00:01:54.000 --> 00:01:55.000 + +Honestly. + +00:01:55.000 --> 00:02:04.000 + +Look, my fine friends. I happen to know that this is the Lupin Express. + +00:02:04.000 --> 00:02:05.500 + +You must be out of your tiny mind. + +00:02:05.500 --> 00:02:16.000 +[Action] Passengers out; Moore ransacks coach; emerges with enormous armful of lupins; mounts horse.] Just as I thought. Not clever enough, my fine friends. Come on, Concorde. + +00:02:16.000 --> 00:02:18.500 + +Well, so much for the lupins. + +00:02:18.500 --> 00:02:40.000 +[Song] Dennis Moore theme over montage to peasant hut; peasants receive lupins neutrally. + +00:02:40.000 --> 00:02:42.000 + +Here we are, I'll be back. + +00:02:42.000 --> 00:02:46.000 +[Caption] THE END. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_37_-_Episode_Thirty-seven/3_What_the_stars_foretell.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_37_-_Episode_Thirty-seven/3_What_the_stars_foretell.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..acaae901 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_37_-_Episode_Thirty-seven/3_What_the_stars_foretell.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,145 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Anchor #3: Mrs Trepidatious and horoscope word-sheet gag. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:05.000 +[Action] Pull back to reveal 'The End' is on TV in Mrs Trepidatious's house; another old woman enters and sits opposite. + +00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:07.500 + +Morning, Mrs Trepidatious. + +00:00:07.500 --> 00:00:12.000 + +Oh, I don't know what's good about it, my right arm's hanging off something awful. + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:14.000 + +Oh, you want to have that seen to. + +00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:19.000 + +What, by that Dr Morrison? He's killed more patients than I've had severe boils. + +00:00:19.000 --> 00:00:21.000 + +What do the stars say? + +00:00:21.000 --> 00:00:25.000 + +Well, Petula Clark says burst them early, but David Frost... + +00:00:25.000 --> 00:00:42.000 + +No, the stars in the paper, you cloth-eared heap of anteater's catarrh, the zodiacal signs, the horoscopic fates, the astrological portents, the omens, the genethliac prognostications, the mantalogical harbingers, the vaticinal utterances, the fatidical premonitory uttering of the mantalogical omens - what do the bleeding stars in the paper predict, forecast, prophesy, foretell, prognosticate... + +00:00:42.000 --> 00:00:45.000 +[Prop] Big sheet lowered with synonyms. + +00:00:45.000 --> 00:00:54.000 + +... forebode, bode, augur, spell, foretoken, [Audience joins in] presage, portend, foreshow, foreshadow, forerun, herald, point to, betoken, indicate! + +00:00:54.000 --> 00:00:55.500 + +I don't know. + +00:00:55.500 --> 00:00:58.000 +[Prop] Sheet raised again. + +00:00:58.000 --> 00:01:00.000 + +What are you? + +00:01:00.000 --> 00:01:01.500 + +I'm Nesbitt. + +00:01:01.500 --> 00:01:04.000 + +There's not a zodiacal sign called Nesbitt... + +00:01:04.000 --> 00:01:05.500 + +All right, Derry and Toms. + +00:01:05.500 --> 00:01:11.000 + +[Reading] Aquarius, Scorpio, Virgo, Derry and Toms. April 29th to March 22nd. Even dates only. + +00:01:11.000 --> 00:01:12.500 + +Well what does it presage? + +00:01:12.500 --> 00:01:22.000 + +You have green, scaly skin, and a soft yellow underbelly with a series of fin-like ridges running down your spine and tail. Although lizardlike in shape, you can grow anything up to thirty feet in length with huge teeth that can bite off great rocks and trees. You inhabit arid sub-tropical zones and wear spectacles. + +00:01:22.000 --> 00:01:24.000 + +It's very good about the spectacles. + +00:01:24.000 --> 00:01:25.500 + +It's amazing. + +00:01:25.500 --> 00:01:27.000 + +Mm ... what's yours, Irene? + +00:01:27.000 --> 00:01:28.000 + +Basil. + +00:01:28.000 --> 00:01:30.500 + +I'm sorry, what's yours, Basil? + +00:01:30.500 --> 00:01:33.500 + +No. That's my star sign, Basil... + +00:01:33.500 --> 00:01:35.000 + +There isn't a... + +00:01:35.000 --> 00:01:38.500 + +Yes there is ... Aquarius, Sagittarius, Derry and Toms, Basil. June 21st to June 22nd. + +00:01:38.500 --> 00:01:40.000 + +Well, what does it say? + +00:01:40.000 --> 00:01:43.500 + +You have green, scaly skin and a series of yellow underbellies running down your spine and tail ... + +00:01:43.500 --> 00:01:45.500 + +That's exactly the same! + +00:01:45.500 --> 00:01:47.500 + +Try number one ... what's Aquarius? + +00:01:47.500 --> 00:01:49.000 + +It's a zodiacal sign. + +00:01:49.000 --> 00:01:52.000 + +I know that, what does it say in the paper Mrs Flan-and-pickle? + +00:01:52.000 --> 00:02:04.000 + +All right... Oh! It says, 'a wonderful day ahead'. You will be surrounded by family and friends. Roger Moore will drop in for lunch, bringing Tony Curtis with him. In the afternoon a substantial cash sum will come your way. In the evening Petula Clark will visit your home accompanied by Mike Samrues singers. She will sing for you in your own living room. Before you go to bed, Peter Wyngarde will come and declare his undying love for you. + +00:02:04.000 --> 00:02:06.000 + +Urghh! What's Scorpio? + +00:02:06.000 --> 00:02:12.000 + +Oh, that's very good. 'You will have lunch with a schoolfriend of Duane Eddy's, who will insist on whistling some of Duane's greatest instrumental hits. In the afternoon you will die, you will be buried...' + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_37_-_Episode_Thirty-seven/4_Doctor.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_37_-_Episode_Thirty-seven/4_Doctor.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..a52ed138 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_37_-_Episode_Thirty-seven/4_Doctor.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,76 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Anchor #4: Doctors as robbers; hospital shakedown. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:02.000 +[Action] A doctor is lowered on a wire. + +00:00:02.000 --> 00:00:03.500 + +Good morning. + +00:00:03.500 --> 00:00:05.500 + +Oh, morning, doctor. + +00:00:05.500 --> 00:00:09.000 + +How's the old arm this morning, Mrs Ikon? + +00:00:09.000 --> 00:00:11.500 + +Oh, it's still hanging off at the shoulder. + +00:00:11.500 --> 00:00:22.000 + +Good, well lets have a look at it, shall we? [Fumbles bag] Oh damn, damn, damn, damn... damn this wretched bag... oh the wretched, damn, bloody, little bag. It's the one thing I hate about being a doctor - it's this wretched bloody little bag! + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:28.000 +[Action] Smashes chair over bag; produces revolver; shoots lock; bag opens, stuffed with pound notes; finally produces stethoscope. + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:30.000 + +What's that doing here? + +00:00:30.000 --> 00:00:32.000 +[Action] Throws stethoscope out window; it lands on another doctor. + +00:00:32.000 --> 00:00:33.500 + +Eurgggh! + +00:00:33.500 --> 00:00:43.000 +[Action] First doctor dons black kid gloves; points gun.] Hand over the money. Come on, all of it! Yes, that seems to be OK. Right! I'll just test your reflexes! + +00:00:43.000 --> 00:00:47.000 +[Action] Opens mac like a flasher; they scream and jump. + +00:00:47.000 --> 00:00:53.000 + +Right, now then, everything seems to be OK, I'll see you next week. Keep collecting the pensions, and try not to spend too much on food. + +00:00:53.000 --> 00:00:55.000 + +Thank you, doctor. + +00:00:55.000 --> 00:01:05.000 +[Scene] Hospital ward; doctor rifles Mr Henson's jacket.] Morning, Mr Henson ... How are we today? OK, take it easy ... Expecting any postal orders this week? + +00:01:05.000 --> 00:01:06.500 + +Not too bad, doctor. + +00:01:06.500 --> 00:01:11.000 + +No. + +00:01:11.000 --> 00:01:12.500 + +Righto. + +00:01:12.500 --> 00:01:20.000 +[Action] Nurse gathers loose change; doctor to Mr Rodgers in traction.] Ah, Mr Rodgers, have you got your unemployment benefit please? Right. Well can you write me a cheque then... please? + +00:01:20.000 --> 00:01:26.000 +[Action] Patient writes cheque; doctor marks a money graph downward.] Thank you very much. Soon have you down to nothing. Ah, Mr Millichope. [SFX: coins clinking in saline drip] + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_37_-_Episode_Thirty-seven/5_'TV4_or_not_TV4'_diskussion.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_37_-_Episode_Thirty-seven/5_'TV4_or_not_TV4'_diskussion.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..badd0536 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_37_-_Episode_Thirty-seven/5_'TV4_or_not_TV4'_diskussion.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,69 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Anchor #5: The Great Debate: TV4 or not TV4? + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:05.000 +[Graphics] SUPER: 'THE GREAT DEBATE' 'NUMBER 31' 'TV4 OR NOT TV4?' Stern music; lights up on panel. + +00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:12.000 + +Hello. Should there be another television channel, or should there not? On tonight's programme the Minister for Broadcasting, The Right Honourable Mr Ian Throat MP. + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:24.000 + +Good evening. The Chairman of the Amalgamated Money TV, Sir Abe Sappenheim. The Shadow Spokesman for Television, Lord Kinwoodie. And a television critic, Mr Patrick Loone. + +00:00:24.000 --> 00:00:27.000 + +Good evening. + +00:00:27.000 --> 00:00:29.000 + +Hello. + +00:00:29.000 --> 00:00:30.500 + +Hello. + +00:00:30.500 --> 00:00:34.000 + +Gentlemen - should there be a fourth television channel or not? Ian? + +00:00:34.000 --> 00:00:35.500 + +Yes. + +00:00:35.500 --> 00:00:37.000 + +Francis. + +00:00:37.000 --> 00:00:38.500 + +No. + +00:00:38.500 --> 00:00:40.000 + +Sir Abe? + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:41.500 + +Yes. + +00:00:41.500 --> 00:00:43.000 + +Patrick. + +00:00:43.000 --> 00:00:44.500 + +No. + +00:00:44.500 --> 00:00:46.500 +[Caption] YES 2 NO 2 + +00:00:46.500 --> 00:00:56.000 + +Well there you have it. Two say will, two say won't. We'll be back again next week, and next week's 'Great Debate' will be about Government Interference in Broadcasting and will be cancelled mysteriously. + +00:00:56.000 --> 00:01:05.000 +[Roller credits] Panelists gesticulate strangely in silhouette. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_37_-_Episode_Thirty-seven/6_Lupins.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_37_-_Episode_Thirty-seven/6_Lupins.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..e724bfdf --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_37_-_Episode_Thirty-seven/6_Lupins.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,195 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Anchor #6: TV continuity into 'George I' and Dennis Moore lupin raid in ballroom. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:10.000 + +Just starting on BBC 1 now, 'Victoria Regina'... On BBC 2 now Episode 3 of 'George I'... On ITV now the— Ugh! + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:14.000 +[Graphics] Royal crest; 'GEORGE I' with 'Charles' crossed out. CAPTION: 'EPISODE 3 - THE GATHERING STORM'. + +00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:20.000 +[Scene] Eighteenth-century ballroom; fop chats to two ladies. + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:23.000 + +Ah! 'Tis my lord of Buckingham. Pray welcome, Your Grace. + +00:00:23.000 --> 00:00:24.500 + +Thank you, Grantley. + +00:00:24.500 --> 00:00:30.000 + +Ladies, may I introduce to you the man who prophesied that a German monarch would soon embroil this country in continental affairs. + +00:00:30.000 --> 00:00:52.000 + +Madam, you will recall that prior to his accession our gracious sovereign George had become involved in the long standing Northern War, through his claims to Bremen and Verdun... The Treaty of Westphalia has assigned them to Sweden. + +00:00:52.000 --> 00:00:53.500 + +In 1648. + +00:00:53.500 --> 00:00:57.500 + +Exactly. + +00:00:57.500 --> 00:01:03.000 + +Meanwhile Frederick William of Denmark, taking advantage of the absence of Charles XII, seized them; 1712. + +00:01:03.000 --> 00:01:06.000 + +Oh yes! + +00:01:06.000 --> 00:01:08.000 + +It all falls into place. More wine? + +00:01:08.000 --> 00:01:11.000 + +Oh, thank you. + +00:01:11.000 --> 00:01:18.000 + +However, just prior to his accession, George had made an alliance with Frederick William of Prussia, on the grounds of party feeling. + +00:01:18.000 --> 00:01:21.000 + +While Frederick William had married George's only daughter. + +00:01:21.000 --> 00:01:23.000 + +I remember the wedding. + +00:01:23.000 --> 00:01:28.000 + +But chiefly through concern at the concerted action against Charles XII... + +00:01:28.000 --> 00:01:31.000 +[Action] Dennis Moore crashes through window on rope; guests gasp. + +00:01:31.000 --> 00:01:32.500 + +Stand and deliver. + +00:01:32.500 --> 00:01:34.500 + +Dennis Moore! + +00:01:34.500 --> 00:01:38.000 + +The same. And now my lords, my ladies ...your lupins, please. + +00:01:38.000 --> 00:01:39.500 + +Our what? + +00:01:39.500 --> 00:01:43.000 + +Oh, come come, don't play games with me my Lord of Buckingham. + +00:01:43.000 --> 00:01:45.000 + +What can you mean? + +00:01:45.000 --> 00:01:48.000 + +Your life or your lupins, my lord. + +00:01:48.000 --> 00:01:53.000 +[Action] Guests produce hidden lupins and assemble them into a bunch for Moore; he exits on rope; hooves gallop off. + +00:01:53.000 --> 00:01:58.000 + +He seeks them here ... he seeks them there ... he seeks those lupins everywhere. The murdering blackguard! He's taken all our lupins. + +00:01:58.000 --> 00:02:00.500 + +[Reveals a lupin from garter] Not quite. + +00:02:00.500 --> 00:02:03.000 + +Oh you tricked him! + +00:02:03.000 --> 00:02:06.000 + +We still have one! + +00:02:06.000 --> 00:02:18.000 +[Song] Dennis Moore rides montage; returns to peasant hut where peasants are surrounded by lupins; woman apparently dying; male peasant in lupin suit. + +00:02:18.000 --> 00:02:28.000 + +Try and eat some, my dear. It'll give you strength. Oh Mr Moore, Mr Moore, she's going fast. + +00:02:28.000 --> 00:02:30.500 + +Don't worry, I've... I've brought you something. + +00:02:30.500 --> 00:02:32.000 + +Medicine at last? + +00:02:32.000 --> 00:02:33.000 + +No. + +00:02:33.000 --> 00:02:34.500 + +Food? + +00:02:34.500 --> 00:02:35.500 + +No. + +00:02:35.500 --> 00:02:39.000 + +Some blankets perhaps... clothes... wood for the fire... + +00:02:39.000 --> 00:02:40.500 + +No. Lupins! + +00:02:40.500 --> 00:02:42.000 + +Oh Christ! + +00:02:42.000 --> 00:02:44.000 + +I thought you liked them. + +00:02:44.000 --> 00:02:48.000 + +I'm sick to bloody death of them. + +00:02:48.000 --> 00:02:49.500 + +So am I. + +00:02:49.500 --> 00:03:05.000 + +She's bloody dying and all you bring us is lupins. All we've eaten mate for the last four bleeding weeks is lupin soup, roast lupin, steamed lupin, braised lupin in lupin sauce, lupin in the basket with sauted lupins, lupin meringue pie, lupin sorbet... we sit on lupins, we sleep in lupins, we feed the cat on lupins, we burn lupins, we even wear the bloody things! + +00:03:05.000 --> 00:03:06.500 + +Looks very smart. + +00:03:06.500 --> 00:03:14.000 + +Oh shut up! We're sick to death with the stench of them. [SFX: cat miaow then bump] Look. The cat's just choked itself to death on them. I don't care if I never see another lupin till the day I die! Why don't you go out and steal something useful! + +00:03:14.000 --> 00:03:15.500 + +Like what? + +00:03:15.500 --> 00:03:19.000 + +Like gold and silver and clothes and wood and jewels and... + +00:03:19.000 --> 00:03:21.000 + +Hang on, I'll get a piece of paper. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_37_-_Episode_Thirty-seven/7_Ideal_Loon_Exhibition.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_37_-_Episode_Thirty-seven/7_Ideal_Loon_Exhibition.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..b1164434 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_37_-_Episode_Thirty-seven/7_Ideal_Loon_Exhibition.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,28 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Anchor #7: Exhibition of silly behaviour and judging. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:05.000 +[Action] Stock film: people queue at exhibition hall. + +00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:35.000 + +Well it may be the end of that, but it's certainly far from the end of - well in fact it's the beginning - well not quite the beginning - well certainly nearer the beginning than the end - well yes damn it, it is to all intents and purposes the beginning of this year's Ideal Loon Exhibition, sponsored by the 'Daily Express'. Numbskulls and boobies from all over the country have been arriving... + +00:00:35.000 --> 00:01:25.000 +[Montage exhibits] Kevin Bruce, digger duffer (forehead on goldfish bowl); Norman Kirby behind screen with unclothed lady; Friends of the Free French Osteopaths count 'un, deux, trois'; Brian Broomers suspended over tin of condemned veal; Scotsman with Nae Trews exhibit sponsored by Natural Gas; Italian priests in custard discussing vital matters; Massed Pipes and Toilet Requisites counter-marching to Souza; Canadian Mounted Goose; crowds flocking. + +00:01:25.000 --> 00:01:28.000 + +But the climax of the whole event is the judging. + +00:01:28.000 --> 00:01:44.000 +[Catwalk] Mr Justice Burke parades with number 41; lineup of six judges in wigs and robes. + +00:01:44.000 --> 00:01:55.000 + +Mr Justice Burke. Well that's the last, and let's just see those last six once again. And the winner is - number 41, Mr Justice Burke. + +00:01:55.000 --> 00:02:12.000 +[Action] Winner bursts into tears; others sad. Newspaper front page: 'Justice seen to be done' / 'British Justice Triumphs'. Leads into animation. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_37_-_Episode_Thirty-seven/8_Off-Licence.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_37_-_Episode_Thirty-seven/8_Off-Licence.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..6d6d069e --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_37_-_Episode_Thirty-seven/8_Off-Licence.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,79 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Anchor #8: Poetical customer and Mr Bones; story segue to Dennis Moore. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:10.000 + +Yet fear, not like an aged florin, can so disseminate men's eyes, that fortune, straining at a kissing touch may stop her ceaseless search to sport amidst the rampant thrust of time, and bring the thing undone to pass by that with which the cock may chance an arm. + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:12.000 +[Reveal] Setting is an off-licence; Mr Bones behind the counter. + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:14.000 + +Well that's all very well, sir, but this is an off-licence. + +00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:16.000 + +Oh. Just a bottle of sherry then, please. + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:17.500 + +Certainly... Amontillado? + +00:00:17.500 --> 00:00:24.000 + +Yes, I think Amontillado, finely grown ... well chosen from the casque of Pluto's hills, cell'd deep within the vinous soil of Spain, wrench'd thence from fiery regions of the sun... + +00:00:24.000 --> 00:00:26.000 + +Yes, yes sir. Just one bottle? + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:28.500 + +Just one bottle. Just one jot. Just one tittle. That's the lot. + +00:00:28.500 --> 00:00:31.000 + +There we are, sir. That'll be a pound, please. + +00:00:31.000 --> 00:00:36.000 + +A pound a pound and all around abound / A pound found found / Lost lost the cost till was't embossed... + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:37.500 + +Excuse me, sir. + +00:00:37.500 --> 00:00:41.000 + +Yes, good victualler, nature's trencherman, mine honest tapster... + +00:00:41.000 --> 00:00:43.000 + +I was just wondering. Are you a poet? + +00:00:43.000 --> 00:00:47.000 + +No, no, I'm a solicitor... well versed within the written law of man, we can to those who need... + +00:00:47.000 --> 00:00:48.000 + +Oh shut up. + +00:00:48.000 --> 00:00:50.000 + +I'm sorry. I'm afraid I've caught poetry. + +00:00:50.000 --> 00:00:53.000 + +Oh really? Well, don't worry, sir - I used to suffer from short stories. + +00:00:53.000 --> 00:00:54.500 + +Really? When? + +00:00:54.500 --> 00:01:05.000 + +Oh, once upon a time ... there lived in Wiltshire a young Chap called Dennis Moore. Now Dennis was a highwayman by profession ... and for several months he had been stealing from the rich to give to the poor. One day... + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_37_-_Episode_Thirty-seven/9_Dennis_Moore__Stealing_from_the_poor.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_37_-_Episode_Thirty-seven/9_Dennis_Moore__Stealing_from_the_poor.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..74399091 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_37_-_Episode_Thirty-seven/9_Dennis_Moore__Stealing_from_the_poor.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,127 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Anchor #9: Peasants become rich; nobles impoverished; Moore keeps robbing. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:07.000 +[Action] Dennis arrives with swag; peasants now smartly dressed; cottage refurbished. + +00:00:07.000 --> 00:00:12.000 + +Here we are again, Mr Jenkins. There we are... I'll be back. + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:25.000 +[Cut] Ballroom stripped; guests in undergarments; watery soup with a lone lupin. + +00:00:25.000 --> 00:00:31.000 + +Meanwhile Frederick William bushy engaged in defending against the three great powers the province of Silesia... + +00:00:31.000 --> 00:00:35.000 + +... which he had seized in the War of the Austrian succession against his word. + +00:00:35.000 --> 00:00:37.000 + +Yes, I remember. + +00:00:37.000 --> 00:00:39.000 + +... was now dependent on Pitt's subsidies. + +00:00:39.000 --> 00:00:43.000 +[Action] Moore swings in; guests groan listlessly. + +00:00:43.000 --> 00:01:05.000 + +My lords, my ladies, on your feet, please. I must ask you to do exactly as I say or I shall be forced to shoot you right between the eyes. Well not right between the eyes... from my point of view, it's perfectly satisfactory... + +00:01:05.000 --> 00:01:07.500 + +What do you want? Why are you here? + +00:01:07.500 --> 00:01:12.500 + +Why are any of us here? I mean, when you get down to it, it's all so meaningless, isn't it? I mean what do any of us want... + +00:01:12.500 --> 00:01:14.500 + +No, no, what do you want now? + +00:01:14.500 --> 00:01:17.500 + +Oh I see, oh just the usual things, a little place of my own, the right girl... + +00:01:17.500 --> 00:01:20.000 + +No, no, no! What do you want from us? + +00:01:20.000 --> 00:01:22.000 + +Oh sorry. Your gold, your silver, your jewellery. + +00:01:22.000 --> 00:01:24.000 + +You've taken it all. + +00:01:24.000 --> 00:01:26.000 + +This is all we've got left. + +00:01:26.000 --> 00:01:29.000 + +That's nice. I'll have them. Come on. + +00:01:29.000 --> 00:01:31.000 + +You'd better take the bloody lupin too. + +00:01:31.000 --> 00:01:33.000 + +Thank you very much, I've gone through that stage. + +00:01:33.000 --> 00:01:43.000 +[Song montage] Dennis Moore rides; arrives at opulent hut stuffed with treasures. + +00:01:43.000 --> 00:01:45.000 + +What you got for us today then. + +00:01:45.000 --> 00:01:48.000 + +Well I've managed to find you four very nice silver spoons Mr Jenkins. + +00:01:48.000 --> 00:01:51.000 + +[Snatching] Who do you think you are giving us poor this rubbish? + +00:01:51.000 --> 00:01:56.000 + +Bloody silver. Won't have it in the house. And those candlesticks you got us last week were only sixteen carat. + +00:01:56.000 --> 00:01:59.500 + +Yes, why don't you go out and steal something nice like some Venetian silver. + +00:01:59.500 --> 00:02:02.000 + +Or a Velasquez for the outside loo. + +00:02:02.000 --> 00:02:03.500 + +Oh all right. + +00:02:03.500 --> 00:02:18.000 +[Song] Dennis Moore theme variant: 'He steals from the poor and gives to the rich — stupid bitch.' + +00:02:18.000 --> 00:02:21.000 + +What did you sing? + +00:02:21.000 --> 00:02:24.000 + +[Spoken] We sang... he steals from the poor and gives to the rich. + +00:02:24.000 --> 00:02:28.000 + +Wait a tic ... blimey, this redistribution of wealth is trickier than I thought. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_38_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/0_Episode38_head_tail.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_38_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/0_Episode38_head_tail.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..310618a8 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_38_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/0_Episode38_head_tail.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,32 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Intro titles and final continuity close. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:03.000 +[TITLE] Episode Thirty-eight + +00:00:03.000 --> 00:00:07.000 +[ACTION/ANIMATION] Wilson and Heath dance; nude organist hits a chord; announcer at desk; 'It's...' man. + +00:00:07.000 --> 00:00:09.000 + +And now… + +00:00:09.000 --> 00:00:10.500 + +It's… + +00:00:10.500 --> 00:00:14.500 +[ANIMATION] Series titles roll. + +00:00:14.500 --> 00:00:18.000 +[CREDITS] End segment: film of Edward Heath; 'Spot the Loony' buzzer; roll credits; BBC world symbol. + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:23.000 + +Next week on 'Book at Bedtime', Jeremy Toogood will be reading Anna Sewell's Black Bu…Bue…Burton…Blakc Bottoon… [FADE OUT] + +00:00:23.000 --> 00:00:30.000 + +But now, BBC Television is closing down for the night. Don't forget to switch off your sets. Goodnight. [ACTION] TV dot appears as set is switched off. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_38_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/10_Dad's_Doctors_(trail).vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_38_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/10_Dad's_Doctors_(trail).vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..63436416 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_38_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/10_Dad's_Doctors_(trail).vtt @@ -0,0 +1,18 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Continuity voice introduces 'Dad's Doctor'. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 + +Tomorrow night comedy returns to BBC TV with a new series of half-hour situation comedies for you to spot the winners. Ronnie Thompson stars in 'Dad's Doctor'… + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:08.000 +[ACTION] Cut to a doctor with no trousers. + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:10.000 +[CAPTION] 'DAD'S DOCTOR' + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:20.000 + +… the daffy exploits of the RAMC training school. He's in charge of a group of mad medicos, and when they run wild it's titty jokes galore. [ACTION] medical students run past waving bras. Newcomer Veronica Papp plays the girl with the large breasts. [ACTION] a young lady runs past wearing only briefs. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_38_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/11_Dad's_Pooves_(trail).vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_38_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/11_Dad's_Pooves_(trail).vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..3afb1157 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_38_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/11_Dad's_Pooves_(trail).vtt @@ -0,0 +1,17 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Continuity voice introduces 'Dad's Pooves'. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:03.000 +[ACTION] Kitchen set. Man in sexy female underwear (Terry Gilliam). Judge (Terry Jones) runs in with flowers. + +00:00:03.000 --> 00:00:05.000 +[CAPTION] 'DAD'S POOVES' + +00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:14.000 + +… the kooky oddball laugh-a-minute fun-a-plenty world of unnatural sexual practices. + +00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:17.000 +[ACTION] The first man spanks the judge with a string of sausages. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_38_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/12_Comedy_Ahoy_trails_montage.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_38_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/12_Comedy_Ahoy_trails_montage.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..99798d26 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_38_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/12_Comedy_Ahoy_trails_montage.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,38 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Continuity voice runs through a string of fictional shows. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:20.000 + +Week three brings a change of pace with a new comedy schedule. With Reg Cuttleworth, Trevor Quantas, and Cindy Rommel as Bob, in 'On the Dad's Liver Bachelors at Large', [ACTION] caption and several loony still photos of the cast … keeping the buses running from typical bedsit land in pre-war Liverpool. That's followed by 'The Ratings Game' - the loony life of a BBC programme planner with the accent on repeats. [ACTION] Michael's loony appears. + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:22.000 +[CAPTION] 'THE RATINGS GAME' + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:30.000 + +Edie Phillips-Bong plays Kevin Vole, the programme planner with a problem and his comic attempts to pass the time. Week six sees the return of 'Up The Palace'… + +00:00:30.000 --> 00:00:33.000 +[STOCK] Film of the investiture of the Prince of Wales. + +00:00:33.000 --> 00:00:35.000 +[CAPTION] 'UP THE PALACE' + +00:00:35.000 --> 00:00:42.000 + +… the zany exploits of a wacky Queen, and that's followed by 'Limestone, Dear Limestone'… + +00:00:42.000 --> 00:00:45.000 +[ACTION] Long shot of a cliff with two people high up on it. + +00:00:45.000 --> 00:00:47.000 +[CAPTION] 'LIMESTONE DEAR LIMESTONE' + +00:00:47.000 --> 00:00:56.000 + +… the wacky days of the late Pleistocene era when much of Britain's rock strata was being formed. All this and less on 'Comedy Ahoy'. But now, BBC Television is closing down for the night. Don't forget to switch off your sets. Goodnight. + +00:00:56.000 --> 00:00:59.000 +[ACTION] Little dot of a TV set being switched off. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_38_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/1_Party_Political_Broadcast_(choreographed).vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_38_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/1_Party_Political_Broadcast_(choreographed).vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..367d0597 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_38_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/1_Party_Political_Broadcast_(choreographed).vtt @@ -0,0 +1,104 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Includes stage directions and captions in brackets. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:03.500 +[CAPTION] 'A PARTY POLITICAL BROADCAST ON BEHALF OF THE CONSERVATIVE AND UNIONIST PARTY' + +00:00:03.500 --> 00:00:07.500 + +There now follows a Party Political Broadcast on behalf of the Conservative and Unionist Party. + +00:00:07.500 --> 00:00:12.000 +[ACTION] A politician sits on a chair in a rehearsal room (not revealed for first six lines). + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:26.000 + +Good evening. Figures talk. We have already fulfilled over three of our election pledges before the end of our second year of good Conservative rule. And, what is more [ACTION] gets up and starts dancing movements as he speaks: We hope … that in the aut-tumn we shall int-ro-duce leg-is-lat-tion in the House to bene-fit all those in low-er in-come groups. And fur-ther-more we hope… + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:29.500 +[ACTION] Choreographer enters. + +00:00:29.500 --> 00:00:36.000 + +No, no, no, no… look, luv, it's and… [ACTION] does the movements: one and two and three and four, and five and six and seven and down. + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:41.000 + +[ACTION] trying the last bit: … five and six and seven and down… it's so much harder with the words. + +00:00:41.000 --> 00:00:45.000 + +Well, don't think of them. Just count four in your head. + +00:00:45.000 --> 00:00:51.000 + +And … one and fur-ther two and three and … no, I can't really… + +00:00:51.000 --> 00:00:54.000 + +Yes, well come on and do it with me, come on. And … + +00:00:54.000 --> 00:01:01.000 +[ACTION] Both dance and chant: Fur-ther-more we hope that we can stop the ris-ing un-em-ploy-ment. [ACTION] they finish with finger on chin, as in a thirties musical. + +00:01:01.000 --> 00:01:05.000 + +And point 'unemployment' with your finger. + +00:01:05.000 --> 00:01:08.500 + +I see. I can do it when you're here. + +00:01:08.500 --> 00:01:17.000 + +I won't be far away. All right, Neville love, we're going from 'unemployment' through 'pensions' into 'good government is strong government' and the walk down, all right? And … cue, love. + +00:01:17.000 --> 00:01:24.000 + +And fur-ther-more we hope that we can stop the ris-ing un-em-ploy-ment at a stroke or e-ven quick-er. + +00:01:24.000 --> 00:01:28.000 +[ACTION] A line of six male dancers enter, doing high kicks and a dance routine. + +00:01:28.000 --> 00:01:40.000 + +And so when you get a chance to vote, +Kind-ly vote Con-ser-va-tive. +[ACTION] the politician joins in +Rising prices, unemployment, +Both stem from the wages spiral +Curb inflation, save the nation, +Join us now and save the economy. + +00:01:40.000 --> 00:01:44.000 +[ACTION] Awful wave and cheesecake smile at the end; they hold the pose. + +00:01:44.000 --> 00:01:52.000 + +That's where you'll get the bunting and the ticker tape, Chris. Right, big smiles, everybody, remember you're cabinet ministers. And relax. [ACTION] only now do they stop smiling and waving. Lovely, it's trans at eight, so nobody be late. + +00:01:52.000 --> 00:02:00.000 +[ACTION] Camera crabs away. Through an open door: two Labour MPs in leotards and leg warmers, one on points, another hands on hips. + +00:02:00.000 --> 00:02:08.000 + +We in the Lab-our Par-ty have al-ways made our po-si-tion quite clear… we have al-ways been op-posed to… + +00:02:08.000 --> 00:02:14.000 +[ACTION] Camera continues to crab away; reaches a door marked 'Star'. Zoom in and mix through to animation. + +00:02:14.000 --> 00:02:22.000 +[ACTION/ANIMATION] Wilson and Heath dance to 'The Dance of the Sugar Plum Fairy'. Cut to nude organist hitting a chord. Cut to announcer at desk. + +00:02:22.000 --> 00:02:24.500 + +And now… + +00:02:24.500 --> 00:02:26.500 + +It's… + +00:02:26.500 --> 00:02:32.000 +[ACTION/ANIMATION] Animated titles. Cut to studio silhouette: a man on a high stool with a book. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_38_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/2_A_Book_at_Bedtime___'Redgauntlet'.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_38_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/2_A_Book_at_Bedtime___'Redgauntlet'.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..ca19de65 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_38_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/2_A_Book_at_Bedtime___'Redgauntlet'.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,74 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Begins at the 'A BOOK AT BEDTIME' caption and includes the readers struggling with 'Redgauntlet'. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:03.000 +[CAPTION] 'A BOOK AT BEDTIME' + +00:00:03.000 --> 00:00:07.000 + +'Book at Bedtime'. Tonight Jeremy Toogood reads 'Redgauntlet' by Sir Walter Scott. + +00:00:07.000 --> 00:00:09.500 +[ACTION] The lights come up on the reader. + +00:00:09.500 --> 00:00:27.000 + +Hello. [ACTION] follows words closely with a finger, reading with great difficulty: The sunsoot… the siunsiett… the sunset! .. the sunset… waas… was was… the sunset was… deeing … d … ying dying… o … over… the … hile … hiel… heels … halls … hills! of… slow … Sol … way … Firth… The… love piper… the lone piper… the lone piper… on… the … bait … ly … ments … [ACTION] smiles nervously … of Edingrund … dydburing… Edingbir… Edinburgh! Castle … was… siluted … sil … sillhou… + +00:00:27.000 --> 00:00:30.000 +[ACTION] Another man enters, takes the book testily, stands by the chair, smiles apologetically at camera. + +00:00:30.000 --> 00:00:41.000 + +The sunset was dying over the hills of Solway Firth. The lone piper on the battlements of Edinburgh Castle was silhouetted against the crim … crim … crimisy… crimson! against the crimson strays … stree… + +00:00:41.000 --> 00:00:44.000 +[ACTION] A third reader enters and reads over his shoulder. + +00:00:44.000 --> 00:00:46.000 + +Streaked! + +00:00:46.000 --> 00:00:48.000 + +Streaked? + +00:00:48.000 --> 00:00:54.000 + +Crimson-streaked sky … in the shadows of… crrignu… + +00:00:54.000 --> 00:01:00.000 +[ACTION] They puzzle over the next word; all crowd around the book. A technician wearing headphones enters. + +00:01:00.000 --> 00:01:03.500 + +Cairngorm! In the shadows of Cairngorm! + +00:01:03.500 --> 00:01:07.000 + +In the shadows of Cairngorm, the l… layered… + +00:01:07.000 --> 00:01:11.500 +[ACTION] A second technician and a make-up girl enter. + +00:01:11.500 --> 00:01:14.000 + +Laird! The Laird of Monteu … Montreaux… + +00:01:14.000 --> 00:01:15.500 + +Montrose. + +00:01:15.500 --> 00:01:18.000 + +The Laird of Montrose! + +00:01:18.000 --> 00:01:19.500 + +Gal-lopped… + +00:01:19.500 --> 00:01:21.500 + +Galloped! + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_38_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/3_Kamikaze_Scotsmen.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_38_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/3_Kamikaze_Scotsmen.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..c5c4f055 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_38_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/3_Kamikaze_Scotsmen.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,197 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Begins with Edinburgh Castle scene and continues through Kamikaze Regiment training. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[ACTION] Mix through to Edinburgh Castle at dusk. Lone piper silhouetted against a crimson-streaked sky. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:08.500 +[MUSIC] Bagpipes play briefly. + +00:00:08.500 --> 00:00:12.000 +[ACTION] A scream; the piper disappears. + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:18.000 +[ACTION] Interior guardroom: ten kilted Scottish guardsmen with bagpipes in a line. Sergeant Major at door taps one on shoulder. + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:20.500 + +Next! + +00:00:20.500 --> 00:00:29.000 +[ACTION] Next piper goes outside; pipes start. Cut to battlements: piper plays then jumps off. Scream. Another piper emerges and repeats. + +00:00:29.000 --> 00:00:45.000 + +[V/O Scottish accent] Here on top of Edinburgh Castle, in conditions of extreme secrecy, men are being trained for the British Army's first Kamikaze Regiment, the Queen's Own McKamikaze Highlanders. [ACTION] there is a scream and a piper jumps off, another one emerges and starts to play. So successful has been the training of the Kamikaze Regiment that the numbers have dwindled from 30,000 to just over a dozen in three weeks. What makes these young Scotsmen so keen to kill themselves? + +00:00:45.000 --> 00:00:48.000 +[ACTION] Close-ups of soldiers. + +00:00:48.000 --> 00:00:50.000 + +The money's good! + +00:00:50.000 --> 00:00:54.000 + +And the water skiing! [ACTION] he falls down with a scream. + +00:00:54.000 --> 00:01:03.000 +[ACTION] Interior guardroom: now only six men plus RSM. Bagpipes and scream. RSM dispatches another man. A captain enters. Bagpipes again. + +00:01:03.000 --> 00:01:05.500 + +Ten-shun. + +00:01:05.500 --> 00:01:10.000 + +All right, sergeant major. At ease. Now, how many chaps have you got left? + +00:01:10.000 --> 00:01:12.000 + +Six, sir, + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:14.000 + +Six? [ACTION] there is a scream. + +00:01:14.000 --> 00:01:16.000 + +Five, sir. [ACTION] to another highlander carrying bagpipes: Good luck, Johnson. [ACTION] Johnson leaves. + +00:01:16.000 --> 00:01:22.000 + +Jolly good show, sergeant major. [ACTION] bagpipes start up outside. Well, I've come to tell you that we've got a job for your five lads. + +00:01:22.000 --> 00:01:23.500 +[ACTION] A scream. + +00:01:23.500 --> 00:01:25.000 + +Four, sir. + +00:01:25.000 --> 00:01:26.500 + +For your four lads. + +00:01:26.500 --> 00:01:30.500 + +[WHISPER] Good luck, Taggart. + +00:01:30.500 --> 00:01:34.000 + +Thank you, sarge. [ACTION] he goes. + +00:01:34.000 --> 00:01:41.000 + +[ACTION uncertain] Now this mission's going to be dangerous, [AUDIO] bagpipes start, and it's going to be tough, and we're going to need every lad of yours to pull his weight. [AUDIO] usual scream in background. Now, which … er … which four are they? + +00:01:41.000 --> 00:01:44.000 + +These three here, sir. OK. Off you go, Smith. + +00:01:44.000 --> 00:01:47.000 + +[MANIC] Right! [ACTION] Smith charges out before captain can stop him. + +00:01:47.000 --> 00:01:49.000 + +[MOUNTING CONCERN] … er … sergeant major! + +00:01:49.000 --> 00:01:52.000 + +Yes, sir? [AUDIO] bagpipes start outside. + +00:01:52.000 --> 00:01:56.000 + +You don't think it might be a good idea… er… to stop the training programme for a little bit? + +00:01:56.000 --> 00:01:58.500 + +They got to be trained, sir. It's a dangerous job. + +00:01:58.500 --> 00:02:01.500 + +Yes … I know… but… er … [AUDIO] the usual scream. + +00:02:01.500 --> 00:02:04.500 + +All right MacPherson, you're next, off you go. + +00:02:04.500 --> 00:02:07.000 + +You see what is worrying me, sergeant major, is… + +00:02:07.000 --> 00:02:09.500 + +I'll make it a gud'un, sir! [ACTION] dashes off. + +00:02:09.500 --> 00:02:11.500 + +Good luck, MacPherson. + +00:02:11.500 --> 00:02:17.000 + +Er… MacPherson… [AUDIO] bagpipes start up … only this mission really is very dangerous. We're going to need both the chaps that you've got left [AUDIO] scream. + +00:02:17.000 --> 00:02:19.500 + +Both of who, sir? + +00:02:19.500 --> 00:02:22.000 + +Sergeant major, what's this man's name? + +00:02:22.000 --> 00:02:24.000 + +This one sir? This one is MacDonald, sir. + +00:02:24.000 --> 00:02:28.000 + +No, no, no, no. [ACTION] Captain stops MacDonald who strains to get away. Hang on to MacDonald, sergeant major, hang on to him. + +00:02:28.000 --> 00:02:33.000 + +I don't know whether I can, sir… [ACTION] MacDonald's eyes stare strangely … he's in a state of Itsubishi Kyoko McSayonara. + +00:02:33.000 --> 00:02:34.500 + +What's that? + +00:02:34.500 --> 00:02:40.000 +[ACTION] Both struggle to restrain MacDonald. + +00:02:40.000 --> 00:02:46.000 + +It's the fifth state that a Scotsman can achieve, sir. He's got to finish himself off by lunchtime or he thinks he's let down the Emperor, sir. + +00:02:46.000 --> 00:02:48.500 + +Well, can't we get him out of it? + +00:02:48.500 --> 00:02:52.000 + +Oh, I dunno how to, sir. Our Kamikaze instructor, Mr Yashimoto, was so good he never left Tokyo airport. + +00:02:52.000 --> 00:02:55.000 + +Well, there must be someone else who can advise us? + +00:02:55.000 --> 00:03:02.000 +[ACTION] Exterior: 'Kamikaze Advice Centre' frontage. Bowler-hatted man enters. Receptionist at posh desk. + +00:03:02.000 --> 00:03:05.000 + +[BUSINESSLIKE] Good morning, Kamikaze, please. + +00:03:05.000 --> 00:03:07.000 + +[ACTION] indicates door: Yes, would you go through, please? + +00:03:07.000 --> 00:03:09.000 + +Thank you. + +00:03:09.000 --> 00:03:14.000 +[ACTION] Man opens door, walks through into nothing but sky and clouds; disappears. [AUDIO] Scream. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_38_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/4_No_time_to_lose.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_38_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/4_No_time_to_lose.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..3167871a --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_38_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/4_No_time_to_lose.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,177 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Includes the phrase coaching and consultant sequence. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:02.500 + +Right, sergeant major - there's no time to lose. + +00:00:02.500 --> 00:00:06.000 +[ACTION] RSM sits on MacDonald and strikes him on head. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:07.500 + +Beg pardon, sir? + +00:00:07.500 --> 00:00:09.500 + +No time to lose. + +00:00:09.500 --> 00:00:11.500 + +No what, sir? + +00:00:11.500 --> 00:00:14.000 + +No time … no time to lose. + +00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:18.000 + +Oh, I see, sir. [ACTION] making gestures: No time … to … lose!! + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:20.000 + +Yes, that's right, yes. + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:22.000 + +Yes, no time to lose, sir! + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:23.500 + +Right. + +00:00:23.500 --> 00:00:29.000 + +Isn't that funny, sir… I've never come across that phrase before - 'no time to lose'. Forty-two years I've been in the regular army and I've never heard that phrase. + +00:00:29.000 --> 00:00:32.000 + +Well, it's in perfectly common parlance. + +00:00:32.000 --> 00:00:33.500 + +In what, sir? + +00:00:33.500 --> 00:00:36.000 + +Oh never mind… right … no time to lose. + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:38.000 + +Eventually, yes, sir. + +00:00:38.000 --> 00:00:39.500 + +What? + +00:00:39.500 --> 00:00:44.000 + +Like you say, sir. We'll be able to make time, eventually without to lose, sir, no. + +00:00:44.000 --> 00:00:47.000 + +Look, I don't think you've quite got the hang of this phrase, sergeant major. + +00:00:47.000 --> 00:00:54.000 +[ACTION] Frontage: 'No Time To Lose Advice Centre'. Same bowler-hatted man goes in. Interior: consultant behind desk. + +00:00:54.000 --> 00:00:59.000 + +Morning, no time to lose … [ACTION] flashes card 'no time to lose'. Now then, how were you thinking of using the phrase? + +00:00:59.000 --> 00:01:02.500 +[ACTION] Pulls down blind reading 'no time to lose'; it rolls up fast. + +00:01:02.500 --> 00:01:08.000 + +Well, I was thinking of using it … er .. like .., well … 'good morning dear, what is in no time to lose?' + +00:01:08.000 --> 00:01:11.000 + +Er yes … well … you've not quite got the hang of that, have you. + +00:01:11.000 --> 00:01:16.000 +[ACTION] Produces two-foot cube labeled 'no time to lose'; points manically; words also on back of hand. + +00:01:16.000 --> 00:01:21.000 + +[SINGS] No time to lose, no time to lose, no time to lose, no time to lose. [ACTION] Stops manic fit; pours drink from bottle labeled 'no time to lose'. Now, you want to use this phrase in everyday conversation, is that right? + +00:01:21.000 --> 00:01:22.500 + +Yes, that's right. + +00:01:22.500 --> 00:01:24.500 + +Yes … good … + +00:01:24.500 --> 00:01:28.000 +[ACTION] Flings back of jacket up over head revealing 'no time to lose' written inside (upside down). + +00:01:28.000 --> 00:01:39.000 + +You see my wife and I have never had a great deal to say to each other … [MUSIC] tragic, heart-rending music creeps in … In the old days we used to find things to say, like 'pass the sugar'… or, 'that's my flannel', but in the last ten or fifteen years there just hasn't seemed to be anything to say, and anyway I saw your phrase advertised in the paper and I thought, that's the kind of thing I'd like to say to her… + +00:01:39.000 --> 00:01:44.000 +[ACTION] Consultant pushes down handle; large screen rises with 'no time to lose'. He bursts through paper. + +00:01:44.000 --> 00:01:50.000 + +Yes, well, what we normally suggest for a beginner such as yourself, is that you put your alarm clock back ten minutes in the morning, so you can wake up, look at the clock and use the phrase immediately. [ACTION] holds up card briefly. Shall we try it? + +00:01:50.000 --> 00:01:51.500 + +Yes. + +00:01:51.500 --> 00:01:56.000 + +All right - I'll be the alarm clock. When I go off, look at me and use the phrase, OK? [AUDIO] ticks then imitates ringing. + +00:01:56.000 --> 00:01:58.000 + +No! Time to lose! + +00:01:58.000 --> 00:02:00.000 + +No… No time to lose. + +00:02:00.000 --> 00:02:02.000 + +No time to lose? + +00:02:02.000 --> 00:02:03.500 + +No time to lose. + +00:02:03.500 --> 00:02:05.000 + +No time to lose. + +00:02:05.000 --> 00:02:07.500 + +No - to lose… like Toulouse in France. No time Toulouse. + +00:02:07.500 --> 00:02:09.000 + +No time too lose… + +00:02:09.000 --> 00:02:10.000 + +No time Toulouse. + +00:02:10.000 --> 00:02:11.500 + +No time Toulouse… + +00:02:11.500 --> 00:02:13.000 + +No! - no time to lose! + +00:02:13.000 --> 00:02:14.000 + +No - no time to lose! + +00:02:14.000 --> 00:02:18.000 +[ANIMATION] Toulouse-Lautrec in a wild-west gunfight. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_38_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/5_Penguins___BBC_programme_planners.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_38_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/5_Penguins___BBC_programme_planners.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..a375fd92 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_38_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/5_Penguins___BBC_programme_planners.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,143 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Starts at Penguins documentary and includes planners replaced by penguins. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 +[CAPTION] 'FRONTIERS OF MEDICINE PART 2' / 'THE GATHERING STORM' + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:08.000 +[ACTION] Presenter at desk. + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:38.000 + +Penguins, yes, penguins. What relevance do penguins have to the furtherance of medical science? Well, strangely enough quite a lot, a major breakthrough, maybe. It was from such an unlikely beginning as an unwanted fungus accidentally growing on a sterile plate that Sir Alexander Fleming gave the world penicillin. James Watt watched an ordinary household kettle boiling and conceived the potentiality of steam power. Would Albert Einstein ever have hit upon the theory of relativity if he hadn't been clever? All these tremendous leaps forward have been taken in the dark. Would Rutherford ever have split the atom if he hadn't tried? Could Marconi have invented the radio if he hadn't by pure chance spent years working at the problem? Are these amazing breakthroughs ever achieved except by years and years of unremitting study? Of course not. What I said earlier about accidental discoveries must have been wrong. Nevertheless scientists believe that these penguins, these comic flightless web-footed little bastards may finally unwittingly help man to fathom the uncharted depths of the human mind. Professor Rosewall of the Laver Institute. + +00:00:38.000 --> 00:00:41.000 +[ACTION] Cut to scientist with tennis courts in background, white coat. + +00:00:41.000 --> 00:00:42.500 +[CAPTION] 'PROF. KEN ROSEWALL' + +00:00:42.500 --> 00:01:00.000 + +[Australian accent] Hello. Here at the Institute Professor Charles Pasarell, Dr Peaches Bartkowicz and myself have been working on the theory originally postulated by the late Dr Kramer that the penguin is intrinsically more intelligent than the human being. + +00:01:00.000 --> 00:01:06.000 +[ACTION] Moves to large diagram held by tennis players in brown lab coats: comparative brain capacities (man larger than penguin). + +00:01:06.000 --> 00:01:14.000 + +The first thing that Dr Kramer came up with was that the penguin has a much smaller brain than the man. This postulate formed the fundamental basis of all his thinking and remained with him until his death. + +00:01:14.000 --> 00:01:16.000 +[ACTION] Flash cut: elderly man in tennis shirt and green eye shade gets an arrow in the head. + +00:01:16.000 --> 00:01:24.000 +[ACTION] Diagram now shows man and six-foot penguin. + +00:01:24.000 --> 00:01:34.000 + +Now we've taken this theory one stage further. If we increase the size of the penguin until it is the same height as the man and then compare the relative brain sizes, we now find that the penguin's brain is still smaller. But, and this is the point, it is larger than it was. + +00:01:34.000 --> 00:01:36.000 +[ACTION] Quick cut: tennis crowd 'oh' and applauding. + +00:01:36.000 --> 00:01:38.000 +[CAPTION] 'DR PEACHES BARTKOWICZ' + +00:01:38.000 --> 00:01:42.000 + +For a penguin to have the same size of brain as a man the penguin would have to be over sixty-six feet high. + +00:01:42.000 --> 00:01:46.000 +[ACTION] She moves and looks up at cut-out of lower part of sixty-six-foot penguin. + +00:01:46.000 --> 00:01:58.000 + +This theory has become known as the waste of time theory and was abandoned in 1956. [EDIT] Hello again. Standard IQ tests gave the following results. The penguins scored badly when compared with primitive human sub-groups like the bushmen of the Kalahari but better than BBC programme planners. [ACTION] refers to graph (bushmen 23, penguins 13, BBC planners 8). The BBC programme planners surprisingly high total here can be explained away as being within the ordinary limits of statistical error. One particularly dim programme planner can cock the whole thing up. + +00:01:58.000 --> 00:02:00.000 +[CAPTION] 'YOU CAN SAY THAT AGAIN' + +00:02:00.000 --> 00:02:04.000 +[ACTION] Tennis player in changing room takes off gym shoes; others discuss shots. + +00:02:04.000 --> 00:02:06.000 +[CAPTION] 'DR LEWIS HOAD' + +00:02:06.000 --> 00:02:18.000 + +These IQ tests were thought to contain an unfair cultural bias against the penguin. For example, it didn't take into account the penguins extremely poor educational system. To devise a fairer system of test, a team of our researchers spent eighteen months in Antarctica living like penguins, and subsequently dying like penguins - only quicker - proving that the penguin is a clever little sod in his own environment. + +00:02:18.000 --> 00:02:22.000 + +Therefore we devised tests to be given to the penguins in the fourth set … I do beg your pardon, in their own environment. + +00:02:22.000 --> 00:02:23.000 + +Net! + +00:02:23.000 --> 00:02:24.000 + +Shh! + +00:02:24.000 --> 00:02:30.000 +[ACTION] Professor and team surround penguins standing in a pool. + +00:02:30.000 --> 00:02:33.000 + +What is the next number in this sequence - 2, 4, 6. . . + +00:02:33.000 --> 00:02:35.000 +[ACTION] A penguin squawks. + +00:02:35.000 --> 00:02:38.000 + +Did he say eight? … [SIGH] + +00:02:38.000 --> 00:02:44.000 +[ACTION] Cut back to scientist. + +00:02:44.000 --> 00:02:55.000 + +The environmental barrier had been removed but we'd hit another: the language barrier. The penguins could not speak English and were therefore unable to give the answers. This problem was removed in the next series of experiments by asking the same questions to the penguins and to a random group of non-English-speaking humans in the same conditions. + +00:02:55.000 --> 00:03:02.000 +[ACTION] Professor and team now surround a group of foreigners standing in a pool, bewildered. + +00:03:02.000 --> 00:03:05.000 + +What is the next number? 2, 4, 6… [LONG PAUSE] + +00:03:05.000 --> 00:03:06.500 + +... Hello? + +00:03:06.500 --> 00:03:11.500 + +The results of these tests were most illuminating. The penguins scores were consistently equal to those of the non-English-speaking group. + +00:03:11.500 --> 00:03:20.000 +[ACTION] Foreigners have fish thrown at them to catch in mouths; a penguin sits at candlelit table with woman, waiter tries to take order. Cut to Dr Hoad taking a shower. + +00:03:20.000 --> 00:03:23.000 + +These enquiries led to certain changes at the BBC … + +00:03:23.000 --> 00:03:32.000 +[ACTION] Boardroom of BBC. Penguins at table with signs: 'Programme Controller', 'Head of Planning', 'Director General'. Penguins squawk. Cut to penguin pool. + +00:03:32.000 --> 00:03:34.000 + +While attendances at zoos boomed. + +00:03:34.000 --> 00:03:37.000 +[ACTION] Camera pans to sign: 'The programme planners are to be fed at 3 o'clock'. + +00:03:37.000 --> 00:03:41.000 + +Soon these feathery little hustlers were infiltrating important positions everywhere. + +00:03:41.000 --> 00:03:46.000 +[ANIMATION] Penguins infiltrate important positions everywhere. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_38_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/6_Unexploded_Scotsman.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_38_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/6_Unexploded_Scotsman.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..c1d88eec --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_38_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/6_Unexploded_Scotsman.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,80 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Begins at the Russo-Polish checkpoint and includes the disposal squad. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 +[CAPTION] 'MEANWHILE AT A CHECKPOINT ON THE RUSSO-POLISH BORDER' + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:09.000 +[ACTION] RSM Urdoch's lorry is checked by a penguin border guard; lorry drives past sign 'Russian bolder' corrected to 'border'. + +00:00:09.000 --> 00:00:11.000 +[CAPTION] 'THE KREMLIT' (corrected to 'KREMLIN') + +00:00:11.000 --> 00:00:16.000 +[ACTION] Two Russian majors in conference room. + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:20.000 + +Svientitzi hobonwy kratow sveguminurdy. + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:22.000 +[SUBTITLE] 'THESE ARE THE VERY IMPORTANT SECRET DOCUMENTS I WAS TELLING YOU ABOUT' + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:24.000 + +We must study them in conditions of absolute secrecy. + +00:00:24.000 --> 00:00:25.500 +[SUBTITLE in Russian] + +00:00:25.500 --> 00:00:27.000 + +[SPEAKS IN RUSSIAN] + +00:00:27.000 --> 00:00:28.000 +[SUBTITLE] 'WHAT?' + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:30.000 + +[LOOKING UP] Look out! + +00:00:30.000 --> 00:00:31.500 +[SUBTITLE] 'REGARDEZ LA!' + +00:00:31.500 --> 00:00:36.000 +[ACTION] MacDonald crashes through skylight, lands on table, lies rigid with knees drawn up. He ticks ominously. + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:38.000 + +He hasn't gone off. + +00:00:38.000 --> 00:00:40.000 +[CAPTION] 'ZE HABE NICHT GESHPLODEN' + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:42.000 + +[SPEAKS IN RUSSIAN] + +00:00:42.000 --> 00:00:45.000 +[SUBTITLE] 'QUICK! RING THE UNEXPLODED SCOTSMAN SQUAD' + +00:00:45.000 --> 00:00:47.000 + +Yes my General! + +00:00:47.000 --> 00:00:49.000 +[SUBTITLE in Chinese] + +00:00:49.000 --> 00:00:56.000 +[ACTION] Phone rings on a tree branch. Pull back: Scotsman lies on his back, knees drawn up, in a field. Two Russian bomb experts crawl towards him cautiously. + +00:00:56.000 --> 00:00:58.500 +[CAPTION] 'UNEXPLODED SCOTSMAN DISPOSAL SQUAD' + +00:00:58.500 --> 00:01:08.000 +[ACTION] They work on him; tense close-ups; sweating. Finally they remove his head. One rushes and places it in a bucket labeled 'Vodka'. + +00:01:08.000 --> 00:01:10.000 +[CAPTION] 'WHISKY' + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_38_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/7_Spot_the_Loony.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_38_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/7_Spot_the_Loony.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..4aed85e3 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_38_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/7_Spot_the_Loony.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,103 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Panel game includes film rounds, photo rounds, and historical adaptation. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[ACTION] On panel game set. Screen behind shows Scotsman bucket scene. Fade out screen as camera pans to presenter. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:16.000 + +And welcome to 'Spot the Loony', where once again we invite you to come with us all over the world to meet all kinds of people in all kinds of places, and ask you to … Spot the Loony! [MUSIC] crescendo. + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:18.000 +[CAPTION] 'ALL ANSWERS VERIFIED BY ENCYCLOPAEDIA BRITANNICA' + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:24.000 + +Our panel this evening… Gurt Svensson, the Swedish mammal abuser and part-time radiator. + +00:00:24.000 --> 00:00:29.000 +[ACTION] Cut to Svensson: standing on head on desk, legs crossed yoga-style, loincloth, high heels, megaphone strapped to head. + +00:00:29.000 --> 00:00:31.000 + +Good evening. + +00:00:31.000 --> 00:00:36.000 + +Dame Elsie Occluded, historian, wit, bon viveur, and rear half of the Johnson brothers… + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:42.000 +[ACTION] Dame Elsie parallel to ground in a concrete block on desk; fairy wings, striped t-shirt, flying gloves, goggles, green wig. + +00:00:42.000 --> 00:00:44.000 + +Good evening. + +00:00:44.000 --> 00:00:49.000 + +And Miles Yellowbird, up high in banana tree, the golfer and inventor of Catholicism. + +00:00:49.000 --> 00:00:53.000 +[ACTION] Man dressed as a rabbit, megaphone strapped to one eye. + +00:00:53.000 --> 00:00:54.500 + +Good evening. + +00:00:54.500 --> 00:01:04.000 + +And we'll be inviting them to… Spot the Loony. [AUDIO] phone rings; Presenter answers: Yes? Quite right … A viewer from Preston has correctly pointed out the entire panel are loonies. Five points to Preston. And on to our first piece of film. It's about mountaineering and remember you have to… Spot the Loony! + +00:01:04.000 --> 00:01:08.000 +[ACTION] Film of a mountain. Stirring music. + +00:01:08.000 --> 00:01:11.000 + +The legendary south face of Ben Medhui, dark … forbidding… + +00:01:11.000 --> 00:01:16.000 +[ACTION] In middle distance: two bushes. A loony in Roman toga, tam o'shanter, holding a cricket bat, runs from one bush to the other. [AUDIO] Loud buzz; film freezes. + +00:01:16.000 --> 00:01:21.000 +[ACTION] Pull out to studio: freeze frame behind presenter. Presenter on phone. + +00:01:21.000 --> 00:01:27.000 + +Yes, well done, Mrs Nesbitt of York, spotted the loony in 1.8 seconds. [STOCK] Women's Institute applauding. On to our second round, photo time. Look at photographs of Tony Jacklin, Anthony Barber, Edgar Allan Poe, Katy Boyle, Reginald Maudling, and a loony. All you have to do is … Spot the Loony! [ACTION] Photo of Anthony Barber; buzzer goes immediately. No … please don't ring in until you've seen all the photos. + +00:01:27.000 --> 00:01:36.000 +[ACTION] Photo sequence with quick projector sounds: Anthony Barber, Katy Boyle, Edgar Allan Poe, a loony head/shoulders (ping-pong eyes, teeth blacked; chest labeled 'A Loony'), Reginald Maudling, Tony Jacklin. [AUDIO] Buzzer. + +00:01:36.000 --> 00:01:41.000 + +Yes, you're right. The answer was, of course, number two! [STOCK] Women's Institute applauding. I'm afraid there's been an error in our computer. The correct answer should of course have been number four, and not Katy Boyle. Katy Boyle is not a loony, she is a television personality. + +00:01:41.000 --> 00:01:48.000 + +[FANFARE] Historical shield appears. [MUSIC] Historical pageant music. And now it's time for 'Spot the Loony, historical adaptation'. 'Ivanoe'… stirring medieval romance. All you have to do is, 'Spot the Loony'. + +00:01:48.000 --> 00:01:49.500 +[CAPTION] 'IVANOE' + +00:01:49.500 --> 00:01:55.000 +[ACTION] Butcher shop chaos: multiple loonies (enormous trousers; vest with tutu dancing with side of beef in tutu; oilskins with fairy wings flying; man as bee on counter; carrot loony saying 'pretty boy'). [AUDIO] cacophony; loud buzzes. + +00:01:55.000 --> 00:01:59.000 + +Yes, well done, Mrs L of Leicester, Mrs B of Buxton and Mrs G of Gotwick, the loony was of course the writer, Sir Walter Scott. + +00:01:59.000 --> 00:02:02.000 +[ACTION] Cut to Sir Walter Scott in his study, looking through papers indignantly. + +00:02:02.000 --> 00:02:05.000 + +I didn't write that! Sounds more like Dickens… + +00:02:05.000 --> 00:02:07.000 +[CAPTION] 'CHARLES DICKENS 1812 - 1870' + +00:02:07.000 --> 00:02:09.000 + +You bastard! + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_38_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/8_Rival_documentaries.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_38_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/8_Rival_documentaries.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..3aa01e1f --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_38_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/8_Rival_documentaries.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,123 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Two producers fight for the microphone across locations and vehicles. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 +[ACTION] Documentary producer on forested hillside. + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:16.000 + +Was Sir Walter Scott a loony, or was he the greatest flowering of the early nineteenth-century romantic tradition? The most underestimated novelist of the nineteenth century… [ACTION] another documentary introducer walks in and approaches. + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:19.000 + +Excuse me … [POINTS at microphone] can I borrow that, please. + +00:00:19.000 --> 00:00:20.500 + +… yes. + +00:00:20.500 --> 00:00:33.000 + +Thank you. [ACTION] Immediately starts own documentary: These trees behind me now were planted over forty years ago, as part of a policy by the then Crown Woods, who became the Forestry Commission in 1924. [ACTION] walks toward forest. The Forestry Commission systematically replanted this entire area… + +00:00:33.000 --> 00:00:34.500 + +Excuse me. + +00:00:34.500 --> 00:00:49.000 + +Sh! That's forty thousand acres of virgin forest. By 1980 this will have risen to two hundred thousand acres of soft woods. In commercial terms, a coniferous cornucopia… an evergreen El Dorado… [ACTION] first producer makes feeble grab for mike … a tree-lined treasure trove … No … a fat fir-coned future for the financiers … but what of the cost … + +00:00:49.000 --> 00:00:50.500 + +It's mine! + +00:00:50.500 --> 00:00:53.000 + +[TO FIRST PRODUCER] Go away … in human terms? Who are the casualties? + +00:00:53.000 --> 00:00:57.000 +[ACTION] First producer lunges, grabs mike; stops; camera stops with him. + +00:00:57.000 --> 00:01:03.000 + +For this was Sir Walter Scott's country. Many of his finest romances, such as 'Guy Mannering' and 'Redgauntlet'… + +00:01:03.000 --> 00:01:04.500 + +Give that back! + +00:01:04.500 --> 00:01:10.000 + +No. [ACTION] grapple; first producer just keeps hold as he goes down. Scott showed himself to be not only a fine… + +00:01:10.000 --> 00:01:15.000 +[ACTION] Second producer grabs mike and runs; camera follows. + +00:01:15.000 --> 00:01:22.000 + +[RUNNING] The spruces and flowers of this forest will be used to create a whole new industry here in… + +00:01:22.000 --> 00:01:25.000 +[ACTION] First producer tackles him rugby-style and grabs mike. + +00:01:25.000 --> 00:01:28.000 + +… also a writer of humour and… + +00:01:28.000 --> 00:01:32.000 +[ACTION] Both fight and roll around on ground. + +00:01:32.000 --> 00:01:35.000 + +Britain's timber resources are being used up at a rate of… + +00:01:35.000 --> 00:01:37.500 +[ACTION] First producer hits him, grabs mike. + +00:01:37.500 --> 00:01:40.000 + +One man who knew Scott was Angus Tinker. + +00:01:40.000 --> 00:01:46.000 +[ACTION] Sunlit university quad; gentle classical music. Tinker stands by pillar, tweed-suited academic. + +00:01:46.000 --> 00:01:47.500 +[CAPTION] 'ANGUS TINKER' + +00:01:47.500 --> 00:01:55.000 + +Much of Scott's greatest work, and I'm thinking here particularly of 'Heart of Midlothian' and 'Old Mortality' for example, was concerned with… [ACTION] a hand from behind pillar slowly goes for the mike … preserving the life and conditions of a… [ACTION] the mike is grabbed away. + +00:01:55.000 --> 00:02:02.000 + +Forestry research here has shown that the wholly synthetic soft timber fibre can be created… [ACTION] Tinker discovers forestry expert crouched; chases him into quad … leaving the harder trees, the oaks, the beeches and the larches… and the pines, and even some of the deciduous hardwoods. + +00:02:02.000 --> 00:02:04.500 +[CAPTION] 'A FORESTRY EXPERT' + +00:02:04.500 --> 00:02:10.000 + +This new soft-timber fibre would totally replace the plywoods, hardboards and chipboards at present dominating the… + +00:02:10.000 --> 00:02:18.000 +[ACTION] A Morris Minor speeds round the quad, passes in front; first producer's hand grabs the mike from car. Cut to interior of Morris Minor speeding into country; first producer glances over shoulder. + +00:02:18.000 --> 00:02:24.000 + +In the Waverley novels… Scott was constantly concerned to protect a way of life… + +00:02:24.000 --> 00:02:26.000 +[AUDIO] Bullet ricochet off car. + +00:02:26.000 --> 00:02:31.000 + +….safeguarding nationalist traditions and aspiration, within the necessary limitations of the gothic novel… + +00:02:31.000 --> 00:02:35.000 +[ACTION] 1930s open American gangster car chases; second producer shoots; cars race level; both scramble for microphone while speaking. + +00:02:35.000 --> 00:02:38.000 +[AUDIO] Cars disappear around corner; crash. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_38_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/9_Book_at_Bedtime_wrap_and_credits.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_38_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/9_Book_at_Bedtime_wrap_and_credits.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..dbada93c --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_38_Monty_Python's_Flying_Circus__Just_the_Words/9_Book_at_Bedtime_wrap_and_credits.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,24 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Ends of 'Redgauntlet' reading and closing credits gag. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[ACTION] Toogood surrounded by people, holding book very close, peering at print. MacDonald lies on the floor. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:10.000 + +Then… theen… the… the end! The End. [ACTION] looks up. + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:14.000 +[ACTION] Film (no sound) of Edward Heath. [AUDIO] 'Spot the Loony' buzzer. + +00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:20.000 +[ACTION] Roll credits. Cut to BBC world symbol. + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:27.000 + +Next week on 'Book at Bedtime', Jeremy Toogood will be reading Anna Sewell's Black Bu…Bue…Burton…Blakc Bottoon… [FADE OUT] + +00:00:27.000 --> 00:00:30.000 +[ACTION] Fade BBC world symbol back up. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_39__Grandstand/0_Episode39_head_tail.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_39__Grandstand/0_Episode39_head_tail.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..59ffb9ec --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_39__Grandstand/0_Episode39_head_tail.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,19 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated placeholder timings. Intro sequence and final award setup collected separately. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Thames Television logo and fanfare. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:10.000 +[caption] Episode Thirty-nine: Grandstand + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:18.000 +[action] Cut to David Hamilton presenting; leads into 'rotten old BBC programme'. + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:24.000 +[action] Nude man at the organ; 'And now…' / 'It's…' announcements. + +00:01:40.000 --> 00:02:06.000 +[action] Post-credits: Dickie introduces award for 'cast with the most awards award'; welcomes the cast of the Dirty Vicar sketch. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_39__Grandstand/10_Credits_of_the_Year.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_39__Grandstand/10_Credits_of_the_Year.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..52d51956 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_39__Grandstand/10_Credits_of_the_Year.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,51 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated placeholder timings. Episode credits roll and Dickie addresses the audience; remote to Bristol. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Credits roll over four screens of naughty activity to the 'Grandstand' signature tune. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:40.000 +[caption] GRANDSTAND | A BBC INSIDE BROADCAST | CONCEIVED WRITTEN AND PERFORMED BY MICHAEL PALIN AND MRS CLEESE; ERIC IDLE AND MRS PALIN; JOHN CLEESE AND MRS JONES; TERRY GILLIAM AND TERRY JONES AND MRS IDLE; GRAHAM CHAPMAN AND MR SHERLOCK | ALSO APPEARING CAROL CLEVELAND AND MR AND MRS AND MRS ZAMBESI | CARON GARDNER AND MR A. | MAKE-UP BY MISS GAFFNEY AND MR LAST | COSTUMES HAZEL PETHIG AND MR CLARKE | GRAPHICS BY BOB BLAGDEN AND 'NAUGHTY' ROSY | ANIMATIONS BY TERRY GILLIAM AND RABBI COLQUHOUN | FILM CAMERAMAN ALAN FEATHERSTONE AND MISS WESTON | FILM EDITOR MR RAY MILLICHOPE AND HIS ORCHESTRA | SOUND RICHARD CHUBB AND MRS LIGHTING | CHOREOGRAPHY BY JEAN CLARKE AND AN UNNAMED MAN IN ESHER | DESIGNED BY CHRIS THOMPSON AND MRS ARMSTRONG-JONES | PRODUCED BY IAN MACNAUGHTON AND 'DICKIE' | A BBC TV AND MRS THAMES PRODUCTION + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:48.000 +[action] Pull out from screen to awards set; Dickie works a stirrup pump which pumps tears via tubes. + +00:00:48.000 --> 00:01:06.000 + +There they go, the credits of the year. Credits that you and the Society voted as the credits that brought the most credit to the Society. Sadly, the man who designed them cannot be with us tonight, as he is at home asleep, but we are going to wake him up and tell him the good news. + +00:01:06.000 --> 00:01:14.000 +[action] Darkened bedroom. Light switches on. A man sits up. He has no clothes on. + +00:01:14.000 --> 00:01:18.000 + +Are you there in Bristol, Arthur Briggs…? + +00:01:18.000 --> 00:01:24.000 +[action] Briggs looks terrified. Another man is in bed with him. + +00:01:24.000 --> 00:01:28.000 +Oh, my God! [action] (pulls a sheet over the other man) + +00:01:28.000 --> 00:01:32.000 +[action] Cut back to Dickie. + +00:01:32.000 --> 00:01:36.000 + +And now for the moment you've all been waiting for… + +00:01:36.000 --> 00:01:40.000 +[caption] THE END + +00:01:40.000 --> 00:02:06.000 + +No, not that moment. Although that moment is coming, in a moment. The moment I'm talking about is the moment when we present the award for the cast with the most awards award, and this year is no exception. Ladies and gentlemen will you join me and welcome please, the winners of this year's Mountbatten trophy, Showbusiness's highest accolade, the cast of the dirty Vicar sketch. + +00:02:06.000 --> 00:02:16.000 +[action] Very patriotic music. The cast of the Dirty Vicar sketch enter, curtsy to Princess Margaret. Attenborough embraces them all. + +00:02:16.000 --> 00:02:24.000 + +Well now, let us see the performances which brought them this award. Let us see the Dirty Vicar sketch. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_39__Grandstand/11_The_dirty_vicar_sketch.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_39__Grandstand/11_The_dirty_vicar_sketch.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..7d6a9e14 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_39__Grandstand/11_The_dirty_vicar_sketch.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,116 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated placeholder timings. Edwardian tea room farce with 'Dirty Vicar'. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Two ladies taking tea in an Edwardian drawing room. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:12.000 + +Have you seen Lady Windermere's new carriage, dear? + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:16.000 + +Absolutely enchanting! + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:20.000 + +Isn't it! + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:24.000 +[action] Chivers the butler enters. + +00:00:24.000 --> 00:00:30.000 + +The new vicar to see you, m'lady. + +00:00:30.000 --> 00:00:34.000 + +Send him in, Chivers. + +00:00:34.000 --> 00:00:38.000 +Certainly, m'lady. [action] (he goes) + +00:00:38.000 --> 00:00:46.000 +[action] Enter a Swiss mountaineer in Tyrolean hat, lederhosen, haversack, icepick, etc. Followed by two men in evening dress. They look round and exit. + +00:00:46.000 --> 00:00:52.000 + +Now, how is your tea, dear? A little more water perhaps? + +00:00:52.000 --> 00:00:56.000 + +Thank you. It is delightful as it is. + +00:00:56.000 --> 00:01:04.000 + +The Reverend Ronald Simms, the Dirty Vicar of St Michael's … ooh! + +00:01:04.000 --> 00:01:08.000 +[action] Chivers is obviously goosed from behind by the Dirty Vicar. + +00:01:08.000 --> 00:01:16.000 + +Cor, what a lovely bit of stuff. I'd like to get my fingers around those knockers. + +00:01:16.000 --> 00:01:24.000 +[action] He pounces upon the second lady, throws her skirt over her head and pushes her over the back of the sofa. + +00:01:24.000 --> 00:01:28.000 + +How do you find the vicarage? + +00:01:28.000 --> 00:01:36.000 +[action] The vicar stands from behind the sofa, shirt open, hair awry; he reaches over, puts his hand down the first lady's front. + +00:01:36.000 --> 00:01:40.000 + +I like tits! + +00:01:40.000 --> 00:01:44.000 + +Oh vicar! vicar! + +00:01:44.000 --> 00:01:52.000 +[action] The vicar suddenly pulls back, looks around in dawning horror. + +00:01:52.000 --> 00:02:02.000 + +Oh my goodness. I do beg your pardon. How dreadful! The first day in my new parish, I completely … so sorry! + +00:02:02.000 --> 00:02:10.000 + +Yes. Never mind, never mind. Chivers - send Mary in with a new gown, will you? + +00:02:10.000 --> 00:02:16.000 +[action] The second lady struggles to her feet from behind the couch, completely dishevelled, gown ripped open. + +00:02:16.000 --> 00:02:20.000 + +Certainly, m'lady. + +00:02:20.000 --> 00:02:26.000 + +[to the second lady] I do beg your pardon … I must sit down. + +00:02:26.000 --> 00:02:30.000 + +As I was saying, how do you find the new vicarage? + +00:02:30.000 --> 00:02:34.000 +[action] They take their seats on the couch. + +00:02:34.000 --> 00:02:46.000 + +Oh yes, certainly, yes indeed, I find the grounds delightful, and the servants most attentive and particularly the little serving maid with the great big knockers, and… + +00:02:46.000 --> 00:02:58.000 +[action] He throws himself on the hostess across the tea table, knocking it over; they disappear over the back of the hostess's chair. Grunts etc. Enter Dickie applauding; audience applause. + +00:02:58.000 --> 00:03:10.000 + +Well, there we are, another year has been too soon alas ended and I think none more than myself can be happier at this time than I … am. + +00:03:10.000 --> 00:03:16.000 +[action] The cast of the sketch stand in a line at the back, looking awkward and smiling. Fade out. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_39__Grandstand/1_Thames_TV_introduction.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_39__Grandstand/1_Thames_TV_introduction.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..4fc9936f --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_39__Grandstand/1_Thames_TV_introduction.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,22 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated placeholder timings. Includes stage directions and captions in square brackets. Speaker names identified where possible. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Begin with Thames Television logo and fanfare. Cut to David Hamilton in their presentation studios. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:14.000 + +Good evening. We've got an action packed evening for you tonight on Thames, but right now here's a rotten old BBC programme. + +00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:18.000 +[action] Cut to the nude man at the organ. + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:21.000 + +And now… + +00:00:21.000 --> 00:00:24.000 + +It's… + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_39__Grandstand/2_Light_Entertainment_Awards.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_39__Grandstand/2_Light_Entertainment_Awards.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..e0141b0b --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_39__Grandstand/2_Light_Entertainment_Awards.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,38 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated placeholder timings. Awards ceremony setup with captions and Dickie Attenborough introduction. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 +[action] Cut to a photo of Piccadilly Circus. + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:10.000 +[caption] 'THE BRITISH SHOWBIZ AWARDS' | 'PRESENTED BY HRH THE DUMMY PRINCESS MARGARET' + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:22.000 +[action] Mix through to the dummy Princess Margaret at a desk for an awards ceremony. Two men in dinner jackets and a pantomime goose flank her. A screen is high above. Enter Dickie Attenborough. + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:01:16.000 + +Ladies and gentlemen, Mr Chairman, friends of the society, your dummy Royal Highness. Once again, the year has come full circle, and for me there can be no greater privilege, and honour, than to that to which it is my lot to have befallen this evening. There can be no finer honour than to welcome into our midst tonight a guest who has not only done only more than not anyone for our Society, but nontheless has only done more. He started in the film industry in 1924, he started again in 1946, and finally in 1963. He has been dead for four years, but he has not let that prevent him from coming here this evening. [action] (he gets out an onion and holds it to his eyes; tears pour out) Ladies and gentlemen, no welcome could be more heartfelt than that which I have no doubt you will all want to join with me in giving this great showbiz stiff. Ladies and gentlemen, to read the nominations for the Light Entertainment Award, the remains of the late Sir Alan Waddle. + +00:01:16.000 --> 00:01:36.000 +[action] Awful continuity music. Terrific applause. Attenborough weeps profusely. A man in a brown coat carries in a white five-foot plinth, followed by another man with a bronze funeral urn wearing a black tie. Stock film of audience standing in rapturous applause. The urn is placed on the plinth and a microphone in front of it. Slight pause. The urn clears its throat. + +00:01:36.000 --> 00:01:52.000 + +[voice] The nominations are Mr Edward Heath, for the new suit sketch, [action] (zoom quickly in to film on the screen of the lady of Brussels throwing ink all over Mr Heath; cut back to the hall for applause) Mr Richard Baker for Lemon Curry. + +00:01:52.000 --> 00:01:56.000 +[action] Cut to Richard Baker. + +00:01:56.000 --> 00:02:00.000 + +Lemon Curry? + +00:02:00.000 --> 00:02:04.000 +[action] Cut back to the urn. + +00:02:04.000 --> 00:02:14.000 + +And the Third Parachute Brigade Amateur Dramatic Society for the Oscar Wilde skit. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_39__Grandstand/3_Dickie_Attenborough.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_39__Grandstand/3_Dickie_Attenborough.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..9b3c7963 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_39__Grandstand/3_Dickie_Attenborough.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,11 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated placeholder timings. Continuation of awards ceremony with Dickie Attenborough. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Dickie weeping profusely; bunches of onions slung around his neck. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:32.000 + +Ladies and gentlemen, seldom can it have been a greater pleasure and privilege than it is for me now to announce that the next award gave me the great pleasure and privilege of asking a man without whose ceaseless energy and tireless skill the British Film Indusrty would be today. I refer of course to my friend and colleague, Mr David Niven. [action] (vast applause, a bit of emotion from Dickie) Sadly, David Niven cannot be with us tonight, but he has sent his fridge. [action] ('Around the world in eighty days' music; the fridge is pushed down by a man in a brown coat) This is the fridge in which David keeps most of his milk, butter and eggs. What a typically selfless gesture, that he should send this fridge, of all his fridges, to be with us tonight. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_39__Grandstand/4_Oscar_Wilde_sketch.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_39__Grandstand/4_Oscar_Wilde_sketch.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..b04fc901 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_39__Grandstand/4_Oscar_Wilde_sketch.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,166 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated placeholder timings. Period setting captions and witty exchanges among Wilde, Whistler, Shaw, and the Prince. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:05.000 +[action] Zoom in to overlay showing stock film of hansom cabs galloping past. + +00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:09.000 +[caption] LONDON 1895 + +00:00:09.000 --> 00:00:13.000 +[caption] THE RESIDENCE OF MR OSCAR WILDE + +00:00:13.000 --> 00:00:23.000 +[action] Suitably classy music. Mix to Wilde's drawing room: brilliantly dressed crowd laughing affectedly and drinking champagne. + +00:00:23.000 --> 00:00:31.000 + +My congratulations, Wilde. Your latest play is a great success. The whole of London's talking about you. + +00:00:31.000 --> 00:00:39.000 + +There is only one thing in the world worse than being talked about, and that is not being talked about. + +00:00:39.000 --> 00:00:55.000 +[action] Fifteen seconds of restrained and sycophantic laughter. + +00:00:55.000 --> 00:01:03.000 + +Very very witty … very very witty. + +00:01:03.000 --> 00:01:11.000 + +There is only one thing in the world worse than being witty, and that is not being witty. + +00:01:11.000 --> 00:01:26.000 +[action] Fifteen more seconds of the same laughter. + +00:01:26.000 --> 00:01:30.000 + +I wish I had said that. + +00:01:30.000 --> 00:01:38.000 + +You will, Oscar, you will. [action] (more laughter) + +00:01:38.000 --> 00:01:46.000 + +Your Majesty, have you met James McNeill Whistler? + +00:01:46.000 --> 00:01:50.000 + +Yes, we've played squash together. + +00:01:50.000 --> 00:02:04.000 + +There is only one thing worse than playing squash together, and that is playing it by yourself. [action] (silence) I wish I hadn't said that. + +00:02:04.000 --> 00:02:10.000 + +You did, Oscar, you did. [action] (a little laughter) + +00:02:10.000 --> 00:02:14.000 + +I've got to get back up the Palace. + +00:02:14.000 --> 00:02:24.000 + +Your Majesty is like a big jam doughnut with cream on the top. + +00:02:24.000 --> 00:02:28.000 + +I beg your pardon? + +00:02:28.000 --> 00:02:34.000 + +Um … It was one of Whistler's. + +00:02:34.000 --> 00:02:38.000 + +I never said that. + +00:02:38.000 --> 00:02:42.000 + +You did, James, you did. + +00:02:42.000 --> 00:02:47.000 +[action] The Prince of Wales stares expectantly at Whistler. + +00:02:47.000 --> 00:03:08.000 + +… Well, Your Highness, what I meant was that, like a doughnut, um, your arrival gives us pleasure and your departure only makes us hungry for more. [action] (laughter) Your Highness, you are also like a stream of bat's piss. + +00:03:08.000 --> 00:03:10.000 + +What? + +00:03:10.000 --> 00:03:16.000 + +It was one of Wilde's. One of Wilde's. + +00:03:16.000 --> 00:03:22.000 + +It sodding was not! It was Shaw! + +00:03:22.000 --> 00:03:30.000 + +I … I merely meant, Your Majesty, that you shine out like a shaft of gold when all around is dark. + +00:03:30.000 --> 00:03:34.000 +[action] (accepting the compliment) Oh. + +00:03:34.000 --> 00:03:42.000 + +[to Whistler] Right. Right? [to Prince] Your Majesty is like a dose of clap. + +00:03:42.000 --> 00:03:50.000 + +Before you arrive - before you arrive is pleasure, and after is a pain in the dong. + +00:03:50.000 --> 00:03:53.000 + +What? + +00:03:53.000 --> 00:03:58.000 + +One of Shaw's, one of Shaw's. + +00:03:58.000 --> 00:04:06.000 + +You bastards. Um … what I meant, Your Majesty, what I meant … + +00:04:06.000 --> 00:04:10.000 + +We've got him, Jim. + +00:04:10.000 --> 00:04:12.000 + +Come on, Shaw-y. + +00:04:12.000 --> 00:04:14.000 + +Come on, Shaw-y. + +00:04:14.000 --> 00:04:18.000 + +I merely meant … + +00:04:18.000 --> 00:04:20.000 + +Come on, Shaw-y. + +00:04:20.000 --> 00:04:24.000 + +Let's have a bit of wit, then, man. + +00:04:24.000 --> 00:04:26.000 + +Come on, Shaw-y + +00:04:26.000 --> 00:04:30.000 +[action] blows a raspberry + +00:04:30.000 --> 00:04:40.000 +[action] The Prince shakes Shaw's hand. Laughter all round. Link to animation for a few minutes, then back to Dickie Attenborough at the awards ceremony, now with onions around his neck. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_39__Grandstand/5_David_Niven's_fridge.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_39__Grandstand/5_David_Niven's_fridge.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..840d3c94 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_39__Grandstand/5_David_Niven's_fridge.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,12 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated placeholder timings. Fridge reads nominations for Best Foreign Film Director. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:10.000 + +Ladies and gentlemen, seldom can it have been a greater pleasure and privilege than it is for me now to announce that the next award gave me the great pleasure and privilege of asking a man without whose ceaseless energy and tireless skill the British Film Indusrty would be today. I refer of course to my friend and colleague, Mr David Niven. [action] (vast applause) Sadly, David Niven cannot be with us tonight, but he has sent his fridge. [action] (music; fridge pushed in by a man in a brown coat) This is the fridge in which David keeps most of his milk, butter and eggs. What a typically selfless gesture. + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:24.000 + +[voice] The nominations for the best Foreign Film Director are: Monsieur Richad Attenborough, Ricardo de Attenbergie, Rik Artenborough, Ri Char Dat En Bollo, and Pier Paolo Pasolini. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_39__Grandstand/6_Pasolini's_film_'The_Third_Test_Match'.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_39__Grandstand/6_Pasolini's_film_'The_Third_Test_Match'.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..fe611284 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_39__Grandstand/6_Pasolini's_film_'The_Third_Test_Match'.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,50 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated placeholder timings. Art film sequence followed by TV studio discussion with cricketers. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 + +Before we hear the joint winner, let's see the one that came sixth. Let us see Pier Paolo Pasolini's latest film. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:20.000 +[action] Close up of grass on cricket pitch. Insects buzzing. A cricket ball rolls into shot; a hand picks it up. Reveal bowler with fielders behind, shot from low angle. + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:24.000 +[caption] PASOLINI'S THE THIRD TEST MATCH + +00:00:24.000 --> 00:01:10.000 +[action] Surreal montage: skeleton on boundary in tattered cricket gear; flies louder; monks as wicket keeper and first slip laugh; wind and buzzing; bowler rubs ball; sweating close-ups; girl in pavilion licking lips; bowler runs, trampling nude couple; ball smashes stumps; silence; in slow motion bowler turns to umpire; umpire turns into a cardinal and holds up a cross like a dismissal sign. + +00:01:10.000 --> 00:01:18.000 +[action] Cut to vociferous group of cricketers in a TV studio, pads and white flannels, staggered rostra as in 'Talk-back'. Facing them is Pier Paolo Pasolini. + +00:01:18.000 --> 00:01:28.000 + +There's lots of people making love, but no mention af Geoff Boyott's average. + +00:01:28.000 --> 00:01:34.000 + +[accent] Who is-a Geoff Boycott? + +00:01:34.000 --> 00:01:38.000 +[caption] PIER PAOLO PASOLINI + +00:01:38.000 --> 00:01:44.000 + +And in t'film, we get Fred Titmus… + +00:01:44.000 --> 00:01:48.000 + +Si, Titmus, si, si… + +00:01:48.000 --> 00:01:52.000 +[caption] YORKSHIRE + +00:01:52.000 --> 00:02:06.000 + +…the symbol of man's regeneration through radical Marxism…fair enough…but we never once get a chance to see him turn his off-breaks on that Brisbane sticky. + +00:02:06.000 --> 00:02:16.000 + +Aye, and what were all that dancing through Ray Illingworth's innings? Forty-seven not out and the bird comes up and feed him some grapes! + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_39__Grandstand/7_New_brain_from_Curry's.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_39__Grandstand/7_New_brain_from_Curry's.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..4f1dbf8a --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_39__Grandstand/7_New_brain_from_Curry's.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,390 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated placeholder timings. Two Mrs Zambesis and a salesman install a budget brain device. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:08.000 +[action] Pull back to reveal TV set in ordinary sitting room. Two pepperpots (both Mrs Zambesi) watching. + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:12.000 + +What's on the other side? + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:18.000 +[action] Second Mrs Zambesi switches channels to Dickie Attenborough. + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:22.000 + +Nobody could be prouder than… + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:26.000 + +Ugh! [action] (she switches the set off) + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:32.000 + +Um, shall we go down and give blood? + +00:00:32.000 --> 00:00:38.000 + +Oh, I don't want a great bat flapping round my neck. + +00:00:38.000 --> 00:00:44.000 + +They don't do it like that! They take it from your arm! + +00:00:44.000 --> 00:00:50.000 + +I can't give it. I caught swamp fever in the Tropics. + +00:00:50.000 --> 00:00:56.000 + +You've never even been to the Tropics. You've never been south of Sidcup. + +00:00:56.000 --> 00:01:02.000 + +You can catch it off lampposts. + +00:01:02.000 --> 00:01:06.000 + +Catch what? + +00:01:06.000 --> 00:01:12.000 + +I don't know, I'm all confused. + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:18.000 + +You ought to go and see a psychiatrist. You're a loony. You might even need a new brain. + +00:01:18.000 --> 00:01:22.000 + +Oh, I couldn't afford a whole new brain. + +00:01:22.000 --> 00:01:28.000 + +Well, you could get one of those Curry's brains. + +00:01:28.000 --> 00:01:32.000 + +How much are they? + +00:01:32.000 --> 00:01:46.000 +[action] (picking up a catalogue) I don't know. I'll have a look in the catalogue. Here we are. (she thumbs through it) Battery lights, dynamo lights, rear lights, brains - here we are… + +00:01:46.000 --> 00:01:50.000 + +I'm still confused. + +00:01:50.000 --> 00:01:58.000 + +Oh, there's a nice one here, thirteen-and-six, it's one of Curry's own brains. + +00:01:58.000 --> 00:02:02.000 +[caption] OLD SKETCH WRITTEN BEFORE DECIMALISATION + +00:02:02.000 --> 00:02:08.000 + +That one looks nice, what's that? + +00:02:08.000 --> 00:02:12.000 + +That's a mudguard! + +00:02:12.000 --> 00:02:16.000 + +It's only eight bob. + +00:02:16.000 --> 00:02:20.000 +[caption] 1np = 2½op + +00:02:20.000 --> 00:02:40.000 + +Aw, I think it's worth the extra five bob for the brain. I'll give them a ring. [action] (she goes to the phone and dials one number) Hello, Curry's? I'd like to try one of your thirteen-and-sixpenny brains please. Yes… yes… yes, ye… um… (looks at her shoe) five-and-a-half… yes… thank you. (replaces phone) They're sending someone round. [action] (there is a knock at the door) + +00:02:40.000 --> 00:02:44.000 + +Oh, that was quick. Come in. + +00:02:44.000 --> 00:02:48.000 + +Er, hello Mr and Mrs and Mrs Zambesi? + +00:02:48.000 --> 00:02:52.000 + +Yes, that's right. Are you the man from Curry's? + +00:02:52.000 --> 00:02:58.000 + +No, I've just come to say that he's on his way. Would you sign this please. + +00:02:58.000 --> 00:03:04.000 +[action] He hands a bare leg severed from the knee downwards round the door. + +00:03:04.000 --> 00:03:06.000 + +Thank you very much. + +00:03:06.000 --> 00:03:12.000 +[action] (she takes the pen from him but drops it) Ooh! (she picks it up and signs the leg) + +00:03:12.000 --> 00:03:16.000 + +Thank you. Sorry to bother you. + +00:03:16.000 --> 00:03:18.000 + +Thank you. + +00:03:18.000 --> 00:03:20.000 + +Thank you. + +00:03:20.000 --> 00:03:22.000 + +Thank you. + +00:03:22.000 --> 00:03:26.000 +[action] The man goes. A knock at the door and he reappears. + +00:03:26.000 --> 00:03:30.000 + +Um, he's just coming now. + +00:03:30.000 --> 00:03:32.000 + +Thank you. + +00:03:32.000 --> 00:03:36.000 +[action] Another knock at the door. + +00:03:36.000 --> 00:03:38.000 + +Come in! + +00:03:38.000 --> 00:03:40.000 + +Here he is. + +00:03:40.000 --> 00:03:48.000 +[action] The door opens and a dummy salesman is flung in, carrying a briefcase. He flops on the floor. The two pepperpots examine him. + +00:03:48.000 --> 00:03:52.000 + +Hello … hello … + +00:03:52.000 --> 00:04:00.000 +[action] (picking up the dummy) That's not a proper salesman. (throws it down) I'm not buying one from him, he doesn't give you confidence. + +00:04:00.000 --> 00:04:08.000 + +He doesn't give me any confidence at all - he's obviously a dummy. I'll ring Curry's. [action] (she picks up the phone without dialing) Hello, Curry's - that salesman you sent round is obviously a dummy… Oh, thank you very much. (puts phone down) They're sending round a real one. [action] (a knock on the door) + +00:04:08.000 --> 00:04:12.000 + +Come in. + +00:04:12.000 --> 00:04:18.000 + +Good morning - Mr and Mrs and Mrs Zambesi? + +00:04:18.000 --> 00:04:20.000 + +Yes, that's right. + +00:04:20.000 --> 00:04:24.000 + +Yes, that's right … [aside, man's voice] Yes that's right. + +00:04:24.000 --> 00:04:28.000 + +[to dummy] All right, Rutherford, I'll take over. + +00:04:28.000 --> 00:04:34.000 +[action] He opens a box and produces a teapot-sized brain device with gadgets and wires. + +00:04:34.000 --> 00:04:36.000 + +Oh, that's nice. + +00:04:36.000 --> 00:04:40.000 + +Yes, we sell a lot of these. Right, shall we try a fitting? + +00:04:40.000 --> 00:04:44.000 + +Oh, do I have to have an operation? + +00:04:44.000 --> 00:04:48.000 +[action] He starts to put it on her head. + +00:04:48.000 --> 00:04:52.000 + +No, madam, you just strap it on. + +00:04:52.000 --> 00:04:56.000 + +Doesn't it go inside my head? + +00:04:56.000 --> 00:05:02.000 + +Not the Roadster, madam, no. You're thinking of the Brainette Major. + +00:05:02.000 --> 00:05:06.000 + +How much is that? + +00:05:06.000 --> 00:05:10.000 + +Forty-four-and-six. + +00:05:10.000 --> 00:05:14.000 +[caption] 44/6d = £2.22½p + +00:05:14.000 --> 00:05:18.000 + +Oh no, it's not worth it. + +00:05:18.000 --> 00:05:28.000 + +Not with the Curry's surgery we use, no, madam. [action] (he gets out some tools) Now then. The best bet is the Bertrand Russell Super Silver. That's a real beauty - 250 quid plus hospital treatment. + +00:05:28.000 --> 00:05:32.000 + +Oooh, that's a lot. + +00:05:32.000 --> 00:05:40.000 +It's colour. Right. [action] (twiddles knobs; lights flash) One, two, three, testing, testing. + +00:05:40.000 --> 00:05:44.000 + +Mince pie for me, please. + +00:05:44.000 --> 00:05:48.000 + +What did she say that for? + +00:05:48.000 --> 00:05:54.000 +Quiet please. It's not adjusted yet. [action] (more adjustments) + +00:05:54.000 --> 00:06:12.000 + +Oh, I am enjoying this rickshaw ride. I've been a Tory all my life, my life, my life. Good morning Mr Presley. How well you look, you look very well … our cruising speed is 610 miles per hour … well well well porridge … well well well, well, hello hello dear … hello dear! + +00:06:12.000 --> 00:06:16.000 +Right, one, two, three … [action] (adjusts a switch) + +00:06:16.000 --> 00:06:22.000 +… eight, seven, [action] (he adjusts another switch) four. + +00:06:22.000 --> 00:06:26.000 + +Oh, she never knew that before. + +00:06:26.000 --> 00:06:32.000 + +Quiet please. Mrs Zambesi, who wrote the theory of relativity? + +00:06:32.000 --> 00:06:36.000 + +I know! I know. + +00:06:36.000 --> 00:06:42.000 +Quiet, please! [action] (adjusts tuning control) + +00:06:42.000 --> 00:06:52.000 + +Einstane … Einstone … Einsteen … Einston … Einstin … Einsten … Einstein. + +00:06:52.000 --> 00:06:54.000 + +Good. + +00:06:54.000 --> 00:06:58.000 + +Noël Einstein. + +00:06:58.000 --> 00:07:02.000 + +Right. That'll be 13/6d please. + +00:07:02.000 --> 00:07:06.000 +[action] (paying him with invisible money) That's marvelous. + +00:07:06.000 --> 00:07:16.000 + +She can take it off at night, unless she wants to read, of course. And don't ask her too many questions because it will get hot. If you do have any trouble here is my card. [action] (hands dismembered part of an arm) Give us a ring - give us a ring, and either myself, or Mr Rutherford, [action] (picks up the dummy) Good Bye. + +00:07:16.000 --> 00:07:18.000 + +Thank you very much. + +00:07:18.000 --> 00:07:22.000 +[action] As soon as the door is shut, the man's head pops around. + +00:07:22.000 --> 00:07:24.000 + +He's gone now. + +00:07:24.000 --> 00:07:28.000 +[action] He withdraws head and shuts the door. + +00:07:28.000 --> 00:07:34.000 + +[tentatively] Shall we go down and give blood? + +00:07:34.000 --> 00:07:40.000 + +[glazed] Yes, please Mr Roosevelt, but try and keep the noise to a minimum. + +00:07:40.000 --> 00:07:44.000 + +I'll go and get your coat for you. + +00:07:44.000 --> 00:07:50.000 + +I'm quite warm in this stick of celery, thank you, Senator Muskie. + +00:07:50.000 --> 00:08:00.000 +[action] The pepperpots appear out of their gate and walk down the street. Follow closely. + +00:08:00.000 --> 00:08:04.000 + +[to neighbour] Stapling machine, Mr Clarke. + +00:08:04.000 --> 00:08:08.000 + +[explaining] New brain. + +00:08:08.000 --> 00:08:12.000 + +Stapling machine, Mrs Worral. + +00:08:12.000 --> 00:08:18.000 +[action] Cut to a pepperpot with identical brain strapped on head. + +00:08:18.000 --> 00:08:22.000 + +Stapling machine, Mrs Zambesi. + +00:08:22.000 --> 00:08:30.000 +[action] They pass a bus stop at which a penguin is reading a paper. One or two unexploded Scotsmen lie on the ground. + +00:08:30.000 --> 00:08:34.000 + +Are you sure that's working all right? + +00:08:34.000 --> 00:08:42.000 + +Yes, thank you dear. It's marvellous. I think if we can win one or two of the early primaries, we could split the urban Republican vote wide open. + +00:08:42.000 --> 00:08:46.000 + +Um…here we are then. + +00:08:46.000 --> 00:08:50.000 +[action] They go into a door marked 'Blood Donors'. + +00:08:50.000 --> 00:08:56.000 + +Well being President of the United States is something that I shall have to think about. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_39__Grandstand/8_Blood_donor.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_39__Grandstand/8_Blood_donor.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..ebec2a64 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_39__Grandstand/8_Blood_donor.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,156 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated placeholder timings. Grimshaw negotiates bodily fluids with Samson at the blood bank. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:08.000 +[action] Hospital lobby. Line of people ushered through. Sign: 'Blood Donors' with arrow. Mr Samson in a white coat. + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:12.000 + +Blood donors that way, please. + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:16.000 + +Oh thank you very much [action] (joins the line). + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:40.000 + +Thank you. [action] Grimshaw whispers in Samson's ear; Samson looks slightly surprised. What? [action] Grimshaw whispers again. No. No, I'm sorry but no. [action] Whisper. No, you may not give urine instead of blood. [action] Whisper. No, well, I don't care if you want to. [action] Whisper. No. There is no such thing as a urine bank. + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:42.000 + +Please. + +00:00:42.000 --> 00:00:48.000 + +No. We have no call for it. We've quite enough of it without volunteers coming in here donating it. + +00:00:48.000 --> 00:00:52.000 + +Just a specimen. + +00:00:52.000 --> 00:00:58.000 + +No, we don't want a specimen. We either want your blood or nothing. + +00:00:58.000 --> 00:01:04.000 + +I'll give you some blood if you'll give me… + +00:01:04.000 --> 00:01:06.000 + +What? + +00:01:06.000 --> 00:01:10.000 + +A thing to do some urine in. + +00:01:10.000 --> 00:01:14.000 + +No, no, just go away please. + +00:01:14.000 --> 00:01:18.000 + +Anyway, I don't want to give you any blood. + +00:01:18.000 --> 00:01:22.000 + +Fine, well you don't have to, you see, just go away. + +00:01:22.000 --> 00:01:24.000 + +Can I give you some spit? + +00:01:24.000 --> 00:01:26.000 + +No. + +00:01:26.000 --> 00:01:28.000 + +Sweat? + +00:01:28.000 --> 00:01:30.000 + +No. + +00:01:30.000 --> 00:01:32.000 + +Earwax? + +00:01:32.000 --> 00:01:36.000 + +No, look, this is a blood bank - all we want is blood. + +00:01:36.000 --> 00:01:40.000 + +All right, I'll give you some blood. + +00:01:40.000 --> 00:01:46.000 +[action] He holds out a jar full of blood. + +00:01:46.000 --> 00:01:50.000 + +Wher did you get that? + +00:01:50.000 --> 00:01:54.000 + +Today. It's today's. + +00:01:54.000 --> 00:01:58.000 + +What group is it? + +00:01:58.000 --> 00:02:02.000 + +What groups are there? + +00:02:02.000 --> 00:02:04.000 + +There's A… + +00:02:04.000 --> 00:02:06.000 + +It's A. + +00:02:06.000 --> 00:02:14.000 +[action] (sniffing the blood) Wait a moment. It's mine. This blood is mine! What are you doing with it? + +00:02:14.000 --> 00:02:16.000 + +I found it. + +00:02:16.000 --> 00:02:22.000 + +You found it? You stole it out of my body, didn't you? + +00:02:22.000 --> 00:02:24.000 + +No. + +00:02:24.000 --> 00:02:30.000 +No wonder I'm feeling off-colour. [action] (he starts to drink the blood; Grimshaw grabs the bottle) Give that back. + +00:02:30.000 --> 00:02:32.000 + +It's mine. + +00:02:32.000 --> 00:02:36.000 + +It is not yours. You stole it. + +00:02:36.000 --> 00:02:38.000 + +Never. + +00:02:38.000 --> 00:02:42.000 + +Give it back to me. + +00:02:42.000 --> 00:02:46.000 + +All right. But only if I can give urine. + +00:02:46.000 --> 00:02:50.000 + +…Get in the queue. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_39__Grandstand/9_International_Wife-Swapping.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_39__Grandstand/9_International_Wife-Swapping.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..1427976b --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_39__Grandstand/9_International_Wife-Swapping.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,113 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated placeholder timings. Sports broadcast parody covering wife-swapping races and team events. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:10.000 +[action] John Rickman type with hat; course rails behind. + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:26.000 + +Good afternoon and welcome to Wife-Swapping from Redcar. And the big news this morning is that the British boy Boris Rodgers has succeeded in swapping his nine-stone Welsh-born wife for a Ford Popular and a complete set of Dickens. Well now, I can see they're ready at the start and so let's go now over for the start of the 3.30. + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:32.000 +[action] High shot of a street with about ten houses on each side. + +00:00:32.000 --> 00:00:38.000 + +And first let's catch up with the latest news of the betting. + +00:00:38.000 --> 00:00:46.000 +[caption] NO. 12 BETTY PARKINSON 7/4 ON FAV | NO. 27 MRS E. COLYER 9/4 | NO. 14 MRS CASEY 4/1 | 5/1 BAR + +00:00:46.000 --> 00:00:54.000 + +Number 12 Betty Parkinson 7 to 4 on favourite, number 27 Mrs Colyer 9 to 4, 5 to 1 bar those. + +00:00:54.000 --> 00:01:02.000 +And here's the starter Mrs Alec Marsh, [action] (she climbs onto a rostrum and fires a gun) and they're off. + +00:01:02.000 --> 00:01:24.000 +[action] Doors open up and down the street; ladies criss-cross between houses. About twenty seconds of high activity. + +00:01:24.000 --> 00:02:10.000 + +And Mrs Rodgers is the frirst to show, there she goes into Mr Johnson's, and Mrs Johnson across too Mr Colyer, followed closely by Mrs Casey on the inside. Mrs Parkinson, number 12, going well there into Mr Webster's from the Co-op, Mrs Colyer's making ground fast after a poor start, she's out of Mr Casey's into Mr Parkinson's, she's a couple og lengths ahead of Mrs Johnson who's still not out of Mr Casey's. Mrs Penguin and Mrs Colyer - these two now at the head of the field from Mrs Brown, Mrs Atkins, Mrs Parkinson, Mrs Warner and Mrs Rudd - all still at Mr Phillip's. Mrs Penguin making the running now, challenged strongly by Mrs Casey, Mars Casey coming very fast on the inside, it's going to be Mrs Casey coming from behind. Now she's making a break on the outside, Mrs Penguin running…and at the line it's Mrs Casey who's got it by a short head from Mrs Penguin in second place, Mrs Parkinson in third, Mrs Rudd, Mrs Colyer, Mrs Warner and there's Mrs Griffiths who's remained unswapped. + +00:02:10.000 --> 00:02:16.000 +[action] One lady is left in the middle of the road. Cut back to Rickman at the course railing. + +00:02:16.000 --> 00:02:24.000 + +Well, a very exciting race there, and I have with me now the man who owned and trained the winner, Mrs Casey - Mr Casey. Well done, Jack. + +00:02:24.000 --> 00:02:26.000 + +Thank you, John. + +00:02:26.000 --> 00:02:32.000 + +Well, were you at all surprised about this, Jack? + +00:02:32.000 --> 00:02:44.000 + +No, not really, no she's been going very well in training, and at Doncaster last week, and I fancy her very strongly for the Cheltenham weekend. + +00:02:44.000 --> 00:02:54.000 + +Well, thank you very much indeed, Jack. We must leave you now because it's time for the team event. + +00:02:54.000 --> 00:03:04.000 +[action] Peter West type in white DJ at ballroom side table with dancers beside him. + +00:03:04.000 --> 00:03:12.000 +[caption] COME WIFE-SWAPPING - NORTH WEST V THE SOUTH EAST + +00:03:12.000 --> 00:03:36.000 + +Hello, and a very warm welcome from the Tower ballroom suite at Reading, where there's very little in it, they're neck and neck, crop and grummit, real rack and saddle, brick and bucket, horse and tooth, cap and thigh, arse over tip, they're absolutely birds of a feather, there's not a new pin in it, you couldn't get a melon between them. Well, now, everything rests on the formation event and here come North West with the Mambo. + +00:03:36.000 --> 00:03:42.000 +[action] Line of ballroom dancers led out. Four gentlemen and four ladies in each team. + +00:03:42.000 --> 00:03:46.000 + +Maestro, take it away, please. + +00:03:46.000 --> 00:04:04.000 +[action] Teams form two lines to dance; ladies in tulle, gents in tails with numbers. Banner: 'Mecca Wife-Swapping'. Mambo intro starts; after four bars, teams grapple and wrestle; vast orgy rolls across floor. + +00:04:04.000 --> 00:04:12.000 +[action] Cut quickly to Frank Bough in 'Sportsview' studio. + +00:04:12.000 --> 00:04:20.000 + +And now it's time for Rugby League, and highlights of this afternoon's game between Keighley and Hull Kingston Rovers. + +00:04:20.000 --> 00:04:28.000 +[action] Mud-caked rugby league players prepare for a scrum. + +00:04:28.000 --> 00:04:40.000 + +[voice] Well, good afternoon and as you can see, Hull Kingston Rovers are well in the lead, it's a scrum down on the twenty-five, Keighley's Tom Colyer with the put in, Mrs Colyer to be put. + +00:04:40.000 --> 00:04:52.000 +[action] Scrum half has a dummy woman tucked under his arm; he puts her into the scrum; after kicking she is heeled out. + +00:04:52.000 --> 00:05:08.000 + +And there goes his wife into the scrum. And Hull have got the heel against the head. Doing nicely with this scrum, some very good packing here. Warrington's picked her up, is he going to let her go, Wrigley's with him, grand lad is this. + +00:05:08.000 --> 00:05:24.000 +[action] Mrs Colyer is picked up by the scrum half who runs with her, handing off tackles, sidesteps and slips her to a back who runs through and touches her down between the posts; team hug each other. + +00:05:24.000 --> 00:05:30.000 + +Well, that was right on the whistle, Rovers walkin' it there, winnin' easily by twenty-six points to two. + +00:05:30.000 --> 00:05:36.000 +[action] Cut to Frank Bough again in 'Sportsview' set. + +00:05:36.000 --> 00:06:00.000 + +Just a reminder that on 'Match of the Day' tonight you can see highlights of two of this afternoon's big games. Mrs Robinson v Manchester United and Southampton v Mr Rogers, a rather unusual game that. And here's a late result…Convetry nil, Mr Johnson's Una three - Coventry going down at home, there. Just a little reminder that the next sport you can see on BBS 1 will be 9.20 on Wednesday night, when 'Wife Swapping with Coleman' comes live from my place. Till then, goodnight. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_40__The_golden_age_of_ballooning/0_Episode40_head_tail.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_40__The_golden_age_of_ballooning/0_Episode40_head_tail.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..7c0dc982 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_40__The_golden_age_of_ballooning/0_Episode40_head_tail.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,50 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Intro montage, titles, inter-episode voiceovers, and end credits compiled into a single head/tail file. Timings are placeholders. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:05.000 +[Animation] Balloons ascending. + +00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:08.000 +[Caption] 'THE GOLDEN AGE OF BALLOONING' + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:11.000 +[Caption] 'THE BEGINNINGS' + +00:06:50.000 --> 00:07:20.000 +[Caption] 'THE END' over picture of a balloon; superimposed 'THE GOLDEN AGE OF BALLOONING' over BBC2 logo. + +00:07:20.000 --> 00:09:00.000 + +Next week on 'The Golden Age of Ballooning', we examine the work of Girlsher and Coxwell... Also available is a life-size model frog which croaks the words 'The Golden Age of Ballooning'... and now, another chance to see a repeat... + +00:09:00.000 --> 00:09:10.000 +[Animation] Balloons ascending as before. + +00:09:10.000 --> 00:09:30.000 +[Caption] 'THE GOLDEN AGE OF BALLOONING' / 'EPISODE TWO: THE MONTGOLFIER BROTHERS IN LOVE' / 'NOT WITH EACH OTHER, OBVIOUSLY' + +00:23:20.000 --> 00:24:10.000 + +George III was arranged and composed by Neil Innes. He is available from the BBC price £4 or eight months' imprisonment. + +00:24:10.000 --> 00:24:25.000 +[Action] Credits end. Cut to BBC world symbol. + +00:24:25.000 --> 00:25:25.000 + +That was episode three of 'The Golden Age of Ballooning'... here is a Party Political Broadcast on behalf of the Norwegian Party. + +00:33:30.000 --> 00:34:00.000 +[Animation] Balloons as before; surgical instruments puncture the balloons. + +00:34:00.000 --> 00:34:10.000 +[Caption] 'GOLDEN AGE OF BALLOONING' / 'THE GOLDEN YEARS OF COLONIC IRRIGATION' + +00:34:10.000 --> 00:34:30.000 + +Mr and Mrs Rita Trondheim; Reginald Bo-sankway... + +00:34:30.000 --> 00:35:00.000 +[Caption] 'THE MILL ON THE FLOSS' / 'PART I: BALLOONING' as a Victorian couple rises slowly in the air. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_40__The_golden_age_of_ballooning/1_Montgolfier_Brothers.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_40__The_golden_age_of_ballooning/1_Montgolfier_Brothers.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..5d7e5acc --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_40__The_golden_age_of_ballooning/1_Montgolfier_Brothers.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,150 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit begins at anchor #1. Timings are placeholders; includes stage directions and captions. + +00:00:11.000 --> 00:00:25.000 +[Action] Cut to suburban bathroom. A plumber works awkwardly on the toilet. + +00:00:25.000 --> 00:01:00.000 + +(working away) The Golden Age of Ballooning can be said to begin in 1783… when the Montgolfier brothers made their first ascent in a fire balloon... + +00:01:00.000 --> 00:01:10.000 +[Music] Pleasant elegant eighteenth-century. [Action] Mix to French country-house interior; Joseph and Jacques at window; plumber works on piping. + +00:01:10.000 --> 00:01:18.000 + +This is a great moment for us, Joseph. + +00:01:18.000 --> 00:01:25.000 + +It is a great moment for France. + +00:01:25.000 --> 00:01:29.000 + +Ah, oui! + +00:01:29.000 --> 00:01:45.000 + +First ascent in a hot-air balloon, by the Montgolfier brothers - 1783 … I can see us now… just after Montesquieu and just before Mozart. + +00:01:45.000 --> 00:01:52.000 + +I think I'll go and wash … + +00:01:52.000 --> 00:01:56.000 + +Good luck. + +00:01:56.000 --> 00:02:06.000 + +Oh … it's quite easy, really … I just slap a little water on my face, then… + +00:02:06.000 --> 00:02:12.000 + +No… good luck for tomorrow. + +00:02:12.000 --> 00:02:22.000 + +Oh I see, yes. You too. Yours has been the work. + +00:02:22.000 --> 00:02:32.000 + +Let us hope for a safe ascent… and don't use my flannel. + +00:02:32.000 --> 00:02:45.000 + +You know, when you showed me the plans in Paris, I could not believe that we should be the first men who would fly. + +00:02:45.000 --> 00:02:50.000 + +Yes … it's wonderful. + +00:02:50.000 --> 00:02:57.000 + +I am so excited I could hardly wash. + +00:02:57.000 --> 00:03:05.000 + +Yes … I too have had some difficulty washing these past few days. + +00:03:05.000 --> 00:03:13.000 + +Still, what is washing when we are on the verge of a great scientific breakthrough? + +00:03:13.000 --> 00:03:16.000 + +Jacques… + +00:03:16.000 --> 00:03:19.000 + +Yes, Joseph… + +00:03:19.000 --> 00:03:33.000 + +I have not been washing very thoroughly for many years now. + +00:03:33.000 --> 00:03:42.000 + +What do you mean? You must have been washing your face? + +00:03:42.000 --> 00:03:58.000 + +Oh yes, my face, I wash my face… but my legs… my stomach … my chest, they're filthy. + +00:03:58.000 --> 00:04:08.000 + +Well, I don't wash my stomach every day. + +00:04:08.000 --> 00:04:22.000 + +(with increasing self-remorse) Ah, but you wash far more than me … you are the cleaner of the Montgolfier brothers. + +00:04:22.000 --> 00:04:28.000 + +This is nothing, Joseph… + +00:04:28.000 --> 00:04:35.000 +[Action] A very formal butler enters. + +00:04:35.000 --> 00:04:43.000 + +Monsieur Montgolfier.. A Mr Parfitt to see you, sir. + +00:04:43.000 --> 00:04:50.000 +[Action] Mr Bartlett's head appears round the door and corrects the butler in a stage whisper: 'No, no… no… Bartlett!' + +00:04:50.000 --> 00:05:20.000 + +[Comedy exchange] Mispronunciations leading to 'A Mr Bartl-ett to see you, sir.' + +00:05:20.000 --> 00:05:28.000 + +I don't want to see anyone, O'Toole… tell him to go away. + +00:05:28.000 --> 00:05:33.000 + +Thank you, sir. + +00:05:33.000 --> 00:05:40.000 + +Well, it's getting late. I must go and have a wash. + +00:05:40.000 --> 00:05:45.000 + +What will you be washing? + +00:05:45.000 --> 00:06:08.000 + +Oh … just my face and neck … perhaps my feet… and possibly … but no … no … lock up the plans, Joseph… tomorrow they will make us the toast of France... + +00:06:08.000 --> 00:06:20.000 +[Action] Men enter and briskly set up a screen and projector. Film plays: animation of two naked men boxing in a large tub of water. + +00:06:20.000 --> 00:06:50.000 + +So, on June 7th, 1783, the Montgolfier brothers had a really good wash… + +00:06:50.000 --> 00:06:55.000 +[Music] Crescendo. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_40__The_golden_age_of_ballooning/2_Louis_XIV.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_40__The_golden_age_of_ballooning/2_Louis_XIV.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..09ac747b --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_40__The_golden_age_of_ballooning/2_Louis_XIV.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,209 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit begins at anchor #2. Timings are placeholders; includes dialogue and stage direction. + +00:09:30.000 --> 00:09:36.000 +[Caption] 'LATER THAT EVENING' fade up Montgolfiers' sitting room; plumber working. + +00:09:36.000 --> 00:09:44.000 + +His Royal Majesty, Louis XIV of France. + +00:09:44.000 --> 00:09:48.000 + +[Aside] And Mr Bartlett. + +00:09:48.000 --> 00:10:00.000 +[Action] Fanfare. Enter Louis XIV and two tough advisers, resplendent in state robes. + +00:10:00.000 --> 00:10:08.000 + +Your Majesty. It's a great privilege. Welcome to our humble abode. + +00:10:08.000 --> 00:10:16.000 + +(broad Glaswegian) It's er… very nice to be here. + +00:10:16.000 --> 00:10:22.000 + +(calling) O'Toole. + +00:10:22.000 --> 00:10:26.000 + +Sir? + +00:10:26.000 --> 00:10:34.000 + +Claret for His Majesty please. + +00:10:34.000 --> 00:10:42.000 + +There's a Mr Barttett outside again, sir. + +00:10:42.000 --> 00:10:48.000 + +Not now, I can't see him, we have the King of France here. + +00:11:00.000 --> 00:11:10.000 + +Your Majesty. You had a pleasant journey, I trust? + +00:11:10.000 --> 00:11:20.000 + +Yes… yes, oh definitely… yes… yes. Oh aye, aye. + +00:11:28.000 --> 00:11:36.000 + +You have come from Paris? + +00:11:36.000 --> 00:11:40.000 + +Where? + +00:11:40.000 --> 00:11:52.000 + +From Paris… you have travelled from Paris? + +00:11:52.000 --> 00:12:02.000 + +Oh yes, we've come from Paris… yes… yes, yes, we've just come from… er… Paris… yes. + +00:12:04.000 --> 00:12:14.000 + +Sir? + +00:12:14.000 --> 00:12:18.000 + +Yes, O'Toole? + +00:12:18.000 --> 00:12:26.000 + +Which one is the claret, sir? + +00:12:26.000 --> 00:13:10.000 + +[Rapid directions] The claret is in the decanter… in the salle à manger… sideboard on your left… behind the door? No, on the sideboard… opposite the mirror… + +00:13:10.000 --> 00:13:20.000 + +Will you please tell Monsieur Joseph our guest is here. + +00:13:22.000 --> 00:13:36.000 + +Well… er… Mr Montgolfier… let's not beat around the bush … my… dukes and I are very busy men. What we'd like to do is see the plans of your proposed balloon… + +00:13:36.000 --> 00:13:44.000 + +Certainly, Your Majesty… I have them here ready prepared. + +00:13:44.000 --> 00:13:56.000 + +Oh, great …. then… what we would like to do … is er… to take them back with us for the Royal Archives of er… + +00:13:56.000 --> 00:13:59.000 + +France. + +00:13:59.000 --> 00:14:08.000 + +France, aye. + +00:14:08.000 --> 00:14:18.000 + +Well, it is indeed a great honour Your Majesty, that I cannot refuse. + +00:14:18.000 --> 00:14:24.000 + +Right! OK! Let's get 'em. + +00:14:24.000 --> 00:14:34.000 +[Action] Louis and dukes move to grab plans. Joseph enters in towel and bath hat. + +00:14:34.000 --> 00:14:39.000 + +Just a moment! + +00:14:39.000 --> 00:14:44.000 + +Joseph! + +00:14:44.000 --> 00:14:54.000 + +(indicating the king) This man is not Louis XIV! + +00:14:54.000 --> 00:15:08.000 + +I've been looking it up in my bath. Louis XIV died in 1717. It's now 1783! + +00:15:08.000 --> 00:15:16.000 + +Did I say Louis XIV? Oh, sorry, I meant Louis XV… + +00:15:16.000 --> 00:15:22.000 + +He died in 1774! + +00:15:22.000 --> 00:15:38.000 + +All right, Louis XVI!… listen to me, smartarse, when you're King of France,… you've got better things to do than go around all day remembering your bloody number. + +00:15:38.000 --> 00:15:45.000 +[Action] Louis butts Joseph sharply on the nose (Glaswegian style). + +00:15:45.000 --> 00:15:49.000 + +Aaaaaarh! + +00:15:55.000 --> 00:16:06.000 + +Right! You want to argue about numbers? + +00:16:06.000 --> 00:16:10.000 + +Er… no, no. + +00:16:10.000 --> 00:16:22.000 + +Right, well… let's get hold of the plans for the Royal Archives. We've got to get back to… er… + +00:16:22.000 --> 00:16:25.000 + +Paris. + +00:16:25.000 --> 00:16:32.000 + +Paris by tonight so get a move on. + +00:16:32.000 --> 00:16:40.000 + +Aaaargh! Ow! Ooooohh! + +00:16:40.000 --> 00:16:48.000 + +I got as far as the sideboard, sir… + +00:16:48.000 --> 00:17:00.000 +[Action] Louis and dukes grab plans and push past butler to open window as men in black set up projector and screen. + +00:17:00.000 --> 00:17:10.000 + +Stop them… oh! Ah… oooooohh! + +00:17:10.000 --> 00:17:22.000 + +(to Jacques) No news on the canal I'm afraid, sir, but apparently in India they're thinking of building a railway... + +00:17:22.000 --> 00:17:36.000 + +Stop… ow! Stop them, O'Toole for… oh! shit! God's sake… stop them, they've got the plans! + +00:17:36.000 --> 00:17:48.000 +[Action] Screen shows film of Louis and men racing through gardens away from Montgolfiers' home. + +00:17:48.000 --> 00:18:10.000 + +Will Louis XVI get away with the Montgolfiers' precious plans?... Watch next week's episode of 'The Golden Age of Ballooning'… Now! + +00:18:10.000 --> 00:18:20.000 +[Action] Cut to animation/titles as before. Music. [Caption] 'THE GOLDEN AGE OF BALLOONING' / 'EPISODE THREE: THE GREAT DAY FOR FRANCE' + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_40__The_golden_age_of_ballooning/3_George_III.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_40__The_golden_age_of_ballooning/3_George_III.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..b6fb94d8 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_40__The_golden_age_of_ballooning/3_George_III.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,239 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit begins at anchor #3. Timings are placeholders; includes TV discussion prologue and court of George III segment. + +00:18:20.000 --> 00:18:36.000 +[Action] TV discussion 'Derision': presenter and two opulent men. + +00:18:36.000 --> 00:18:52.000 +[Caption] 'SIR CHARLES DIVIDENDS' + +00:18:52.000 --> 00:19:20.000 + +… But now that the Government has collapsed … I feel we do need the stability and the breathing space that a military presence would provide. + +00:19:20.000 --> 00:19:26.000 + +Lord Interest? + +00:19:26.000 --> 00:19:34.000 +[Caption] 'LORD INTEREST' + +00:19:34.000 --> 00:19:58.000 + +Oh yes… I agree that the army should take over, but I think it should not interfere with the programme of street executions... + +00:19:58.000 --> 00:20:20.000 + +The Montgolfier brothers' plans did indeed turn up… six months later, and a long way from Paris, at the court of King George III of England. + +00:20:20.000 --> 00:20:26.000 +[Caption] 'THE COURT OF GEORGE III, 1781' + +00:20:26.000 --> 00:20:40.000 + +… Titty was very worried. Where could Mary be? He looked everywhere... + +00:20:40.000 --> 00:20:48.000 +[Action] Knock on door. Reader swiftly swaps book and continues in official tone. + +00:20:48.000 --> 00:20:58.000 + +… and so, Your Majesty, we the Commons do herein crave and beseech that… + +00:20:58.000 --> 00:21:02.000 + +Enter! + +00:21:02.000 --> 00:21:12.000 + +Your Majesty… Louis XVIII is here! + +00:21:12.000 --> 00:21:16.000 + +Who is Louis XVIII? + +00:21:16.000 --> 00:21:26.000 + +The King of France, Your Majesty! This is a great moment to have, sir. + +00:21:26.000 --> 00:21:32.000 + +There is no Louis XVIII. + +00:21:32.000 --> 00:21:46.000 +[Action] Scottish voice outside; Lord North checks, returns, then re-enters clutching bridge of nose after a headbutt. + +00:21:46.000 --> 00:21:54.000 + +Aaaaaaaaaaaaghh! Oh my God! Oh… ah… oh Christ! + +00:21:54.000 --> 00:22:06.000 +[Action] Louis strides in with two dukes wearing tam o'shanters. + +00:22:06.000 --> 00:22:28.000 + +(to the reader) Your Majesty, I am Louis XVI… Oh Christ… (to George III) Your Majesty… I am Louis XVI as you so rightly say, and I don't want to muck about. I have a wee proposition... + +00:22:28.000 --> 00:22:32.000 + +George III + +00:22:32.000 --> 00:22:38.000 + +George III! Sorry. Where can we talk? + +00:22:38.000 --> 00:22:46.000 + +Oh! God! … did you see that?… Oh!… aaaargh! + +00:22:46.000 --> 00:22:52.000 + +We shall have a state banquet at St James' Palace! + +00:22:52.000 --> 00:23:02.000 + +No no, look, I can't hang about. It's take it or leave… we got to get back to… er… + +00:23:02.000 --> 00:23:06.000 + +Paris. + +00:23:06.000 --> 00:23:12.000 + +Paris, by tonight… + +00:23:12.000 --> 00:23:20.000 + +Must you leave us, Louis? + +00:23:20.000 --> 00:23:30.000 + +I'd rather just sell the plans and nip off, Georgie boy. + +00:23:30.000 --> 00:23:42.000 + +All right… we will buy the plans… if you will undertake to disengage your troops in America. + +00:23:42.000 --> 00:23:48.000 + +Do what? + +00:23:48.000 --> 00:24:00.000 + +And, I shall give you £10,000 for the plans… + +00:24:00.000 --> 00:24:16.000 + +Ten thousand pounds! Right, well, we'll disengage the, urn, you know… like you said - we'll disengage 'em… tell you what, then, I'll put a duke on to it… + +00:24:16.000 --> 00:24:24.000 + +(still clutching his nose) That's the worst thing you can do to anybody. + +00:24:24.000 --> 00:24:30.000 + +You asked for it, sonny. + +00:24:30.000 --> 00:24:38.000 + +You could have broken my bloody nose! + +00:24:38.000 --> 00:24:44.000 + +North! Please! + +00:24:44.000 --> 00:24:52.000 + +North! Will you send for the Duke of Portland … we have a financial matter to discuss. + +00:24:52.000 --> 00:25:00.000 + +No, look, I think it's better if you give the money to us. We're going back. We've got a bag. + +00:25:00.000 --> 00:25:12.000 + +No, no… don't worry, Louis. We shall talk to your Monsieur Necker. + +00:25:12.000 --> 00:25:22.000 + +Ah! Well, actually, we'd rather you didn't… we've been having a wee bit of trouble with him… + +00:25:22.000 --> 00:25:36.000 + +Monsieur Necker? The man who introduced so many valuable reforms and who proved so popular despite his opposition to Mirabeau's policy of issuing 'assignats'? + +00:25:36.000 --> 00:25:42.000 +[Caption] 'THIS SPEECH HAS BEEN VERIFIED BY ENCYCLOPAEDIA BRITANNICA' + +00:25:42.000 --> 00:25:54.000 + +Er… aye, yeah… the trouble is he's been drinking a bit recently … you' know, fourteen lagers with his breakfast… + +00:25:54.000 --> 00:26:02.000 + +Well… very well, Louis… + +00:26:02.000 --> 00:26:08.000 +[Action] Door flies open; Joseph enters in towel and bath hat. + +00:26:08.000 --> 00:26:12.000 + +Just a moment! + +00:26:12.000 --> 00:26:16.000 + +Oh, Christ! + +00:26:16.000 --> 00:26:24.000 + +What are you doing? + +00:26:24.000 --> 00:26:36.000 + +I am Joseph Montgolfier, the inventor of the fire balloon. The man before you is an impostor! + +00:26:36.000 --> 00:26:42.000 + +Ooh! I am not … honestly! + +00:26:42.000 --> 00:26:56.000 + +No, not you, Your Majesty. This man - this Louis, the so-called King of France man. Which number did you give this time - Louis the 23rd? + +00:26:56.000 --> 00:27:02.000 + +I got it right! + +00:27:02.000 --> 00:27:10.000 + +Listen, you spotty sassenach pillock.. + +00:27:10.000 --> 00:27:18.000 + +(not a doctor but a period butler) Your Majesty! The Ronettes are here. + +00:27:18.000 --> 00:27:22.000 + +And Mr Bartlett. + +00:27:22.000 --> 00:27:40.000 +[Action] Three black ladies enter and sing 'George III' song; men set up screen. + +00:27:40.000 --> 00:27:52.000 +[Song] George III … etc …. etc …. + +00:27:52.000 --> 00:27:58.000 + +Oh dear, I'm not supposed to go mad till 1800! + +00:27:58.000 --> 00:28:10.000 +[Action] Louis argues with butler and butts him; music rises and sound fades on strange scene; George III falls and waggles legs; men in black reveal caption. + +00:28:10.000 --> 00:28:18.000 +[Caption] 'MEANWHILE, IN FRANCE…' + +00:28:18.000 --> 00:29:20.000 + +[Action] Back at Montgolfiers' house: Jacques works; Antoinette paces in harness; plumber still mending plumbing. Dialogue about Joseph gone six months; comic French flirtation; repeated butler applause gag. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_40__The_golden_age_of_ballooning/4_Party_Political_Broadcast_on_Behalf_of_the_Norwegian_Party.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_40__The_golden_age_of_ballooning/4_Party_Political_Broadcast_on_Behalf_of_the_Norwegian_Party.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..68a3be84 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_40__The_golden_age_of_ballooning/4_Party_Political_Broadcast_on_Behalf_of_the_Norwegian_Party.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,91 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit begins at anchor #4. Timings are placeholders; includes foreign language with subtitles. + +00:29:20.000 --> 00:29:36.000 + +That was episode three of 'The Golden Age of Ballooning'... Party Political Broadcast on behalf of the Norwegian Party. + +00:29:36.000 --> 00:29:44.000 + +Ik tvika nasai… + +00:29:44.000 --> 00:29:48.000 +[Subtitle] GOOD EVENING + +00:29:48.000 --> 00:30:00.000 + +…Stivianka sobjiord ki niyanska ik takka Norge weginda zokiy yniet… + +00:30:00.000 --> 00:30:06.000 +[Subtitle] YOU MAY THINK IT STRANGE THAT WE SHOULD BE ASKING YOU TO VOTE NORWEGIAN AT THE NEXT ELECTION + +00:30:06.000 --> 00:30:12.000 + +…Ik vietta nogiunda sti jibiora… + +00:30:12.000 --> 00:30:16.000 +[Subtitle] BUT CONSIDER THE ADVANTAGES + +00:30:16.000 --> 00:30:24.000 + +In Norge we hatta svinska offikiose buinni a gogik in Europa. + +00:30:24.000 --> 00:30:30.000 +[Subtitle] IN NORWAY, WE HAVE ONE OF THE HIGHEST PER CAPPA INCOME RATES IN EUROPE + +00:30:30.000 --> 00:30:38.000 + +Sti glikka in Norge tijik dinstianna gikloosi stijioska kary. + +00:30:38.000 --> 00:30:44.000 +[Subtitle] WE HAVE AN INDUSTRIAL RE-INVESTMENT RATE OF 14% + +00:30:44.000 --> 00:30:52.000 + +E in Norge we hatta siddinkarvo dikinik chaila osto tykka hennakska. + +00:30:52.000 --> 00:30:58.000 +[Subtitle] AND GIRLS WITH MASSIVE KNOCKERS! + +00:30:58.000 --> 00:31:06.000 + +Gikkiaski ungurden kola bijiusti stonosse. + +00:31:06.000 --> 00:31:12.000 +[Subtitle] HONESTLY, THEY'LL DO ANYTHING FOR YOU + +00:31:12.000 --> 00:31:20.000 + +Hijiasgo biunderten ki yikilpa stivvora niski ofidae. + +00:31:20.000 --> 00:31:26.000 +[Subtitle] THEY'LL GO THROUGH THE CARD + +00:31:26.000 --> 00:31:32.000 + +E stavaskija, E stonioska. + +00:31:32.000 --> 00:31:38.000 +[Subtitle] YOU NAME IT, THEY KNOW IT + +00:31:38.000 --> 00:31:48.000 + +Stingik oloshoyert okka in Trondheim khi oyplitz… + +00:31:48.000 --> 00:31:54.000 +[Subtitle] BUT THERE'S ONE IN TRONDHEIM WHO CAN PUT HER… + +00:31:54.000 --> 00:31:58.000 +[Action] Blackout. + +00:31:58.000 --> 00:32:04.000 +[Caption] PARTY POLITICAL BROADCAST ON BEHALF OF THE NORWEGIAN PARTY + +00:32:04.000 --> 00:33:00.000 + +Highlights of that broadcast will be discussed later by Lord George-Brown... Ron and Christine Boslo… + +00:33:00.000 --> 00:33:10.000 +[Animation] Balloons ascending. Montage with music. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_40__The_golden_age_of_ballooning/5_Zeppelin.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_40__The_golden_age_of_ballooning/5_Zeppelin.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..38c82767 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_40__The_golden_age_of_ballooning/5_Zeppelin.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,171 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Skit begins at anchor #5. Timings are placeholders; includes narration, party aboard zeppelin, and cottage cutaways. + +00:33:10.000 --> 00:33:20.000 +[Caption] 'THE GOLDEN AGE OF BALLOONING' / 'EPISODE SIX: FERDINAND VON ZEPPELIN - PIONEER OF THE AIRSHIP' + +00:33:20.000 --> 00:33:28.000 +[Action] Cut to photo of family group. + +00:33:28.000 --> 00:33:44.000 + +Ferdinand von Zeppelin was born in Constance in 1838, the brother of Barry Zeppelin, the least talented of the fourteen Zeppelin brothers. + +00:33:44.000 --> 00:34:00.000 +[Action] B/W film: Barry blows up balloons of increasing size; they sink. Last inflates him; he rises. Cut to stock film of a zeppelin. + +00:34:00.000 --> 00:34:10.000 + +Meanwhile for Ferdinand von Zeppelin, the year 1908 was a year of triumph. + +00:34:10.000 --> 00:34:22.000 +[Action] Interior of zeppelin: party, guests, champagne, orchestra, guests gaze out windows. + +00:34:22.000 --> 00:34:30.000 + +(approaching Zeppelin) Herr Zeppelin - it's wonderful! It's put ballooning right back on the map. + +00:34:30.000 --> 00:34:42.000 + +It's not a balloon! D'you hear?… It's not a balloon … It's an airship … an airship … d'you hear? + +00:34:42.000 --> 00:34:48.000 +[Action] Zeppelin hits Von Bülow hard on top of head with underside of fist. + +00:34:48.000 --> 00:34:54.000 + +Well, it's very nice anyway. + +00:34:54.000 --> 00:35:04.000 + +(to Zeppelin) Tell me, what is the principle of these balloons? + +00:35:04.000 --> 00:35:18.000 + +It's not a balloon! You stupid little thick-headed Saxon git! It's not a balloon! Balloons is for kiddy-winkies. If you want to play with balloons, get outside. + +00:35:18.000 --> 00:35:26.000 +[Action] Zeppelin drags Tirpitz to door and flings him out into the clouds. + +00:35:26.000 --> 00:35:30.000 + +Aaaaaaaaaghhh! + +00:35:30.000 --> 00:35:40.000 +[Action] Cut to old German couple in cottage; man reading big book; lady knitting; lederhosen drying. + +00:35:40.000 --> 00:35:48.000 + +(reading) Yorkshire … pudding. A type of thick pancake, eaten with large … + +00:35:48.000 --> 00:35:58.000 +[SFX] Roof-splitting noise; thump; house shakes. They look up. + +00:35:58.000 --> 00:36:06.000 + +I hear you are to name the balloon after Bismarck? + +00:36:06.000 --> 00:36:18.000 + +(into hysterical rage) Bismarck? Of course I'm not calling it after Bismarck. It's a zeppelin. It's nothing to do with bloody Bismarck! + +00:36:18.000 --> 00:36:26.000 + +Surely he gave you some money for it? + +00:36:26.000 --> 00:36:32.000 + +Get outside! + +00:36:32.000 --> 00:36:40.000 +[Action] Hollweg flung out. Cut back to cottage. + +00:36:40.000 --> 00:36:54.000 + +Za… bag… lione… a sort of cream mouse… mousse of Italian origin… + +00:36:54.000 --> 00:37:16.000 +[SFX] Repeated roof splintering crashes and thumps; house shakes. + +00:37:16.000 --> 00:37:22.000 + +(looking into other room) Oh, look! It's the Chancellor! + +00:37:22.000 --> 00:37:30.000 + +What? Prince Von Bülow? Here? + +00:37:30.000 --> 00:37:38.000 + +Ja! + +00:37:38.000 --> 00:37:44.000 + +Coming here? + +00:37:44.000 --> 00:37:50.000 + +No - he is here. + +00:37:50.000 --> 00:38:00.000 + +(jumping to his feet) Oh, I must go and put my old uniform on. + +00:38:00.000 --> 00:38:08.000 + +He won't notice, Helmut. He's dead. + +00:38:08.000 --> 00:38:16.000 + +Dead? Here? + +00:38:16.000 --> 00:38:22.000 + +Ja. In our sitting room. + +00:38:22.000 --> 00:38:28.000 + +This is our sitting room, dear. + +00:38:28.000 --> 00:38:34.000 + +Well, you know what I mean. + +00:38:34.000 --> 00:38:40.000 + +(waving his finger) The drawing room! + +00:38:40.000 --> 00:38:46.000 + +Yes … but it's a kind of sitting room. + +00:38:46.000 --> 00:38:52.000 + +Well… + +00:38:52.000 --> 00:39:02.000 +[Action] Door opens wider: heap of about ten bodies; dust; hole in ceiling. They identify ministers and sort bodies. + +00:39:02.000 --> 00:39:20.000 + +We could sort them out... put internal affairs by the wall; foreign by the clock. + +00:39:20.000 --> 00:39:30.000 + +And we can sort them out alphabetically? + +00:39:30.000 --> 00:39:38.000 + +Nein, nein - just put the cleanest by the door. + +00:39:38.000 --> 00:40:08.000 +[Action] They hump corpses around; debate clock vs chair placement; identify Education, Colonies, etc. + +00:40:08.000 --> 00:40:28.000 + +Count Ferdinand Von Zeppelin's behaviour on that flight in 1900 had incredible, far-reaching consequences... + +00:40:28.000 --> 00:40:40.000 +[Action] Animation of several men being thrown from airship; sequence of Edwardian photos illustrating narration. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_41__Michael_Ellis/0_Episode41_head_tail.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_41__Michael_Ellis/0_Episode41_head_tail.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..7f6e9fda --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_41__Michael_Ellis/0_Episode41_head_tail.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,13 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Intro titles and end credits from 'Monty Python's Flying Circus: Just the Words - Episode 41' + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:05.000 +[titles] Animated titles. + +00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:08.000 +[caption] 'THE END' + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:15.000 +[credits] Roll credits. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_41__Michael_Ellis/10_Different_endings.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_41__Michael_Ellis/10_Different_endings.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..ad57912e --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_41__Michael_Ellis/10_Different_endings.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,144 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Browsing the End of Show Department and choosing a sudden ending + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:05.000 +[action] Cut to 'End of Show Department' counter. + +00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:06.500 + +Well it is one of our cheapest, sir. + +00:00:06.500 --> 00:00:08.500 + +What else have you got? + +00:00:08.500 --> 00:00:12.000 + +There's the long slow pull-out… camera tracks back and mixes… + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:20.000 +[action] We pull out and mix to exterior of store; then wider aerial view of London; stops abruptly; cut back. + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:21.500 + +No, have you got anything more exciting? + +00:00:21.500 --> 00:00:23.500 + +How about a chase? + +00:00:23.500 --> 00:00:28.000 +[action] Manager and toupee assistants appear: 'There he is!'; exciting chase music; they pursue Chris through store. + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:29.500 + +Oh, no, no, no. + +00:00:29.500 --> 00:00:31.500 + +Walking into the sunset? + +00:00:31.500 --> 00:00:33.000 + +What's that one? + +00:00:33.000 --> 00:00:39.000 +[action] Dramatic beach sunset; backs of Chris and Assistant walking toward sun; music swells; assistant narrates. + +00:00:39.000 --> 00:00:43.000 + +You know … two lone figures silhouetted against the dying rays… music swells… lump in throat… tear in eye… + +00:00:43.000 --> 00:00:44.500 +[action] Cut back to store. + +00:00:44.500 --> 00:00:45.800 + +Oh no. + +00:00:45.800 --> 00:00:47.800 + +Oh, pity, I rather like that one… + +00:00:47.800 --> 00:00:50.000 + +They're all a bit off the point, you see. + +00:00:50.000 --> 00:00:53.000 + +There is one that ties up the whole Michael Ellis thing, but…. + +00:00:53.000 --> 00:00:54.500 + +But what… ? + +00:00:54.500 --> 00:00:56.000 + +Oh, no, nothing, nothing… + +00:00:56.000 --> 00:00:58.500 + +Look, who is this Michael Ellis? + +00:00:58.500 --> 00:01:00.500 + +How about a happy ending, sir? + +00:01:00.500 --> 00:01:04.000 +[action] Girl rushes up and flings arms around Chris. + +00:01:04.000 --> 00:01:05.500 + +Oh Chris! Thank God you're safe. + +00:01:05.500 --> 00:01:07.000 + +No, you wouldn't want that, would you. + +00:01:07.000 --> 00:01:09.000 +[action] Girl disappears. + +00:01:09.000 --> 00:01:11.000 + +Why wouldn't I want that? + +00:01:11.000 --> 00:01:14.000 + +What about summing up from the panel? That's cheap. The big match experts. + +00:01:14.000 --> 00:01:19.000 +[action] Cut to football panel set: Malcolm Allison, Brian Clough, huge still of Jimmy Hill. + +00:01:19.000 --> 00:01:21.500 + +Yes. It was quite a good show. I think that the Michael Ellis character was a little overdone. + +00:01:21.500 --> 00:01:24.000 + +Well, I don't agree with that, Malcolm, quite frankly the only bit I liked was this bit with me in it now. + +00:01:24.000 --> 00:01:25.500 +[action] Cut back to store. + +00:01:25.500 --> 00:01:27.000 + +No? Slow fade? + +00:01:27.000 --> 00:01:29.000 +[action] Picture begins to fade. + +00:01:29.000 --> 00:01:30.500 + +Nnnn… no. + +00:01:30.500 --> 00:01:32.000 +[action] Picture comes up again. + +00:01:32.000 --> 00:01:34.000 + +Well, how about a sudden ending? + +00:01:34.000 --> 00:01:34.500 +[blackout] End. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_41__Michael_Ellis/1_Department_store.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_41__Michael_Ellis/1_Department_store.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..d8651e7d --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_41__Michael_Ellis/1_Department_store.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,54 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Establishing the Harrods-type store and initial antics + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:10.000 +[action] Establishing shot of large Harrods-type store; limousines and taxis disgorge rich customers; small doormen in enormous coats open doors. + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:15.000 +[action] A man with his nose bandaged exits the store. + +00:00:15.000 --> 00:00:25.000 +[action] A large car pulls up; doorman (Michael Palin) opens door; opulent lady (Terry Jones) in furs exits and knees him in the groin, walks into store. + +00:00:25.000 --> 00:00:32.000 +[action] Chris Quinn (Eric Idle) arrives on a bicycle; parks it; doorman flings it into the road; Chris enters outer hall. + +00:00:32.000 --> 00:00:42.000 +[action] Passing couple with bandaged noses; gaggle of customers rush out; pepperpot bangs into glass doors, clutches nose, escorted away. + +00:00:42.000 --> 00:00:55.000 +[caption] Store directory: BASEMENT: DANGEROUS GASES... TENTH FLOOR: FRESH AIR, CLOUDS, OCCASIONAL PERIODS OF SUNSHINE. + +00:00:55.000 --> 00:01:05.000 +[action] Chris proceeds cautiously, enters; background theme of noses banging on glass. + +00:01:05.000 --> 00:01:12.000 +[action] Gift department: Large lady with cylinder and rose attachment. + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:16.000 + +Yes this looks the sort of thing. May I just try it? + +00:01:16.000 --> 00:01:18.500 + +Certainly, madam. + +00:01:18.500 --> 00:01:24.000 +[action] She presses button; sheet of flame shoots across the hall. + +00:01:24.000 --> 00:01:29.000 + +Oh! Sorry! So sorry! [happy] Yes that's fine. + +00:01:29.000 --> 00:01:32.000 + +Is that on account, madam? + +00:01:32.000 --> 00:01:33.500 + +Yes. + +00:01:33.500 --> 00:01:40.000 +[action] Chris walks by, watching; a customer's back is on fire unnoticed; Chris approaches 'Ant Counter', rings bell. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_41__Michael_Ellis/2_Buying_an_ant.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_41__Michael_Ellis/2_Buying_an_ant.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..74d1de4f --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_41__Michael_Ellis/2_Buying_an_ant.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,659 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Chris Quinn attempts to buy an ant at the store + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:03.000 + +Hello? Hello? + +00:00:03.000 --> 00:00:08.000 +[action] Rubber-masked head appears, gesticulates with strange noise, then stops. + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:15.000 + +Oh, I'm terribly sorry… [removes mask] I thought you were someone else. + +00:00:15.000 --> 00:00:16.500 + +Oh I see, yes. + +00:00:16.500 --> 00:00:20.000 + +I'm sorry sir, can I help you? + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:28.000 + +Yes, yes, actually I was interested in the possibility of purchasing one of your… can I ask who you thought I was? + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:29.500 + +What? + +00:00:29.500 --> 00:00:34.000 + +Who did you think I was… just then… when you thought I was somebody. + +00:00:34.000 --> 00:00:37.000 + +Oh, it's no one you'd know, sir. + +00:00:37.000 --> 00:00:39.500 + +Well I might know them. + +00:00:39.500 --> 00:00:43.000 + +It's possible, obviously, but I think it's really unlikely. + +00:00:43.000 --> 00:00:46.000 + +Well, I know quite a lot… + +00:00:46.000 --> 00:00:51.000 + +I mean he's hardly likely to move in your circles, sir… + +00:00:51.000 --> 00:00:53.000 + +Why, is he very rich? + +00:00:53.000 --> 00:00:55.000 + +Oh, no, I didn't mean that, sir. + +00:00:55.000 --> 00:00:57.000 + +Is he a lord or something? + +00:00:57.000 --> 00:00:59.000 + +Oh, no, not at all. + +00:00:59.000 --> 00:01:03.000 + +Well look, this is very easy to settle. What is his name? + +00:01:03.000 --> 00:01:04.500 + +What? + +00:01:04.500 --> 00:01:06.500 + +What is his name? + +00:01:06.500 --> 00:01:09.500 + +Well… er… + +00:01:09.500 --> 00:01:10.500 + +Yes? + +00:01:10.500 --> 00:01:12.500 + +Michael Ellis. + +00:01:12.500 --> 00:01:13.500 + +Who? + +00:01:13.500 --> 00:01:15.500 + +Michael Ellis. + +00:01:15.500 --> 00:01:16.500 + +I see. + +00:01:16.500 --> 00:01:18.500 + +Do you know him, sir? + +00:01:18.500 --> 00:01:21.000 + +Er … Michael Ellis. Michael Ellis… + +00:01:21.000 --> 00:01:22.000 + +You don't. + +00:01:22.000 --> 00:01:24.000 + +Well, I don't remember the name. + +00:01:24.000 --> 00:01:26.500 + +I think you would remember him, sir. + +00:01:26.500 --> 00:01:29.500 + +Why do you say that? + +00:01:29.500 --> 00:01:36.000 + +Well, would you remember a man six foot nine inches high, fortyish, long scar here to here and absolutely no nose? + +00:01:36.000 --> 00:01:38.500 + +… oh, I think I do remember somebody like that… + +00:01:38.500 --> 00:01:40.500 + +Well, that's not Michael Ellis. + +00:01:40.500 --> 00:01:41.500 + +What? + +00:01:41.500 --> 00:01:44.500 + +He's a small man about this high with a high-pitched voice. + +00:01:44.500 --> 00:01:47.500 + +Right, I'm not going to buy an ant from you now. + +00:01:47.500 --> 00:01:49.500 + +[distressed] Oh, no, please. + +00:01:49.500 --> 00:01:53.000 + +No. You've not been properly trained. I demand another assistant. + +00:01:53.000 --> 00:01:55.500 + +Oh, no, come on… please… + +00:01:55.500 --> 00:01:58.000 + +No, I want another assistant. + +00:01:58.000 --> 00:02:01.000 +All right! I'll get another assistant. [disappears behind curtain] + +00:02:01.000 --> 00:02:02.500 + +Thank you. + +00:02:02.500 --> 00:02:06.500 +[action] Same assistant reappears with long Chinese mandarin moustache. + +00:02:06.500 --> 00:02:09.500 + +[high-pitched] Hello sir, can I help you, sir? + +00:02:09.500 --> 00:02:11.500 + +No, I want a different assistant. + +00:02:11.500 --> 00:02:13.500 + +I am sir, I'm Mr Abanazar, sir. + +00:02:13.500 --> 00:02:15.000 + +Don't be silly. + +00:02:15.000 --> 00:02:18.000 + +[normal voice] Oh no, please please please let me help you… + +00:02:18.000 --> 00:02:20.000 + +No! I want another assistant. + +00:02:20.000 --> 00:02:22.500 + +Oh, no, come on, please… + +00:02:22.500 --> 00:02:25.500 + +If you don't give me another assistant… + +00:02:25.500 --> 00:02:31.000 + +No, no, I'll be very good, sir, really. Good morning, sir… how are you, sir… bit parky outside today… isn't it, sir… ? A very nice suit… close shave… + +00:02:31.000 --> 00:02:32.500 + +Right I'm going! + +00:02:32.500 --> 00:02:36.000 +No, no, please… [removes moustache] I'll get another assistant… [rings bell] + +00:02:36.000 --> 00:02:41.000 +[action] Slowly identical mask appears next to him, making quiet noise; First Assistant nudges him. + +00:02:41.000 --> 00:02:43.000 + +Woooooo ….ooooooo… + +00:02:43.000 --> 00:02:44.500 + +It's not him! + +00:02:44.500 --> 00:02:47.000 +[action] Second assistant disappears below. + +00:02:47.000 --> 00:02:49.000 + +[points] I don't want him! + +00:02:49.000 --> 00:02:50.500 + +Oh please, give him a chance! + +00:02:50.500 --> 00:02:51.500 + +No! + +00:02:51.500 --> 00:02:55.000 + +[appears immaculate] Yes, sir, can I be of any assistance? + +00:02:55.000 --> 00:02:57.000 + +Oh no, come on, don't try that! + +00:02:57.000 --> 00:02:59.500 + +I'm sorry, sir… try what? + +00:02:59.500 --> 00:03:02.000 + +You know perfectly well what I mean. + +00:03:02.000 --> 00:03:04.000 + +I'm afraid I don't, sir. + +00:03:04.000 --> 00:03:06.000 + +You were down behind there with a silly mask on going wooo-ooo… + +00:03:06.000 --> 00:03:07.500 + +I don't think I was, sir. + +00:03:07.500 --> 00:03:09.500 + +All right, get the manager. + +00:03:09.500 --> 00:03:12.000 + +There seems to have been some sort of misunderstanding, sir. + +00:03:12.000 --> 00:03:13.000 + +Manager! + +00:03:13.000 --> 00:03:14.500 + +This is the manager, sir. + +00:03:14.500 --> 00:03:15.500 + +What? + +00:03:15.500 --> 00:03:17.500 + +[silly voice] Yes, I'm the manager. + +00:03:17.500 --> 00:03:19.500 + +Manager! [keeps calling] + +00:03:19.500 --> 00:03:25.000 + +It's a smashing store… well-lit, rat-free… freshest haddock in London (2nd floor), 3rd floor Ribena, ants here, TV and flamethrowers there… dinner-wagon exhibition closes at six… + +00:03:25.000 --> 00:03:26.000 +[nudges] Quick! + +00:03:26.000 --> 00:03:29.000 +[action] Both disappear under counter; real manager arrives. + +00:03:29.000 --> 00:03:31.500 + +Yes, sir? Can I help you, sir? + +00:03:31.500 --> 00:03:34.000 + +[notices badge] Yes, I want to complain about the assistants on this counter. + +00:03:34.000 --> 00:03:35.500 + +I'm sorry to hear that, sir, which ones? + +00:03:35.500 --> 00:03:37.500 + +Well, they're hiding now. + +00:03:37.500 --> 00:03:39.000 + +Sir? + +00:03:39.000 --> 00:03:42.000 + +They're hiding, down there behind the counter. + +00:03:42.000 --> 00:03:46.000 +[action] Manager searches behind counter; Chris joins; ‘well… nobody down here, sir.’ + +00:03:46.000 --> 00:03:49.000 + +They must have crawled through here, and made their escape through 'Soft Toys'. + +00:03:49.000 --> 00:03:50.500 + +Yes, of course. + +00:03:50.500 --> 00:03:55.000 + +They were wearing masks and making silly noises and one of them pretended to be the manager. He spoke like this.. [impression] + +00:03:55.000 --> 00:03:58.000 + +Ah! I think I've got it, sir! It's rag week. + +00:03:58.000 --> 00:03:59.500 + +Ragweek? + +00:03:59.500 --> 00:04:02.000 + +Yes, you know, for charity, sir. + +00:04:02.000 --> 00:04:04.000 + +Oh! I see. Some local college or university? + +00:04:04.000 --> 00:04:06.000 + +No, no it's the store's rag week. + +00:04:06.000 --> 00:04:08.000 + +The store's rag week? + +00:04:08.000 --> 00:04:11.000 + +Yes. Senior staff don't join in much—it's for the trainees really… + +00:04:11.000 --> 00:04:13.000 + +It's not very good for business is it? + +00:04:13.000 --> 00:04:16.000 +Oh, it's for charity, sir. People are awfully good about it. [rattles tin] + +00:04:16.000 --> 00:04:17.500 +Yes, yes, of course. [puts coin in] + +00:04:17.500 --> 00:04:20.000 + +Right, sir, I'll get you a senior assistant—ants, was it? + +00:04:20.000 --> 00:04:21.500 + +Yes, please. + +00:04:21.500 --> 00:04:26.000 +[calls] Mr Snetterton? [crew-cut wig appears—it's First Assistant] Could you look after this gentleman? + +00:04:26.000 --> 00:04:27.500 + +I don't want him! + +00:04:27.500 --> 00:04:29.500 + +Oh please! Give me a chance! + +00:04:29.500 --> 00:04:31.000 + +No! + +00:04:31.000 --> 00:04:33.000 + +All right - Mr Hartford! + +00:04:33.000 --> 00:04:35.500 + +Yes - good morning, sir - can I help you? + +00:04:35.500 --> 00:04:38.000 + +Yes, please, I'm interested in buying an ant. + +00:04:38.000 --> 00:04:41.500 + +Ah yes - and what price were you thinking of paying, sir? + +00:04:41.500 --> 00:04:44.000 + +Oh, well, I hadn't actually got as far as that. + +00:04:44.000 --> 00:04:49.500 + +They start about half a p., can go as high as three p. or three and a half p. for a champion—inflation I'm afraid… + +00:04:49.500 --> 00:04:51.500 + +I should think one about one and a half p., please. + +00:04:51.500 --> 00:04:55.500 + +You should get a very serviceable little animal for that, sir. Half-pence ones are a bit mangy… What length was sir thinking of? + +00:04:55.500 --> 00:04:57.000 + +Oh … medium? + +00:04:57.000 --> 00:05:03.000 +Medium. Here we are, sir. [tips invisible ants into ring] That one is an Ayrshire, that a King George bitch, and that one killing the little flitbat is an Afghan. + +00:05:03.000 --> 00:05:04.500 + +That's a nice one. + +00:05:04.500 --> 00:05:07.500 +Let's see how you get on with him, eh? [places on Chris's hand] Ah yes, he likes you. + +00:05:07.500 --> 00:05:09.500 + +What do you feed them on? + +00:05:09.500 --> 00:05:10.500 + +Blancmange. + +00:05:10.500 --> 00:05:12.000 + +Blancmange? + +00:05:12.000 --> 00:05:15.000 + +I'm sorry. I don't know why I said that. No, you don't feed them at all. + +00:05:15.000 --> 00:05:16.500 + +Well, what do they live on? + +00:05:16.500 --> 00:05:18.000 + +They don't. They die. + +00:05:18.000 --> 00:05:19.500 + +They die? + +00:05:19.500 --> 00:05:22.000 + +Well of course they do, if you don't feed them. + +00:05:22.000 --> 00:05:24.000 + +I don't understand. + +00:05:24.000 --> 00:05:28.000 + +You let them die, then you buy another one. Cheaper than feeding; constant variety of companions. + +00:05:28.000 --> 00:05:29.500 + +Oh, I see. + +00:05:29.500 --> 00:05:31.500 + +That's the advantage of owning an ant. + +00:05:31.500 --> 00:05:34.500 + +Right, well I'll take this one. Oh dear, I've dropped it… + +00:05:34.500 --> 00:05:36.500 + +Never mind. Here's another one. + +00:05:36.500 --> 00:05:38.500 + +Is there anything else I'll need? + +00:05:38.500 --> 00:05:42.000 +Yes, sir - you'll need an ant house. [produces birdcage] This is the model we recommend. + +00:05:42.000 --> 00:05:43.500 + +Won't it get out of there? + +00:05:43.500 --> 00:05:44.500 + +Yes. + +00:05:44.500 --> 00:05:46.500 + +Well what's the point of having the cage? + +00:05:46.500 --> 00:05:52.000 + +None at all really. And then cage furniture: ant-wheel, ant-swing, little ladder to ring bell—nice trick he can learn. + +00:05:52.000 --> 00:05:53.500 + +Will he live long enough? + +00:05:53.500 --> 00:05:57.000 + +Not really, no, but best to have one just in case; and a two-way radio… and of course the book. + +00:05:57.000 --> 00:05:59.500 +[produces expensive book; slams it on ants; brushes them away hurriedly] + +00:05:59.500 --> 00:06:01.000 + +The book? + +00:06:01.000 --> 00:06:02.500 + +Yes, the book on ants. + +00:06:02.500 --> 00:06:04.000 + +[unsure] Yes… + +00:06:04.000 --> 00:06:07.500 + +So, sir, that is, if I may say so, one hundred and eighty-four pounds one and a half p., sir. + +00:06:07.500 --> 00:06:09.500 + +Will you take a cheque? + +00:06:09.500 --> 00:06:15.000 +Yes, sir, if you leave a blood-sample, and a piece of scalp skin just here… sorry… it's just for identification. [hands knife and cotton wool] + +00:06:15.000 --> 00:06:16.500 + +Oh, well I think I'll put it on account. + +00:06:16.500 --> 00:06:22.000 + +I should, sir… much less painful. You know what they say about an ant: a friend for life—well, for its life anyway… + +00:06:22.000 --> 00:06:26.000 +[loads cage, furniture, radio, book into huge box; finds the ant; picks carefully] His name is Marcus. [drops into box labeled 'live ant'] + +00:06:26.000 --> 00:06:30.000 + +If the little chap should go to an early grave, sir, give us a ring and we'll stick a few in an envelope. + +00:06:30.000 --> 00:06:31.500 + +Thanks very much indeed. + +00:06:31.500 --> 00:06:33.000 + +Not at all, thank you, Mr Ellis. + +00:06:33.000 --> 00:06:36.000 +[action] Chris turns sharply. First Assistant approaches Hartford. + +00:06:36.000 --> 00:06:37.500 + +Sssssshh! + +00:06:37.500 --> 00:06:39.000 + +What did you say? + +00:06:39.000 --> 00:06:40.500 + +I said thank you, Mr Ellis… + +00:06:40.500 --> 00:06:41.500 + +It's not him. + +00:06:41.500 --> 00:06:42.500 + +Oh! + +00:06:42.500 --> 00:06:44.500 + +Why did you say I was Mr Ellis? + +00:06:44.500 --> 00:06:46.000 + +[innocently] Who? + +00:06:46.000 --> 00:06:47.500 + +No, he didn't say that. + +00:06:47.500 --> 00:06:50.500 + +Yes he did. I heard him say 'Thank you, Mr Ellis'. + +00:06:50.500 --> 00:06:52.500 + +Oh, no, no - he said 'I'm jealous'. + +00:06:52.500 --> 00:06:53.500 + +What? + +00:06:53.500 --> 00:06:56.000 +I'm jealous of your ant. Goodbye. Goodbye. [waves] + +00:06:56.000 --> 00:06:58.000 + +[leaving counter] I don't care who Michael Ellis is! + +00:06:58.000 --> 00:07:04.000 +[action] Chris passes 'Paisley Counter' with Irish-accented mirror talk; smouldering trolley old lady; approaches lift. + +00:07:04.000 --> 00:07:10.000 + +Will Mr Michael Ellis please go straight to the manager's office… I'll repeat that… Will Mr Nigel Mellish please go straight to the manager's office. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_41__Michael_Ellis/3_At_home_with_the_ant_and_other_pets.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_41__Michael_Ellis/3_At_home_with_the_ant_and_other_pets.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..adc18a53 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_41__Michael_Ellis/3_At_home_with_the_ant_and_other_pets.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,130 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Chris Quinn brings Marcus home among many exotic pets + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:08.000 +[action] Chris cautiously enters lift; cut to kitchen at home: mother preparing bowls for Babboon, Dromedary, Gorilla, Trout, Pangolin; tiger in cage; cobra on clothes drier; wolf under sink; monkey on cupboard; Chris enters with box. + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:10.000 + +What have you got now? + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:12.000 + +I bought an ant, mother. + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:20.000 + +What d'you want one of them for! I'm not going to clean it out. You said you'd clean the tiger out, but do you? No… now it'll be ant ant ant… then 'oh, mum, I've bought a sloth' or other odd-toed ungulate like a tapir. + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:23.000 + +It's really different this time, mum. I'm really going to look after this ant. + +00:00:23.000 --> 00:00:27.000 + +That's what you said about the sperm whale… now your papa's having to use it as a garage. + +00:00:27.000 --> 00:00:29.000 + +Well, you didn't feed it properly. + +00:00:29.000 --> 00:00:35.000 + +Where are we going to get forty-four tons of plankton every morning? Your papa was dead vexed. They thought he was mad in the deli. + +00:00:35.000 --> 00:00:37.500 + +Well at least he's got a free garage. + +00:00:37.500 --> 00:00:40.000 +[sound] Tiger growls. + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:45.000 + +That's no good to him… his Hillman smells all fishy. [roar] Oh blimey, that's the tiger. He'll want his mandies. + +00:00:45.000 --> 00:00:47.000 + +Are you giving that tiger drugs? + +00:00:47.000 --> 00:00:49.000 + +Course I'm giving it drugs! + +00:00:49.000 --> 00:00:50.500 + +It's illegal. + +00:00:50.500 --> 00:00:52.500 + +You try telling that to the tiger. + +00:00:52.500 --> 00:00:54.500 + +I think it's dangerous. + +00:00:54.500 --> 00:01:00.000 + +Before he started fixing, he got through four Jehovah's witnesses a day. Ate all of them, except the pamphlets. + +00:01:00.000 --> 00:01:01.500 + +Well he's not dim. + +00:01:01.500 --> 00:01:04.000 +[sound] Very loud roar; cage rattles. + +00:01:04.000 --> 00:01:05.500 + +All right! + +00:01:05.500 --> 00:01:08.000 +[action] She loads a syringe and starts to leave. + +00:01:08.000 --> 00:01:11.000 + +Well, I'm going to watch one of the televisions… come on Marcus. + +00:01:11.000 --> 00:01:15.000 +[action] Puts Marcus in cage; about to take it to sitting room. + +00:01:15.000 --> 00:01:17.000 + +Michael's been on the phone all day for you. + +00:01:17.000 --> 00:01:18.500 + +Michael? + +00:01:18.500 --> 00:01:23.000 + +You know, Michael… Michael. Michael Ellis. He's been on the phone all day … he came round twice. + +00:01:23.000 --> 00:01:24.500 + +What did he look like? + +00:01:24.500 --> 00:01:28.500 + +Oh, I didn't see him. The orange-rumped agouti answered the door. Only useful animal you ever bought, that. + +00:01:28.500 --> 00:01:30.000 + +Where is he now? + +00:01:30.000 --> 00:01:33.000 + +He's upstairs forging prescriptions for the sodding tiger! + +00:01:33.000 --> 00:01:35.000 + +No, no, where is Michael Ellis now? + +00:01:35.000 --> 00:01:39.000 + +Oh, I don't know… he said it wasn't important, anyway… all right, here I come. + +00:01:39.000 --> 00:01:45.000 +[action] She goes to tiger. Chris looks confused, shrugs, goes to sitting room with Marcus; twenty old TVs on shelves; selects one, switches on to watch with Marcus. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_41__Michael_Ellis/4_Documentary_on_ants.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_41__Michael_Ellis/4_Documentary_on_ants.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..33988197 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_41__Michael_Ellis/4_Documentary_on_ants.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,63 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE University of the Air segments and ant communications restaurant sketch + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:05.000 +[caption on TV] 'UNIVERSITY OF THE AIR' + +00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:12.000 + +[on TV] Hello and welcome to the University of the Air… part seventeen… intraspecific signalling codes in the family formicidea. + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:14.500 + +That's a stroke of luck, Marcus… + +00:00:14.500 --> 00:00:28.000 +[action] Cut to restaurant; waiter and hero exchange ant signalling routines (stamps, movements). + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:31.000 +[caption] 'MAY I HAVE YOUR COAT' + +00:00:31.000 --> 00:00:34.000 +[action] Hero stamps; clasps waiter's bottom. + +00:00:34.000 --> 00:00:37.000 +[caption] 'I DON'T HAVE A COAT. I AM AN ANT' + +00:00:37.000 --> 00:00:40.000 +[action] Waiter routine. + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:42.500 +[caption] 'AREN'T WE ALL?' + +00:00:42.500 --> 00:00:44.500 +[action] Hero routine. + +00:00:44.500 --> 00:00:47.500 +[caption] 'WHERE'S BRUNO?' + +00:00:47.500 --> 00:00:49.500 +[action] Waiter routine. + +00:00:49.500 --> 00:00:52.000 +[caption] 'HE GOT TRODDEN ON' + +00:00:52.000 --> 00:00:54.000 +[action] Hero routine. + +00:00:54.000 --> 00:00:57.000 +[caption] 'WHAT'S THE SPECIAL TODAY?' + +00:00:57.000 --> 00:00:59.000 +[action] Waiter routine. + +00:00:59.000 --> 00:01:01.500 +[caption] 'FILLET OF ANTEATER' + +00:01:01.500 --> 00:01:03.000 +[action] Hero routine. + +00:01:03.000 --> 00:01:05.500 +[caption] 'THAT'LL LEARN IT' + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_41__Michael_Ellis/5_Ant_communication.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_41__Michael_Ellis/5_Ant_communication.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..ae5f8b8d --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_41__Michael_Ellis/5_Ant_communication.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,91 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE TV interruptions, ant anatomy and discovery Marcus is missing legs + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:05.000 +[action] Mother enters, torn and bloodstained. + +00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:07.000 + +Turn that bloody thing off! + +00:00:07.000 --> 00:00:12.000 + +We interrupt this programme with latest news of the extraordinary Michael Ellis saga. Apparently Michael Ellis… + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:14.000 +[action] Mother switches TV off. + +00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:15.500 + +Hey! I was watching that… + +00:00:15.500 --> 00:00:20.000 + +Bloody thing. It's upsetting the tiger. [roar and crockery crash] Oh Christ! + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:22.000 +[action] Mother dashes to kitchen; Chris quickly switches TV on. + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:26.000 + +[waits for noises to stop] …nd of the announcement. Back to 'University of the Air'… 'Elements of Surgical Homeopathic Practice'. Part 68 - 'Ants'. + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:27.500 + +Ah! We're in luck again, Marcus. + +00:00:27.500 --> 00:00:31.000 +[action] Surgeon appears on TV; makes ant gestures. + +00:00:31.000 --> 00:00:34.000 + +Hello formicidophiles! Before the blood and guts, let's look at the anatomy of the little ant. + +00:00:34.000 --> 00:00:40.000 +[action] Cut to drawing of an ant. + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:50.000 + +The body of the ant is divided into head, thorax and abdomen. Enclosed in exoskeleton… but not protected from dissector's scalpel. [animated hand slices bits] + +00:00:50.000 --> 00:00:56.000 + +And his legs… carry hundreds of times his weight, but look—[hand pulls legs off] four, five, six … Ha! + +00:00:56.000 --> 00:00:58.500 + +I didn't know ants had six legs, Marcus! + +00:00:58.500 --> 00:01:00.500 + +Well I can assure you they do, Mr Ellis. + +00:01:00.500 --> 00:01:05.500 + +Hey! You've got two legs missing! And that's a false feeler Marcus! Blimey! + +00:01:05.500 --> 00:01:10.000 +[action] Chris leaps up, switches TV off, hurls it into corner onto pile of TVs, hurries out. + +00:01:10.000 --> 00:01:15.000 +[action] Tiger quiet; Mother, bloody and torn, empties 'Kit-E-Cobra' into box marked 'Cobra'. + +00:01:15.000 --> 00:01:17.500 + +I'm taking this ant back, mother - he's got two legs missing. + +00:01:17.500 --> 00:01:20.500 + +Hey! Mrs McWong's been on the phone! The polar bear's been in her garden again. + +00:01:20.500 --> 00:01:22.500 + +Well I'll get it on the way back from the store. + +00:01:22.500 --> 00:01:27.000 +Well mind you do - his droppings are enormous. Oh, and while you're out get us another couple of tellies—here's 180 quid. [tosses wad] + +00:01:27.000 --> 00:01:32.000 +[action] Garden outside: TVs heaped on path; TV van unloading more onto trolley; Chris catches wad, leaves through garden gate. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_41__Michael_Ellis/6_Complaining_about_ant.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_41__Michael_Ellis/6_Complaining_about_ant.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..25bf66d5 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_41__Michael_Ellis/6_Complaining_about_ant.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,82 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Lift scene and misdirections to Toupee Hall + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Back to store, inside lift; Chris with ant; two German-costumed ladies; lift woman with multiple ailments recites floors. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:10.000 + +Second floor … stationery, leather goods, tribal head injuries, cricket bats, film stars, dolphinariums. + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:14.000 +[action] Lift stops; German girls get out; Greek man with oar gets in. + +00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:18.000 + +Third floor … cosmetics, books, Irish massage, tribal head-gear, ants… [Chris starts to get out] but not complaints about ants! + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:19.500 + +Oh, where do I go to complain? + +00:00:19.500 --> 00:00:26.000 + +Straight on, then left, then right past the thing, up the little stairs, right by where it's gone all soft, down the wobbly bit, left past the nail, past the brown stain to your right and it's the door marked exit straight ahead on the left. + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:27.000 + +Thank you. + +00:00:27.000 --> 00:00:30.000 +[doors shut, VO] Fourth floor… kiddies' vasectomies… + +00:00:30.000 --> 00:00:36.000 +[action] Ant counter now signed 'Complaints'; First Assistant with lip plate and enormous false chin. + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:37.500 + +I don't want you. + +00:00:37.500 --> 00:00:41.000 + +[speaking with difficulty] Oh, something wrong with your little ant friend? + +00:00:41.000 --> 00:00:42.500 + +No! I'm not going to tell you. + +00:00:42.500 --> 00:00:44.500 + +Something missing in the leg department? + +00:00:44.500 --> 00:00:47.000 +[action] Manager appears (half in a sack). + +00:00:47.000 --> 00:00:48.500 + +Can I help you, sir? + +00:00:48.500 --> 00:00:50.000 + +No! No! No! No! + +00:00:50.000 --> 00:00:52.000 + +Oh, it's all right, sir, it's for the sack race later on. + +00:00:52.000 --> 00:00:55.000 + +No, no, no, I want to speak to the General Manager, I want to complain. + +00:00:55.000 --> 00:00:57.000 + +Oh, well you want the Toupee Hall in that case, sir. + +00:00:57.000 --> 00:00:58.500 + +The what? + +00:00:58.500 --> 00:01:01.000 +The Toupee Hall, Mr Ellis. [hops off] + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_41__Michael_Ellis/7_Poetry_reading_(ants).vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_41__Michael_Ellis/7_Poetry_reading_(ants).vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..26bacc24 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_41__Michael_Ellis/7_Poetry_reading_(ants).vtt @@ -0,0 +1,100 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Chris ducks into Victorian poetry reading hall to avoid toupee embarrassment + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Chris asks stocking assistant for Toupee Hall directions; public embarrassment ensues; people form ring, peer at his head; he dives into 'Victorian poetry reading hall'. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:10.000 + +Good afternoon, ladies and gentlemen… welcoming our guest speakers: Mr Wadsworth… + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:11.500 + +Wordsworth! + +00:00:11.500 --> 00:00:15.000 + +Sorry, Wordsworth… Mr John Koots, and Percy Bysshe. + +00:00:15.000 --> 00:00:16.500 + +Shelley! + +00:00:16.500 --> 00:00:20.500 +Just a little one, medium dry, [dwarf pours sherry] and Alfred Lorde. + +00:00:20.500 --> 00:00:21.500 + +Tennyson. + +00:00:21.500 --> 00:00:22.500 + +Tennis ball. + +00:00:22.500 --> 00:00:23.500 + +Son, son. + +00:00:23.500 --> 00:00:29.000 + +Sorry - Alfred Lord, evidently Lord Tennisball's son. Now, Mr Wadsworth to recite 'I wandered lonely as a crab'—it's all about ants. + +00:00:29.000 --> 00:00:35.000 + +I wandered lonely as a cloud / That floats on high over vales and hills / When all at once I saw a crowd / A host of golden worker ants. + +00:00:35.000 --> 00:00:37.000 +[crowd] Ripples of applause. + +00:00:37.000 --> 00:00:40.000 + +Thank you, thank you, Mr Bradlaugh. Now, Mr Bysshe. + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:41.500 + +Shelley. + +00:00:41.500 --> 00:00:46.000 +Oh… [dwarf refills glass] … is going to read 'Ode to a crab'. + +00:00:46.000 --> 00:00:58.000 + +[rises quietly] Well, it's not about crabs actually, it's called 'Ozymandias'. It's not an ode. I met a traveller in an antique land / Who said 'Six vast and trunkless legs of stone / Stand in the desert / And on the pedestal these words appear / My name is Ozymandias, King of Ants / Look on my feelers, termites, and despair / I am the biggest ant you'll ever see / The ants of old weren't half as bold and big / And fierce as me'. + +00:00:58.000 --> 00:01:01.000 +[crowd] Enormous applause. + +00:01:01.000 --> 00:01:09.000 +Thank you Mr Amontillado. Please don't soil the carpet—restroom upstairs if poems too exciting. [falls over] Good afternoon, next, Mr Dennis Keat will recite 'Ode to a glass of sherry'. [falls off podium] + +00:01:09.000 --> 00:01:23.000 + +My heart aches and a drowsy numbness pains / My senses, as though an anteater I'd seen / [panic spreads] A nasty long-nosed brute / [screams] With furry legs and sticky darting tongue / I seem to feel its cruel jaws / Crunch crunch there go my legs / Snap snap my thorax too / [women faint] My head's in a twain, there goes my brain / Swallow, swallow, swallow, slurp + +00:01:23.000 --> 00:01:25.000 + +Mr Keats, Mr Keats, please leave immediately. + +00:01:25.000 --> 00:01:27.000 + +It's true. Don't you see. It's true. It happens. + +00:01:27.000 --> 00:01:36.000 + +[bustles him out] Ladies and gentlemen, I do apologize… hesitate to call it a pram… had no idea… and talking of filth… carpet! Now before tea and pramwiches, Arthur Lord Tenniscourt: 'The Charge of the Ant Brigade'. + +00:01:36.000 --> 00:01:38.000 + +Half an inch, half an inch… + +00:01:38.000 --> 00:01:44.000 +[action] Enter Queen Victoria with fanfare, followed by Albert's coffin. All bow and scrape. + +00:01:44.000 --> 00:02:05.000 + +My loyal subjects, we are here today on a matter of national import… disturbed by recent developments in literary style… tendency for the ant to become the dominant… Theme? … of modern poetry… We are not entertained. From now on, ants is verboten. Instead skylarks, daffodils, nightingales, light brigades and… [German aside about stink] Well, we must away now or we shall be late for the races. God bless you alles. + +00:02:05.000 --> 00:02:08.000 +[action] Chris leaves; cut to door labeled 'Electric Kettles'. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_41__Michael_Ellis/8_Toupee.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_41__Michael_Ellis/8_Toupee.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..6ed93797 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_41__Michael_Ellis/8_Toupee.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,197 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Chris enters Toupee Hall; confrontation with toupee fitters + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:03.500 + +Psst! Electric kettles over here, Sir. + +00:00:03.500 --> 00:00:09.000 +[action] Hand with sign 'Toupees' beckons; ushered through; walls with famous bald figures with toupees. + +00:00:09.000 --> 00:00:18.000 + +Don't worry, sir, you're among friends now, sir. Mr Bradford, Mr Crawley. [both have appalling toupees] We pride ourselves on discreet service. I don't know whether you'll believe this, but one of us is actually wearing a toupee at this moment… + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:20.000 + +Well, you all are, aren't you? + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:24.000 +[action] They rush to a mirror. + +00:00:24.000 --> 00:00:25.500 + +Have you got one? + +00:00:25.500 --> 00:00:27.000 + +Yes, but I didn't know… + +00:00:27.000 --> 00:00:29.000 + +I didn't realize that you two… I thought it was me, + +00:00:29.000 --> 00:00:31.000 + +Yes, I thought it was me. + +00:00:31.000 --> 00:00:33.000 + +So did I. [to Crawley] That is good. + +00:00:33.000 --> 00:00:35.000 + +Actually, I only came in here to ask where the manager's office was. + +00:00:35.000 --> 00:00:37.000 + +Just a minute - someone told you we all had toupees? + +00:00:37.000 --> 00:00:38.000 + +No. + +00:00:38.000 --> 00:00:39.000 + +Oh yeah? + +00:00:39.000 --> 00:00:40.500 + +How did you know? + +00:00:40.500 --> 00:00:43.000 + +Well … it's pretty obvious, isn't it? + +00:00:43.000 --> 00:00:44.500 + +What do you mean obvious! His is undetectable. + +00:00:44.500 --> 00:00:46.000 + +Well, it's a different colour, for a start. + +00:00:46.000 --> 00:00:47.000 + +Is it? + +00:00:47.000 --> 00:00:48.000 + +Course it isn't! + +00:00:48.000 --> 00:00:51.000 + +And it doesn't fit in with the rest of his hair… it sort of sticks up in the middle. + +00:00:51.000 --> 00:00:52.000 + +It's better than yours. + +00:00:52.000 --> 00:00:52.800 + +Yes. + +00:00:52.800 --> 00:00:55.000 +I'm not wearing one. [they jeer] + +00:00:55.000 --> 00:00:56.500 + +Oh, I see, you haven't got one. + +00:00:56.500 --> 00:00:58.500 + +Why did you come in here then? + +00:00:58.500 --> 00:01:00.000 + +They told me to find the manager's office here. + +00:01:00.000 --> 00:01:02.500 +[crowd] They jeer again. + +00:01:02.500 --> 00:01:03.800 + +Oh no, not again. + +00:01:03.800 --> 00:01:06.000 + +That's a bit lame, isn't it… + +00:01:06.000 --> 00:01:07.500 + +It's the truth! + +00:01:07.500 --> 00:01:10.000 +Manager's office. [laugh mockingly] + +00:01:10.000 --> 00:01:12.000 + +Yeah, look at it. Where did you get that, Mac Fisheries? + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:13.500 + +Dreadful, isn't it? + +00:01:13.500 --> 00:01:14.500 + +Nylon? + +00:01:14.500 --> 00:01:16.500 +It's not, it's real look. [pulls hair] + +00:01:16.500 --> 00:01:18.000 + +Oh yeah, anyone can do that. + +00:01:18.000 --> 00:01:20.000 +[action] They all pull; Bradford loosens his toupee. + +00:01:20.000 --> 00:01:21.500 + +Come on, get it off. + +00:01:21.500 --> 00:01:22.800 + +Get away. + +00:01:22.800 --> 00:01:24.500 + +Look, do you want a proper one? + +00:01:24.500 --> 00:01:26.000 + +No, I don't need one. + +00:01:26.000 --> 00:01:27.500 + +There's no need to be ashamed. + +00:01:27.500 --> 00:01:29.000 + +We've all owned up. + +00:01:29.000 --> 00:01:30.500 + +I'm not wearing one. + +00:01:30.500 --> 00:01:33.500 + +[beat] Don't you see… this is something you've got to come to terms with. + +00:01:33.500 --> 00:01:36.000 + +I am not wearing a toupee! They told me to come here to find the manager's office, to complain about my ant! + +00:01:36.000 --> 00:01:38.000 + +[look at each other] Pathetic, isn't it. + +00:01:38.000 --> 00:01:39.500 + +Complain about an ant? + +00:01:39.500 --> 00:01:40.800 + +This is for your own good. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_41__Michael_Ellis/9_Complaints_office.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_41__Michael_Ellis/9_Complaints_office.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..33bfd3b0 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_41__Michael_Ellis/9_Complaints_office.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,115 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Chris reaches the manager’s complaints office and hears the store PA announcement + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:05.000 +[action] Toupee fight; all assistants' toupees dislodged; Chris ducks through 'Strictly no admittance' door. + +00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:08.000 +[action] Inside: Manager's office; long line of complainants; desk corner blackened and smoking. + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:09.500 + +[irritably] All right. Take a seat. + +00:00:09.500 --> 00:00:20.000 +[action] Chris sits at end of line; various eccentric complainants detailed (German props, Icelandic honey week, Greek with tyre, lawn mower cat, bandaged noses, smouldering pram, tennis racket head, exploded cigar, terrible suit, attendant molesting well-dressed lady). + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:23.000 + +You see! There ought to be a safety catch on it, I mean … ohhhh! + +00:00:23.000 --> 00:00:26.000 +[action] Spurt of flame shoots out. + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:29.000 + +Yes, madam. I'll speak to the makers personally, all right? + +00:00:29.000 --> 00:00:31.000 + +Would you? It would put my mind at ease. + +00:00:31.000 --> 00:00:33.000 +[action] She leaves; door closes; we hear flamethrower outside. + +00:00:33.000 --> 00:00:34.000 + +Sorry… + +00:00:34.000 --> 00:00:35.500 + +Next? + +00:00:35.500 --> 00:00:38.000 +[action] Colonel Ewing rises; Mr Zyndersky indicates attendant molesting his wife. + +00:00:38.000 --> 00:00:39.500 + +He's still molesting her. + +00:00:39.500 --> 00:00:42.000 + +Yes, yes, I'll see to you in a moment, sir. + +00:00:42.000 --> 00:00:44.500 + +I've got a complaint to make. + +00:00:44.500 --> 00:00:46.500 + +Do take a seat. I'm sorry it's on fire. + +00:00:46.500 --> 00:00:49.000 +Oh, not at all. [sits] I got used to this out east. + +00:00:49.000 --> 00:00:50.500 + +Where were you out east? + +00:00:50.500 --> 00:00:55.000 + +Oh, Norway … Sweden … places like that… oh I'm terribly sorry, my suit seems to keep catching fire. + +00:00:55.000 --> 00:00:56.500 + +Extinguisher? + +00:00:56.500 --> 00:01:00.000 +Oh no, thank you, better let it run its course. Norway is not very east, is it? I should have said out north. [slaps flames] + +00:01:00.000 --> 00:01:01.500 + +Are there many fires in Norway? + +00:01:01.500 --> 00:01:05.000 + +Good Lord yes. Constant blaze. Wooden buildings. I lost my wife in Norway. + +00:01:05.000 --> 00:01:06.500 + +I am sorry to hear that. + +00:01:06.500 --> 00:01:08.000 + +Why, did you know her? + +00:01:08.000 --> 00:01:09.500 + +No, I meant… + +00:01:09.500 --> 00:01:16.000 + +Oh I see. No, she wasn't a favourite of mine. We were strolling across a fiord when a local matador threw scimitars and guillotines from his tree house wine cellar—rather a lot landed on my wife; she snuffed it. + +00:01:16.000 --> 00:01:18.000 + +Yes, yes - well look… + +00:01:18.000 --> 00:01:23.000 +[store PA] Important announcement about Michael Ellis. It is now the end of 'Michael Ellis' week. From now on it is 'Chris Quinn' week. + +00:01:23.000 --> 00:01:24.500 + +What a rotten ending. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_42__Light_entertainment_war/0_Episode42_head_tail.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_42__Light_entertainment_war/0_Episode42_head_tail.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..cd2e56ff --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_42__Light_entertainment_war/0_Episode42_head_tail.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,64 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Intro narration, opening titles, interstitial trailer, and end credits. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[caption] Episode Forty-two: Light entertainment war + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:30.000 +[action] High street. Banjo music like 'Steptoe and Son'. Two tramps walk jauntily, nodding and mock-bowing to passers-by. + +00:00:30.000 --> 00:00:45.000 +[caption] TITLE: 'UP YOUR PAVEMENT' | 'BY THE REV. AND MRS A. G. PHIPPS' | 'FROM AN IDEA BY LORD CARRINGTON' + +00:00:45.000 --> 00:01:12.000 +[action] Tramps root in a litter bin: newspaper, pork pie, bottle of champagne, two polished glasses. They set off together. + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:02:24.000 + +Taking life as it comes, sharing the good things and the bad things, finding laughter and fun wherever they go - it is with these two happy-go-lucky rogues that our story begins. [action] Tramps walk out of shot; sports car up on the pavement with their legs underneath; music turns urgent and transatlantic. For it is they who were run over by Alex Diamond… [action] James Bond-like character climbs out, looks down at dead tramps] …international crime fighter… [action] rushes into a film premiere past photographers] …and playboy… [action] on a yacht] …fast-moving… tough-talking… [action] still of him with Henry Kissinger; striding down a street] …and just one of the many hundreds of famous people who suffer from lumbago, the epidemic disease about which no one knows more than this man… [action] enters doorway; low angle close-up of Dr Koning donning gloves; Kildare theme] Dr Emile Koning… doctor… surgeon… proctologist… and selfless fighter against human suffering, whose doorbell [action] doorbell and pan down] was the one above the hero of our story tonight… [action] pan to nameplate] Rear-Admiral Humphrey De Vere! [action] Rear-admiral strides out; naval music; walks up road] Yes! This is the story of Rear-Admiral Humphrey De Vere… or rather, the story of his daughter… [action] still of inspired young nurse; music turns heroic] For it was her courage, foresight and understanding that enabled us to probe beneath the sophisticated veneer of… [action] impressive college grounds] the Royal Arsenal Women's College, Bagshot… [action] zoom toward building, then veer to a solitary bush; seedy fellow emerges in stained lightweight suit] Len Hanky! Chiropodist, voyeur, hen-teaser. The man of whom the chairman of Fiat once said… + +00:02:24.000 --> 00:02:34.000 +[action] High-powered Italian office. Chairman at desk answers phone, zooms in on executive face. + +00:02:34.000 --> 00:02:40.000 + +Che cosa è lo succiacatori do polli? + +00:02:40.000 --> 00:02:46.000 +[caption] SUPER: What is a hen-teaser? + +00:02:46.000 --> 00:03:50.000 + +Yes! Tonight we examine the career of Gino Agnelli! The man who started from nothing to build up one of the greatest firms in Europe. [action] Stock film: big car plant] And whose telescope was bought from the shop part-owned by a man who, at the age of eight, stole a penknife from the son of this man's brother's housekeeper's dental hygienist's uncle. [caption] Rapid flashes of stills as mentioned] The Reverend Charlie 'Drooper' Hyper-Squawk Smith [action] Freeze frame starts moving; RAF chaplain lifts self out of cockpit; jumps beside Spitfire] the cleft-palated RAF chaplain, who single-handed shot down over five hundred German chaplains. [action] Smiling, he crosses off another emblem: vicar in German helmet; beside it: '"Here we come Kraut" Luke 17, verse 3'] This is the story of the men who flew with him… it really is! [action] Squadron leader, just off a mission, runs past and dashes into a Nissen hut] + +00:03:50.000 --> 00:04:00.000 +[caption] SUPER: DRAMA! ACTION! + +00:04:00.000 --> 00:04:20.000 +[action] Norway coast at night. Tense build-up: guns, fortifications, grappling hooks over cliff. Germans in haloes, pink tutus, jackboots, wands charge; guns blaze. + +00:04:20.000 --> 00:05:40.000 + +Yes! Coming to this cinema soon! [action] Stock: destroyer in sea battle; victory-at-sea music] The tender compassionate story of one man's love for another man in drag. [action] Sailor calls to captain in evening gown] THRILL! to the excitement of a night emission over Germany. [caption] SUPER: THRILL!] [action] Bombers on night raid; flak flashes cabin] When the pilot, Jennifer [action] pilot close-up] has to choose between his secret love for Louis, [action] navigator close-up] the hot-bloodedly bi-sexual navigator and Andy, [action] rear gunner] the rear gunner, who, though quite assertive with girls, tends to take the submissive role in his relationships with men. [action] Gritty pipe-smoking RAF top brass close-up] And sensational Mexican starlet, Rosetta Nixon, plays the head of bomber command, [action] insert WAAF] whose passion for sea-birds ends in tragedy. [action] Montage: war footage, explosions, guns] With Ginger, as the half-man, half-woman, parrot whose unnatural instincts brought forbidden love in the aviary. And Roger as Pip, the half-parrot, half-man, half-woman, three-quarter badger, ex-bigamist negro preacher, for whom banjo-playing was very difficult, and he never mastered it although he took several courses and went to banjo college … er … and everything … don't miss it! + +00:05:40.000 --> 00:05:50.000 +[caption] Rapid SUPERs: DRAMA | SUSPENSE | THRILLS | MARQUETRY | ADVENTURES | DON'T MISS IT | COMING TO YOUR CINEMA SOON + +00:05:50.000 --> 00:06:08.000 + +Coming to your cinema soon! [action] Cut to Indian restaurant] Only five minutes from this restaurant! But now! + +00:06:08.000 --> 00:06:16.000 +[action] Nude organist plays; 'It's' man enters. + +00:06:16.000 --> 00:06:20.000 + +It's … + +00:06:20.000 --> 00:06:40.000 +[caption] Opening titles sequence + +00:24:00.000 --> 00:26:30.000 +[action] End credits roll over 'When Does a Dream Begin' (Neil Innes). Superimposed credits list cast/crew and humorous social class notes. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_42__Light_entertainment_war/10_The_last_five_miles_of_the_M2.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_42__Light_entertainment_war/10_The_last_five_miles_of_the_M2.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..170af2f8 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_42__Light_entertainment_war/10_The_last_five_miles_of_the_M2.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,22 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Ladies watch motorway; planners discuss. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:10.000 +[action] Two ladies watch TV; film of motorway from bank beside a bridge. + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:14.000 + +At last they done been put on something interesting. + +00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:16.000 + +Oh, most interesting. + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:24.000 +[action] Cut back to programme planners' conference. + +00:00:24.000 --> 00:00:40.000 + +[reading figures] … motorways extremely popular … Leicester bypass repeat ratings 97,300,912; ITV zero … propose B roads series. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_42__Light_entertainment_war/11_Woody_and_tinny_words.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_42__Light_entertainment_war/11_Woody_and_tinny_words.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..a81ef4b4 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_42__Light_entertainment_war/11_Woody_and_tinny_words.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,296 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Upper-class family discusses woody vs tinny words; pilot enters with banter. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:12.000 +[animation/action] 'What a lovely day.' Exterior: tasteful Georgian house and gardens; serene soundscape; off-screen Red Indian struggles against rope bonds; cracked record plays 'Where Does a Dream Begin'. + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:18.000 +[caption] 1942 | EGYPT (struck through) | ECUADOR (struck through) | ETHIOPIA (struck through) | ENGLAND + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:24.000 +[action] Upper-class drawing room. Father, mother, daughter having tea. Four motionless servants behind. + +00:00:24.000 --> 00:00:26.000 + +I say… + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:28.000 + +Yes, Daddy? + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:32.000 + +Croquet hoops look damn pretty this afternoon. + +00:00:32.000 --> 00:00:34.000 + +Frightfully damn pretty. + +00:00:34.000 --> 00:00:38.000 + +They're coming along awfully well this year. + +00:00:38.000 --> 00:00:42.000 + +Yes, better than your Aunt Lavinia's croquet hoops. + +00:00:42.000 --> 00:00:44.000 + +Ugh! - dreadful tin things. + +00:00:44.000 --> 00:00:46.000 + +I did tell her to stick to wood. + +00:00:46.000 --> 00:00:52.000 + +Yes, you can't beat wood… Gorn! + +00:00:52.000 --> 00:00:54.000 + +What's gorn dear? + +00:00:54.000 --> 00:01:04.000 + +Nothing, nothing, I just like the word, it gives me confidence. Gorn… gorn. It's got a sort of woody quality about it. Gorn. Gorn. Much better than 'newspaper' or 'litterbin'. + +00:01:04.000 --> 00:01:06.000 + +Frightful words! + +00:01:06.000 --> 00:01:08.000 + +Perfectly dreadful! + +00:01:08.000 --> 00:01:14.000 + +Ugh! Newspaper!… litterbin… dreadful tinny sort of words. Tin, tin, tin. + +00:01:14.000 --> 00:01:18.000 +[action] Daughter bursts into tears. + +00:01:18.000 --> 00:01:22.000 + +Oh, dear, don't say 'tin' to Rebecca, you know how it upsets her. + +00:01:22.000 --> 00:01:24.000 + +[to the daughter] Sorry, old horse. + +00:01:24.000 --> 00:01:26.000 + +Sausage! + +00:01:26.000 --> 00:01:30.000 + +Sausage… there's a good woody sort of word, 'sausage'… gorn. + +00:01:30.000 --> 00:01:32.000 + +Antelope! + +00:01:32.000 --> 00:01:36.000 + +Where? On the lawn? [action] Picks up a rifle] + +00:01:36.000 --> 00:01:38.000 + +No, no, daddy… just the word. + +00:01:38.000 --> 00:01:42.000 + +Don't want an antelope nibbling the hoops. + +00:01:42.000 --> 00:01:46.000 + +No, antelope… sort of nice and woody type of thing. + +00:01:46.000 --> 00:01:48.000 + +Don't think so, Becky old chap. + +00:01:48.000 --> 00:01:54.000 + +No, no 'antelope', 'antelope' - tinny sort of word. [action] Daughter bursts into tears] Oh, sorry old man. + +00:01:54.000 --> 00:01:56.000 + +Really, Mansfield. + +00:01:56.000 --> 00:02:04.000 + +Well, she's got to come to terms with these things… seemly… prodding… vacuum… leap… + +00:02:04.000 --> 00:02:06.000 + +[miserably] Hate 'leap'. + +00:02:06.000 --> 00:02:08.000 + +Perfectly dreadful. + +00:02:08.000 --> 00:02:12.000 + +Sort of PVC-y sort of word, don't you know. + +00:02:12.000 --> 00:02:14.000 + +Lower-middle. + +00:02:14.000 --> 00:02:16.000 + +Bound! + +00:02:16.000 --> 00:02:18.000 + +Now you're talking! + +00:02:18.000 --> 00:02:22.000 + +Bound… Vole… Recidivist. + +00:02:22.000 --> 00:02:26.000 + +Bit tinny. [action] Daughter howls] Oh! Sorry, Becky old beast. [action] Daughter runs out crying] + +00:02:26.000 --> 00:02:30.000 + +Oh dear, I suppose she'll be gorn for a few days now. + +00:02:30.000 --> 00:02:32.000 + +Caribou! + +00:02:32.000 --> 00:02:34.000 + +Splendid word. + +00:02:34.000 --> 00:02:36.000 + +No, dear… nibbling the hoops. + +00:02:36.000 --> 00:02:38.000 + +[action] He fires a shot] Caribou gorn. + +00:02:38.000 --> 00:02:40.000 +[action] Mother laughs politely. + +00:02:40.000 --> 00:02:42.000 + +Intercourse. + +00:02:42.000 --> 00:02:44.000 + +Later, dear. + +00:02:44.000 --> 00:03:00.000 + +No, no, the word, 'intercourse' - good and woody… Inter… course… pert… pert thighs… botty, botty botty… [action] Mother leaves room] … erogenous… zone… concubine… erogenous zone! Loose woman… erogenous zone… [action] Mother returns and throws bucket of water over him] Oh, thank you, dear… you know, it's a funny thing, dear… all the naughty words sound woody. + +00:03:00.000 --> 00:03:02.500 + +Really, dear?… how about tit? + +00:03:02.500 --> 00:03:08.000 + +Oh dear, I hadn't thought about that. Tit. Tit. Oh, that's very tinny, isn't it? [action] Daughter returns] Ugh! Tinny, tinny… [action] Daughter runs out crying] Oh dear… ocelot… wasp…. yowling… Oh dear, I'm bored… I'd better go and have a bath, I suppose. + +00:03:08.000 --> 00:03:12.000 + +Oh really, must you, dear? You've had nine today. + +00:03:12.000 --> 00:03:16.000 + +All right, I'll sack one of the servants… Simpkins!… nasty tinny sort of name. Simpkins! + +00:03:16.000 --> 00:03:20.000 +[action] Father exits. + +00:03:20.000 --> 00:03:24.000 +[action] Pilot from RAF scene enters. + +00:03:24.000 --> 00:03:28.000 + +I say, mater, cabbage crates coming over the briny. + +00:03:28.000 --> 00:03:30.000 + +[frowns and shakes head] Sorry dear, don't understand. + +00:03:30.000 --> 00:03:34.000 + +Er… cow-catchers creeping up on the conning towers… + +00:03:34.000 --> 00:03:36.000 + +No… sorry… old sport. + +00:03:36.000 --> 00:03:40.000 + +Caribou nibbling at the croquet hoops. + +00:03:40.000 --> 00:03:42.000 + +Yes, Mansfield shot one in the antlers. + +00:03:42.000 --> 00:03:46.000 + +Oh, jolly good show. Is 'Becca about? + +00:03:46.000 --> 00:03:48.000 + +No, she's gorn off. + +00:03:48.000 --> 00:03:52.000 + +What a super woody sort of phrase. 'Gorn orff'. + +00:03:52.000 --> 00:03:56.000 + +Yes, she's gorn orff because Mansfield said tin to her. + +00:03:56.000 --> 00:04:00.000 + +Oh, what rotten luck … oh well … whole afternoon to kill … better have a bath I suppose. + +00:04:00.000 --> 00:04:04.000 + +Oh, Gervaise do sing me a song … + +00:04:04.000 --> 00:04:06.000 + +Oh, OK. + +00:04:06.000 --> 00:04:08.000 + +Something woody. + +00:04:08.000 --> 00:04:22.000 +[action] Pilot launches into enormously loud 'She's going to marry Yum Yum'. Mother has a heart attack and dies; song ends. + +00:04:22.000 --> 00:04:26.000 + +For … she's going to marry Yum Yum … oh crikey. The old song finished her orff. + +00:04:26.000 --> 00:04:28.000 + +[entering] What's urp? + +00:04:28.000 --> 00:04:32.000 + +I'm afraid Mrs Vermin Jones appears to have passed orn. + +00:04:32.000 --> 00:04:34.000 + +Dead, is she? + +00:04:34.000 --> 00:04:36.000 + +'Fraid so. + +00:04:36.000 --> 00:04:40.000 + +What a blow for her. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_42__Light_entertainment_war/12_Show-jumping_(musical).vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_42__Light_entertainment_war/12_Show-jumping_(musical).vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..bbc5abb3 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_42__Light_entertainment_war/12_Show-jumping_(musical).vtt @@ -0,0 +1,53 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Ladies channel-hop to Show Jumping; musical fences as obstacles. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:10.000 +[action] Pull-out from TV to two ladies watching in their sitting room. + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:18.000 + +What I want to know Mrs Elizabeth III, is why they give us crap like that, when there's bits of the Leicester by-pass what have never been shown. Biskwit? + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:22.000 + +[takes biskwit] Oh, thank yew … + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:32.000 +[action] Mrs Mock Tudor toggles switch; Arab boy winces and changes channel. Motorway appears with roller caption; 'Crossroads'-type theme. + +00:00:32.000 --> 00:00:44.000 + +[reading roller caption] Appearing on the M2 were 4,281 Vauxhall Vivas, 2,117 Vauxhall Vivas de luxe, 153 Vauxhall Vivas with … + +00:00:44.000 --> 00:00:56.000 +[action] Mrs Elizabeth III throws switch; boy winces and changes to TV-within-TV of the same pair watching tramps; 'Bloody repeats' gag echoes. + +00:00:56.000 --> 00:01:02.000 + +Hello and welcome to Show-Jumping from White City … + +00:01:02.000 --> 00:01:20.000 + +… and it's Anneli Drummond-Hay on Mr Softee just about to go into jump-off against the clock. The short pause is for the stewards who are repairing the Sound of Music. [action] Stewards organize nuns, Von Trapps, Julie Andrews, children into fence] … Captain Phillips on 'Streuth' just caught one of the nuns at the very start of what would have been a fine clear round. It's a formidable obstacle this Sound of Music - eight nuns high but they're ready now, and singing. [action] Group sings 'The Hills are Alive'; bell goes; rider sets off] + +00:01:20.000 --> 00:01:24.000 + +Quite exciting. + +00:01:24.000 --> 00:01:34.000 + +… beautifully taken, and now she needs to pick up speed for Oklahoma, but not too much. This is where Alan Jones knocked down poor Judd, but … And … she's taken it superbly! + +00:01:34.000 --> 00:01:38.000 + +You notice how we never actually see the horses jump. + +00:01:38.000 --> 00:01:50.000 + +And! She's taken it … [action] We actually see jump over Black and White Minstrels chorus] She's over the Minstrels. She just flicked Leslie Crowther with her tail, but the time's good, and now she turns before coming into the final jump … this is a tough one … It's Ben-Hur - forty-six chariots … 6,000 spectators … 400 slaves, lion-handlers, the Emperor Nero and the entire Coliseum. 198 feet high. 400 years across! + +00:01:50.000 --> 00:01:54.000 + +I bet we don't see this one. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_42__Light_entertainment_war/13_Newsflash_(germans).vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_42__Light_entertainment_war/13_Newsflash_(germans).vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..0b1751b2 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_42__Light_entertainment_war/13_Newsflash_(germans).vtt @@ -0,0 +1,11 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Peter Woods interrupts Show Jumping with sentimental war bulletin. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Cut to news studio. Peter Woods at desk. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:20.000 + +We interrupt show jumping to bring you a news flash. The Second World War has now entered a sentimental stage. The morning on the Ardennes Front, the Germans started spooning at dawn, but the British Fifth Army responded by gazing deep in their eyes, and the Germans are reported to have gone 'all coy'. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_42__Light_entertainment_war/14_When_Does_A_Dream_Begin_(song).vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_42__Light_entertainment_war/14_When_Does_A_Dream_Begin_(song).vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..165aef07 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_42__Light_entertainment_war/14_When_Does_A_Dream_Begin_(song).vtt @@ -0,0 +1,37 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. 1940s-style romantic number by Neil Innes; credits roll mid-song. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Music under: 'When Does a Dream Begin'. Mix to young airman gazing into WAAF's eyes. Black & white; soft focus; scratched print. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:20.000 + +When does a dream begin? +Does it start with a goodnight kiss? +Is it conceived or simply achieved +When does a dream begin? + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:34.000 + +Is it born in a moment of bliss? +Or is it begun when two hearts are one +When does a dream exist? + +00:00:34.000 --> 00:00:48.000 + +The vision of you appears somehow +Impossible to resist +But I'm not imagining seeing you +For who could have dreamed of this? + +00:00:48.000 --> 00:01:04.000 + +When does a dream begin? +When reality is dismissed? +Or does it commence when we lose all pretence +When does a dream begin? + +00:01:04.000 --> 00:02:30.000 +[action] Credits begin rolling superimposed partway through song; continue to end signature tune. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_42__Light_entertainment_war/1_Up_Your_Pavement.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_42__Light_entertainment_war/1_Up_Your_Pavement.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..a167b190 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_42__Light_entertainment_war/1_Up_Your_Pavement.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,31 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Includes narration lead-in before RAF Banter anchor. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:20.000 +[action] High street. Banjo theme. Two tramps walk jauntily, nodding and mock-bowing to a city gent. + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:35.000 +[caption] TITLE: 'UP YOUR PAVEMENT' | 'BY THE REV. AND MRS A. G. PHIPPS' | 'FROM AN IDEA BY LORD CARRINGTON' + +00:00:35.000 --> 00:01:05.000 +[action] Tramps retrieve: newspaper, pork pie, champagne, two polished glasses from a litter bin; stroll off. + +00:01:05.000 --> 00:02:20.000 + +Taking life as it comes… [full narrated montage leading to Len Hanky, as in head_tail file; includes Alex Diamond, Dr Emile Koning, Rear-Admiral Humphrey De Vere, Royal Arsenal Women's College, Bagshot, then Len Hanky reveal]. + +00:02:20.000 --> 00:02:30.000 +[action] Italian office; the Chairman answers phone. + +00:02:30.000 --> 00:02:36.000 + +Che cosa è lo succiacatori do polli? + +00:02:36.000 --> 00:02:42.000 +[caption] SUPER: What is a hen-teaser? + +00:02:42.000 --> 00:03:40.000 + +Yes! Tonight we examine the career of Gino Agnelli! …the RAF chaplain narration ending at 'men who flew with him'. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_42__Light_entertainment_war/2_RAF_banter.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_42__Light_entertainment_war/2_RAF_banter.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..dd0975a0 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_42__Light_entertainment_war/2_RAF_banter.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,147 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Banter in RAF officers' mess; ends with cabbage crates news VO. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:05.000 +[caption] SOMEWHERE IN ENGLAND, 1944 + +00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:12.000 +[action] Squadron Leader enters RAF officers' mess, removes helmet. + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:15.000 + +Morning, Squadron Leader. + +00:00:15.000 --> 00:00:18.000 + +What-ho, Squiffy. + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:20.000 + +How was it? + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:32.000 + +Top-hole. Bally Jerry, pranged his kite right in the how's your father. Hairy blighter, dicky-birdied, feathered back on his Sammy, took a waspy, flipped over on his Betty Harper's and caught his can in the Bertie. + +00:00:32.000 --> 00:00:36.000 + +Er, I'm afraid I don't quite follow you, Squadron Leader. + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:48.000 + +It's perfectly ordinary banter, Squiffy. Bally Jerry… pranged his kite right in the how's yer father… hairy blighter, dicky-birdied, feathered back on his Sammy, took a waspy, flipped over on his Betty Harper's and caught his can in the Bertie. + +00:00:48.000 --> 00:00:54.000 + +No, I'm just not understanding banter at all well today. Give us it slower. + +00:00:54.000 --> 00:00:58.000 + +Banter's not the same if you say it slower, Squiffy. + +00:00:58.000 --> 00:01:04.000 + +Hold on then. [action] Shouts] Wingco! + +00:01:04.000 --> 00:01:06.000 + +Yes! + +00:01:06.000 --> 00:01:12.000 + +Bend an ear to the Squadron Leader's banter for a sec, would you? + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:14.000 + +Can do. + +00:01:14.000 --> 00:01:16.000 + +Jolly good. + +00:01:16.000 --> 00:01:18.000 + +Fire away. + +00:01:18.000 --> 00:01:34.000 + +[action] Draws deep breath, starts deliberately] Bally Jerry… pranged his kite… right in how's yer father… hairy blighter… dicky-birdied… feathered back on his Sammy… took a waspy… flipped over on his Betty Harper's and caught his can in the Bertie… + +00:01:34.000 --> 00:01:38.000 + +…No, don't understand that banter at all. + +00:01:38.000 --> 00:01:42.000 + +Something up with my banter, chaps? + +00:01:42.000 --> 00:01:48.000 +[action] Siren. Door bursts open; out-of-breath pilot rushes in in flying gear. + +00:01:48.000 --> 00:01:54.000 + +Bunch of monkeys on the ceiling, sir! Grab your egg and fours and let's get the bacon delivered! + +00:01:54.000 --> 00:02:00.000 +[action] General incomprehension. They look at each other. + +00:02:00.000 --> 00:02:03.000 + +Do you understand that? + +00:02:03.000 --> 00:02:05.000 + +No, didn't get a word of it. + +00:02:05.000 --> 00:02:08.000 + +Sorry old man, we don't understand your banter. + +00:02:08.000 --> 00:02:16.000 + +You know… bally ten-penny ones dropping in the custard… [action] searching for words] un… Charlie Choppers chucking a handful… + +00:02:16.000 --> 00:02:18.000 + +No, no… sorry. + +00:02:18.000 --> 00:02:21.000 + +Say it a bit slower, old chap. + +00:02:21.000 --> 00:02:24.000 + +Slower banter, sir? + +00:02:24.000 --> 00:02:25.500 + +Ra-ther! + +00:02:25.500 --> 00:02:29.000 + +Um… sausage squad up the blue end? + +00:02:29.000 --> 00:02:31.000 + +No, still don't get it. + +00:02:31.000 --> 00:02:35.000 + +Um… cabbage crates coming over the briny? + +00:02:35.000 --> 00:02:36.500 + +No. + +00:02:36.500 --> 00:02:39.000 + +No, no…. + +00:02:39.000 --> 00:02:44.000 +[action] Stock film of a German bombing raid. + +00:02:44.000 --> 00:02:52.000 + +But by then it was too late. The first cabbage crates hit London on July the 7th. That was just the beginning. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_42__Light_entertainment_war/3_Trivializing_the_war.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_42__Light_entertainment_war/3_Trivializing_the_war.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..7fdac7f4 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_42__Light_entertainment_war/3_Trivializing_the_war.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,109 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. War Office meeting reacting to enemy silliness. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:08.000 +[action] Whitehall war office conference room. General on the phone. Four other generals sit. + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:16.000 + +Five shillings a dozen? That's ordinary cabbages, is it? And what about the bombs?… Good Lord, they are expensive. + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:20.000 +[action] A corporal rushes in. + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:21.500 + +Sir! + +00:00:21.500 --> 00:00:24.000 + +Yes, what is it? + +00:00:24.000 --> 00:00:27.000 + +News from the Western Front, sir. + +00:00:27.000 --> 00:00:28.500 + +Yes … ? + +00:00:28.500 --> 00:00:32.000 + +Big enemy attack at dawn, sir … + +00:00:32.000 --> 00:00:34.000 + +Yes … ? + +00:00:34.000 --> 00:00:42.000 + +Well, the enemy were all wearing little silver halos, sir … and … they had fairy wands with big stars on the end … and … + +00:00:42.000 --> 00:00:44.500 + +They what … ? + +00:00:44.500 --> 00:00:48.000 + +.. and … they had spiders in matchboxes, sir. + +00:00:48.000 --> 00:00:52.000 + +[in disbelief] Good God! How did our chaps react? + +00:00:52.000 --> 00:01:00.000 + +Well, they were jolly interested, sir. Some of them … I think it was the 4th Armoured Brigade, sir, they … well, they went and had a look at the spiders, sir. + +00:01:00.000 --> 00:01:04.000 + +Oh my God! All right, thank you, Shirley. + +00:01:04.000 --> 00:01:08.000 +[action] A blonde WAAF named Shirley emerges from under the table. + +00:01:08.000 --> 00:01:09.500 + +Sir! + +00:01:09.500 --> 00:01:18.000 + +[to a sergeant] Get me the Prime Minister. [action] Sergeant opens door; Churchill stands outside] Not that quickly! [action] Sergeant shuts door] Gentlemen, it's now quite apparent that the enemy are not only fighting this war on the cheap, but they're also not taking it seriously. + +00:01:18.000 --> 00:01:20.500 + +Bastards … + +00:01:20.500 --> 00:01:24.000 + +First they drop cabbages instead of decent bombs … + +00:01:24.000 --> 00:01:27.000 + +The crates were probably quite expensive, sir. + +00:01:27.000 --> 00:01:31.000 + +Quiet, critic! And now they're doing very silly things in one of the most vital areas of the war! + +00:01:31.000 --> 00:01:33.000 + +What are we going to do, Shirley? + +00:01:33.000 --> 00:01:40.000 + +Well, we've got to act fast before it saps morale. We're going to show these Chinese … + +00:01:40.000 --> 00:01:41.500 + +Germans, sir. + +00:01:41.500 --> 00:01:52.000 + +These Germans … we're going to show them that no British soldier will descend to their level. Anyone found trivialising this war will face the supreme penalty that military law can provide. [action] Holds heroic pose, pauses, breaks pose] That was all right, I think? + +00:01:52.000 --> 00:01:56.000 + +[action] Getting out drinks] Seemed to go quite well. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_42__Light_entertainment_war/4_Courtmartial.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_42__Light_entertainment_war/4_Courtmartial.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..4219f7ad --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_42__Light_entertainment_war/4_Courtmartial.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,55 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Sapper Walters on charges; devolves into song and silliness. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:10.000 +[action] 1940s courtroom. Court martial in progress. Elderly general presides; defense, prosecutor, clerk, guards. + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:26.000 + +Sapper Walters, you stand before this court accused of carrying on the war by other than warlike means - to wit, that you did on April 16th, 1942, dress up as a bag of dainties, flick wet towels at the enemy during an important offensive … + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:28.500 + +Well, sir … + +00:00:28.500 --> 00:00:30.500 + +Shut up! Colonel Fawcett for the prosecution … + +00:00:30.500 --> 00:00:32.500 + +Sir, we all know … + +00:00:32.500 --> 00:00:34.000 + +Shut up! + +00:00:34.000 --> 00:00:36.000 + +I'm sorry? + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:38.000 + +Carry on. + +00:00:38.000 --> 00:00:56.000 + +Sir, we all know the facts of this case; that Sapper Walters, being in possession of expensive military equipment, to wit one Lee Enfield .303 rifle and 72 rounds of ammunition, valued at a hundred and forty pounds three shillings and sixpence, chose instead to use wet towels to take an enemy command post in the area of Basingstoke … + +00:00:56.000 --> 00:00:59.000 + +Basingstoke? Basingstoke in Hampshire? + +00:00:59.000 --> 00:01:02.000 + +No, no, no, sir, no. + +00:01:02.000 --> 00:01:04.000 + +I see, carry on. + +00:01:04.000 --> 00:01:08.000 + +The result of his action was that the enemy … + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_42__Light_entertainment_war/5_Basingstoke_in_Westphalia.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_42__Light_entertainment_war/5_Basingstoke_in_Westphalia.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..c127f527 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_42__Light_entertainment_war/5_Basingstoke_in_Westphalia.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,68 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Continuation inside the court; Cole Porter confusion. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 + +Basingstoke where? + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:07.000 + +Basingstoke in Westphalia, sir. + +00:00:07.000 --> 00:00:09.000 + +Oh I see. Carry on. + +00:00:09.000 --> 00:00:18.000 + +The result of Sapper Walters's action was that the enemy received wet patches upon their trousers and in some cases small red strawberry marks upon their thighs … + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:22.000 + +I didn't know there was a Basingstoke in Westphalia. + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:26.000 + +[slightly irritated] It's on the map, sir. + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:28.000 + +What map? + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:32.000 + +[more irritably] The map of Westphalia as used by the army, sir. + +00:00:32.000 --> 00:00:36.000 + +Well, I've certainly never heard of Basingstoke in Westphalia. + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:44.000 + +[patiently] It's a municipal borough sir, twenty-seven miles north-north east of Southhampton. Its chief manufactures … + +00:00:44.000 --> 00:00:47.000 + +What … Southhampton in Westphalia? + +00:00:47.000 --> 00:00:54.000 + +Yes sir … bricks … clothing. Nearby are remains of Basing House, burned down by Cromwell's cavalry in 1645 … + +00:00:54.000 --> 00:00:57.000 + +Who compiled this map? + +00:00:57.000 --> 00:01:00.000 + +Cole Porter, sir. + +00:01:00.000 --> 00:01:05.000 + +[incredulously] Cole Porter … who wrote 'Kiss Me Kate'? + +00:01:05.000 --> 00:01:14.000 + +No, alas not, sir … this was Cole Porter who wrote 'Anything Goes'. Sir, I shall seek to prove that the man before this court … + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_42__Light_entertainment_war/6_Anything_Goes_In_(song).vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_42__Light_entertainment_war/6_Anything_Goes_In_(song).vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..59f624d4 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_42__Light_entertainment_war/6_Anything_Goes_In_(song).vtt @@ -0,0 +1,180 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Presiding General demands Fawcett’s version; court later joins song. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 + +That's the same one! [singing] 'In olden days a glimpse of stocking …' + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:06.500 + +I beg your pardon, sir? + +00:00:06.500 --> 00:00:12.000 + +[singing] 'In olden days a glimpse of stocking, was looked on as something shocking, now heaven knows, anything goes …' + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:14.000 + +No, this one's different, sir. + +00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:16.000 + +How does it go? + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:18.000 + +What, sir? + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:20.000 + +How does your 'Anything Goes' go? + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:22.000 + +Can I go home now? + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:24.000 + +Shut up! [to Fawcett] Come on! + +00:00:24.000 --> 00:00:40.000 + +[action] Fawcett clears throat; launches into loud, tuneless song] Anything goes in. Anything goes out! Fish, bananas, old pyjamas, Mutton! Beef! and Trout! Anything goes in … + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:42.500 + +No, that's not it … carry on. + +00:00:42.500 --> 00:01:06.000 + +With respect sir, I shall seek to prove that the man before you in the dock being in the possession of the following: one pair of army boots, value three pounds seven and six, one pair of serge trousers, value two pounds three and six, one pair of gaiters value sixty-eight pounds ten shillings, one … + +00:01:06.000 --> 00:01:08.500 + +Sixty-eight pounds ten shillings for a pair of gaiters? + +00:01:08.500 --> 00:01:11.000 + +[dismissively] They were special gaiters, sir. + +00:01:11.000 --> 00:01:12.500 + +Special gaiters? + +00:01:12.500 --> 00:01:16.000 + +Yes, sir, they were made in France. One beret costing fourteen shillings, one pair of … + +00:01:16.000 --> 00:01:18.500 + +What was special about them? + +00:01:18.500 --> 00:01:23.000 + +Oh … they were made of a special fabric, sir. The buckles were made of empire silver instead of brass. The total value of the uniform was there … + +00:01:23.000 --> 00:01:26.000 + +Why was the accused wearing special gaiters? + +00:01:26.000 --> 00:01:30.000 + +[irritably] They were a presentation pair sir, from the regiment. The total value of the uniform … + +00:01:30.000 --> 00:01:34.000 + +Why did they present him with a special pair of gaiters? + +00:01:34.000 --> 00:01:38.000 + +Sir, it seems to me totally irrelevant to the case whether the gaiters were presented to him or not, sir. + +00:01:38.000 --> 00:01:42.000 + +I think the court will be able to judge that for themselves. I want to know why the regiment presented the accused with a special pair of gaiters. + +00:01:42.000 --> 00:01:46.000 + +[stifling impatience] He … used to do things for them. The total value … + +00:01:46.000 --> 00:01:48.500 + +What things? + +00:01:48.500 --> 00:01:52.000 + +[exasperated] He .. he used to oblige them, sir. The total value … + +00:01:52.000 --> 00:01:54.000 + +Oblige them? + +00:01:54.000 --> 00:01:57.000 + +Yes, sir. The total value of the uniform … + +00:01:57.000 --> 00:02:00.000 + +How did he oblige them? + +00:02:00.000 --> 00:02:02.000 + +What sir? + +00:02:02.000 --> 00:02:06.000 + +How did he oblige them? + +00:02:06.000 --> 00:02:10.000 + +[more and more irritated] He … um … used to make them happy in little ways, sir. The total value of the uniform could therefore not have been less than … + +00:02:10.000 --> 00:02:13.000 + +Did he touch them at all? + +00:02:13.000 --> 00:02:16.000 + +Sir! I submit that this is totally irrelevant. + +00:02:16.000 --> 00:02:20.000 + +I want to know how he made them happy. + +00:02:20.000 --> 00:02:24.000 + +[losing his temper] He used to ram things up their … + +00:02:24.000 --> 00:02:29.000 + +[quickly] All right! All right! No need to spell it out! What er … what has the accused to say? + +00:02:29.000 --> 00:02:31.000 + +What, me? + +00:02:31.000 --> 00:02:40.000 + +Yes. What have you got to say? + +00:02:40.000 --> 00:02:58.000 + +What can I say? I mean, how can I encapsulate in mere words my scorn for any military solution? The fultility of modern warfare? And the hypocrisy by which contemporary government applies one standard to violence within the community and another to violence perpetrated by one community upon another? + +00:02:58.000 --> 00:03:06.000 + +I'm sorry, but my client has become pretentious. I will say in his defense that he has suffered … + +00:03:06.000 --> 00:03:10.000 + +Sir! We haven't finished the prosecution! + +00:03:10.000 --> 00:03:28.000 + +Shut up! I'm in charge of this court. [to the court] Stand up! [action] Everyone stands] Sit down! [action] Everyone sits] Go moo! [action] Everyone goes 'moo'] [to Fawcett] See? Right, now, on with the pixie hats! [action] All put on pixie hats with large pointed ears] And order in the skating vicar. [action] A skating vicar arrives and everyone bursts into song] + +00:03:28.000 --> 00:03:44.000 + +Anything goes in. Anything goes out! Fish, bananas, old pyjamas, Mutton! Beef! and Trout! Anything goes in. Anything goes out. [chorus continues] + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_42__Light_entertainment_war/7_Film_trailer.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_42__Light_entertainment_war/7_Film_trailer.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..5781aff7 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_42__Light_entertainment_war/7_Film_trailer.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,28 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Over-the-top war romance trailer preceding opening titles. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[caption] SUPER: DRAMA! ACTION! + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:24.000 +[action] Norway coastal fortress night infiltration; Germans in haloes and tutus storm. + +00:00:24.000 --> 00:01:30.000 + +Yes! Coming to this cinema soon! … [full Voice Over trailer lines through 'don't miss it!'] + +00:01:30.000 --> 00:01:36.000 +[caption] DRAMA | SUSPENSE | THRILLS | MARQUETRY | ADVENTURES | DON'T MISS IT | COMING TO YOUR CINEMA SOON + +00:01:36.000 --> 00:01:46.000 + +Coming to your cinema soon! [action] Indian restaurant] Only five minutes from this restaurant! But now! + +00:01:46.000 --> 00:01:52.000 +[action] Nude organist plays; It's Man prepares. + +00:01:52.000 --> 00:01:56.000 + +It's … + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_42__Light_entertainment_war/8_The_public_are_idiots.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_42__Light_entertainment_war/8_The_public_are_idiots.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..0a27ed2a --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_42__Light_entertainment_war/8_The_public_are_idiots.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,53 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Two ladies with shocking device for an Arab boy; complaint about TV repeats. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:18.000 +[action] Two twin-set-and-pearls ladies (Mrs Elizabeth III, Mrs Mock Tudor) watch TV. Small Arab boy with electrodes stands by; Mrs Elizabeth III holds control box. + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:22.000 + +Bloody repeats! + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:30.000 +[action] She presses switch; the Arab boy flinches in pain and turns off the TV. + +00:00:30.000 --> 00:00:36.000 + +Yes, repeats or war films. It really makes you want to micturate. + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:42.000 + +People on television treat the general public like idiots. + +00:00:42.000 --> 00:00:46.000 + +Well we are idiots. + +00:00:46.000 --> 00:00:49.000 + +Oh no we are not! + +00:00:49.000 --> 00:00:52.000 + +Well I am. + +00:00:52.000 --> 00:00:56.000 + +How do you know you're an idiot? + +00:00:56.000 --> 00:00:58.000 + +Oh, I can show you! + +00:00:58.000 --> 00:01:00.000 + +How? + +00:01:00.000 --> 00:01:02.000 + +Look! + +00:01:02.000 --> 00:01:40.000 +[action] A montage of silly acts: runs headlong into a tree; digs a hole and stands in it; pokes long false nose through letterbox; drinks tea and eats the cup; nails herself to a lorry; dragged away; TV planners watch her with cream bun on hat walking strangely. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_42__Light_entertainment_war/9_Programme_titles_conference.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_42__Light_entertainment_war/9_Programme_titles_conference.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..5732a06b --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_42__Light_entertainment_war/9_Programme_titles_conference.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,259 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. TV planners propose absurd retitles; security man interrupts. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:14.000 + +You see the public are idiots … [action] Conference tag: 'Chief TV Planner'. Turns from window to table piled with drinks] Yes … you might just as well show them the last five miles of the M2 … they'd watch it, eh? + +00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:26.000 +[action] Cut to motorway film on TV; then back to conference room. + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:40.000 + +[reading figures] … and our figures show that the motorways are extremely popular. I mean, last time we showed a repeat of the Leicester bypass our ratings gave us 97,300,912, and ITV nought. So I do feel we ought to give B roads their own series. + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:44.000 + +I'm sorry … we just can't give you a bigger budget. + +00:00:44.000 --> 00:00:46.000 + +Budgie? + +00:00:46.000 --> 00:00:52.000 + +No, he's left I think. Why not? + +00:00:52.000 --> 00:00:56.000 + +We're not the only slice of the cake, you know. + +00:00:56.000 --> 00:01:00.000 + +Wouldn't mind a slice of cake. Nice chocolate cake … delicious … + +00:01:00.000 --> 00:01:08.000 + +I had a budgie once you know, amusing little chap, used to stick his head in a bell … what was his name, now … Joey? … Xerxes? … + +00:01:08.000 --> 00:01:12.000 + +We could repeat them … + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:14.000 + +Re-heat them? + +00:01:14.000 --> 00:01:16.000 + +No, repeat them … + +00:01:16.000 --> 00:01:20.000 + +You don't re-heat cakes. Not chocolate cakes. + +00:01:20.000 --> 00:01:22.000 + +What, repeat the cakes? + +00:01:22.000 --> 00:01:26.000 + +Mr Heath, that was the name of the budgie. + +00:01:26.000 --> 00:01:36.000 + +[looking at his watch] Good Lord, the bar's open! [action] They scramble madly; then] Oh no it isn't, I was looking at the little hand that goes round very fast … + +00:01:36.000 --> 00:01:40.000 + +Damn. Blast. + +00:01:40.000 --> 00:01:44.000 +[action] They sit down again reluctantly. Short pause. + +00:01:44.000 --> 00:01:48.000 + +I've got it. We can retitle the repeats. + +00:01:48.000 --> 00:01:52.000 + +What … give them different names? + +00:01:52.000 --> 00:01:54.500 + +Wouldn't that mean retitling them? + +00:01:54.500 --> 00:01:56.500 + +Brilliant! + +00:01:56.500 --> 00:02:00.000 + +Right - all we need is new titles. And they must be damned new! + +00:02:00.000 --> 00:02:04.000 + +How about 'Dad's Navy'? + +00:02:04.000 --> 00:02:06.000 + +Mm, good, good. + +00:02:06.000 --> 00:02:10.000 + +'Up Your Mother Next Door.' + +00:02:10.000 --> 00:02:12.000 + +Even better … + +00:02:12.000 --> 00:02:14.000 + +'Doctor At Bee'! + +00:02:14.000 --> 00:02:15.500 + +What? + +00:02:15.500 --> 00:02:18.000 +[action] Knock at door. + +00:02:18.000 --> 00:02:20.000 + +Someone's knocking at the door. + +00:02:20.000 --> 00:02:22.500 + +Quite like it - bit long, though, I think. + +00:02:22.500 --> 00:02:24.500 + +Far too long. + +00:02:24.500 --> 00:02:27.500 + +'I Married Lucy.' + +00:02:27.500 --> 00:02:30.000 + +Hasn't that been done? + +00:02:30.000 --> 00:02:34.000 + +Oh, yes, a long time ago, though, they'd never remember it. + +00:02:34.000 --> 00:02:36.500 + +'Doctor at Three'! + +00:02:36.500 --> 00:02:38.000 + +What? + +00:02:38.000 --> 00:02:40.000 +[action] Knock at door. + +00:02:40.000 --> 00:02:43.000 + +I think someone's knocking at the door. + +00:02:43.000 --> 00:02:45.000 + +That's even longer! + +00:02:45.000 --> 00:02:48.000 + +'I Married A Tree.' + +00:02:48.000 --> 00:02:50.000 + +'And Mother Makes Tree.' + +00:02:50.000 --> 00:02:52.500 + +'Doctor At Cake'! + +00:02:52.500 --> 00:02:56.500 +[action] Continuous knocking on the door. + +00:02:56.500 --> 00:03:02.000 + +Look! I'm not absolutely certain, but, well I do rather get the impression that there is someone actually knocking on the door at this very moment. + +00:03:02.000 --> 00:03:06.000 + +That's ridiculous. Half the programme gone. Stop lengthening it! + +00:03:06.000 --> 00:03:09.000 + +[desperate] 'I Married A Cake'? + +00:03:09.000 --> 00:03:13.000 + +[over excited] 'I Married Three Rabbit Jelly Moulds'! + +00:03:13.000 --> 00:03:16.000 + +Prefer a cake … specially chocky cake … + +00:03:16.000 --> 00:03:20.000 +[action] Constant hammering. + +00:03:20.000 --> 00:03:24.000 + +[yells from outside] Open the sodding door! + +00:03:24.000 --> 00:03:27.000 + +No, no. You can't say 'sodding' on the television. + +00:03:27.000 --> 00:03:32.000 +[action] Door breaks in. Neo-fascist-looking security man enters in wheelchair with oriental sword through his head. + +00:03:32.000 --> 00:03:34.000 + +You're supposed to knock! + +00:03:34.000 --> 00:03:38.000 + +Sorry, sir, but there's trouble at studio five! + +00:03:38.000 --> 00:03:40.000 + +You're in security, aren't you? + +00:03:40.000 --> 00:03:42.000 + +Yes, sir. + +00:03:42.000 --> 00:03:46.000 + +[triumphantly] Well, you're not allowed to suggest programme titles. [action] Smiles victoriously at others] + +00:03:46.000 --> 00:03:52.000 + +Sir! It's the World War series in studio five - they're not taking it seriously any more. + +00:03:52.000 --> 00:03:55.000 + +You're not allowed to suggest programme titles! + +00:03:55.000 --> 00:04:02.000 + +[action] Security Man switches on TV set] Look! + +00:04:02.000 --> 00:04:06.000 +[action] They rush to monitor; one brushes the sword.] + +00:04:06.000 --> 00:04:08.000 + +Ow! Mind me war wound! + +00:04:08.000 --> 00:04:10.000 + +That's it! Very good title! + +00:04:10.000 --> 00:04:22.000 +[action] On screen: court martial singing 'Anything goes in…' as earlier. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_43__Hamlet/0_Episode43_head_tail.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_43__Hamlet/0_Episode43_head_tail.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..8f0028a5 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_43__Hamlet/0_Episode43_head_tail.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,32 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Intro captions and end credits. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 +[music] Tragic music in background. + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:08.000 +[caption] 'HAMLET' + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:12.000 +[caption] 'BY WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE' + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:16.000 +[caption] 'ACT ONE' + +00:09:30.000 --> 00:09:38.000 +[caption] 'THE END' + +00:09:38.000 --> 00:09:50.000 +[credits] They come on and take bows. Superimposed Python credits in Shakespearean style and graphics. + +00:09:50.000 --> 00:11:20.000 +[credits] MONTY PYTHON / BY WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE / DRAMATIS PERSONAE ... (full credit block as supplied). + +00:11:20.000 --> 00:11:26.000 +[action] Fade out. Fade up on a moor. An explosion has just taken place. Out of the smoke a ragged man walks towards the camera. + +00:11:26.000 --> 00:11:30.000 + +And then… + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_43__Hamlet/10_Dentists.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_43__Hamlet/10_Dentists.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..6db2d49f --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_43__Hamlet/10_Dentists.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,32 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Starts at anchor #10. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 +[action] Cut to dentist's surgery. Dentist is filling a patient; talks to camera. + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[caption] 'LIVE FROM EPSOM' + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:12.000 + +Well over here at Epsom, there are chances a-plenty for those who want to make a good start in… + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:13.500 + +Dentistry. + +00:00:13.500 --> 00:00:21.000 + +Dentistry. It's a well-off suburb, so most people have their own teeth and surgeries are opening at a rate of four or five a week. + +00:00:21.000 --> 00:00:26.000 +[action] Cut to housewife in back garden in front of washing line with nasty stained washing, torn sheet with chocolate biscuit, huge bra, bacon and egg pegged, more dirty washing. + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:28.000 +[caption] 'LIVE FROM EPSOM' + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:36.000 + +Well, it's only forty-four minutes from the West End on the train and it's not too built up, so you can have a nice garden. And the people of Epsom are a very nice class of person. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_43__Hamlet/11_Live_from_Epsom.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_43__Hamlet/11_Live_from_Epsom.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..d58fe5a8 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_43__Hamlet/11_Live_from_Epsom.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,93 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Starts at anchor #11. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:03.000 +[caption] 'LIVE FROM EPSOM' + +00:00:03.000 --> 00:00:18.000 + +Well here in High Street Epsom, There are ample opportunities for all kinds of redevelopment. As you can see, (he indicates old houses) behind me now there are a high level of low density consumer units, still not fully maximizing site value. This could be radically improved by a carefully planned programme of demolition. And of course most of the occupants ere…er…elderly folks, so they wouldn't put up much of a fight. + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:21.000 +[action] Cut to Epsom racecourse; presenter up against paddock rail. + +00:00:21.000 --> 00:00:23.000 +[caption] 'LIVE FROM EPSOM' + +00:00:23.000 --> 00:00:35.000 + +Good afternoon. Well in fact there's still a few minutes to go before the main race on the card this afternoon - the Queen Victoria Handicap. So let's have a quick word with the winner of the last race, one of the season's top jockeys - Ronnie Mau-Mau. [action] (a jockey's cap comes into shot) Good afternoon, Ronnie. + +00:00:35.000 --> 00:00:37.000 + +Good afternoon, Brian. + +00:00:37.000 --> 00:00:41.000 + +[pointing mic down] A very fine ride there, Ronnie. + +00:00:41.000 --> 00:00:44.000 + +Well, a fine horse, Brian. You know you can't go wrong. + +00:00:44.000 --> 00:00:47.000 + +Do you fancy your chances for the Derby? + +00:00:47.000 --> 00:00:50.000 +[vigorously nodding] Oh very definitely, very definitely, indeed, certainly Brian. + +00:00:50.000 --> 00:00:56.000 + +Well, let's just see if a colleague of yours agrees with that. Let's just have a quick word with Desmond Willet. Afternoon Des. + +00:00:56.000 --> 00:00:58.000 +[action] Another different silk hat comes into frame. + +00:00:58.000 --> 00:01:01.000 + +[Irish accent] Afternoon, Brian. [action] (shakes head) No chance, no chance at all. + +00:01:01.000 --> 00:01:05.000 +[nodding vigorously] No, no I think you're wrong there, Des, with the right kind of going, he's going to be in there at the finish, Des. + +00:01:05.000 --> 00:01:08.000 +[shaking vigorously] No chance, there's no chance. + +00:01:08.000 --> 00:01:12.000 + +Well in fact I can see last season's top jockey, Johnny Knowles. [action] (two caps move over) Good afternoon, Johnny. + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:14.000 +[action] Pause. Not even a cap is seen. + +00:01:14.000 --> 00:01:15.500 + +[faintly] Hello Brian. + +00:01:15.500 --> 00:01:19.000 +Er, could we have a box for Johnny please. [action] (a cap comes into sight) Thank you. + +00:01:19.000 --> 00:01:20.500 + +Hello Brian. + +00:01:20.500 --> 00:01:24.000 + +Thats better. Well there you are. Three well-known faces from the racing world. Thanks very much for coming along this afternoon, lads. + +00:01:24.000 --> 00:01:26.500 +Not at all. [action] (vigorous nodding of caps) + +00:01:26.500 --> 00:01:28.500 + +And the best wishes for the Derby. + +00:01:28.500 --> 00:01:31.000 +Ah, thank you, Brian, Thanks very much. [action] (they leave nodding) + +00:01:31.000 --> 00:01:36.000 + +Well in fact I hear they're ready for us now at the start of the main race this afternoon. So let's go right away and join Peter at the start. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_43__Hamlet/12_Queen_Victoria_Handicap.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_43__Hamlet/12_Queen_Victoria_Handicap.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..ce1efd3d --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_43__Hamlet/12_Queen_Victoria_Handicap.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,92 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Starts at anchor #12. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 +[caption] '3.15 QUEEN VICTORIA HANDICAP' + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:08.000 +[action] View of starting stalls; cannot see inside. + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:40.000 + +Well they're under starter's orders for this very valuable Queen Victoria Handicap. And they're off, [action] (doors fly open; eight identically dressed Queen Victorias bustle off) and Queen Victoria got a clean jump off, followed by Queen Victoria, Queen Victoria and Queen Victoria. It's Queen Victoria from Queen Victoria and Queen Victoria. It's Queen Victoria making the early running on the inside. And at the back Queen Victoria already a couple of lengths behind the leaders. Queen Victoria has now moved up to challenge Queen Victoria with Queen Victoria losing ground. Queen Victoria tucked in neatly on the stand side with a clear view. Queen Victoria still the back marker as they approach the halfway mark, but making ground now, suddenly past Queen Victoria with Queen Victoria, Queen Victoria and Queen Victoria still well placed as they approach the first fence. + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:46.000 +[action] Low angle shot as Queen Victorias appear over fence and thunder towards camera. + +00:00:46.000 --> 00:00:56.000 + +And at the first fence it's Queen Victoria just ahead of Queen Victoria and Queen Victoria falling away in third place. And Queen Victoria in the lead as they … + +00:00:56.000 --> 00:01:02.000 +[action] Cut back to presenter in studio; completely dressed as Queen Victoria, apart from face. + +00:01:02.000 --> 00:01:12.000 + +Well a very exciting race there at Epsom. And now over to the European Cup at Barcelona where the latest news is that Miguel Otana, the burly Real Madrid striker, was sent off for breaking wind in the forty-third minute. He'd already been cautioned for pursing his lips earlier on in the game and now he's off! So let's see a playback of that … Brian. + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:24.000 +[action] Cut to Brian, similarly dressed. Brief stock shot of football match; cut back to Brian. + +00:01:24.000 --> 00:01:40.000 + +Yes … er … well as you can see … there's Otana now … he gets the … er … through ball from Gomez … and er … he makes no attempt to play the ball. He quite deliberately lets off! And to my mind he was within the box and the referee had no option whatsoever but to send him off. + +00:01:40.000 --> 00:01:42.000 +[action] Cut to the presenter. + +00:01:42.000 --> 00:01:44.000 + +Jimmy? + +00:01:44.000 --> 00:01:48.000 +[action] Cut to the real Jimmy Hill dressed as Queen Victoria, veil, crown and all. + +00:01:48.000 --> 00:01:49.500 + +Good evening. + +00:01:49.500 --> 00:01:52.000 + +What do you make of that? + +00:01:52.000 --> 00:02:06.000 + +Well the referees really are clamping down these days. Only last week the Belgian captain was sent off for having a Sony radio cassette player. And Gonerelli, the huge Italian defender, was sent off in Turin for having his sitting and dining room knocked through to form an open living area. + +00:02:06.000 --> 00:02:08.000 + +Hamlet? + +00:02:08.000 --> 00:02:10.000 +[action] Cut to Hamlet. + +00:02:10.000 --> 00:02:12.000 + +Good evening. + +00:02:12.000 --> 00:02:16.000 +[action] Cut quickly back to presenter. + +00:02:16.000 --> 00:02:20.000 + +Well you've got the girl on the bed and her legs up on the mantelpiece … + +00:02:20.000 --> 00:02:23.000 +[action] Nurse enters. + +00:02:23.000 --> 00:02:28.000 + +Out, out, come on, come on, out … [action] (hustles presenter out of studio) + +00:02:28.000 --> 00:02:32.000 +[animation] Animated sketch. [caption] 'ACT FIVE - A HAM IN THE CASTLE' + +00:02:32.000 --> 00:02:36.000 +[action] Mix to theatre set; all cast dressed as Queen Victorias except Hamlet and Ophelia. + +00:02:36.000 --> 00:02:42.000 + +Let four captains bear Hamlet like a soldier to the stage. For he was likely had he been put on to have proved most royally … + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_43__Hamlet/1_Bogus_psychiatrists.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_43__Hamlet/1_Bogus_psychiatrists.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..b013a20f --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_43__Hamlet/1_Bogus_psychiatrists.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,212 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Starts at anchor #1. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:10.000 +[action] Big American car skids round a corner; montage of tires, accelerator; deafening soundtrack; halts in Harley Street area. Hamlet (black leotard, make-up, small crown) enters doorway, presses doorbell; cut to modern psychiatrist's office; Hamlet on couch. + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:16.000 + +It's just that everywhere I go it's the same old thing. All anyone wants me to say is 'To be or not to be …' + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:22.000 + +… that is the question. Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous … + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:27.000 + +[aside] (quickly) Yes, it's either that, or 'Oh that this too solid flesh would melt …' + +00:00:27.000 --> 00:00:35.000 + +[aside] (taking over) '… would melt, thaw and resolve itself into a dew. Or that the everlasting had not fixed his canon 'gainst self slaughter …' + +00:00:35.000 --> 00:00:39.000 + +Yes. All that sort of thing. And I'm just getting really fed up. + +00:00:39.000 --> 00:00:44.000 +[action] (picking up a skull) Now do the bit about 'Alas poor Yorick …' + +00:00:44.000 --> 00:00:49.000 + +No. I'm sick of it! I want to do something else. I want to make something of my life. + +00:00:49.000 --> 00:00:52.000 + +No. I don't know that bit. + +00:00:52.000 --> 00:00:56.000 + +I want to get away from all that. Be different. + +00:00:56.000 --> 00:01:00.000 + +Well um … what do you want to be? + +00:01:00.000 --> 00:01:03.000 + +A private dick! + +00:01:03.000 --> 00:01:06.000 + +A private dick? + +00:01:06.000 --> 00:01:09.000 + +Yes, a private dick! + +00:01:09.000 --> 00:01:13.000 + +Why do you want to be a private dick? + +00:01:13.000 --> 00:01:19.000 + +Ooh … why does anyone want to be a private dick? Fame, money, glamour, excitement, sex! + +00:01:19.000 --> 00:01:22.000 + +Ah! It's the sex, is it? + +00:01:22.000 --> 00:01:25.000 + +Well, that's one of the things, yes. + +00:01:25.000 --> 00:01:28.000 + +Yes, what's the sex problem? + +00:01:28.000 --> 00:01:31.000 + +Well, there's no problem. + +00:01:31.000 --> 00:01:38.000 + +Now, come on, come on. You've got the girl on the bed and she's all ready for it. + +00:01:38.000 --> 00:01:41.000 + +No, no, it's nothing to do with that. + +00:01:41.000 --> 00:01:52.000 + +[excited] Now come on, come on, there she is, she's all ready for it. She's a real stunner, she's got great big tits, she's really well stacked and you've got her legs up against the mantelpiece. + +00:01:52.000 --> 00:01:58.000 + +All right, Mr Butler, I'll take over. [action] (a distinguished-looking man in a suit enters; the psychiatrist leaves) Morning, Mr Hamlet. My name's Natal. Sorry to keep you waiting. Now what seems to be the problem? + +00:01:58.000 --> 00:02:02.000 + +Well, I was telling the other psychiatrist … + +00:02:02.000 --> 00:02:05.000 + +He's … he's not a psychiatrist. + +00:02:05.000 --> 00:02:09.000 + +Oh. He said he was a psychiatrist. + +00:02:09.000 --> 00:02:20.000 + +Well … yes … um, he's a kind of psychiatrist he's … he's not a proper psychiatrist. He's not er … fully qualified … in, um, quite the sort of way we should want. Anyway the problem I believe is basically sexual is it? + +00:02:20.000 --> 00:02:23.000 +[action] The psychiatrist puts his head round door. + +00:02:23.000 --> 00:02:26.000 + +I asked him that! + +00:02:26.000 --> 00:02:34.000 + +Get out! [action] (the psychiatrist goes; to Hamlet) Now then, you've got the girl on the bed. You've been having a bit of a feel up during the evening. You've got your tongue down her throat. She's got both her legs up on the mantelpiece … + +00:02:34.000 --> 00:02:38.000 +[action] Enter a distinguished-looking psychiatrist in a white coat. + +00:02:38.000 --> 00:02:42.000 + +[authoritative] Dr Natal … out please! + +00:02:42.000 --> 00:02:46.000 + +I'm talking to a patient! Oh … [action] (he goes) + +00:02:46.000 --> 00:03:20.000 + +Out please! I'm terribly sorry, sir. We have a lot of problems here with bogus psychiatrists. One of the risks in psychiatry I'm afraid. Unfortunately they do tend to frighten the patient and they can cause real and permanent damage to the treatment. But I assure you that I am a completely bona fide psychiatrist. Here's my diploma in psychiatry from the University of Oxford. This here shows that I'm a member of the British Psychiatric Association, a very important body indeed. Here's a letter from another psychiatrist in which he mentions that I'm a psychiatrist. This is my Psychiatric Club tie, and as you can see the cufflinks match. I've got a copy of 'Psychiatry Today' in my bag, which I think is pretty convincing. And a letter here from my mother in which she asks how the psychiatry is going, and I think you'll realize that the one person you can't fool is your mother. So if you'd like to ask me any questions about psychiatry, I bet I can answer them. + +00:03:20.000 --> 00:03:24.000 + +No, no, it's all right, really. + +00:03:24.000 --> 00:03:34.000 + +OK, you've got this girl on your bed, you've had a few drinks, you've got her stretched out and her feet on the mantelpiece … [action] (the intercom buzzes) yes, what is it? + +00:03:34.000 --> 00:03:38.000 + +There's a proper psychiatrist to see you, Dr Rufus Berg. + +00:03:38.000 --> 00:03:46.000 +Oh, oh my God! Ok, thank you. [action] (he hurriedly changes into a police constable's uniform) Right, thank you very much for answering the questions, sir. We'll try not to trouble you again, sir. [action] (exits hurriedly) + +00:03:46.000 --> 00:03:49.000 +[action] A fourth psychiatrist rushes in. + +00:03:49.000 --> 00:03:54.000 + +Right you've got the girl down on the bed, you've got her legs up on the mantelpiece. + +00:03:54.000 --> 00:04:00.000 +[action] Two men in white coats bundle him out. Dr Natal Enters. + +00:04:00.000 --> 00:04:05.000 + +Well, well done, Mr Hamlet. You've done extremely well in our disorientation tests. + +00:04:05.000 --> 00:04:07.000 + +Oh? Oh! + +00:04:07.000 --> 00:04:18.000 + +You see, I'm sorry it might have confused you a little, but we do this to try to establish a very good doctor/patient relationship, you see … we do it to sort of, as it were, to break down the barriers. All right? + +00:04:18.000 --> 00:04:21.000 + +Yes fine. + +00:04:21.000 --> 00:04:26.000 + +Good! Well, you've got her legs up on the mantelpiece … + +00:04:26.000 --> 00:04:31.000 +[action] The two men come in and chase him out. Cut to a man at a consultant's desk in a smart West End surgery. + +00:04:31.000 --> 00:04:34.000 +[caption] 'DR BRUCE GENUINE, CHAIRMAN OF THE PSYCHIATRIC ASSOCIATION' + +00:04:34.000 --> 00:04:54.000 + +On behalf of the Psychiatric Association, I should like to say that we are taking firm action to clamp down on the activities of bogus psychiatrists. In fact in many areas of modern psychiatry computers are now being increasingly used for the first basic diagnosis and this has gone a long way in eliminating the danger of unqualified impostors. + +00:04:54.000 --> 00:05:00.000 +[action] Cut to Hamlet in an office. A big, impressive-looking computer beside him. + +00:05:00.000 --> 00:05:06.000 + +[tinny computer voice] You've had your tongue down her throat and she's got her legs on the mantelpiece. + +00:05:06.000 --> 00:05:10.000 +[action] The door opens and a nurse appears. + +00:05:10.000 --> 00:05:12.000 + +Out! + +00:05:12.000 --> 00:05:24.000 +[action] The computer scuttles for the door, revealing six pairs of legs underneath in pin-striped trousers and expensive shoes. Cut to the same computer in a field. The nurse picks up a bazooka. The computer rises; she fires; it explodes. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_43__Hamlet/2_Nationwide.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_43__Hamlet/2_Nationwide.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..30b5ba6f --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_43__Hamlet/2_Nationwide.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,11 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Starts at anchor #2. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 +[music] 'Nationwide' type music and credits. Michael Charlton in a studio. + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:35.000 + +Good evening and welcome to 'Nationwide'. The programme where we do rather wet things nationally and also give you the chance to see some rather wet items in the Regions. Well, everyone is talking about the Third World War which broke out this morning. But here on 'Nationwide' we're going to get away from that a bit and look instead at the latest theory that sitting down regularly in a comfortable chair can rest your legs. It sounds very nice doesn't it, but can it be done? Is it possible or practical for many of us in our jobs and with the sort of busy lives we lead to sit down in a comfortable chair just when we want? We sent our reporter John Dull to find out. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_43__Hamlet/3_Police_helmets.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_43__Hamlet/3_Police_helmets.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..d6e0b335 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_43__Hamlet/3_Police_helmets.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,194 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Starts at anchor #3. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Reporter sits in a chair on Westminster Bridge. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:20.000 + +Well, here I am on London's busy Westminster Bridge, seeing just how much time sitting down can take. Well, I arrived here by train at about 8:50, it's now 9:05, so I've been here approximately twelve minutes and if it's any encouragement, I must say that my legs do feel rested. + +00:00:20.000 --> 00:00:23.000 +[action] A policeman walks up to him. + +00:00:23.000 --> 00:00:25.000 + +Is this your chair? + +00:00:25.000 --> 00:00:29.000 + +Er … well, no, it's a prop. + +00:00:29.000 --> 00:00:31.000 + +It's been stolen! + +00:00:31.000 --> 00:00:33.000 + +What? + +00:00:33.000 --> 00:00:39.000 + +This belongs to a Mrs Edgeworth of Pinner - she's standing over there. + +00:00:39.000 --> 00:00:43.000 +[action] Cut to worried middle-aged lady across the road holding an identical chair. + +00:00:43.000 --> 00:00:47.000 + +Ah well, it's nothing to do with me. It's just a prop which the BBC … aaargh! + +00:00:47.000 --> 00:00:52.000 +[action] Policeman pushes reporter off and picks up the chair. + +00:00:52.000 --> 00:00:56.000 + +It's got her name on the bottom. [aside] (indicates: Mrs E. Edgeworth) + +00:00:56.000 --> 00:00:59.000 + +Well er … perhaps you'd better give it back to her. + +00:00:59.000 --> 00:01:03.000 + +You don't believe I'm a policeman, do you? + +00:01:03.000 --> 00:01:05.000 + +Yes I do! + +00:01:05.000 --> 00:01:10.000 + +What am I wearing on my head? + +00:01:10.000 --> 00:01:12.000 + +A helmet + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:15.000 + +[correcting] A policeman's helmet! + +00:01:15.000 --> 00:01:16.500 + +Yes. + +00:01:16.500 --> 00:01:20.000 +[action] (taking off his helmet and demonstrating) You see that? + +00:01:20.000 --> 00:01:21.500 + +Yes. + +00:01:21.500 --> 00:01:24.500 + +That little number there? + +00:01:24.500 --> 00:01:26.000 + +Yes. + +00:01:26.000 --> 00:01:31.000 + +That is a Metropolitan Area Identification Code. No helmet is authentic without that number. + +00:01:31.000 --> 00:01:32.500 + +I see. + +00:01:32.500 --> 00:01:41.000 + +Kids helmets, helmets you get in toy shops, helmets you buy at Christmas. None of them is authentic … Hang on. [action] (turns and crosses the busy road) + +00:01:41.000 --> 00:01:43.500 + +Oh could I … + +00:01:43.500 --> 00:01:45.000 + +Hang on! + +00:01:45.000 --> 00:01:58.000 +[action] Policeman seizes second chair from Mrs Edgeworth; clouts her; sits down next to reporter. + +00:01:58.000 --> 00:02:18.000 + +Mind you I didn't join the police force just to wear the helmets you know. That just happens to be one of the little perks. There are plenty of jobs where I could have worn a helmet, but not such a nice helmet. [action] (Mrs Edgeworth is gesticulating; another policeman drags her away) This helmet, I think, beats even some of the more elaborate helmets worn by the Tsar's private army, the so-called Axi red warriors. You know about them? + +00:02:18.000 --> 00:02:21.000 + +Well, no I don't. + +00:02:21.000 --> 00:02:25.000 + +Ah! Their helmets used to look like … you got any paper? + +00:02:25.000 --> 00:02:28.000 + +Well only these scripts. + +00:02:28.000 --> 00:02:44.000 +[action] Policeman grabs a businessman, wrenches briefcase, takes paper, lifts a pen from passer-by. Returns and sits. + +00:02:44.000 --> 00:02:45.500 + +I'll have that! + +00:02:45.500 --> 00:02:47.000 + +I say! + +00:02:47.000 --> 00:03:02.000 +[action] Policeman draws while talking: describes Tsar helmets with gold bands and eagle. + +00:03:02.000 --> 00:03:03.500 + +Yes. + +00:03:03.500 --> 00:03:16.000 + +I think the domed helmet wins every time over the flattened job, you know, even when they're three cornered … [action] (eyes light on two office secretaries opening packed lunch) … you want something to eat? + +00:03:16.000 --> 00:03:20.000 + +[hurried] Well no, er really … + +00:03:20.000 --> 00:03:27.000 +[action] (approaching the girls and getting out his notebook) Hang on. You can't park here you know. + +00:03:27.000 --> 00:03:29.000 + +[bewildered] We're not parked! + +00:03:29.000 --> 00:03:31.000 + +No parked! What's that then? + +00:03:31.000 --> 00:03:33.000 + +That's our lunch. + +00:03:33.000 --> 00:03:37.000 + +Right. I'm taking that in for forensic examination. + +00:03:37.000 --> 00:03:38.500 + +Why? + +00:03:38.500 --> 00:03:46.000 + +Because it might have been used as a murder weapon, that's why! [action] (grabs their lunch) Yeah, not bad. Could be worse. [to the reporter] Beer? + +00:03:46.000 --> 00:03:50.000 + +[desperate] No, no, please … honestly … please … + +00:03:50.000 --> 00:04:00.000 +[action] Policeman walks off; crash of breaking glass; alarm bell rings; returns with two beers; opens with teeth; hands one to reporter. + +00:04:00.000 --> 00:04:10.000 + +Now, the Chaldeans, who used to inhabit the area in between the Tigris and Euphrates rivers, their helmets were of the modular restrained kind of type … + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_43__Hamlet/4_Father-in-law.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_43__Hamlet/4_Father-in-law.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..36d44dd5 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_43__Hamlet/4_Father-in-law.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,230 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Starts at anchor #4. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:08.000 +[music] Lyrical music. [action] Camera pans across road to a couple making love on the pavement. Pedestrians step over them. + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:11.000 + +Oh Robert, tell me I'm beautiful. + +00:00:11.000 --> 00:00:13.000 + +Oh you are, you are! + +00:00:13.000 --> 00:00:16.000 + +Oh Robert, do you mean that? + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:18.000 + +Of course I do. + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:22.000 + +You're not just saying that because I asked you? + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:24.000 + +Of course not. + +00:00:24.000 --> 00:00:28.000 + +Oh Robert … Robert, are you sure it doesn't put you off? + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:29.500 + +What? + +00:00:29.500 --> 00:00:33.000 + +My father wanting to come and live with us. + +00:00:33.000 --> 00:00:36.000 + +No, of course I don't mind your father coming to live with us. + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:38.500 + +He wouldn't just be living with us. + +00:00:38.500 --> 00:00:40.500 + +What do you mean? + +00:00:40.500 --> 00:00:45.000 + +Well, he finds it very difficult to get to sleep on his own, so I said he could sleep with us. + +00:00:45.000 --> 00:00:48.000 + +He wants to put his bed in our room? + +00:00:48.000 --> 00:00:50.000 + +No, no, of course not. + +00:00:50.000 --> 00:00:51.500 + +Oh good … + +00:00:51.500 --> 00:00:55.000 + +Our bed is plenty big enough for three … + +00:00:55.000 --> 00:00:56.500 + +What? + +00:00:56.500 --> 00:00:59.500 + +He'd just get into bed and go to sleep. + +00:00:59.500 --> 00:01:02.000 + +No. I'm not having that. + +00:01:02.000 --> 00:01:04.000 + +Oh Robert, I thought you loved me? + +00:01:04.000 --> 00:01:06.000 + +Well I do, but … + +00:01:06.000 --> 00:01:08.000 + +Well, he wouldn't look. + +00:01:08.000 --> 00:01:10.000 + +He's bound to peek. + +00:01:10.000 --> 00:01:12.500 + +No, no, he wouldn't honestly. + +00:01:12.500 --> 00:01:16.000 + +No! No! No!! + +00:01:16.000 --> 00:01:22.000 +[action] Cut to the three of them in bed. Robert in the middle; Father in striped pyjamas; the others nude. Uncomfortable silence. + +00:01:22.000 --> 00:01:28.000 + +You young couple just carry on. Take no notice of me … [action] (silence; they smile half-heartedly) I don't want to feel as though I'm getting in the way. + +00:01:28.000 --> 00:01:30.000 + +Oh no dad, you're not. + +00:01:30.000 --> 00:01:31.500 + +No, no. + +00:01:31.500 --> 00:01:33.000 + +Good. + +00:01:33.000 --> 00:01:36.000 +[action] Silence again. + +00:01:36.000 --> 00:01:38.500 + +Well, I think I'll get to sleep. + +00:01:38.500 --> 00:01:40.000 + +Are you sure? + +00:01:40.000 --> 00:01:43.000 + +Oh yes, I'm a bit tired after the wedding. + +00:01:43.000 --> 00:01:45.000 + +Bob, what about you? + +00:01:45.000 --> 00:01:47.000 + +Oh yes, all right, yes. + +00:01:47.000 --> 00:01:49.000 + +Oh well, I seem to be O/C lights. + +00:01:49.000 --> 00:01:52.000 + +[aside to Robert] Good night, darling. + +00:01:52.000 --> 00:01:53.500 + +Good night. + +00:01:53.500 --> 00:01:55.000 + +Good night! + +00:01:55.000 --> 00:01:59.000 +[action] He switches the light off. Pitch dark. Long pause. + +00:01:59.000 --> 00:02:10.000 +[sfx] Strange scraping (pencil sharpening), sawing, then knocking; continues for some time. + +00:02:10.000 --> 00:02:12.000 + +Father. Father, what are you doing? + +00:02:12.000 --> 00:02:14.000 + +I'm making a boat. + +00:02:14.000 --> 00:02:15.500 + +What? + +00:02:15.500 --> 00:02:20.000 + +It's the Cutty Sark. It's a model I've been making in the dark for some years now. + +00:02:20.000 --> 00:02:23.000 + +Well, wouldn't it be better with the light on? + +00:02:23.000 --> 00:02:25.000 + +No, no, I'm making it in the dark, that's the point. + +00:02:25.000 --> 00:02:28.000 +[action] Click. Light goes on. He looks disappointed; hands reveal a shapeless mass of wood and nails. + +00:02:28.000 --> 00:02:30.000 + +Oh dear, not as accurate as I thought. + +00:02:30.000 --> 00:02:32.000 + +It's not the Cutty Sark! + +00:02:32.000 --> 00:02:40.000 +Well it hasn't got its sails yet. Oh well I'll … I'll have a look at it in the dark room in the morning. Good night. [action] (grunts; lights off; silence) + +00:02:40.000 --> 00:02:46.000 +[animation] Animated opening titles. + +00:02:46.000 --> 00:02:49.000 +[sfx] Banging on the wall from next door. + +00:02:49.000 --> 00:02:51.000 + +Shut up! Will you shut up in there! + +00:02:51.000 --> 00:02:56.000 +[action] Cut to middle-aged man with small moustache and neat pyjamas banging on wall with an Indian club. + +00:02:56.000 --> 00:02:59.000 + +Shut up! [action] (It goes quiet next door) That's better. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_43__Hamlet/5_Hamlet_and_Ophelia.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_43__Hamlet/5_Hamlet_and_Ophelia.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..cdb31a01 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_43__Hamlet/5_Hamlet_and_Ophelia.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,29 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Starts at anchor #5. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:10.000 +[action] He hangs his club under sign 'The Burlington Wall-banger' and gets into a bed crowded with assorted people watching TV, tear-stained, eating popcorn and crisps. On TV: Hamlet sad speech. + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:16.000 + +I am myself indifferent honest, but then I could accuse me of such things that it were better my mother had not borne me. + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:22.000 +[action] Cut to TV set close-up: Hamlet lying beside Ophelia in austere modern theatre set. + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:26.000 + +O fair Ophelia, nymph, in thy orisons, be all my sins remembered … + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:30.000 + +So anyway, you've got the girl on the bed and her legs are on the mantelpiece … + +00:00:30.000 --> 00:00:33.000 +[action] The nurse from the psychiatrist's office enters. + +00:00:33.000 --> 00:00:36.000 + +Out! [action] (bundles her off) + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_43__Hamlet/6_Boxing_match_aftermath.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_43__Hamlet/6_Boxing_match_aftermath.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..a5b3545c --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_43__Hamlet/6_Boxing_match_aftermath.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,168 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Starts at anchor #6. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:08.000 +[animation] Poster: 'Boxing Tonite! The Killer vs. The Champ. 15 Rounds'. [action] Cut to dressing room at Madison Square Garden; crowd noise; Mr Gabriello and two assistants carry a boxer on a stretcher. + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:16.000 + +That was a great fight, Champ, a great fight, you hear! Oh boy, what a fight, Champ, what a great fight! You nearly had him, Champ, you nearly had him … where's his head? + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:19.000 + +I got it in here, Mr Gabriello. + +00:00:19.000 --> 00:00:24.000 +[action] He holds up a carrier bag. Gabriello looks inside and shouts into it. + +00:00:24.000 --> 00:00:27.000 + +You were great, Champ, d'you hear, you were great! + +00:00:27.000 --> 00:00:30.000 + +[aside, looking in bag] He's got a nasty cut over his eye. + +00:00:30.000 --> 00:00:36.000 + +Yeah, I think it was a mistake him wearing spectacles. [action] (gives the bag to the assistant) Oh well, get that sewn onto his body in time for the press pictures. + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:37.500 + +OK, Mr Gabriello. + +00:00:37.500 --> 00:00:40.000 + +[to second assistant] Wasn't he great my boy? + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:42.000 + +He was great, Mr Gabriello. + +00:00:42.000 --> 00:00:45.000 + +The way he kept fighting after his head came off! + +00:00:45.000 --> 00:00:49.000 + +He was better when the head came off, Mr Gabriello. He was really dodging the guy. + +00:00:49.000 --> 00:00:54.000 + +Yeah, I reckon that if he could've lasted till the end of that first minute, he would've had the Killer worried. + +00:00:54.000 --> 00:00:55.500 + +Sure, Mr Gabriello. + +00:00:55.500 --> 00:00:58.000 + +Oh he was great. Did you see his left arm? + +00:00:58.000 --> 00:00:59.500 + +No! + +00:00:59.500 --> 00:01:02.500 + +OK, we'll look around the hall after everybody's gone. + +00:01:02.500 --> 00:01:07.000 + +Do you realize Mr Gabriello, some of those guys out there paid over $2,000 for a ringside seat. + +00:01:07.000 --> 00:01:13.000 + +And where did the head land? Right at the back, that's justice… [action] (the door opens; a black cleaner comes in) What d'you want? + +00:01:13.000 --> 00:01:16.000 +[action] The cleaner holds up a carrier bag. + +00:01:16.000 --> 00:01:18.000 + +This your boy's head? + +00:01:18.000 --> 00:01:21.000 + +No, no, we've got his head. He ain't hurt that bad. + +00:01:21.000 --> 00:01:24.000 + +[aside, looking in bag] Hey, that's Gerry Marinello. He fought the Killer last week. + +00:01:24.000 --> 00:01:27.000 + +OK, give it to me. I'm seeing his trainer tomorrow. I'll give it to him. + +00:01:27.000 --> 00:01:30.000 +[action] The cleaner is ushered out. + +00:01:30.000 --> 00:01:33.000 + +Hey, Mr Gabriello. The press is still outside. Are you ready for them? + +00:01:33.000 --> 00:01:35.000 + +How's the Champ? + +00:01:35.000 --> 00:01:39.000 +[action] (working away with needle and thread) Well, the head's on OK. But there's still a left arm missing. + +00:01:39.000 --> 00:01:43.000 +OK, well keep the dressing gown kinda loose, OK. [action] (Gabriello opens door) OK boys, come on in! + +00:01:43.000 --> 00:01:46.000 +[action] The press surge in. The fighter is propped up. + +00:01:46.000 --> 00:01:50.000 + +Hey Mr Gabriello, Mr Gabriello. Did you expect your boy to last the full twenty-eight seconds? + +00:01:50.000 --> 00:01:54.000 + +This boy has never let me down. He's the pluckiest goddamn fighter I've ever trained. + +00:01:54.000 --> 00:01:57.000 + +Were you worried when his head started to come loose? + +00:01:57.000 --> 00:02:02.000 + +No, no, we were expecting that. I told them to expect it to and it did. He ain't stupid. + +00:02:02.000 --> 00:02:04.000 + +Hey, can we have a word with the Champ? + +00:02:04.000 --> 00:02:06.000 + +Yeah OK. But keep the questions simple. + +00:02:06.000 --> 00:02:08.000 + +Hey Champ! How're you feeling? + +00:02:08.000 --> 00:02:10.000 + +[angry] I said keep the questions simple! + +00:02:10.000 --> 00:02:14.000 + +Mr Gabriello. People are saying that the kid ought to be buried. His head's come off in the last six fights. + +00:02:14.000 --> 00:02:17.000 + +There's no question of burying the kid. He's just reaching the top. + +00:02:17.000 --> 00:02:20.000 + +Well, shouldn't he just stay in hospital? + +00:02:20.000 --> 00:02:23.000 + +No, he ain't going to no hospital. He's got the return fight next week. + +00:02:23.000 --> 00:02:28.000 +[caption] Shot of 'New York Times' headline: 'Champ to be kept alive for big return'. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_43__Hamlet/7_Boxing_commentary.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_43__Hamlet/7_Boxing_commentary.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..e74e895e --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_43__Hamlet/7_Boxing_commentary.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,26 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Starts at anchor #7. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Hospital ward; numerous doctors and nurses listen to radio. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:26.000 + +And there's Frank Sinatra leaving the ring. Behind him is George Raft, another great boxing fan, Martin Bormann, acknowledging the applause, and with him of course is Gus Himmler, who did an awful lot for the sport in his country in the early 1940s. And here comes the Champ now and he seems in good shape to meet the Killer once again. Before an audience, some of them will have paid $920,000 million for the privilege of seeing this boy get beaten up. And there's the bell. + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:29.000 +[action] Patient having a heart attack on a bed in the corner: 'Aaarghhh!' + +00:00:29.000 --> 00:00:31.000 + +Quiet!! + +00:00:31.000 --> 00:01:12.000 + +And a left and a right and a right jab that's taken the Champ's shoulder off. And here's the Killer again with a right and another left and a bash with a hammer and a terrific smack with a heavy thud right into the skull and there's a gaping hole right through the Champ's body now. And now the Killer's working on the cut eye with a series of beautifully placed punches and the head's coming loose. [action] (doctors and nurses getting increasingly excited) The Champ must try and keep his head on. The Killer's kicked him in the groin and he's bitten half his left buttock off and the referee's stepped in with a warning there. What a plucky fighter this Champ is. He's fighting as well as I've ever seen him. Must be losing blood at a rate of a pint a second now. It's everywhere. Certainly those who paid one and a half million dollars for those ringside seats are really getting their money's worth. They're covered in it. And his head's off! [crowd] (everyone cheers) His head that's come off in so many fights is off in the thirty-first second. It's rolled away down to the left … but what's happening? The Killer's being talked to by the referee. There's the Champ … plucky little body racing around the ring, trying to find his opponent. And the Killer has been disqualified. [action] (pandemonium: some patients cheering, doctors thumping them in disagreement) He's been disqualified … this great fighter who has killed more than twenty people in his career has at last been defeated by this courageous headless little southpaw from New York. And there's a great roar here as the referee raises the arm of the new World Heavyweight Champion. What a pity the rest of his body wasn't there to see it. [action] (general disappointment; someone changes channels) + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:22.000 + +Well here in London it's 12:30 and time for 'The Robinsons'. [crowd] (everyone perks up) An everyday story of bla-di-bl-di-bla … [sings] 'Archers' theme tune … da di da di da di da … and so on. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_43__Hamlet/8_Piston_engine_(a_bargain).vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_43__Hamlet/8_Piston_engine_(a_bargain).vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..f4852951 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_43__Hamlet/8_Piston_engine_(a_bargain).vtt @@ -0,0 +1,178 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Starts at anchor #8. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:03.000 + +[radio] Morning Mrs Robinson. + +00:00:03.000 --> 00:00:05.000 + +[radio] Morning Mrs Non-Robinson. + +00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:06.500 + +Been shopping? + +00:00:06.500 --> 00:00:08.500 + +No, … I've been shopping. + +00:00:08.500 --> 00:00:11.000 +[action] Six cuts to close-ups of different radios during exchange. + +00:00:11.000 --> 00:00:12.500 + +What'd you buy? + +00:00:12.500 --> 00:00:16.000 +[action] Pull out to reveal pepperpot, Mrs Non-Gorilla, on park bench by radio. + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:17.500 + +[radio] A piston engine. + +00:00:17.500 --> 00:00:19.000 + +What d'you buy that for? + +00:00:19.000 --> 00:00:20.500 + +[radio] It was a bargain. + +00:00:20.500 --> 00:00:23.000 + +Bloody rubbish. [action] (turns radio off) + +00:00:23.000 --> 00:00:26.000 +[action] Quick cut: hospital; doctor on bed listening to a radio. It switches off. + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:28.000 + +I wanted to listen to that! + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:31.000 +[action] Back to Mrs Non-Gorilla; another pepperpot approaches. + +00:00:31.000 --> 00:00:33.000 + +Morning Mrs Gorilla. + +00:00:33.000 --> 00:00:35.000 + +Morning Mrs Non-Gorilla. + +00:00:35.000 --> 00:00:37.000 + +Have you been shopping? + +00:00:37.000 --> 00:00:38.500 + +No … been shopping. + +00:00:38.500 --> 00:00:40.500 + +Did you buy anything? + +00:00:40.500 --> 00:00:42.000 + +A piston engine! + +00:00:42.000 --> 00:00:45.000 +[action] She reveals a six-cylinder car engine on a white tray, on a trolley. + +00:00:45.000 --> 00:00:46.500 + +What d'you buy that for? + +00:00:46.500 --> 00:00:48.500 + +Oooh! It was a bargain. + +00:00:48.500 --> 00:00:54.000 +[action] Pan across civic park with pepperpots on benches; one in wheelchair. + +00:00:54.000 --> 00:01:00.000 + +Come on little birdies … come on little birdies … tweet tweet … come and see what mummy's got for you … + +00:01:00.000 --> 00:01:12.000 +[action] Unwraps leg of lamb; hurls at birds; screech; kills a pigeon. Throws pineapple chunks; mayonnaise jar smashes; then frozen turkey, jar of onions, bag of peas, bottle of wine. + +00:01:12.000 --> 00:01:17.000 + +Come on little birdies … tweety tweety … oooh look at this … tweet tweet … ooohhh nice one … come on little birdies … + +00:01:17.000 --> 00:01:26.000 +[action] Area littered with packaged foods and dead birds; a bird pecks at pate; pond with swan upside down; huge tin floating. Mrs Smoker arrives with piston engine. + +00:01:26.000 --> 00:01:28.000 + +Oohh hello, Mrs Smoker. + +00:01:28.000 --> 00:01:29.500 + +Hello Mrs Non-Smoker. + +00:01:29.500 --> 00:01:31.500 + +What, you been shopping then? + +00:01:31.500 --> 00:01:33.500 + +Nope … I've been shopping! + +00:01:33.500 --> 00:01:35.000 + +What d'you buy? + +00:01:35.000 --> 00:01:36.500 + +A piston engine! + +00:01:36.500 --> 00:01:38.500 + +What d'you buy that for? + +00:01:38.500 --> 00:01:40.500 + +It was a bargain! + +00:01:40.500 --> 00:01:42.500 + +How much d'you want for it? + +00:01:42.500 --> 00:01:44.000 + +Three quid! + +00:01:44.000 --> 00:01:46.000 +Done. [action] (hands over money) + +00:01:46.000 --> 00:01:47.500 + +Right. Thank you. + +00:01:47.500 --> 00:01:49.500 + +How d'you cook it? + +00:01:49.500 --> 00:01:51.000 + +You don't cook it. + +00:01:51.000 --> 00:01:53.000 + +You can't eat that raw! + +00:01:53.000 --> 00:01:57.000 + +Ooooh … never thought of that. Oh, day and night, but this is wondrous strange … + +00:01:57.000 --> 00:02:04.000 + +… and therefore is a stranger welcome it. There are more things in Heaven and Earth Horatio, than are dreamt of in your philosophy. But come, the time is out of joint. Oh cursed spite, that ever I was born to set it right. Let's go together. + +00:02:04.000 --> 00:02:08.000 +[action] They get up and go. Fade to black. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_43__Hamlet/9_A_room_in_Polonius's_house.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_43__Hamlet/9_A_room_in_Polonius's_house.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..3d906b37 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_43__Hamlet/9_A_room_in_Polonius's_house.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,14 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Auto-generated timings. Starts at anchor #9. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 +[caption] 'ACT TWO - A ROOM IN POLONIUS'S HOUSE' + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:08.000 +[action] Cut to a Frank Bough type presenter; sports pictures behind. + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:22.000 + +Hello, and welcome to 'A Room in Polonius's House'. Well tonight is European Cup night. One result is already in from Munich. The European Cup, first round, second leg, Bayern München 4397, Wrexham 1. So Wrexham going through there on aggregate. Well, now it's time for racing, so let's go straight over to Epsom and Brian McNutty. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_44__Mr_Neutron/0_Episode44_head_tail.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_44__Mr_Neutron/0_Episode44_head_tail.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..fe8ddbdb --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_44__Mr_Neutron/0_Episode44_head_tail.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,37 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Intro titles, VO setup and end credits/announcer wrap + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:05.000 +[Animated titles.] + +00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:12.000 +A perfectly ordinary morning in a perfectly ordinary English suburb. Life goes on as it has done for years. + +00:20:00.000 --> 00:20:08.000 +Has Mr Neutron escaped in time? Is the world utterly destroyed? How can Mr Neutron and his child bride survive? Will his mighty powers be of any avail against the holocaust? Stay tuned to this channel. + +00:20:08.000 --> 00:20:14.000 + +Hello. Well in fact what happens is that they are saved by Mr Neutron's mighty powers just as the last bomb falls on Ruislip. + +00:20:14.000 --> 00:20:40.000 +[CAPTION: 'A MAN FROM THE "RADIO TIMES"'] + +00:20:40.000 --> 00:21:20.000 + +However, the Earth has been blown off its axis, and in a most dramatic and dangerous and expensive sequence, it spins off into space. There are appallingly expensive scenes of devastation and horror and the final incredibly expensive climax is reached as thousands of ape monsters in very expensive costumes descend from the sky onto these, plug up a whole city which has to be specially built and fling them all into the sea very expensively. And we can see those very expensive scenes right now. Just after the credits have gone through... incidentally, these are going to be the most expensive and lavish scenes ever filmed by the BBC in conjunction with Time-Life of course ... these are some of the technical people who have been involved in filming these very expensive scenes, expensive sound, expensive visual effects there, expensive production assistant, expensive designer... cheap director. Well you can see those expensive scenes right now. + +00:21:20.000 --> 00:21:24.000 +[CAPTION: 'THE END'] + +00:21:24.000 --> 00:21:30.000 + +Oh come on you can give us another minute, Mr Cotton, please. + +00:23:30.000 --> 00:23:36.000 +World Domination t-shirts are available from BBC, World Domination Department, Cardiff. + +00:23:36.000 --> 00:23:40.000 +[A man hits him on the head with an enormous hammer. He falls, stunned. Fade out.] + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_44__Mr_Neutron/1_Post_box_ceremony.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_44__Mr_Neutron/1_Post_box_ceremony.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..2cd4a092 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_44__Mr_Neutron/1_Post_box_ceremony.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,31 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Opens at anchor #1 + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 +[A street in Ruislip, morning. A scrap cart goes down the street.] + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:08.000 + +Let's bring 'em out! Any old iron! Any old iron! + +00:00:08.000 --> 00:00:12.000 +[A housewife brings out a ground-to-air missile system and dumps it on the cart.] + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:14.000 + +Thank you. + +00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:22.000 +[Old ladies bring out bazookas and shells. A GPO van arrives. A pillar box with a cover, a rostrum, PA and bunting are set. A lord mayor is ushered in. Crowd sits.] + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:01:10.000 + +We are here today to witness the opening of a new box to replace the box which used to stand at the corner of Ulverston Road and Sandwood Crescent. Owing to the road-widening programme carried out by the Borough Council, the Ulverston Road box was removed, leaving the wall box in Esher Road as the only box for the Ulverston Road area. This new box will enable the people of the Ulverston Road area to post letters, post-cards and small packages without recourse to the Esher Road box or to the box outside the post office at Turner's Parade which many people used to use, but which has now been discontinued owing to the opening of this box and also the re-organization of box distribution throughout the whole area, which comes into force with the opening of new boxes at the Wyatt Road Post Office in July. [a moment's pause] Nous sommes ici ce matin pour loire témoin à l'ouvermre de la nouvelle boîte pour remplacer la boîte qui autrefois était placée au coin d'Ulverston Road et Sandwood Crescent... [continues in French] [a moment's pause] Wir kommen hier heute Morgen für die Einfang auf dem neue Kabinett für die Poste. + +00:01:10.000 --> 00:01:16.000 +[The first two sentences of the next voice over lay over the end of the French speech.] + +00:01:16.000 --> 00:01:22.000 +A perfectly ordinary morning in a perfectly ordinary English suburb. Life goes on as it has done for years. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_44__Mr_Neutron/2_Mr_Neutron.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_44__Mr_Neutron/2_Mr_Neutron.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..6d0e97da --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_44__Mr_Neutron/2_Mr_Neutron.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,148 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Opens at anchor #2 + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:05.000 +But soon this quiet pattern of life was to change irrevocably... for into this quiet little community came ... Mr Neutron! + +00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:12.000 +[A train stops. Mr Neutron steps out: towering shoulders, piercing eyes, 'Mr Neutron' emblazoned, carrying a Sainsbury's bag.] + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:24.000 +Mr Neutron! The most dangerous and terrifying man in the world! The man with the strength of an army!... Wherever he went, terror and destruction were sure to follow. + +00:00:24.000 --> 00:00:30.000 +[Neutron has tea in his garden with Mr and Mrs Entrail.] + +00:00:30.000 --> 00:00:36.000 +Mr Neutron! The man whose incredible power has made him the most feared man of all time... waits for his moment to destroy this little world utterly! + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:44.000 + +Then there's Stanley ... he's our eldest ... he's a biochemist in Sutton. He's married to Shirley... + +00:00:44.000 --> 00:00:49.000 + +[In a strange disembodied voice] Shirley who used to be the hairdresser? + +00:00:49.000 --> 00:00:55.000 + +Yes, that's right, I think she's a lovely person. My husband doesn't ... he thinks she's a bit flash. + +00:00:55.000 --> 00:00:58.000 + +I hate 'er! I hate 'er guts. + +00:00:58.000 --> 00:01:03.000 + +And they, of course, they come down most weekends, so you'll be able to meet them then. + +00:01:03.000 --> 00:01:07.000 + +l'd ... love ... to. Hairdressing is very interesting. + +00:01:07.000 --> 00:01:16.000 + +And very important, too. If you don't care for your scalp, you get rabies. Then there's Kenneth, he's our youngest... at least my husband thinks he is, anyway. + +00:01:16.000 --> 00:01:20.000 + +Nasty little piece of work, he is, I hate him! + +00:01:20.000 --> 00:01:33.000 + +Mind you, the one we hear so much about nowadays is Karen. She married a Canadian - he's a dentist - they live in Alberta - two lovely children, Gary who's three, Leslie who's six... D'you want to see a photo ... ? + +00:01:33.000 --> 00:01:36.000 + +Oh, yes please. + +00:01:36.000 --> 00:01:38.000 + +All right. + +00:01:38.000 --> 00:01:42.000 +[She goes to get a photograph.] + +00:01:42.000 --> 00:01:55.000 + +They're a couple of little bastards. I hate 'em. They've got eyes like little pigs, just like their mother... He's a real creepy little bastard, he is. I hate 'im. + +00:01:55.000 --> 00:01:58.000 + +This is a nice area. + +00:01:58.000 --> 00:02:01.000 + +It's like a bloody graveyard. I hate it. + +00:02:01.000 --> 00:02:05.000 + +It's handy for the shops and convenient for the West End. + +00:02:05.000 --> 00:02:09.000 + +If you like going to the West End. I think it's a stinking dump. + +00:02:09.000 --> 00:02:14.000 +[Cut to FEAR/FEEBLE HQ in Washington.] + +00:02:14.000 --> 00:02:22.000 +Meanwhile in Washington, at the headquarters of 'FEAR' - the Federal Egg Answering Room - in reality a front name for 'FEEBLE'... all was not well. + +00:02:22.000 --> 00:02:28.000 +[Teleprinter chatters. Operator hands a message to Captain Carpenter.] + +00:02:28.000 --> 00:02:32.000 + +Good God! Get me the Supreme Commander Land, Sea and Air Forces, immediately! + +00:02:32.000 --> 00:02:45.000 +[Supreme Commander's office: he furtively sniffs armpits and shoe; intercom buzzes.] + +00:02:45.000 --> 00:02:46.500 + +Hello? + +00:02:46.500 --> 00:02:49.500 + +This is Captain Carpenter sir, from FEAR. + +00:02:49.500 --> 00:02:51.500 + +You mean FEEBLE? + +00:02:51.500 --> 00:03:10.000 +[Rapid exchange culminating in: 'Mr Neutron is missing, sir!'] + +00:03:10.000 --> 00:03:24.000 + +Mr Neutron! Oh my God! OK - Surround the entire city! Send in four waves of armed paratroopers... I want three full-scale global nuclear alerts... And introduce conscription! + +00:03:24.000 --> 00:03:30.000 +[He slams the intercom and goes back to smelling himself.] + +00:03:30.000 --> 00:03:44.000 +So the world was in the grip of FEAR!... [Zoom to Neutron weeding in front garden as multiple GPO boxes are opened up the road.] + +00:03:44.000 --> 00:03:48.000 +[A lady stops to chat.] + +00:03:48.000 --> 00:03:52.000 + +You've got a bit of work to do there, then. + +00:03:52.000 --> 00:03:55.000 + +Yes, it is a problem. + +00:03:55.000 --> 00:04:05.000 + +Mrs Ottershaw never used to bother ... then of course she was very old... she was 206! Well, must be going... if you need any help I'll send Frank round. He could do with a bit of exercise... Fat old bastard... + +00:04:05.000 --> 00:04:12.000 +[Cut back to Commander sniffing himself; further red alert update and boasting about bombing.] + +00:04:12.000 --> 00:04:36.000 +[Commander and Carpenter discuss fear figures; decide to recruit Teddy Salad; instruct Carpenter to get a decent disguise.] + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_44__Mr_Neutron/3_Teddy_Salad_(CIA_agent).vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_44__Mr_Neutron/3_Teddy_Salad_(CIA_agent).vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..2099962e --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_44__Mr_Neutron/3_Teddy_Salad_(CIA_agent).vtt @@ -0,0 +1,148 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Opens at anchor #3 + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[The Yukon. Carpenter treks in ballet tights with a knapsack marked 'Nothing to do with FEEBLE'. He rings at a log cabin.] + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:10.000 + +Oh, hello. My name's Carpenter. I'm from the US Government. + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:12.500 + +Are you from the army? + +00:00:12.500 --> 00:00:18.000 + +Er... no... I'm... I'm from the ballet. The US Government Ballet. + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:36.000 +[Lumberjack and bevy of beautiful boys enthuse about ballet and Margot Fonteyn being 206.] + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:40.000 + +I hear there's a US ballet organizer round these parts by the name of Teddy Salad. + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:45.000 + +You mean the special agent? He's an ex-CIA man. He's not a ballet dancer. + +00:00:45.000 --> 00:00:49.000 +[Laughter from boys. Directions to the store. Request for Lionel Blair's autograph.] + +00:00:49.000 --> 00:00:54.000 +While precious time was being lost in Canada, the seconds were ticking away for the free world... + +00:00:54.000 --> 00:01:04.000 +[Neutron wallpapers with vast Frank Smailes; diet chat and 'salad' confusion with 'Teddy Salad'.] + +00:01:04.000 --> 00:01:10.000 +[Trading post: Italian chef serves Carpenter a huge salad; 'We're not Eskimos' routine.] + +00:01:10.000 --> 00:01:14.000 + +You don't like it? + +00:01:14.000 --> 00:01:19.000 + +No, I didn't want to eat a salad. I wanted to find out about a man called Salad. + +00:01:19.000 --> 00:01:36.000 +[Fish orders, canelloni rejected, 'We are not Eskimos' gag repeats.] + +00:01:36.000 --> 00:01:42.000 + +Do any of you Eskimos ... speak ... English? + +00:01:42.000 --> 00:01:45.000 + +We're not Eskimos! + +00:01:45.000 --> 00:01:48.000 + +I am. + +00:01:48.000 --> 00:01:58.000 +[Haddock! — 'Where?' — Teddy Salad info; chanting 'Gunga gunga, where's our fish?'] + +00:01:58.000 --> 00:02:02.000 + +He's a... er... hen-teaser. + +00:02:02.000 --> 00:02:05.000 +[CUTAWAY CAPTION: 'WHAT IS A HEN-TEASER?'] + +00:02:05.000 --> 00:02:12.000 + +Oh, he lives up at Kipper Sound. + +00:02:12.000 --> 00:02:20.000 +[Arctic wastes: Carpenter meets Trapper with huskies and two deep-frozen bikini ladies on sled.] + +00:02:20.000 --> 00:02:24.000 + +Hi! I'm Carpenter of the US Ballet. + +00:02:24.000 --> 00:02:34.000 +[Trapper gushes about Ballet Rambert; Carpenter asks for Teddy Salad.] + +00:02:34.000 --> 00:02:38.000 + +The one on the end, on the right. That's Salad. + +00:02:38.000 --> 00:02:40.000 + +That's a dog! + +00:02:40.000 --> 00:02:52.000 +[Elaborate explanation of Teddy Salad's disguise surgeries and tail; move to lone tree to talk to the dog; 'Do you have a bone?'] + +00:02:52.000 --> 00:03:06.000 + +Sir ... Mr Salad ... I've come direct from the Commander... Mr Neutron is missing... The General says you're the only one who'll know where to find him. + +00:03:06.000 --> 00:03:10.000 + +He wants to go walkies. + +00:03:10.000 --> 00:03:16.000 +[Carpenter takes Teddy for walkies, briefing him en route.] + +00:03:16.000 --> 00:03:22.000 +While Carpenter took the most brilliant agent the CIA ever had for walkies, events in the world's capitals were moving fast! + +00:03:22.000 --> 00:03:55.000 +[10 Downing Street as restaurant; Giuseppe the gypsy violinist interferes during security briefing; PM and Secretary discuss US Red Alert and London bombing threat.] + +00:03:55.000 --> 00:04:10.000 +[Back in Arctic: 'Did he tell you anything?' — 'We chased sticks... reindeer.' Plan to use meatballs for intel.] + +00:04:10.000 --> 00:04:24.000 +[Dog speaks, pained. Confirms mission; asks to go walkies again.] + +00:04:24.000 --> 00:04:33.000 +[Supreme Commander, nude, sponge bath; orders bombing of Moscow, Peking, and Shanklin.] + +00:04:33.000 --> 00:04:42.000 +[Stock B-52 bombing montage; apology van in Enfield with loudspeaker: 'Sorry Enfield! ...'] + +00:04:42.000 --> 00:04:55.000 +But what of Mr Neutron... He had not been idle! + +00:04:55.000 --> 00:05:45.000 +[Neutron falls in love with Mrs Scum; Kellogg's competition; £5,000 vs ice cream; proposal to dominate the world; 'You're not Jewish are you?'] + +00:05:45.000 --> 00:06:15.000 +[Campfire: long Teddy reminiscence as Cairo water hydrant; meatball bargain; 'I know where Neutron is...' — 'He's in... Europe!... England... London... at Number 19—' — EXPLOSION.] + +00:06:15.000 --> 00:06:22.000 + +OK. That's the Yukon - what's left? ... OK! Let's start with my office. [big explosion] + +00:06:22.000 --> 00:06:35.000 +[Gobi Desert: GPO opens boxes encircling desert. SUBTITLE: 'THIS NEW BOX COMPLETES THE ENCIRCLEMENT OF THE GOBI DESERT' / 'THE POST OFFICE IS NOW IN A POSITION TO ACHIEVE COMPLETE WORLD DOMINATION'] + +00:06:35.000 --> 00:07:05.000 +[Neutron promises Benidorm and beauty; flashes hands; Mrs Scum appears in C&A twin set and pearls; she gushes; he hushes her; they prepare to leave; world-destroying animation.] + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_44__Mr_Neutron/5_Conjuring_Today.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_44__Mr_Neutron/5_Conjuring_Today.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..3724383d --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_44__Mr_Neutron/5_Conjuring_Today.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,21 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Opens at anchor #5 + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 +[CAPTION: 'CONJURING TODAY'] + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:10.000 +[A conjurer with fright wig and ping-pong eyes holds a bloodstained saw.] + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:18.000 + +Good evening, last week we learned how to saw a lady in half. This week we're going to learn how to saw a lady into three bits and dispose of the body... + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:24.000 +[Two policemen chase him off the set, past the 'Radio Times' man on the phone. On his TV set the chase continues.] + +00:00:24.000 --> 00:00:34.000 + +Look if you can put on rubbish like that, and 'Horse of the Year Show', you can afford us another minute, Mr Cotton, please, I mean look at this load of old... + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_45__Party_Political_Broadcast/0_Episode45_head_tail.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_45__Party_Political_Broadcast/0_Episode45_head_tail.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..3837ffdd --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_45__Party_Political_Broadcast/0_Episode45_head_tail.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,29 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Intro caption, voiceover lead-in, animated titles, and end credits for Episode 45. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 +[caption] A PARTY POLITICAL BROADCAST ON BEHALF OF THE LIBERAL PARTY + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:10.000 + +There now follows a Party Political Broadcast on behalf of the Liberal Party… + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:12.500 +[action] Animated titles play; cut to a drawing of Indians attacking a fort. Music: 'The Big Country' theme. + +00:00:12.500 --> 00:00:24.000 +[caption] IN THE SPRING OF 1863 THE COMANCHES RALLIED UNDER THEIR WARRIOR LEADER CONCHITO IN A FINAL DESPERATE ATTEMPT TO DRIVE THE WHITE MAN FROM THE RICH HUNTING LANDS OF THEIR ANCESTORS. THE US CAVALRY WERE DRAWN UP AT FORT WORTH, AND THE SCENE WAS SET FOR THE FINAL ALL OUT ONSLAUGHT THAT COULD SET THE NEW TERRITORIES ABLAZE + +00:12:00.000 --> 00:12:06.000 +[caption] PARTY POLITICAL BROADCAST ON BEHALF OF THE LIBERAL PARTY + +00:12:06.000 --> 00:14:00.000 +[action] Roll end credits on black background. The first part of the signature tune is played very hesitantly on guitar. + +00:14:00.000 --> 00:14:20.000 +[caption] PARTY POLITICAL BROADCAST ON BEHALF OF THE LIBERAL PARTY WAS CONCEIVED, WRITTEN AND PERFORMED BY J. THORPE (AGE 2); C. SMITH (AGE 1 1/2); L. BYERS (AGE 0). UNSUCCESSFUL CANDIDATES: GRAHAM CHAPMAN (LEICESTER NORTH, LOST DEPOSIT); TERRY GILLIAM (MINNEAPOLIS NORTH, LOST DEPOSIT TWICE); ERIC IDLE (SOUTH SHIELDS NORTH, LOST DEPOSIT BUT FOUND AN OLD ONE WHICH HE COULD USE); TERRY JONES (COLWYN BAY NORTH, SMALL DEPOSIT ON HIS TROUSERS); MICHAEL PALIN (SHEFFIELD NORTH, LOST HIS TROUSERS). MORE UNSUCCESSFUL CANDIDATES: CAROL CLEVELAND (LIBERAL); BOB E. RAYMOND (VERY LIBERAL); PETER BRETT (EXTREMELY LIBERAL AND RATHER RUDE). EVEN MORE UNSUCCESSFUL CANDIDATES: DOUGLAS ADAMS (SILLY WORD, NORTH); NEIL INNES (SILLY WORDS AND MUSIC, NORTH). (COPYRIGHT 1984 THORPE-O-HITS LTD) + +00:14:20.000 --> 00:15:20.000 +[caption] MAKE-UP AND HAIRDRESSING: JO GRIMOND. MORE MAKE-UP: MAGGIE WESTON. EVEN MORE MAKE-UP: ANDREW ROSE (COSTUMES NORTH). MUCH MORE MAKE-UP: STAN SPEEL (FILM CAMERAMAN NORTH). MAKE-UP AND SOUND RECORDING: RON (NORTH) BLIGHT. ROSTRUM CAMERA WITH MAKE-UP: PETER WILLIS. FILM EDITOR AND NOT MAKE-UP: BOB DEARBERG. NOT FILM EDITOR NOT MAKE-UP BUT DUBBING MIXER: ROD GUEST. LIGHTING, MAKE-UP AND PRICES AND INCOMES POLICY: JIMMY PURDIE. VISUAL EFFECTS AND MR THORPE'S WIGS: JOHN HORTON. PRODUCTION ASSISTANT: BRIAN JONES (MAKE-UP NORTH). DESIGNER (NORTH): VALERIE WARRENDER (FAR TOO LIBERAL). PRODUCED BY MR LLOYD GEORGE (WHO KNEW IAN MACNAUGHTON'S FATHER). A BBC-LIBERAL-TV-PARTY PRODUCTION (NORTH) + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_45__Party_Political_Broadcast/10_Cricket_match_(assegais).vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_45__Party_Political_Broadcast/10_Cricket_match_(assegais).vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..2e0edce1 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_45__Party_Political_Broadcast/10_Cricket_match_(assegais).vtt @@ -0,0 +1,48 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE County ground highlights with 'Pratt' batting against Kalahari bowlers using weapons. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:05.000 +[action] County ground pavilion mid-shot; zoom to commentator on balcony. + +00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:18.000 + +Warwickshire had dismissed the Kalahari Batsmen for 140, and then it was their turn to face this extraordinary Kalahari attack. Pratt was the first to go, but Pratt and Pratt put on a second wicket stand of nought, which was broken by Odinga in his most hostile mood. + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:27.000 +[action] Compilation: bowler thunders to crease, produces spear, hurls it; batsman hit full in stomach; bat dislodges bails; fielders shout 'howzat'; batsman sinks to ground. + +00:00:27.000 --> 00:00:29.500 +[caption] B. RATT + +00:00:29.500 --> 00:00:40.000 + +Thats B. Pratt, hit wicket - 0. But Pratt and Z. Pratt dug in and took the score to a half… [action] B. Pratt's body remains on ground. … before Z. Pratt ran away. [action] Z. Pratt reaches pavilion under hail of spears and arrows. But out came M.J.K. Pratt… [action] M.J.K. Pratt walks out, pulling on gloves. + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:47.000 + +[action] At crease; bowler bowls. He'd taken his own score up to nought when he mistimed a shot off Bowanga and was lbw. [action] A huge spear pierces lower leg; he limps off. + +00:00:47.000 --> 00:00:49.000 +[caption] M.J.K. PRATT + +00:00:49.000 --> 00:00:56.000 + +Typical of Umbonga's hostile opening spell was his dismissal of V.E. Pratt, who offered no resistance to this delivery… + +00:00:56.000 --> 00:01:02.000 +[action] Bowler delivers machete; it leg-spins up, slicing off batsman's head as he waves his bat; caught behind by keeper. + +00:01:02.000 --> 00:01:04.000 +[caption] V.E. PRATT + +00:01:04.000 --> 00:01:18.000 +[caption] C.U. PRATT KILLED OUTRIGHT, BOWLED ODINGA - 0. P.B.T.R. PRATT LEGS OFF BEFORE WICKET, BOWLED ODINGA - 0. B.B.C.T.V. PRATT ASSEGAI UP JACKSEY, BOWLED UNBOKO - 0. Z. PRATT MACHETE BEFORE WICKET, BOWLED UMBONGA - 0. M.J.K. PRATT STUMP THROUGH HEAD, BOWLED UMBONGA - 0. V.E. PRATT RAN AWAY - 0. P.D.A. PRATT RETIRED HURT - 0. W.G. PRATT RETIRED VERY HURT - 0. PRATT DIED OF FRIGHT, BOWLED ODINGA - 0. Y.E.T.A.N.O.T.H.E.R. PRATT NOT OUT BUT DREADFULLY HURT- 139. + +00:01:18.000 --> 00:01:22.000 +[action] Presenter stands with 'Sport' replacing 'World's Most Awful Family' behind. + +00:01:22.000 --> 00:01:26.000 + +And so with the tension colossal as we come up to the last ball … that's all from us. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_45__Party_Political_Broadcast/11_BBC_News_(handovers).vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_45__Party_Political_Broadcast/11_BBC_News_(handovers).vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..bb6a3967 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_45__Party_Political_Broadcast/11_BBC_News_(handovers).vtt @@ -0,0 +1,45 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Newsreader with chaotic newsroom; chain of handovers and final caption. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Nine O'Clock News intro; newsroom behind is partying; Jeremy Thorpe among celebrants; a woman dances on the table. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:36.000 + +Good evening. Over 400,000 million pounds were wiped off the value of shares this afternoon, when someone in the Stock Exchange coughed. Sport: capital punishment is to be re-introduced in the first and second division. Any player found tackling from behind or controlling the ball with the lower part of the arm will be hanged. But the electric chair remains the standard punishment for threatening the goalie. Referee's chairman, Len Goebbels said 'at last the referee has been given teeth'. Finally, politics: the latest opinion poll published today shows Labour ahead with 40%, the AA second with 38% and not surprisingly Kentucky Fried Chicken running the Liberals a very close third. And now back to me. Hello. And now it's time to go over to Hugh Delaney in Paignton. + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:42.000 +[action] Linkman on the pier at Paignton; small crowd behind; Jeremy Thorpe waves from the back. + +00:00:42.000 --> 00:00:46.000 + +Hello and welcome to Paignton, because it's from Paignton that we take you straight back to the studio. + +00:00:46.000 --> 00:00:50.000 +[action] Studio: man in swimming trunks and snorkel holds a stuffed polecat on a pole. + +00:00:50.000 --> 00:00:52.000 + +Hello. And it's from here we go over there. + +00:00:52.000 --> 00:00:55.000 +[action] Cut to 'Most Awful Family' presenter. + +00:00:55.000 --> 00:00:57.000 + +Well we're already here so let's go over there. + +00:00:57.000 --> 00:01:00.000 +[action] Back to newsreader. + +00:01:00.000 --> 00:01:06.000 + +Welcome back. And now it's time for part eight of our series about the life and work of Ursula Hifier, the Surrey housewife who revolutionized British beekeeping in the nineteen-thirties. + +00:01:06.000 --> 00:01:10.000 +[caption] THAT WAS A PARTY POLITICAL BROADCAST ON BEHALF OF THE LIBERAL PARTY + +00:01:10.000 --> 00:01:12.000 +[action] Newsreader's voice breaks up with giggles. Fade to blackout. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_45__Party_Political_Broadcast/1_Most_Awful_Family_in_Britain.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_45__Party_Political_Broadcast/1_Most_Awful_Family_in_Britain.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..5c1f82db --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_45__Party_Political_Broadcast/1_Most_Awful_Family_in_Britain.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,400 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Kitchen scene with the Garibaldi family; TV awards show; Fanshaw-Chumleighs; Jodrell family pepperpots. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Kitchen tableau: Ano-Weet box with 'Free Inside - The Pope + Demonstration Record'; Kevin sprawled on sofa eating baked beans; father flaps 'The Scun' newspaper; plaster shrine to Ian Smith; mother irons underwear and then a transistor radio; flat telephone, lamp, and cat; Valerie in red miniskirt and yellow beehive. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:30.000 + +Pratt… back to Pratt… Pratt again… a long ball out to Pratt… and now Pratt is on the ball, a neat little flick back inside to Pratt, who takes it nicely and sends it through on the far side to Pratt, Pratt with it but passes instead to Pratt, Pratt again, oh and well intercepted by the swarthy little number nine, Concito Maracon. This twenty-one-year-old half back, remarkably stocky for 6' 3", square shouldered, balding giant, hair flowing in the wind, bright eyed, pert, young for his age but oh so old in so many ways. For a thirty-nine-year-old you wouldn't expect such speed. Normally considered slow, he's incredibly fast as he wanders aimlessly around, sweeping up and taking the defence to the cleaners. Who would have thought, though many expected it, that this remarkable forty-five-year-old, 9' 4" dwarf of a man, who is still only seventeen in some parts of the world, would ever really be … Oh and there was a goal there apparently … and now it's Pratt … back to Pratt… Pratt again… a long ball to Pratt… [crackle] + +00:00:30.000 --> 00:00:34.000 +[action] Mother finishes flattening the radio with the iron, folds it neatly, and puts it on the pile. + +00:00:34.000 --> 00:00:38.000 + +I like this Ano-Weet, it really unclogs me. + +00:00:38.000 --> 00:00:41.000 +[action] Ralph knocks a bowl onto the floor. It smashes. + +00:00:41.000 --> 00:00:44.000 + +Oh, do be careful. + +00:00:44.000 --> 00:00:46.500 + +Sorry, mum. + +00:00:46.500 --> 00:00:51.000 +[action] Kevin opens another can of beans and pours them onto his plate, throwing the tin on the floor. + +00:00:51.000 --> 00:00:57.000 + +I mean a lot of others say they unclog you, but I never had a single bowel movement with the 'Recto-Puffs'. + +00:00:57.000 --> 00:01:06.000 + +Now if we … [action] he knocks the cereal box off the table. Oh, sorry, mum … Now if we lived in Rhodesia there'd be someone to mop that up for you. + +00:01:06.000 --> 00:01:16.000 + +[action] Turning from the mirror mid make-up. Don't be so bleedin' stupid. If you lived in bleedin' Rhodesia, you'd be out at bleedin' fascist rallies every bleedin' day. You're a bleedin' racist, you bleedin' are. + +00:01:16.000 --> 00:01:18.000 + +Language! + +00:01:18.000 --> 00:01:21.000 + +Well he gets on my sodding wick. + +00:01:21.000 --> 00:01:23.000 + +That's better. + +00:01:23.000 --> 00:01:28.000 +[action] Mother irons the telephone and the cat; pins them on the line. + +00:01:28.000 --> 00:01:35.000 + +No, the stuff I liked was that stuff they gave us before the war, what was it - Wilkinson's Number 8 Laxative Cereal. Phew. That one went through you like a bloody Ferrari… + +00:01:35.000 --> 00:01:37.500 +[action] The doorbell rings. + +00:01:37.500 --> 00:01:42.000 + +Now, who's that at this time of day… [action] she goes out. + +00:01:42.000 --> 00:01:46.000 + +If it's the man to empty the Elsan, tell him it's in the hall. + +00:01:46.000 --> 00:01:47.500 + +Right, dear. + +00:01:47.500 --> 00:01:50.000 + +And make sure that you hold it the right way up! + +00:01:50.000 --> 00:01:52.000 + +Dad… ? + +00:01:52.000 --> 00:01:55.000 +[action] A middle-aged man appears from the broom cupboard. + +00:01:55.000 --> 00:01:57.000 + +Yeah? + +00:01:57.000 --> 00:01:59.000 + +No no, my dad… + +00:01:59.000 --> 00:02:02.000 + +Oh… [action] he gets back into the cupboard again. + +00:02:02.000 --> 00:02:08.000 + +Dad? Why is Rhodesia called Rhodesia?… [action] he knocks the teapot on to the floor; it smashes. Oh sorry, dad. + +00:02:08.000 --> 00:02:12.000 +[action] Hall doorway: a smart man in a dark suit does strange kung-fu antics. + +00:02:12.000 --> 00:02:17.000 + +No… no, really, thank you very much… no, thank you for calling, not today, thank you. Good morning. + +00:02:17.000 --> 00:02:19.500 +[action] She shuts the door. + +00:02:19.500 --> 00:02:21.500 + +Who was that? + +00:02:21.500 --> 00:02:26.000 + +[action] Coming back in. The Liberal Party candidate, darling… oh … what have you done now? + +00:02:26.000 --> 00:02:30.000 + +Sorry, mum. [action] He stands by the sink which has split in two. I was just washing up… + +00:02:30.000 --> 00:02:32.500 + +Go and sit down! + +00:02:32.500 --> 00:02:35.000 + +Mum? Do you know why Rhodesia's called Rhodesia? + +00:02:35.000 --> 00:02:43.000 + +Do you remember 'Go-Eazi'? They were hopeless… [action] Kevin opens another can of beans; dad flaps his paper in disgust. Little black pellets… tasted foul and stuck inside you like flooring adhesive. + +00:02:43.000 --> 00:02:46.000 + +[action] Valerie has finished her startling make-up. Right, I'm off. + +00:02:46.000 --> 00:02:48.000 + +When are you coming back tonight? + +00:02:48.000 --> 00:02:49.500 + +3 a.m. + +00:02:49.500 --> 00:02:52.000 + +I think it's disgusting… you a Member of Parliament. + +00:02:52.000 --> 00:02:55.500 + +I heard you in the hall last night, snogging away. + +00:02:55.500 --> 00:02:57.000 + +I wasn't snogging! + +00:02:57.000 --> 00:03:02.000 + +Sounded like snogging to me. I could hear his great wet slobbering lips going at yer … and his hand going up yer… + +00:03:02.000 --> 00:03:03.500 + +Dad! + +00:03:03.500 --> 00:03:05.500 + +[action] Strange Man comes out of the cupboard. Yes. + +00:03:05.500 --> 00:03:07.000 + +No … not you. + +00:03:07.000 --> 00:03:09.000 + +Oh! [action] He goes back in again. + +00:03:09.000 --> 00:03:11.000 + +Just mind your language… + +00:03:11.000 --> 00:03:14.000 +[action] Ralph knocks a leg off the table; it collapses entirely. + +00:03:14.000 --> 00:03:16.000 + +Oh, sorry, mum. + +00:03:16.000 --> 00:03:19.000 +[caption] too fat and flatulent to get up. I've run out of beans! + +00:03:19.000 --> 00:03:21.000 + +We was talking, we was not snogging. + +00:03:21.000 --> 00:03:23.500 + +Talking about snogging, I'll bet… + +00:03:23.500 --> 00:03:26.000 +[action] The phone rings. Mrs Garibaldi answers. + +00:03:26.000 --> 00:03:29.000 + +If you must know, we was talking about Council re-housing. + +00:03:29.000 --> 00:03:33.000 +[caption] on the phone. Would it mean going to live in Hollywood? + +00:03:33.000 --> 00:03:35.500 +[caption] desperate but unable to move. I run out of beans! + +00:03:35.500 --> 00:03:39.000 + +Where to re-house his right hand, that's what he was interested in! + +00:03:39.000 --> 00:03:41.000 + +And has Faye Dunaway definitely said yes? + +00:03:41.000 --> 00:03:43.000 + +He is the Chairman of the Housing sub-committee. + +00:03:43.000 --> 00:03:44.500 +[action] The bell rings. + +00:03:44.500 --> 00:03:46.500 + +Snogging sub-committee, more like… + +00:03:46.500 --> 00:03:49.000 + +Ralph, do answer that door will you! + +00:03:49.000 --> 00:03:50.500 + +Beans!! + +00:03:50.500 --> 00:03:52.000 + +Shut up!! + +00:03:52.000 --> 00:03:54.000 + +Yea, mum. + +00:03:54.000 --> 00:03:58.000 +[caption] shouting to Ralph. If it's the man from the Probbo-Rib, tell him it's in the bed. + +00:03:58.000 --> 00:04:03.000 +[action] Ralph gets up; knocks leg off gas cooker; shelves and crockery crash; section of wall collapses revealing hallway. + +00:04:03.000 --> 00:04:05.500 + +Sorry, mum. + +00:04:05.500 --> 00:04:08.000 +[caption] roaring. Beans! Beans! + +00:04:08.000 --> 00:04:09.500 + +Shut up! + +00:04:09.500 --> 00:04:13.000 +[action] A Tarzan-like postman with hat and mailbag swings in on a liana, shouting. + +00:04:13.000 --> 00:04:15.000 + +Postman-a-a-n!! + +00:04:15.000 --> 00:04:18.000 +[action] A gong sounds. They all stop acting. + +00:04:18.000 --> 00:04:22.000 +[action] Stock film of ladies applauding; pull out to presentation studio with glittery compère and sign 'Most Awful Family in Britain, 1974. Sponsored by Heart Attacko Margarine'. + +00:04:22.000 --> 00:04:26.000 + +A very good try there, by the Garibaldi family of Droitwich in Worcestershire. Professor… + +00:04:26.000 --> 00:04:34.000 + +Well, I can't make up my mind about this family… I don't think there was the sustained awfulness that we really need. I mean, the father was appalling… + +00:04:34.000 --> 00:04:36.000 +[action] Two panel members nod vigorously. + +00:04:36.000 --> 00:04:38.000 + +Appalling… yes …. + +00:04:38.000 --> 00:04:43.000 + +He was dirty, smelly and distasteful … and I liked him very much … but… + +00:04:43.000 --> 00:04:45.000 + +Lady Organs? + +00:04:45.000 --> 00:04:50.000 + +Well … they were an unpleasant family certainly, but I don't think we had enough of the really gross awfulness that we're looking for… + +00:04:50.000 --> 00:05:00.000 + +Well, harsh words there for the Garibaldi family of Droitwich in Worcestershire, at present holders of the East Midlands Most Awful Family Award - Lower Middle-Class Section but unable today to score more than fifteen on our disgustometer. Well with the scores all in from the judges, the Garibaldis are number three … and a surprise number two … the Fanshaw-Chumleighs of Berkshire… + +00:05:00.000 --> 00:05:12.000 +[action] Elegant breakfast table; four upper-class folk speak incredibly loudly with appalling accents; overlapping chatter. + +00:05:12.000 --> 00:05:14.000 + +What a super meal. + +00:05:14.000 --> 00:05:18.000 + +Absolutely super. Pat and Max are coming down from Eton to help daddy count money. + +00:05:18.000 --> 00:05:20.000 + +How absolutely super. + +00:05:20.000 --> 00:05:24.000 + +My man at Poirer's says I could have my whole body lifted for £5,500 + +00:05:24.000 --> 00:05:27.000 + +How super… [etc.] + +00:05:27.000 --> 00:05:29.500 +[action] Cut back to panel nodding thoughtfully. + +00:05:29.500 --> 00:05:38.000 + +Well, some of the wonderful behaviour that made the Fanshaw-Chumleighs the second Most Awful Family in Britain 1974. But the winners, by a clear ten point margin, are once again the awful Jodrell family of Durham. Unfortunately, we're not allowed to show you some of the performance that won them an award, but I assure you it was of the very highest standard, was it not, Lady Organs? + +00:05:38.000 --> 00:05:42.000 + +Oh, yes, superb … Mr Jodrell - you know, the old grandfather, who licks the … + +00:05:42.000 --> 00:05:44.000 +[caption] hurriedly. Yes, yes… + +00:05:44.000 --> 00:05:52.000 + +He's superb. His gobbing is consistent and accurate. His son is a dirty foul little creature, and those frightful scabs which Mrs Jodrell licks off the cat are… + +00:05:52.000 --> 00:06:04.000 +[caption] We cut to the same image on a TV screen. Well, thank you very much, Lady Organs … and from all of us all, well done to the Jodrells … and to all of you, not forgetting those of you who may be halfway in between, without whom, of course, and not forgetting who made it all possible, when, and we'll be back, until then and so it's goodnight from me and here's wishing you a safe journey home, thank you for watching this show, don't forget it was all great fun, I've enjoyed it, and I hope you watching at home have enjoyed it too. + +00:06:04.000 --> 00:06:08.000 +[action] The TV is switched off and fades into a dot; pull back to reveal a dirty sitting room with pepperpots family. + +00:06:08.000 --> 00:06:12.000 + +The Jodrells win every bloody year… makes you vomit … dad? + +00:06:12.000 --> 00:06:13.500 + +Yes? + +00:06:13.500 --> 00:06:16.000 + +Get your stinking feet off the bread. + +00:06:16.000 --> 00:06:19.000 + +I'm only wiping the cat's do's off. + +00:06:19.000 --> 00:06:20.500 + +Mum? + +00:06:20.500 --> 00:06:22.000 + +Shut yet face, Douglas. + +00:06:22.000 --> 00:06:24.000 + +I wanted some corn-plasters. + +00:06:24.000 --> 00:06:26.000 + +Shut up and eat what you got. + +00:06:26.000 --> 00:06:28.000 +[action] Wall cat puppet screeches as if its tail were pulled. + +00:06:28.000 --> 00:06:32.000 + +Some fat bastard at the door! [action] to the cat. Shut up! [action] she slaps it; it expires. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_45__Party_Political_Broadcast/2_Icelandic_Honey_Week.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_45__Party_Political_Broadcast/2_Icelandic_Honey_Week.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..32f0b8c4 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_45__Party_Political_Broadcast/2_Icelandic_Honey_Week.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,70 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Doorstep encounter with Icelandic honey seller and family. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] On the doorstep: a man with Nordic accent in female national costume holds tray labeled 'Icelandic Honey Week'. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:12.000 + +A strong hive of bees contains approximately 75,000 bees. Each honey bee must make 154 trips to collect one teaspoon of honey. Hello, sir. + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:14.000 + +What do you want? + +00:00:14.000 --> 00:00:17.000 + +Would you like to buy some of our honey, sir? + +00:00:17.000 --> 00:00:19.000 + +What you doing in here? + +00:00:19.000 --> 00:00:23.000 + +Which would you like, the Californian Orange Blossom, the Mexican, the New Zealand, or the Scottish Heather? + +00:00:23.000 --> 00:00:26.000 + +He can't eat honey. It makes him go plop plops. + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:28.000 + +Come on, please try some. + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:31.000 + +All right I'll have some Icelandic Honey. + +00:00:31.000 --> 00:00:33.000 + +No, there is no such thing. + +00:00:33.000 --> 00:00:36.000 + +You mean you don't make any honey at all? + +00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:42.000 + +No, no, we must import it all. Every bally drop. We are a gloomy people. It's so crikey cold and dark up there, and only fish to eat. Fish and imported honey. Oh strewth! + +00:00:42.000 --> 00:00:44.000 + +Well why do you have a week? + +00:00:44.000 --> 00:00:52.000 + +Listen Buster! In Reykyavik it is dark for eight months of the year, and it's cold enough to freeze your wrists off and there's only golly fish to eat. Administrative errors are bound to occur in enormous quantities. Look at this - it's all a mistake. It's a real pain in the sphincter! Icelandic Honey Week? My Life! + +00:00:52.000 --> 00:00:55.000 + +Well why do you come in here trying to flog the stuff, then? + +00:00:55.000 --> 00:01:00.000 + +Listen Cowboy. I got a job to do. It's a stupid, pointless job but at least it keeps me away from Iceland, all right? The leg of the worker bee has… + +00:01:00.000 --> 00:01:05.000 +[action] They slam the door on him. Jeremy Thorpe peeks around and waves. Animated titles. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_45__Party_Political_Broadcast/3_A_doctor_whose_patients_are_stabbed_by_his_nurse.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_45__Party_Political_Broadcast/3_A_doctor_whose_patients_are_stabbed_by_his_nurse.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..afafa5a7 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_45__Party_Political_Broadcast/3_A_doctor_whose_patients_are_stabbed_by_his_nurse.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,148 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Doctor’s surgery with unethical doctor and lethal nurse; bleeding patient forms. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Doctor's surgery: wall shrine to Christiaan Barnard; doctor with embarrassed Mr Cotton. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:24.000 + +Well, Mr Cotton, you have what we in the medical profession call a naughty complaint. My advice to you is to put this paper bag over your head - it has little holes there for your eyes, you see - and to ring this bell, and to take this card along to your hospital. [caption] He hands him a three-foot card reading 'For Special Treatment'. And I shall inform all your relatives and friends and anyone else I bump into. OK… cash, wasn't it? [action] The man hands over a wad of fivers. Thank you very much. Get out. [caption] Dirty little man. [action] He flicks through 'Medical Practice'. Hmm… Hippocratic oath… it's not in there… jolly good. Very useful. Next! + +00:00:24.000 --> 00:00:28.000 +[action] Out-of-vision scream; a man staggers in clutching bleeding stomach, blood pouring. + +00:00:28.000 --> 00:00:31.000 + +Ah, yes you must be Mr Williams. + +00:00:31.000 --> 00:00:34.000 +[caption] obviously fatally wounded. Y… yes… + +00:00:34.000 --> 00:00:37.000 + +Well, do take a seat. What seems to be the trouble? + +00:00:37.000 --> 00:00:40.000 + +I've… I've just been stabbed by your nurse… + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:46.000 + +Oh dear…. well I'd probably better have a look at you then. Could you fill in this form first? + +00:00:46.000 --> 00:00:48.000 + +She just stabbed me… + +00:00:48.000 --> 00:00:54.000 + +Yes. She's an unpredictable sort. Look, you seem to be bleeding rather badly. I think you'd better hurry up and fill in that form. + +00:00:54.000 --> 00:00:57.000 + +Ahhh … couldn't … I … do … it … later, doctor! + +00:00:57.000 --> 00:01:00.000 + +No, no. You'd have bled to death by then. Can you hold a pen? + +00:01:00.000 --> 00:01:02.000 + +I'll try. + +00:01:02.000 --> 00:01:06.000 +[action] With great effort he releases one hand from his bleeding stomach. + +00:01:06.000 --> 00:01:14.000 + +Yes, it's a hell of a nuisance all this damn paperwork, really it is… [action] He strolls about unconcerned. It's a real nightmare, this damned paperwork. It really is a hell of a nuisance. Something ought to be done about it. + +00:01:14.000 --> 00:01:16.500 + +Do I have to answer all the questions, doctor? + +00:01:16.500 --> 00:01:24.000 + +No, no, no, just fill in as many as you can - no need to go into too much detail. I don't know why we bother with it all, really, it's such a nuisance. Well let's see how you've done, then… [action] Williams half collapses. Oh dear oh dear… that's not very good, is it. Look, surely you knew number four! + +00:01:24.000 --> 00:01:26.000 + +No … I didn't… + +00:01:26.000 --> 00:01:29.000 + +It's from 'The Merchant of Venice' - even I know that! + +00:01:29.000 --> 00:01:32.000 +[caption] bleeding profusely. It's going on the carpet, doctor. + +00:01:32.000 --> 00:01:36.000 + +Oh don't worry about that! Look at this - number six - the Treaty of Versailles, Didn't you know that? Oh, my God. + +00:01:36.000 --> 00:01:38.000 + +Ahgg… aghhh. + +00:01:38.000 --> 00:01:42.000 + +And number nine - Emerson Fittipaldi! [action] gives Williams a look. Virginia Wade? You must be mad! + +00:01:42.000 --> 00:01:45.000 +[action] Nurse enters with a smoking revolver. + +00:01:45.000 --> 00:01:48.000 + +Oh doctor, I've just shot another patient. I don't think there's any point in your seeing him. + +00:01:48.000 --> 00:01:50.000 + +You didn't kill him, did you? + +00:01:50.000 --> 00:01:51.500 + +'Fraid so. + +00:01:51.500 --> 00:01:54.000 + +You mustn't kill them, nurse. + +00:01:54.000 --> 00:01:57.000 + +Oh, I'm sorry doctor. It was just on the spur of the moment. Rather silly really. + +00:01:57.000 --> 00:02:02.000 +[action] She exits, taking a sword from the wall; screams are heard off. + +00:02:02.000 --> 00:02:05.000 + +I'm sorry about the carpet, doctor. + +00:02:05.000 --> 00:02:12.000 + +Mr Williams, I'm afraid I can't give you any marks, so I won't be able to recommend you for hospital. Tell you what - I'll stop the bleeding - but strictly speaking I shouldn't even do that on marks like these… + +00:02:12.000 --> 00:02:14.000 +[action] Nurse re-enters covered in blood. + +00:02:14.000 --> 00:02:16.000 + +There are no more patients now, doctor. + +00:02:16.000 --> 00:02:18.000 + +Oh well, let's go and have lunch, then. + +00:02:18.000 --> 00:02:21.000 + +What about… er… + +00:02:21.000 --> 00:02:27.000 + +Ah yes - look, Mr Williams we're just popping out for a bite of lunch while we've got a spare moment, you know. Look, have another bash at the form… and if at least you can answer the question on history right, then we may be able to give you some morphine or something like that, OK? + +00:02:27.000 --> 00:02:29.000 + +Thank you, doctor, thank you. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_45__Party_Political_Broadcast/4_Brigadier_and_Bishop.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_45__Party_Political_Broadcast/4_Brigadier_and_Bishop.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..ccfe8b7c --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_45__Party_Political_Broadcast/4_Brigadier_and_Bishop.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,75 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE A brigadier in partial uniform and tutu dictates to a bishop; mutual confession. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Large country house sitting room; giant portrait of Jeremy Thorpe. Bishop typing; Brigadier in full military uniform above, lavender tutu and hairy legs below, socks and high heels. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:12.000 + +Dear Sir, I wish to protest in the strongest possible terms. Yours sincerely, Brigadier N. F. Marwood-Git (retired). Read that back, will you, Brian. + +00:00:12.000 --> 00:00:18.000 + +And when he had built up Cedron, he sent Horsemen there, and an host of footmen to the end that issuing out they might make outroads upon the ways of Judea, as the King commanded them… + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:22.000 + +Good! Pop it in an envelope and bung it off! It's no good bottling these things up, Brian. If you feel them you must say them or you'll just go mad… + +00:00:22.000 --> 00:00:27.000 + +Oh yes indeed … as the book of Maccabee said … Ye as the flea is like unto an oxen, so is the privet hedge liken unto a botanist black in thy sight, O Lord! + +00:00:27.000 --> 00:00:30.000 + +Quite… Look why don't you just nip out for lunch, Brian… + +00:00:30.000 --> 00:00:33.000 + +Yea … as Raymond Chandler said, it was one of those days when Los Angeles felt like a rock-hard fig. + +00:00:33.000 --> 00:00:35.500 + +Brian, let's stop this pretending, shall we. + +00:00:35.500 --> 00:00:38.000 + +Oh… ye… as Dirk Bogarde said in his autobiography… + +00:00:38.000 --> 00:00:43.000 + +Brian… let's stop all this futile pretence… I've… I've always been moderately fond of you… + +00:00:43.000 --> 00:00:49.000 + +Well to be quite frank, Brigadier … one can't walk so closely with a chap like you for… for so long without… feeling something deep down inside, even if it isn't anything… anything … very much. + +00:00:49.000 --> 00:00:52.000 + +Well, splendid… Brian… er… well I don't suppose there's much we can do, really. + +00:00:52.000 --> 00:00:54.000 + +Not on television … no… + +00:00:54.000 --> 00:00:57.000 + +No… they … they are a lot more permissive these days than they used to be… + +00:00:57.000 --> 00:00:59.000 + +Ah yes… but not with this sort of thing… + +00:00:59.000 --> 00:01:02.000 + +No … I suppose they've … got to draw the line somewhere… + +00:01:02.000 --> 00:01:03.500 + +Yes… + +00:01:03.500 --> 00:01:07.000 + +Well take a letter, Brian. Dear Sir, I wish to protest… + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_45__Party_Political_Broadcast/5_Appeal_on_behalf_of_extremely_rich_people.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_45__Party_Political_Broadcast/5_Appeal_on_behalf_of_extremely_rich_people.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..ffda803e --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_45__Party_Political_Broadcast/5_Appeal_on_behalf_of_extremely_rich_people.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,11 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Satirical charity appeal for the very wealthy with no problems. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 +[caption] THERE NOW FOLLOWS AN APPEAL ON BEHALF OF EXTREMELY RICH PEOPLE WHO HAVE ABSOLUTELY NOTHING WRONG WITH THEM + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:34.000 + +[action] At a large leather-topped desk with an elaborate lamp. Hello. I'd like to talk to you tonight about a minority group of people who have no mental or physical handicaps and, who, through no fault of their own, have never been deprived, and consequently are forced to live in conditions of extreme luxury. This often ignored minority, is very rarely brought to the attention of the general public. The average man in the street scarcely gives a second thought to these extremely well-off people. He, quite simply, fails to appreciate the pressures vast quantities of money just do not bring. Have you at home, ever had to cope with this… [action] cut to rich young yachting type with girls in bikinis… or this… [action] rich woman loading chauffeur with parcels… or even this… [caption] still of Centre Point. I know it's only human to say, 'Oh this will never happen to me', and of course, it won't. I'm asking you, please, please, send no contributions, however large, to me. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_45__Party_Political_Broadcast/6_The_man_who_finishes_other_peoples_sentences.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_45__Party_Political_Broadcast/6_The_man_who_finishes_other_peoples_sentences.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..6b274a8b --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_45__Party_Political_Broadcast/6_The_man_who_finishes_other_peoples_sentences.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,243 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Mrs Long Name meets Mr Vernon, who finishes sentences; subsequent baby gag and heroic walk. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:05.000 +[action] We see the appeal on a TV in Mrs Long Name's living room. Doorbell. A cupboard opens; the middle-aged man from earlier steps out (no iguana). + +00:00:05.000 --> 00:00:07.500 + +All right, I'll go. + +00:00:07.500 --> 00:00:10.000 + +There now follows a Party Political Broadcast on behalf of the Liberal Par… + +00:00:10.000 --> 00:00:13.000 +[action] She turns the TV off; it folds and collapses to the floor in dust. She goes to the front door, humming 'Anything Goes'. + +00:00:13.000 --> 00:00:15.000 + +Hello, madam… + +00:00:15.000 --> 00:00:17.000 + +Ah hello… you must have come about… + +00:00:17.000 --> 00:00:18.500 + +Finishing the sentences, yes. + +00:00:18.500 --> 00:00:20.500 + +Oh… well… perhaps you'd like to… + +00:00:20.500 --> 00:00:23.500 + +Come through this way… certainly… [action] They enter sitting room. Oh, nice place you've got here. + +00:00:23.500 --> 00:00:26.000 + +Yes … well … er… we… + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:27.500 + +Like it? + +00:00:27.500 --> 00:00:30.000 + +Yes … yes we certainly… + +00:00:30.000 --> 00:00:33.000 + +Do… Good! Now then… when did you first start… + +00:00:33.000 --> 00:00:35.000 + +… finding it difficult to… + +00:00:35.000 --> 00:00:37.500 + +Finish sentences… yes. + +00:00:37.500 --> 00:00:40.000 + +Well it's not me, it's my… + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:41.500 + +Husband? + +00:00:41.500 --> 00:00:43.000 + +Yes. He… + +00:00:43.000 --> 00:00:45.000 + +Never lets you finish what you've started. + +00:00:45.000 --> 00:00:47.500 + +Quite. I'm beginning to feel… + +00:00:47.500 --> 00:00:49.500 + +That you'll never finish a sentence again as long as you live. + +00:00:49.500 --> 00:00:50.500 + +Exact… + +00:00:50.500 --> 00:00:52.000 + +ly. It must be awful. + +00:00:52.000 --> 00:00:54.000 + +It's driving me… + +00:00:54.000 --> 00:00:55.500 + +To drink? + +00:00:55.500 --> 00:00:57.000 + +No, rou… + +00:00:57.000 --> 00:00:58.000 + +nd the be… + +00:00:58.000 --> 00:00:59.000 + +en… + +00:00:59.000 --> 00:01:00.000 + +d… + +00:01:00.000 --> 00:01:01.000 + +Yes… + +00:01:01.000 --> 00:01:02.500 + +May I… + +00:01:02.500 --> 00:01:04.000 + +Take a seat… + +00:01:04.000 --> 00:01:09.000 + +Thank you. [action] He sits. You see, our method is to reassure the patient by recreating normal… er… + +00:01:09.000 --> 00:01:11.000 + +Conditions? + +00:01:11.000 --> 00:01:16.000 + +Yes. Then we try to get them in a position where they suddenly find that they're completing other people's sentences… + +00:01:16.000 --> 00:01:18.000 +[caption] with self-wonder. Themselves! + +00:01:18.000 --> 00:01:20.500 + +Spot on Mrs… + +00:01:20.500 --> 00:01:22.000 +[caption] hesitantly. Smith? + +00:01:22.000 --> 00:01:24.000 + +Good! Well, try not to overdo it to… + +00:01:24.000 --> 00:01:25.500 +[caption] with growing confidence. Begin with… ? + +00:01:25.500 --> 00:01:27.500 + +Good. Just keep it to one or two… + +00:01:27.500 --> 00:01:29.000 +[caption] faster. Words …. + +00:01:29.000 --> 00:01:32.000 + +To start off with, otherwise you may find that you're… + +00:01:32.000 --> 00:01:35.000 + +Taking on too long a sentence and getting completely … er… + +00:01:35.000 --> 00:01:37.000 + +Stuck. Good. Yes. Well that's about it… + +00:01:37.000 --> 00:01:39.000 +[caption] completely confident now. for now, so… + +00:01:39.000 --> 00:01:41.000 + +Thanks very much for calling. + +00:01:41.000 --> 00:01:42.500 + +Not at all. + +00:01:42.500 --> 00:01:44.000 + +And, er… + +00:01:44.000 --> 00:01:46.000 + +Just like to say + +00:01:46.000 --> 00:01:48.000 + +Thank you very much for coming along. + +00:01:48.000 --> 00:01:49.500 + +Not at all + +00:01:49.500 --> 00:01:51.000 + +And good… + +00:01:51.000 --> 00:01:52.500 + +Bye, Mr… + +00:01:52.500 --> 00:01:54.000 + +Vernon. + +00:01:54.000 --> 00:01:56.000 +[action] Mrs Long Name leaves; Mr Vernon shuts the door. + +00:01:56.000 --> 00:01:57.500 + +Carl? + +00:01:57.500 --> 00:01:59.000 + +Yes, dear? + +00:01:59.000 --> 00:02:01.500 + +I've just had another baby. + +00:02:01.500 --> 00:02:03.500 + +Oh, no! How many's that now? + +00:02:03.500 --> 00:02:06.000 + +Twelve since lunch… Oh! There's another one! + +00:02:06.000 --> 00:02:14.000 +[action] Exterior: Mrs Long Name walks purposefully up the road past pepperpot nannies digging; one works a pneumatic drill, stripped to the waist in a pink bra. Heroic shots: out of town, through suburbs, into country, into wilder country. She stops, looks up, inspired. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_45__Party_Political_Broadcast/7_David_Attenborough.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_45__Party_Political_Broadcast/7_David_Attenborough.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..f219ec3f --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_45__Party_Political_Broadcast/7_David_Attenborough.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,14 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Link at Stonehenge; Attenborough in jungle pursuing walking tree. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:04.000 + +This is Stonehenge … and it's from here we go to Africa. + +00:00:04.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Jeremy Thorpe appears at edge of shot and waves. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:12.000 +[action] Jungle location. A large tree foreground. Attenborough pushes through, sweating; two African guides with saxophones. + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_45__Party_Political_Broadcast/8_The_walking_tree_of_Dahomey.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_45__Party_Political_Broadcast/8_The_walking_tree_of_Dahomey.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..7155f793 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_45__Party_Political_Broadcast/8_The_walking_tree_of_Dahomey.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,18 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Attenborough misidentifies stationary tree; sets off to chase walking tree. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:26.000 +[caption] slapping the side of a tree. Well here it is at last … the goal of our quest. After six months and three days we've caught up with the legendary walking tree of Dahomey, Quercus Nicholas Parsonus, resting here for a moment, on its long journey south. It's almost incredible isn't it, to think that this huge tree has walked over two thousand miles across this inhospitable terrain to stop here, maybe just to take in water before the two thousand miles on to Cape Town, where it lives. It's almost unimaginable, I find - the thought of this mighty tree strolling through Nigeria, perhaps swaggering a little as it crosses the border into Zaire, hopping through the tropical rain forests, trying to find a quiet grove where it could jump around on its own, sprinting up to Zambia for the afternoon, then nipping back … [action] a native whispers in his ear. + +00:00:26.000 --> 00:00:40.000 + +Oh, super … well, I've just been told that this is not in fact the legendary walking tree of Dahomey, this is one of Africa's many stationary trees, Arborus Barnbet Gaseoignus. In fact we've just missed the walking tree… it left here at eight o'clock this morning… was heading off in that direction… so we'll see if we can go and catch it up. Come on boys. + +00:00:40.000 --> 00:00:46.000 +[action] They move off; reveal additional saxophone-wearing natives, trumpeter, trombonist, double bassist, guitarist, and a man with a drum kit tied to his back. + +00:00:46.000 --> 00:01:04.000 + +Well, we're still keeping up with it, but it's setting a furious pace. Early this morning we thought we'd spotted it, but it turned out to be an Angolan sauntering tree, Amazellus Robin Ray, out walking with a Gambian Sidling Bush… [action] Jeremy Thorpe waves in background. So on we go … it's going to be difficult - the walking tree can achieve speeds of up to fifty miles an hour, especially when it's in a hurry. [action] Rupert the bearer points excitedly. Super! Well, Rupert has spotted something … this could be it… a walking tree on the move … [action] they move off; water sprays from Attenborough's chest. But, what Rupert had in fact discovered was something very different… + diff --git a/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_45__Party_Political_Broadcast/9_The_batsmen_of_the_Kalahari.vtt b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_45__Party_Political_Broadcast/9_The_batsmen_of_the_Kalahari.vtt new file mode 100644 index 00000000..f6f261a3 --- /dev/null +++ b/tests/testdata/MP/Episode_45__Party_Political_Broadcast/9_The_batsmen_of_the_Kalahari.vtt @@ -0,0 +1,22 @@ +WEBVTT + +NOTE Animated professor VO: reveal tribe of batsmen; setup for cricket match. + +00:00:00.000 --> 00:00:06.000 +[action] Attenborough kneels; holds up The Turkish Little Rude Plant: leaves reveal a sculpted bum. Rupert points excitedly at cricketers. + +00:00:06.000 --> 00:00:16.000 + +The Turkish Little Rude Plant. This remarkably smutty piece of flora was used by the Turks to ram up each other's … [action] Rupert nudges; Attenborough mispoints. Yes, there it was, over the other side of the clearing, the legendary Puking Tree of Mozambique… + +00:00:16.000 --> 00:00:18.000 +[action] Cut to animated professor. + +00:00:18.000 --> 00:00:24.000 + +No, what they had come across was a tribe lost to man since time immemorial… the legendary Batsmen of the Kalahari… + +00:00:24.000 --> 00:00:31.000 + +Primitive customs still survive here as if the march of time had passed them by. But for all the mumbo-jumbo and superstition, the Batsmen of the Kalahari are formidable fighters, as we can see on this rare footage of them in action against Warwickshire. +